There’s been a pretty insane rush to marry around my neck of the woods this weekend. Another judge determines that blatant discrimination enshrined at any level of state law is bullshit, and the flood gates bust open. Despite my long-standing skepticism about the impact of same-sex marriage on liberty, and the screwed up priorities of aggressively pushing for marriage rights while we have no universal fair employment or housing rights, I must admit it’s quite an adrenaline rush to see moes lined up to marry. I can almost literally feel domesticity creep over me. The taming of same-sex partnerships, shoe-horning the vast diversity of them into the constraints of acceptable heterosexual expectations threatens even my more radical commitments to the need for revolution rather than reform. With negotiated fidelity on the line, in the face of closeting the all-male menage a trios, the couples that date thirds, the contractual anything-goes-out-of-town loving relationships, I can just feel the gravitational pull of whitebread hetero monogamy built on centuries of religious strictures consuming us alive. As a personal commitment to keep the “alternative” in gay, let me just affirm for me and my special someone (who reads these pages, even though we never really talk about them) a few of the wrestling hunks for whom a legally “libertarian” inclusion into the structure of one-man-one-man loving would be instantly out the window, should the opportunity arise for some extracurricular (or, hell, three-way) activities. I’m sure absolute monogamy is great for many, but here’s a sample of who could climb into my/our bed anytime.
Mitch Colby… he’s all mine!Darius… I’d share him with my partner.Landon Conrad… I think I’d have to have him all to myself, or possibly with another one of his gorgeous pornboy stud buddies.Trey Dixon and Skrapper… I’d be the filling in that sandwich anytime!Cameron Matthews… I’d have zero inhibitions faced with him!Kid Karisma… all mine.Marcus Ruhl… more than enough to share with this massive hunk of muscle.Logan Vaughn… I’d need some private time with those gargantuan thighs.Chris Xaos… me, my partner, and ever Britboy wrestling hunk we can find can pile on!
My interest in professional football has primarily centered on a three-way ring wrestling fantasy in which Aaron Rodgers, Jordy Nelson, and Clay Matthews beat the living shit out of each other (obviously including extensive double-teaming by Aaron and Jordy), until they’ve all been stripped out of their trunks and the winner gets a blow job from one loser while he racks the other across his gargantuan shoulders (yep, you can pretty much guess who’s who). Actually following a season has been outside of my frame of reference for well over a decade, and actually paying attention to draft day has frankly never been on my radar. But it was hard not to notice Michael Sam getting drafted by the Rams and sucking face with his boyfriend in celebration. The kiss seemed a tad forced and uncomfortably choreographed to me. Nevertheless, it was hot. For me. Others were clearly offended. There were apparently the predictable junior high level “ewwwwws” from the un-self-reflected narcissists privileged to remain far too long in angst-ridden adolescent ignorance and knee jerk self-defensiveness around their own secret same-sex fantasies. There was the wildly hypocritical “shield my baby’s eyes” indignation from the same mothers who blissfully see no irony in wanting more guns in their children’s schools while earnestly believing that witnessing g-rated affection between consenting adults will scar their offspring permanently. And there’s the “homosexual agendaists” who whip themselves in sackcloth because of the “politicization” of sport, and sports television, and masculinity itself. Whatever it means for football or football fans or sports television, the kerfuffle highlights the simple truth that persists regardless of where you stand: the personal is political. Oh, and two men kissing is sexy.
There was a stiff competition for homoerotic wrestler of the month this time around. Whenever BG East drops a new catalog, the field is thick, and add to that a couple of choice releases from Rock Hard Wrestling, a couple eye catching matches in Naked Kombat, and some hot new commodities at Muscle Domination Wrestling, and there was a lot of stiffness to go round, believe me. One hot hunk in particular had me wrapped around his little finger, however, just about as completely as he had his opponent essentially begging for the wrestling foreplay to come to an end and full throttle fucking to commence. Bringing a hot, hard, gorgeous hunk to the point of pleading to be allowed to concede so he can give in to his consuming lusts is a most excellent plot point, and one entirely convincingly-delivered by my new reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month…
Now, I’ve had my eye on Skrapper a long time. His silky baritone rumbling out the phrase, “dude” is like Pavlov’s bell to me these days. He just has to say, “dude” and I’m salivating and hard as a rock. Clearly, I’m not the only one who’s been conditioned to expect intensely hot things from Skrapper, because it takes zero time at all before Trey Dixon is telegraphing his raging lust when the two show up in the mat room in Passion and Punishment. Typically, homoerotic wrestling starts with the tension of wrestling, but not this time. This time, the boys both clearly and obviously want to fuck from the start. There’s no pretense, no bluster. They’re sucking face and grinding crotches in an instant. And I’m buying ever second of it.
