Save Me a Seat

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One of my regular rants is about how much I enjoy homoerotic wrestling in front of a live audience. From the classic public events BG East filmed many years ago, to the more recent Wrestlefest matches, recorded in front of an audience of their wrestling peers, there’s something spontaneous and extra intense about wrestlers going full throttle on each other in front of others. I had the honor of writing the match descriptions for the newly released Wrestlefest 4, because, frankly, I elbowed and shoved my way to the front of the line of writers this time to insist on getting the first glimpse of these two fabulous matches. Both matches were very satisfying, for all of the reasons that I’ve mentioned concerning the extra adrenaline rush of a live audience, but also because the wrestling is just so fucking sexy! For this post, I want to pour a little love on Jonny Firestorm and Dio Characi, and the rich cast of characters at ringside who made their match so… interactive.

It’s impossible for me to overemphasize how much I am turned on by Dio. What felt like a near miss in his debut match, is an absolute bullseye when he climbs into the ring with Jonny. Just objectively, the Brazilian bomber is just so fucking sexy! He’s the paradigmatic babyface, with an adorable face, beautiful even, stacked almost improbably on top of a fucking outrageously sexy body! BG East lists him at 6′ even, but he looks even taller, particularly as he towers over a half a foot taller than fireplug Jonny. There’s a lot to take in on Dio’s bod, from his sweet, round pecs and his hot, hot six-pack abs. But I go a little light-headed whenever I get a serious glimpse of his astonishingly sexy ass. I literally stood up and cheered when Jonny peeled the Brazilian’s trunks off, leaving an unobstructed view of those glorious glutes hugged snugly by a brave, brave little thong.

Whereas Dio brings the shiny and new to this match, Jonny brings the legitimacy of a legend. This is Jonny’s second Wrestlefest, and mind you, Wrestlefest 3 was released well over a decade ago. Jonny has been heeling, day in and day out, the whole time, and was already approaching legendary status well before Wrestlefest 2. I’m still a little astonished he and Kayden can be in the same room together, because the sense of something dangerously unsettled is palpable, as the reigning, back-to-back, multiple Top Heel awardee Kayden watches the talents and terror of a mentor who was perfecting the craft well before the first BG East year-end besties were ever handed out. Jonny’s beefy, hairy, and looking like a badass brute, which is the absolute perfect complement to cherubic playgirl bunny Dio.

The action is intense and brutal. As you might imagine, Jonny is downright diabolical, and having a couple of heel proteges at ringside certainly seems to bring out a little extra sadism and a little devilish gleam in Jonny’s eyes as he brutalizes the Brazilian babyface beauty. When he plants Dio in a tree of woe, I knew there was something magical about to happen. I had NO idea that magic would include Jonny, literally, chomping down on Dio’s huge, vulnerable bulge! Fuck, I wouldn’t brush my teeth for a week, to savor that!

While this is a babyface beatdown, this is not a squash. Dio is a fierce mother fucker, and I love him for that. He turns the tables several times on the bulldozing heel, and I buy every single one of them. A hugely muscled bearhug and a gorgeously savored OTK backbreaker demonstrate convincingly that Dio is a beast, and he came to play. But woah, the torture rack?! Parading Jonny-fucking-Firestorm around like a chump on his shoulders, wringing him out in front of the bench of babyface boosters drowning a wailing Jonny with taunts?!? Sweet!

The wrestler-audience does their job, keeping it live, fresh, and intense with the guarantee that somebody is going to get ultimately and publicly humiliated. I love the spontaneous taunts and cheers, the pleading with Dio to hold out against Jonny’s machinations, the jumping up to land a few gratuitous, completely illegal blows of their own when the opportunity “presents itself.” I’m registering exactly two complaints about the audience, though. Complaint #1: What… THE FUCK… is Freddy Campbell doing on the heel bench!? I mean, I realize that he’s Ash’s boy toy and all, but the doe-eyed pretty boy has GOT to be in line for jobber of the year at this point, and slipping him onto the heel bench, even with his badass boyfriend protecting him, just seems like a miscast. Complaint #2: Will someone PLEASE take your sock off and shove it down Forrest Taylor’s throat!?! Dude, he does not shut up, and I almost can’t quite suspend my disbelief enough to wrap my head around how Jonny didn’t drag him by his lumberjack beard into the ring and beat the living shit of him right next to Dio. Hell, I’m a little awestruck that one of the other babyfaces didn’t get fed up with Forrest’s over-exuberant work on the sidelines and pummel the pretty boy themselves. If there was ever a jobber gagging for a beatdown, it was Forrest that day on the babyface bench at Wrestlefest 4.

