My Netflix account is only about 4 months old, but it’s earned the subscription fee back several times over. For example, I’ve been binge watching Chuck, which I sort of lost track of when it was originally airing around the middle of season 2. The casting director needs an honorary homoerotic wrestling award for packing so much wrestling fantasy meat into one production. In a lottery-style homoerotic wrestling tournament, in which competitors draw names for their opponents in an elimination competition, who would end up in the final round, what genre of homoerotic wrestling, and who would be the Chuck Champ? I know how this celebrity homoerotic wrestling fantasy plays out in my mind. What about you? Comment with your take…
Nerds frequently do it for me. Not all nerds, not all the time. But frequently. Squarehippies has a nice running feature on dorks, as in “Adorkable,” but I’m drawing a fine distinction here in saying 1) not all nerds are dorks, and 2) Squarehippies’ inclusion of Ryan Reynolds as a dork tells me that we must be talking about very, very different things.
I recently threw Christopher Gorham into a wrestling ring in my gay wrestling fiction. He’s a fantastically hot nerd who brought some surprisingly hot moves and attitude into his battle with Jerry O’Connell. The skinny nerd with glasses who can rip open his shirt and reveal an entirely lickable chest is guaranteed a recurring role in my imagination.
While I haven’t written this match up yet, I’m entranced by the tasty, nerdy combination of Elijah Wood and Daniel Radcliffe. Now that Daniel is 20 years old, my socially appropriate restraint in identifying him as an object of lust is officially unrestrained. Together with Elijah, they’re both gorgeously short, skinny, self-conscious nerds (have you seen either of them in an interview!?) who I’d like to see in a sincere throw down turned body worship.
Zachary Levi is borderline nerd, but worth the mention. He plays nerd nicely, but I suspect if you scratch the surface, you’d find a cocky face with more than a healthy self-esteem. I think that writing him into a wrestling match would offer an opportunity to see Zach’s true nature come out, and between you and me, I strongly suspect that nature could include some over confidence in need of a healthy dose of suffering.
Kal Penn is nearly too hip to be a nerd, but I include him anyway. He’s too busy helping the Obama administration undo a little of the damage done to the world from the previous administration, so I’m not expecting him to show up in a wrestling match anytime soon. But he’s clearly smart and sexy, and that’ll get you at least halfway to full on certification as a nerd with the key to my heart (and crotch).
Finally, this shot of Nicholas Lemons makes me just a little dizzy (in a good way). The nerd glasses on the hardbody with ink is so completely hot. Nicholas hardly qualifies as a nerd, but this particular look makes me feel just a little faint. It could be the cold I’m still recovering from, but I think it’s the hotness of Nicholas channeling his (very) inner nerd that’s rearranging my blood flow.