Telling Stories

Regular readers know my tastes.  I’m not coy about being being particularly turned on by action in a wrestling ring, guys with tattoos, muscular asses, shaved heads, hair pulling, erotic tag teams, over-the-knee backbreakers, trapped in the ropes muscle torture, ego-bashing trash talk, overcoming long odds, and story telling (just to name a few of my favorite things).  If I absolutely had to give up all but one of those things, I think I’d have to hang out to the bitter end for my lustful desire for a well-told story.  I’m a drama/melodrama junkie, and wedded with homoerotic wrestling, a compelling story with 3 dimensional characters, a story arc, a climax and a sexually dominating denouement is powerfully satisfying for me.  Thus my delight in homoerotic wrestling fiction (writing it, but especially reading that of others).   I’ve also lately been particularly titillated to learn that some of the juiciest morsels from the pages of this blog and my fondest homoerotic wrestling matches have also begun blogging.

Monaco on the mats.

Ben Monaco is the latest wrestler that I know of who’s started documenting his journey into on camera homoerotic wrestling with his blog, Monaco Off the Mats.  His first post is text-intensive, meaning I’m already powerfully aroused, as Ben describes this new chapter in his life in which a chance encounter on Grindr led inevitably down the path toward Ben’s metamorphosis into a rising star in the homoerotic wrestling business.

Most recently, Ben got his hands (and tongue) all over massive rookie Alain LeClair in Mat Scraps 2.

Check out Ben’s story and encourage him to keep up the narrative, because I’m going to blow an artery if I don’t get to read subsequent chapters of his journey.  He’s also offered to answer questions, and I know I for one have been cataloging new ones to ask ever since he granted me an interview soon after his debut for BG East.  I find that blogging is work, my friends, and a healthy dose of positive reinforcement is essential to enduring lapses in motivation to keep going, so get on Monaco Off the Mats and tell Ben you want to know what happens next!

That Ginger Guy!

My recently slapped down top contender and long-time title holder of my favorite homoerotic wrestler (and BG East’s 2012 winner for Best Butt) Kid Karisma, has a blog that he updates irregularly, but delightfully when he does.  That Ginger Guy! (perfectly named, to match his physical perfection), hasn’t been updated in a few months, sadly.  Personally, I’m dying to know if he lost the ginger whiskers once No Shave November was over (’cause I’m saying right now I’d like to see those full blown whiskers in the ring!).  And who’s with me in harboring a crazy lust to watch the karismatic one crush objects between those rugby-built quads?  And I’m still hoping to see some incriminating post-party, slack jawed, drooling evidence of what homoerotic wrestling’s most infamous party boy looks like in the back seat on the way home.  We know that Kid K will dish, god bless him, and I can’t think of a better theme for That Ginger Guy! than a much needed gossip rag for the homoerotic wrestling industry.  Pass the word along and let’s get Kid K back at the keyboard.

Cameron Mathews sells the goods.

Cameron Mathews launched his personal/professional wrestling website last summer, and he’s done a decent job of keeping the material fresh and liberally laced with beefcake.  He tends to be a man of relatively few words, but they’re typically well-chosen and paired with some sweet video and stills, CameronWrestler.com offers some inspiring insights into the hardest working homoerotic wrestler on the scene.  He’s also periodically selling Cameron-memorabilia for his army of fans to purchase, like his current sale on liberally sweat-stained trunks (it’s never too early to start Christmas shopping for Bard, friends).  Most provocatively, I think, is Cam’s offer to tape custom wrestling matches, and there are a boatload of testimonials bearing evidence that his Pro vs. Joe private bookings leave his fans supremely satisfied.

What naughty thoughts is Aryx thinking now?

My most recent interviewee, Aryx Quinn, has more of Twitter presence than anything else on the internet, but he does have a website that’s been promising a new, expanded source for all things Aryx for quite a while.  I hope that those of you populating the Twittersphere will start bombarding @TristanBaldwin with pleas for more Aryx Quinn wrestling access.

Drake Marcos knows drama.

For months I’ve been encouraging ambitious rookie Drake Marcos to start blogging about his journey into the hearts and lusts of homoerotic wrestling fans (and a particular homoerotic wrestling producer who’s clearly taken a shine to the eager baby face beauty).  Drake keeps promising me it’s on his to-do list.

Talk about a story to tell!

And then there are plenty more homoerotic wrestlers I think ought to blog.  I know for a fact Kid Leopard is online at least 25 hours out of every day.  Can you imagine some free association narrative from the man who’s gone from down and dirty heel to heading his own international wrestling empire?!

Tease no more, Kid Vicious!