I loved this match, and I’m proud to have been honored with the opportunity to write the match description!

BG East Fantasies

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It may not have looked like it, but I’ve been pretty damn busy when it comes to exercising my homoerotic wrestling imagination. I’ve authored a few BG East match descriptions for their not new releases. AR and I have been exploring just how up close and personal it can get when we combine my prose and his graphic art, mixed together with a shared passion for homoerotic wrestling, and BG East, in particular (more on that later). And in that vain, I’ve been fishing more of my old archived homoerotic wrestling fiction out of the old, defunct Sidelineland Stories archives and uploading them to the Sidelineland Stories Reboot.

It’s not like BG East doesn’t produce enough blindingly hot wrestling fare to satisfy me, but knowing how out of control my imagination gets, it should come as little to surprise to anyone who reads this blog that I authored my own fan fiction to explore BG East matches that never were. The first match explores the corporate intrigue and espionage that I always imagined was going on between competing homoerotic wrestling companies. This was after Rio Garza had started wrestling with BG East, but then went to Rock Hard Wrestling, and before Z-Man had done the reverse. The tag team match featured those two babyface beauties, facing off against my personal dream team, Mitch Colby and Derek DaSilva.

I also rebooted the story of a fitness model who got in way over his head wrestling for BG East, getting schooled hard by Mitch (yeah, this was deep, deep in my infatuation with Mitch phase). I enjoyed “recruiting” someone new to the BG East universe, and played heavily off of the Contract Series that was still going hot and heavy around then.

The third match I just migrated over to the new archives was the sequel to James Dawson’s tragic contract negotiations with BG East, in which the ripped, gorgeous muscle hunk next had to square off against the bulldozer Joe Robbins.

The fourth old match you can now find in the new archives was another dream combination that, sadly, was never to be IRL. Brad Rochelle and Mitch Colby squared off in that wrestling fantasy, ticking all the boxes of babyface beauties I go weak in the knees for.

And the final match I migrated in this genre (for now) was a super clever little piece that co-author Metellus and worked on, flipping scripts and putting a literal underwear model in the BG East ring against Enforcer, and discovering that not all underwear models are “just” underwear models.

All of these BG East-inspired fantasies have been dovetailing into some really exciting works that AR and I are doing, similarly finding angles and wrestlers that would otherwise just not find their way in front of a BG East camera for real, but who, nevertheless, make for sensationally sexy homoerotic wrestling fantasies in our imaginations. More on that to come soon, I hope!

Twink Heels

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I was chatting with a friend about heels recently, and we were extolling the charms of a twink heel. Now, as soon as I broach this topic here, I brace myself for controversies over the definitions of heels (and twinks, for that matter). Just for context, let me say that I’m approaching heels in terms of wrestlers who are viciously sadistic, taking pleasure in the pain and humiliation of their opponents. A heel, to me, is a wrestler who doesn’t so much break the rules as makes his own rules that, coincidentally, typically contradict the commonly accepted standards of fair play and sportsmanship. In 2022, I feel like we’ve transcended the old characterizations of “villains,” because, let’s face it, sometimes we cheer louder for the sensational villains that the so-called heroes. The wrestlers I count as heels don’t have to always be heels. They don’t have to always win. In the transient world of homoerotic wrestling, hunks inhabit multiple characters and storylines all the time. But for at least one brief, shining moment, if they’ve been a heel, I’m counting them.

Then there’s the potential debate over what constitutes a twink. Since this is my blog, and I’m relating my conversation with my friend, let me share my take on the subject. I think of twinks as pretty, perhaps even of delicate features. They can range from downright skinny to “swimmer’s build”-fit, but aren’t heavily muscled. If a fight breaks out, you might not expect a twink to step up because they wouldn’t want to bruise their beautiful faces, and there’s probably a bigger, stronger stud nearby who’d get the job done more efficiently.

