Ty Alexander – Sidelineland

And, Of Course, Better Looking

July 23, 2020July 22, 2020 wrestlebard1 Comment

While I was in hibernation from blogging for the past year and a half or so, Ty Alexander made a remarkable metamorphosis. The Trophy Boy made the leap from wrestling for gay eyes to the indy pro ring. When I started blogging again, he graciously welcomed me back on social media, and welcomed my invitation for a quick Q&A about what life has been like making the transition and facing independent wrestling during a pandemic.

Bard: I’ve been out of touch for over a year now. How has it been, Ty Alexander? Or should I say, Tyler Klein?

Tyler: Tyler Klein now. The days of Ty Alexander are just behind me at this point. There may be a comeback in the future, but only time will tell.

Bard: So, the days of Ty Alexander are behind you for now?

Tyler: I mean at this point, kinda, yeah. I’m grateful for my experience as Ty Alexander, but for me, it was time to look for the future. It’s never fun to say goodbye to a part of your life. I actually shouldn’t say goodbye. More like, see you later. Maybe Ty will make a comeback at some point, but who knows when.

Bard: What’s life like as a rising indy pro wrestler?

Tyler: It’s hard to explain, honestly. I wouldn’t say rising. I’m just kinda here. I’ve had some great opportunities, and that’s the coolest part. Just being able to be a LGBTQ wrestler in something, still with lingering homophobia, is a challenge. But only is a challenge when it comes to the crowd, sometimes. I’ve made a ton of super supportive friends who just see me as a fellow wrestler. Which I think is awesome.

Bard: So Tyler Klein is “gay?”

Tyler: Yes, however I don’t want my character’s sexuality to be the one and only focal point. While it’s awesome to be gay, I don’t want to be a stereotype. I’m the premier fashion designer for the Indy wresting world. I’ve taken the Trophy Boy title, and transformed it into my own sort of brand. I’m still a heel, for sure, but one thing I’ll say about being gay is I don’t want him to be the villain because he’s gay. I want those in the crowd to “boo” me because they know I’m better than they are, and, of course, better looking.

Bard: What kind of reception have you had from the indy pro fans?

Tyler: Positive actually. People love to hate me and my tag partner, but they also show their huge support. Occasionally, there will be those who throw the slur. You learn to brush it off, so that’s not all that big a deal anymore.

Bard: How has the pandemic impacted indy pro wrestling?

Tyler: Greatly. There were several huge opportunities in April that I was looking forward to. One was going to my first ever Wrestlemania, and the other was working with Calvin Couture and Sexxy Eddie at Effy’s Big Gay brunch. It was going to be the first live “custom match,” which is what pro wrestlers call BG East type of matches. That was huge, and to just lose out on that opportunity kind of put me in a huge funk. It was arguably the biggest and most talked about show Wrestlemania weekend.

Bard: What do you think is the future of indy pro, when we’re able to get back to full-contact life after social distancing?

Tyler: It will comeback. It’s honestly so funny watching wrestling now, with these no crowd matches. My friends who talk about it always say, wow, I could never do that. I’ve been doing no crowd matches for years, so I’m used to it [laughing].

Bard: Do you still keep an eye on the gay underground scene?

Tyler: Every once and a while. I mean, I did do some matches for UCW. And I def look over BG East. But I don’t do it for the same reasons anymore. I look to see who’s new, and who is the future. Which, I mean, good for them, but [laughing] I don’t think they will ever find anyone as spectacular as Ty Alexander!

Bard: Well, Tyler Klein, I wish you the very best! I hope we see you back in the homoerotic wrestling ring again someday, but I also hope you get back to doing what you love most, which right now, sounds like hitting the pro ring and rubbing your greatness in fans’ faces!

giphy

Tyler Klein fights his own tag team partners just like Ty Alexander always did!

Follow Tyler’s highlights on his YouTube channel here!

Wasted Wednesday

June 24, 2020June 20, 2020 wrestlebard7 Comments

Another Wasted Wednesday has me catching my second wind to get through the week by soaking in the sight of cocky, confident muscle men taken out. This time, I’m contrasting side-by-side images of said hunks, first at the beginning of a match, with fire in their eyes and the wind at their backs, and then about 20 – 30 minutes later after they’ve been laid waste. It’s a big part of what turns me on about wrestling. The psychological drama of getting face-to-face with your vulnerability at high speed is honestly at least as titillating as the sight of gorgeous bodies barely in tight briefs or less. It’s also why I love re-watching matches, to turn back time and watch the strut and bluster, witness the absolute certainty in their superiority. Would they take it back if they knew they’d be flat out, completely defenseless, and totally humiliated in mere minutes? But they don’t know, so they slap their dicks down and reveal a soft underside that only pride, a rocking bod, and a supersized ego can leave you with.

Here are a few choice wrestling hunks who showed up pumped and beautiful and convinced of their invincibility, who ended up crushed just right.

One of my hardest wrestling crushes thoroughly documented in the pages of this blog is Lon Dumont. I was instantly smitten at first sight when this stunningly beautiful competition bodybuilder didn’t just look the part in his debut match in Fantasymen 22, he absolutely owned the ring and his opponent. Now, I never tire of watching Lon (full-stop, but also let me continue) work his top shelf heel magic, particularly when he rocks muscle heads significantly bigger than he is. But I’ve got to admit that seeing him bested and brutalized at the end of Last Man Standing makes me swoon, all the more for the rarity it is.

I have a very different relationship with Damien Rush. He possesses one of the most outrageously over-sized egos in homoerotic wrestling, if not anywhere outside of Washington, DC. The daddy’s little rich boy backstory makes me love, love, love to hate him, and the bigger and beefier he gets, the more extravagantly puffed he becomes, and the more desperate I am to see him humbled hard. Since his early “swimmer’s build,” he’s been getting a lot of mileage out of his gorgeously thick muscles and comic book proportions. When he stomps into the ring, flexing, and his simpering, contemptuous baritone starts chugging away with silver spoon-fed self-praise and blue blood destiny for greatness, my orgasm is just a tad fiercer for it when I see him plowed under and laid waste, as in Hunkbash 17 when smooth muscle giant Vasily Volkov bashes the snot right out of him.

