I had a birthday a couple of days ago. One more year older, one more year closer to perfection. Someone who knows of my infatuation with BG East classics and glimpses behind the scenes gifted me with a few pics I’ve never seen before featuring homoerotic wrestling hunks who have populated my erotic fantasies for nearly 2 decades. Now that’s a birthday present! Knowing the perfect surprise gift to give is surely the sign of a true friend. So climb into your way-back machine and vicariously enjoy my thrill when I received these hot, mostly candid pics of sizzlingly sexy wrestling titans of yesterday (and a couple, still of today!).
This shot of Ian, Sean, KV and KL sunning in the sand is instantly one of my most treasured possessions. Each of these hunks surely owns his own corner in the homoerotic wrestling hall of fame. I’m still torn as to whether Sean “the Kisser” Patrick or Christian Taylor deserves the lifetime achievement award for sexiest liplock. And gorgeous heel master Kid Vicious can pull my trigger absolutely any time. What’s with the Boss being the only one fully clothed here?
I need help identifying the bright-eyed babyface flexing his bicep under Brian Baxter’s chin. Seeing these classic hunks so obviously having fun together is so awesome. Brian Baxter’s marathon ring match with Kid Leopard, with fellow wrestlers off camera flinging taunts and catcalls, is one of the rawest, sexiest, personality-forward homoerotic wrestling matches ever.
Holy crap look at this reunion of pioneers of homoerotic wrestling hotness! The two silver foxes on the left in the back defy me, though I feel like I ought to be able to identify them. Shane McCall and an unmasked Cage Thunder are both classics and ongoing forces to be wrestled with in BG East new releases. Tommy Lopez! Tommy Lopez!!! Just a few months ago I was waxing nostalgic about this babyface wrestling rock star. And if you want to be brought to your knees hard, check out Tommy and Sailor Rob’s photo collection from their full frontal, pedal to the metal homoerotic wrestling match in BGE’s Arena Vintage section. And it’s great to see KL and Sailor Rob are still close after their cut throat, brutally humiliating title match documented in the Arena’s Vintage Photo Story.
Humungous, hot, hard as granite rookie Biff Farrell.
Imagine my surprise to discover that the magnificent blond muscle boy debuting in Lon Dumont’s new release Wrestler Spotlight compilation is, in fact, named Biff. I thought he looked like a Biff. I even announced here that I’d think of him as “Biff” until I learned otherwise. I also mentioned how I’d enthusiastically nurse a fantasy of seeing him kick sand in some twink’s face.
BG East offers up the stats that Biff is 5’7″ and 190 pounds. Damn, I want more numbers!
Fuck, I like the look of Biff. From every angle. I’m crazy for those baby blue eyes and beautiful boyband face. His shoulders are insanely huge. That ass is a work of art. But fuck it all, those lightly hairy, gargantuan legs simply blow my mind.
Hello, Legs!!!
It should come as no surprise to anyone that I was first in line to get my hands all over Lon Dumont’s first Wrestler Spotlight release. As the president of the Lon Dumont fan club, I officially cannot ever get enough of watching BG East’s resident pro wrestler turned competitive bodybuilder turned pro wrestling bodybuilder. His Wrestler Spotlight 3-some is piled high with everything that makes me so obsessed with Lon. His body. His attitude. His body. His brutality. His body. His humor. His body. But even I have to admit that my blood was rushing even harder to see what Lon would do with a bombshell beefcake newbie like big, beautiful Biff.
Lon mounts the “spine-tingling” rookie from behind. Understandably.
Lon sees it too, mind you. Lon is absolutely taken with the mass of gorgeous muscles flexing back at him when he first arrives ringside. He literally pulls up a stool to just sit and watch this phenomenal specimen pump out some of the most impressive, titillating first look flexing you’ve ever seen on a newbie. Words are exchanged. An arm wrestling challenge does not go Lon’s way. And with his delicate ego bruised, Lon is all over every succulent inch of big Biff. He announces, ominously, thrillingly, that this is going to be a forced-to-flex match. Lon’s debut with BG East just a few years ago demonstrated how devastating he can be when submissions don’t count without being forced to flex. All that muscle on Biff. Lon chomping at the bit to make him flex. Holy shit, this is pure gold!
Holy hell, Biff knows what to do with ring ropes!
Here’s the thing, though. If you’re like me, you expect big, brawny, babyface beefcake Biff to absolutely dominate in pure, stunning, overpowering strength. But if you’re like me, you also expect Lon’s years of indy pro wrestling experience, battle worn into one of the most devastating, vicious wrestling heels currently in the ring, to out hustle and outmaneuver the green rookie. So if you’re like me, you’ll be profoundly delighted to watch this untried, unknown mountain of muscle seriously wrestle! He repeatedly knocks Lon on his rock hard glutes, and then follows up with astonishingly confident and devastating pro wrestling moves. Lon is in serious jeopardy through most of this match, which is a place I never expected to see him in, at least not against a doe-eyed rook.
Flex for me, Biff!
Lon is a tenacious fucker, though, and although it takes him quite a bit more time and effort than he’d planned, eventually he maneuvers bulging Biff nice an snug between a rock and Lon’s hard spot. The muscled rook is no dummy. When he’s stuck but good, he obediently pumps out precisely the poses that his bodybuilder tormentor demands. Lon is a maestro, playing this remarkable rookie for everything he’s worth. The juxtaposition of devastatingly hot, powerful muscles and the humiliation of submissively flexing at his opponent’s command is what makes me such a total sucker for precisely this type of match.
