And the Winner Is…

Congratulations to the winners of the BG East Besties for 2017! It was a fabulous year in homoerotic wrestling, and all of the nominees demonstrated the deep bench that BG East can rightfully boast. Some of my picks earned the most votes overall. Some didn’t.  They all (but one) get nothing but respect from me. It’s certainly not the first time I’ve seen evidence that my tastes intersect and diverge with other homoerotic wrestling fans. Happily, there’s plenty for all of us to enjoy, and awards or not, my sincere thanks go out to the beautiful men in front of and behind the camera that make BG East a leader in wrestling for a gay audience.

Sexiest Match: Sexiest Match – Ty Alexander vs. Bruno LaBestia (Ringwars 28)

0712_lg.jpg
Bruno enjoys the taste of victory

 

Best Mat Battle: Austin Cooper vs. Christian Taylor (Undagear 28)

h0322_lg.jpg
The biggest upset of the year (not a category) had to be Austin Cooper getting owned by Christian Taylor

 

Best Ring Match: Cole Cassidy vs. Joshua Goodman (Ringwars 26)

0238_lg.jpg
This hold alone is already the stuff of legend

 

Best Squash: Lane Hartley vs. Kirk Donahue (Demolition 22)

0232_lg.jpg
Kirk trashed for the win

 

Best Submissions: Kayden Keller vs. Richie Douglas (Kayden’s Spotlight)

h1116_lg.jpg
Kayden masters the beautiful art of submission

 

Hottest Liplock: Christian Taylor vs. Mason Brooks (Bedroom Brawl 3)

h0124_lg.jpg
Mason aids Christian in remaining the reigning kissing champion

 

Best Overall Match: Cole Cassidy vs. Joshua Goodman (Ringwars 26)

h1007_lg.jpg
Cole throttles his trophy

 

Top Heel: Kayden Keller

0202_lg.jpg
Kayden for the upset win over both Jonny and Kid Karisma!

 

Top Babyface: Richie Douglas

1005_lg.jpg
Richie beats back a challenge from Kirk Donahue

 

Jobber of the Year: Kirk Donahue

0702_lg.jpg
Fuck, I hate this jobber for beating my boy Drake Marcos

 

Debut of the Year: Zip Zarella

1401_lg.jpg
Zip wasn’t my top pick, but you get no arguments from me

 

Best Abs: Kid Karisma

0907_lg.jpg
Kid Karisma beats runner-up Mitch Colby for Best Abs

 

Best Bulge: Joshua Goodman

0906_lg.jpg
I’m thrilled to see Mr. Joshua’s bulge beat last year’s winner, Kirk, to the curb

 

Best Butt: Kid Karisma

0903_lg.jpg
Despite Ty’s social media campaign, he couldn’t rip the title away from the perennial favorite glutes of Kid Karisma

 

Best Body: Kid Karisma

0902_lg
BG East fans agreed with me that it just doesn’t get any better than this!

 

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

There were several outstanding candidates for Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month for the last month of 2017. The new releases were varied and outstandingly sexy, with notable appearances by a number to deserving hunks. Newbies and veterans alike turned my crank and made me stand up and cheer, but one hot hunk edged the fierce competition with sheer tenacity. December’s HWOTM is none other than…

 

 

0101_lg.jpg

Kayden Keller.

0104_lg.jpg
Kayden knocks the stuffing out of Carter Alexander

Not every Wrestler Spotlight adds up to being HWOTM, but Kayden’s debut Wrestler Spotlight easily hands the title to him. All three matches in the collection are fabulous. Kayden digs into Carter Alexander, Kirk Donahue, and Richie Douglas with studied, personalized brutality.

 

0222_lg.jpg
Kayden is a fan pleaser

Kayden’s magnificent demolition of hot bro Carter Alexander was entertaining enough to earn my vote for Best Squash of 2017. The optics are outstanding. Kayden’s red trunks are perfection on his tall, smooth, sexy body.  Carter is the rare opponent who’s tall enough to pretty much look Kayden in the eye, so the apparent evenly matched set-up is that much more titillating to watch Kayden beat the living fuck out of the pin up boy mercilessly. Everyone hits the pause button when Kayden grabs the back of Carter’s trunks and yanks them violently up the pretty boy’s ass, giving Carter fans more of what we love about him so much.

h0214_lg.jpg
But, those legs….

