Superherofan is doing an excellent job of reminding me about the gorgeous buffet of manflesh on the Starz series, Spartacus: Blood and Sand. For some reason, I need reminding, because this series (shockingly) has not become must-see television for me. The sheer quantity of high, high quality muscles on display, frequently naked, in the context of the brutality and life-and-death gladiator competition of the Roman arena seems like it would be seared into my head as a required television destination. For some reason, it has not.
To the extent that I have watched, the concept revolves around the objectification of human life, and in particular the objectification of the smokin’ hot male muscleboy. Um… yeah… why am I not watching this series slavishly?
It’s not a lack of lustfulness for the star of the show, Andy Whitfield. Sweet God, that body is like a playground jungle-gym: it must be grabbed and climbed upon, and every inch must be explored.
Astonishingly gorgeous muscle asses appear to regularly be center stage. Frequently, they’re pumping and flexing in mesmerizing rhythms of intercourse. My imaginative powers can easily photoshop the women on the bottom out of the scenes and insert my own hard pulsing body in their place. The more-than-occasional full-frontal shot also lifts Spartacus well above other skin-fest productions that I’ve been helpless to fall in obsessive lust with.
But Spartacus hasn’t yet truly captured me, enslaved me, and beaten me into submission. All the right elements haven’t yet possessed me in the manner that I expected them to. I suspect this may be a series that ensnares through the devious devices of Netflix. Sometimes I’m not just ready for a new obsession until I’m ready.
Like Michael C. Hall who recently announced his battle with cancer, Spartacus himself, Andy Whitfield is under treatment for lymphoma. The irony is, as it always is, cruel. The epitome of virility and at the peak of physical perfection, Andy is now battling with a life threatening illness. My thoughts and prayers are for his speedy recovery, his return to full health, and his gorgeous beauty once again clad only in a loin cloth… or less.
Sidelineland 