It’s awards season time! I know of a few fans of homoerotic wrestling (and quite a few wrestlers, as well) that despise the year-end awards rigamarole. I, on the other hand, take probably too much pleasure in it, mostly for the excuse it gives me to pour over videos and photos of hot hunks who turned my crank over the past 12 months. BG East just posted their ballot for their besties. I just noticed that Cameron is following in BG East’s footsteps with a year-end awards call for fan voting this year. Alex does his personal best-ofs the industry. Joe has his lists of tops. Keeping with my annual tradition (started last year), I’m wading into the pre-awards season with my personal infatuation with some categories that, inexplicably, no one else seems to pay nearly enough attention to for my tastes. First up, I climb onto my ongoing soapbox about legs.
Honestly, it astounds me how precious little attention is paid to considering who has the sexiest legs in this business. I adore powerful, shapely, muscled legs for their aesthetics and their integral role in making homoerotic wrestling happen. Scissors. Leg locks. Scissors. Kicks. Scissors. Hot legs are an essential component to the sexiest wrestling matches. Yet again, I must register my formal complaint against the industry photographers who continue to snap those pin-up boy shots of scorching hot wrestlers cut off mid-quads or higher. Sure, some close ups on a sexy upper body are lovely, but absolutely ignoring everything below the waist is criminal! As an aficionado of wrestlers’ legs, I could generate a much longer list (see honorable mentions below), but I’ll mostly stick to my top 3 favorite pair of tree trunks to crush their way through 2018.
My third place pick for best legs goes to the gargantuan pillars on Zach Altovito. I watched him wrestle for the first time over at Muscle Domination Wrestling this year, and his quads stole the show. He also put in an appearance at Wrestler4Hire. Of all of the wrestlers currently competing, I’d most pop my cork to see an opponent worship Zach’s monster quads. His MDW match against Joey Justice comes close with Joey forced to oil the big man all over, but but I’m wanting to see some serious, slack jawed worship of those beasts. Zach’s granite pillars deserve nothing less.
In second place comes the international man of mystery, BG East’s masked punisher Thrash. Fuck, I’m loving this masked heel more and more every time I see him wrestle. I want to know his backstory. I want to know for sure if Thrash is getting as turned on by dominating his opponents as I think he is. But most of all, I want to drag my tongue from big toe to crotch and back again. Thrash’s legs are devastatingly gorgeous. The aesthetics are phenomenal, with his thick, shapely calves perfectly balanced with his buttery, beautifully built upper legs. His quads are nowhere nearly as thick as Zach’s, but they’re about twice as beautiful and alluring for my tastes as a result of proportion, shape and balance. Thrash drives me fucking insane, and my hope for 2018 is to see an opponent appreciate his hotness even half as much as I do.
Top honors for Best Legs of 2017 is a surprise to me, frankly. I haven’t written about gorgeous centerfold Austin Tyler before on the pages of this blog, so I fully admit to how strange it is to see him skyrocket into first place for a year-end call up like this. However, in doing the extensive research I do for these awards, I kept coming back to Austin’s magnificently gorgeous legs. Joe has been crushing on him from the beginning, and Alex credits Austin with bringing him back to UCW, but it took my background work for this post to convince me that I need to see much, much more of Austin, starting with his sweaty thighs. I’ve watched him in action at Wrestler4Hire, and clearly, like Alex, I need to reinvest in UCW to study this award winning physique in more detail. If anything, Austin’s lower body development is disproportionately massive in contrast with his hot, tight, tanned upper body. But this award is about the best legs, and holy fuck, Austin Tyler’s got them.
There are so many more sexy legs out there than I can squeeze into a top 3 list like this. So I just have to mention the bevy of beautiful legs that deserve to be very honorably mentioned for their appearances in 2017: Kid Karisma (BG East), Kevin James (MDW, aka Tank at Thunder’s Arena), Eagle (Thunder’s Arena), Mr. Joshua Goodman (BG East), Dolf (Thunder’s Arena), Damien Rush (MDW, BG East). Van Skyler (BG East) Steel (Thunder’s Arena), Payton Meadows (BG East).
2 thoughts on “Best Legs”
I thought for sure you’d have Mitch Colby in your top 3.
But he didn’t even make honorable mention, Bard.
Of course I love Mitch’s… everything. Clearly a gross oversight not to give him a mention. However, I stick with my top 3.