During my interview with Kayden last summer, I nearly had to take a break because his legs were turning me on to distraction. So, watching those mile long beauties squeeze and crush Carter to screaming, weeping agony make a particularly potent image for me. The match as a whole is a contender because both studs are contributing maximum effort. Carter is selling like a mother fucker, and ever since he let slip to Kid Karisma in a moment of passion that he enjoys getting his hair pulled, I can’t help but picture him settling in with the remote control and a bottle of lube to get off on watching himself yanked around and cracked in half in this match.

0602_lg.jpg
A belly button piercing!? Fuck, I hate this guy.

Nearly as satisfying for me is the second match on Kayden’s Spotlight, in which he beats the shit out of hot little pro punk Kirk Donahue. Fuck, I hate that guy. I mean, sure, he’s got one of the sexiest middle weight bodies in wrestling. And, yeah, he’s a phenomenally talented pro wrestler. So, I confess, he ticks off every box that should make me worship his lusciously round ass. But despite all of that, the instant I see him in the ring, I’m cheering for his opponent to rip him to pieces and make him cry. Am I the only one with this much antipathy toward Kirk?

h0612_lg.jpg
Scream, Kirk.  SCREAM!

Clearly, I am not the only one, because Kayden tears him limb from limb with a certain relish that convinces me that, as is quite often the case, he and I are exactly on the same page. A clear difference between this match and Kayden’s match with Carter is how competitive this is.  Kirk drives Kayden to that point that I enjoy so much, with Kayden’s high pitch screams of desperation digging him a hole that most dominant heels don’t have the ego strength to climb out of. But Kayden does, and I love watching him climb, dishing out that much more vicious punishment for the trouble. I just so love questioning if Kayden can still pull a match out, and then watch him rise to the occasion and walk away with his heel credentials completely intact (and Kirk’s balls not).

0624_lg.jpg
“Let me show you some legs with real power.” – Kayden Keller

Knocking that smirk off of Kirk’s face and making him scream like sniveling bitch alone would have earned Kayden the title!

h1017_lg.jpg
Boy next door Richie Douglas puts the hurt on the big man

The final match on Kayden’s Spotlight pits him against It-Boy Richie Douglas. Richie’s stock has been skyrocketing lately, because he’s ridiculously sexy and has slowly revealed a growing appreciation for the sexy side of wrestling. The mismatch in size is stunning. Kayden towers over the boy next door. There’s a sweet give-and-take momentum to the match, however, which feeds both my desire to see Richie improve and to see Kayden have to climb out of a hole.

1012_lg.jpg
Kayden ties Richie in knots with his incredibly long legs

Richie’s sell is the least compelling on this DVD, which only marginally detracts from the visual artwork that is watching Kayden pry him apart at the seams. The action includes a sweet mix of rapid fire momentum flips and long, succulent, crippling submission holds.  Richie is, indeed, improving in every match, and he’s just enough of a tasty challenge to hold up his end of the bargain as Kayden tells that sensational tale of getting upended and driven to the edge of despair, only to dig deeper into his bag of sadistic passion to plow an opponent under.

h1116_lg.jpg
“Do you regret ever getting into the ring with me!?”

Kayden Keller’s Spotlight is beautifully consistent without a hint of redundancy. Each opponent brings a different set of assets and challenges that test the rising heel in unique ways. Challenge by challenge, Kayden sucks down the hard knocks and summons his inner heel to not just turn the tables, not just conquer, but to utterly defile the trio of beautiful babyfaces determined to knock him off as BGE’s hottest young heel. And maybe that day will come. But it is not this day!  This day, Kayden Keller is the heel in charge and, unquestionably, homoerotic wrestler of the month.