Skrapper is always insanely intense!
Now, I assume his parents did not literally name him “Skrapper” on his birth certificate, but they should have. Time and time again, the gutsy, fierce, hungry, stance of Skrapper has demonstrated little finesse and an overabundance of raw emotion. The boy just wants to dominate so… fucking… much! You can’t swing a cat without hitting a homoerotic wrestler who is trying to look like he’s bringing the heat. Skrapper just is. I buy it wholesale every time. No pretense. No posing. He just wants to grind an opponent into submission with anything and everything it may take, which frequently includes Skrapper’s balls in his face. It’s not always the case, but frequently Skrapper let’s us glimpse his erotic freak flag, perhaps never as openly as when the sadistic-erotic master himself got hold of him, Kid Vicious. But as much as I adore that match with KV, I tell you Passion and Punishment is even more sexual and sexier.
Trey wants this so much Skrapper can taste it!
It’s not uncommon for me to get critiques of my favorite-picks who pull the “two-to-tango” card. Let me just intercept that one by acknowledging Trey Dixon more than carries his weight in this match on all fronts. Where the hell did they find this stud!? This is just his SECOND match, and both of them have burned holes in my retinas for being over the top scorching hot! I don’t know if Trey has done porn (though I fully expect someone to tell me now), but he should, because raw, sexy sensuality drips off of him like honey. This guy is no rookie, regardless of how many matches I’ve seen him in on camera, and he quite nearly out-scraps Skrapper
If Skrapper wasn’t so damn sexy, this match might have been all sown up ages ago.
Trey’s Achilles heel, so to speak, is Skrapper’s sexiness. Whenever Trey gets a head of steam in the match, when Skrapper is vulnerable, wrapped up, tied down, Trey cannot resist tasting the goods. They want each other. They need each other. Fuck, they DESERVE each other, working their fine asses overtime in this non-stop throw down that leaves the mat drenched in sweat.
Two hot, horny, pumped and primed bodies!
However, I give this to Skrapper not because he, in the end, ends up on top, but because he beats Trey not just into submission, but into nearly weeping for release. They’re both exhausted, totally wasted, their bodies bruised, slapping against one another wetly, glistening in the light. And that slow burning lust that’s been on the simmer the entire time finally makes Trey melt as Skrapper bears down on him, domineering over top of him, that phenomenal tenacity being the barest finger on the scales that tip finally in Skrapper’s direction. Then there’s this smirk on Skrapper’s face, an exhausted, but certain acknowledgment that he’d broken his opponent in body and spirit not just by physical domination, but by raw, sexual appeal.
Who’s got whom?
Honestly, I won’t be surprised if I hear someone argue that they watched the match and thought Trey “won.” It’s just that close of a physical battle, and the climax teeters on the edge of just saying “fuck it” to the question of who out-wrestled whom as the boys settle in to seriously go to town on one another. With 30 seconds left in the taping, honestly, a strong case could be made either way. But then there are those last 30 seconds…
Skrapper’s walking out of here with Trey’s fine ass and the title of homoerotic wrestler of the month firmly in hand.
Skrapper breaks the intimate embrace and snags Trey in a side headlock, dragging the stunned, beautiful, incredibly hot stud out of the mat room and, presumably, onto just about any flat surface out of camera shot to ride that bright red, round ass of his like a rodeo star. The chemistry between these two is electric. Their mutual ferocity is epic. The raw blend of lust and wrestling is intuitive and as far as I’m concerned, 100% genuine. But for pure entertainment, the hunk here that grabs me by the balls and makes me gasp over and over again first and foremost is Skrapper. The title of homoerotic wrestler of the month, just like Trey Dixon’s phenomenal ass, belongs unquestionably to him.
Mason Brooks and Drake Marcos are no strangers around neverland. They’ve both beengracious interviewees, and both hunks have stayed in touch over the last year and a half as they’ve broken into the homoerotic wrestling business. So what a delight it was for me to have both of them agree to sit down with me and give a tandem interview to reflect on how far they’ve come, and in particular break down some of the sexy details of their newly released battle with each other in BG East’s Passion and Punishment.I shared my very enthusiastic thoughts about that match last week, so what a treat to delve deeper into that incredibly sexy battle with the two studs in question. The conversation took some twists and turns that I did not expect, and there’s some reckoning still to happen now that some words were spoken on the record, that a particular wrestler can’t take back now. So buckle up for this wild ride with two sizzling sexy sophomores and one very turned-on blogger.
