Giving it a Tug

More shots like this from the filming of Henry Cavill as the Man of Steel just keep winding me up harder and harder! Holy. HELL. I don’t know what Superman plot features so much facial hair on Clark Kent, but this look is really, really (really) turning me on!

I haven’t pictured hot Henry as sporting a full beard in my homoerotic wrestling imagination… yet. With these images seared into my retinas and filed away as priceless memories in the erotic stacks in the back of my brain, I’m strongly suspecting he’ll show up with lots of fur the next time he graces the pages of the Producer’s Ring (which, by the way, Google techs now tell me should be up and accessible for everyone who was recently having trouble accessing the site).

Henry Cavill with a full beard is also sending me diving into my search engines for some homoerotic wrestlers with beards. I’m not talking goatees, though I have been known to have a major crush on a goatee before). Not the soul patch (god forbid). Not the stash (though I must say I’d be up for a ride on this one…). Know what? I’m finding them a rather rare species.

Is it the stubble burn of close contact and lots of friction that makes them unpopular? I see tons of boys with enough stubble to hurt when rubbed the wrong/right way. But to really qualify as a “beard,” and not just a lazy ass 5 o’clock shadow, I’m finding precious little.  There are some “sculpted” beards that just barely qualify in my book. BG East’s Jarel Andretti, for example, has a pencil thin outline that stretches from his sideburns all the way to his chin. Same goes for his beefy opponent Jaguar, depending on the lighting. So I’ll give them partial credit for the beard (and say, yes, yes that’s one hot jobber beatdown!).

Thunder’s Arena has a whole bunch of boys who look like they just got lazy with the razor that morning, but a few who clearly have put enough forethought into sculpting the buzz to just barely skate across the line into beard territory. Big, beautiful, bubble-butted Dozer for example.

I’ll even give massive and gorgeous Mario a nod as a bearded beast, perhaps not because his facial hair looks entirely intentional, but because he’s fucking huge and I’d be afraid that he’d crush me like a grape for implying that his scruff doesn’t count.

But the real rare breed in this zoo is the full, furry, lumberjack beard like Mr. Cavill is sporting these days. The thick, hairy fur that typically accompanies hairy pecs and legs – that’s the stuff that I’m jonesin’ for right now. Ace Hanson’s appearance against Uno, for example, comes to mind. So sad to see Ace has been moved to the ranks of “alumni” since I checked out of Thunder’s last spring.

Hairy beast Rex reminded me of Steve Reeves playing Hercules in the films that turned me gay (not really). But really, Rex does give me a Steve Reeves hit, just like he gave Sledge a picture perfect bone crushing bearhug in Bodybuilder Battle 35.

Naked Kombat’s Scout has to be mentioned for the manly facial hair. He simply doesn’t have the porn body (well, not the gay porn body) that I tune into NK for, but in the sport of spotting the rarified form of a beareded homoerotic wrestler, Scout gets a nod.

Possibly the hottest bearded wrestler I’ve had the pleasure to watch (over and over) is the one hit wonder from Can-Am’s Montreal Muscle Bear Fights, Bruno Sinclair. His battle with silky smooth studpuppy Ricardo Dias puts me in precisely the same mood as where I’m picturing Henry Cavill heading in my homoerotic wrestling imagination.  There have GOT to be more bearded homoerotic wrestlers out there. Who am I missing?

And finally, I simply have to say that it’s as if Henry is reading this blog. Just when I was complaining that there are simply not enough pin up shots of hot hunks from behind in order to marvel at a wide, rippled muscle back, our future Mr. Man of Steel goes and lingers like this long enough for several camera shots. Full nelson, anyone!?

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