Let’s see that most muscular, rookie!
Lon gives us a guided tour of Biff’s magnificent muscles, dragging him to the edge of unconsciousness over and over, driving him to the brink of panic and relenting only when we get to see another display of Biff’s physique. This is total ownership. The rook is Lon’s plaything. And I am once again in awe of how completely Lon turns me on. That, I knew to expect. What I didn’t expect was how instantly big Biff Farrell has captured my imagination, set up shop in my wrestling fantasies, and left me breathlessly waiting to see what those skills, that physique, and all of that potential will do next!
Luscious, massive, sweat-soaked, muscles look so sexy conquered and defenseless!
Welcome to the family, Biff. Can’t wait to see much, much more of you!
I have no way of predicting when I’m going to receive the proverbial brown paper package, sans return address, with a new batch of smuggled pics of the inner sanctum of BG East from the anonymous benefactor I’ve dubbed, simply, Our Man Inside (OMI). This latest batch was actually signed “OMI,” which makes me chuckle… and worry a bit that the fans’ spy may be getting cocky. Speaking of dangerously cocky, did I mention how fervently Drake Marcos denied being OMI when I visited him at BG East’s South Campus last fall? Regular readers may remember that Drake was one of the first to smuggle pics to me from behind the scenes at a BG East taping. However, he also got caught, and rumor is, got his ass handed to him long and hard for dabbling in corporate espionage. So Drake brought up the topic all on his own last fall, pointedly clarifying that he isn’t the one who has continued to sneak peeks to me from behind the curtain at BG East. There was a slight tone of desperateness about his unsolicited denials that makes me think whoever OMI is (and I’m not saying that it definitely ISN’T the Cheshire Cat), I hope he continues to fly under the radar, because it sure seemed to me like hottie Drake was reliving some personal terror as he adamantly denied continuing his smuggling operation.
Whoever OMI is, I’d make him my honorary favorite homoerotic wrestler insider, if I could post of picture of him and give credit where it’s due. Of course, that would defeat the purpose. And I don’t want that purpose defeated, or OMI found out, because once again he slipped out what appear to be some cutting room floor shots from behind the scenes of BG East homoerotic wrestling tapings. There’s a brand new mountain of blond muscle who looks like he belongs in some Beach Blanket Beefcake flick from the the 60’s. Most of these appear to be from recent releases, so hopefully we’ll see Blond Bombshell Biff in action soon. And thank heavens for more candid, between takes reveals of fantasy studs like Lon Dumont, Jake Jenkins, Kayden Keller, and Jonny Firestorm. Seeing these gorgeous wrestlers without their game faces on makes me that much more infatuated with watching them suit up, slip into the ring, and go to town.
Hello, Rookie! I’m breathless with the anticipation of being formally introduced to this new mountain of beautiful muscle. In the mean time, I’m calling him “Biff” and fantasizing about seeing him kick sand in some lucky twink’s face.This looks like a way back shot of perpetual infatuation of mine, Lon Dumont, and his first BG East tag team partner, Chace LaChance from several years ago. Lon has put on more muscle and grown a lot more hair since then, and Chace has bulked up about twice this size!Speaking of size, incredibly hot beefcake rookie Sam Sellers caught a lot of fans’ attention, including mine, in his recent debut in Mat Scraps 3. Seeing him with specs (and very little else) makes this muscleman about 20 times sexier than he already was, as far as I’m concerned.I love this shot of Sam and Ben Monaco with the video cameras off. Ben looks like it’s just occurred to him that he may have bitten off more than he can chew. Sam’s wide, open smile is so fucking handsome!So perhaps OMI is a little infatuated with rookie beefcake Sam as well. Not hard to miss why!Jake Jenkins peels his hot, athletic body off the floor in what looks like a takeout from his recent Barefoot Babyfaces ring match. I never, ever get tired of seeing this Von Erich-esque stud!By all accounts, Jonny Firestorm is the prankster of the BG East boys. This appears to be the aftermath of a dozing jobber Skip Vance being on the receiving end of Jonny’s humiliating humor.Kayden Kellar has come on like a house on fire in the past 16 months dialing up the dastardly and roaringly erotic dial as a rising heel. All of that squeezed into a windsor knot, and you might never guess what a vicious sexual sadist he is!This appears to be a shot of The Boss himself getting an up close and personal view of Jake Ryder and Z-Man’s sizzling hot bodies working each other over hard in Mat Scraps 3. What a fucking dream job!
Cameron Matthews invites you, the consumer, to explain why incredibly hot pro Maverick and rising rookie Zach Reno are going at it in their new release match, Pro Wrestlers: Up Close. It implies an interesting confessional: this is a match in need of a narrative. The pace and intensity of both bearded beauties is fantastic. Zach is clearly in way, way over his head, but pro Maverick sells a solid plot, letting the hirsute rookie hang with the back and forth battle of punishing holds until Mav snarls, “I’ve had enough of this,” and opens up an industrial size can of whoop ass. He fucks Zach up relentlessly in the corner. He wraps his fingers up viciously in that manic tangle of long locks and drags the slack-jawed rookie all over the mat by his hair. Whatever Maverick’s motivation at the start of this match, he soon demonstrates dastardly delight in driving his drowning opponent to the brink of terror, threatening to break his back, snap him in half, drag out the torture a good 15 minutes past the point that the consummate pro could count the burned rookie out. I’m gasping at Maverick’s bounce off the rope moonsault, after which he crows about how brutal it must be for Zach to feel the pro’s steel clad six pack abs pounding down on him. By far the highlight for me is a flat-footed standing dropkick in which all of those bulging muscles on Maverick leap ridiculously high into the air, coil like a spring, and then explode, driving his boot heels squarely into Zach’s chin. Takes me back to being driven crazy watching Kevin von Erich defy gravity with that sort of grace and power.
