NonoZ – Sidelineland

I tried to capture the crashing waves and relentless undertoe of Sir Dark’s Watchfigthers Rumble Match Part 1 in an earlier post. While I’ve been a bit spread thin over the past couple of months, I didn’t want to leave it any longer before I offered the necessary review for the necessary finale of that battle royale rumble from up north, Watchfighters Rumble Match Part 2. If you’ve read much that I’ve written, it will sound familiar when I say that wrestling is drama. Especially when it’s done right, it’s suspenseful and narrative. And WF Rumble Match Part 2 is drama done right. The energy and intensity of the second half of this wild ride is equally as frenzied and hot as Part 1, but the pace is a tad more deliberate. All that’s left are the last few lucky entrants to jump into the fray late in the line up and join the iron men with the stamina and stubbornness to endure while the first couple of layers of hopefuls got peeled off.

The roster for part 2 is more concise than part 1. B Sprite and Neil are still going at it as holdovers from the first half, along with Isaac, Kayden, and Chase. Fuck, everyone wants to wring suffering out of Neil, and I get that. He’s solid enough to not easily break, and it turns out he can suck down punishment with a tenacity that makes me want to see just how much he can take. He can take a lot, and he looks beautiful doing it.

Kayden and Chase are absolute titans in these final rounds. They’re fucking big, solid, and just so extensively experienced as hungry heels. I’m pretty sure if they cooperated even a little bit, they’d have wiped the floor with the competition and then had only each other to tuck in against in the end. Heels aren’t really known for cooperation, though, are they? Even still, I’m convinced the two of them are just too big and mean to do anything but outlast everyone…. right up until Leon Cyrus clocks in.

Fuck, Leon. I enjoyed watching him wrestle Dash Halley’s pecs at Wrestlefest Live in NYC last February. A lot. Leon is fucking massive and skilled, somehow managing to pull off a bulldozer heavyweight vibe while staying just this side of the line of earnest babyface. He’s a total wild card showing up so late in the rumble that suddenly I’m thinking Kayden and Chase might not just run away with this. In fact, this feels like anyone’s game again. There’s a real possibility of Kayden, Chase, and Leon being capable of doing serious damage to each other and leaving an opening for a sleeper underdog to sprint for the finish. There are three sharks circling, and fuck the drama is rich!

Chase gets double teamed by Isaac and Kayden, which feels like an incredibly sexy heel tag team to me. I feel like Isaac and Kayden run on the same octane, which burns hot and slow with an strong whiff of inevitability. But the alliances morph constantly, as if despite the fun of collabs, they keep reminding themselves that this is every man for himself. Rick Roma barrels in like a house on fire, tucking into Isaac’s hot bod like Thanksgiving leftovers. Isaac white knuckles it to the very bitter end, but the hairy hottie finally taps when Chase and Rick double team him and, honestly, there was no coming back from that.

When NonoZ clocks in, my already rock hard cock quivers with excitement. Fuck, that man. Like, FUCK… that man! When he just walks up and smack the fuck out of B Sprite’s crotch, I literally swoon. I’d donate a kidney to trade places with Rick when NonoZ hoists him off his feet in a bearhug. The masked hunk is so patient in this way that makes my knees weak, just milking the will to fight out of Rick with his hairy pecs and huge arms crushing like he could keep it up for hours.

My cock similarly throbs with an extra pump of excitement when Beau Jordan clocks in as almost the last entrant in the rumble. This man is ridiculously hot, of course, but when he turns full on sadistic, he’s got this pretty boy ass assassin feel like possibly no one else I’ve seen. Just like I can’t help but picture Kayden and Isaac as tag team, I can’t stop obsessing over the pairing of Beau and NonoZ. They’ve both got this silent intensity perfectly poised on the edge of competitiveness and eroticism. At one point they’re double teaming Neil, not because I think either of them couldn’t put the demolished fucker away single handedly, but because they can’t help themselves but work together like a well oiled machine (fuuuuuck, just picture that in oil?). Beau wordlessly wrenches Neil’s legs apart in a banana split. Simultaneously, NonoZ is immobilizing Neil with a chicken wing, tauntingly folding Neil forward until he starts slamming Neil’s face into Beau’s famously gorgeous curved scimitar, happily at attention.

Again, I say, fuck, this drama is compelling! NonoZ, Beau, and Kayden are the last men standing, and the erotic tension suddenly explodes. NonoZ picks up Kayden’s road kill and starts face-fucking Beau in a helpless schoolboy pin. It’s ally-and-betray, rinse-and-repeat, with Beau and NonoZ’ sensational cocks taking strokes and beatings that make me sweat hard. Again, the smart money is on NonoZ and Beau turning that incendiary chemistry of theirs on Kayden, but in the heat of a battle royale, decisions are sometimes more impulsive than smart. It takes Kayden exactly 3 seconds to congratulate his final rival on their mutual success in knocking the second runner up out of competition, before Kayden is landing a sucker knee to the gut and scooping the sizzling hot pretty boy into a bearhug.

As I mentioned in Part 1, there’s too much drama to do it justice in a review. You’ve just got to watch it and marvel. And, sure, if you’re like. me, you’ll have lost a few loads before you get there, but watch it all the way to the naked ass face scissors smother end.

