Category: Kid Karisma

Hotter Than I Can Imagine

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Yesterday something momentous happened. This is something that just doesn’t happen often. It played out like this… I posted yesterday on Kid Karisma’s report back to me that Austin Cooper was not the sore loser whose ego just couldn’t tolerate getting owned by Kid K. Apparently, there’s still some as yet unreleased match between Kid K and an opponent who walks away seriously pissed. Most of the time, Kid K assures us, once he’s dominated a lucky hunk in the ring, there are no hard feelings. Typically, roughed up egos are soothed with Kid’s classic concoction of karisma and commitment to bacchanalian delights. They all go out partying together once club gear replaces boots, kneepads and trunks. As is the norm, Kid Karisma revealed yesterday, Austin was out partying with Kid K soon enough after their recently released ring match for Austin’s Wrestler Spotlight DVD.
Kid Karisma can read my mind
As is my way, this sent my imagination into overdrive, picturing these two ripped, gorgeous, hot as hell young hunks tearing up the dance floor side-by-side.  With hatchets buried, Kid Karisma and Austin Cooper hitting the clubs and shaking their respective world class asses together was instantly an image that possessed my imagination with an iron grip.  Then, as if reading my mind, I received this pic from Kid K:
Kid and Coop on the dance floor before the party begins

Turns out, Kid K and Austin beat my imagination to the punch. This is apparently a shot of the two of them early on in an evening out clubbing, studying themselves in a wall of mirrors. It doesn’t look like there are many fellow-partyers yet there, but ohmygod what lucky, lucky (luckyluckylucky) bastards were those who walked onto the dance floor that night to see the sculpted physiques of Kid Karisma and Austin Cooper doing my 3rd most favorite thing to do with hard, hot bodies like theirs!

In my imagination yesterday, I had suggested that the only thing that could make that scene any hotter was to throw Jake Jenkins into the mix to form a perfect storm of blond, red-headed, and brunette hunkiness that would surely bring fellow partiers to their knees.  A short time later, I received this little treasure guaranteed to drive me insane:

Now the party can really begin!!!

I do believe in a god, because the karismatic one answered a prayer that I hadn’t even dared to voice out loud. I suppose that may make this threesome the holy trinity, but I’m going to stop the religious analogies there before I get complaints from the devout fringe who may read this blog. I may be too old and not nearly pretty enough to get in the door of any club that might be the setting to see this truly awe-inspiring scene of gorgeous bodies, but having one prayer answered already, my next prayer is to see something like this in person before I die. The smiles on their glassy-eyed faces are making me melt as I see superimposed overtop of them the picture of Austin pounding the shit out of Jake in their jockstrap BGE debut Ripped Rookies… and Kid Karisma tying Jake’s spine like a bow around the ring post in their No Mercy Hunkbash… and what I can only imagine will be a feast for the eyes to watch Kid K and Austin’s new release for Austin’s Wrestler Spotlight (which I’ll be enjoying soon!).

Crowning a New Champion: Kid Karisma

The answer to prayers (or the reading of my mind) by Kid Karisma and his camera isn’t actually the momentous event that I mentioned to start this post. Following up on a fantastically hot, candid, provocative interview to start 2012, the stunning beauty of Kid K and Austin’s match in still frame, and these behind the scenes shots of three of the most gorgeous young homoerotic wrestlers in action today, something even more momentous happened: Kid Karisma knocked Lon Dumont out of the spot of my favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy)! Lon has absolutely owned that title for ages, and I’m still awfully devoted to him as he remains top contender to retake the title, but without a Lon release in Catalog 91 and with Kid K fulfilling my fantasies before I even have them, there’s just no doubt about it. There’s a fiery, no shit, hardbodied, blue-eyed, freckle-faced, red-headed rugby player turned homoerotic wrestler in undisputed ownership of the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy division): Kid Karisma.

Begging the Question

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I’ve fielded several emails in the past three days about BG East’s brand new releases in Catalog 91. Damnation! So far, everyone seems to agree that this is an astonishingly hot batch of mouthwatering wrestling potential! To be blunt, there are typically at least a couple products in any given BG East catalog that leave me lukewarm. It’s not an indictment of BGE, but just a nod to the fact that BGE caters to a relatively broad swath of tastes and kinks. However, this catalog is not at all typical. In trying to decide what I can live without, I’m hard pressed to vote any of these DVDs off the island. And it’s not just that there’s maybe one match on a DVD that seems like it’s a must-see while the others are negligible. It’s pretty much every single match!  All but one DVD has at least one former or current homoerotic wrestler of the month or overall favorite wrestler title holder. Pros in Private 9 is the only product without a former or current favorite, however the shots of a Charlie Panther are blowing my mind (did that drill sergeant personal trainer Gino Liotta get a hold of Charlie’s workout routine!?). And the image of Mac Matthias’ butt keeps intruding into my thoughts over the course of my days (in a really, really great way).  So DVD after DVD, this catalog is one long, gorgeous, titillating parade of hot, hunky, hung homoerotic wrestlers!

Kid Karisma continues to perfect the art of using the ropes
to punish his opponents.

Joe has waxed nothing short of eloquent and, dare I say, almost giddy about Austin Cooper’s Wrestler Spotlight DVD and, in particular, the ring bout between Austin and Kid Karisma. I tend to think of Joe as more measured in his praise than I often am. I tend to fall into passionate love (okay, lust) with matches relatively easily, whereas I credit Joe with a more intentional approach to doling out praise in precise proportion to a match’s merits. So reading his unrestrained infatuation with Austin and Kid K’s confrontation makes me think: hot damn, I’ve got to see that!

Two epic asses should make for one extremely hot match!

Joe and I are clearly not the only ones drawn to the whole BG East catalog this go round, nor are we alone in zeroing in on the match between Austin and Kid Karisma. Three separate readers have mentioned to me that they already have orders placed for Austin’s Wrestler Spotlight with his Kid K match at front and center of their attention and anticipation. And 2 of those readers have asked me whether it’s possible that Austin could be the bitter loser who defied Kid Karisma’s charm and walked away seriously put out and resentful of getting owned by the karismatic one.

A heaping dose of the full Kid K treatment

In my interview with him last month, Kid Karisma described one particular, as yet unreleased match where his opponent walked away nursing a persistent grudge against BG East’s irrepressible partyboy.  “Well, there is one guy,” Kid K explained, “but the match hasn’t been released. It was easily the most intense match I have ever done. He hated my guts, and he hated the fact that I was much stronger and boisterous.” Rather than shaking hands and jumping onto the Kid K party train once all the dust was settled (as apparently happens with most of the lucky, lucky boys who face Kid K), a certain unnamed wrestler just walked away pissed. So the same thought occurred to me even before 2 readers separately asked me the question: is Austin Cooper said sore loser?