Mason Brooks and his magical nipples.The Cheshire Cat of Homoerotic Wrestling, Drake Marcos, is getting serious.
Bard: Drake and Mason, thanks for chatting with me. This is my first time interviewing two handsome studs at the same time. Thanks for being my first 3-way!
Mason: Happy to oblige. I hope Drake isn’t too intimidated being in the same interview with me.
Bard: After the bruising you took in your recent match, Drake, I could imagine why you might feel intimidated. Any post-traumatic flashbacks sitting down for this chat with Mason here?
Drake: Always…always a pleasure, Bard. When it comes to Mason, however, I don’t believe that what I feel in regards to him is “intimidation”, per se. I would say that it’s more akin to “awareness.” No false, swaggering bravado on my part…a “no spin zone” if you will. I’m well aware that I got my ass whupped all over that mat room, very well aware. So what I feel is more of an “awareness” of what he’s capable of now, so our inevitable rematch will involve a little more calculation than what I normally bring to a match up. I’m surprised my shoulders are still functioning after that shit.
Mason sets the tone by “autographing” Drake’s promotional pic.
Bard: I have to admit, I was a little worried about lasting damage to your body as well. Glad to hear you’re still in working order and plotting the rematch. Mason, you quite clearly had a plan in mind when you arrived on the mats that day. What was going through your head when you posted Drake’s photo on the wall and wrote “property of Mason Brooks” across it?
Mason: So I have a little confession. I try to let my wrestling do the talking, so to speak. But when I found out my next match was against precious little Drake, I just couldn’t resist playing a few head games. He really is fun to mess with, even when you don’t have him locked up in a bodyscissor, and watching the frustration bloom across his face is half the fun. Besides, I needed to set everyone straight, and make them realize I’m no jobber (those last two boys got lucky, I got distracted by their Canadian-ness). So I thought, what better way to make my mark as a real threat than to, literally, mark him as my property? Oh sure, I started with the picture, ’cause I knew that would get him going, but from the start I had visions of him lying there helpless with my name written in big letters across his chest. I planned that match in my mind a hundred times, and then I made it happen. I’m just glad they filmed it so I can watch my handiwork, and take satisfaction in a job well done. After they see this match, no one will mistake me for a jobber. And that is what we Washingtonians call controlling the narrative.
Bard: Controlling is definitely the first word that comes to my mind as I watch that session. It also seemed that sending a message was on both of your minds. How much do both of you have your fans in mind when you step onto the mat?
Things got rough and intense quickly in Passion & Punishment
Drake: If there’s one thing Drake values more than his meds, it’s his fans. It’s why I started the blog (it’s not been abandoned, promise), it’s why my undercover photo sprees are now infamous (my lips are sealed on the culprit of the last one, however). Not only was Mason’s liberty with my photo and my sharpie an affront to me, it was an affront to my fans. I mean who the hell wants Mason’s “autograph” on my picture?! And I swore to myself I would make him pay. I had the best of intentions, I swear. Nobody can say I didn’t fight my heart out.
Mason: I also had Drake’s fans in mind.
Drake: Bitch…
Mason stays focused on the task at hand: battering Drake’s abs.
Mason: Seriously, though, when you’re in the middle of an intense match like that, part of you knows the fans are watching and you want to make something that’s enjoyable to watch, but mostly that takes a back seat to more immediate concerns, like the guy whose abs you’re beating on at the moment. There’s no time to think about much else. Hopefully that intensity comes through and makes the match fun for everyone to watch.
Drake: I find myself echoing some of the same sentiments.
Bard: You’re both incredibly intense wrestlers who are always a blast to watch! I couldn’t help but notice you both mention during your match adoring comments that have been made about you. Of course, I’m thinking of the references to Drake as the Cheshire Cat of homoerotic wrestling and the description of Mason’s nipples as “magical.” I like to take credit for both of those talking points when it comes to your PR (though I suspect I’m not the first to refer to your nipples as magical, Mason). Do comments from fans and bloggers ever help psych you up as you prepare for a match? In other words, do you ever read your own PR, and does that ever figure into what you’re bringing into the mat room with you?