I haven’t quite decided what my fan-relationship is with hot bodied bro Kenny Starr yet. I mean, fuck, that body, of course. But honestly, I don’t know if my crotch aches more to see him ground into putty or doing the grinding. Ty Alexander makes a strong case for the former in Jobberpaloozer 17. Kenny’s glorious, wedgied ass exposed, nearly drowning in a pool of his own sweat, and unable to muster enough energy to lift his head off the mat is certainly a sensational use of that smoking hot body of his.

Seeing Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) take a turn on the losing end of the stick is another rare treat that leaves me just a little frustrated, honestly. Don’t get me wrong, watching a notorious badass heel undone is that much more pleasurable when said badass is a musclebound physique star with a multi-award winning bulge. The hit Mr. Joshua’s ego takes in a match like his Ring Hunks 1 battle with Aryx Quinn gets me way, way hot and bothered. But fuck it all to hell, seeing him wasted, out cold, and humiliated, and never seeing an opponent unleashing Mr. J’s not-so-secret weapon when he can’t lift a finger to defend himself makes me blow blood vessels. Come ON, Aryx! WTF?!

I’ve been starting to dabble in Thunder’s Arena again, for a change of pace, and there are just so many mouthwatering muscles to sink my teeth into! For example, Battlespace 112 grabs me hard, initially because I can’t decide if it’s silky smooth, mocha skinned surf bro Jack Beaver or mop-headed, smoldering alabaster boy Kid Thing who’s hotter. Perhaps paradoxically (or not), it’s seeing Kid Thing worked to a nub and literally out cold still standing that tips the scales his way for me. Fu-uck, we need a Kid tournament some day [makes note to self for future fantasy match].

Rio Garza. Let me just say his name and step back and watch the ages old fault lines pop open in homoerotic wrestling fandom. I’ve long been on the record that I love to hate the Mexican muscle boy precisely because he never quite managed to go from go-go boy to wrestler. I mean, he wrestled. A lot, to say the least. But I never thought he brought a whole lot more than a dizzyingly sexy body to the table. I know for a fact that at least a couple of his opponents felt the same way as I do, which explains the ferocity behind the brutal beatdowns lovely Rio took in the ring. If you’re going to be a dazzlingly sexy muscle jobber, you deserve the credit for making wasted be so deeply satisfying for fans, as he does in Hunkbash 11.

I should probably quit, but I couldn’t help myself but track down one more stunning fantasyman who comes to mind when I think of pathos in defeat. Kid Brock wrestled in a total of just 4 BG East releases, and still I obsess about him these many years later. It was the angelic babyface somehow misplaced atop his gargantuan, fierce physique. It was a whiff of greatness, like this Kid could legitimately deserve his place in the extremely exclusive ranks of Kid greats at BGE. It was that porn-ready muscle ass and those sensationally thick thighs. But, in the end, it was all that wasted promise, plowed under, destroyed, humiliated, and him leaving an epic career of homoerotic wrestling greatness just lying their on the table, just like he was just left splayed out and destroyed by the likes of Structure in Ring Wars 9. Like seriously, I think this Kid could have owned us ALL if he’d stuck around!

Such a sensationally sweet, sexy, satisfying waste to see hot bodied hunks like these laid out!

Ode to OTK

August 23, 2018 wrestlebard

0138_lg — Zip Zarella wrings the Z out of Z-Man

It’s been a long time since I composed a post devoted solely to admiring a particular wrestling hold. I’ve been recently obsessing once again over my favorite wrestling hold, the over-the-knee backbreaker.

Even the set up for this hold is sexy, as Grant Connors digs his fingers into Carson Crawford’s hot ass.

It’s such a massively dominating move. The pitcher often literally cradles the catcher like a child in his arms, clutching him across his chest, and then drops to one knee, pounding his opponent’s back across his thigh. I love the geography of this hold. The victim splayed out, his vulnerable core stretched wide, legs and upper body pressed backward such that he can’t assume the instinctive duck and cover defensive position to protect his internal organs.

Kelly King busts Kirk’s back like a boss.

I catch myself gasping in awe at high impact OTKs. There’s a raw, primal, intensely arousing aspect to watching a dominant hunk seriously pound his opponent down with authority, his knee driving viciously into the helpless stud’s spine. It’s magnificent drama when he scoops him directly back up across his chest, standing tall and hoisting the victim high to repeat the move again. And again. Total domination.

Ty’s helplessness make’s Coop’s muscle seem that much more massive.

I also also love an OTK punisher with big, bulging pecs flexing powerfully, his face hovering so close to his opponent’s muscled torso and quivering crotch. Stretched out on his back, the victim of an OTK is flattened, the topography of his physique stretched out and impotent, in contrast to the flaring shoulders and pumped pecs of his tormentor.

Mr. Joshua digs deep into Chace LaChance.

Then there are the subtle variations and innovations that dial up the inherent eroticism of this hold in a homoerotic context. The stolen moments to take advantage of the victim’s helplessness, sadistically brutalizing muscled abs and pecs. Not content to just torture his spine, the man in charge pounds fists, drives in elbows, perhaps digs his finger tips into defenseless muscle and wear him out from every angle.

Ace Aarons handles Richie’s rocks

Richie’s balls demand Mason’s attention as well.

An OTK seems paradigmatically gay (or at least bicurious) when the dominant hunk pays serious attention to that tempting bulge at the apex of his opponent’s bridge. Frankly it doesn’t often go there even in homoerotic wrestling, but every OTK seems like a head nod to those sensational moments when a wrestler leans forward and sucks his opponent’s nipple, seductively slides the palm of his hand possessively across his lower abs, and appreciatively throttles and fondles his arching cock. That’s the heart of homoerotic wrestling for me, with the purpose of the battle to determine who gets to take possession of whose body.

Calvin’s muscle melt

Mitch stiff and in agony

I’m fascinated watching muscled hunks sell this hold. Clearly some wrestlers are built a lot more for strength than flexibility. A stiff, tabletop OTK actually works for me because it looks like it hurts just that much more. When a muscle laden stud doesn’t really have much of a lower back arch to bend across his opponent’s thigh, it also just seems that much more humiliating. But there’s nothing quite as arousing as watching a flexible hunk melt into the hold, bridging dramatically, as if his muscles are draped across a hanger. The submissiveness, the giving himself over blindly to man who’s claimed his body, is golden.