0701_lg.jpg
Kayden Keller – December 2017 Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Best Lightweight

The year-end awards season often seems to focus disproportionate attention on the big boys in homoerotic wrestling. Superlatives like “best” seem to inevitably lend themselves to “biggest,” which for many fans may be just fine, but not for me. I have a well documented appreciation for small wrestlers, the lean boys, the “scrawny guys” as Charlie Evans proudly self-identified. In fact, I’ve got a whole lot of lightweight love to give this year, so I’m unilaterally handing an award to my favorite lightweight who I enjoyed seeing wrestle in 2017.  I’m also unilaterally deciding to focus on wrestlers under 150 pounds for this honor. It seems to me Wrestler4Hire and BG East have the deepest benches of lightweights, which I’m sure reflects something about the wrestling content across the industry. In any case, here are my favorite lightweights from action in 2017.

IMG_1046_Fotor.jpg

My third favorite lightweight homoerotic wrestler in 2017 was W4H’s Dashing Dustin. Dashing Dustin is paradox to me. On the one hand, he looks skinny enough to snap like a twig. Cameron lists him as 5’8″ and 140 pounds, which is seriously lightweight. But on the other hand, there’s something substantial and fierce about him that makes him seem like he’s bigger than he is. He is, indeed, dashingly handsome, and if he really is James Quarterstaff’s boyfriend, I hope they’re wrestling like gladiators and fucking like bunnies morning, noon, and night. Strike that.  I actually think that Dashing Dustin is way out of James’ league, and the Dashing one ought to consider trading up to a cuter boyfriend/blogger.

0601_lg.jpg

My second place pick is the super tall drink of diet water Fabrice via BGE. At a reported 6’1″ and 145 pounds, it’s hard to put a finger on a “scrawnier” wrestler in competition. Like Dashing Dustin, Fabrice is deceptively substantial though, and he’s a nasty son of a bitch on the mats. I don’t think I ever realized how much I need a tall, skinny mouthful with a seductively sexy vicious side until I saw Fabrice in action. I’d still like to see quite a bit more muscle on this gorgeous boy just in the interest of good health, but he’s an incredible lightweight homoerotic wrestling contender as he is.

0304_lg.jpg

My favorite lightweight of 2017 is easily the boyband lead singer-come-wrestler, baby boy Nino Leone. At 5’8′ and 140 pounds, he regularly tackles (quite literally) opponents 50-60 pounds heavier. I greatly enjoyed the opportunity to meet Nino in person this summer at the BG East compound, and I was delighted to discover that he possesses a razor wit and disarming charm to go with his hot, hairy, beautiful body. Nino’s epic takedown of bodybuilder Calvin Haynes this year is a perfect demonstration of how the homoerotic wrestling world is infinitely sexier and more surprising with fierce, tough, sexy “little” guys in it.

h0102_lg.jpg
Calvin Haynes completely underestimates Nino
0344_lg.jpg
Nino has his way with the shocked and awed bodybuilder

 

0206_lg-1.jpg
Nino shows Bruno he’s not so little after all

There are plenty more lightweight wrestlers who more than deserve honorable mentions for putting up with size-obsessed wrestling fans, including Charlie Evans (5’8″, 130 lbs), Eli Black (5’7″, 130 lbs), Ricky Vegas (4’9″, 90 lbs), and Kid Romeo (5’5″, 130 lbs).

Who did I miss?

Best Pecs

Sure, abs and glutes get their due, but if we’re singling out muscles, I’ve got plenty more opinions. When it comes to chests, I particularly enjoy pectorals that are thick and geometric, with plenty of lower pec development squaring off the broad, powerful muscles. As with everything, the particulars are a matter of taste. You very well may have different standards about what type of pecs turn you on hardest, but as for me, these are the pecs that stood out from the rest in homoerotic wrestling last year:

0903_lg.jpg

In third place for me are the massive chest muscles on Cole Cassidy. Now, I’d donate a kidney to lick Cole everywhere, with particularly passionate attention paid to his hot nipples. But as for his pecs in total, there’s just about nobody else’s I’d like to see pec smother an opponent more. He seems to be appearing with less frequency at BG East, but I pray to the homoerotic wrestling gods that we see this highly competitive MMA fighter finally face an opponent who appreciates just what a sensationally sexy body all that fight training has produced.

