2014 in the Rear-View Mirror

Facebook has been offering to package a graphic presentation of how great 2014 was for me. FB doesn’t know shit. Despite ending on a bad note, though, it is certainly true that a lot of great things happened in recently past year. Remembering the best helps put the worst in perspective, so here are my top 10 favorite moments of 2014.

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10. In May, Gio Benitez posted a desperately anticipated (by me) shirtless pic. Hot newsboys always grab my attention and stick in my memory, and the dubiously philanthropic fad of dumping buckets of icewater on oneself provided some sweet teases of hot newsboy muscles this year, including Gio and David Muir. But no news was quite so newsworthy as beefy sophomore newsboy Gio Benitez releasing a group photo with him right in the middle showing off his bare, beautiful, meaty pecs.

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Jose made sure I also saw this sweet tease Gio released for New Year, with Gio’s muscles pumping and bulging as fellow fantasy man Ryan Hughes “trains” him.

9. In March I enjoyed a novel interview with adorable rookie jobber Ty Alexander all about homoerotic wrestling fashion.  It was the first fashion-themed interview I’ve done, and Ty was all earnestness and adorability in dishing out fashion advice and sharing copious photos of his personal collection, both with his bodacious bubble butt in and out of them.  Ty continues to impress me as a true native of the homoerotic wrestling universe, and I keep warning Drake Marcos to keep an eye out for this ingenue rising from the fresh meat counter to pick off more established young talents as the young wrestling stud on top of the fan-crush pile.  Sure, with Ty it’s all about fashion. And wrestling. And, well, Ty. Just what will he get up to in 2015, one wonders…

 

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8. In May, Clint Morgan sat down with me for a compelling and controversial interview. It should come as no surprise that brutal beast Clint pulls no punches, musing on both the dos and don’ts of the homoerotic wrestling world according to Clint. I’m still praying for that rip-and-strip match between Clint and Tyrell Tomsen to be realized in 2015… in my living room.

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7. There are a few wrestlers who I have been angling to interview for a while. Perhaps in 2015 I’ll finally nail down some of those nasty cock teases. But a highlight of 2014 was the reward of tenacity and ingenuity to overcome unusual obstacles and have a thoughtful interview with giant killer Jayden Mayne in October. Hollywood handsome and shockingly brutal, wiry Jayden has plan to beef up and knock the legs out from underneath more big bruisers in the coming year. Cannot wait!

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6. In May, homoerotic wrestling fanatic and friend of neverland, Jose, launched his sensational, bilingual homoerotic wrestling blog, La Sustancia P. Jose has carved out a delightful corner of all of the musings about the wrestling we love that’s all his own. The charts and lists and unstoppable powers of deduction bring the art of a homoerotic wrestling infatuation firmly into the realm of science. And science never, ever turned me on as hard as when I’m reading La Sustancia P.

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5. August saw the fulfillment of a long-dreamed of moment for me, the on camera appearance of Kid Karisma’s naked ass. The answer of how many times must Kid K win the “best butt” year-end award before those glutes show up unobstructed is 2. In Undagear 22, my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler burned up the mat and crushed and demolished lucky, lucky, lucky Ray Naylor brutally. In a moment of generosity, though, Kid K celebrated his victory by peeling off his sweat soaked undagear and strolling slowly off the mat, bare assed and epically beautiful. I’m hoping this story arc swings into 2015 with actual bare assed, full contact wrestling action from Kid Karisma.

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4. Some interviews are the result of begging, pleading and stealing on my part. And then some of my favorite interviews absolutely fall into my lap. When Chuck Flying Tiger Collins dropped me a note appreciating this blog in November, I snapped up the opportunity eagerly. Chatting with the Flying Tiger was like sitting down with an old friend, the back and forth flowing easily. Where I’m often battling nerves during interviews, Chuck had me kicking up my feet and coasting delightfully through the past, present and potential future of homoerotic wrestling. And then I nearly fell off my seat when Chuck sent me a couple of photos of his shirtless self today. Damn, damn, damn, I’m aching to see a Flying Tiger comeback in 2015!

