Tuesday Trunk Pulls

Am I the only one around here whose blood pumps a little faster when a wrestler yanks on his opponent’s trunks?  No, of course I’m not.  I bet I’m not even the only one who’s poured over stills of trunk pulling to catch a glimpse of what’s hidden on some of the demure hunks of homoerotic wrestling who otherwise have not (yet) put their junk on display in the ring. So here are some Tuesday Trunk Pulls to give you a little leverage on your work week.

mikey
Hottest trunk pull ever? Possibly. Hunky rookie (years later, now Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month) Brad Rochelle is firmly in the control of vicious heel Mikey Vee in BG East’s Fantasymen 17.
aryx
Aryx Quinn generously gives us just a glimpse of the monster (and his collar) that lurks beneath the trunks of Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) in BG East’s Ring Hunks 1.
cole
Before I’d seen Mitch’s full monty, Cole Cassidy’s trunk pull had me apoplectic to see more and more of the gorgeous stud’s topography in BG East’s Ring Wars 15.
jonny
Jonny Firestorm demonstrates the mastery and beauty of a trunk pull from behind, showing off Austin Raine’s naked ass in BG East’s Wrestlefest 3.
dark
Hunky, hairy, dangerous Dark Rogers appears awed by what he unwraps after destroying Jason Ward for stakes in BG East’s Private Bouts 117-120.
dante
Come full circle, Dante Rosetti treats Mikey Vee’s insanely gorgeous, muscled ass to a humiliating trunk pull in BG East’s Fantasymen 14.

What are your favorite trunk pulls?

Wednesday’s Woes

I’m entirely on board with the erotic power of a tree of woe. The ToW is an example of how some homoerotic wrestling gems simply require a professional wrestling ring.  Hang a hammered hunk upside down in the corner, his knees draped over the top ropes and his feet locked in place beneath the cable connecting the turnbuckle to the post, and there’s all sorts of a hot wrestling gold that’s suddenly ripe for picking. It’s a maneuver that signals total control over a mastered man. The subject of woe is laid out so vulnerably, his body not just on display, but trussed up beautifully for easy access to innovative methods of torture.  There’s a little crossover here between bondage kink and wrestling kink, with enough of both to show due respect to all parties involved, as far as I’m concerned.  In honor of those of you who harbor a special place in your hearts and crotches for an agonizing, dominating, body manipulating tree of woe (and I hear from you often), this post is for you.  Here are 10 ideas for what to do with an opponent once you’ve trapped him in a tree of woe.

jpwoe
Climb on top, knee crushing his balls, and celebrate like Brooklyn Bodywrecker.
coltonwoe
When finding yourself out-boxed, hang the fucker upside down and peel off his gloves to make this all about homoerotic wrestling, like Brodie Fisher.
diegowoe
Grab a dumbbell and bash your opponent’s six-pack abs, like Eli Black.
bobbywoe
Duck outside the ring and wrench the trapped fucker’s head backward, like Cameron Matthews.
lonwoe
Stop on his flowing locks and dare the muscleboy to squirm, like Ethan Andrews.
kylewoe
Stand outside the ring and threaten to rip his arms out at the shoulder, like Alex Waters.
austinwoe
Make sure his trunks are hooked on the turnbuckle and slipping off, then land a soaring drop kick to the helpless stud’s gut, like Jonny Firestorm.
shanewoe
Sit on his face, like the Brooklyn Bodywrecker.
jonnywoe
Pause and appreciate the view – and feel – like Jarret Cole.
kevinwoe
That’s right, a Tree of Woe/Bearhug/Headscissors combination, nice and snug in the crushing embrace of Cole Cassidy!