Clark.jpg

My second favorite pecs this year belong to Thunder’s Arena beauty Clark. Holy fuck, this guy had to be a rower at some point. His entire body is, of course, a work of art, but that shape of those pecs is superhuman. I realize that it just can’t happen at Thunder’s, but if ever there was a chest made for pec frottage, it’s Clark’s meaty beauties.

0206_lg.jpg

My number one favorite pecs in homoerotic wrestling in 2017 belong to devastatingly handsome Payton Meadows. I keep second guessing whether I should have given my BGE Bestie vote to Payton for Best Body. I’m running out of superlatives in this post, but Payton’s pecs are simply perfection. Like Cole (and Clark, for that matter), I have yet to see an opponent as genuinely awed by Payton’s gorgeousness as they should be. As for his granite carved pecs, I want to officially apply for the job of Payton’s valet so that I can helpfully lap up the sweat from the sharp crevice between his pecs after his next match. I’ll learn French if that’ll help me land the job.

0103_lg.jpg
Worship that Grand Canyon
0108_lg.jpg
Fuckably flexed
0236_lg.jpg
Magnificent muscle hung out to dry

This is, of course, gay wrestling, so hot hunks paying ample attention to bench presses are more the norm than the exception. So I have to give very worthy honorable mentions to Joey Justice (MDW, aka Joey Nux from Wrestler4Hire), Mr. Joshua Goodman (BGE), Marco (Thunder’s and Wrestler4Hire), and Chase LaChance (BGE, Thunder’s, MDW, W4H). But the most honorable of honorable mentions goes to Mitch Colby and that particular scene in his recent release when Cage Thunder tongue fucks Mitch’s sternum as the hunk smothers him deep and long. If there were an award for sexiest pec action in a wrestling match, that would win hands down.

Best Ink

I can respect gay wrestling fans that are turned off by tattoos. I can’t identify, but I can respect. I, on the other hand, often find them value added.  It’s not every example of skin art that I find sexy, but the right design, the right placement, the right body, and the right artist can exponentiate the allure of a homoerotic wrestler for me.  As for 2017, there were some ink classics and newbies classing up the ring with their artwork.  I’d prefer it if the perennial “tattoos suck” constituency would give it a rest for just this post, but do feel free to comment on what ink turns you on and why. As for me, here are my top 3 picks for the best wrestling ink I saw in 2017.

0503_lg.jpg

In third place is a regular contender for this and many titles, Carter Alexander. In 2017, I think I only saw him wrestling for BG East, but he’s also wrestled in years past for MDW.  Carter is just fucking pretty, so there’s something copacetic about the design of his stylish artwork. The tat down the left side of his torso is particularly choice for me. It sort of demands that he lift his arm behind his head and flex his obliques, which circles me back around to just how fucking pretty he is.

ChristianThorn-2.jpg

In second place for best ink in wrestling this year is W4H’s Christian Thorn. Like Carter, Christian is dazzlingly pretty, and his ink accentuates this obvious fact. The extensive coverage works for me because his body is so incredibly built, that it’s such a pleasure to explore and discover new art as he moves. The rib cage ink accentuates his wide lat spread, and the peak-a-boo lower abdominal tat screams sex. But it’s the design of his upper right arm, shoulder, and pec that I find absolutely stunning. That artwork is made for glistening with sweat and crushing some lucky opponent’s face in a cranking side headlock for art appreciation class.

1501_lg.jpg

My pick for the very best ink in wrestling in 2017 easily goes to Zip Zarella. I’ve got such a massive crush on this indy pro hunk who debuted as a BGE newbie in 2017. His extensive pec tats are balanced, beautiful, and unapologetically in your face, which is precisely the way that Zip wrestles. He’s on the card for BG East’s live show at Wilton Manners on February 22, and I’m sending prayers 7 times a day to the homoerotic wrestling gods that Elite Eliot gets his lips on Zips nips. In the mean time, Zip can do no wrong in my book, and his gorgeous body and magnificent ring skills are perfectly paired with his gorgeous artwork.