Just like the incredibly hot and lucky 2nd place winner is asking himself with all that gorgeous ass in his face in the end, my only question is whether this is too much of a sensational thing? There are about 8 or so mini-dramas I want to linger long and very, very hard on, and who can bankroll a custom of my fixation on an erotic tag team beat down pitting Kayden and Isaac squaring off against Beau and NonoZ’s awe-inspiring cocks? Part 2 dials down the frenzy and lets us savor a little more deliberately the spontaneity and raw intensity that comes with throwing this many gorgeous wrestlers onto the same mat. Still, it’s a lot. If you want something slow and deliberate with cinematic blocking and measured close-ups documenting two hot competitors testing their egos against one another, this probably isn’t that. But if you want more of that full throttle, wild and unpredictable energy that is totally the Sir Dark brand, like a sampler plate of the tastiest Watchfighters wrestlers, you want to buy the WF Rumble bundle!

Another wrestling hunk I’ve crushed on from afar without watching wrestle yet is Matt Larsen. He’s intensely handsome, with a hairy, muscled torso and super sexy thick legs. He’s gives me this hypermasculine hit, with his scruff, shaved head, aversion to smiling, and preference for tighty-whities. I’ve cruised his social media for quite a while for his flexing selfies and occasional caps of his matches, but only recently really explored his WatchFighters channel to see the serious depth of his catalog. He’s wrestled pretty much every other wrestling crush of mine that publishes on Watchfighters, so I’m assuming he’s also got good taste going for him. So I decided to sample Matt’s intensely sexy cottage industry going on there on the mats, in some super tidy apartment with gorgeous wood floors.

His opponent for this “Sweaty Competitive Match” is a masked hottie I’ve caught sight of (and done double-takes at) just a few times, NonoZ. I can’t speak to what his face looks like, but holy shit, the rest of him is a work of art. It’s his lightly hairy pecs that I keep fixating on most, and I’m in good company, because Matt’s clearly into them also (again, good taste!). NonoZ is aggressive, initiating the intensely competitive mat tussle over and over again in this cold and cocky way that’s not quite swagger, but close. While his identity remains a mystery, I’m suspecting his name could be Reed Richards, because he somehow manages to stretch that 6’2 frame in ways that seem to defy what I learned in Anatomy & Physiology 101. He just sort of casts his sweetly muscled right arm at will and keeps catching an impressively tight and punishing front facelock on Matt again and again.

The vibe is intensely, intimately competitive. There’s not any 30 seconds of the first 20 minutes when both hot hunks are failing to work their asses off. It’s a battle for inches between two hungry competitors fighting hard for taps. I’m thinking early on that Matt’s got more than he bargained for. He’s on his back the majority of the time, and he’s having to fight hard to keep his masked opponent from ripping his head off. Matt’s clearly wicked strong, though, muscling his way free again and again in a way that keeps frustrating NonoZ. Matt also neutralizes any momentum the masked hottie tries to build by digging his knees into the masked hunk’s kidneys and keeping Mr. Fantastic unable to lock on the chokes he keeps pitching. But despite Matt keeping up an impressive defense, NonoZ persists in aggressively attacking, repeatedly wrapping those hotly muscled arms around Matt’s skull and working on screwing that lid off the jar again.

Over the entire 36 minutes, about 67% of them are devoted to that intense battle for inches, getting sweatier by the second, grunting with effort and frustration, twisting and scrambling across the mat. But that other 33% is this not-quite playful hunger that telegraphs that both of these grapplers want more than just taps out of all this skin-on-skin flexing chess match. NonoZ starts landing hard, cracking slaps on Matt’s gorgeously meaty ass when he’s got the no-nonsense handsome hunk locked up, if not able to get the submission. I’m also digging the masked man’s chuckles that sneak out. Again, they aren’t quite playful, but he’s having fun. He laughs lightly when he’s almost, but not quite, got an armbar locked in place. He chuckles when Matt manages to dig his way out from under the masked hunk’s avalanche of muscle. There’s nothing funny going on, but NonoZ is loving every second that Matt makes him work hard to try to find the key to that stubborn lock.

Personally, I’m totally turned on by the hungry, competitive back and forth wrestling here, but I’m not exactly complaining when, clearly, Matt and NonoZ also turn the corner to getting turned on, too. Somewhere after the second tap out, they venture into no man’s land where it’s hard to tell if this is still about wrestling submissions. They start grinding crotch to crotch. Matt can’t stop groping NonoZ’s pecs and bulging biceps. The masked hunk’s slaps on Matt’s ass turn hungrier, more claiming than punishing. The two of them seem to be as uncertain as I am as to whether their simmering lust is taking over, or if there’s another tap or two to wring out of each other. It’s an incredibly sexy tightrope they walk, building my suspense as to whether it’ll be another submission or an orgasm that happens next.

I’m delighted to offer the spoiler that it’s both. They careen back and forth between working for joint locks and chokes and just burying themselves in each other’s sensational muscles out of lust. By the time one of them is locked up in this sensational rear choke, the victor cooing in his ear as he whips out his enormous, gorgeous cock and starts pounding on himself, I’m perfectly in sync with what’s happening on the screen. Fuck, I can practically smell the sweat and cum, the passion is so spontaneous and genuine.

It’s about 36 minutes from start to finish. There’s an agile cameraman recording, who, I’m guessing, is also a skilled grappler. That’s my guess because, while the action is framed nicely, I’m constantly wanting the camera to linger longer on those tasty asses and the scorching hot aesthetics of these two sensational physiques. The way the loser stares into the camera when he’s blowing his load though… fuck, it’s like he’s looking into my soul and knowing exactly what I want to see! I like the respectfully dangerous vibe between them. I walk away pretty certain that either one of them would have been delighted to beat the living shit out of the other one if they weren’t so closely matched. The story of hard, sweaty wrestling burning so hot it erupts into the loser losing his load with the winner’s arm cranked tight across his throat is my favorite genre, and this is a sensationally satisfying example of hot homoerotic wrestling! Now, for that “erotic grudge match” I see they’ve since wrestled…