I’ve been so busy with the holidays that I’ve grown tardy with my pick for December’s homoerotic wrestler of the month. BGE came out with a boatload of catalog 85 new releases to vie for our affections, of which all three Matmen 21 matches (D’Amato v Reid, Colby v Riley, and Goodman v Stanton) have wrestlers with a shot at a favorite-of-the-month nod just about any day. Backyard Brawls 7 shines an adoring spotlight on Denny Cartier and newcomer lean-n-mean Attila Dynasty. Motel Madness UK: New Breed gets legitimate credibility for the -of-the-month club for my growing infatuation with furry Sasha and wrestling kink spokesman Ashley Ryder. And I have to mention that I love the look of both Joah Bindao and smoking new face, MJ Vergara from Ringwars 18. Thunder’s Arena definitely has boys in the running this month, including Zack, Uno, and Frank the Tank for their contributions in Battle of the Male Models (1 & 2), and the unique candidates for homoerotic wrestler of the month in Santa and his Evil Elf. Rock Hard Wrestling has four worthy contenders for the title, including Travis Storm, Max Powers, Cody Nelson and Chris Cox. I’m sure I’ve forgotten someone, and it seems a crying shame to have to pick only one out of this excellent field. But they don’t pay me for self-pity (okay, so no one pays me at all for any of this…), so I’m just going to call it like I see it:

I know, I know. You were totally expecting me to say Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!). I’ve gushed so much about Mr. Joshua’s fantastic story development in Matmen 21 that I just feel like someone else needs the light of day apart from Mr. J and his concession to be the object of body worship and to wrestle with his suitor to see if Randy Stanton has what it takes to tame and claim Mr. J’s package. Frankly, shockingly, the mind-blowing rock hard muscle ass of Santa from Thunder’s Arena nearly propelled the jolly saint into my -of-the-month title (who’d have thought!?). And Travis Storm from Rock Hard Wrestling is going to have to get some special title of his own for now two standout rookie performances that are raising the bar at RHW. But if I’m truthful with myself, and with you, it’s Denny’s turn for the title.

Watching Denny’s smooth moves in Backyard Brawls 7 against a serious rookie competitor triggered both crazy lust and profound respect from me. There aren’t many homoerotic wrestlers currently in circulation who possess the mat wrestling credibility that he has, as far as I’m concerned. When Atilla starts talking trash almost immediately in Backyard Brawls 7, Denny crouches low and hikes up his baggy shorts, bouncing from foot to foot and looking like someone’s just put dessert on the table. Everything about him delivers the singular message that Denny is a mat opponent to be taken very, very seriously.

When he stretches out the rookie and strums Attila’s six pack like an acoustic guitar, Denny begins to add “homoerotic” to that awesome wrestling credibility of his. Peeling down to their briefs, the rookie reveals brief, flashy, lime green low-risers with a shiny fashion plate. All-business-Denny, on the other hand, sports relatively demure mid-rise undergear grays, and there’s just something about them that are about 3.5 times sexier than the rookie’s flash. His thick hairy legs and gorgeous round ass probably contribute to the math, but it’s also the cocky, self-assured lack of a need for any additional sparkle that makes Denny absolutely shine in my book.

I was so pleased to see Cage Thunder call out Denny as his current wrestler-infatuation in his interview with Joe at Ringside at Skull Island. Now that would be a match of the decade! But I adamantly insist that either Cage Thunder’s mask or Denny’s trunks would absolutely have to be removed for that set-up to be believed (preferably both). That would simply be non-negotiable.

Denny has been in search of his wrestling persona since he arrived at BGE five and a half years ago. His been the devastating tactician. He’s been the young pup needing to get schooled by a savvy veteran. But I think Denny’s potential lies in the formula of Backyard Brawls 7. He dishes out the high impact moves just as hard as he takes them. He’s inexplicably underestimated from start to finish. He may not be as “pretty” or as shredded or as big as some of the boys he faces. But every angle of his body, every lightening fast move and counter, every grunting, resentful submission and every crowing, gloating victory says that this boy not only can wrestle, he loves to wrestle. He relishes it, and the stiffer the competition, the more he enjoys the fight to outmaneuver, overpower, and humiliatingly dominate the young buck wannabes knocking at the door of BGE for a bite.