Or is that the third coming!? Whatever the fuck you want to call it, the earth just shook a little underneath my feet, because I just landed on the BG East website and saw the huge reveal celebrating BGE’s release of their 100th catalog: Brad Rochelle is back!
I’d heard told this prophecy over 2 years ago when I made my humble pilgrimage to BG East Headquarters. Kid Leopard and several of the boys assured me that Brad was returning to the homoerotic wrestling universe and that all hell was breaking loose in response. I even was granted some epic preview pics from, what turns out to be, The Contract 10: The Reckoning, that I dutifully shared with the saints and apostles of homoerotic wrestling here at neverland. And still, over the past 2 years, I’ve been questioned, interrogated even, as to the veracity of my gospel account that Brad would one day return. Doubters and nay-sayers questioned my integrity. My devout belief in the promise handed down to me at times left me a little cold and lonely, as other homoerotic wrestling fans rolled their eyes and encouraged me to abandon all hope. It’s not really going to happen. They’re just stringing us Brad-fans along. You’ve been duped.
Well, suck it you apostates! Brad Rochelle is back in Contract 10, appearing in the ring, on the mats, in the back offices, in the hallways… fuck, the guy apparently takes the action into the bathrooms of the BG East compound! First up, it appears that Brad’s trip to hell includes facing two dangerous hunks at once in the BGE ring: Attila Dynasty and Chace LaChance. This isn’t the first 2-on-1 Brad’s faced down, and he’s been precisely the hunk with the skills and strength to come out on top in the past. But does he take two of the finest young asses in the BG East stable today?
When I posted the potentially apocryphal photos I’d been handed from on high a couple of years ago, I misidentified Brad’s mat opponent as a shaggy-headed Denny Cartier. I was corrected, and Contract 10 provides abundant proof that Brad gets put through the ringer by none other than Naked Kombat alum, hunky stud Jeremy Tyler. The match description on the website makes it seem pretty clear that gorgeous Jeremy absolutely crushes Brad in his second-coming tracks, and the pics make me lose my shit all over again with what appears to be a forced-to-flex scenario with Brad’s head hanging down on hits chest in defeat, his arms outstretched like a homoerotic wrestling Jesus on the cross.
Holy shit, match 3 looks insane. Brad opponent? The Boss himself, Kid Leopard. Are you kidding me!?! The prototypical sadist heel extraordinaire and the hunky babyface who battled way, way back from jobberhood to give his turn on the heel wheel himself!? The Boss’ return to full-on ring action would be worthy of trumpet fanfare itself, but his return to take matters (i.e., Brad’s balls) into his own hands is nothing short of seismic! I can’t make heads or tails of what happens, because the website is milking the suspense with further sadistic mastery (like what Brad fan needed more coaxing to put in their order for this one!?). But what I see in the previews is intensely exciting, including Brad’s mouthwatering ass exposed, slapped, and, what’s this, kissed!?! There have not been many who managed to take Brad by his bull balls, but holy shit, it certainly looks like The Boss can add that to his trophy case, as well. Again I say, this looks like absolute insanity in worthy proportion to the epic historical moments that Contract 10 documents!
Finally, to those particular doubting Thomases who not only questioned my integrity in passing along the promise of Brad’s second-coming, but argued that Brad was probably bloated and completely out of shape at this point, again I just have to say: suck it! Fuck me, please! Brad does to me in these previews exactly what he’s done to me every moment of his career that I’ve enjoyed over and over again. He’s hot, hard, and handsome as ever, aged beautifully, and lickable from head to toe. There are lots of reasons there’s long been a feverish cadre of Brad-fanatics obsessively worshipping on their knees for every single minute of every match of his career. Just one of the reasons is that he was, and remains, a gorgeous hunk of man! Welcome back, Brad. Some of us have been faithfully waiting for you!