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3. In February I saddled up for my first three-way interview, sitting down with both Mason Brooks and Drake Marcos. Coming off of their sizzling hot Passion and Punishment match, I was counting my lucky stars to get to deconstruct their phenomenal confrontation from both handsome hunks’ perspectives. Little did I know I’d have a tiger by the tail in trying to steer both cocky studs through the same conversation. And while I was fully expecting Mason and Drake to throw shade each other’s way, I was sincerely shocked to find Drake irked and annoyed at me, despite my every effort to heap praise and adoration on the world class jobber boy. The interview turned into one of my favorite moments of the year for both the hotness I knew would ensue, as well as the heat that took me entirely by surprise.

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2. Speaking of unexpected, my October interview with Shane McCall was simply the hottest interview I’ve ever conducted. I’ve been a slack jawed fanboy of Shane’s from the first moment I discovered BG East. So my heart was already a-fluttering from the get-go when I started talking with him about his epic return to the ring in Catch Weight 6, where he had some harsh words (and harsher holds) for cocky young jobber Ty Alexander.  Shane’s retrospective on his early days in wrestling, his insights into the spirit and spirituality of homoerotic wrestling, and his candid thoughts about the near future of the business had me hard, but when Shane sucked me into his big, hairy, bear daddy fantasies, I was literally swooning. I had to hydrate often and towel often even more often, and if you’ve read the interview, it should come as little surprise it was a highlight of my year/decade. Shane also sent me New Year’s best wishes with this photo (above) attached, proving once again he can bend my back across his knee and go to town on my abs any day or night he wants!

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1. Hands down my favorite moment of the year was meeting Drake Marcos and climbing into the BG East ring to settle a blogger v wrestler score that was brewing all year long. The whole visit was outstanding, and the entire match, including getting crushed hard between Drake’s crazy sexy legs, was thrilling. But if I had to narrow the whole thing down to that one, distinct, pristine moment that rises to the top, the very best of the best was stepping back to admire the jobber trapped in the ropes, then grabbing my phone in one hand and a handful of Drake’s hair in the other and snapping this keepsake.

So, sure it was “a year to remember” for so many reasons, and even this little jaunt down memory lane turns me on with memories that will surely get me hard for years to come. When it comes to outstandingly memorable moments in homoerotic wrestling blogging, I’d go so far as to say that this one is going to be very tough to beat. But I’m holding out hope that 2015 will have even more awesome, outstanding moments in store.  Thanks to all of the fine men who were part of this year’s fun, including all of the hunks who let me interview them, all of my fellow bloggers who kept me informed and motivated, and one particular vanquished buck who proved once again that the pen, and my chokehold, are mightier than the jobber.

Flying Tiger

There are some wrestlers that predate my discovery of homoerotic wrestling sufficiently to be cemented in my perception as having simply “always been there.”  Chuck “Flying Tiger” Collins is one of those wrestlers who had already come and gone from active duty at BG East before I ever discovered them, but at no point was he forgotten.  I’ve spent considerable time in the back catalogs of BG East and the “vintage” photo montages in the Arena, and regularly has Flying Tiger grabbed me by the balls and stared me down.  Gorgeous, athletic, confident, he always seemed ripped from the pages of an 80’s Playgirl cover and slapped into the middle of my wrestling fantasies. To get the opportunity to stumble across him online and swiftly apply my full-throttle appeal for an interview in an instant was a thrill, but nowhere near the delight of getting to correspond with this classic hunk and see what’s become of him, and whether he’d be willing to join the ranks of classic wrestlers making an encore appearance in the ring.

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Classic Chuck “Flying Tiger” Collins

Bard: Chuck “Flying Tiger” Collins!  What an unexpected thrill and honor to get to chat with you. Classic BG East wrestling fans will remember you from the inaugural Motel Madness and many matches in the Private Bouts collection. I feel like I should know this, but tell me how you earned the name Flying Tiger.