Austin is humiliatingly ass-upward as Kid K leans back and takes a breather

I know nothing more about it than you do, if you read the interview, so I decided to go straight to the source. Putting the question to Kid Karisma directly, I asked him this morning if Austin Cooper was the bitter nelly whose pride couldn’t cope with getting the full Kid K treatment.  He replied unambiguously, “No Austin is def not it! He’s pretty amazing, and I had a great time with him in the ring as well as out partying!!!”

Austin makes his presence felt from behind Kid Karisma
Happily, I’m just letting the image of these two asstastic body-beautifuls hitting the dance floor linger for a while. Just for aesthetics, I’m throwing into the picture Jake Jenkins, so that there’d be a devastatingly beautiful brunette to round out the hunky blond and ripped red-head trifecta. Before my imagination runs away with me entirely, let me just note that I strongly suspect that every Kid Karisma new release will be accompanied by speculation as to whether each new opponent might be the sore loser in question. Until Kid K spills the beans, we’ll just be left with the awesome delights of seeing him work his magic against the likes of sweaty muscle hunks like Austin Cooper. That will certainly tide me over in the mean time!

Kid K looks leathered up and ready to party down

Odysseus Arrives

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I completely understand why 44% of you selected wrestling hunk Jake Jenkins as the homoerotic wrestler who best embodies the spirit of Odysseus. He was the runaway winner in the field of 6 nominees (7, really, since SP put in a write-in vote for Wade Cutler). Reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month Rex Braddock, looking an awful lot like Steeve Reeves from his sword and sandal film days, had support early in the voting. But tough young Jake came from behind to spank Rex’s bubble butt handily, garnering 2 votes to his 1 when all was said and done.

When Jake hit the scene as the very definition of Rock Hard Wrestling, I had a hit from the chatter that we were falling into two categories: Jake Jenkins fanatics vs Austin Cooper fanatics. There’s not a thing wrong with blond bombshell Austin, mind you, but I was instantly in the Jake camp. He’s clearly a well-trained athlete, including bringing solid amateur wrestling skills with him to the ring. Kid Karisma probably put it best, dubbing Jake a “fucking monkey” for his ability to climb and jump, swing from the ropes and leap through the air inside the ring. Needless to say, he’s also hot as hell. And he’s quickly developed great instincts for selling a story, conquering more than his fair share of bigger opponents and also suffering like someone with intimate knowledge of what it feels like to get owned.
More to the point of Jake-as-Odysseus, he can totally work for me as a Greek hero, fearlessly facing the wrath of the gods determined to break him in body and spirit. His hot muscled body trapped, squeezed, and tied up helplessly by one sadistic opponent after another (particularly in his BGE work) makes it no stretch at all to think of him as the pawn of Olympus, battered, beaten, crushed and humiliated, but never completely broken.
There’s a virtuous “everyman” quality about Odysseus that Jake just barely qualifies for in my book. If Odysseus didn’t have a little god-spunk in his own genetic recipe, Jake might look just too tasty for the role. But Jake works an awfully compelling mixture of both cocky self-confidence and intoxicating vulnerability at the same time. Through sheer grit, he can endure apparently endless suffering to overcome the odds and bring a relative giant to his knees. In expert hands, though, he can also get chipped away, his iron clad core of muscle and fortitude that much more luscious as he goes down time after time to the dark powers of domination and injustice.
Odysseus brushes against complete destruction over and over again. He’s a mere mortal (a hot, macho, battle-sculpted mortal, of course), so against the divine interference of gods and demigods, he’s tricked and toppled repeatedly. He’s helpless and hopeless, if not for divine intervention that allows him to fight another day. And when it comes to Jake, there are few wrestlers currently in the business who I’d rather see soaked in hard-working sweat, tied up bare assed and in agony like a pretzel, refusing to submit despite facing absolutely zero chance of extricating himself from his tragic circumstances.

BG East Arena has preview pics of Jake in a Wet and Wild match, soaked in see-through speedos, on the edge of getting drowned by Poseidon/Christian Taylor. There are some homoerotic wrestlers that I love watching in a squash (either end of the stick), but Jake, like Odysseus, is most entertaining and lovely when he’s working, working hard, struggling, fighting, battling with every awesome muscle and acrobatic ability, straining to keep me entirely wrapped up in the suspense.

And speaking of suspense, thanks for your words of encouragement and support in my own epic journey to get home. Happily, I finally made it!

Kicking Ass and Taking Names

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When I posted the reader’s choice poll last month for the rookie with the best potential in homoerotic wrestling, I was floored to get a note from my current pick as top contender for the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy division). BG East’s Kid Karisma named a couple of the candidates he’d like to get his hands on. I assured him that I’d like very much to see his hands on them, and then I quickly followed up with an interview request. After juggling holiday travels and work obligations, we finally got on the line together for a candid interview yesterday. As you’d expect from the likes of Kid Karisma, he doesn’t pull any punches. He names names and calls them like he sees them. His blunt honesty blew me away and sent me scurrying to my library of Kid K matches to “study” them some more with his insider perspective filling in the background. So turn down the lights, kick up the house music, and settle in for a hot conversation with BG East’s hardbodied party boy himself: Kid Karisma.

Bard: So thank you so much, Kid Karisma, for talking with me today. I’m a huge fan, so this is quite a thrill! To start us off, I just wanted to share an observation: having watched several of your BG East matches, it appears to me that you enjoy dominating an opponent almost as much as your fans enjoy watching you do it. Is that accurate?

Kid Karisma: That is correct! Well, it’s not that I like to dominate. It’s more that I like to show I am in charge, and how do I make sure they understand that? I make them feel humility. [laughing]


Kid Karisma: In Charge
Bard: That sounds like a fine distinction, but I think I understand. You enjoy making sure your opponents know their place… under you and at your mercy.
Kid Karisma: Exactly! And lets face it…most of them think they can hang, but I have way too much energy!
Bard: You’ve got amazing tenacity! Well, amazing everything, but your staying power is astonishing. I’ve noticed that, sooner or later, every opponent finds himself on his back in one of your schoolboy pins with your crotch shoved in his face. First of all, excellent work! Second, do you have any holds or maneuvers that you particularly enjoy inflicting on an opponent?
Kid Karisma: Well something that I started recently in the ring is tangling someone in the ropes to show off their body and have total access to punishing them. I did it against Z-man and Jenkins…talk about fun!  And on a mat I mainly like to crank the neck towards a mirror and have them admire my strength.