My gratitude to all of the homoerotic wrestlers who have recently fed my craving for OTK hotness. For those moments when you’ve reached through your opponents legs and cupped his beefy ass in the palm of your hand, I salute you. For your graceful bridge and packed, quivering bulge gasping in anticipation of whatever is to come at the mercy of your opponent, I applaud you. I realize this hold is not exactly intuitive to pull off, and for many of you it’s downright awkward as fuck to sell, so I appreciate the gorgeous erotic art of your human sculpture just that much more.

Pride and Joy

March 30, 2018 wrestlebard2 Comments

I’ve been giving a lot in the give and take of balancing my wrestling infatuation with my day job. Not only has it taken a bite out of my opportunities to watch new wrestling, I’ve also not been keeping up with the other excellent bloggers covering the scene. So who’s covered Jonny Firestorm and Ty’s Wrestling with Pride match? I definitely defer to the judgment of eyes on the scene, but this is my take from this side of the screen.

Okay, this is fucking sexy. To start with, Ty is full on, well into beefcake territory at this point in his incredible physical transformation. It’s hard to connect the dots between his beefy, muscular, cover boy body in the Wrestling with Pride ring and his skinny, smooth, boyish vulnerability just a few years ago. Ty’s sell has always struck me as right at that line between compelling and camp, but when he struts to the ring at Wilton Manor, smirking, winking, inviting the gay crowd to appreciate his hotness, that thoroughly Ty character of his perfectly hits the sweet spot.

Ty’s possession of the pretty boy role is only that much more locked into place when Jonny arrives with his hot and hairy bear daddy belly, wearing a leather harness. I don’t know how many of the fans in the live audience follow BG East quite like you and I do, so it’s hard to tell if they recognize the set-up of, historically, one of the company’s most prolific babyface jobbers squaring off against, historically, one of the most lauded badass heels in the business. If they did understand the historical context, they might have expected a squash. If they did expect a squash, they were sorely disappointed.

Fuck, I LOVE the give and take in this match! Ty’s infamous narcissism (he does, after all, have the words “Cocky: Suck It” printed across his ass) is sensationally tasty when paired with his quickly developing ring skills. He absolutely takes it to leather daddy Jonny. There are many moments when I actually feel just a little sorry for Jonny getting fucked up and humiliated, after such a dominant career as a sadistic heel, in front of this live audience. Ty is a mean mother fucker, asserting a classically heel mix of beautifully executed wrestling and vicious, underhanded rule breaking. I’ve told Ty that I’ve longed to see him become an unmistakably dangerous competitor after serving such a long sentence in prettyboy jobber purgatory. He’s been emerging into adulthood in several matches I’ve seen over the past 9 months or so, but never as commandingly and persuasively as in this match.

And I know that there are plenty of fans who completely disagree with me, but I find a badass heel with strong notes of vulnerability one of the sexiest things ever. I love seeing Jonny struggle. I love seeing him have to fight for it. Hard. I love seeing this irrepressible head of steam he’s generated over the course of his career, plowing into, over top of, and through countless opponents like a tidal wave, sputter and stumble. Don’t tell Jonny, but frankly, I’m turned on incredibly by the sight of him suffering hard. My vote for Top Heel a few months ago joined a majority of BGE fans in catapulting Kayden Keller over top of Jonny for the first time, and for me, it’s because Kayden has perfected the seductive allure of a vulnerable heel. Jonny’s performance at Wrestling with Pride, however, could make me rethink my vote come January of next year. There’s not a thing less “heel-like” for those moments when Ty is fucking him up. I don’t subscribe to the philosophy that being a heel and executing a squash are intrinsically linked. Jonny repeatedly and convincingly turns the tables on the babyface challenger, and in entirely Jonny-style, he does more than his share of fucking his opponent up as well. But honestly, the suspense of not knowing which badass beauty is going to pull it out for the adoring gay crowd in attendance makes this bout so succulent for me.

Ty’s ultimate downfall in this match is not due to any character flaw or inadequacy on his part (and thus I love this match so much more than many matches earlier in his career). He’s a completely legitimate contender who grabs his burly opponent by the balls (literally… and the ref’s balls, for that matter), and battles to the wire in a compelling bid for victory.

And he comes up just short. And the ghosts of Christmas past come to haunt his beefcake body laid bare (well, thonged) and wasted at Jonny’s feet. I love the cameo at the beginning of the match when Ty bitches about his ex-tag team partner turned tormentor, Chase Addams, who’s been invited to give color commentary over the PA. I pop my cork at the end of the match when silver fox fantasy-daddy Shane McCall climbs in to perform the post-mortem on Ty. If you don’t follow these two on FB, you may not know that Ty has continued to talk trash at Shane ever since Shane laid waste to Ty back in his twink days. There’s a lot of value added for me seeing Shane in street clothes, mount Ty’s ass, pry him into a camel clutch, and cinch on a dog collar and leash. Please revisit my comments earlier about the gaping hole in homoerotic wrestling that needs to get filled by the likes of hot daddies like Shane (preferably going pec to pec for the daddy championship title against man-of-my-dreams Scott Williams).

Collared and crushed, Ty is served up to the front row fans in the most generous moment of Wrestling with Pride. Jonny parades his trophy-boy in front of the fans, inviting them to spank Ty’s pride and joy bubble butt. A few of them seriously get into it, which makes me less bitter toward the ones who momentarily balk at the opportunity to put a hand on Ty’s vulnerable ass shoved in their laps. The public humiliation and fan-participation-spanking again harkens me back to my favorite live wrestling match (in which Shane also makes a post-match appearance!). It also almost makes up for no one (NO ONE!?) accepting Elite Eliot’s invitation to check his gorgeously packed pink trunks for weapons in that earlier match.

0308_lg — Ty lives to regret getting “Suck It” printed on his ass

I feel like there was a tragically missed opportunity to have Chase join Shane in doling out some satisfying Ty humbling. For that matter, can we just consider the magnificence of a Chase & Shane (Shane & Chase?) tag team? I can’t think of a sexier daddy-boy wrestling partnership since BBW slapped the dog collar on Shane and they showed up in the same corner to pry apart and ball gag another daddy-boy tag team to victory.