Drake: I would be lying if I said that I didn’t have the Drake Marcos’ reference section of Neverland bookmarked on my desktop. I hope you don’t mind that I claimed the Bard-coined Cheshire Cat moniker as my own. Also I have never deleted an email from a fan yet. I use this as kind of a launching point: things that fans want from my matches and always try to do fans a service that way. But in terms of psyching myself up for a match? I’m like a tightly wound spring, in that regard. Always have a bit of gear and a can of red bull in my bag, ready to go.
Bard: Mind!? Are you crazy! Turned on, more like. I just have to figure out what sort of royalty payments you owe me. Mason, do you follow your own PR, and if so, can I get kickbacks every time you use the phrase “magical” to describe your nipples?
Drake: I think we all know Mason enjoys having his considerable ego stroked…among other things.
Mason: Feel free to draw something up, Bard, and I’ll have my legal team look it over.
Bard: I’ll fax something over in the morning. There will be lots of stroking involved. So this was, I believe, the first time we’ve seen you wrestle naked, Mason. How was the experience of wrestling naked on camera for you ?
Mason and Drake let it all hang out well before the end of their brutal match.
Mason: I didn’t think too much about it, actually. It just sort of happened in the moment. And then that horse was out of the barn, as they say, so I went with it. Being buck naked is very liberating, I must say. Although one must be careful not to, (ahem), squash anything. Other than Drake, of course. I was happy to squash him.
Drake: Yeah, yeah…
Bard: Well I hope we get to see that horse liberated often! Now, Drake, this wasn’t the first time we’ve seen your trunks ripped off and your naked fineness dragged across the mat. While it’s our pleasure to see your body getting fitter with every match, it doesn’t look like you’re exactly enjoying being on the short end of another brutal, humiliating beating. In a conversation I recently had with another wrestler who will remain anonymous you were referred to as a “sweet jobber.” How do you feel about the moniker “jobber,” and what keeps your head in the game after a series of such crushing defeats?
Don’t call Drake a jobber (?).
Drake: Thank you for noting my progress; the attention and compliments are very appreciated. I think I have an idea as to just who that wrestler was that referred to me in such a manner; his wording narrows the list of suspects considerably. Maybe when you finally accept my challenge/invitation I can allay my suspicions by beating the culprit’s name out of you. Despite my less-than-stellar track record at BG, I kind of balk at the title “jobber” (because that’s what it is…a “title”, NOT a “moniker”…it’s not my name or identity. Trust). No one likes getting their ass kicked. I was seriously untested and inexperienced when I stepped onto the mats for my baptism/trial by fire with Gabriel Ross and since then, from each and every significant thumping that I endure, I learn and take a lot that will help inform my future matches. Someone once said you have to lose your life to find it; you have to die to be reborn. I do believe that my soul crushing trouncing in the ring by Jonny along with my equally disheartening loss on the mats to you-know-who has been a… Y’know what? Just prepare yourself for the coming Rebirth. I can just feel it. How do I keep my head in the game? The fact that I know that all the “jobber” comments and dismissiveness that people regard me with are just the growing pains I have to go through before I reach my full potential. This whipping boy is taking up the lash.
Drake learning some lessons.
Bard: Sounds like we should be watching for the Second Coming of Drake. I certainly mean no offense when I ask about the term jobber. From the fan side of things, some of the hottest commodities are the sweetly selling jobbers, and as Mason mentioned during your match, you are nothing short of beautiful when your face is twisted up in agony. That said, I think I remember suggesting that if you won something in the year-end BGE awards, then I might have to take your call out seriously. So congratulations on your match with Jonny winning Best Squash, and bring it on, stud! Though, if you don’t enjoy getting your ass kicked, I’ll understand if you don’t want to risk it. What were some of the lessons you learned with Mason’s ass sitting on your face?
[extensive, awkward silence]
Mason: This isn’t the first time someone’s been dumbstruck by my ass.
Dumbstruck!
Bard: I believe that. A lot.
Drake: Sorry, was answering some fan mail. I love compliments, I really do and there is a certain group that like to see me fading out in a sleeper. Hey, I’m not going to knock people’s tastes. Fans just need to not get so…comfortable. Even though I got completely bulldozed by Jonny, I can’t hate on it. I lobbied hard for that award. There would have been…repercussions if I didn’t get something for that match besides bruising that lasted for a little over a week. Despite my humbling ordeal against Mason, I did learn a lot, but, Bard, what does it matter what kind of bullets are in the gun as long as the gun is loaded? It’s my ammo! To answer that question would be akin to emptying the clip. Uh-uh…no way. However, step on the mats with me, Bard. You can learn first hand just what I’ve learned.