Kid K teaching Z-Man the ropes of BG East wrestling
Bard: Those are two excellent strategies that I certainly recognize from your body of work (that I’ve studied extensively). I know it’s a cliché question, but I’ve got to ask it: of the 10 matches BG East has released of yours, do you have a favorite?
Kid Karisma:  Christian Taylor is just fun to wrestle…love that body! Len Harder was feisty. But Jake Jenkins was a challenge and fun, so that one easily wins.  He is small, but his wrestling background and agility made it rather difficult. Plus, imagine getting a hold of that body! Well. I don’t have to! [laughing]
Kid K can feel Jake’s body melting
Bard:  Your match with Jake is a work of art! Damn, you two are an incredible pair in the ring together, and your complete destruction of him is epic. Any particular moment of that match stand out for you, in addition to tying him up in the ropes, as you mentioned before?
Kid Karisma:  I mean, I truly got to work him over completely! But when I had him in the Boston or bent over my knee…God, you can just feel his body melting and weakening…pretty epic.
Bard: Definitely! You mentioned your match with Z-Man and tying him up in the ropes as well. There was a moment where he you hung him over the top rope like the laundry, took a step back to look at him, and then commented, “Looks damn good from over here.” What do you find attractive in an opponent?
Kid Karisma: Well, there are different things I like within all my opponents, but the one thing that always gets me is a beat down opponent.  When you look at them and you know “I just made him my bitch,” that gives me goose bumps just talking about it! I just like to win, and I just happen to be a bad ass in the process.
Bard: Well, I’ve got goose bumps now, too. You are most definitely a bad ass, in the best sense of the term! BG East describes you as 5’8″ tall and 170 pounds, but somehow I find that hard to believe. You sure can fill up a camera with all those amazing muscles! Are those stats accurate?
Kid Karisma: Well, I fluctuate. In my matches against Z-man and Jenkins I was at about 180, possibly even closer to 185. I was pretty damn solid. I have thick legs so that always gives me a very stout look.            I played rugby for many years and started again recently so that’s where that build comes from.  When I played at the University, my legs were double the size.
Bard:  My goose bumps have goose bumps now! Solid is definitely one word that springs to mind when I picture you in the ring. You’ve got amazing legs, so trying to imagine them double the size is blowing my mind! As someone who clearly, and deservedly, loves his body, what would you say is your best body part right now?

 Kid Karisma: Well if I said anything but my ass, people wouldn’t take me seriously. It’s fucking huge! And all muscle, I would like to add! But, I say my arms! I have some serious peaks on my biceps, and have you seen my tri’s?
Kid K shows off his… triceps.
Bard: When I’ve been able to tear my eyes away from your muscled ass, yes I’ve appreciated your upper arms quite a lot. Wrapped around the throat of an opponent, they’re profoundly moving to see! What sort of workout routine do you have to sculpt your body so successfully?
Kid Karisma:  I must admit I have been working out for over 13 years now. So I have done it all. But my workout mantra is Form and Focus: Proper form while focusing on the muscle and high reps work wonders. Also, it’s 80% diet. That’s the hard part.  I was raised to be a jock I guess; maybe that’s where my attitude comes from. [laughing]
Bard:  Sounds like your physique is well earned! You know, of course, that you have an army of Kid Karisma fanatics that are completely in awe of the sight of you flexing those peaked biceps over a crushed opponent. What’s it like knowing that you’ve got fans swooning over every inch of you?
Kid Karisma:  Well it is very humbling, first and foremost, I must say! I am always flattered to hear compliments (even though most are deserved), and without the fans supporting me, well you know…you were just there… The Boss wouldn’t schedule me to beat up some punks. But at the end of the day, my body helps, but it’s my attitude that my fans really love.  Look at how many worthless pretty boys wrestle for various companies. Nothing but bodies with nothing behind them, a pretty face to beat, if you ask me. The Boss honored me with kid and karisma, because he saw something. Let’s face it; I earned the right to be swooned over. Also, for every person that thinks I am hot, there is one that hates me. At the end of the day none of those punks would say it to my face though! [laughing]
           
Bard:  I think that’s really why I picture you as a foot taller and 30 pounds heavier… it’s that ferocious, huge, gigantic confidence you have! And I’m certain you are absolutely right that’s what fans are so crazy about. Well, that and your superhuman ass. So speaking of Kid Leopard, how did you first get involved with BG East? Did The Boss happen to see your gargantuan thighs sprinting down a rugby pitch?
Red Baron teaches Kid K what friends are for
Kid Karisma:  No, nothing like that. My best friend, who’s been a fan of BGE for a very long time, got the chance to audition with them a few years back. He dragged me along for moral support. The next thing I knew, I was suited up and facing off in a three-way with my friend, aka “Red Baron,” and Cage Thunder. Before I walked out the door, the BG East boys were asking for more Kid Karisma.
Bard: We all owe a debt of gratitude to Red Baron! So, personally I try to avoid bad mouthing any of you gutsy wrestlers who work so hard to bring us such pleasure, but I love to hear the dish. Any inside scoop you’d like to share about any of your competition? Any wrestlers out there that you’d like to tell us fans what you really think of them?
Kid Karisma: [Laughing] Well, there is one guy, but the match hasn’t been released. It was easily the most intense match I have ever done. He hated my guts, and he hated the fact that I was much stronger and boisterous. Here’s the deal, if you ever had a chance to meet me, you’d know that all I want is to party. So all the haters I wrestle end up partying with me, and they end up loving me! Except one! [Laughing]
           
Bard: Oh my God. As soon as that match is released, I’m hitting you up for a follow-up interview to hear more about that! You’re most recent match was against Hoyt Riley who ended up putting a tick in the Kid K loss column. How the hell did that happen?
Hoyt Riley drops some hurt on Kid K
Kid Karisma: Listen… first off, fat ass sat on me!
Bard: [laughing]
Kid Karisma: …And I was still hungover as fuck! So go him.
Bard: Sounds like that one may still sting a little. What about some of the other wrestlers you’ve faced?
Kid Karisma: Jake is like a little fucking monkey.  I have never seen someone jump around as much as him.  Too bad that didn’t help him! In the end, he is just a kid…a nice kid…and I am Kid Karisma… or also known as a bad ass!   And as much as I will get shit for this from both The Boss and the fans…who in the fucking world taught Garza to wrestle? I thought they did a better job in Mexico! I mean, I have a luchadore mask out of respect… but give me a fucking break. But he is fucking hot! You should see his ass up close…mouth watering.
Bard: Indeed, my mouth is watering as we speak!