And please, people, if you know Kid Vicious, tell him he’s GOT TO either give me that interview he’s been teasing me with for (I kid you not) at least 8 months, or launch a Kid Vicious blog to let us get a glimpse of the dark recesses of his fantastically homoerotically kinked wrestling mind.

Do you need a kidney, Lon!?

I’d sell a kidney for more access to Lon Dumont, as well.  Pro wrestler turned competitive bodybuilder turned homoerotic wrestler!?  That’s worth a made for TV movie at the barest minimum, and much more obviously deserves some custom-made Lon served up for some voracious fans (line starts directly behind ME!).

Clearly Brad Rochelle knows his way around a keyboard.

Yes, I love a story told well.  And I’m sure that there are other wrestlers we could think of that we’d like to hear much, much more from.  Then again, I’m sure not every homoerotic wrestler fancies clicking away at a keyboard, but I’m equally certain (and I have documentation to prove it) that there are more than a few wrestling fantasymen adept and accomplished in crafting the English language into compelling and erotically satisfying narrative.  I’m typically a half a decade behind the times, but I’m hoping against hope that more web presence and online drama is where the hot world of homoerotic wrestling is heading!

Best of…

The best of BG East in 2012 poll results have been posted.  Joe’s also posted a summary of the winners,  implying that he and the popular vote may have parted ways at several points.  Same for me, I think.  Honestly, I can’t remember who I voted for in several categories, despite the fact that I voted just a few days ago.  It’s probably the remnants of my anti-inflammatory and pain meds working their way out of my system.

Sexiest  Match: StripStakes 3 – Morgan Cruise vs Damien Rush
I do like numbers though, and I’m happy to see a few more data points available than just who won. For example, Morgan Cruise’s rip ‘n strip ‘n force to cum rookie welcome of Damien Rush in StripStakes 3 scored the trophy for sexiest match in 2012, but check the stats.  The match I voted for, Cage Thunder and Lightning Rod’s insanely sexy 2-on-1 destruction of achingly adorably Stinger in Masked Mayhem 9 was just 1 percentage point behind.  I think the heat of this competition deserves seeing Cage Thunder and Lightning Rod tag team once again, this time against Morgan and Damien!
Best Mat Battle: Matie Rookies Eli Black v Jake Jenkins

I was with the herd in selecting best mat battle.  Jake Jenkins and Eli Black’s Mat Rookie confrontation is a match I think will stand the test of time.  And it was 20 percentage points ahead of 2nd place!  When we do a best of the best vote for the next decade anniversary or 100th catalog of BGE, I think Jake and Eli could contend for the title against a broader field.

Best Ring Match: Babyface Brawls 2 Austin Cooper v Cameron Matthews
I can’t remember for certain, but I think my vote for best ring match went with runner-ups Jonny Firestorm and Jake Jenkins in Jobberpalooza 12: The Works, rather than category winners Cameron Matthews and Austin Cooper for Babyface Brawl 2.  I wouldn’t argue with that outcome at all, really, even though just 5 percentage points separated 1st and 2nd place.  I thought that was a very competitive category with several very worthy contenders.

Top Babyface: Jake Jenkins
For best babyface, I think I again went with the herd in picking winner Jake Jenkins who pulled it out by 6 percentage points over Austin Cooper.  There are extremely fierce fans in both of these boys’ camps, so I’m not surprised they rose to the top.  I’m sort of pleased that of the two, Jake topped Coop.

Top Heel: Jonny Firestorm

Honestly, I just can’t remember who I voted for top heel, but it could have been winner Jonny Firestorm who beat out equally likely candidate I may have voted for, Kid Karisma, by 11 points.  Since there was no category for most mindblowing forearms (next year, people!), I’m glad Jonny tucked this one under his belt.

Best Squash: Jopperpalooza 12: The Works Jonny Firestorm v Jake Jenkins
Best squash was not close at all, but I sided with the 17% of decisively swung for Kid Karisma’s gorgeous, sexy beatdown on Skip Vance in Mat Mayhem 23 rather than category winner Jonny Firestorm and Jake Jenkins for Jobberpalooza 12: The Works.  I’m glad The Works got a shout out somewhere in the poll results, though.  And the writing was on the wall, really, with Jake voted top babyface and Jonny voted top heel!

Jobber of the Year: Rio Garza
Jobber of the year went to fan favorite Rio Garza by 9 percentage points over my pick, Skip Vance.  Rio’s got an extremely loyal and not infrequently aggressive (to the point of rude) fan base that makes this result unsurprising to me.  For my tastes, however, Skip is much more a classic jobber and entertaining sell.  Rio’s awfully entertaining to watch job, too, though.