0402_lg.jpg
Zip appreciates being appreciated
0202_lg.jpg
The ink is just part of the total package
1511_lg.jpg
Artwork hanging from the ring ropes
0428_lg.jpg
Looking this good, Zip can’t help but smile.

It’s a tough category for me to sort through, because I’m such an art lover. So here are some honorable mentions that nearly made the cut: Calvin Haynes (BGE), Ace Aarons (BGE), Eagle (Thunder’s Arena), and Joey Justice (MDW, aka Joey Nux at W4H).

The Best 4Hire

Wrestler4Hire has ventured into the year-end fan poll territory. They have 10 categories for you to choose from.  You can register your vote here. I’m less familiar with the full catalog at W4H, so my recommendations are likely less informed than many other W4H fans. But you know me. I always have opinions. Here are your W4H Best of 2017 choices.

Best Heel

  • Guido Genatto
  • Ronnie Pearl
  • Nick Justice
  • Dr. X
  • Jobe Zander
  • Garrett Thomas
  • Dick Rick
  • Lon Dumont

 

16221.jpg

I’ve seen all of these contenders in action, and of course I have my favorites. But it will likely come as no surprise to regular readers that I’m voting for Lon Dumont.

Best Jobber

  • Black Starr
  • Zach Reno
  • Cam Zagucci
  • Alex Oliver
  • Jonny Jober
  • Tyler Royce
  • Cal Bennett
  • Chet Chastain

AlexOliver_ZachReno33.jpg

I have seen all of these guys, though not in 2017 W4H matches. Just going with my gut, though, I’m always a big fan of Alex Oliver. His gorgeous ass gets my vote.

Top Newcomer

  • CJ Renik
  • Joey Nux
  • Christian Thorn
  • Cali Boy
  • Scrappy
  • Jax Brewer
  • Tyler Royce
  • Marco Thunder
  • Jaxton Wheeler
  • Ricky Vegas
  • Trenton Ducati
  • Blake Starr
  • Jayden Mayne
  • Austin Tyler
  • Elite Eliot

Marco_Fotor.jpg

First of all… 15 nominations!? There’s some executive leadership needed in order to get this behemoth under control. I have not seen all of these guys (there are fucking 15 of them, after all), but I have seen most. It’s a close all for me between Marco and Elite Eliot. I’ll probably vote for Marco, though.

Favorite Ring Match

  • Ace Owens vs. Elite Eliot
  • Dashing Dustin vs. Dr. X
  • Cameron vs. Ace Owens vs. Nick Justice
  • Tyler Royce vs. Hugh Hunter
  • Cameron vs. Ty Alexander
  • Cal Bennett vs. Elite Eliot
  • Marco Thunder vs. Rendell Zebu
  • Tyler Royce vs. Cam Zagucci
  • Cal Bennett vs. Brad Barnes
  • Elite Eliot vs. Garrett Thomas
  • Nathan FX vs. Garrett Thomas
  • Cameron vs. Jonny Jobber

Cameron_TyAlexander_Wrestlers4Hire_720p_HD_7.jpg

I saw only a couple of these matches, so my opinion is based on incomplete data and a lot of just who I like, rather than a studied comparison of the specific matches. With that in mind, I’ll vote for Ty and Cameron.

Favorite Mat Match

  • Nathan VX vs. Cal Bennett
  • Cameron vs. Jaxton Wheeler
  • Chase LaChance vs. Black Starr
  • Jobe Zander vs. Marco Thunder
  • Cam Zagucci vs. Austin Tyler
  • Cal Bennett vs. Zacky Darlin
  • Cameron vs. Jax Brewer
  • Tyler Royce vs. Jobe Zander

Holy shit, I saw none of these matches. I’ve got nothing worthwhile to contribute to your deliberation. Just based on who I like, I’ll vote for Cameron and Jax Brewer.

Best Butt

  • Cameron
  • Chace LaChance
  • Marco Thunder
  • Braad Barnes
  • Austin Cooper
  • Z-Man
  • Jax Brewer
  • Tyler Royce
  • Cal Bennett

W4HMarcoBlakeButt.jpg

I’m supposed to say company CEO Cameron, but I’m going to say Marco.

