In the interest of public safety, I’m afraid that Gio Benitez has to re-shoot this segment for Good Morning America. I know that I’m not alone in being unconvinced by his demonstration of the dangers of rip tides. That shirt and those baggy trunks he’s wearing were clearly weighing him down as he swam in the surf, exaggerating the threat of a rip tide. If Gio had done this segment shirtless and in more modest trunks, I feel confident he’d have muscled his way right through that rip tide without breaking a sweat. I, for one, refuse to believe in the dangers of rip tides until Gio Benitez goes back to south Florida, strips down (in HD slow motion) to nothing but a tiny speedo, and does this entire demonstration all over again. If Gio truly cares about public safety, he will make this happen, and he’ll send me photos of him flexing those gargantuan biceps, bouncing those juicy pecs, and I’d pay double for an extended video of him bearhugging that hottie lifeguard who, let’s face it, despite acknowledging how much of “a grown man” Gio is, still questions Gio’s masculinity by “rescuing” him. Then, when Lara Spencer clucks, “and speaking of ripped!” about Gio’s hot body at the end of the segment, it’ll really mean something.
*Events and dialogue reported here may not exactly conform to what actually happened.