It’s the trunks.
So I guess I do have my theory about why it is these two stunning fantasy men are “going at it” from the start. I think impeccably groomed and perfectly appointed Maverick is seriously pissed to share the ring with Zach Reno’s trunks. The rookie’s washed out lavender pro style trunks completely distract me, so I’m going to project (a lot) here and say they drive Maverick past the breaking point.
Maverick hangs Zach, and his trunks, from the turnbuckle like dirty laundry.
Since Zach’s appearance in BG East’s Gazebo Grappler’s 17, we’ve seen him with an increasingly unkempt mass of panhandler rats nest on his head, hairy torso, and a thickening, full beard disguising his handsome face. My reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler, Kid Karisma chuckled and called Zach “Cave Man” when he first saw this primal look on the rook. Other than the fact that the beard is covering up way too much handsomeness (Zach, please take a cue from Maverick and clean that shit up!), I’m solidly sold on a feral, primal, diamond in the rough persona, particularly on a dazzling beauty like we know Zach to be. I think it’ll be a crime if he ever cuts his hair short again, because that mass of tangles makes opponents irresistibly drawn to drag his gorgeous ass all over the place by them, which is value added in my book. Hell, I’ll lose it for a smooth chested muscleman like Maverick 4 out of 5 times over a hairy torso, but I’m entirely sold on Zach’s tastefully clippered coat of fur. The ragged and raw edges, the arms length from a comb or scissors, the slightly uncivilized grittiness of Zach is golden as far as I’m concerned. But those trunks…
Those fucking trunks make Zach’s beautiful ass disappear! Fucking crime against humanity!
I’d like to consult with everyone’s favorite wrestling fashionista, Ty Alexander about this, but Ty appears to be giving me the cold shoulder for failing to include a photo of him in my recent post on the asses turning me on in new releases. For the record, I didn’t think there was a promo shot for Ring Release 2 that did Ty’s ass justice. I’d bend him across my knee any day, mind you. But without Ty’s expert eye, I’ll venture to argue that Zach’s trunks in Up Close fail on several points, the most egregious, I think, being that they’re a half size too big.
Maverick’s grooming, skin tone, matching trunks, knee pads and boots framing a perfectly proportioned classic Greek god physiqe.
Take a look at Maverick’s standard black and green pro trunks. They could easily be painted on. They aren’t so tight as to give the zero body fat hunk a Michelin Man look. Just right, suction packed to his gorgeous, muscled ass. Personally, I’d like to see them with about 3 inches lower rise. Ah hell, let’s be honest, I’d give a kidney to see them ripped off his fantastic physique entirely. But to my point, they fit. Perfectly. They accentuate everything right. They are seamlessly part of the wrestler Maverick, framing his gorgeous proportions and complementing every bulge to perfection.
Have I mentioned how much I hate those trunks?
Zach’s trunks, by comparison, bunch up, too much fabric left hanging. We’ve seen how phenomenal his ass looks in the right trunks, so just look how these panties make those gorgeous glutes of his flatten out and disappear. If he squeezed into tights at this point, he’d be a late 80’s commercial for the social faux pas of panty lines. Maverick, on the other hand, could slide his trunked body into tights and be as smooth as… well, a muscleman’s bottom.
Somebody needs to punish Zach until he promises never, ever to wear those trunks again.
The coloring is wrong for Zach as well, I’d say. Washed out, the blotchy lavender makes Zach’s pale skin contrasted with his dark hair all over seem anemic. By comparison, Maverick looks vibrant, 3-dimensional, in full technicolor as the shading and shadows of his mountainous muscles pop. I know for a fact Zach can pop. It’s those fucking trunks.
Pro Wrestlers: Up Close
Maverick delivers three (because he likes doing things in threes) awesomely intimate piledrivers to put the feral rookie down for good at the end of this match. The sight of both of their faces inches away from each other’s crotches, repeated again, and again, is what makes sense of the title of this match for me. What doesn’t make sense to me is those terrible, terrible trunks. Someone, please, rip those travesties off his body… pause…. and then give diamond in the rough Zach Reno a homoerotic wrestling fashion makeover. Please.
I’ve been obsessing lately on magnificently muscled asses. You know the kind I’m talking about. The sort that takes more than two, big, eager hands to grab hold of entirely. That type that contracts into rock hard slabs of squared off granite that could grab hold with a grip like a vice. Of course, the finest specimens belong on the backside of handsome, hunky, athletic wrestlers. Sampling the new homoerotic wrestling releases is feeding my obsession nicely.