Kid K has some ideas about what to do to Christian Taylor’s body
Kid Karisma:  And I wish I could have Christian on a mat only. The things I would do to his body. Well, yeah, your blog is x-rated, right!? [laughing]
Bard: Do NOT hold anything back on my account! This is fantastic stuff!
Kid K is confident Rocco remembers this fondly
Kid Karisma: Oh, and remember Gear Wars against Rocco?
Bard: Extremely fondly, yes I remember it.
Kid Karisma: God! He fucking thought he was God’s gift to the world. I showed him who mac daddy at the end of the day is!
Bard: That you did! He looked seriously put out to get owned so completely by you. I’d be hard pressed to believe he walked away letting bygones be bygones after he squirmed so bitterly with your ass planted on his face.
Kid Karisma: Listen…if you remember, he tried to get out of shit quick, and I let him sometimes. But he loved every second and every drop of sweat of mine on him.  I’m pretty sure he still plays with his hole thinking about my ass, socks and whatnot in his face!
Bard: [Laughing] That’s hilarious!… and seriously turning me on. We’d better change the subject before I completely lose my focus. So are there any wrestlers you haven’t faced yet who you’d like to introduce to the ropes?
Kid Karisma: It’s not like I have a thing for taller, or shorter for the matter, but tight lean bodies.
Bard: You’re ready to work over anyone with a tight, lean body?
Kid Karisma: Yeah, and some other fat ass to redeem myself! There are a couple of pretty boys out there that I would like to get my hands on.  Can I just say, “Bend over… I mean GIVE!”
Bard: I pity any opponent who isn’t in top condition when they face off with you. Strike that. I envy any opponent that faces off with you. You’re an artist! Any pretty boys you’d like to name, or should we just leave it at that?
Kid K says Kirby Stone “looks like he’d
love to get beaten by me.”
Kid Karisma: Well, there are a few out there.  You know that innocent kid, Stone or whatever…he looks like he would love to get beaten by me.  He could be fun.  Or some novice hot kid that needs a good beating into the game [laughing]. I may actually pop one for that…especially when they can’t figure out what just hit them.
Bard: Kirby Stone? Hot damn, that would be incredible! And if you “pop one,” I’m buying two copies (if we’re talking about the same thing). You’ve been incredibly generous with your time and remarkably candid! I feel like you’ve given us some amazing insight into what makes you such a hot commodity in the ring and on the mat. Before I let you go, is there anything else that you’d like fans to know about you when you aren’t conquering one pretty boy after another for BG East?
Kid Karisma: You are very welcome, and it was definitely fun chatting with you, even though I got a bit wordy here and there. You know us shit talkers can’t help it! [laughing]  I want to thank everyone for their continued support while I am developing as a wrestler, and there are many more hot matches planned that continue showing me at what I do best: kicking ass and taking names! Also, remember that without all of the supporters out there, I won’t get to demolish hot ass boys…and what a shame that would be. I also would like to thank you for taking the time to talk to me, and it definitely has been a pleasure. Plus it’s awesome to have someone so attentive listen to me rant! [laughing]
Bard: The pleasure, I assure you, is entirely mine! On behalf of a whole lot of us, we can’t wait to watch you put more pretty boys in their place, and by that I mean sandwiched between your monster thighs, crushed beneath your epic ass, or choked by your python arms! We’ll keep buying them and loving them as long as you keep knocking them down!
           
Kid Karisma: Sweet. Have a good day!
Bard: You too!

Kid Karisma, ready to party

Playing God

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I’ve been thinking about friends and family on the East Coast and hoping that everyone is surviving the aftermath of Hurricane Irene. AH emailed me this morning from his smart phone to let me know that he’s been without power for 24 hours and amusing himself with the mental game of assembling his ideal wrestler’s body from the component parts of many different wrestlers. In honor of AH and everyone mopping up from that messy bitch, Irene, I decided to quickly put together a post playing AH’s game of ordering up my ideal wrestler’s body a la carte.

Turns out, this is one tough game to play! I set out for myself the task of choosing no more than one body part from any one wrestler. Then I went to scouring my mental and literal library of homoerotic wrestling favorites to decide who to deconstruct in order to reconstruct into the assemblage of an over the top, made to order homoerotic wrestling god. I spun my wheels for quite a while getting a start on this project. There are so many wrestlers who I think of as possessing physical perfection, but many of them don’t necessarily possess the perfect singular body part divorced from the rest. But body part by body part, this is what I came up with:

For some reason, it worked for me to start from the bottom and work my way up my mad scientist construction of the ideal wrestling body. My Frankenstein’s monster of physical wrestling perfection has Troy Baker’s legs. Troy was in the running for nearly every body part, frankly, but it was Troy’s own love his legs that made me single them out for this recipe.  Thick and hard without a whisper of body fat, Troy’s legs were simply perfection, as far as I’m concerned. When he had Nick Archer’s noggin’ trapped between his crushing thighs, Troy looked like he was just about to cum with delight in the overpowering beauty of his dominating power. Though Troy did not literally cum in that moment, I’m certain that I’m not alone when I say that I certainly did, and have repeatedly, in worshipful lust for Troy’s unbelievable legs.

Hanging between my assembled wrestling’s god’s ripped thighs is Brian Maxon’s cock and balls. Between you and me, Brian Maxon’s wrestling usually left me a little uninspired. His cock, however, once unsheathed and getting worshipped by the loser he conquered on the mats, was pretty nearly my impression of phallic perfection. There are most certainly longer wrestling cocks, and a few thicker, but Brian’s cock was a perfectly proportioned monster that demanded to be be worshipped.

Spin my cut-n-paste wrestling god around and you’ll get a sight of the most gorgeous homoerotic wrestling glutes on the planet, which actually belong and fit so beautifully on the body of  Kid Karisma. Quite literally, I’ve put in a pitch for a wrestler spotlight DVD that stars Kid K’s ass, specifically. Somewhere (I can’t put my finger on the text at the moment… I think Joe wrote it), I saw Kid K described as a Tom of Finland drawing come to life. It’s the ass that makes that statement 110% true (see recent posts regarding my mathematical shortcomings).

Allowing our eyes to wander upward from Kid K’s perfect ass, we would find on my assembly of a made-to-order wrestling god the back of Brett Mycles. A thickly muscled back is a thing of wonder. I’ve seen some inspiring pec frottage, but I’m still looking for a scene of a wrestler working out an ecstatic explosion in the deep cravasse between the mountainous bulges of a muscled back like Brett’s. The aesthetics of a narrow, corded lower back beneath an astonishingly wide and contoured lat spread capped off by thick delt and trap muscles is just about the most beautiful thing in the world, I think.

Again, let’s spin my wrestling creation around now to take a look at the front, where he’s sporting Rafe Sanchez’ abdominal muscles. I’ve ranted a bit before (perhaps unfairly) about comments in a discussion group that referred disparagingly to Rafe’s body as “not the best.” I couldn’t disagree more, not in total, and most certainly not when it comes to the marble sculpture that are his abdominals and obliques. Add a cup of water and a squirt of detergent and I swear to you it would require not more than three passes to get your laundry clean on that washboard! The separation between each scale of that armor is superhuman. I’d want no one else’s ripped to shreds core on my wrestling god assemblage.