I love the idea of the combination of the two: the twink heel. Delicate, pretty, slight of build, and a viciously sadistic, fuck-the-rules, delightfully nasty son-of-a-bitch. After waxing poetic about the abstract allure of a twink heel, we were then struck with how difficult it was to come up with a robust list of them. We settled on John Wolfboy as a potential twink heel we like who’s currently wrestling. I suggested back in the day, I’d include Scott “Dark” Rogers, and even Brigham Bell (like when he fucked over Troy Baker sooooo sweetly). Who else, though? I’m sending up incense and a prayer to the homoerotic wrestling gods for some more sensational twink heels to come our way!

Have You Heard?

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I received a DM late last night asking me if knew some point of contact with the classic BG East wrestler Nick Archer. Quick answer: no, sadly. I’d love to know what Nick is up to, and if he still puts his incredible arsenal of submission holds to good use. So damn handsome. So fucking hot!

Nick Archer

It’s not uncommon that I get this type of question. I assume it’s because you all know that I’m a self-avowed low-impact stalker. I’ve spent an unreasonable amount of time in my life obsessively combing the internet for updates and clues to know more about the gorgeous hunks I lust over. I’ve also enjoyed the privilege of conducting interviews with wrestlers over the years, and it’s also true that I’ve had the amazing privilege to get to meet in-person several of the wrestling studs who step into the ring for our pleasure. I’m honored to even call a few of them friends! So, you’d be forgiven if you overestimate my behind-the-scenes, insider access to information about homoerotic wrestling stars.

Friend of the blog and the blogger, Drake Marcos

However, sometimes current and former wrestlers read these pages, and even respond in the comments or reach out to follow up by email. In case Nick Archer’s eyes ever fall on these words, I hope he knows that there’s an army of homoerotic wrestling fans who wish him well, and we’d all be delighted if he’d drop a comment to let us know he’s well.

Sal Bruno has found memories of Ken Canada!

Sal Bruno reached out to be my email a couple of weeks ago, after he recently read my interview from several years ago with Ken Canada. Sal says reading Ken’s reminisces brought back good memories for him, mostly of pounding the perkiness out of adorably sexy jobbers like Ken. I’ve lost my direct connection to Ken, but in case he’s reading this, drop me a note, buddy, and I’ll be happy to get you back in touch with Sal!

Troy Baker haunts our homoerotic wresting dreams!

There are recurring subjects of “have you heard from” messages I receive. I get hit up at least 2 or 3 times a year with questions about Troy Baker. Trust me, I get it! Troy’s monster quads show up often in my fondest wrestling fantasies. The only intel I have on Troy came from the Boss, who once told me that Troy left the world of homoerotic wrestling on good terms, but an old hockey injury knocked him out of competition. In case Troy ever reads these words, I’d like to suggest that he consider sending up a flag to a whole lot of us fierce fans, and I’d bet he’d rake in some cash with a OF glimpse of himself!

Text Me, Sexy Alexi!

Some other common questions I field focus on babyface heroes like Brad Rochelle, Alexi Adamov, Chris Bruce, Mr. Joshua Goodman… I don’t have any lines of communications with those guys, either, but just listing their names here leaves me with all sorts of feels. I will always, ALWAYS be thrilled to hear from any of them, and pass along the passionate appreciation their fans have for them still!

Need a kidney?

Of course, I have my own personal wish list of wrestlers I’d love to have a direct line to. Kid Vicious has teased me cruelly over the years (because… he’s Kid Vicious!) about the possibility of an actual sit-down, full-on interview. Sadly, that’s never happened, and he hasn’t even teased me with the possibility of it in a couple of years. I’ve heard various rumors that he’s retired from active wrestling, or not… that he now lives full-time in the UK, or not… that he actively trains new BG East recruits, or not…. He’s been edging me ruthlessly for years, so I can only imagine how hard I’d pop if I ever actually landed that interview. I’ve got SO many questions. And I’d donate a kidney to get to see one of those training sessions!

Feel free to send me your “where are they now” questions, though I don’t promise to have the answers. But I’ll be happy to put out the call to the ether, and hope that our favorite homoerotic wrestling hunks might just read, and respond, to the passionate appreciation of their fans!

Thongs for the Win

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BG East has a sale running on their membership site, Arena. It appears that someone has lovingly curated all of the Video On Demand matches that feature wrestlers in thongs. Fuck me, where did I go so miserably wrong, that I did not end up with the job of combing through the BGE catalog looking for thongs?! I feel like my entire educational career is suddenly a tragic farce, now that I know what job I should have been padding my resume for all these years. And those “career aptitude” inventories I filled out for my guidance counselor were clearly a load of bull shit, because if I was hardwired for any particular career, it’s OBVIOUSLY to be the lucky son of a bitch tasked with categorizing BG East products by themes for sales promotions. Fuck you, Mrs. Rogers, my high school guidance counselor, who said I ought to pursue a career in human services or educational settings.