Well done Ty and Jonny (and Shane, and Chase) for making this match multifaceted and engrossing. So many moving parts could, I’m sure, have sent this train flying off the tracks. Instead, this was the sensationally gayest, hottest, most homoerotic match of the night. And this was Wrestling with Pride, so that’s saying something!

Our Man Inside

March 8, 2018 wrestlebard7 Comments

A few years ago, I mentioned in a post that I have a particular fondness for candid glimpses of homoerotic wrestlers. I love seeing them when they aren’t “on,” when they’re obviously just being the beautiful men they are in those moments between climbing into the ring to rip each other apart. A few wrestlers have openly shared with me their private camera rolls from wrestling shoots, but BG East (the source of most of those), officially embargoed me before that could go on for long. My sources dried up, and rumor had it that some of the wrestlers involved were sorely and corporally punished for sharing the insider information with “the press.” And then, quietly and mysteriously, I received my first batch of smuggled contraband from an anonymous source who I have come to know only as OMI, Our Man Inside.

I always wonder if my latest batch of OMI treasure will be the last, and the Boss will sniff out the mole and squash him like a bug. I take it as testimony to the size of OMI’s balls and the apparent affection he must have for me that he tempts fate by feeding my adoring obsession with peaking behind the curtain.

I’ve posted precious little about the recent live wrestling show BG East produced for the Fort Lauderdale Pride event last month because, 1) I couldn’t get off work to go down and see it in person, and 2) I’m bitter about #1. Somehow, OMI knew how envious I am of all of the social media celebrations of that event, and like manna from heaven, again I’ve been fed some dizzyingly delightful snapshots from something other than the “official” camera.

Clearly, the event was a who’s who of BG East celebrities. I have no problem with acknowledging that even the pics of these gorgeous hunks fully clothed gets me hard. The fraternal camaraderie in their playful smiles and warm embraces highlights one thing I love about BG East: the “esprit de corps” as several wrestlers I’ve talked to have named it. Even when they do their best to rip each other’s balls off in competition, once egos and bodies have been tested and placed in their proper hierarchy, most of these wrestlers clearly enjoy the community formed by what unites them, namely, a passion for wrestling.

To be honest, I can sit on OMI caches way too long because I want to obsess about every single photo in detail. In order not to fall into that trap with this incredibly tasty OMI collection from the Pride event, I’ll post most of them without comment, but not without deep appreciation and arousal. But, of course, I will comment on a few that grab me by the balls just right.

First of all, look at the assembly of hotness! Fuck, so many names, so many muscles, so many immediate associations in my mind with wrestling matches that I’ve written about and gotten off on repeatedly. There are exactly 5 faces I don’t recognize. Identify everyone in this shot and you can be queen for a day here on the blog.

These assembled shots from the Pride event raise so many summary questions. Who is the guy in the front row snapping a photo of Ty’s sweaty ass as Jonny works him over outside the ring? What sadistic, sexy machinations is Kid Vicious working there in the shadows? Where can I get a leopard print suit!?

I have no doubt that OMI knows exactly what he’s doing to me by sending me shots like this of three of the sexiest wrestlers of all time who I have unapologetically fawned over repeatedly in the pages of this blog. Seeing Scott Williams, Shane McCall, and Brad Rochelle embracing and smiling brightly blows my mind. The time since these stunning wrestlers were last seen in the ring has done nothing but make them sexier. How is there not a Daddy Division at BGE, to scratch that itch, that I know for a fact I’m not the only one who has, to see classic wrestling stars like this back in action? Shane has been quite clear in his interview with me a couple of years back, as well as ongoing comments since then, that he’s still nursing an appreciative rivalry with hot daddy Scott. How is this not a thing!? Look at Scott’s bronzed, bulging deltoid muscle there and explain how the the fuck he isn’t starring in a Returning Classics Championship tournament or, at the very least, his own muscle daddy Wrestler Spotlight!?

Refraining from commenting at length on every one of these photos is killing me, but I know this post will never get published if I start. However, the questions that come to mind in this collection include how is there not an UltraFight 2.5 (The Rematch) in production right now? Exactly how did Brad and KL manage to bury the hatchet after Brad was last seen shoving the Boss’ head in a toilet!? And can someone please tell Shane that if he’s going to build pecs like that, he is morally obligated to get his hotness back into the ring, preferably starting by settling that score he has with Scott?

I sort of think that OMI may know me better than anyone I’ve never met. Not only does he satiate my lust for classic homoerotic wrestling stars, he knows how much I also adore catching those first glimpses of hot, young, aspiring beauties. This pic of assembled youthful hunks makes me desperately hopeful that the known wrestling stars there (Kayden, Ash, Noah, Tommy, Kieran) interspersed among ridiculously pretty young faces I’m not familiar with, hints at some fresh, meaty newbies on the horizon. The backward baseball cap duo have GOT to be the most mouthwatering tag team I’ve never seen in action. Blond Ambition there on the left, the one with the lips, looks ripe for a beating. And holy fuck, Kayden , with those arms, wearing those glasses, is making me swoon. I’d like to order up a 2-on-1 battle in which Tommy and Noah team up to take on Kayden, and, for the record, I’m putting all my money on Kayden.

Again, how NOT to comment for the next 3 months about each and everyone of these hot shots? I know from the poster that Elite Eliot was on the card for the Pride event, but fuck me, those lickable legs of his make me ready to beg to see him in the BG East ring for myself (please tell me this is true!). Is it possible that Ace Aarons got his crack at rubbing the shit-eating grin off of Kirk Donahue’s face? Who in the hell are the too achingly pretty young hotties that Kirk has his arm around, and how long did it take for them to get annoyed by Kirk and double-team his better-than-mediocre ass? Why am I NEVER around to be invited to join in the sexy pool parties!?

As always, OMI, I owe you more than I will ever be able to repay. Keep the smiles, and the dimples, and the beautiful men who make homoerotic wrestling what it is, coming!