As our eyes wander upward from Rafe’s rocking abs, we’ll see the luscious pecs of Darius. Choosing whose pecs to add to my homoerotic wrestling god was perhaps the most difficult selection of all. If I hadn’t already cannibalized Troy Baker’s legs, his pecs very well could’ve beat out Darius’. As it is though, it’s Darius’ monster pecs that made the shortlist. Hot. Damn.

Shoulders were another tough call for me, but I decided that my homoerotic wrestling god of my own creation will have Wade Cutler’s delts. The mountainous, angular boulders that were Wade’s shoulders always completely captivated me, and they still do today as I treasure the moments where Wade shows up in my library of homoerotic wrestling. Massive, wide, veiny shoulders are intensely erotic, not to mention damn useful in a fierce wrestling contest. My wrestling god compilation sports the best shoulders I could think of.

Again, arms were difficult to select, owing to the deep field of worthy applicants. I’m giving a nod to rookie beauty, Thiago Diaz, however, because his arms are stunning.  With arms it’s certainly not all about size. Shape, proportion, balance and definition speak to me more when it comes to arms than blunt size. Thiago’s bulging biceps and massively thick forearms are entirely worthy additions to the wrestling god of my creation.

Finally, capping off the physical perfection of my wrestling god creation is the devastatingly handsome face of Brad Rochelle. Brad was in a barnburner of a race against exactly one other gorgeously handsome homoerotic wrestling hunk to lend his face to my creation. It was the cleft chin that just 5 seconds ago made me select Brad’s perfect visage.

Of course, this ideal homoerotic wrestling body I’ve just created requires some extensive smoothing and adjusting to match up size, complexion, and proportion. And I’m already thinking that, while this fits my “Muscle Worshipper” type that I scored highest on in yesterday’s quiz from Manof1000Holds, an equally perfect body would be made of entirely different parts to construct my idea of perfection when it comes to a pretty boy (okay, some of the same parts would certainly apply), or a bad boy.

Excellent exercise, AH! I hope you’re managing to keep yourself entertained as you wait for the power to come back on. So whose parts would comprise your ideal homoerotic wrestler?

Diverse Tastes – Guest Contributor Cage Thunder

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While there are a lot of us armchair homoerotic wrestling bloggers, I’m the first to tip my hat to a blogger like Cage Thunder, who not only writes eloquently about his tastes and twists in wrestling kink, he’s also an all-in wrestler on camera for BG East. Through a series of correspondence between me and Cage Thunder, I will dare to reveal one thing that I’ve learned about the mysterious masked heel: he’s a class act. He has a delightful sense of humor that goes well beyond his gloating, clucking delight in humiliating one all-too-pretty pretty boy after another. He also has a remarkable depth to him that leads him to contemplate the alchemy of homoerotic wrestling kink with a fervor and meticulousness that very well may surpass even my own. So when Cage Thunder agreed to give me his take on the topic of “Diverse Tastes” as part of neverland’s summer series of guest contributors, I was deeply honored. So sit back and learn from a master who knows his wrestling kink from inside out and every angle a delightfully twisted wrestling mind and body can imagine.
The Turning Point
by Cage Thunder
BG East’s Cage Thunder

There is a certain moment in every pro wrestling match that, without fail, always grabs my attention. This moment never fails to get my attention and always make my dick stand up at attention.

I call this moment the turning point.

Bulldog Barzini savors the sight of Denny Cartier
reaching “the turning point” – BG East’s Fantasymen 28

A turning point is exactly what it sounds like—that definitive moment when you know that one of the wrestlers is finished— even if he isn’t being pinned or counted out or giving in a submission, and the match might go on for a while longer (and usually does). But that’s the moment when you know for certain who the stud is who’s going to have his arms raised in complete victory at the end of the match (or fall, if it’s a best-of situation).

I love that moment.

Muscle heel Kid Karisma drags muscle twink Christian Taylor
beyond the turning point – BG East’s Wet &  Wild 5

When I was growing up, professional wrestling was my porn. It still is, to a degree—only I rarely watch it on television, I satisfy my fetish with videos these days—but when I was a kid, it was a world I desperately wanted to be a part of. I greatly enjoyed the morality plays of pro wrestling matches, the struggle between good and evil, hero versus villain, rule-breaking versus following the rules. And like life, good didn’t always triumph over evil.

Cage Thunder soaks in the sight of his handiwork –
BG East’s Masked Mayhem 6

But professional wrestling was also one of the very few places on television in those days where you could see scantily dressed men sweating and heaving, clinching and coming apart, entwining their bodies in an almost erotic dance. And while I always wanted the nasty heels to be punished for their dastardly ways, I also loved watching the gorgeous ones suffer at their hands. With the advent of cable television and Ted Turner taking WTBS national into a self-styled Super Station, every Saturday afternoon from three to five p.m. Pacific times Georgia Championship Wrestling aired—and I fell in lust with a gorgeously built mullet-wearing muscle boy named Brad Armstrong.

The muscles and the mullet – Brad Armstrong
Oh, that ass. If I hadn’t already known I was gay, Brad Armstrong’s tight trunks clinging ever so tenaciously to those perfectly formed buttocks certainly would have done the trick.
Brad Armstrong’s inspiring ass in trouble
Brad was a good wrestler—a fan favorite, obviously, with his athletic ability, sexy body, and ‘aw shucks’ attitude. But he lost his matches more frequently than he won them—and week after week, I slowly came to realize that what was really turning my crank and getting my dick hard was watching some nasty ass heel put him through the wringer—watching him suffer on the mat, one foot bouncing up and down as his back arched and that ass, that oh-so-perfect ass, with his trunks creeping up bit by bit, up in the air.

Brad’s trunks creeping up his ass as he suffers humiliatingly in the ropes

And I also came to the conclusion that I preferred watching Brad suffer rather than being dominant in a match—which made me stop and think.

Brad Armstrong where he did his best work: on his back,
feet pointed at the ceiling, and his opponent copping a feel of that rocking ass!

And I realized the truth is I wanted to fuck him—in other words, I wanted to dominate him and make him submissive to me. I wanted to beat him down, make him call me sir, and when that hard muscle ass arched up in the air, I wanted to reach down and peel those green trunks off him, lube up my cock, and ride him while he bucked and writhed and moaned.

And called me “sir.”