Bodies Over Time – Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month Edition

Reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month: Christian Taylor
(aka Chris Cox)
Christian Taylor rocks. He’s stunning in still frame. Long, perpetually lean, gorgeously handsome square jaw, aquiline nose, piercing, long-lashed eyes, and a big, toothy, melting smile. I haven’t chatted with him in real time (though I’d love to!), but the hit I get off of his wrestling matches and his available photo sets is that he’s doesn’t quite believe just how sexy he is. A 6’2″, 175 lbs athlete with cover boy good looks who harbors some insecurity about his own attractiveness is one of the sexiest things on earth, I think.
Christian over time: (l) Undagear 15, (c) Sexy Showdown 6, and (r) Wet and Wild 6
This is a “bodies over time” post officially, but honestly, over the course of about 7 years appearing in homoerotic wrestling, his body has remained astonishingly hot. If anything, he’s getting more ripped, more handsome, and more confident with age. His pecs are a little fuller. He’s whittled his abs and obliques down to first-rate washboard condition. He looks like he’s lived into the long, sultry lines of his genetically blessed physique with more and more grace as he’s shown up over and over to put that beautiful body on the line in homoerotic wrestling.
Max Powers stretches out Chris’ hot, long body and highlights that bulging package
Christian earned his title as reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month on the strength of his ring match (wrestling as “Chris Cox“) against muscle bully Max Powers for Rock Hard Wrestling. As powerful and stimulating a sight as Max’s muscled body is, it’s Christian’s wrestling, suffering, and bulging package that make this straight-up wrestling match so freakin’ homoerotically hot!
(l) Christian Taylor and (r) Sean Patrick
As far as I can tell, Christian made his homoerotic wrestling debut, and has appeared most, wrestling for BG East. BG East has also featured some of his sexiest and most overtly homoerotic work, which is clearly a strong suit of BG East. Particularly in the physical shape Christian has been in for his most recent wrestling products, I can’t help but think of him as a new edition of classic BG East tall, cool drink of water, Sean Patrick. According to their published stats, Christian is just about an inch taller and a little heavier than Sean, but they’re both built similarly. I’d expect to see the looks of Christian on the cover of a magazine sooner than I’d expect to see (albeit handsome) Sean, but they have similar genetics.  And both of these lovely lean wrestlers have/had a similar not-so-secret weapon in their matches: opponents seem to melt when either of these handsome hotties lock their lips on them.
Austin Raines welcomes Christian to the world of
homoerotic wrestling in BG East’s Undagear 13

The wrestling “lip lock” is a move that I relish in homoerotic wrestling. I know that not everyone is with me on this, but unconditionally, when hard, hot, sweaty wrestling morphs into aggressive kissing and passionate groping, it sends my kink firing on all cylinders! And reviewing Christian’s resume (at BG East) makes it quite obvious that one opponent after another has tasted his lovely lips sooner or later in match after match.

Christian sucks the fight out of Blaine Janus in Undagear 15

Like Sean Patrick, when Christian’s mouth makes contact with an opponent, it seems to sap the battle right out of them. Who can stay focused on a fight when a hunk like Christian distracts you with a lingering lip lock? On top, on the bottom, in the heat of battle or as post-match foreplay, the beauty of battlers aroused by their wrestling and sucking face hot and heavy is an essential analogy to what turns me on at my core.

In Wrestleshack 12, Tim Sheridan seems unconcerned about being
put to his back once Christian starts to toy with his nipples and kiss him.

Of course, if it were just making out, I’d be entertained, but it wouldn’t exactly feed my kink. I enjoy seeing guys with their tongues down each other’s throats, but what arouses me most powerfully is watching hunks face off, throw down, crush and slam one another, and within that context, wrestlers driven to distraction by their own lustful lips tasting one another makes my ears whistle with the dramatic redistribution of blood flow in my body.

Christian neutralizes Tim’s bearhug in an instant

Christian’s wrestling gives me the impression that he “gets it” intuitively. I’m certain that there are plenty of wrestlers who punch the clock in homoerotic wrestling, earning the cash but not owning the kink.  That isn’t a problem, in and of itself, for me. As long as they can sell what I’m buying, my imagination and discerning eye can take from homoerotic wrestling all that I need, whether or not the antagonists walk away owning it for themselves. But Christian is one of the hotties that sells so well, either from the inside out or outside in, that I can’t help but think that he’s in “our” camp both on screen and off.