Debut of the Year: Eli Black
Again, I think was with the herd in picking Eli as the best debut of 2012 by 12 points over Damien, though this could easily have gone a different direction and I’d have been entirely on board.  It feels like Eli’s been at BG East for years and years, which suggests to me why this was, as Eli would be happy to tell you, his year!

Best Spotlight Release: Wrestler Spotlight: Austin Cooper
Best spotlight release feature was an 11 point spread between Eli and category winner Austin Cooper.  While this doesn’t surprise me, and if I were a betting man I’d have put money down and made money back on this outcome, I placed my vote for last place winner Denny Cartier because his Leopard’s Lair 4 anchor position was fucking AWESOME, and essentially 4 barnburner and brutal bouts for the price of 2.  I love, love, love me some Denny Cartier and one of my fondest wishes for 2013 is to see him tap into a nasty streak and headline a new category for next year’s voting: best heel turn!

Best Abs: Eli Black
Best abs was a surprisingly (to me) narrow victory of 2 points by Eli over Jake.  What makes for “best” when it comes to bodies and their parts is, obviously, subjective, however my vote went for Lon Dumont by a mile and a half.  At the risk of pissing off Eli, I just have to say Eli’s phenomenal 8-pack seems to me to be about 60% conditioning and 40% mass, whereas Lon’s anatomy chart abdominals (the whole pacakge: serratus, obliques, abdomini) are a more aesthetically balanced and all around stunning beauty.  I don’t begrudge Eli’s victory at all, mind you, but I just shake my head and contemplate my vast distance from the herd when I see that Lon placed last.  For me and my tastes, I think this calls for a Lon v Eli gut bash in 2013.

Best Bulge: Mr. Joshua Goodman
I was, however, right in the middle of the pack in voting for best bulge winner (by 4 points) Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), who slapped down his junk to power hit past Gabriel Ross’ anaconda.  There wasn’t one candidate in this field that couldn’t easily own the title, and I’d go so far as to say that this year was a bumber crop of mountainous packages. Now the task for 2013 is for one of those club boys that he likes to take home and challenge to wrestle for the chance to put Mr. J on his knees, to literally shock the pants off of Mr. J and finally, finally, finally unleash the beast within.  I guarantee I’ll buy three copies of that release!

Best Butt: Kid Karisma
Best butt was a horse race between category winner Kid Karisma and 2nd place finisher (by a nose) Cameron Matthews.  While we can’t go wrong with any of the contenders for this title, I’m happy to admit I voted for and was campaign chairman for Kid K’s glorious glutes to grab this title.  Again, I say, the ferocity of this competition clearly warrants a Kid K v Cameron rip ‘n strip ring battle to be decided by who makes whom kiss his ass. I’ll pay a premium for a front row seat to that one!

Best Body: Rio Garza
Best body again revealed the distance between me and the herd, with Rio Garza taking the title by 4 points over 2nd place Austin Cooper.  Arguably, this could be the most subjective of all of these wildly subjective categories, because what bodies turn us on follow such divergent tastes in bodies among wrestling fans.  If this were strictly about physical conditioning and muscle mass, the 2 bodybuilders at the bottom of the heap, Magnus and my choice Lon Dumont, could have easily vied for the top spots.  Again, this line of reasoning makes my loins ache to see Magnus and Lon in a head-to-head catchweight ring match of bodybuilding beauties.  However, 21% of fans preferred the body of beautifully proportioned, lickably smooth Rio, which I get, despite my tastes drawing me strongly elsewhere.

Hottest Liplock: X-Fights 34 Gabriel Ross and Drake Marcos
The final category placed me back among the masses in selecting the blazingly hot X-Fights 34 match between Drake Marcos and Gabriel Ross, obliterating the competition with 54% of the vote!  Truth be told, I could easily be tempted to swing for the incredibly sexy and, yes, I’ll say it, wrestling romantic liplock that Enforcer slapped on Maskador in Masked Mayhem 10 as the ripped hunk hung battered and helpless in a tree of woe, halfway to being entirely unmasked.  I admit it: I’ve also gotten off to that scene from Spiderman where Tobey Maguire hangs upside down, his masked half pulled off, as his co-star sucks hero face.  Gorgeous fantasy!  But holy hell, the heat generated by Drake and Gabriel could heat Reykjavik for year!
What a year!  BG East pieced together an incredible collection of outstanding homoerotic wrestling, and all of the nominees and the entire catalog of 2012 releases deserves all this and much more credit.  Nicely done, gentlemen! 

Your Civic Duty

There’s no category for most phenomenal forearms, but you can vote for Jonny Firestorm as  Best Heel of 2012.