BG East Best Butt winner for 2014, Cameron Matthews shows that awesome ass of his as he prepares for Barefoot Babyfaces 1.Kid Karisma shows off why the title of BG East’s Best Butt is always in contention with his ass around. Perfect muscle sculpture as he poses in preparation for Gazebo Grapplers 17.Muscleman Chace LaChance is sculpted beautifully from every angle, particularly from behind, as he prepares for his most explosive match yet, Ring Releases 2.In Fan Fantasy 2, Jonny Firestorm gives this fan exactly what I crave: Chris Bruce’s magnificent, meaty, wedgied ass.Eye of the Cyclone’s serial “Hard as Ice” includes three of my fondest things: a naked, muscle shower scene, beautiful, glistening glutes, and the fantasy man superhero SubZero.Jake Jenkins hot, firm ass is perfectly suited to his acrobatic antics, and that backside may have never looked sweeter than pumped and primed for his Barefoot Babyface battle with Morgan Cruise.And speaking of the Mastodon, his beautiful, beefy butt is a totally different sort, but no less obsession-worthy.Supersized glutes (and bulges) feature prominently in Eye of the Cyclone’s “Who Do You Voodoo?” serial, with superhero partners Flex and HALO forced like puppets on a string to grope and grind one another.Primally hot Zach Reno’s lovely ass is simply stunning as he prepares to get trounced by Kid Karisma in Gazebo Grapplers 17.Hello, Sam Sellers, big, beefy, bulging rookie from BG East’s Mat Scraps 3. Nice ass, rook!In “Idle Hands,” villainous minions of bodiless hands go for the gold in their assault on Eye of the Cyclone’s Archangel. That’s a heavenly, hotly muscled ass!
Stefan Ramos sizzles as he strums his deeply creviced abs, seductively stating the obvious: “They’re so hot!”
I like a hot muscleman who knows exactly what he’s packing. Sizzlingly sexy Stefan Ramos doesn’t just appreciate the accomplishment of having chiseled a crazy fit physique. He doesn’t just congratulate himself on the truly amazing aesthetics of his deeply creviced abs. Strumming his six-pack, unable to tear his eyes away from his own body, the impressive young rookie says what we’re all thinking, though not enough wrestlers quite so explicitly acknowledge. “Great abs,” he mutters, before adding enthusiastically, “They’re so hot!”
Steel Muscle God looks like he’s wondering, momentarily, if he may have bitten off more than he can chew in tall, ripped, dazzlingly beautiful Stefan.
The real reveal in Muscle Domination Wrestling’s Six Pack Bash 7 new release is not the dizzyingly beautiful specimen of Stefan Ramos. It’s his opponent, none other than internet muscle worship phenom Steel Muscle God. I’ve been a fan of SMG for a long time. An occasional subscriber to his personal website (where Stefan makes appearances as “Mike”), I’ve followed the construction of his internet presence since he was just a sexy, snarling, indulgently self-adoring muscle man with a crazy hot accent and an occasional appearance on YouTube in a wrestling singlet (and specs!). I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing SMG for the pages of this blog in 2012. I spilled several quarts of ink musing about the relative merits of SMG and another muscle worship self-promoter, Adam400m, penning a multi-chapter homoerotic wrestling fiction series on the pages of this blog, letting my imagination sort out who would put all of his mouthwatering muscles to work and come out on top and in control. For the record, I always saw SMG putting the competitive English bodybuilder on his knees, banking on SMG’s more passionate enthusiasm for appealing to the wrestling fetish crowd that you an I belong to.
SMG looks like he’s about to cum with the excitement of breaking muscle jobber Stefan in half.
I floated the idea years ago that a homoerotic wrestling producer ought to invest in a plane ticket and get SMG on this side of the Atlantic (that’s the North American side, for those of you reading from elsewhere on the globe) to exploit his wrestling enthusiasm and mouthwatering muscles to their fullest. He’s made some wrestling work trips across the European Union to take big, hot muscle boys of all shapes and sizes, mostly drawn from other YouTube personalities. I personally have a serious hot spot for his most frequent on camera wrestling companion/opponent affectionally known simply as “Wimpy Boy.” But when MDW announced a few weeks back that they were working with SMG directly, I thought my long-time fantasy was about to be realized. Six Pack Bash 7 isn’t quite everything that I’d hoped for SMG’s debut appearance with a fully mobilized homoerotic wrestling company. But it is a distinct pleasure.
SMG grabs hold of the phenomenally sexy muscle glutes of the rookie.
SMG is significantly less impressed with smoking hot Stefan’s abs than Stefan is. It’s long been SMG’s shtick, finding every other man inadequate in comparison to the Steel Muscle God’s physique. Truth be told, entirely objectively speaking (just kidding), Stefan is arguably a more impressive physical specimen than SMG. He’s taller, leaner, more cut. His legs and, in particular, his ass are fucking world class. Did I mention his ass? Holy fuck.
Stefan’s amazingly ripped muscles seem to bring out something new and darker in SMG.
The rookie’s dizzying pretty quotient inspires a furious assault to his gut from SMG. Almost 24 minutes and pretty much a squash from start to finish, this match is a lot like SMG’s self-produced matches over the years. But if you’re familiar with those matches, this is probably good news for you, since you’ve followed his body of work in the past. In many ways, it’s classic SMG, really, with loads of sexy, growling trash talk, self-narrating the action, but even more, narrating his physical superiority. SMG fans dial in to watch him in equal parts for his beauty and his personality, which is a fantastic asset profile for a professional wrestler. In MDW’s Six Pack Bash 7, he delivers what he does best with perhaps a smidge more finesse, seemingly raising his game to live up to high expectations of Muscle Master Kevin back in Boston, or the wider audience of homoerotic wrestling fans this platform will introduce him to. Or, just maybe, sensationally sexy Stefan is genuinely making SMG feel a little… short… on muscle definition, proportion, skin tone. He doesn’t throw down something entirely novel that would really take SMG fans by surprise, but the marginal upping of SMG’s game makes me wonder about halfway through whether beautiful Stefan’s lovely narrow waist, amazingly muscled ass, and razor sharp cuts may be making the Steel Muscle God feel a little insecure by comparison. Did he bite off a little more than he could chew, debuting with a homoerotic wrestling company side by side with a froth-worthy Adonis like Stefan?