Kid Karisma conquers Christian, knocks him out cold, and then can’t resist
employing some mouth-to-mouth “resuscitation” 

And as someone I like to think of as “one of us,” what a delight it is to identify with Christian for all of the crazy, enviable positions he’s had the opportunity to find himself in on the mat and in the ring.

In Wet & Wild 5, Kid K buries Christian’s face
in his crotch long and hard.

Getting called out and absolutely owned by the likes of my reigning undisputed favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma, is enviable enough. But the sight of Christian’s face shoved in Kid’s K’s crotch, squeezed between the charismatic one’s pumped, muscled thighs, and then lip-locked in post-match foreplay is like jolts of electricity shooting through my body (the good kind).  And then, as Kid K lets his opponent lean his half-a-foot taller frame on him as they head into the sunroom, Christian stretches his mile long arm and platter-sized hand down and squeezes that epic muscle ass of Kid K’s! Holy shit! I’m so envious that I could start to hate my homoerotic wrestler of the month just a little.

Christian makes drop-dead gorgeous fantasyman Alexi Adamov
scream like his bitch in “Who’s Next?”

And what’s not to be insanely jealous of when you see Christian straddling sexy Alexi Adamov’s tanned, toned muscle body, nearly ripping the Russian’s shoulders out of their sockets, and sitting back on Alexi’s bodacious bubble butt to listen to the babyface scream!?  So he didn’t get a liplock on the Russian, but hot damn, a fellow wrestling kinkster putting it all on the line in the BG East backyard against the likes of pristine prettyboy fantasyman Alexi makes me absolutely ache with lust!

Jake Jenkins makes every inch of Christian suffer in
Wet & Wild 6
And it’s no wonder Christian keeps hanging out by the pool, when the likes of Kid Karisma and then Jake Jenkins show up for a wet and wild bully showdown!  Then contrast of sizes and body types between Christian and Jake makes my jaw drop. Jake’s 5’7″ muscle packed mat body tying up and twisting the infinitely long, graceful, powerful lines of Christian’s 6’2″ physique is a visual masterpiece. Someone like Christian with a proven track record of getting off on the eroticism of wrestling, paired with the intensely sincere amateur-come-pro likes of straight-up dominator Jake, is guaranteed to transport me from this side of the screen onto that very match, feeling it ache every ounce as much as Christian suffers.

Christian and real-life lover Skip are passionately merciless with one another
in Sexy Showdown 6

And damn, what could be hotter than to get paired with your very own real life lover, showing up in the BG East mat room to wrestle in a product that’s destined to be entitled “Sexy Showdown 6?” The torque that these two work up on each other’s joints, the humiliating domination that they exchange, paired with a genuine romance and physical lust for one another that spills over off the mat is like a homoerotic wrestling kinkster’s anthem. Taking Skip Vance, making him hurt, taking some punishment from him and then squeezing out a final fall, once-and-for-all (until they get home) victory over the man he’ll wake up in the morning next to in bed is fucking awesome!

And an adorably sweet smile!? My homoerotic wrestler of the month
has it ALL going on!

I’m entirely ready to admit that I could be completely wrong about the backstory that I’ve convinced myself to fill in for hot hunk Christian Taylor (aka Chris Cox). He could totally be punching the clock. He could be an asshole narcissist with an ego that can barely squeeze it’s way into the BG East matroom. He could be a body facist, condescending, frigid bastard who knows precisely the worth of his every asset and how to exploit a homoerotic wrestling audience like a maestro waving a baton. But I don’t think so. And more importantly, I don’t believe so. Because Christian has sold me, lock, stock and barrel, on a fully formed, deeply arousing, fantastically entertaining through-story, and whatever he gets up to off camera, when he’s on camera I’m entranced and fully engaged.  So it’s no wonder at all that he’s joined the ranks of those who’ve so completely captured and controlled my lusts on their way to earning the title of homoerotic wrestler of the month.
Mike Martin is instantly under Christian’s spell in
incredibly sexy Undagear 18 

Nicely played, Christian. Nicely played.