Drake is no stranger to biting off more than he can chew. Just ask Jonny Firestorm.
Bard: Personally I’d like to see you trussed up on a turnbuckle in the ring again, but mat, ring, whatever. We’ll see what we can do, stud. Now try to pay attention as Mason discusses where he’s still learning to up his game, because you could use a little practice scouting your competition, if you want that rematch. So, Mason, other than facing Canadians, what are your… I don’t want to say weaknesses… growing edges?
Mason: Ha, “growing edges,” I like that. I try to learn something from every match, win or lose, (not that losing is much of a concern these days). As much as a wrestling match is about physical strength and skill, I’ve learned just how important it is to go in with the right attitude, and pay attention to the mental dynamics at play. There have definitely been a few matches–including my firstfew for BG East–where I went in with a certain trepidation, just because I was the new guy, or because the other guy is bigger, or talks a big game. The truth is, though, every guy–every guy–has a part of him that feels weak and can be intimidated. The trick is to find that and exploit it. Some guys are just more easily exploited than others [*cough* *cough*]. So I feel like I’m getting better at that mental aspect of the competition, and I look forward to taking on the challenges that BG East has in store for me with a renewed sense of confidence.
Bard: That makes total sense, and I can clearly seeing you doing exactly that in all of your matches thus far. I also love how no one had been able to resist locking lips with you. I hope that theme continues in your march to greatness. Since you’re feeling the wind at your back, would you be willing to give Drake some pointers as he toils away at that first on-camera victory? What does he need to do to pull all of his experience on the short end of the stick together into a winning plan?
Drake: He wins one match so he’s a pro offering lessons now? What a crock!
Mason makes sure that Drake will remember this for a long time!
Mason: Ya know, green isn’t a good color on you, boy. Anyway, Bard, I think the best advice I could give is to clear your mind, forget about all your previous matches, all your previous opponents, and come at the next one like it’s your first, a real clean slate. Now, in the case of me, that might be difficult, since I’m pretty much unforgettable, but I wish him the best of luck with that. I’d like nothing better than to see Drake turn things around and notch one in the winner’s column.
Bard: Now, that’s just sweet and sportsmanlike! Since you do have more matches on your resume, Drake, do you have any gems of wisdom to share with Mr. Magical Nipples?
Mason: Oh boy, here we go…
Drake’s advice: stay away from Jonny Firestorm!
Drake: Thank you, Mason, for your words of “wisdom.” I think there’s some solid advice in there. I will say this, you may have Bard and the others fooled with this “good guy” act, but I’m unconvinced. But here’s my advice: watch your back. And stay away from Jonny. Nothing will crush this little victory lap that you’re on faster than 5 minutes in the ring with him.
Bard: What do the two of you think about other wrestlers at BGE? In addition to Jonny, who do think are the toughest competitors currently in the mix? Which headliners are the most overhyped?
Lane Hartley: the real deal?
Drake: I think Jonny should tread lightly when it comes to Lane Hartley. The man is gorgeous and so, so deadly. Overhyped? Mason Brooks….but you said “headliners.” In all seriousness though, every guy on the roster is there for a reason, they all have something to bring to the table, and have reached their level of popularity for a reason, and I can only hope that my star continues to shine and maybe one day as bright as theirs.
Bard: Okay, Mason, Drake has just pulled all his punches. Tell us, straight from the hip, who do you think is the real deal at BGE and who’s treading on thin ice?
Skrapper and Trey Dixon – Mason wants a piece of this action!
Mason: Let’s see. I’ve seen enough of Jonny to know that he knows his stuff. Same with Ethan Axel. They both have the skills, and it shows. As for those two on the cover of our latest DVD, Skrapper and Trey, I’m not convinced. Both of them are a little too pretty to seem like much of a threat on the mats, but there’s only one way to find out for sure. I guess I’ll just have to take them both on.
Bard: I just swooned. My mind is going to spin for days trying to decide in a Mason-Skrapper-Trey sandwich, who is the filling. What do you say to prospective wrestlers thinking about trying out for BG East? Now that you’re sophomores, what can you tell aspiring homoerotic wrestlers to prepare them for what they’ll find should they make it to the dance?
