I’ve been re-reading my recent posts (is that narcissistic?), and noting a pattern. A couple of weeks ago I was infatuated with pecs. It appears that I’ve now become fixated on butts. I’m not always all about big muscle butts. Lots of times a tight, compact caboose is entirely satisfying. But from recent posts, I’m starting to put my finger on (“ON” I said!) big, solid, muscular asses as my new body-part obsession.

In wrestling, a muscled ass can provide nice leverage… or a helpful handhold. More than a couple of the matches in my wrestling fiction feature face-sitting. I wrote Brad Pitt exacting a particularly humiliating face-sitting submission from Sean Faris well before I’d heard that Brad won “best celebrity butt” in some online poll. I’ve adored his ass ever since A River Ran Through It.

A beautiful reverse, face-first head scissors is, of course, an opportunity for a nice, wrestling butt to come in handy. Chris Geary has a nice variation on a figure-4 head scissors that makes me envy the jobber.

Of course there are more gorgeous butts than there are gorgeous butts wrestling, so we just have to use our imaginations. Here are just a few of the butts I find exemplary, which I’d love to see getting put to good use in the ring. First, I once again wax poetic as I ponder Mehcad Brook’s bodacious butt.

Sexy Black Dudes has several exposés (so to speak) on ample asses. I like this angle on model Brandon Parker.

Mario Lopez sports a fantastic ass (thank you Nip/Tuck). His dimples just cry out for someone to beat him senseless in the ring, though. I enjoyed writing a match between Mario and his Broadway rival, Nick Adams. The two of them got press for a muscle-off a couple of years ago, so I wanted to throw them both in the ring and see who came out on top. Personally, I’d be happy to just see the two of them walking away (slowly).