Stefan’s physique makes SMG bite his lower lip anxiously.
I must admit to being sorely disappointed that SMG’s MDW debut takes place not in MDW-land. I’m fairly confident that Stefan and the mat room in which they tussle are back in SMG’s backyard in Romania. Rather than integrating SMG into the world of MDW, this appears more of a franchising of MDW, putting Muscle Master Kevin’s imprimatur on a largely pre-existing script and cast from Europe. My fondest fantasy, of course, is seeing SMG climb into a pro wrestling ring and stand face to face with the likes of MMK or Damien Rush, or better yet, give him a week of training with an experienced wrestler like Morgan Cruise or Lon Dumont, or best of all, put him through full-on homoerotic wrestling bootcamp with Kid Leopard, Kid Vicious, and Sailor Rob. Yeah, film that, and I’ll buy two copies. And then line up the likes of Trey Dixon, Kayden Keller, Kid Karisma and Drake Marcos to really enable SMG to live into his fullest potential as a homoerotic wrestling steel muscle god.
Six Pack Bash 7 gets up close and intimate with the muscle destruction!
What MDW does accomplish with their SMG franchise pilot is notable. The camera work and video quality is considerably higher than I ever remember seeing from SMG’s past wrestling exploits. Whoever is operating the camera has a sweet eye for it, zooming in to capture the intimacy of Stefan’s throbbing muscles quivering in SMG’s grasp. I personally find stationary cameras (which is what I’m used to from SMG’s body of work, though I admit it’s been quite a while since I sampled him) lacking, but a handheld can be even more distracting if the action isn’t framed skillfully, if the transitions from one perspective to another are too fast or jerky. The quality of Six Pack Bash 7 is high, though, making this definite value added for SMG fans longing to see his wrestling in a more professional light.
Stefan suffers mightly trapped and impotent, locked between SMG’s amazing thighs.
I’m also delighted to report that gorgeous Stefan sells like motherfucker! As much as I nurse a guilty little infatuation for SMG’s regular punching bag, Wimpy Boy, I fully admit that an SMG squash can feel a little tedious to me. Six Pack Bash 7 does not feel tedious at all, and I give jobber Stefan’s sell at least 75% credit for that. When SMG sucker punches him in the gut, the Adonis doesn’t just double over, he drops to a knee and chokes on the pain, sucking down air, reeling. When various parts of his body are locked up in the vice of SMG’s steel cabled thighs, the rookie jobber’s straining muscles and contorted face, paired perfectly with gasps and grunts and whimpers, are absolutely riveting. He looks truly stunned to be out muscled and so completely humiliated, which makes this genuinely work.
Hot stuff Stefan sells and sells!
Well done to MDW for collaborating with a hard, hot fantasy man with a proven track record and an army of devotees. I have to think this is going to be mutually beneficial to both Muscle Master Kevin and SMG, introducing each other’s fan bases to a new potential outlet. Fans of mat wrestling muscle squashes, saddle up for this ride right away. Those with a little value added kink for hot wrestling hunks with sexy accents, run, do not walk, to download this beauty immediately. But the real winner here, as far as I’m concerned, is a certain breakout star muscleman with the body of a Greek god and the suffering sell of a much, much more experienced muscle jobber. If SMG isn’t ready to sign up for that week of homoerotic wrestling training with the pantheon of kingmakers that I mentioned earlier (and I wonder if he’d be willing to dip his foot into the vulnerability of honest to god give and take of a multidimensional homoerotic wrestling narrative), can I suggest that a certain silky smooth, deeply creviced, bulging, beautiful muscle jobber with a 27″ waist and stunningly shelved muscle ass would make an absolutely sensational addition to any homoerotic wrestling producer’s stable? Perhaps geography is just too big an obstacle to overcome, but I’ll count it a profound disappointment if I never see Stefan Ramos in a pro ring, dripping with sweat, muscled arms trapped in the ropes and shoulder blocked for days (naked) by an accomplished, sadistic hunk with an arsenal of pro wrestling and submission holds and just plain dirty tricks to make him choke on his own humiliation.
I’ve been distracted from blogging for a few weeks, and about the time I get back to it, I find Joe announcing that he’s discontinuing posting regularly on his blog, Ringside at Skull Island. Ringside predates neverland by about half a year, and I’ve often found myself about half a step behind Joe in attending to the hottest and hardest homoerotic wrestling content I can get my hands on. Joe and I have mused about the abundance of overlap between our homoerotic wrestling kinks, and I’ve enjoyed deconstructing the relatively rare points of divergence in what catches our eyes and turns our cranks. I’m unambivalently sorry to see Joe taking a step back. And, truth be told, just a little envious.