I’m still recovering from a wrenched neck, but I wanted to broadcast loud and clear your moral imperative to vote in the currently (and briefly!) running, first ever (I believe), BG East year-end review fan poll.  We have 14 categories to vote for our favorites of the 2012 BG East releases, and the decisions are brutal, I tell you!  I just submitted my ballot, and I found it seriously tough to pick from the extremely fine field of contenders.  The Best Bulge category alone took me about 20 minutes to painstakingly research, because how do you decide between the pendulous packages of Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), pretty Pete Sharp, Jobe Zander, Dylon Roberts, and Gabriel Ross!?  I don’t want to unduly influence the democratic process, so I’ll try to refrain from telling you who to vote for (though, seriously, people, check out my first day of Christmas present before you register your vote for Best Butt!).

For your consideration: Kid Karisma is up for Top Heel and Best Butt

This blog is also abundantly quoted in the year end celebration from BG East in which they announced the poll.  I feel like I say it a lot, but it bears repeating, the boys at BG East (both in front of and behind the cameras) are true friends of neverland, not just because they produce the top tier homoerotic wrestling products available, but also because they indulge me with permissions to use their copyrighted materials.  And most importantly, they’re just good guys… generous, understanding, and having just as much fun making these wrestling fantasies happen as you and I enjoy consuming them.  Whoever comes out on top of the polls, BG East is chocked full of winners in my book.

Lon Dumont is nominated for Top Heel, Best Abs, Best Butt, AND Best Body!

Now go vote, because polls close this Sunday, January 20, midnight EST.  And if you do want me to tell you who to vote for, just ask.

On the First Day of Christmas, Santa Brought to Me…

About a third of the world is of the variety to celebrate Christmas, which seems neither here nor there with regard to this blog.  However, I’m never one to pass up the opportunity to sit on a big, burly, mature bear’s lap and ask for goodies that I’ve done absolutely nothing to deserve.  So I found the nearest mall Santa about a week ago.  He had a real beard, but his breath smelled like onions, so the illusion was a little ruined for me.  However, when he asked if I’d been a good boy, I crossed my fingers and swore up and down that I was an angel all year.  Thus assured, he went for the money shot: “So what would you like for Christmas this year, little boy?”  At precisely the moment that the mall photographer snapped a shot of the two of us, I proceeded to describe in specific detail my list of lustful obsessions.  Santa got awful quiet.  His face turned a little rosier than usual.  I have no idea how often he gets requests for candid shots of homoerotic wrestlers showing off their best (and my favorite) assets especially for me.  I thought the old guy might have been a little scandalized, but I swear  to Jack Frost that Santa sprouted wood (and sitting on his lap, I should know!).  Santa patted my balding head gently with a bit of a dazed and befuddled look in his eyes.  He didn’t even say goodbye!  I walked away with no promises made and perhaps just a little anxiety that I was about to be chased off the property.  However, I was not led away in handcuffs by a big, burly mall cop (perhaps that’ll be on next year’s wish list).  Like so many fantasies of magical thinking, I woke up this morning prepared for my dreams to be shattered.  And then, to what did my wondering eyes should appear, but possibly the sexiest Christmas gift… ever!  Santa came through, and BIG time!  On the first day of Christmas I got the very first item on my wish list!

“On the first day of Christmas, Santa brought to me…”

From Santa to me, via my long-reigning #1 favorite homoerotic wrestler (who is as generous as he is dizzingly sexy!), the first day of Christmas brought me a photo shoot starring one of the (or just the?) sexiest asses on the planet which belongs to, of course, perfectly naughty erotic wrestler Kid Karisma.

I must have been a very, very good boy!

Santa, BABY

Clearly Santa and Kid Karisma know exactly what’s on my list of favorite things!
Sexiest sight on the planet: Singlet straps off the shoulders and sliding down Kid Karisma’s world class ass! 
Seriously, I asked for “a candid pic of Kid K showing his ass just for me,” but Santa brought me an entire Kid K ass montage!
And gravy on top: Kid K sharing a gratuitous shot of his 8-pack and tree trunks!  I’m feeling extremely warm and toasty right now!
Oh… my… god!  Yes, without a doubt, I believe in Santa… and I just had an extremely messy Christmas  morning wank! Thank you (a thousand times) Santa and his #1 sexy helper, Kid Karisma!