Chuck: Bard, it’s my pleasure to get a chance to chat with you, especially since it’s been so long since I’ve done any wrestling vids.  As to my name, “The Flying Tiger,” I was known for some pretty wild aerial moves in the day, so “flying” kinda stuck.

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There’s a reason they called him “Flying Tiger!”

Bard: It’s sometimes tough to track when BG East matches were taped. How long has it been since you last slipped into a tight pair of trunks to grapple on camera?

Chuck: Maybe 25 years since my last filming… Wow, until I just said it, didn’t realize it was that long ago.

Bard: That’s incredible! Who was your the last opponent you faced?

Chuck: I believe my last opponent was Cruze, one of my only matches in the ring up in Massachusetts.

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Private Bout 119 – Chuck gets tortured by Cruze

Bard: Cruze was so fucking dangerous!  Then again, you also wrestled Kid Leopard, Andy Bailey, Brooklyn Bodywrecker, TNT, Scott Rogers. As a handsome babyface like you, who worked you over hardest?

Chuck: They were all great opponents. I recall bass Wallace worked me pretty hard in Motel Madness, but Kid leopard probably worked me over the hardest.  Only one match on film, and it was an epic battle.

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In Private Bout 6, The Flying Tiger gave Kid Leopard a run for his money…
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…but Kid Leopard worked him over good!

Bard: It was!  If I’m not mistaken, KL had several swipes at you, though only that one private bout 1-on-1.  He and Raw Deal tag teamed all over you and TNT, and when you faced Andy Bailey, KL intervened in that match as well. What do you think it is about you that drew such viciousness from the heel-in-chief?

Chuck: I think it was two fold. My cocky attitude for a baby face, but my skill level backed up my words, and KL stepped in wherever he could to silence me, especially when I was beating his boys! I know in my first match with Andy Bailey, he didn’t win a fall. Totally destroyed him, and it didn’t sit well with him or KL. That’s when I think they planned on KL interfering in the second match with Andy.

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Private Bout 7, Kid Leopard made sure Chuck didn’t repeat his squash of KL’s good buddy, Andy Bailey.

Bard: Fuck, I love the melodrama and larger than life personalities that make homoerotic wrestling so intense! I also have major love for hot, handsome baby face heroes like you that can more than hold their own. Who do you think carries the baton for the skilled, stacked, must-be-taken-seriously babyfaces wrestling these days?

Chuck: Wow, there are so many talented wrestlers these days, Cameron Matthews, Jake Jenkins, and forgive me if I leave anyone out, but two that stand out now are Mason Brooks and Kayden Keller – both very talented leaning toward heels, but baby aced and great skill.

Bard: You have fantastic taste! That’s an excellent sample of very fine, skilled babyfaces. Which of those hunks would you pick to time travel back 25 years to tag team with you against KL and Raw Deal?

Chuck: Very interesting question, Bard. I would probably have to go with Cameron if I was selecting purely on talent, and he’s recently been very aggressive in his matches, so he and I versus KL and Raw Deal I think would be a great choice.

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Back to the Future Babyface Tag Team to beat: Chuck Collins & Cameron Matthews

Bard: I agree, that sounds like an awesome choice. Cameron and you would make a fantastic, and stunningly handsome, tag team! There have definitely been many new names and new wrestling venues, new series and technologies shaping homoerotic wrestling over the past 25 years. What are your observations about what the biggest changes have been overall? Have they been changes for the better?

Chuck: Again, WOW, “so many changes” is an understatement. I think the biggest changes have been in technology. The quality of the product is so much better today. I was involved in the infancy of the underground homoerotic sport. HD, DVD, now streaming and downloading, all making for a better product as well as better availability. As to the wrestlers, I think they have gotten bigger, more physically developed as a whole. The only place I think some are lacking is in actual skill, very few can sell the match the way we old timers used to. Not all, but the really talented pool of wrestlers now is a small group indeed.

Bard: I don’t know how much it may be nostalgia, but I sometimes miss the rawer, rougher video quality and even the more improvised venues from earlier days. There was an intensity and edge that I don’t always sense in higher definition, where missed moves and every last blemish and mole are crystal. How did you join the ranks of BGE?

