Bard: Thanks for making time to chat with me today, Morgan. You seem like a busy guy. I’m seeing you in a lot of wrestling products!
Morgan: Yeah, been a busy a few weeks orienting new talent filming seasons 5 and 6 at MDW, as well as work on a superhero season, and of course I have spent a fair amountof time down at BGE.
Bard: You all are already producing season 6!? Season 5 just came out! Damn, you are busy! I’ve been seriously enjoying some of that new talent MDW has been getting their hands on lately. Tidus, Rodriguez, beefy boys in need of getting a beatdown. What do you do to “orient” fresh meat?
Morgan: Glad you like the new boys. These guys did not need much of a training session; they got in the ring ready to wrestle! Rodriguez in particular is going to be a damn fine talent. When a new guy comes in, though, the procedure is to have them spend time watching myself or Muscle Master Kevin wrestle a couple of matches so there are noquestions as to what is off limits. [laughing] All reservations quickly fly out the window using this method. Once they feel comfortable in that regard we set ’em loose.
Bard: Voyeur first, then climb in and go at it? I like it. I like it a lot. I want to ask you more about other wrestlers and about the companies you’ve wrestled for, but first let me ask more about Morgan the Mastodon Cruise. It seems to me like you’ve gone from a rookie to a seasoned heel in the blink of an eye. To what do you owe your success as a terrifying force ofdestruction in the homoerotic wrestling universe?
Morgan: I take full credit for in my in ring prowess! [laughing] But in all seriousness, I have been a wrestling fan for as long as I can remember, and when I got to BG East for the first time it was like a dream. I learned a lot from my first match with Lon Dumont – it was kind of like, “Oh, this is what I am going to be doing? Hell, yeah!”
Bard: That was a monumental match with Lon. I’m a huge, huge, huge fan of his, and I go back to that match often. I had a strong feeling even then that with a little “orienting” from an indy pro veteran like Lon, you were going to be a force to be reckoned with. What would you say is the most devastating hold in your arsenal at this point in your career?
Morgan: Interesting, well that match was all about the bearhug; I bearhugged Lon; he bearhugged me; and I definitely have to put that one high up on the list. But as far as my most devastating hold, the torture rack has to take the cake
Bard: Fuck. Yes. Hoist an opponent up across those big broad shoulders of yours and make them scream. I’ll be in the front row every time. I know what a move like that does for me as I watch you completely dominate a sorry bastard totally off his feet and under your control. What’s the experience like for you?
Morgan: I am always surprised at how easy it is to throw an opponent up there and secure them by their neck and balls. Once they are on my shoulders and I am cranking down, they have no choice but to submit. It is the perfect chance to run my mouth, make them say whatever I want. It is complete control.
Bard: Complete control. That’s what it looks like on this end, too. I hope you don’t mind if I ask about your body, because I’d swear it’s straight out of some of my fondest erotic fantasies from watching old school 1980’s pro wrestling on television. Big, solid muscles, unapologetically hairy, liberally dowsed in sweat, built for function. How would you describe your physique?
Morgan: I am THE hairy he-man. When my opponent comes to the ring and sees me standing across from them, they know what’s going down. My chest is the kryptonite of all men. When I wrestle, I sweat all over guys – always was a heavy perspirer. My bi’s are built tall and peaked; my back is the thickest out of any other wrestler; and I am secretly extremely athletic. Obviously you are not going to see me doing any dop-kicks or high flying moves, much too methodical for that, but letting everyone know now that I can bust any move out. I was built to wrestle.
Bard: Built to wrestle. Excellent summary, and I can’t agree more. So tell me some numbers, because I get off on numbers. What’s your height and weight right now?
Morgan: I’m 5’8, 175 pounds – had been dealing with a shoulder injury and was forced to lean out for quite some time, but now finally am back to my usual bulky self and packing on more muscle than ever.
Bard: How big are those mountainous peaks you call your upper arms?
Morgan: Last I measured, they were in the realm of 18.
Bard: Sweet. How far does the tape measure have to go to get around your pecs and that thickest-of-all-upper-backs?
Morgan: [Laughing] Have not taken that measurement, but let me just say I have ripped a few shirts on the way on and off.
Bard: Damn, you need to get Kevin to grab that measurement… and send me a photo of him doing it. Waist?
Morgan: [Laughing] Good luck getting that photo. The boss is a busy man. My waist is 28 inches.
Bard: Thighs (including copious hair)?
Morgan: Measuring now…
Bard: Damn, I wish I were there to lend a hand with that….
Morgan: You are not the first. 26 inches.
Bard: But I promise, I’d be the best. Fantastic. No wonder opponent’s are weeping when you get those tree trunks wrapped around them. So in the “real” world, when guys are hittingon you, ’cause I know guys are hitting on you all the time, what’s the first compliment they’re giving you to start flirting?