In a cheap imitation of the professional I wish I was, I’ve now been spending some time looking through the sale catalog at matches with thongs. Woozy, what an erotic trip down memory lane! Like, Reese Wells getting his balls bashed until his cock was so hard that it, nor his balls, could fit inside his bullseye thong’s pouch any longer. Sweet fucking homoerotic wrestling gods. Legendary.

Mike Columbo’s thonged dismantling of Jay Stevens from Fantasymen 18 gets a discount in this sale. Let me repeat, Mike Columbo’s ass in a thong…. Good fucking gods, are you kidding me? Talk about legendary, and this match is from the first DVD I ever bought, in no small part because of the irresistible allure of Mike’s bare ass cheeks. He is a TERROR in the match, and I personally never loved him as much as when Mike was brutalizing a lucky fucker like Jay, wringing him out to two dimensions in epic, epic muscleboy body scissors.

The Gear Wars: UK Kink match between Ashley and Rob has recently been on my mind for some reason. And by “some reason,” I mean Rob’s stunningly gorgeous cock, and the ridiculously weird sock-fetish theme of the match. Honestly, I came for Ashley’s prettiness, but I go back again, and again, (and again) for Rob’s insanely gorgeous muscles, stunningly hot cock (I know, I already said that, but it bears repeating), and his sensational intensity that totally rubs out any campiness from the sock fetish antics.

And finally, Thrash thrashing El Favorito, who I’m convinced was named in honor of me! Sweet fucking gods, El Favorito’s ass NEVER looked better, and I’m in more of a position than most fans to back that claim up. And I maintain a long, long, LOOONG simmering crush on Thrash, and, in particular, his circus strongman, insanely sexy quads.

More thongs need to show up, and then get ripped off, in homoerotic wrestling, as far as I’m concerned. But who am I? Clearly not an insider living my best self with the job I was born for.

Fine Art

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Fuck. Me. I just posted a new post here, and somewhere after I pressed publish, everything that I’d written disappeared. What. the. fuck. Now, I’m sort of pissed that I need to compose this entire post. Let’s see. What was I saying? I’m sure that I said that I’m deeply grateful to AR for inspiring me get back to composing words about homoerotic wrestling, both in terms of this blog, and in writing new homoerotic wrestling fiction.

I’m pretty positive I suggested that you should check out the newest addition to the Producer’s Ring, which is a sequel to the illustrated match AR and I posted a couple of weeks ago, when Ryan Gosling faced off against Timothée Chalamet. I’m sure I was more eloquent the first time, before I started having to shove down my irritation at technology and the vicissitudes of WordPress, but the new match, in which Baby Goose shows back up to square off against Jake Gyllenhaal this time, is even more brutal than the last match.

I’m certain I waxed existential about the alchemy I’m enjoying in co-creating this text/graphic art combination. Knowing me, I’m sure I also mentioned that AR’s images of Baby Goose’s ass-in-jeopardy keeps turning me on like a light switch.

I probably mused about the way the total of our words and AR’s graphics make the final product so much more than the sum of its parts. But the real take home message is that you should jump over to the Producer’s Ring, settle in for some extended time in the Focus Group, and bring a towel to wipe off with as you read the illustrated homoerotic wrestling fiction in this newest addition to the archives. Oh, yeah, and I mentioned that I don’t have a way for you to comment on the stories directly, there in the archives, so you should let us know what you think in the comments here and/or on Twitter.

And finally, in conclusion, fuck technology.

Mio Dio!

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I’d like to extend my personal welcome and heartfelt gratitude to Dio Characi, as he debuts with BG East! I’ve been swooning over Dio on social media for several months now, and it was like manna from heaven when he strolled into frame as part of Hunkbash 27, in the latest catalog release just a couple of days ago.