For almost 6 years, in addition to curiously exploring my own erotic infatuation with wrestling, I’ve also witnessed a gaggle of aspiring wrestling bloggers start-up their own broadcasts. An elite few fans, and just a couple wrestlers, have kept up the discipline. As I’ve chided the handsome jobber boy Drake Marcos often, sticking to a commitment to blog about wrestling is way harder than it looks. The most consistent voice on the scene for well over 6 years, however, has been Joe. From fresh insights on local indy pro finds to classic and contemporary YouTube wrestling matches to the broadest sampling of full-on homoerotic wrestling companies for gay eyes, Ringside has cut the broadest swath through the the most titillating sources of wrestling kink inspiration. Joe’s interviews with wrestlers and producers have been the best. Following his tastes and eye for hot wrestling has introduced me to new outlets, new genres, and new favorites.
Joe’s biggest get, that I continue to be most jealous of, was his 2011 interview with BG East Boss Kid Leopard.
Based on Joe’s goodbye, I’m holding out hope that we’ll at least occasionally see new contributions to the wrestling blog world at Ringside, when the muse grabs hold of him by the shorthairs. And I know his words and opinions are sincerely valued by many wrestlers and producers, so perhaps the boys on the business end will tempt more of Joe’s genius out of him.
Goldenboy beefcake Austin Cooper is just one of dozens of scorching hot wrestling hunks to sit down with Joe and dish.
Although Ringside at Skull Island may be going dormant, clearly it’s premature to be writing an obituary. As is so often the case, I feel like I know exactly what Joe’s experiencing in saying he’s tuckered out, recognizing himself repeating himself. I’ve often, and recently, wondered if the same is true for me. Do I have anything original to say anymore? My moments of getting distracted from keeping neverland updated, I have to admit, often come with a sense of relief from feeling the pressure of putting word to page, looking for an interesting angle to analyze, keeping you provoked, prodded, entertained, inspired. Google’s nanny-state flirting with turning Blogger into a Disney version of its former frontier days of quirky, kinky self-publishing was exactly what sent me packing up shop and migrating to WordPress over a year ago. If the domestication of homoerotic sensibilities continues to consume us in so many spheres of public and private life, I may also tire out and hang up my commitment to this blog as well someday. For now, I’m sticking it out. And I’m sending my best wishes to Joe and my sincere hope that we’ll continue to hear from him.
If there was a breakout winner in the BG East Best of 2014 poll, I think it had to be Lorenzo “Jake” Lowe. LJL wasn’t on the radar in the individual categories, and yet starred in the best mat match, sexiest match, and best overall match of year. I remember when I first saw young LJL debut in Eli Black’s Wrestler Spotlight DVD. I made a comment to someone with insightful taste in homoerotic wrestling that I thought Victor Paz was the breakout newbie star of that DVD. No, I was firmly corrected, it was absolutely LJL (just LL, at that time), who was destined to hit it big. How right they were! Though I would still love to see much more of sizzling hot Victor…
Tim had better take this jungle boy seriously!
Lorenzo “Jake’s” appeal is both obvious and subtle, I think. Boyishly handsome, lean and phenomenally limber, he’s a pleasure in still frame. And that ass is sizzlingly hot! But LJL’s charms really kick into high gear in motion. He has a calm, steady confidence about him. Before he makes a move, he telegraphs a calculating maturity that contrasts beautifully with his youthful suppleness. There’s no wasted motion, no prodigal showiness. The match begins and LJL punches his time card (and typically his opponent’s clock) and gets down to business.
LJL gets down to business.
In his most recent appearance taking on Tim Messina in Gazebo Grapplers 17, LJL gets down to business quickly and with devastating effect. His jungle boy loin cloth is sexy as hell, but inspires little more than contempt from hot stuff Messina. Tim has the edge in height and weight. As he looks down at the jungle boy bouncing on the balls of his feet in front of him, he clearly thinks he’s got this in the bag. Gimmicks are for chumps, right? If you need a leopard print loin cloth to sell yourself on the mat, you must be a jobber right? Wait, did I say leopard print loin cloth?
Tim learns quickly that Lorenzo “Jake” Lowe is no gimmick.
Poor, poor Tim Messina. He never seems to see it coming in any of his matches. Here again, he’s caught completely flat footed by the swarming offense of the jungle cat. LJL puts him down to the mat in about 3 seconds and chains together somewhere around 50 or so soul crushing, completely devastating offensive moves before Tim knows what’s hit him. LJL goes to town on the pro stud, slowly positioning his shocked opponent deeper and deeper inside his clutches, sliding him tighter and tighter until Tim’s got his lips pressed firmly between LJL’s lovely cheeks in sensationally sexy headscissors. There’s very little cocky self-congratulations about LJL in control. He’s much more like a chess master, visualizing offense four moves in advance, studying, calculating, recalibrating. But based on the massive helpings of humiliation he dishes out, it’s impossible to miss how pleased he is to prove to yet another bigger opponent that epically huge things can come in small packages.
Naughty jungle boy!
Tim is no chump, however. Never a chump. I think I’ve read that he has indy pro wrestling experience, which may account for why he’s a bit flat footed to start on the mat in the gazebo. But he’s not about to allow a lightweight jungle boy squash him. Primarily fueled by brute force and bruised ego, he eventually drives LJL back on his heels and mounts a particularly hot offense of his own. Punishing LJL’s beautiful ass is Tim’s road to retribution. He knocks the air out of his opponent’s lungs and then exploits LJL’s vulnerability by draping the jungle stud over the gazebo railing and spanking his ass like the naughty, naughty boy his is! There’s a moment there where I think the indy pro with the bruised ego very well may just saddle up right then and there and ride that beautiful ass into the sunset. But then again, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Tim go explicitly homoerotic in a match.
