I’m Devastated… and You Should Be, Too

It’s not right. IT’S NOT RIGHT! I don’t ask so much. Some gorgeous Italian hotness with my morning cup of tea, and I can face my day. But after a couple of weeks of
vile, nasty speculation that George Stephanopoulos is replacing Diane Sawyer at Good Morning America (ahead of also-ran, my morning ray of sunshine, Chris Cuomo), now I get this devastating news: Chris is, indeed, leaving Good Morning America. Perez Hilton reports that it isn’t true, which is almost certain evidence that it is, in fact, true.

As I’ve mentioned, I don’t swear lightly. But, what the fuck. This profanity is a statement rather than a question, because I am resigned and bitter. Chris has twitted the implied confirmation that he’s leaving the show. Rumors still swirl that he may land on the anchorless ship that is 20/20 (airing at 10 pm on Fridays? seriously?). To pour salt in my wound, the corollary rumor is that JuJu Chang will take Chris’ place. I do not want to see JuJu Chang’s shirtless fishing pics.
Up is down. Good is bad. I’m adrift in the fog of confusion and disappointment that makes me question if my morning tea will ever taste as sweet. One thing is for sure: on the day that Chris is no longer playfully teasing his love-struck weatherman on my morning television, that’s the day I return to the Today Show to take solace in the furry chest of Matt Lauer. But it’s just not the same.

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