Drake: First off, make sure this is really what you want to do, because once it’s out there, it’s out there. Secondly, put your training into overdrive, working for BG is not easy, it’s actually work. Now with that disclaimer, I would say that they can expect to find a feeling of homecoming: being around others with a like mind, shared vision, similar passions, camaraderie, lasting friendships, sexy wrestling (of course). However, be prepared to have your strength and endurance tested. Train like never before.
Bard: Sounds like a good gig. As I’m sitting here with you two, there are two words that keep popping up for me: tag team. A Marcos/Brooks team sounds like an awesomely sexy and dangerous pairing. Either of you thought about tag teaming?
Drake: I’m sure I can put my considerable ego aside and work with Mason, if he feels the same , especially since I know what he’s capable of now. I mean, we kind of dominated those games of pool chicken that those leaked pictures showed.
Bard: Exactly my thinking. What do you think about the idea, Mason?
They can dominate at a game of chicken in the pool. Could they team up in the ring?
Mason: Yeah, we did make a good team in the pool, and I feel like Drake was a natural in the girl’s role. It must be easier when you have a guy with a strong (and sexy) pair of legs supporting you. I would definitely be up for a tag team match, since it’s something I haven’t done yet. Especially if they paired us up against the right team. Maybe another recent winner/loser pair? We just have to be careful–watching Drake can be mesmerizing, so I might get distracted and forget to come to his rescue. Or turn on him… Nah, I’m not that kind of guy. I can be a little, uhh, what’s the word…arrogant, perhaps? But I’m also loyal to a fault. If Drake was my teammate, I’d whip both the other guys, just for bragging rights. I do so enjoy bragging.
Drake: [sighs angrily]
Bard: I’m not sure that’s a formula for victory, but I want a front row seat for that match, because that would be some sweet, sexy drama! And I couldn’t agree with you more that Drake is awfully mesmerizing to watch wrestle. Between your nipples and Drake’s pretty face, I think you two could make quite the mesmerizing duo. I knew that doing this tandem interview would turn out to be a wild ride. Anything else either of you would like to say to each other… or me… or either army of your respective fans?
Mason: I just got a chance to watch the match yesterday, and I think it’s something pretty special, so I hope everybody enjoys it as much as Drake enjoyed getting worked over by me. I’ve probably said it before, but the fans are what keep us pushing harder to look our best, fight our hardest, and make the best match videos we can. I’ve been humbled (well, almost humbled) by the amount of support and encouragement I’ve received since my debut, and it makes me eager to keep reaching for bigger and better things. Who knows what this year will hold? Maybe I’ll turn my attention to the ring. And Drake my boy, if you ever feel like getting some practice in, you know where to find me. I promise to go a little easier on you, and to leave the Sharpie at home.
Bard: Well said, of course, Mason. You have as remarkable a facility with words as you do with wrestling. And since you mention it, I have to say that despite Drake’s comment about not enjoying getting his ass kicked, I could swear he’s enjoying it at least a little when you have him racked over your back near the end of your match. His lips may say “no, no” but that swelling cock seems to sing another tune. What say you, Drake?
Drake: Listen, at the end of the day, wrestling turns me on. Whether I’m getting my ass kicked or kicking ass (it’s gonna fuckin’ happen!!!) it’s incredibly arousing to have two sweaty bodies rubbing up against each other, muscles straining, hearts racing, breaths ragged. It’s what drew me to it before and what keeps me coming back now. I’ll admit it, Mason’s hot, and the view of me across his shoulders only increases the sexiness tenfold. I mean, I am mesmerizing (as you both have stated). About fans: they are everything, seriously. I probably would have withered up by this point if I didn’t get besieged with messages when I log on to global, or when I receive an email from someone who stumbled across my blog, wanting to know when I’m getting back to it (hint: soon), or telling me they see themselves on the page. I too find myself humbled and grateful to talk to people everyday that enjoy my work as well as wrestling in general, and then getting to know them as people. The digital age has made this great big world so much smaller – the little closet gay boy out in the boonies who enjoys wrestling with his friends because of his physiological response to it and has to live vicariously through the stuff he finds on the net. I was that kid, and now I get to live out my dream. Live what you love. Granted, the world of homoerotic wrestling is a small one. We’re a niche little world and an unglamorous one but, shit, I get to live a dream!! I’ve developed some amazing friendships through this whole journey, and am eager to see what happens next and hopefully am able to give my fans (and wrestling fans in general) what they want, and have come to expect, from BG. The ride has just begun.