By the look on Tim’s face, you get the impression he sort of likes this!
Tim clearly has a taste for upping the ante on when it comes to the humiliating stakes in this match, however. Rocked hard and rolled over to his back, LJL is simply outmuscled as the indy pro folds him over, mounts his face, and rips him apart at the groin. LJL fans who fantasize about everything hiding between the jungle boy’s legs should sit up and take notice, because Tim gives us an all access tour of every inch. He presses LJL to the limit. The jungle boy’s hamstrings quiver, his ankles shoved far outside the gazebo railings. I don’t know how homoerotically explicit Tim’s wrestling dreams may be, but there’s no denying he is getting off on absolutely owning LJL!
Don’t celebrate too soon, Tim!
As is so often the case, Tim pushes his luck a bit too far bullying and lording it over LJL. Some carefully aimed low blows and a tidal wave of near-feral attacks put the jungle cat in charge again. Pissing off LJL is never a good idea. He makes Tim pay hard and brutally for escalating the war of humiliation, tying him into knots and wiping the mat with his wrung out carcass. Tim does not look like he gets off nearly so much on the receiving end of a total ass whooping as he did pitching. You can pretty much see the phrase, “not again,” written across his furrowed brow as LJL force feeds him the mat. Tim is just not as flexible as his jungle cat opponent, but LJL doesn’t give a shit. He drags every joint far beyond Tim’s tolerances, wrenching out tendon-snapping submissions and desperate screams for mercy. “Gimmick” my ass. There’s something primal and powerful and ripped from the pages of Edgar Rice Burroughs about the way LJL picks his opponent apart, piece by piece.
Victory, and defeat, never tasted so good.
I’m still not sure how homoerotically-inclined Tim may be on any other day, but when this jungle boy lays him out and possesses him body and soul, he certainly doesn’t protest when LJL stretches out over top of him and locks lips. Not that it would matter if he tried to protest. He’s just no match for a 135 pound lightweight “kid” in a leopard print loin cloth. But yeah, Tim Messina isn’t exactly suffering in the end of getting schooled by LJL.
The awards show that turns my crank this season is of course, the announcement of the BG East Best of 2014 polls. Well, technically there is no “show,” although I think there should be. Hot contenders show up on the red carpet. Winners announced. Rip ‘n’ strip wrestling breaks out all over the place. Me, with a gallon of baby oil, standing nearby to keep things moving along nicely. Short of that, let’s take a look at the matches that rose to the top of the rankings of BG East fans and voters.
For sexiest match, voters swung toward X-Fights 38, with Drake Marcos and Lorenzo Lowe taking it all wonderfully too personally. I don’t have any problem at all with this victory, even though I finally decided it was Trey “Oscar” Dixon and Skrapper who demanded my vote. There’s a major bitter aftertaste to X-Fights 38, with Drake and LJL slapping down hard, angry resentment from start to finish, so voters seem to have a taste for the passionately punished grudge angle on for sexy this year. I totally get that.
Best Mat Battle was awarded to yet another LJL match, this one against Cameron Matthews in Submissions 9. I could see this coming from a mile way, even though my personal favorite was Drake and Mason’s brutal humiliation session in Passion & Punishment. Cam and LJL are first rate grapplers, stunning contortionist, and damn fine hunks that are a delight to watch, particularly with a liberal coat of sweat dripping off of them. A second Best Mat Battle honor in a row for Cameron, who took the title with Eli Black last year. Total winners.
Voters picked Demolition 17 for Best Ring Match, with Guido Genatto crushing delectable Jake Jenkins, this year’s (and last year’s, and the year before that) Best Babyface. I’m not surprised my pick, Tag Team Torture 17 didn’t take it, but I am surprised the crowd when this direction. Unlike the best mat battle winner, Demolition 17 was total one-way brutality, which I always assume won’t speak to a significant segment of the voters. I think Z-Man & Kip Sorell have got to be picking their jaws up off the ground to be runners up for this one.
On the other hand, Best Squash winners Jonny Firestorm and Nicholas Rush for their Demo 17 match should just prove never, ever bet against Jonny Firestorm (or his fans). I called Jonny & Nicholas total dark horse contenders in this field, and the majority propelled them to the top of the heap. This is a third Best Squash victory in a row for Jonny who seems to own this category as commandingly as he owns his babyface victims. Which again begs the question for me why, oh why, was he not in contention for Best Heel this year?! I also find all sorts of mixed signals about Demo 17’s Guido v JJ match winning for Best Ring and Best Submissions, but Demo 17’s Jonny v Nicholas pulling out Best Squash. Fascinating, perplexing, but again, I say, another reminder to NOT best against Jonny Firestorm.
As I just mentioned, Demo 17’s Guido v JJ again won in the Best Submissions category. As I’ve also mentioned, I’m not sure about exactly what this category is measuring, but I am surprised that this was the match that won. Guido’s match in Demo 18 against newbie Kirk Donahue featured far more terrifying, humiliating, screaming submissions than this one. Cameron and LJL surely won best mat battle for the incredibly acrobatic and insanely hot and dangerous submissions both accomplished submission wrestlers slapped down on each other. And Wet & Wild 7 had submission flying between 5 different hot, wet hunks, including my personal favorite, Mason’s lips crushed against Trey’s balls poolside in a face-to-crotch headscissors. But Guido & JJ? Fantastic match, but I’m just out of step with the majority/plurality on this one.