Morgan: They try and guess the color of my eyes – first they say grey, then green, sometimes blue, ultimately concluding they are hazel. Either way it has always been my gaze that draws people in that is invariably where they start – then the bicep compliments start.
Bard: I could totally see that, though if you had your shirt unbuttoned, I’d have to make a comment about those hot hairy pecs. Coincidentally, I put “hazel” as my eye color on my driver’s license, just because no one can tell me a better description for my eye color, either. So back to wrestling, I’m of the opinion that you’ve moved the bar wherever you’ve wrestled. For example, at BG East, you’ve done some amazing work blending old school pro wrestling style with incredibly sexy, trunks off eroticism. And at Muscle Domination Wrestling, it seems to me you’ve been on the envelope pushing the explicit, full-frontal homoerotic combat angle. Do you think of yourself as a trailblazer?
Morgan: I ama stickler for wrestling logic. That is where the old school style comes in. If a move in a sequence is out of place it really bothers me. I religiously watch back all my matches to fill in the gaps, always thinking about what I could have done here or there. I own a very raw wrestling style which goes hand in hand with baring skin. My main objective at MDW was to incorporate skillful wrestling within the sub-dom framework. Originally Muscle Domination Wrestling utilized wrestling as a medium to explore different facets of domination. My job is bringing the product to a level where wrestling assumes its natural artful position while MDW expands its vision for alpha male conquest. Season 5 marks the first huge strides towards this goal.
Bard: I’m thrilled to hear about that continuing evolution at MDW. And I like the word “raw” for your wrestling style. It’s raw, hardcore, in your face wrestling without losing an ounce of respect for the art and science of it. And I’m here to confess that watching you pound the shit out of some pretty, pretty boy turns me on… a lot. Is wrestling a turn on for you?
Morgan: Turn on, fulfillment, gratification… all those words are appropriate.
Bard: Nice to know that it works that way on your end. Speaking of you pounding the shit out of pretty boys, name some names for me. Do you have a favorite match so far in your career?
Morgan: Ah, always a tough question, picking my favorite, but to name a couple… One from BGE, one from MDW. I loved wrestling Diego Diaz. He was a really naturally talented guy. We had a great back and forth before I crushed my way to victory. Chemistry is just one of those things – until you are in the ring working off one another you just never know how a match will turn out, but right when we started and he responded to my shit-talk I knew we would have a good scrap. As for MDW, it has given me many chances to wrestle Tony Law. My first filmed match with him was also at BGE, but since then we have faced each other more times than I can count, so we work very well together – no punches pulled, just intense grit. The most recent match we had was a celebration of our “rivalry,” the culmination of our many bouts – Tony’s final chance to get one over on a 60 minute straight-through Iron Man match. We filmed it all in one shot, non-stop action, and boy did it get sweaty – my favorite match from the new season 5 for sure.
Bard: Again, I’m a big fan of big, big, big Diego Diaz, and that chemistry you describe definitely comes through when watching that match. And I’m not surprised to hear Tony Law’s name pop up. By the law of averages, since you’ve beaten him so many times, it makes sense one of those times might be on your favorites list. I’ve seen your match with Tony over at BG East, and again, the word “raw” comes to mind. The match description for this Iron Man match for MDW’s season 5 makes it sound as if Tony may have finally turned the tables on you this time around, which I for one find hard to believe. Anything more you can say about Iron Man and how you left Tony’s meaty ass when the 60 minutes were up?
Morgan: Well, the Iron Man contest allows for multiple pins and submissions (not that any heel is going to stop at the first tap out anyway), so I will say that Tony had a lot of chance to make up for lost time. The man that walks away with the most victories at the hour’s end is declared the ultimate winner of the contest, so either we exchanged a few wins in a closely contested bout, or I kicked his ass for an hour straight, but you will have to watch it to find out.
Bard: Nicely teased. Damien Rush is another hot stud you’ve brutalized over and over from MDW to BG East and back again. The level of brutality and humiliation you’ve dragged him through is an astonishing body of work all on it’s own. I’ve got to hand it to the handsome hunk that he’s got some serious nerve climbing back into the ring again and again with you. You look like you could just about eat him for lunch, but I wonder if, at the end of the day, you walk away with respect for even the mewling, weeping opponents you leave crushed in the ring behind you, like hot hunk Damien.
Morgan: Damien is a hot-headed talent, and I do respect him, but at the end of the day I have job to do and that is putting everyone in their proper place beneath me the one true wrestling god. Now, if Mr. Rush wanted to admit that I am and always will be better than him in every way and wanted to form a tag team with me then I could really respect him.