And the Winner Is…

January 17, 2018 wrestlebardLeave a comment

Congratulations to the winners of the BG East Besties for 2017! It was a fabulous year in homoerotic wrestling, and all of the nominees demonstrated the deep bench that BG East can rightfully boast. Some of my picks earned the most votes overall. Some didn’t. They all (but one) get nothing but respect from me. It’s certainly not the first time I’ve seen evidence that my tastes intersect and diverge with other homoerotic wrestling fans. Happily, there’s plenty for all of us to enjoy, and awards or not, my sincere thanks go out to the beautiful men in front of and behind the camera that make BG East a leader in wrestling for a gay audience.

Sexiest Match: Sexiest Match – Ty Alexander vs. Bruno LaBestia (Ringwars 28)

Best Mat Battle: Austin Cooper vs. Christian Taylor (Undagear 28)

The biggest upset of the year (not a category) had to be Austin Cooper getting owned by Christian Taylor

Best Ring Match: Cole Cassidy vs. Joshua Goodman (Ringwars 26)

This hold alone is already the stuff of legend

Best Squash: Lane Hartley vs. Kirk Donahue (Demolition 22)

Best Submissions: Kayden Keller vs. Richie Douglas (Kayden’s Spotlight)

Kayden masters the beautiful art of submission

Hottest Liplock: Christian Taylor vs. Mason Brooks (Bedroom Brawl 3)

Mason aids Christian in remaining the reigning kissing champion

Best Overall Match: Cole Cassidy vs. Joshua Goodman (Ringwars 26)

Top Heel: Kayden Keller

Kayden for the upset win over both Jonny and Kid Karisma!

Top Babyface: Richie Douglas

Richie beats back a challenge from Kirk Donahue

Jobber of the Year: Kirk Donahue

Fuck, I hate this jobber for beating my boy Drake Marcos

Debut of the Year: Zip Zarella

Zip wasn’t my top pick, but you get no arguments from me

Best Abs: Kid Karisma

Kid Karisma beats runner-up Mitch Colby for Best Abs

Best Bulge: Joshua Goodman

I’m thrilled to see Mr. Joshua’s bulge beat last year’s winner, Kirk, to the curb

Best Butt: Kid Karisma

Despite Ty’s social media campaign, he couldn’t rip the title away from the perennial favorite glutes of Kid Karisma

Best Body: Kid Karisma

0902_lg — BG East fans agreed with me that it just doesn’t get any better than this!

The Best 4Hire

January 9, 2018January 8, 2018 wrestlebardLeave a comment

Wrestler4Hire has ventured into the year-end fan poll territory. They have 10 categories for you to choose from. You can register your vote here. I’m less familiar with the full catalog at W4H, so my recommendations are likely less informed than many other W4H fans. But you know me. I always have opinions. Here are your W4H Best of 2017 choices.

Best Heel

Guido Genatto
Ronnie Pearl
Nick Justice
Dr. X
Jobe Zander
Garrett Thomas
Dick Rick
Lon Dumont

I’ve seen all of these contenders in action, and of course I have my favorites. But it will likely come as no surprise to regular readers that I’m voting for Lon Dumont.

Best Jobber

Black Starr
Zach Reno
Cam Zagucci
Alex Oliver
Jonny Jober
Tyler Royce
Cal Bennett
Chet Chastain

I have seen all of these guys, though not in 2017 W4H matches. Just going with my gut, though, I’m always a big fan of Alex Oliver. His gorgeous ass gets my vote.

Top Newcomer

CJ Renik
Joey Nux
Christian Thorn
Cali Boy
Scrappy
Jax Brewer
Tyler Royce
Marco Thunder
Jaxton Wheeler
Ricky Vegas
Trenton Ducati
Blake Starr
Jayden Mayne
Austin Tyler
Elite Eliot

First of all… 15 nominations!? There’s some executive leadership needed in order to get this behemoth under control. I have not seen all of these guys (there are fucking 15 of them, after all), but I have seen most. It’s a close all for me between Marco and Elite Eliot. I’ll probably vote for Marco, though.

Favorite Ring Match

Ace Owens vs. Elite Eliot
Dashing Dustin vs. Dr. X
Cameron vs. Ace Owens vs. Nick Justice
Tyler Royce vs. Hugh Hunter
Cameron vs. Ty Alexander
Cal Bennett vs. Elite Eliot
Marco Thunder vs. Rendell Zebu
Tyler Royce vs. Cam Zagucci
Cal Bennett vs. Brad Barnes
Elite Eliot vs. Garrett Thomas
Nathan FX vs. Garrett Thomas
Cameron vs. Jonny Jobber

I saw only a couple of these matches, so my opinion is based on incomplete data and a lot of just who I like, rather than a studied comparison of the specific matches. With that in mind, I’ll vote for Ty and Cameron.

Favorite Mat Match

Nathan VX vs. Cal Bennett
Cameron vs. Jaxton Wheeler
Chase LaChance vs. Black Starr
Jobe Zander vs. Marco Thunder
Cam Zagucci vs. Austin Tyler
Cal Bennett vs. Zacky Darlin
Cameron vs. Jax Brewer
Tyler Royce vs. Jobe Zander

Holy shit, I saw none of these matches. I’ve got nothing worthwhile to contribute to your deliberation. Just based on who I like, I’ll vote for Cameron and Jax Brewer.

Best Butt

Cameron
Chace LaChance
Marco Thunder
Braad Barnes
Austin Cooper
Z-Man
Jax Brewer
Tyler Royce
Cal Bennett

I’m supposed to say company CEO Cameron, but I’m going to say Marco.

Hottest Body

Cal Bennett
Chace LaChance
Marco Thunder
Scrappy
Blake Starr
KARN
Austin Cooper
Elite Eliot
Braden Charron
Ricky Vegas

Okay, so finally I have a ton of reasonably well-informed opinions. Chace has won this title over at BG East two years ago. I’m seriously hot for Marco, Scrappy, and Eliot. But I’m voting for Marco.

Best Smile

Cam Zagucci
Matty O’Boy
Blake Starr
Cameron
Lane Hartley
Austin Cooper
Zacky Darlin
Cal Bennett
Marco Thunder
Nick Sparx

I like this category a lot. Hands down, most crotch-warming smile belongs to Blake Starr in this bunch.