Delightful Conundrum

BG East’s Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you) remains a conundrum to me. On the one hand, he’s a heartless tease. His wrestling career is all about his mammoth package (at least as far as I’m concerned, that’s what it’s about), but despite being all about genitals, we’ve only barely glimpsed his bare essentials unleashed. His gear, his balls-in-face victory poses, his frequent mid-match hand down his trunks to rearrange the goods… he’s practically screaming, “Marvel at my gargantuan balls!” And yet he coyly, demurely (well, sort of) seems to have a non-nudity clause in his contract. This should make me hate him with a bitter resentment I reserve for few.
On the other hand, when I think of the line dividing straight-up wrestling from homoerotic fare, I can’t imagine thinking of Mr. Joshua as anything but flag-firmly-planted well on the homoerotic side. I’m the first (though I’m sure not the last) to point out that my opinions here may reveal me to be inconsistent, fickle, and potentially even hypocritical. None of those things really bother me so much. But on the topic of grab-ass in homoerotic wrestling, which I’ve been musing about lately, for all Mr. Joshua’s carefully covered assets, he frequently takes matters firmly in hand.
Perhaps not so frequently is the literal grab-ass in a Mr. Joshua bash, but particularly in his more recent appearances, someone’s balls are almost always getting grabbed. When Mr Joshua shoves his own mitt down the front of his trunks, honestly, I cheer (outloud… really). His fascination with his own balls is delightful to watch. It’s as if he just can’t keep from grabbing and tugging at himself (and honestly, haven’t we all been there?). But what connects the dots for me is that Mr. Joshua clearly has an irresistible need to grab hold precisely at the moment that he’s laid an opponent out commandingly. Something has shifted in his trunks simultaneous with his moment of humiliating domination over the punk who had the temerity to step into the ring/on the mat with the power and guile of Mr. Joshua. Even if he doesn’t whip it out and pop off on camera, he at least sells the story that he’s aroused by the act of hammering a barely clothed man down and climbing on top.
I’ve been particularly pleased with the development of his story to include the fact that his opponents can’t help but notice Mr. Joshua’s package and his own fascination with it. They frequently mock him with a crotch-to-face pin (which is an obligatory element in any Mr. Joshua victory), and shove their hand down their own trunks. Nearly no one has the package to compete with Mr. Joshua, though, so even on the bottom, his massive balls somehow manage to come out on top.
Early in his career, the focus on Mr. Joshua’s package was more implied. It was context in which the wrestling took place, as far as I can tell. But lately, both Mr. Joshua and his opponent’s have been taking matters more directly in hand. One of the sweetest Mr. Joshua matches, I think, was the summer’s release of the man himself going up against a much smaller Austin Raines. Mr. Joshua grabs hold of Austin’s throat and balls early and hard, and he gets it back in spades. Austin’s choke and throttle on Mr. Joshua comes in a very close second place to the “teabagging” moment as my very favorite moment in this match.

Perhaps Mr. Joshua’s career left turn can be dated to his utter humiliation in the right hand of Brooklyn Bodywrecker in Mr. Joshua’s own Wrestler Spotlight DVD. It was this match that made me finally tear my eyes away from his package to admire the hard, powerful ass on Mr. Joshua. It was also the match that came closest to consummating the love affair that Mr. Joshua’s crotch has been nursing with the camera, including Mr. Joshua stripped naked and tossed over BBW’s shoulder. As I’ve complained bitterly about prior, though, don’t get your hopes up here. You’ll get a tasty, lingering look at Mr. Joshua’s bare and vulnerable cheeks, but BBW taunts us by refusing to show us the real moneymaker.