I was already a little big familiar with Dio from the teaser clips he posts on Twitter, featuring some of him wrestling, but even more of him brutally dominating and humiliating extremely eager worshipers. The Brazilian hunk is such a perfectly sexy example of a cherubic, ridiculously adorable baby face, attached to an insanely sexy, dripping with sensuality, centerfold-ready body. I was already in awe of him, but the cottage-industry format of his self-produced work hasn’t let me really study this stunning stud from the angles, and with the quality of video, that I’ve really, really wanted. I have literally said, out loud, “Fuck, someone buy this muscle hunk a plane ticket and get him into a BG East ring!” So, in further proof that the wrestling gods answer the prayers of the truly devout, Dio showed up to face Ace Aarons.

This is not a unqualified hit for me, I feel the need to put out there right away. I feel like Ace and Dio aren’t quite on the same page, in a way that keeps interrupting the seductively sexy flow of the story that they’re telling. The story is sensational, mind you. Ace is the pro wrestling hunk with a thousand ways to wring a submission out of an opponent, and the scorching hot bod to look so, so good doing it. Dio is openly in awe of Ace. Like, he can’t restrain himself from almost instantly touching him, almost reverently. There’s this strong, not quite spoken out loud element of the story that says that Dio would just as soon get straight to fucking this hot, hard, pro wrestler. But then there’s this added twist, that’s delightfully twisted, that Dio is getting OFF the more Ace manhandles him.

Okay, so far, we’re golden, as far as I’m concerned. I’m also thrilled with the plot point that Ace, despite his aggressive, best intentions, keeps getting almost hypnotically distracted from schooling the newbie, because of Dio’s insane prettiness and smoking hot bod. Again, absolutely everything makes perfect sense to me about this story. If I was hell-bent on beating the shit out of my next opponent, and in walks Dio… yeah, I’d have a hard time remembering mission #1.

There are misfires in the chemistry, though. Like, Dio is seemingly getting stoked hard by getting manhandled, but then again, he takes the opportunity to turn the tables whenever Ace gets distracted by the Brazilian’s sexy (SEXY!!!) lips. He literally defies Ace’s claim that the pro wrestler has “punished” him by shoving Dio’s face in his crotch, instead making it clear that Dio is downright ecstatic to have his face shoved in Ace’s crotch. “So, you push my head in our crotch, and you think I am the loser?” Dio is incredulous, like he’d rather be nowhere else in the world. But then, why is he fighting so hard to punish Ace?

There’s also this moment that feels like actual heat, when Ace calls Dio his bitch. You can almost see Dio’s spine stiffen, as he rejects the claim. “I will NEVER be your bitch!” And, for a moment, I’m thinking that’s exactly what Dio has been sort of angling for from the very start of this match, to get severely punished in just that right way that gets Dio off, to be manhandled and dominated, not despite Dio’s intentions, but because he wants it bad. Maybe it’s a moment that got lost in translation. But I’m sort of confused about exactly what Dio wants. And the harder Ace shakes himself out of the hypnotic reverie of lusting over the new kid, I’m not exactly sure what’s motivating Ace, anymore, either.

I’m having a hard time explaining what I thought was a misfire, and I’m in danger of making much more out of it than I really intend. So let me just point out what is working really, really, REALLY well for me in this match. Dio Characi is fucking GORGEOUS in high definition, and in extremely brief white trunks. His thick, hairy thighs, and that beautiful, round ass, are 110% worth the price of his plane ticket from Brazil. His smart ass banter and that knee-bucklingly sexy accent make watching him in a full match for the first time intensely rewarding for me, personally.

Ace is punishing and relentless, and watching him play the part of the beast, seduced by beauty, is both hilarious and provocative. Maybe, I’m just resenting Ace for successfully shoving down his lust and tearing his lips away from Dio’s, because that requires a suspension of disbelief that even my legendarily outrageous imagination struggles to achieve.

Please, please, homoerotic wrestling gods, grace us with more Dio matches. And I beg you, in the name of all that is good and right in this world, pit the Brazilian heartthrob against a mere mortal, more like me, someone who, when faced with Dio’s erotic offense, will see that story through to the only conclusion that could possibly make sense.

Producer’s Ring

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My work life kicks into high gear in a few days, so I’m trying to take advantage of the fleeting moments of summer to transfer some more matches from the old Producer’s Ring archives to their new location.