Best Arms

Zach Altovito
Jax Brewer
Z-Man
Austin Cooper
Christian Thorn
KARN
Maverick
Braden Charron
Cal Bennett

Another great category. Considering forearms as well as upper arms, I’m casting my vote for Jax Brewer. Fuck, I love his arms.

Future Champion

Garrett Thomas
Joey Nux
Ronnie Pearl
Jax Brewer
Austin Cooper
Marco Thunder
Cal Bennett
BradBarnes
Ace Owens
Scrappy
Elite Eliot

I’m not really sure how to interpret this category. Future champion of what? Does W4H have a championship in contention? Future indy pro champion material? So many questions. The validity of the question is weak, but I’ll still vote for a burning favorite wrestler here, Elite Eliot.

And the Nominees Are…

January 7, 2018January 6, 2018 wrestlebard1 Comment

I’ve learned that discussing how I vote in the BG East Besties is dangerous territory. The longer I’ve been blogging about homoerotic wrestling, the more I’ve grown to know many of the hard working men who make it happen. They never begrudge me my vote, but when I handicap the field and disclose how I cast my ballot, I’ve needed to smooth over some ruffled feathers and tend to friendships at times. So here are some special instructions for the BG East wrestlers I know and have affection for: don’t take any of this too seriously. We love you all. This is way more about the fans than it is about you.

With that preamble out of the way, let’s dig into the Bestie nominations posted on Friday. As opposed to my own personal categories of favorites that I started sharing yesterday, these are my thoughts on those that BG East has nominated for their awards. I don’t see when polls will close, but I’ll try to make this quick so that it may inform any undecided voters looking for tips.

1. Sexiest Match

Instantly, I’m navigating those complicated waters with the first category. I’ve met six of the wrestlers involved in the six nominated matches and interviewed most of those. There’s a spectacular double debut match that burned holes in my retina it was so hot. None of these were misses, but some hit the spot just a little more squarely than others for me. The nominees are…

Ty Alexander vs. Steve Mason (Wrestleshack 21)
Drake Marcos vs. Goren Ford (X-Fights 45)
Ty Alexander vs. Bruno LaBestia (Ringwars 28)
Tommie Hawk vs. Noah Samson (Undagear 28)
Kayden Keller vs. Leon Cyrus (X-Fights 44)
Cage Thunder vs. Mitch Colby (Motel Madness 14)

When I sort through who to vote for sexiest match, I look for a match where both wrestlers express explicit, mutual lust. Kissing is nearly essential. Naked bodies and fully engaged cocks are a major plus. I want to believe that the action is stimulating the wrestlers as much as it is me. Of these nominees, the match that did this best is, arguably, Ty Alexander vs. Steve Mason in Wrestleshack 21. It hits all of my buttons, and the big (HUGE) reveal of Steve’s crotch monster is epic. My fall back option is the astonishingly sexy match between Tommie Hawk and Noah Samson in Undagear 28. Since Ty is splitting the vote this year, I’m guessing that someone else may take the popular vote, but honestly, I don’t even have a good guess as to who that will be.

2. Best Mat Battle

The best mat category is probably the most competitive for me this year. I met 5 of the hunks in these nominated matches last summer and was delighted by them all. When it comes to evaluating mat matches, I look for competitive, intimate, battles with long held moves and close ups of exquisite anguish. I like to see amateur moves translated into a gay, pro context. I prefer the serious sell, with big egos convincing me that they want it, and that the final, humiliating victory is up for grabs. The nominees this year are…

Kirk Donahue vs. Carter Alexander (Backyard Brawls 9)
Cage Thunder vs. Mitch Colby (Motel Madness 14)
Tino Valencia vs. Ski Vance (Catch Weight 8)
Austin Cooper vs. Christian Taylor (Undagear 28)
Calvin Haynes vs. Nino Leone (Catch Weight 8)
Ace Aarons vs. Ash DeLeon (Mat Rookies 3)

So much to choose from! I’m bitterly torn between Austin Cooper vs. Christian Taylor in Undagear 28 and Ace Aarons vs. Ash DeLeon in Mat Rookies 3. My hunch is that when it comes time to pull the lever, I’ll go with the shockingly intense Undagear match with that sensationally surprising ending. My hunch is that the popular vote will swing to Austin and Christian as well, as two of the popular headliners that regularly draw the fans (an advantage over Ace and Ash). Cage and Mitch’s match is, however, already the stuff of legends. But if you really like shocking endings, Calvin and Nino’s battle is soooo sweetly surprising. Damn. This category is tough for me.

3. Best Ring Match

In judging the quality of a ring match, I’m looking for a match that exploits the context. I want a match that treats pro wrestling with the respect it deserves. I like to see power and speed, with a strong narrative and larger than life characters. The nominees for best ring match are…

Joey King vs. Zip Zarella (Ring Kings)
Jonny Firestorm vs. Kirby Stone (Pros in Private 11)
Kid Karisma vs. Jobe Zander (Bulge Battles 1)
Kid Karisma vs. Ethan Andrews (Heel Bash 2)
Cole Cassidy vs. Joshua Goodman (Ringwars 26)
Toney Rico vs. Chase Addams (Ringwars 28)

Another highly competitive slate! Kid Karisma may split his vote. My vote will almost certainly go with Toney Rico vs. Chase Addams in Ringwars 28 this year (see my review for all of the reasons). Kid K and Jobe is awfully close, though. Jonny vs. Kirby has got to be the best ring wrestling of the year, but the narrative isn’t as colorful as Toney and Chase’s. Cole and Joshua put together the most colorful characters and delightful drama, but the wrestling isn’t as pro-forward. My very tentative guess as to who the majority will break for is Jonny and Kirby, mostly based on the hardcore Jonny fanatics out there.