Hottest Body

  • Cal Bennett
  • Chace LaChance
  • Marco Thunder
  • Scrappy
  • Blake Starr
  • KARN
  • Austin Cooper
  • Elite Eliot
  • Braden Charron
  • Ricky Vegas

Okay, so finally I have a ton of reasonably well-informed opinions. Chace has won this title over at BG East two years ago. I’m seriously hot for Marco, Scrappy, and Eliot. But I’m voting for Marco.

Best Smile

  • Cam Zagucci
  • Matty O’Boy
  • Blake Starr
  • Cameron
  • Lane Hartley
  • Austin Cooper
  • Zacky Darlin
  • Cal Bennett
  • Marco Thunder
  • Nick Sparx

I like this category a lot. Hands down, most crotch-warming smile belongs to Blake Starr in this bunch.

Best Arms

  • Zach Altovito
  • Jax Brewer
  • Z-Man
  • Austin Cooper
  • Christian Thorn
  • KARN
  • Maverick
  • Braden Charron
  • Cal Bennett

jaxbrewer.jpg

Another great category. Considering forearms as well as upper arms, I’m casting my vote for Jax Brewer. Fuck, I love his arms.

Future Champion

  • Garrett Thomas
  • Joey Nux
  • Ronnie Pearl
  • Jax Brewer
  • Austin Cooper
  • Marco Thunder
  • Cal Bennett
  • BradBarnes
  • Ace Owens
  • Scrappy
  • Elite Eliot

I’m not really sure how to interpret this category. Future champion of what? Does W4H have a championship in contention? Future indy pro champion material? So many questions. The validity of the question is weak, but I’ll still vote for a burning favorite wrestler here, Elite Eliot.

And the Nominees Are…

The first half of the BG East Besties ballot never seems to generate as much controversy as the second half. Turning our focus on individual wrestlers seems to incite even more fevered debates about tastes and types and loyalties. BGE has gone six deep for each category, so there’s bound to be someone for everyone to fight over. Definitely don’t just take my word for who you should vote for, but by all means, vote. And in case you aren’t sure who you want to rally behind, feel free to take some inspiration from how I see things.

8. Top Heel

Last year Jonny Firestorm brought home the title as Best Heel at BG East. Jonny has owned this category for quite a while. The only time he hasn’t won, he wasn’t nominated, in which case Kid Karisma stepped up at grabbed the ring. This year pits these two legendary heels against each other and an equally diverse field of styles, attitudes, and interpretations of the word “heel.”

  1. Cole Cassidy
  2. Jonny Firestorm
  3. Lane Hartley
  4. Kid Karisma
  5. Kayden Keller
  6. Kid Vicious

0222_lg.jpg

What a field! I’m punching an enthusiastic button for the increasingly rare opportunity to vote for the legendary heel, Kid Vicious. Although he only appeared in one product this year, it was classic KV, through and through. No one else on this list takes nearly as much erotic pleasure making an opponent suffer. My second choice would see Kayden Keller jump the line ahead of both Jonny and Kid Karisma. Kayden has become one of the hardest working wrestlers in homoerotic wrestling, and like KV, he’s growing increasingly comfortable in the role of the erotic sadist.  I’m guessing that the popular vote may still break Jonny or Kid Karisma’s way, and obviously they deserve the heel-appreciation. But as for me, KV remains in a league of his own, with Kayden quickly filling the void left by KV’s sparser and sparser appearances in the ring.

9. Top Babyface

The field for top babyface highlights how these awards reflect so much more about the fans than the wrestlers. Some of these guys I wouldn’t classify as babyfaces.  Past winners like Biff Farrell and Jake Jenkins are as absent from the poll as they were scarce in new releases this year. So one of these guys is going to take the title for the first time:

  1. Gil Barrios
  2. Mitch Colby
  3. Kirk Donahue
  4. Richie Douglas
  5. Payton Meadows
  6. Zip Zarella

0102_lg.jpg

As with the heel category, I’m picking a dark horse candidate for as much sentimental reasons as anything else. Mitch Colby epitomizes the erotic-forward babyface that can only inhabit the world of homoerotic wrestling. His epic dismantling of the legendary heel Cage Thunder demonstrates perfectly the distinction that I think so many fans struggle with in distinguishing between a hot jobber and a babyface. And as his opponent has acknowledged, Mitch was in the best shape of his life for that match. I do think it’s criminal that Christian Taylor did not make the ballot. If pressed for a second place, I’d probably go for Richie Douglas. I’m uncertain what character type Zip Zarella is growing into, but he could easily get my vote for top babyface or top heel with a couple more matches under his belt to signal his underlying moral compass. This category seems wide open for predicting a popular vote getter, but I’m thinking things could swing Richie or Mitch’s way.