The hits and, more delightfully, the squeezes just keep coming in match after match. Giving

…and taking, the main character in any Mr. Joshua match has got be acknowledged to be the crotch, and sooner or later it’s Mr. Joshua’s crotch that steals the spotlight, crowding everyone else off the stage.

So, while it’s true he unfortunately does not qualify to compete in my pornboy division, as a non-pornboy Mr. Joshua’s wrestling is still all about sex and the wonders that a hard, hot body like his can’t help but bring to mind. On a purely abstract level, I completely respect his decision to just barely/not quite keep his modesty in tact. Much more viscerally, though, I remain locked in a love/hate conundrum when I think about Mr. Joshua… and I frequently do.

He’s come such a long way since he debuted against the emerging legend of chisel-chinned Brad Rochelle as a musclehead with perhaps more brawn than brains underneath his frosted locks. A legend in his own right, as far as I’m concerned, looking back at Mr. Joshua’s debut makes me marvel. Who could predict what hot, productive homoerotic wrestling careers would be represented on the mat that day?

With wisdom born of experience and, I’d argue, an even hotter body today, Mr. Joshua makes me often possessed with the desire to trade places with any single opponent who’s had the privilege of experiencing a Mr. Joshua beatdown. Though, if I found myself in the enviable position of just a handful of those opponents (with Mr. Joshua’s balls resting on my lips), I almost certainly would be unable to honor his contract rider.

Double-billing


BG East has viciously exploited my well-known weakness. Having no impulse control whatsoever, I was sucked in to both order the new release
Demolition 14 AND buy a 24 hour rental of Mr. Joshua’s match against Austin Raines. The deliciously detailed description of the match on their website leaves me helpless to restrain myself. I’m paying twice for the same match. Those evil, evil marketing geniuses.

Run, do not walk, to order this product. This is firing on all cylinders. Austin Raines takes a fantastic quantity of punishment and humiliation, with Mr. Joshua teaching him the 5 rules of wrestling demolition. Personally, I think Mr. Joshua skimped on rule #5. Sure, as he says, his 18 inch arms, 32 and a half inch waist, and 46 inch chest are entirely deserving of adoration. But it’s those 8 unspecified inches that he mentions and the bowling balls beneath them that are surely Mr. Joshua’s best assets.
So while continuing to mercilessly tease us with a story line centered on Mr. Joshua’s crotch, this definitely takes things much farther along in my personal fantasies of what I’m dying to see out of a Mr. Joshua match. Sitting on Austin’s face and plopping his package down across Austin’s mouth, Mr. Joshua asks rhetorically if the rookie is familiar with teabagging.
Those teabags could steep several gallons of sun tea, Mr. Joshua. Despite kicking myself for being so easily manipulated into my double purchase, I defiantly say that it was worth it. I am seriously happy with what I’ve seen. Once I get a gander at Lon Dumont decimating a baby face, I’m confident this DVD will be at the front of my cue for a long time to come.

Next to Appear on My Credit Card Statement


Last week
I mentioned (not for the first time) my love-hate relationship with Mr. Joshua Goodman’s crotch. Just to taunt and tease me viciously, in the last BG East Arena update, there are preview pics of the upcoming match with Mr. Joshua’s crotch (and the rest of him).