I’m frequently accused of being a ‘body fascist,’ and nothing could be further from the truth. I actually like all kinds of men, in all shapes and sizes—what I am actually attracted to, more than anything else, is a particular attitude that a lot of wrestlers seem to have. (This is why I generally don’t give a shit about watching gay porn—very few gay porn stars have that ‘certain something special’ that gets my dick hard, and let’s face it—if you’ve seen one fuck scene, you’ve pretty much seen them all. Ty Lebeouf is a gay porn star who is one of the exceptions—and he is exceptional, although I’d much rather watch him climb in the ring.) A wrestler can have the most gorgeous body you’ve ever seen, and a huge bulge in the front of his trunks—but if the attitude I like isn’t there, he just leaves me cold. (I won’t give examples, out of respect.)

Porn star Ty Lebeouf: Ready to Wrestle?

The wrestlers I like—the ones that make me open my wallet and spend my hard-earned money buying their videos—have that attitude. It’s not something that’s quantifiable or definable; someone either has it or they don’t. And there really isn’t a rhyme or reason to my attraction to them. They can be a muscle twink, like Christian Taylor, or a hot little muscle heel like Kid Karisma, or a stocky brute like Bulldog Barzini, or a beautiful babyface who has crazy mad ring skills but always loses—like Alexi Adamov.

Cage Thunder revels in dragging babyface Alexi Adamov
well past “the turning point” – BG East’s Masked Mayhem 2

I like heels because the only way someone can ever fuck me is if they dominate me. And I do like being dominated. I like being forced to submit, I like being forced to scream out a submission or call my foe “sir”—and if he can beat me down that way, I’m his for the taking and he can do with me as he pleases. The thought of being worked over like that by a Bob Orton or a Stan Hansen or any number of studly heels who might not have the body beautiful you’d see on the cover of a gay porn magazine turns me on as much as the thought of beating down some beautiful babyface/jobber does.

A heel who could have made Cage Thunder cry, “Sir!”

For me, that’s the answer to why people enjoy seeing pretty muscle boys just get the shit kicked out of them. Because we want to dominate them, we want to fuck them, and the wrestling match we are watching is a kind of pornographic dance of domination and submission.

Cage Thunder has his way with a puddle-on-the-mat, Jobe Zander –
BG East’s Masked Mayhem 8

And I love, love, LOVE the turning point—when the heel begins to simply toy with his opponent for our viewing pleasure.

Cage Thunder conquers, strips, and toys with Lobolito –
BG East Masked Mayhem 3

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a DVD to watch.

——————
Now, aren’t we all dying to know what gorgeous-bodied and huge-bulged wrestlers leave Cage Thunder limp!? Like I said, however, he’s a class act who isn’t one to crush-and-tell. For this fantastic glimpse into precisely the moment, the attitude, and the acts of domination that make his dick stand up at attention, neverland is honored to have guest contributor Cage Thunder push the pause button and share his thoughts with us!

The Taste of Victory

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Thank God I’m done with traveling… for a few weeks. Back in the comforts of my own home, I’m able to settle into the familiar routines, including carving out some time for one of my most enjoyable pass-times: appreciating homoerotic wrestling.
With my attention renewed on the topic that you and I find so enjoyable, I’m feeling the need to make aright my neglect of my reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month: Kid Karisma. Typically by now, I’d have at least one or two posts vetting and venerating the hard working hunk who so ably captured the title at the beginning of the month. It’s certainly not as if I’m at a loss for things to say as I marvel at the body and body of work of the Karismatic one! I could write an encyclopedia of attributes that make Kid K such a commanding favorite of mine, and for which he also recently muscled his way past Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) to claim the top contender spot for my overall favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division. There’s nowhere on Kid K’s body or in his wrestling arsenal that wouldn’t be appropriate to slow down and marvel for a while, but let me just start in a particular spot that’s been particularly responsible for my growing infatuation with the red-headed muscle hunk: his lips.
Perhaps this isn’t the particular geography that you’d have selected to begin to admire the remarkable assets of Kid Karisma, but it’s his liplocks that have been topping me off lately. I don’t own Kid K’s entirely library of work yet, but I believe that exactly twice he’s capped off a crushing victory over an awestruck opponent by grabbing the lucky, lucky loser’s head and commandingly, lingeringly sucking face.
The first time I caught sight of this truly inspired moment of Kid Karisma homoeroticism was in the Karismatic one’s hard-fought conquering of that stubbornly tough twink-punk, Len Harder in Sexy Showdown 5: Florida Fun. The sight of these two hot-and-bothered, sweaty specimens teetering on the edge of aggression and affection is profoundly stimulating for me. Kid K’s rippled, rock hard body stretched overtop of Len, crotch-to-crotch and lips-to-lips, makes me gasp. And then when Len sweetly, gently grabs Kid K’s gorgeous round glutes in both hands, as the red-headed juggernaut shoves his tongue down Len’s throat, all of my homoerotic wrestling kink synapses fire at once.
Despite less skin, Kid Karisma’s make-out with Christian Taylor in Wet & Wild 5 is arguably even more arousing for me. Despite being a half a foot shorter than Christian, Kid K is simply much more than Christian can handle. Kid K is cocky and taunting. He gives away just a little bit of riding time, but the match both in the pool and on the mat poolside is essentially and entirely in Kid K’s quite able hands. It’s a bit like watching a beautiful house cat drag a poor mouse inside to play with it mercilessly until he’s killed the rodent like his instincts demand. Kid K laughs at poor Christian. He smirks at Christian’s hopeless attempts to secure an advantage. Any moment that Christian rallies every ounce of strength and will to power to the top, Kid K just lets him tire himself out and than smacks him back down with contempt. And then when Christian is completely wasted, flat on his back, having submitted repeatedly until he barely has the strength to submit again, Kid K chokes Christian out cold with a completely unnecessary figure-4 clamped like a steel pipe across the loser’s throat.
That would’ve been enough to satisfy my devotion to a seriously sexy homoerotic wrestling beatdown. Christian suffers valiantly like the handsome, tall drink of water he is. Kid K preens and revels in his complete domination over his outmatched opponent. Tick, tick… all the boxes checked. This will be a match to come back to again and again. But then…
… Kid Karisma stretches across Christian’s motionless, supine body and wakes the spent stud with an almost compassionate kiss. Now that’s a way to wake up! Completing the fantasy that I’m too often left to write in my own imagination, Kid K quite literally savors the taste of his victory, and Christian realizes that every second of the whole humiliating, painful encounter was completely worth it. Compassion turns to passion, and the two handsome faces are locked together as Kid K assists the woozy contender to his feet. Sealing the deal, Christian grabs a handful of the Karismatic one’s meaty ass as he’s led inside for a post-match reconciliation.
There’s a lot that I could (and let’s face it, that I will) obsess lustfully about when it comes to Kid Karisma’s body and wrestling accomplishments. But it’s what he’s willing to do with those sweet, hot lips of his that make him rise to the top of what I enjoy most in homoerotic wrestling. I realize that not everyone enjoys seeing kissing in their homoerotic wrestling fare. In fact, I’ve heard from some of you that it’s a turn-off. Mores-the-better for the diverse industry that feeds our cravings. As for me, however, the marriage of skilled wrestling storytelling with homo-sensibilities of erotic pleasure is the essence of what arouses me most (full stop). For Kid K’s full arsenal of skills, especially including his liplocks, his stock is very much on the rise in my infatuations. In no small part due to everywhere his lips have been, Kid Karisma is sitting pretty atop the throne as my reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month.