Best Liplock was awarded to Gabriel Ross & Christian Taylor in Wrestleshack 18. I called this as an incredibly tight field, which I honestly found completely impossible to handicap. There wasn’t a loser among them, though I was blown over hardest by Drake & Ty in Babyface Brawl X and Trey and Skip in Gear Wars 4. However, I’ve never failed to dehydrate whenever I’ve watched Gabriel or Christian in action, and there’s something appropriate about BG East’s resident kisser-king, Christian, taking home this title. Perhaps the key here is that this was Gabriel’s third taste of this title in a row, having won 2 years ago with his lips attached to Drake Marcos, and last year again with Kid Karisma. Fans clearly love watching Gabriel suck face, and I’d give a kidney to lock lips with Christian.
Looks like Guido & JJ nearly grabbed Best Match Overall, but they were runners up to Cameron & LJL’s Best Mat Battle of the year, Submissions 9. There wasn’t a Best Match Overall category in 2012, but last year this award went to the Aryx Quinn and Alexi Adamov’s Ring Revenge. I’m sort of excited to see this award getting doled out to both mat and ring matches over the years. And I predicted Cam and LJL would take this title, despite my tastes lying with Drake v Mason and Trey v Skrapper.
The Demolition series, and particularly Demo 17, certainly was the big winner this year, with 3 victories. Lorenzo “Jake” Lowe also has to be seen as a major league player for starring roles in Best Mat Battle, Sexiest Match, and Best Match Overall, despite being inexplicably absent from the individual wrestler awards. The other major story here seems to me to be the disconnect between best individual wrestler award winners (particularly Best Heel, Best Jobber, Best Debut) and the match awards.
One thing for sure, it was a stunningly hot, incredibly entertaining year in BG East wrestling! Handicapping the field and now going back to review the winners and losers is reminding me all over again what a sensational body of work BG East produced from start to finish in 2014. Congratulations to all the winners, and if any of the losers need some full contact blogger consolation, just let me know. I’ll be happy to soothe, stroke, or knead out any sore spots you’re nursing. And if you haven’t fully appreciated all of these fine homoerotic wrestling matches, consider taking BG East up on the offer to send them your way for 25% off if you order before the end of the month!
The BG East Besties have been announced! I’m about 20 times more excited for this than I am the Oscars. Though if a rip ‘n’ strip tuxedo wrestling match breaks out between Bradley Cooper and Ethan Hawke, I may change my mind. I made my ballot abundantly clear a couple of weeks ago, so let’s look at who the majority of voters picked for the Best at BG East in 2015.
Best Babyface for a 3rd year in a row goes to Jake Jenkins. Little surprise, and there’s nothing to argue with, because JJ is such a sexy, stunning babyface beauty. My vote went into Denny Cartier’s column, but all hail the undefeated best babyface winner, JJ!
In the absence of two time winner Jonny Firestorm, this year’s Best Heel award goes to Kid Karisma. Is it bittersweet for KK that he didn’t get to actually defeat Jonny for the title this year? I’ll never quibble with KK getting lauded, though I am curious that the majority that voted for him didn’t award any of his matches honors this year. My pick, Guido Genatto, scored two matches in the top awards. Of course, no one says any of us are required to maintain any internal consistency in our favorites.
Ripping the title of Best Abs away from 2-time winner Eli Black was Z-Man this year. What a phenomenal field all around, though my adoration will always be for Lon Dumont’s midsection. I will, however, stare for days on end at every inch of Z-Man and marvel at his perpetually phenomenal fitness.
What has to be considered an upset is oh-so-pretty Pete Sharp crowding out 2-time winner Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) for Best Bulge this year. Pete was my pick, but still, I have to think of this as an upset for the man who’s made his massive bulge such a feature of every match. Perhaps the very fact that Pete is so understated about the massive mountain in his pouch is what sells him hardest as Best Bulge of 2015.
Best Butt of 2015 sees the title change hands from 2-time winner Kid Karisma to always butt-beautiful Cameron Matthews. What an incredibly accomplished, top shelf field to choose from, and I have to think Cameron and Kid are always going to be battling back and forth for fan favorite butt. I think this really requires a butt-naked wrestling match between the two of them to help us make the call for 2015.
Best Body this year broke for Austin Cooper. Z-Man has got to be seething to lose his title from last year! Personally, I think this all merely proves that Kid Karisma (my pick) is the most underrated physique in homoerotic wrestling. However I have no trouble at all seeing what the majority of voters saw when the tapped goldenboy Austin for the honors.
Jobber of the Year goes to last year’s Debut of the Year, Kip Sorell. Rio Garza wasn’t even under consideration to defend the title after owning it the past 2 years. It was a seriously tight competition, and Kip was on the receiving end of some of the hottest beatdowns of 2014, without a doubt (even though NONE of them make an appearance in the best match awards!). I still say Drake Marcos is my top jobber pick, mostly because it irritates him so much to be called jobber, which I think is a supremely awesome quality in a jobber.
Debut of the Year saw the rest of you agreeing with me that Ty Alexander burned up the scene his rookie year. Clearly, one can’t “defend” his best debut title, but just for context, Ty joins the likes of Eli Black (Class of 2012) and Kip Sorell (Class of 2013). I expect to see some amazing things from the sophomore year of adorable Ty.
Don’t forget that all of the nominated matches this year are on sale for 25% off through the end of the month. I’ll take a look at the best match winners next…
Sidelineland 