Bard: Obviously, Drake, you also have an awesome ability to communicate the heart and passion of what turns so many of us on about homoerotic wrestling. I’m so inspired by your eloquence that it makes me feel a little ambivalent about needing to join the swelling ranks of guys who’ve worn you out. Mason, what do you think? Should I let young Drake off the hook for all his trash talk tossed my way, or does he need yet one more serving of humble pie?
Drake: Um, you’re fine… Looking for a way out, Bard?
Mason’s flag is planted.
Bard: [laughing] No! Just thought I should check with Mason since he appears to now own you, lock, stock, and fully aroused barrel. Don’t want to plant my flag on already claimed territory.
Drake: He only thinks he owns me! And the only planting that…you want to take this outside?
Bard: If need be, sure, but settle down there buckaroo. Mason earned the right to express his opinion on the subject right around the time he had you weeping for mercy draped across his shoulders. I’d like to hear what he has to say, seeing how he has the most recent read on just how much brutality and humiliation you can survive.
Mason: As much as I would love to think that I was the one who finally gave Drake his fill of punishment, I’m sure he’s already secretly eager for more.
Bard: Oh, no Drake. I am so sorry. I think that was the sound of your last chance leaving the building.
Drake: What are you apologizing for? I’ve been itching to show you just what I can do, Bard. That was your last chance!
Bard: Well, we can sort out the details of Drake’s next drubbing between the two of us. You two have made my first 3-way a true delight, and given me a lot to contemplate. I cannot wait to see where your wrestling careers take you next, and I hope that includes a 3-way rumble between Mason, Skrapper, and Trey, and a much needed recuperative vacation for Drake once I’m done with him. I hope you’ll stay in touch, Mason, and I hope you don’t hold it against me after I spank your ass, Drake!
Drake: Bring it, Bard…your writing won’t save you on the mats. Let’s do this!
Mason: Let me know if you guys need a ref.
Bard: If you wear speedos and a smirk, you’re hired. And my mind blowing wrestling fantasy will be complete!
Little buckaroo still hoping he can find someone he can beat.
So far, I’ve heard no word of any BG East boys turning up in an emergency room after being found out as our man inside, the source of these smuggled pics from a recent BG East taping. Whoever you are, I’m wishing you good health and long life, and dinner is my treat if you survive long enough for us to ever meet! For the rest of you, here are the final shots that our man inside has shared from the Florida sunshine.
Drake and Mason look like alligators hungrily eyeing their prey, aka yet-to-be released rookie Ty. Was this poolside scene all about between-match fun, or was there some sort of Wet ‘n’ Wild free for all caught on motion camera? It seems we’ll have to wait and see.
I’m thrilled to see that Skrapper was also on site, looking hunkier than ever and in need of a certain blogger to liberally lather him up with suntan lotion. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: pound for pound, I think Skrapper may be the most potent and fiercest homoerotic wrestler ever caught on camera. And a Miami Vice five o’clock shadow makes him look even sexier!
It doesn’t surprise me at all to see that Skrapper draws a crowd, and rookie-on-fire Trey Dixon looks like an ideal candidate to meet the buzz saw that is Skrapper on the mats.
I don’t know what it says about our mystery man inside that the most frequently photographed hunk in this batch of contraband photos is the thinking man’s homoerotic wrestler, Mason Brooks. Strike that. I do know that it says that our man inside has exquisite taste in rookie hunks. However, I still don’t know what it says about the identity of the man behind the camera.
Mason’s pecs are looking meatier and meatier, and I assume I don’t need to point out yet again just how sexy his nipples are. You don’t have an option to vote for “Best Nipples” in the BG East Year End Awards poll, so I’m unilaterally declaring Mason the winner. Deal with it.
I believe our secret photog also has a thing for luscious preview-hottie, Ty, because his hot, bronzed body shows up a whole lot as well. My guess is that the upperclassmen were lined up for their shot at this beautiful babyface. I hope that he’s tougher than he looks, because with the other cast of characters on hand, there’s a whole heap of hurtin’ in store for this beauty.
The shadows and low-def resolution on this final pic leave me guessing, but I’m pretty sure that this is Drake Marcosand Skrapper in what appears to be a tongue wrestling match. Or they may have just recreated the spaghetti scene from Lady and the Tramp (any ideas which is the Tramp?). Or they both have new tongue piercings that just got entangled. I’m just not certain.