It looks like Mr. Joshua will square off against erotic never-say-die twinkboy on the rise, Austin Raines. The product is another in the Demolition series, and from the preview pics, I’m not entirely sure who gets demolished. Both boys look like they get some licks in (metaphorically speaking). And there are several, lingering shots of Mr. Joshua with his hand shoved down the front of his trunks, making my eyes water just a bit (as always).
This looks like it may be a step up the homoerotic scale a bit, though. It looks like both Austin and Mr. Joshua treat one another to some painful ball claws (and that’s got to be quite a handful for Austin to handle!). Perhaps even more enticing, it looks like Mr. Joshua may finally be seriously rubbing his opponent’s face in it. Where do I get in line for that ride?
Match 3 on the same DVD looks like it features Lon Dumont destroying a baby-baby-baby face. KL made my day over at the yahoo group for BGE Headquarters, letting us know that this product is available for sale even prior to the new catalog release. I can already hear the shuffle of dollar bills escaping my wallet…

…In Love and War

There are plenty of products out there showing gorgeous men in skimpy trunks grappling, dominating and submitting. Sometimes, though, I want a little more of the “homoerotic” in my homoerotic wrestling. Of course the dick slap across the face, or the post-match blow job or fuck gets to the point. But a little more subtle, and often much more erotic, is the wrestling kiss. When they pull out the liplock, suddenly I’m not trying to guess if these guys are actually gay or just toying with us. When one man’s tongue is shoved down another man’s throat, I don’t really care anymore.
I’m not referring to the post-victory seal of ownership, though that’s nice as well. But the aggressive or defensive kiss in the middle of a match is a really delicious plot twist. In the middle of Patrick Donovan’s domination of Brandon Aldrich in Mat Brats 1, Brandon employs a defensive liplock that derails the veteran Patrick. Pecboy Patrick returns the favor with a cranking headlock on Brandon, who’s flat on his back with Patrick’s tongue down his throat. Patrick breaks the liplock, explaining that any further reward for Brandon will require him to earn it through abject suffering.

Patrick’s no stranger to kissing as ring-plot. His partner in
Tag Team Torture 1 was the notorious kisser, Sean Patrick (in my mind I always wrote the backstory that these performers were lovers). In humiliation after humiliation suffered at the hands of heels Jose and Cruze, Patrick and Sean find themselves in naked, face-to-face, mirror-image camel clutches, with their lips shoved together in the middle of the ring (I confess I love this so much I wrote it into my fiction, with Adrian Pasdar and Milo Ventimiglia in a helpless liplock in the clutches of Sendhil Ramamurthy and Christopher Meloni). The choreography here is sweet. This isn’t the only time this device is used in BG East, but it’s certainly one of the sweetest. Cruz and Jose also torture the skinny studs in a remarkable naked, stacked, double camel clutch and boston crab that’s got to be seen to be believed.
Though Sean Patrick earned the moniker “The Kisser,” it must be said that Kid Vicious has got to be the master (of many things but in particular) of the aggressive match kiss. KV’s knack for using his wiry body to systematically pick to pieces his hot stud opponent’s is “mind”blowing all in itself. But his sadistic joy in wrapping his prey up in paralyzing positions and slapping a forced liplock on gets my motor running.

An astonishing tag moment near the top of my homoerotic wrestling favorites is the fantastic beatdown that the Brooklyn Bodywrecker and Shane McCall put on Liam Ryan and Brian Powers in Tag Team Torture 2. I think all tag team matches should include the overt storyline of teams of lovers fighting one another. After BBW made Shane is boy in Dark Knights 5, they show up clearly having sorted out their daddy/cub relationship. Liam and Brian similarly let us know that they had each other’s backs well before arriving in the ring. There’s a brief moment of fun when skinny boy Liam puts some ecstatic hurt on leatherboy BBW, but inevitably the heels slam the shit out of the Liam and Brian. Ultimately, Brian’s taped into one corner, and after having Liam’s face shoved in his partner’s crotch from every angle, the heels torture the skinny Irishman in the center of the ring. Near the final moment of victory, BBW gives his cub a treat by pinning Liam’s face against Shane’s crotch while the two heels enjoy some convincing making out. On paper, this may all sound like it runs thin, but I buy this from start to finish.

Sometimes my kink is just seeing guys beating the crap out of one another. Sometimes I’m really looking for some humiliation. But serve me up some genuine liplocks as aggression (or defense) in the wrestling ring, and I’m sold.