Drake Is Just Getting Started

I love it when BG East fans turn the corner and become BG East wrestlers!  For one thing, I think they’ve got a leg up in already knowing the scene.  A wrestler who arrives already knowing the story of the epic heel turn of Brad Rochelle, for example, is immediately starting off at an entirely different level in speaking to me as a fan, I think.  But even more, a new wrestler who has been a long-time fan has a greater chance of already knowing about fan blogs like this one.  Case in point: BG East rookie x-fighter, Drake Marcos.  Well before his debut release in X-Fights 34, I caught sight of sexy Drake in a behind-the-scenes pic off off Kid Karisma’s blog post about the September taping in Pembroke.  Young Drake caught my eye, sandwiched so tightly between big, burly bear Red Baron and blond, blue-eyed Canuck, Blaine Janus.  I gushed a bit here at neverland, speculating on what this handsome young hottie might bring with him as a newbie to the scene.  Little did I know that Drake not only follows BG East as an avid fan, he also reads neverland!  He reached out and thanked me for the shout out.  One thing led to another, and of course I talked BG East’s newest x-fighter into giving me an interview.  I had no idea the auspicious location he was in when we chatted, and another surprise I had, once I had Drake on the line, was how fast time flies when chatting with him.  He likes to talk about all things homoerotic and wrestling every bit as much as I do, and you and I both know that’s saying a whole, whole lot!  So here’s the transcript of my extensive chat with the cheshire cat of BG East’s rookie line up in Catalog 96.  For your viewing and reading pleasure, let me introduce Drake Marcos
Drake Marcos: 5’10”, 155 lbs, damn happy to wrestle for BG East!

Bard: So, Drake Marcos, it’s a great pleasure to meet you! On behalf of BG East fans, welcome into our wrestling fantasies! If I’m not mistaken, you’re the handsome stud sandwiched between Blaine Janus and Alan aka Red Baron in one of Kid Karisma’s pics that he posted on his blog in September. How does it feel with your debut release just out, to have joined the elite ranks of BG East wrestlers?

Drake first appeared here at neverland as that unnamed hottie between Blaine Janus and Red Baron

Drake: Pleasure to meet you as well, Bard! And you’re far too kind! I am the fresh face from KK’s blog. That shot was taken before heading out to the airport after a whirlwind week of shooting at the fabled BG East house. After reading this blog in the past and gaining some insight on what makes some other wrestling fans tick, it’s different to be in the role of “wrestler,” and no longer just a fan. It’s exhilarating to be on camera once again doing something that began as a hobby, and kind of “dirty little secret”, and it’s even more so that people are responding to my BG East debut. And with that new catalog? I am extremely proud of being a part of that lineup and mixing it up with guys I’ve admired for a bit now.

“My smile has a mind of its own…”

Bard: It’s obvious from your debut match against that brand new muscleboy version of Gabriel Ross that you’ve got plenty of insight into what makes erotic wrestling so hot! Before I ask you about getting your hands all over lovely Gabriel, though, I want to ask how you were “discovered?” The website says that you contacted them, they checked you out, and then you got the invite to show up for that whirlwind week of shooting. What was the vetting process like? How did it feel to get the word that you made the cut and were invited to join the ranks of BG East wrestlers?

Drake: The story on the site is kind of oversimplified. Basically I’ve known Kid Leopard for nearly a decade. We’ve had multiple conversations online. He’d extended the offer to bring me out for training in the past, but there’s a long backstory involving inner spiritual turmoil and near crippling body dysmorphia issues, and I demurred for a good while. Then, late last year, I jokingly applied as a model for the now-defunct HBWL and was put in contact with the owner, and next thing I know, I’d completed three shoots for them and received a message on, also now defunct, Grunts ‘N Groans from KL that said, simply, “No more excuses, it’s time.” And with a slight hesitation, I accepted. With everything official and settled, I threw my ass headlong into the gym and began to get myself into better shape for BG East, and I hope that translated to camera. I credit much of the early blossoming of my sexuality to BG East, oddly enough. So the idea that someone saw me as a good fit for the site was quite overwhelming. I was determined not to let KL down with my fitness or any fans that may have been holdovers from HBWL.

Bard: I hear the jokers that write the text for the BG East website often oversimplify things! Fascinating to hear the story and to read between the lines of what sounds like even more story. I’m thrilled that you battled whatever demons were necessary to “throw your ass headlong” into this adventure! I found your presence in the mat room for X-Fights 34… compelling, to say the least. Having such a long build up to get to that day, what was it like when the boys at BG East said, “Oh, and by the way, you’re going to wrestle your first match against the massively muscled gym bunny that ate Gabriel Ross whole?”