4. Best Squash

My least favorite category. Though I know a lot of you love a good squash. I guess when squashes work for me, I have a reason to both particularly want to see the victim suffer and the dominator dish it out. I also need to be convinced by the stud on the receiving end. Squashes can become boring for me, so the guy getting squashed needs to seriously convince me that he’s hurting, and he’s not phoning it in. This year’s nominees are…

Kayden Keller vs. Carter Alexander (Wrestler Spotlight: Kayden)
Thrash vs. El Favorito (Masked Mayhem 12)
Kid Karisma vs. Reese Wells (Ringwars 27)
Lane Hartley vs. Kirk Donahue (Demolition 22)
Kid Vicious vs. Devon Britt-Darby (Gut Bash 13)
Cap Landon vs. Kelly King (Knock Outs 3)

My choice is Kayden vs. Carter in Kayden’s Wrestler Spotlight. While I do love watching Kayden dig back from a deficit, I never grow tired of watching him plow pretty boys under. I’ve also had a craving to watch Carter getting hurt ever since he let slip in his match with Kid Karisma that he not-so-secretly (anymore) enjoys getting his hair pulled as he’s dominated. For a squash, Kayden keeps the pace intense, and Carter suffers exquisitely. He has this choking, half-laugh sob that makes my crotch twitch. A close second place in this category for me is Thrash vs. El Favorito, though El Favorito has more offense than I typically credit to a squash. Same goes for Kid K vs. Reese. I’ll guess the majority will break either for Kayden and Carter or Lane and Kirk, depending on whether the tide breaks for the leaning-to-erotic or the hardcore indy pro vibe.

5. Best Submissions

Somehow making this category plural clears up my confusion about how to evaluate it. I’m using a standard of making my pick based on the number, variety, and creativity of submissions in a given match. The nominees for the match with the best submissions this year are…

Austin Cooper vs. Christian Taylor (Undagear 28)
Tino Valencia vs. Skip Vance (Catch Weight 8)
Kayden Keller vs. Richie Douglas (Kayden’s Wrestling Spotlight)
Jonny Firestorm vs. Kirby Stone (Pros in Private 11)
Joey King vs. Zip Zarella (Ring Kings)
Chase Addams vs. Charlie Evans (Ring Rookies 5)

By a long shot, for this category I’m going with Jonny vs. Kirby in Pros in Private 11. The submissions fly nearly frantically, except everything is polished, exacting, and precise. Both of these pros are marvelously talented, and they bring out the best (and worst) in each other. It’s just an added bonus that Kirby’s ass drives me crazy. When it comes to the rest of the field, my next choice is a tie between Chase and Charlie and Joey and Zip. I won’t be surprised if Jonny and Kirby win this category, but if not, I suspect it could swing Austin and Christian’s way.

6. Hottest Liplock

When I’m deciding which wrestling liplock is hottest, I’m looking for passion. I prefer liplocks harshly ambivalent, with equal parts rage and lust. The nominees this year are as follows…

Christian Taylor vs. Mason Brooks (Bedroom Brawl 3)
Calvin Haynes vs. Nino Leone (Catch Weight 8)
Ash DeLeon vs. Ace Aarons (Mat Rookies 3)
Lauden Sevior vs. Drake Marcos (Undagear 27)
Nino Leone vs. Bruno LaBestia (Wrestleshack 21)
Ty Alexander vs. Steve Mason (Wrestleshack 21)

I’m solidly voting for Ash and Ace in Mat Rookies 3. Talk about a gorgeous concoction of passionate lust and passionate aggression! Damn. A runner-up option for me would be Lauden and Drake. I don’t know who the popular vote will follow, but if I had to guess, I’d say Ty and Steve, based mostly on Ty’s get-out-the-vote credentials.

7. Best Overall Match

This category seems self-explanatory. I feel obligated to swing toward one of the “Best of” matches I’ve already picked, though there are a couple of matches in this category that weren’t nominated above, which makes open to a dark horse pick in my mind. In any case, this is the slate of nominees:

Cole Cassidy vs. Joshua Goodman (Ringwars 26)
Jonny Firestorm vs. Kirby Stone (Pros in Private 11)
Ty Alexander vs. Bruno LaBestia (Ringwars 28)
Austin Cooper vs. Christian Taylor (Undagear 28)
Kid Karisma vs. Jobe Zander (Bulge Battles 1)
Kid Karisma vs. Reese Wells (Ringwars 27)

So yes to all of the above, but of these options, I’m going with Kid K vs. Jobe in Bulge Battles 1. This was a sensational match against two astonishingly accomplished homoerotic wrestling veterans. The suspense is fantastic. The action is graphic. The personalities are over the top in a way that only the likes of Kid K and Jobe can quite pull off. Second place for me is somewhere between Cole and Mr. Joshua, Jonny and Kirby, and Austin and Christian. My hunch is that Kid K splits his vote again and neither of his matches take the category. Instead, I think Cole and Mr. Joshua might pull of an upset, based on the fevered pleasure both Alex and I have for that match, though again, there’s Ty and his aggressive get-out-the-vote campaign.

So that’s my take on the first half of the ballot. What’s yours?

Woah.

November 19, 2017November 19, 2017 wrestlebard7 Comments

For months, Ty Alexander has been telling me that he’s a new man. Tired of not being taken seriously, relegated to the jobber heap, the comic relief, Ty has repeatedly dropped hints that he’s undergone a transformation. When I interviewed him at BG East this summer, there was evidence at hand. He was the only wrestler who sat for his interview shirtless, repeatedly flexing his lightly hairy pecs and smirking when he caught me staring at them. More than just the obvious muscle mass, though, there was something edgier about Ty. He’s less cocky but more confident somehow.

So I was eager to see his recent match against the lovely little newbie Steve Mason. It had to be recorded this summer. Ty was in that same shape, with that same confidence to go with the meaty, flexing, lightly hairy pecs. They silently get down to business and immediately Ty outmuscles the tasty newbie. With sheer force of will, he presses Steve into position. He manipulates the newbie’s muscled body commandingly. He spanks his ass and crotch-rips the rookie’s legs open wide in a spladle. It’s assertive and decisive. It’s not nearly so self-congratulatory and self-absorbed as the old Ty.

It’s that much more shocking when Steve outmaneuvers the upperclassman and locks down a figure-4, smothering Ty’s face in the newbie’s ass. He gets the first submission, and most shocking of all, it isn’t because Ty was showboating. It isn’t because Ty was distracted by his own beauty. It isn’t because Ty got comically cocky. It’s just because Steve earned it. There’s something more compelling and suspenseful about this match than Ty’s previous outings, not because he’s suddenly a bulldozing heel, but because giving or taking, it’s honest and raw without the glitz and strut. “Lucky,” Ty snarls, echoes of his less responsible, more petulant prior incarnation rising up defensively. “That’s not luck,” Steve smirks. “That’s skill.”