Chuck: I was introduced to BGE when I phoned KL telling him I was going to be in Mass for an extended period of time.  Now this was back when Hull, Mass was the BGE home site – very primitive compared to their home base now.  After a brief interview, I was set up to go up against Andy Bailey, and the rest, as they say, is history.

Bard: Had you already been a fan, then? Did you come with a wrestling background?

Chuck: I did some wrestling in school, lots of fooling around with friends, but my real background in pro was going Thursday nights down to the arena with my family to watch the matches.  Some of the old wrestlers worked out at a gym I knew, and I would watch them, then I’d try to replicate what I saw.  BGE just helped me perfect it all. And I was a fan of BGE, and was gratdful for the opportunity to try out.

Bard: Clearly you fit right in! Attitudes about sexuality have changed since then (in some ways, at least). Do you think changing levels of stigma in society in general have shaped some of the evolution of a gay-oriented wrestling company like BG East?

Chuck: I would hope so. I know there is a lot more openness now about being a wrestler for gay-oriented companies that are out there.

Bard: A regular theme I hear repeated from nearly every BG East wrestler I’ve talked to has been the esprit de corps that develops among the wrestlers there. Did you connect on a personal level with any wrestlers in particular?

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Despite slapping Chuck down for the title in Private Bout 6, Kid Leopard remains a friend.

Chuck: Many, starting at the top with KL.  We still keep in touch, not nearly as often as we used to, but every now and again. I’ll get a text from a few of the other guys every now and again, just to catch up and see what’s going on, so I would definitely agree that the camaraderie that developed between the wrestlers led to numerous friendships along the way.

Bard: Are you still in fight shape today?

Chuck: Well all depends what you call “in fight shape.” I’m currently at 150 lbs, 5’8″, and 8% body fat. I workout 5 times a week using a dumbbell routine that keeps me pretty solid. Let me send you some pics and let you be the judge.

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Chuck “Flying Tiger” Collins today.
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Flying Tiger looks ready to rumble!

Bard: Holy shit you look fantastic! You are ripped and rocking! Any of the current crop of competitors you wouldn’t mind getting your hands on?

Chuck: Thanks, and as far as the new guys go, I’d love to get back in the ring with a bunch of them, starting with Cameron. Would love to tangle with Jake Jenkins, Ethan, possibly even Mason Brooks, Kayden Keller. And who wouldn’t want to get in the ring with Ty Alexander?

Bard: Would the Flying Tiger still be an upright babyface hero today?

Chuck: I’m thinking I’d lean more towards a babyfaced heel these days. I’ve become meaner in my old age.

Bard: I was hoping you’d say babyface heel!  Can we talk a minute about exactly how you’d handle adorable Ty?

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The Flying Tiger has plans for adorable rookie Ty Alexander (photo credit and thanks to Michael von Redlich)

Chuck: Sure, he’s very cocky in the ring, and the best thing to do for that is let them get confident, then turn the whole thing around on them. A low blow here or there, then a DDT for emphasis.  That should quiet him some.

Bard: Hell and YES! I’d say bend that bubble butt over your knee and spank the cocky stud until he cries, too. So I realize I just have the pic as reference here, but you look completely in shape to climb back into the ring. If the call came, would you join the encore career hunk daddies like Shane McCall and show the youngsters how to sell? And could I get front row seats?!

Chuck: I’d love to.  I think some of us could show these young punks a thing or two.

Bard: I can’t agree more. I have to think there’s plenty of audience for that, as well. I’m also sure I’m not the only one powerfully provoked by hearing and seeing the Flying Tiger. Anything you’d like to say to the fans who will be popping their cork to read this interview?

Chuck: Just that it’s been an honor and a pleasure speaking with you.  It’s nice to know our pioneer work in the field hasn’t been forgotten, and it’s always nice to meet real fans.

Bard: It’s been a profound pleasure to chat with you, and you are most definitely not forgotten. In fact, I’m 100% certain there are all new fans and fantasies ignited by your ripped, 8% body fat, hottie self today! And seriously, although I know KL strictly forbids outside spectators at BG East matches, please lobby for me should you get the call to spank some young upstart’s bubble butt!