I continue to half-anticipate something more cringey about re-reading my old homoerotic wrestling fiction, but I keep surprising myself. I mean, it’s seriously dated. The first matches I wrote are about 12 years old now, so, it’s evident to see the march of time putting the Hollywood hunks I was obsessing over into context. Like, I was such a HUGE Heroes fan. HUGE. I still have a fast-twitch instant erection at Adrian Pasdar’s name, and that’s even after listening to The Chicks Gaslighter album a couple of hundred times in the past year and a half, where Adrian’s cheating ways get aired out with such excellent musical accompaniment. So, little wonder that I was so into picturing who would win a no-holds-barred homoerotic wrestling competition between Milo Ventimiglia and Sendhil Ramamurthy, also Heroes stars. The world has moved on, but it’s fascinating to get transported back to that moment when Milo and Sendhil seemed like the perfectly sexy, obvious pairing. And I did not remember what a seriously brutal match that was! Despite the way their careers took shape in the intervening decade, I still stand by my picture of who would obliterate whose ass.

It took me half a beat to even remember who the fuck Hunter Parrish was when I was transcribing a couple of his stores. Oh, right, I was up to my armpits in Weeds at the time, and feeling way, way frustrated at the cocktease that Hunter Parrish was, playing an emerging adult with mommy issues. However, I had no problem at all placing his opponent, Teddy Sears, who continues to strike a chord in my crotch every time I get a glimpse of him, almost always in some supporting role, looking so fucking fine! I don’t know if I even know any friends IRL who would even recognize the name Teddy Sears, and here I am, self-appointed president of his homoerotic wrestling fan club, instantly hard when I see him in a new role, preferably playing a gay character or someone in a throuple. The match between Hunter and Teddy was always going exactly one direction, and STILL, I was delightfully surprised and aroused re-reading where my mind was those years ago.

And then, it’s no wonder at all that I had to toss Hunter back into some action, because, let me explain again, he was such an epic, major league cocktease! I was seriously working some shit out in Hunter’s second match, facing off against Ben Godfre in the first Secretarial Pool match, which, now that I think about it, later evolved into an elimination tournament to select the newest member of Eli Brody’s elite executive team, with blog readers weighing in. Fuck, what a stroll down memory lane. Fuck, I loved those hunky executive assistants hard! Fuck… Ben Godfre! This, all before Ben hoisted his spectacular full monty freak flag for the average joe, like me, to see that he’s even kinkier and sexier than even my overactive imagination was picturing!

And finally, for this update, the first Major Domo match. As I remember it, the Major Domo stories emerged from my serious, certainly obvious crush I have ALWAYS had on the main character in the Producer’s Ring universe, West Coast Titan Eli Brody. Eli is in almost every story, but he’s pulling strings and typically fully clothed in business suits. Writing him so much, I quickly developed a crush, and I ached to see Eli do more than just sit back and watch, though, honestly, there’s something super sexy about a knock-dead gorgeous beefcake in a suit sitting back and watching two nearly naked/naked hunks ripping into each other. But I digress. The Major Domos took the action to Eli’s living room, and were built on the premise that, on rare occasions, Eli involves himself personally in providing… let’s say, “career advice,” to struggling hunks.

I hope that pulling these stories from the homoerotic wrestling fiction archives tickle at least some of you just right.

And just because I feel compelled to say “I told you so,” I just wanted to point out that low-key genius artist AR immediately sent me a humble disclaimer of all of the praise I heaped on him in my last pose. Seriously, that guy is freaking brilliant, and ridiculously humble. Send him some love at his DeviantArt profile, and tell him that I sent you. It’ll drive him nuts.

Will Breaker

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AR is genuinely low-key genius when it comes to his eye for homoerotic wrestling. One of the unexpectedly fun aspects of my recent collaboration with him, co-creating with me my first illustrated homoerotic wrestling fiction, was the particular give and take of the creative process. At times, I’d take the lead with some text, describing the scene, detailing a hold, scripting the dialogue. Then, like half a day later, AR would have created a 3D image in astonishing detail of that moment that had, just hours earlier, only existed in my mind’s eye. At other times, he would craft an image of a hold or a plot point, and then I’d write the text through the middle of the lane markers that he so skillfully generated for the story. It was a very cool creative process that we’re already investing in replicating.

One of the coolest moments in the creative process of putting together the Focus Group homoerotic wrestling match, featuring Ryan Gosling and Timothée Chalamet, was near the end of our work, when AR asked if we were missing a beat in the narrative. We built this moment in the plot when one hot, hard hunk is at the brink of despair, and AR asked the perfect question, of whether the action we’d constructed sufficiently and convincingly shoved the poor, gorgeous fucker over that edge. It was AR’s idea to add one more hold to fully justify the way the story unfolds, and he was the one who suggested that we use the Will Breaker.