I expect to see big things from “little” Steve Mason

I like to think of myself as a connoisseur of young vine wrestling performances. I like to swish them around in my mouth and see if I can taste what future harvests may become with time maturity and experience. I live Steve. I like his look. I like his voice. I enjoyed the opportunity to meet him briefly, mostly in passing this summer, and he stands out in a crowd. In this match, he’s the first to squeeze his opponent’s balls. He’s fierce and determined, with a no nonsense attitude that’s the flip side of the smart-ass, sexy playfulness I caught a glimpse of behind camera. He’s beautiful in a demanding way, like he insists on being seen, studied, and appraised.

Steve submits to Ty headscissors, with a ball claw chaser, moments after scoring his first submission. “Does that feel lucky?” Ty taunts. Steve is pissed. I love that bitter edge. His ego got bruised, and hedigs into the action again with an earnestness that’s delightful. He’s also a surprisingly adept mat wrestler, and this plays out as honestly competitive. There are no fewer than 10 hot, decisive submissions traded back and forth, with the winner finishing the tally with a 6-4 advantage. But the numbers disguise the intensely erotic quality of the action.

Their singlets were more for seduction and show than function anyway, so there’s little wonder they get torn off. In the heat of battle, both boys can’t keep their hands off of each other’s crotches, but in Ty’s case, he also can’t keep his eyes and his lips off of the newbie’s package. Stripped to a purple thong, there’s a leviathan lurking just beneath the surface, responding as if with a mind of it’s own to Ty’s growing infatuation. Ty adds to his tally with an OTK backbreaker, sliding his hand inside and checking for stolen goods in all of that massively packed baggage.

It is most definitely not your average debut when Steve slides Ty into face-to-crotch headscissors and lets that swelling, mountainous bulge do all the talking. Ty chokes on the beast, kicking and fighting, until demandingly Steve grabs the back of his opponent’s head and pulls Ty’s face pressed even tighter into his now bouncing behemoth. “Looks like you like it down there,” Steve observes objectively, noting that Ty isn’t fighting it. He’s just groaning in pleasure. Finally gasping for air, Ty taps out.

Ty sends a message to the haters and doubters.

Lean, pretty little Steve starts getting buried under fast at this point, as Ty kicks it into a gear I never knew he had before. I’m sure it’s at least in part due to this new transformation Ty’s been telling me about. He doesn’t choke in the clutch. He outmuscles and outhustles his new plaything, with perfectly measured elements of bullying and erotic delight. Ty tells a whole new story, one built on superior skill, experience, and power.

There are phenomenally big, pendulous, HUGE things yet to cum for Steve Mason!

But I have to think at least a little of what motivates Ty to new heights is the truly remarkable sledgehammer hanging between Steve’s legs. When Ty unleashes the beast, there’s an audible thump as the monster slaps the mat. I’m restricted from showing you pictures (sign into Arena for the photographic evidence, or buy this DVD to watch the leviathan in motion). But it should say something to regular readers when I report that I’m just a bit at a loss for words to convey the magnitude of this debut. I take back and heartily apologize for referring to him as “little” Steve, because that word simply can’t stick once his bazooka comes out to play. “Woah. Impressive,” Ty makes the understatement of the year.

Ty tastes an honest, no shenanigans victory

Steve even manages to keep wrestling for just a bit after he’s been stripped naked, which is a feat to behold. But like I said, this is Ty’s story to tell, and once they sort out who “wins,” they make out furiously and put both guns to blazing. Indeed, this is a whole new Ty, and I’m excited to see what new ground he breaks with this newly built muscle and new found attitude. And as for all of you Best Bulge contenders, move over and make room for the most jaw dropping debut I think I’ve ever seen. No, you need to move over farther. Farther. Steve’s contender needs a whole lot of room!

“It’s like an orgy all day long”

September 22, 2017December 19, 2022 wrestlebard2 Comments

I admit to having quickly developed an infatuation with Chase Addams. I’ve indulged that infatuation with conducting now three interviews, all for a rookie wrestler with just that same number of published matches. There are many elements to what intrigues and seduces me about the Charming One. Of course there’s the hot, lean body and those oft-mentioned nipples. You don’t have to scratch beneath my surface far to know that any openly gay wrestler who seriously loves professional wrestling will hold my attention. He wrestles an excellent story, too. But there’s still more that keeps me coming back for more. So little wonder, given the opportunity, I sat Charming Chase down at BG East during my visit this summer and put him on the record and on audio this time.

In the first portion of our conversation, I learned a little about what a typical day of wrestling for BG East looks like for Chase. He discussed that breakout moment when wrestlers he’s crushed on from afar have returned the respect and interest. And Chase and I discuss which newbie BG East wrestler he and I (and apparently a broad swath of fans) currently hate on most.

Chase Addams Interview – Part 1:

Chase2 — Chase struts his stuff in Bard-approved gear

As our conversation continued, Chase offered his take on what it’s like to be surrounded by smoking hot gay wrestlers roaming the grounds of BG East all at one time (from which the title of this post comes). And Chase gives some insight into what it’s like to go all out to pry an opponent apart piece by piece, and then find yourself hanging out between the matches at a later date.

Chase Addams Interview – Part 2:

Finally, Chase gave me a glimpse into the headspace it takes for him to prepare for a match. We speculate on which merit badges you can earn at a taping as we explore an extended metaphor of BG East to summer camp. We conclude with attempting to speculate how it could be possible to oversell the promise, potential, and pure wrestling entertainment value of Chase Addams.

Chase: “I’ve got to find a new way to make this innovative and to make this interesting.”

Chase: “Ace Aarons… *he’s* going to be there!? And he wants to wrestle me!?”

0130_lg — Chase: My first match “was an overnight viral thing.”

Chase: [On seeing Charlie Evans after they wrestled in Ring Rookies 5] “I think I could have broken his neck and come back and he’d still make eye contact with me. He’s just that kind of person.”

unnamed — Chase: “It’s like an orgy all day long.”

Chase: “I’m not high on my own hype. I just know what I’m capable of. I’m just that good.”

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