Bard: Message sounds loud and clear to me. By the way, if you find yourself ripping Mr. Rush’s sweat-soaked trunks off his hot bod again, keep me in mind. I’ve got a trophy case with a spot reserved. Your most recent release for BG East featured you taking on both Christian Taylor and his notorious jobber boyfriend, Skip Vance at the same time in Tag Team Torture 16. I’ve only seen previews of the match so far, but it looks like you fucking own the both of them in body and soul. A boyfriend tag team beatdown is a long-standing pet erotic fantasy of mine. What was it like for you to not just work over another pretty boy like Christian, but to crush him in front of his anguished lover and then humiliate the both of them at the same time?
Morgan: Let me first say if you want Damien’s trunks you will have to peel them off his throat, but it is fine by me. Someone needs to do him the favor after my many mean encounters with him. Boyfriend Beatdown was exhilarating. While I owned Christian in the ring, Skip cheers on moral support from the much safer exterior of the ring. For the first time I was able to bash one hunk while taunting another. My game plan was of course to get both in the ring at once because obviously alone they are both squash material. Skip and I went back and forth for a good while before I got underneath his skin playing with his boyfriend in whichever way I wanted. Christian was no match for me and failed to save any face even with his boyfriend there cheering him on. I felt badly for him so it was only natural to provoke skip so his boyfriend could see that no one stands a chance against the Mastodon. Squashing both together was like playing god I was the ruler of their relationship; I was the master of all things private to them, it was Morgan Cruise who determined when and where they kissed along with other things.
Bard: Holy shit, that’s hot. That match is officially next on my BG East order form. So here are a few stream of consciousness questions for you. Don’t think too long… just answer what comes first into your head. Okay?
Morgan: Sure.
Bard: Steak or seafood?
Morgan: Seafood.
Bard: Boxers or briefs?
Morgan: Neither.
Bard: [Laughing] Perfect. Legs or chest?
Morgan: Chest.
Bard: Scissor or bearhug?
Morgan: Bearhug.
Bard: Top or bottom?
Morgan: Top.
Bard: Of course. Country or rock?
Morgan: Metal.
Bard: Nice. So you’ve got a lot of fans, I’m sure you know. Watching you in the ring, however, you seem completely focused, like you don’t give a shit about anyone else, what anyone else thinks or wants. What do you make of the legions of Mastodon fans out there who can’t get enough of the magic that you make in the wrestling ring?
Morgan: The truth is that my namesake the Mastodon went extinct, but I am the perfect breed – an ever-evolving specimen, and that means listening to feedback and taking direction and criticism. I keep in close contact with my die hard fans, and they tell me what they like and what they do not. Luckily there is very little to not like. When I am in the ring I tap into the primal force that is the Mastodon, and everything else dissolves. My focus becomes how I want to break my opponent down and how to do it with precise logic and incomparable style.
Bard: Good to hear. You are a crowd pleaser, it’s impossible to deny. What’s something that Mastodon fans don’t know about you that they should?
Morgan: I am very quiet outside the ring. [Laughing] I hardly speak. I meticulously dissect the way in which others communicate so that I never misunderstand anyone. Everyone has a different method or nuance to the way in whcih they articulate the idea they want to get across, so attention to detail is key. As a result, I do not own a cell phone. I heavily prefer direct contact
Bard: Fascinating… and suddenly I’m second guessing what I’ve said this whole interview. Just a couple more questions for you. Is there any particular wrestler currently competing that you haven’t wrestled yet that needs to trampled by the Mastodon?
Morgan: Kid Karisma.
Bard: Holy hell, yes! I’d pay for a front row seat for that one! Hell, the image of all of those muscles locked with muscles is making me a little dizzy right now. Speaking of muscles, if you found yourself climbing into the ring again with Lon Dumont, with considerably more experience and practice under your belt now than when you first wrestled, do you think things would turn out differently this time around?
Morgan: I have been waiting for that question. He can come to MDW, or we can meet back up in the BG East ring any time, any place. I am there. This time around, you can bet your “firstborn,” The Mastodon is walking away victorious.
Bard: Sweet. I’m hoping to sit down for face-to-face interview with Mr. Muscles in the not-too-distant future, so I’ll be sure to let him know. You’ve been a delight to chat with, Morgan, and for someone who typically hardly speaks outside the ring, you’ve been an awesome conversationalist. Is there any last word you’d like to pass along to Mastodon fans out there before I let you go?
Morgan: The Mastodon is watching over the works at MDW, and would like to encourage my fans to check Muscle Domination Wrestling out as I am making sure my in-ring work extends beyond my own matches. The landscape has changed, and the wrestling has come to the forefront. And thank you for the interview it was a pleasure to have this experience. I have learned a good few things from your blog. And do be sure to let good old Lonny Dumont that he can come to me, or I am coming for him [laughing].
Bard: You are a one of a kind, hot, sweaty, raw, old school mass of muscle wrestler, and I cannot wait to catch up on your newest releases now, and to check out the evolving landscape at MDW. I hope we can chat again sometime, perhaps after I can get Lon back on the record. Thanks again, Morgan. You’re awesome!
Sidelineland 