Drake gets thrown to the wolves

Drake: Gabriel Ross ate himself whole? [laughing] That backstory is a Lifetime movie slash one-man play slash gay coming-of-age novel just…sexier, I guess, considering where it’s brought me. Hearing that I would be making my debut against Gabriel made me ten kinds of nervous. Granted I’ve a significant height advantage, and maybe (maybe!) a few pounds, I simply did not have the muscle I needed to gain an advantage against him on the mats. That, and Gabriel chose me for his first match back to the BG East world. Here I was barely off the plane and he was already preying on the unexperienced new wrestler. Nothing like getting thrown to the wolves on your first day. But if the wolves are that sexy…
          Had you asked me before fighting Gabriel who I wanted to cut my teeth against I would have picked someone equally as new and with similar stats, but after? I can’t imagine a better way to get the ball rolling. And it definitely got me amped for the opponents I had later in the week.

Bard: I know of no other believable explanation for how lovely “little” Gabriel Ross turned into that massive musclebound basher than to believe a gorgeous gym bunny ate him. I’m sticking to it. So hold that thought about who else you faced, because you know for a fact I’m coming back to that topic! But let me linger just a bit on diabolically innocent looking Gabriel hand-picking you to give you that wad-blowing welcome he gave you in X-Fights 34. So there’s just no way to miss the grin stretching from ear to ear across your face through most of this match (excluding the moments when your face is buried between his skull-crunching thighs or twisted in such exquisite agony). Was it difficult maintaining your focus on the wrestling? You get in some enviable muscle worship in there, and I couldn’t help but think jealously of the phrase “between a rock and a hard place” when he repeatedly delighted in just slamming his bulging body down on top of you and pounding the air out of your lungs. Was the mix of pain and pleasure what you expected it to be, and would you do anything differently, knowing what you know now about Gabriel 2.0?

Gabriel gives Drake a thrill he’ll be chasing for a long time
“… so easy to get lost in worshipping him”

Drake: Well it took me a minute to let it sink in when I was told that Gabriel wanted to face me. First: flattered that such a hot stud wanted me for a match. Second: worry; you don’t challenge someone to a match unless you think you are going to be able to come out on top. So about that grin… I loved every second of that fight. The brief moments when I had Gabriel where I wanted him, and yes, even when he used his considerable experience to show me for the rookie I am. My smile has a mind of its own; I have a hard time suppressing emotion, so when I’m happy, that joker’s grin asserts itself. He used his considerable muscle and appeal to distract me, yes.  There were times I wanted to say: “Fuck wrestling…we’re just going to go at it!” but something deep inside told me that I needed to avenge that opening submission and, if possible, use my own sexual desire as a weapon to maybe turn the tide of the match in my favor. But it was so easy to get lost in worshipping him. It took the body splashes and the rib-crumbling body scissors to remind me that we were still fighting. The pain was a lot more exquisite than I was expecting, and the pleasure far outweighed even my strongest fantasies. The two of those things together though are something I’ll probably chase for a while. It was, essentially, my own lust and over eager attitude that contributed to my debut downfall at the hands of the Brit, and given the chance of a rematch, I would eagerly snatch it up and would definitely do better on a second go around. I’m more focused, and in better shape than the first time. Gabriel can rest easy with this win, but next time he hits American shores I’ll be ready.

Drake goes down under the expert attention of an angel-faced veteran

Bard: Well, if you’re going to “go down,” what a fantastic way to do it – in the expert hands of someone like Gabriel Ross! So, not to trigger your body dysmorphia, but I typically ask wrestlers I interview what part of their body they’re most proud of. Particularly as you’re so committed to forging your body into better and better shape, what are you liking about you’re body these days?

Drake’s new abs take a beating, which
he gives right back to Gabriel.

Drake: Overall I’ve been pretty shy about revealing my body for a great deal of my life. I’m talking cutting out of class early so I could change for PE alone. Before coming out I used to weigh about 50 lbs more than I do now, and it wasn’t muscle. That weight eventually proved itself to be stress weight and kind of melted off in quick fashion, and I never really did anything else to improve my body because I was terrified of the gym and judgment. So the dysmorphia would assert itself much more as an adult because, in my mind, I was still carrying that extra weight. It was about a year before finally accepting Kid Leopard’s offer that I started to get kind of serious about getting in shape. I mean, I was getting naked on camera in HBWL; no one wants to see an out of shape guy doing that [laughing]. My body wasn’t quite changing the way I wanted it to, and it wasn’t until I started doing Insanity that I realized where I had went wrong. And now that you see what my dysmorphia has done to my life you want me to focus on my body? [laughing] Kidding… Okay I’ve always been kind of fond of my own smile and eyes.  I’ve received compliments about them my whole life, but those are two features I can’t really be proud of because I have no hand in their development. But as I work my way through Insanity, I am noticing some amazing major changes.  I’m finally building some muscle and melting off some weight. I’m beginning to pay more attention to my legs as my thighs become solid, but my kind of favorite feature now is my rapidly developing abs. I didn’t really think I had them, honestly. After two weeks on this program they began introducing them selves to my mirror. I’ve been sore tempted to just stop and accept the body I have achieved so far because a) I’ve never felt so good in my life, and b) I’ve never looked this good in my life. The thing is though, I’m only halfway through the program; if the first half was this good to me, I can only imagine how good the next one is going to be. Before I embarked on this workout I told everyone that my goal was to look like a cheese grater.

