Voter Fraud

Is that a guilty grin on Z-Man’s handsome mug!?

What the hell was that?  The Reader’s Choice poll this month was an unmitigated failure, I’m afraid.  Votes were continually erased over the past two days that the poll was open.  At the end of day one of voting, it was looking like a tight race between Denny Cartier (buoyed by Aryx Quinn fans), Diego Diaz, and Jake Jenkins.  Then the next morning at least 20 votes were erased, and we started all over with a big surge in the poll for Z-Man.  Yesterday evening, at least another 20 votes disappeared, and Hooper was suddenly in the lead.  Early this morning, the poll results reported just 2 votes: a tie between Hoop and Gold Mantis.  Just 30 minutes ago, there were 3 votes recorded, adding up to a total of 150% of the vote.

Is is just me, or does Aryx look like he’s up to something?
I wish I were a tech forensics geek with the ability to definitively prove who or what was to blame for this gross miscarriage of democracy.  As with all all-electronic voting debacles, there’s no way to trace what went wrong or who was disenfranchised (though, frankly, it looks like nearly everyone was cut out of the official count).  Was it Z-Man’s minders (and I know he has quite an organization of them) scrubbing the record clean every time a competitor jumped out too far ahead of him?  Then again, I know for a fact that Aryx Quinn’s people were pushing votes for Denny based on the fact that Aryx was Denny’s tormentor in his nominated OTK.  Was it the Aryx Quinn/Tristan Baldwin machine throwing the vote when stuffing the ballot box wasn’t working?

Is Jake Jenkins as mouthwateringly innocent as he looks? 

There’s something ominous about this object lesson in relying on electronic media to approximate a democratic process.  I try not to even think about the implications of electronic voting machines in national elections for fear that I’ll never sleep restfully a whole night again in my life.  Of course the notoriously ill-supported and impersonal Google overlords that run Blogger and its in-house apps like the Blogger Poll widget are likely supremely uninvested in the outcome of the poll to determine who suffered the sexiest in an OTK backbreaker, as opposed to cronies of Presidential nominees who invest in electronic voting hardware and software, so the comparison is surely spurious.

If it was Diego Diaz, I don’t want to be the one to accuse him….

Ah, hell.  I’m not going to sleep restfully through a whole night now, at least until November 7.  The fiasco of this Reader’s Choice poll will haunt my dreams until President Obama is reelected.  I’m hoping they’re the sort of dreams where Tagg Romney gets forcibly stripped (yeah, those “undergarments,” too), surprisingly found to be packing a rock hard bod and 8-inches of pipe, and then cracked across Cage Thunder’s thigh while the masked master crushes his balls and makes him scream, “Bernie Sanders, make me your sex slave!”

Tagg Romney fantasizes about at man-on-man combat

However, I suspect my dreams will be much, much darker and more disturbing…

I offer to pay Tagg Romney $500 to let Cage Thunder do this to him….

3 thoughts on “Voter Fraud

  1. FYI: Tagg Romney earned $500 interest on his tax-free Caymen Islands trust fund in the time it took him to read your post. SAVE AMERICA FROM THE 1% — VOTE OBAMA!

  2. So you're saying you know that Tagg Romney reads neverland?! I suspected as much! And since that proves he's got a homoerotic wrestling kink, I just bet he'd totally be up for having Cage Thunder work him over.And for the record, in case there was any confusion, I'm voting for Obama and fantasizing that Tagg is much more fit and interesting than he really is.

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