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

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July has been full of unfortunate distractions from my devotions to homoerotic wrestling. Too much travel and way too much work have kept my attention divided. So awarding this month’s title of homoerotic wrestler of the month may very well be a bit slipshod. My way is to pour over the nominees with a passionate commitment to rigorously apply all of the steps of the scientific method in eliminating all but the singularly most worthy wrestler who has appeared in a homoerotic wrestling new release in the previous calendar month. I tend to favor laying out all of the contenders one by one for your and my consideration before the unveiling. I like both the vetting process as it lends itself to a more carefully considered decision, and I also like the opportunity to offer a send up to all of the hardworking wrestlers putting their bodies to the test for our entertainment and edification. This time around, however, I’m skipping past the examination of the field. That’s not to say that I haven’t done my due diligence, but I’m just a little too distracted to paint you the full landscape. I looked at offerings from Naked Kombat, BG East, Can-Am, Rock Hard Wrestling, and Thunder’s Arena. I was deeply aroused by a few. One, however, stood head-and-shoulders above the rest, and frankly, it’s probably long-overdue that he sat atop the throne. My newly crowned homoerotic wrestler of the month is….

…BG East’s Kid Karisma.

I don’t suppose it should come as a surprise, considering that Kid K’s masterful Hunkbash on last month’s homoerotic wrestler of the month, Jake Jenkins, earned Kid K the rare move into the coveted #2 spot in my overall favorite homoerotic wrestler -non-pornboy division. Kid K wrestles rookie Jake like a Cordon Bleu graduate plating fois gras (I’m seriously working the metaphors, lately). He slaps Jake down, spreads him out with an expert touch, and positions him for maximum, mouthwatering viewing.
Hunkbash 12 makes me mentally place Kid Karisma into the remarkable stable of newly came-of-age gorgeous hunks at BG East who are ravenous to serve up rookie initiation. It seems like only yesterday, Kid K was fresh meat (and what meat!) slapping down his junk to see how he measures up against the baddest and the fiercest. Our boy’s all grown up now, my friends, and his torpedo delivery of bashing, twisting, and cranking agony on body beautiful young Jake is perfectly seasoned to taste (at least my taste!).
Like all beautiful bad asses, Kid K loves his body, as well he should. Wrestling is foreplay for Kid K, merely the setting for jerking himself harder and harder toward self-worshipping ecstasy (not that I’ve ever seen Kid K cum on camera, but I’m still hoping he’ll make that leap into the pornboy division!). And he has every right to be as captivated with the sight of his own rippled physique as he is (and I am). He’s 5’8″ and 170 pounds of sculpted granite. And in a world full of blonds, bleach blonds and brunettes, a freckle-faced, fiery red-head both stands out and brings me to full attention. And that ass!!!!
I consider it a testimony to my superhuman willpower that it’s taken me this long to mention Kid Karisma’s unbelievably gorgeous glutes. Seriously, you could feed a hungry family of 4 for a month on the meat hanging off his backside (…too much? I warned you I pushing my metaphors hard lately!). Surely that ass could turn the most adamant bottom into a raging top, and speaking on behalf of gay men everywhere (across the planet, every last one of them!), I’m praying that Kid K plays for our team and makes some man/men insanely satisfied with pounding that muscle butt until all parties pass out from exhaustion. If he isn’t, I’m first in line to do my very best to convince him otherwise (first, I said! back of the line, the rest of you!).
Tapping Kid Karisma as my new homoerotic wrestler of the month is a recognition of the strong, hard, arousing body of work that Kid K has been adding to his CV in the past few years, putting in the training, sweat, and tears that are clearly evident in his taking full ownership of Jake Jenkins in body and soul. Truth be told, Kid Karisma probably has every right to snap me into a bearhug and demand to know why it’s taken so long for him to get the nod. All I can really say to that is bring it on, bad boy!

Divinity and a Spanking

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Someone (and he knows who he is) deserves a stern spanking for delaying for a couple of days my opportunity to rip open a certain padded manilla envelope with the treasure Hunkbash 12 inside. One viewing of Kid Karisma offering No Mercy to  Jake Jenkins, however, and my thoughts of needing to spank someone have evaporated… for now….

Holy…. shit. Good God almighty. Sweet Jesus! There’s just no other way to describe it. This was a religious experience for me. I am completely captivated and captured by this match!

Kid K and Jake tell a truly classic pro tale. The rookie is all eager, flexing in the locker room mirror, tucking in the drawstrings of his stark, white speedos and pulling up his kneepads. He’s a rock hard, barefoot warrior ready to conquer. Like a spider, however, Kid K descends in black boots, black knee pads, and black trunks. A locker room ambush is the rookie’s first lesson: always keep looking over your shoulder, Jake!

It’s a schooling, nearly from start to finish. Kid K drags the rookie around, quite literally by the scruff of his neck. He toys with Jake. He preens and proves over and over that this is “sport” only in the sense that shooting clay pigeons from the deck of a cruise ship is sport. Lightweight hunk Jake is easy prey for being tossed and flipped, hurled and hammered mercilessly by a salivating Kid K. The Kid sets his sights early and unceasingly on Jake’s beautiful lower back. A few body slams to soften him up set the stage for the first of several excruciatingly lingering camel clutches that stretch and strain Jake’s neck and back. Prying the rookie’s head sharply backward with a fistful of hair on one hand, Kid K crunches out a massively peaked single bicep with his other, all to the soundtrack of Jake sobbing in agony.

Kid K is nastier than I’ve ever seen him, and he’s punching every button I’ve got. He looks like he relishes every boot he pounds into Jake’s naked back almost as much as he’s seriously getting off on flexing and posing over top of the battered rookie. I expect Kid K at any moment to yank down his trunks and pound out a couple of quarts in eye fluttering ecstasy. He doesn’t, of course… me, on the other hand….