Bard: Well, I’m guessing there are plenty of guys who’ll be happy to rub something up and down your body, but I don’t think it’ll involve cheese! You look damn sexy to me! You’re crazy-handsome (thus my fawning comparisons to John Fugelsang on my blog, who I think is incredibly hot). And your legs are simply gorgeous. I predict you’re going to make boys cry when you’ve snapped shut those scissors around them. Speaking of which, at this early point in your wrestling career, what do you think is the strongest aspect of your wrestling arsenal? What holds or maneuvers do you think are your most effective, and equally as important, what holds turn you on the hardest (either giving or receiving)?

“I’m rather fond of my full nelson/body scissors combo.”

Drake: You’re buttering me up and then asking me to wax arrogant on what I find to be amazing about myself…well played, Bard! [laughing] You’re far too kind with the compliments, but I’m fine with that. When it comes to wrestling I haven’t quite had a chance to show what I’m capable of just yet; rest assured that I will though. But I think that my good-guy attitude and good-natured personality are kind of disarming when I actually get someone in pain. I may not look tough, but that’s part of it all. I’m kind of a bitch when it gets down to it. Given the chance, I will fuck someone up. Yes, I kind of want to use my legs to dominate in the future, but until I have them up to caliber for that kind of action, I’m rather fond of my full nelson body scissor combo. Yes, Gabriel held up surprisingly well in my full nelson, but he’s also more experienced and caught me off guard. I’m really flexible and can take a lot of pain (especially now that I know what I’m up against in this company) and like to pay it back in spades. In terms of getting aroused during combat, those who’ve known me for a while know that I’m a sleeper and chokehold fanatic. Any time someone is wrapped up tight and you get to watch the fight drain from their eyes, the realization sinking in that it’s all over and there’s not a damn thing to be done, the muscles losing control and hanging limp as their body shuts down and accepts defeat is the hottest thing in the world to me.

Drake likes wrapping them up tight and watching the fight drain from their eyes.

Bard: I’m an expert butterer (take that however you’d like)! However, I refute your claim that I am too kind. I just call it like I see it. And I call your description of what turns you on about a sleeper/chokehold wildly hot! I cannot wait to see you put some stud out cold, and then disentangle yourself from his unconscious body with you fully aroused. That’s gold-plated platinum, right there, that is! Who else have you wrestled so far for BG East? And, knowing that Kid Leopard would crush both our sets of testicles if you were to answer that question, who on the BG East’s present roster would you most like to sleeper out cold?

Drake: [laughing] As for who I’d like to fall victim to my sleeper? I have a few in mind… Skip Vance for one, Len Harder for the shit talk on Grunts N’ Groans, and definitely Ben Monaco for the shit talk exchange on Facebook, that would be ultra satisfying. And I hate to say it, Bard, but I would love to take down your resident god: Kid Karisma. The first three I know are entirely possible; Kid K would be a major stroke of luck, however. Being honest, I know I’m not near the level of competition or skill for Kid K, but I would kill for the shot.

Drake has his sights set on patron saint of
neverland, Kid Karisma

Bard: That’s a fantastic menu! I love to hear that you boys mix it up with trash talk online. Nothing, but nothing hotter than an erotic grudge match! And I’d love to see you give Kid K a go! But I warn you, if you found Gabriel Ross’s hot bod distracting, you’d better include some hardcore tantric meditation to your training schedule, because you wouldn’t be the first challenger to get completely thrown off your game plan when he shoves that world class ass in your face and flexes for you. I definitely want to see that match happen… from the front row! Since you’ve been a BG East fan for a while, who are some of the classic wrestlers who’ve retired from the scene that you would’ve liked to have faced in their prime? And what are some highlights of what those fantasy matches would have entailed?

Drake: I know I’m possibly signing my own death certificate by throwing that kind of challenge out there at Kid K, and I know I’m not quite ready to compete at that level quite yet. That’s why I’m secretly hoping he doesn’t show up at a shoot that I’m at soon! But I do believe, that, with enough training and preparation that, if I can’t beat him, I’m definitely going to give that flawless ass a run for its money.