10. Jobber of the Year

There’s some serious range in interpretations of a jobber among the field for Jobber of the Year. Last year’s winner Ty Alexander is back in the offing, despite his pretty decisive heel turn this year. In fact, I think at least of couple of the nominees this year lack that inevitability about them that I expect to see in a jobber. Take a look at what I’m talking about:

  1. Ty Alexander
  2. Trey Dixon
  3. Kirk Donahue
  4. Charlie Evans
  5. Drake Marcos
  6. Van Skyler

0103_lg.jpg

On the one hand, I do love watching Kirk Donahue get his awardless ass beat again and again. But honestly, the perfect depiction of a jobber is Drake’s match trying to reinvent himself as El Favorito. El Favorito is Drake’s acknowledgment that he’s a jobber, that he’s destined to get plowed under, despite his impeccable skills. Perhaps with a new name, Drake muses that he can start over as something other than a jobber. And then Thrash thrashes him like the jobber he is, in or out of a mask, under any name.  If I were a betting man, I’d guess that Ty, despite openly acknowledging on tape that he is no longer a jobber, may take this again because… social media.

11. Debut of the Year

There was some insane, out of the blue drama a few months back with last year’s Debut of the Year winner, Beauxregard. The category is, by no means, a guarantee of success or respect. In some ways I think Ty Alexander may be the exception when it comes to parlaying the Debut of the Year award into a solid BGE career platform. Beaux, Kip Sorell, Eli Black… it may be possible that this is a “peaked too soon” award for most (though, of course, I’m always hoping to see Eli elevate his BGE game). So this year’s nominees should beware, take nothing for granted. Winning Debut of the Year is, at best, just the start of your hard work on the way to success. The newbies who should heed this warning include…

  1. Ace Aarons
  2. Ash DeLeon
  3. Bruno LaBestia
  4. Steve Mason
  5. Toney Rico
  6. Zip Zarella

0803_lg.jpg

I’m a huge backer of most of these guys, so this is another tough call for me. When push comes to shove, I’m casting my vote for one of the classiest acts to jump over from indy pro success, Ace Aarons. Ace had the skills to turn the stink bomb of Luke Lonza into a relatively satisfying squash, because he took seriously what Luke apparently couldn’t. I’m particularly impressed with his most recent mat match, laced with tons of sweat and lust, with fellow nominee Ash DeLeon. An indy pro who successfully translates his skill set to the mat and to an erotic text is quite an impressive debut, indeed! A second place pic for me would be a close call between Ash (who suffered from having only one match published for his debut year) or Zip Zarella (who classes up the place like Ace, but without the erotic twist).

12. Best Abs

2017 provided a feast for six-pack lovers.  Last year’s winner Chace LaChance failed to make the cut, and personally I think it’s largely because the competition was so spectacular this year. Also absent were previous award winners Z-Man and Eli Black. So this is another category where someone new is guaranteed to take home the trophy this year. The possible breakout abdominal stars are…

  1. Carter Alexander
  2. Devon Britt-Darby
  3. Mitch Colby
  4. Richie Douglas
  5. Kid Karisma
  6. Payton Meadows

0208_lg.jpg

Everyone’s a winner in this category, but when I cast my ballot, I’m going to vote for Payton Meadows. Every inch of Payton is dazzlingly gorgeous, but his abs are exceptionally ripped, balanced, and abs-olutely beautiful. Please, please, please let us see more of him (in every sense of the word) next year. His releases are far too far in between. Second place for me this year is, astonishingly, not Kid K. It was Carter Alexander’s superhuman core that was the standout star of his squash against Kayden, and as I said earlier, his side tat screams for worshiping his sweaty eight-pack. Playing the odds, I’d guess that Richie Douglas could take the title in the popular voting this year, though I never count out Kid K.