Chuck: Will do! And thanks again.

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Chuck “Flying Tiger” Collins is still pumped and primed for wrestling action.

The Crowd Who Seem to Favor This Sort of Wrestling

“And welcome once again to BG Wrestling at Campus in beautiful Cambridge, Massachusetts in the heart of brain country, I guess you would say, halfway between Harvard and MIT.” Announcer and color commentator Bob Wood fills in all the juicy details over the PA system that set the stage for “Live at Campus.” He lets us know who the heels are and why their babyface opponents are motivated to try to conquer them. This classic club footage from a BG East catalog release from 1990 is pro wrestling entertainment that makes impressive use of a dance floor, a mat, and some slack ropes. Five matches comprise this DVD, with some classic, classic athleticism from the likes of Matt Carlton, Tiger Chuck Collins, Kid Leopard, Scott Rogers (before he turned Dark), and the Brooklyn Bodywrecker.

Regular readers here know that I have a running fantasy of live action homoerotic wrestling. I know of no live action homoerotic wrestling venues within several thousand miles of me, so watching classic club wrestling in front of a curious, sometimes enthusiastic crowd of gay guys in Live at Campus revives that lust to watch up close and personal wrestling action.

The crowd that night is a mix of curious gawkers, guys chatting each other up without much interest in the wrestling, and a smattering of hardcore wrestling fans who start showing up later in the card. In the Fallen Angel v Tiger Chuck Collins match, the fans slowly warm up to their role in this scenario. One angry fan, fed up with Collins’ seeming inability to defend himself against his masked opponent, throws trash ontop of Collins while the the tiger-striped-one is getting the crap beat out of him at the start of round 3.

When Kid Leopard and Scott Rogers face off for a title match in the second half of the card, the crowd around the makeshift ring has grown thicker, rowdier, and more attentive. A hot, bearded hunk with big pecs and a sleeveless t-shirt shows up ringside just as the action starts. Like a growing number of the fans gathering ringside, he’s got a look about him that makes me think he’s got to be one of us who enjoys his wrestling kink. He pumps his fist, flexing an impressively thick bicep, and shouts in celebration when KL is introduced as the hometown boy with a bad attitude.

The hot boy with the beard fades into the crowd partway through KL’s successful title defense, but from the moment that the final match is announced, the battle for the “Bruiser Weight Championship Belt,” he’s back and furiously stakes out his claim to a front row, unobstructed view of the action.  This action consists of Maine native Terry Mercen, in white trunks and boots and a white satin jacket (Bob Wood gives Terry’s hardworking, straight-up babyface credentials), facing down an astonishingly young, ripped, gorgeous Brooklyn Bodywrecker in red trunks and black boots. BBW is sporting his perennial “fuck ’em up” attitude that he dishes out with relish to his opponent, the announcer, the fans… pretty much anyone and everyone.

Before the match has technically started, BBW ambushes Terry from behind when the Maine grizzly tries to take his white satin jacket off. When BBW starts to choke Terry with it, some heel fans initially cheer, but things quickly quiet down as BBW’s mauling of the man in white is visually simply stunning.  After an astonishingly relentless battering of his caught-off-guard opponent, BBW hops to his feet, sets his snarling sights on none other than the hot, bearded hunk in the front row, and points his finger at him. It looks like an aggressive move, but there’s no way to really tell what BBW is saying to the hunk in the crowd. A match dedication, perhaps? A promise to deal with those hot pecs next? Whatever BBW says, the pec boy seems to cheer that much more enthusiastically with every cruel stomp, kick, and slam that BBW delivers. A step-over toe hold looks like it’s about to snap poor Terry’s knee in two, to the rising “ooo’s” and “aaah’s” of the appreciative crowd. A double knee drop to Terry’s hamstrings clearly titillates more than one spectator. “I like that! Give him another one!” an excited voice rises an octave above the crowd.