Kid K is like a master artist in this match.  He has a delightful knack for carefully positioning almost every long, lingeringly held hold so that he (and we) can admire both his and Jake’s ripped bodies. There are no wasted motions, nothing abrupt or interrupted as the master chips away at this masterpiece. Right around 7 minutes into the match, he has Jake weeping in another camel clutch. As the camera zooms in for a close up, Kid K looks right at you and me with a sly grin, even as he barks at Jake, “Give up!?” He captures Jake’s chin in his left hand and pries the rookie’s head both backward and around, making the veins in Jake’s neck rise to the surface. When Jake refuses to give, Kid K rocks back and forth, sliding his hips forward and backward, wrenching on the poor rookie’s back that much harder. I swear, it looks like Kid K is dry humping the young stud’s sweaty, corded back.

Kid K pushes his luck, like all narcissists do sooner or later. He throws in one too many showboating cartwheels on his way toward using his body like a battering ram against Jake in the corner. At the last moment, Jake lifts his elbow and catches the red-headed terror in the face. A truly stunning flying head scissors illustrates that Jake is filling out a legitimate pro wrestling arsenal very quickly. Kid K’s unnecessary roughness has bruised hot young Jake’s ego a little too much, perhaps, inspiring the rookie to return the favor and drag Kid K to his feet by an iron clad fistful of hair. The massive sweat stain that Kid K leaves on the mat after getting awesomely flattened by a Jake Jenkins drop kick makes me swoon, hit rewind, swoon again, hit rewind again, and then swoon for a third time. Suplex after sweaty suplex winds the boy in black. But not for long.

Prying Jake’s back like a twist-tie around the ring post is every second as long as it needs to be to get the job done on Kid K’s side of the camera and on mine. And, okay, so I don’t have a strangling fetish, but sweet Jesus, when Kid K plants his claws around Jake’s neck, schoolboy pinning him and making the rookie’s face turn bright red, I can’t deny it. That’s fucking hot!

I can’t decide who’s ass works me harder (though I’d love to give that a road test), Jake’s tightly packed, athletic glutes or Kid Karisma’s mind-blowingly round muscle butt. Jake’s sweet ass is beautifully and generously displayed, as Kid K lifts him off his feet in a groaning, gasping bearhug. A reverse bearhug chaser, gives us a long look at just about every inch of Jake’s dripping body. I swear, a reverse bearhug never looked so much like a power-fuck!

So I’ve got just a few conclusions to wrap up this inadequate attempt to capture a profound spiritual experience. First conclusion, I was never so right as the day I picked Jake Jenkins to be my reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month. I’m on my knees begging the gods to send us more of Jake. Second conclusion, someone (and he knows who he is) seriously needs that spanking for keeping this treasure out of my hands even a second longer than necessary (you didn’t think I’d seriously forgotten!?).

And a third and final conclusion, Kid Karisma can simply do no wrong when it comes to my homoerotic wrestling kink entertainment these days. Time after time, he’s brought his ridiculously sexy brand of nastiness into my wrestling fantasies, doing to one pretty little thing after another, with masterful precision, exactly what I’m longing for him to do. It’s a momentous day, and regular readers can attest that this does not happen all that frequently, but Hunkbash 12 has convinced me without a shadow of a doubt that Kid K has broken into the top ranks of my favorite homoerotic wrestlers – non-pornboys. That’s right, Joshua Goodman! Kid Karisma has refused to call you Mr. Joshua and instead slapped you and your pendulous package back into the ranks of the not-quite contenders. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to see Mr. Joshua claw his way back into contention, but for now, as of this moment, Lon Dumont had better watch his rippled back, because Kid Karisma is my new top contender for the title of my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy.

I’m a Pussy

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Brad Rochelle: BG East’s Backyard Brawls 1
This has come as a bit of a shock to me, but I have to admit it: I am a pussy. Now, I mean that in the most non-misogynistic (and pro-feline) way possible, but frankly, there’s just no way to sugar coat it. I’m a pussy. A few unkind hearts reading this are nodding their heads and snarkily mumbling that it’s about time that I admitted it. Well… fuck you, that’s not what I’m talking about. I don’t back down from a fight, and I’ve been told by several independent sources that when I’m in a particularly serious mood, I remind them of an angry grammar school gym teacher (which, perhaps oddly, I find really flattering). What I am a pussy about, however, is this heat.
Ryon Long & Greg Michaels: BG East’s Backyard Brawls 2

I’d heard that Boston in late July was hot, but somehow I still wasn’t mentally prepared. I catch myself continually bitching and moaning about the heat throughout the day, and I’m not proud of it. I sleep on top of the covers with a fan blowing directly in my face, and still I’m hot. And now a local colleague has mentioned to me that it’s going to “start heating up around here” over the next few days. I almost started to cry. I can’t deny it. I’m a pussy.

Shannon Embry & Jonny Firestorm:
BG East’s The Contract 9

On the other hand, this sort of heat brings out an abundance of bare flesh. And I’ve been very delighted with the hot and bothered eye candy that Boston has to offer. I keep looking for some BG East wrestling hunk strolling down the street (preferably in his skimpiest wrestling trunks). But despite not catching any BG East fanstymen sightings yet, I have to say, I’ve seen some prime beef that very well might be able to give the BG East boys a run for their money (at least in hunky looks… toss them into the ring and I’m sure our BGE battlers would beat the shit out of these downtown posers).

Reigning Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month:
The sweat-soaked gorgeousness o Jake Jenkins
Regular readers also know what a sucker I am for a thick sheen of sweat on a muscled hunk, so just imagine my constant titillation in a city baking their beefy boys with a side of nasty humidity.
Brad Rochelle: The Contract 6

Back to the self-revelation that I’m a pussy, though… as for me, I just don’t have the body chemistry to enjoy baking my own body. Sun bathing is not on my list of enjoyable pass-times. Watching the fine physiques of hot guys sun bathing is an enjoyable pass-time, but even then, it turns out that I’m such a pussy that my own discomfort is distracting me from that most excellent byproduct of a steamy, summer day.

Kid Karisma & Christian Taylor: BG East’s Wet & Wild 5

And frankly, the notion of a wrestling match is almost too much for me to bear. The last thing I feel like doing in this heat is swapping body heat with anyone else in close quarters. This pussiness is profoundly, existentially unsettling the very core of my wrestling kink identity that I typically find as constant as magnetic north. But a whole lot of aggressive, physical exertion at this moment is almost nauseating to think about.

A homoerotic wrestler I’d wrestle in any weather:
BG East’s Mitch Colby
Then again, the right body, perhaps lubricated with some tanning oil, could probably lure me out of my bitchy, whiny buzzkill. I hope you don’t judge me too harshly for this vulnerable confession. However, if you do, wait till September and I’m back in a more familiar climate, and I’ll kick your ass and make you enjoy every second of it.