13. Best Bulge

After years of there being one standout each season for best bulge, this is suddenly one of the most competitive categories. Last year’s winner, Kirk Donahue, is back to defend his title. Mr. Joshua, who wasn’t nominated last year but has owned the title more often than not, is back in contention. Cage Thunder’s throbbing rod not only blazed to full glory, but got used and abused by his babyface nemesis. And then there was the collective gasp throughout the homoerotic wrestling world when Steve Mason’s debut revealed one of the biggest power tools I’ve ever seen. The full slate looks like this…

  1. Ace Aarons
  2. Kirk Donahue
  3. Joshua Goodman
  4. Steve Mason
  5. Cage Thunder
  6. Jobe Zander

0603_lg.jpg

I’m sticking with Mr. J in this year’s vote. His bulge continues to be so huge that it gets in the way of his wrestling. He continually has to adjust the packing. It walks into a room about 5 seconds before Mr. J does. And Cole Cassidy managed to display Mr. J’s legendary bulge from entirely new angles this year. I’ve got my eye on Steve Mason’s leviathan, though. I think there’s a chance I might be in the middle of the normal curve this time, and the popular vote might also swing to Mr. Joshua, though I wouldn’t be surprised to see Steve knock the competition out of his way with that billy club of his.

14. Best Butt

This is always one of the most hotly debated categories. I’ve already seen a certain nominee launch a full scale social media campaign to finally take home this trophy after coming in second place last year. Here’s who you get to pick from…

  1. Ty Alexander
  2. Gil Barrios
  3. Kirk Donahue
  4. Kid Karisma
  5. Noah Samson
  6. Van Skyler

0801_lg.jpg

I’m more ambivalent about my vote than in past years, but honestly, who am I kidding? I’m voting for Kid Karisma’s phenomenal glutes again. They’re perfect. Magnificent, functional muscles resting atop those massive upper legs. Damn. A second place for me would be either Ty or the epic last minute debut of Noah Samson. Holy fuck, Noah’s ass is unbelievable. Not as tightly muscled and powerful, but aesthetically a work of art. I keep expecting Ty’s social media campaign to pull the rug out from beneath Kid K’s long ownership of this title. Perhaps this will be year Ty can sway a majority of voters to take their eyes off of Kid K’s glorious ass.

15. Best Body

I was so thrilled last year, after years of promoting the obvious physical perfection of Kid Karisma, that I was finally joined by a majority of voters. This year’s field is, as always, hot competition to try to wrest this oft-traded title away:

  1. Carter Alexander
  2. Mitch Colby
  3. Richie Douglas
  4. Kid Karisma
  5. Payton Meadows
  6. Van Skyler

0902_lg.jpg

For my vote, this is a horse race between Kid Karisma and Peyton Meadows. I’d give Payton the edge for his pecs and abs, and Kid K the advantage for arms and shoulders. But the balance of power tilts on Kid K’s full, muscular leg development (including the often overlooked calves). So I’m inclined to, once again, worship at the feet of Kid K as the Best Body at BG East in 2017. Just to confirm my evaluation, I’d love to see these two physical specimens side by side… and then on top of each other, pounding into each other, squeezing, shoving, and grinding each other. As for who the popular vote will tilt toward, I most frequently guess this one wrong. But my (probably wrong) guess this year is that it will go to Kid K or, perhaps, Van, though I do think Payton is slowly accumulating an audience of gasping fans (in addition to me), with the slow trickle of his new releases over time.

This was a spectacular slate of nominees, and I’m not just saying that because I was on the nominating committee. In fact, several of my top choices changed as a result of seeing the official ballot and being reminded by other nominators of choice contenders that deserved a second look. In the coming days, I’ll keep reflecting on categories that aren’t reflected on the official ballots, but matter a lot to me. In the mean time, give your best argument (respectfully) for your votes in the comments below.