The boy in the white sleeveless t-shirt, the one with the big pecs and bulging biceps, gets more and more animated as the match progresses. When Terry launches an impressive rally that has BBW reeling in fall 2, the hot stud in the front row gives the ref an earful, complaining about some clearly fictitious rule infraction that the fan believes Terry used to gain the upper hand. But when BBW bounces back from that unexpected 2nd fall pin to grab hold of this match with both hands in fall 3, his #1 fan is literally roaring. Actually roaring, yes. He gives BBW a “thumbs-up” of encouragement to start round 3. When BBW battles back to control the match momentum, pec boy pumps his fists and flexes those meaty biceps encouragingly. Every slam, every kick has the hunk outside the ring cheering and pumping his fists harder.  When BBW bodyslams Terry onto the wooden bar tables at ringside, all the heel fans rejoice. His over-the-knee backbreaker on Terry has the muscled hunk in the front row pumping his fists again with a big, toothy smile stretching ear to ear. When BBW cranks out a humiliating final fall submission from Terry, his #1 fan celebrates furiously, reaching over the barrier to slap BBW’s hand in congratulations. When BBW, as is his way, goes back and muscles out a post-victory piledriver on a completely helpless Terry, muscleboy at ringside is laughing and applauding feverishly.

“The bodywrecker has developed quite a little following here this evening,” announcer Bob Wood can’t help but note. “And now he accepts the BG Bruiser Weight Championship belt… holds it high… and accepts the cheers of those in the crowd who seem to favor this sort of wrestling.”

Live action homoerotic wrestling has got to be the sexiest venue possible. When there’s chemistry like the chemistry BBW clearly has with his muscleboy fan in the front row, my arousal skyrockets. The adrenaline rush of the crowd egging on the combatants, the call-and-response between wrestlers and their fully engaged boosters, it all makes the story extend outside of the literal ring. There’s an extra pump from proxy champions fighting it out, carrying the standard, standing for the virility and savvy and will to dominate of everyone on “their side.” Like the hot, bearded boy with the meaty pecs, I’m certainly part of that crowd that “seems to favor this sort of wrestling!”

Playing to the Audience

Kid Leopard v Matt Carlton – BGE  Live in San Francisco

Today’s BG East Arena update features several galleries from the vintage Live at San Francisco collection of matches. In addition to reminding me that I need to get a copy of these live audience matches featuring some of the early lions, it also reminds me that I really like homoerotic wrestling in front of an audience.

Brooklyn Bodywrecker v Scott Rogers & Matt Carlton – BGE Live in San Francisco

A reader recently chatted with me about the concept of gay wrestling in front of an audience. We both agreed that the concept really moves us. I’m not entirely certain what all the moving parts are that multiply the eroticism of homoerotic wrestling with a live audience, but I have to believe it has to do with the shared intimacy of watching arousing, hardbodied athletes playing to a mutual kink.

Reed/DJ v Rouge/Tucker – Naked Kombat – December 23, 2009

Naked Kombat taped three incredibly hot matches in front of an audience before calling that venue quits. Their boys always got hurt when they wrestled in front of a crowd of cheering fans. Did the kombatants experience an extra rush of adrenaline when the boys in the stand roared with delight at each homoerotic hold? Did they find themselves trying a little too hard, pumped a little too much, with a jeering, cheering, hungry audience egging them on like the crowd that inevitably forms around schoolyard scraps? Maybe that’s part of the equation of what turns me on, as well. There’s an extra dose of adrenaline with an audience watching. There’s not only the fantastically intimate relationship hammered out between the wrestlers, but also the relationship between the wrestlers and the audience. Like a threesome, it adds something exotic and extra intense to an already erotically charged moment.

Reed/DJ v Rouge/Tucker – Naked Kombat – December 23, 2009

My recent introduction to the illustrated storybooks Sexfights at the BG Arena captures this ménage à trois sentiment quite nicely. The story of one night in an explicitly gay, live audience, ring wrestling arena, suggests that the wrestling studs fighting to cum out on top experience a synergistic, orgasmic psychic connection with the audience, carried across the sound waves of the audience’s shouts of encouragement, instruction or derision. The wrestlers, financially rewarded on a sliding scale based on how hardcore the victory sex gets, find themselves nudged further in brutality and passion as a result of the boys in the chairs, aroused and enthralled at the live, homoerotic, 110% wrestling kink action occurring just a few feet in front of them.

