We’re barely a week into the new year and I can already predict, with absolute certainty, what one of my top 5 favorite moments of 2011 will be. In fact, I may need to start a favorite moment of the decade category for this. One of my favorite moments of the year is going to be, without a doubt, being contacted by Lon Dumont, my current #1 contender for the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division (and inaugural championship title holder).
Lon dropped me a note last week, letting me know that he’d run across this blog and had appreciated my kind words about him and his outstanding wrestling with BG East. He also offered me the tantalizing tease that he’s expecting to wrestle some more with BGE this year. The promise of seeing more of giant-killer Lon climbing into the ring and squeezing agonizingly long, gasping submissions out of his shocked opponents is already making me a little breathless!
It’s hardly surprising to learn that Lon is a competition bodybuilder. A friend recently sent me some pics of Lon on stage, displaying his award winning physique. The sight of his bronzed, oiled, shredded, vascular marvel of a body makes my eyes hurt, probably because I’m just not blinking as I stare in wondering adoration. Totally worth it.
While Lon’s physique in still-frame is simply, undeniably, a work of art, I continue to maintain that his ring persona is what makes him a standout object of homoerotic wrestling kink gold. At 5’7″ tall and 150 pounds, Lon might seem to be at a disadvantage when he climbs into the ring with likes of 6’1″, 210 pound Eddie Rey or even 5’10”, 185 pound rookie, Terry O’Daly. But as his undefeated record in 1-on-1 competition attests, he’s got precisely what it takes to bring the big boys to their knees. You could tell from the moment that Eddie Rey climbed into the ring with Lon in Lon’s debut BGE match, when Lon challenged the muscle hunk to forced-to-flex stakes and called towering Eddie “Sprout,” that Lon had the cold confidence and the ring savvy to zero out whatever size advantage his opponent might enjoy. Frankly, I almost feel a little sorry for Eddie and Terry by the end of their encounters with Lon. With all of their illusions of crushing a “little guy” shattered, and with Lon flexing his competition-quality muscles in their faces humiliatingly, I catch myself almost feeling a pang of pity for them. Happily, Lon is as pitiless as he is devastating, and I’m left with nothing but lustful awe for the big, big man packed into a tightly shredded, striated, gorgeously muscled, compact body.
Lon’s only blemish on his BGE record thus far is his tag team loss wrestling alongside of rookie Chace LaChance, falling to the dirty tricks of big bruiser Donnie Drake and his rookie sidekick, Doug Rand. Now, this is just my opinion, but I think go-go boy Chace deserves some harsh retribution for his part in earning the giant killer a tick in the loss column. Lon hasn’t mentioned anything to me about it, but it just seems to me that if anyone has earned some harsh feelings from Lon, it’s that far-too-prettyboy poser.
Of course, Chace only has a 2 inch height advantage and about a 5 pound weight advantage over Lon, which seems like a complete joke when you take a look at Lon’s absolutely masterful dismantling of muscle stud bigboy, Eddie Rey. So, true, perhaps a grudge match with Chace might not be as competitive as a typical Lon Dumont wrestling clinic, but I’d put money on the odds that an obliterating go-go boy beatdown would be every bit as entertaining. Seriously, I’d put money on that!
Taking a page from the trailblazer, Joe at Ringside at Skull Island, I’ve approached Lon about the possibility of an interview to post here. He seems as generous outside the ring as he is relentlessly dominating inside the ring, so we’ll be scheduling that soon. I suppose I should make it clear that personal communication from a top-tier wrestler-obsession of mine shouldn’t tip the scales at all in his direction as I dispassionately weigh the current rankings of my favorites. By no means should Lon get any favoritism from me. That said, if I were Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), I’d stop staring at my massive balls and look over my shoulder, because there’s a 5’7″ bodybuilder with a vicious streak coming up fast from behind! Watch for more from me here, and watch for more from Lon at BGE this year. In the mean time, I’m going to go buy some Visine, because I still can’t take my eyes away from those stone-carved abs!