Charlie Evans in the Will Breaker in Ring Rookies 5

I know this hold from Charming Chase Addams’ matches, and from having enjoyed the opportunity in the past to hear Chase talk about the development of the hold, and his creative process in coming up with the name for it. Chase is an innovator, and a passionately devoted student of the science and art of pro wrestling. The range of holds in his arsenal is pretty fucking incredible, particularly when I think about how ridiculously young and pretty he is. (Not that being pretty has anything to do with it. I just wanted to mention how pretty Chase is.)

Kirk Donahue in the Will Breaker in Florida Fights 7, winner of 2018 Best Submission!

I don’t think I really fully appreciated the complexity and beauty of the Will Breaker until it came time for me to try to describe, in words, one homoerotic wrestler applying the hold to another. Like, fuck, the words fail me! I watch him do it, mind you. It’s not like some mystery that happens behind a curtain somewhere. The spotlight over the ring allows no slight of hand or smoke and mirrors. I watch him do it, and even still, it’s fucking complex and nuanced and mysterious!

Tiko meets the Will Breaker in Chase’s Wrestler Spotlight Collection.

AR suggested something similar in his creative process of constructing a 3D render of the hold. He mentioned needing to painstakingly place each limb and joint, because there are no software shortcuts to create something like that. It’s not a position the human body was meant to easily slip into, or to endure for very long, so shaping a 3D rendering was, as I understand it, a significant challenge. And, thus, I repeat myself when I say that AR is a low-key genius. As soon as I publish this post, I’m going to get an email from him, humbly insisting on a disclaimer from my praise, but don’t believe him. He’s fucking brilliant.

Chase is, obviously, brilliant at what he does, as well. He’s not low-key about it, though. Chase knows his own genius, and he strips down to nearly nothing, climbs into a wrestling ring in front of a room full of cameras and microphones, and does magic like this that makes me gasp.

Christian Taylor gets the Will Breaker in Chase’s debut, in Tag Team Torture 19, Best Ring Match and Best Overall Match of 2016!

Anyway, I’m appreciating today these two young geniuses with such a passion for the science and art of homoerotic wrestling, of one fierce hunk taking possession of another, crushing one man’s hopes and dignity, and handing his body entirely over to his opponent. In their own ways, AR and Chase both get it, so deeply and fully!

Richie Douglas reaches Will Breaker perfection in Ring Wars 32, Best Ring Match and Best Submission of 2019 (see a pattern!?)

Producer’s Ring

wrestlebard4 Comments

I’m sitting on several exciting projects that should ripen nicely within the coming days and weeks. I’m working on my next homoerotic wrestling comic, and I’m really, really enjoying how it’s turning out, so far. Here are a couple of preview images for you, available only here on the blog, in various states of being incomplete. They’ll look different in their final drafts, but I know some of you will get a kick out of the works-in-progress versions. The final drafts, in full comic layout, will appear at part of Sidelineland Stories.

Astonishingly, I’m even more stoked for the impending publication of a new Focus Group match in the Producer’s Ring. I alluded to this last week, but this will be the combustible compound that results from mixing my prose with ARs astonishingly sexy 3D artwork. We’ll be publishing this new match, the first, ever, illustrated Producer’s Ring match, very soon, at the resurrected Producer’s Ring archives. Here are some teasers to give you a sneak peak of what’s to come.

And finally, I wish I had an intern for the tedious grunt work of translating the old archives over to their new homes. But, alas, without an intern, it’s just me doing the tedium. Most recently, I’ve uploaded to the Producer’s Ring a couple more Focus Group matches, along with the first TV League match I ever wrote. To be pedantic, this version of the TV League match pitting Jamie Bamber against Tahmoh Penikett is the “director’s cut” version that I re-wrote and published on the pages of this blog about a year and a half ago. It’s just written soooo much better, and the plot and details are just way, way more interesting than the original. If some diehard really wants a copy of the original version, like, if you’re doing a dissertation on the rhetorical development of my homoerotic wrestling celebrity fan fiction, and you simply have to have the untouched earliest historical document, let me know. Short of that, I’m just sticking with publishing this newer version, because it’s fucking sexier!

I don’t know how long this burst of creativity will keep going, but I’m riding the wave as far as it will take me. I hope you enjoy some of it!