Chuck Tiger Collins v Fallen Angel – BGE Live on Campus

So perhaps a Sexfights at BG Arena scenario might have trouble finding an insurance carrier (which I assume was the real nail in the coffin of Naked Kombat’s live audience matches). And perhaps as homoerotic wrestling has become more established, there’s less opportunity for the ragged spontaneity of a Wrestlefest, for example.

Brad Rochelle v Patrick Donovan – BGE Wrestlefest 2

But I’ll keep a candle burning for the hope to someday buy my ticket for a ringside seat to watch the kink infused melodrama of homoerotic wrestling played out close enough for me to smell the sweat. Surely the seats would be packed for an opening bout with, say, my favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division Lon Dumont swagger out and climb commandingly through the ropes to work his bodybeautiful, indypro-informed magic on – how about – BGE veteran delight, Patrick Donovan. Patrick would be rewarded by those of us in the seats for copping some gratuitous feels of LD’s gorgeous pecs, but LD would surely pound his amorous opponent into a sweaty, exhausted, defenseless pulp, earning even more awed adoration from us in the crowd. Match 2, I’m thinking, should be a little kinkier. Let’s say Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), eager to show up LD, climbs into the ring next, against Grapple 101 emcee, Ashley Ryder. Ashley lets us in the seats know that if he conquers my top contender for the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division – he’ll give us all what we’ve been swooning for for more than a decade: an unobstructed view of Mr. Joshua’s stripped cock and balls. Hell, the crowd would turn on Mr. J in a flash, wouldn’t we!? Our blood would pump faster with each small advantage that Ashley managed to claim over Mr. J. When Ashley found himself bullied and slammed by his opponent, we’d roar in protest, desperate for our fresh-faced champion to deliver the goods he cockily promised. Knowing Ashley, sooner or later, boots would be stripped and the tension would rise over his fetish for claiming his opponent’s socks. And, let’s face it, Mr. J would likely capitalize on Ashley’s single-minded devotion to his gimmick, beating the Britboy’s face into the turnbuckle, tying him in the ropes and battering him with every appendage, before choking him out in the center of the ring as we catcalled, watching our hopes to see Mr. J’s goods fade with Ashley’s consciousness. But as full of himself as Mr. J is, he isn’t immune to the adrenaline rush of the roaring crowd. We’d chant, “take it off, take it off, take if off,” making the adonis pause as he’s stepping through the ropes to make his exit. “Take if off, take it off, take it off,” we’d chant like devotees of our druid god, weaving a spell so powerful that Mr. J, in his lust to be worshipped, couldn’t refuse. He’d tease us. He’d start to strip, and then wag his finger at us, plucking our pumping heartstrings like a harpist. Take it off, take it off, take it off… we’d keep whispering, breathlessly, desperately, until his eyes closed in rapture at the sound of our worship, and as if with a mind of their own, his hands peeled his skin tight trunks down his long, muscled legs. He’d grab his balls in his right hand and his cock in his left, giving them a habitual tug, before lacing his fingers behind his head and flexing his eight-pack directly over top of Ashley’s prone body, soaking in the impassioned shouts and grunts of our climactic adoration.

Dennis the Menace v Jay Austin – BGE – Paradise 2

Holy crap! I got completely lost there in my own fantasy of a BG live audience event, now didn’t I? Surely there’s got be at least another two or three more matches on the card, but I’ll save the rest of that fantasy for another day. For now, let me just say again that I think there’s an awesome chemistry to live audience wrestling, as evidenced by straight-up mainstream pro wrestling profits, that would only be that much more appealing in undisguised homoerotic fare. My candle is lit for a return of live audience action to gay wrestling, and me with my ticket to a front row seat.