These smuggled behind-the-scenes pics of BG East boys probably raise more questions than they answer, but it’s a thrill to see a hint of what’s yet to be revealed from BG East. To our man inside, our sincere thanks, and I’m serious about dinner being on me… if you dare reveal your identity!
I’m not going to apologize for a moment for taking an extra day or two to savor and study the new releases I’ve got in my hands now from BG East’s catalog100, before I make my pick for homoerotic wrestler of the month. There are just too many instantly credible candidates to rush this decision. So I’ll make that call tomorrow. Maybe the next day. Depends on whether I need an IV drip to replenish fluids as I go.
But I will marvel briefly once again at the momentousness of BGE100. Celebrating 100 catalogs of the highest quality homoerotic wrestling, BG East has given more than a passing nod to both their past and future with their choice of wrestlers and matches to be featured for the anniversary edition. Marrying the best of homoeroticism and the best of professional wrestling takes a lot of heart, a lot of art, and maybe even a little good luck to be as successful as BG East has been. So here’s my nod to whatever it is that adds up to their formula for a long and healthy relationship with their avid fans, in this case: something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.
Old School BG East Matmen: Robin Carter and Big D!
Something“old”: I’m calling out another epic revival to accompany the earthshaking return ofboth Brad Rochelle and Kid Leopard to the BG East ring. Almost/even more anticipated is BG East’s grab bag of mat matches “from the vaults,” highlighting out most notably for me a Matmen24 match featuring classic matman RobinCarter and the living legend himself, “Big D” Ward. Big D was awarded a lifetime achievement award at the end of Wrestlefest 2 which was, what, 10 years ago at least!? Big D’s dominance on the mat was always AMAZING to watch, and his sudden and long absence from new releases was marked by many with grief and mourning. Bringing this “old” gem out from the vaults and dusting it off for catalog 100 is fulfilling the wishes of hundreds of Big D fans clamoring for more of the legendary master of the mats for years!
Trey Dixon is just one of the rookies debuting in catalog 100
Something “new”: I think one of the things that BG East does simply better than just about anyone is constantly recruiting top quality new talent, and they did not spare new faces in putting together catalog 100. I’ve already noted the jaw dropping looks of new fantasymen Kip Sorrell and Lane Hartleyfrom Fantasymen 35. Also eye-catching (to say the least) is g-g-gorgeous newcomer Trey Dixon getting every impressive inch of his mouthwatering body squeezed through the ringer of Jake Ryder’s erotically sadistic will in X-Fights 36.
Lorenzo “Jake” Lowe borrows muscle hunk Flavio’s trunks to towel off, but don’t worry, he gives the sweat-soaked undagear back.
Something “borrowed”: So Lorenzo “Jake” Lowe’s opponent in Undagear 20, Flavio” could be something new and something blue as well, but I’ve settled on celebrating the “something borrowed” in this match. LJL has his hands full of the bulging muscles all over incredibly built Flavio, but happily both of these boys get stripped to barely mentionable thongs. Owning a massively constructed hunk of beauty like Flavio is no small feet for “little” LJL, so it’s no wonder the hot BG East executive has sweat pouring off his body in streams before long. Fortunately, Flavio’s baby blue and incredibly sexy trunks serve as suitable towel to soak up LJL’s perspiration. Like the gentleman he is, though, LJL returns the garment… in the rookie’s face… where it lands with a splat.
Marco Carlow’s blue trunks, like his groin, are nearly ripped apart by Jake Jenkins!
Something “blue”: It looks like Joe at Ringside at Skull Island is as captivated by the main event on Undagear 20 as I am: muscled babyface beauties “the original” Jake Jenkins and Marco Carlow. There’s so much right about this match, including but not limited to the change of wardrobe about halfway through. Before that, though, I could stare for days at the most amazing battle of all in this contest: the seams of Marco’s blue trunks nearly ripped apart time and time again as JJ ties the muscleboy up like a Stretch Armstrong doll. There’s so much goodness packed inside that blue fabric, and JJ displays it from every angle physically possible. And I’m the master of spoilers, so stop reading now if you don’t want to know too much…. because Marco’s blue trunks nearly could have counted toward “something borrowed,” except for the fact that JJ does not give them back!
So I need to get back to sucking down gatorade and staring at more of catalog 100 until my eyes burn. Catch you on the other side of ecstasy.
Sidelineland 