Josh Avery talks top notch trash

     Now, asking me to dig back quite a bit in my memory in my fantasies… Three names pop out immediately: Aryx Quinn, Nick Archer, and Josh Avery. Those three guys have crossed paths with each other. The first BG East match I ever purchased was a grudge match with Nick and Josh. Josh’s complete inhalation of Nick in the ring is almost the entire encapsulation of my erotic wrestling fantasies; unfortunately Josh was a one trick pony. His matches followed the same patterns that kind of wore thin after a while. Anyone who has seen more than one of his matches will know what I’m talking about. His trash talk in the aforementioned match is epic and so hot to me.

Aryx Quinn and Nick Archer round out
Drake’s classic fantasy list

     Aryx Quinn: that’s the only thing that really needs said is his name. When I first started checking out the stuff he was putting out, I loved his bad guy, pretty face, dominating attitude. But as time went on, I started seeing him get his ass handed to him and that became much hotter to me. The thought of taking down those two big-mouthed pretty boys and shutting them up? Taking a page from Josh’s own book and flexing over his unconscious body, each flex signifying a count all the way up to ten? Yea, and Aryx, finally seeing him with absolutely nothing to say, no witty retort, no stuttered trash talk, my foot on his heaving sweaty chest. That shit excites me.
     Finally Nick Archer: as much as I loved watching him getting methodically torn apart, I kind of want to experience defeat at his hands. Short, ripped little fucker, making me fade away helplessly in his classic, figure-4 head scissor. Shit, I’m going to have to revisit some of those matches for the holiday season!

Bard: Hot, hot, hot! I love the fact that you know the BGE catalogue so well. I’m making an educated guess that your familiarity with the classics will be a major asset in your evolving homoerotic wrestling career. Taking the best, hottest elements of the best and hottest wrestlers seems like it would automatically give you a huge leg up against other wrestlers, particularly other rookies. And personally, I think any wrestler who wears headgear into the ring (a la Josh Avery) should get tied into the ropes with said headgear stuffed down his trunks. But that may be just me. So Aryx, Nick, and Josh… I’m sensing a prettyboy-jock theme. Are there particular themes to the guys that get your heart pumping hardest? Angelic-looking sadists with gym bunny bodies and English accents can obviously top you off, but do you have other “tastes” that you tend toward in your guys?

Drake remembers well that it was Justin
Pierce who stole Josh Avery’s headgear and
put the trash talker to sleep!

Drake: I think it was Justin Pierce, actually, who beat Josh Avery’s ass, stripped him of his headgear and then wore it himself as he put Josh to rest. Not only that, but left Josh lying in a heap, Justin claiming the headgear as his own. – Pretty boy jock theme, huh? Never really thought of it that way; makes sense looking back on it. But I think when it comes down to wrestling and all, I think what really gets me going is the self-assured, confident, arrogant, mouthy guys who think they’re Superman, untouchable, invincible. That attitude is hot to me. However, the tantalizing thing about that attitude is when they get their comeuppance, are defeated and humiliated. Egos totally wounded, crushed, humbled. That is what gets me going. But in terms of picking guys to go toe-to-toe with, they can’t be behemoths. Or too tall, unless they have that attitude I crave. I prefer guys that are, at the very least, in as good of shape as me, or are built well. Gym bunny bodies are awesome, but guys who are a little more Everyman (in shape, but not an Adonis) are more my speed. You don’t really know what you’re going to get from those guys. They’re the ones that shock and dazzle. And then there are some that just suck [laughing]. But you’ve got to kiss a lot of frogs right?

K-Pop hardbody, Jay Park

     However, I have a certain weakness for Asian guys. Spend 5 minutes researching K-Pop on YouTube (for example, G-Dragon, Tae Yang, Jay Park). Those are my penultimate, favorite guys – either in the ring, bed, or (prophetic) altar. I want those types of guys. As well as the Everyman, those are the ones you really don’t know what to expect from. I haven’t been let down thus far, let’s just say that. Accents are also a pretty good turn on as well. A good grasp of English is required, but the stumbling, fresh off the boat accents are hilarious and adorable.
     It’s always been kind of weird to me, though, when I think about the wrestling/dating aspect. I know there’s the legendary Christian/Skip fairy tale wrestling romance, that I’d like to find some day. But, usually, when I’m dating someone, wrestling them is the farthest thing from my mind. Weird, I know. But I am sort of a private person in a lot of aspects. The wrestling part of my life is kept separate from my personal life, and I’m kind of okay with that. Now that’s not to say that I don’t have fun and don’t wrestle off camera, I do that. But, at this point in time, I feel more at ease and organized with keeping the two as separate entities. Who knows, though? Maybe down the road the two will merge into a perfect union. Only time will tell.

Bard: Fascinating! It’s a sad thing not all of us can enjoy a “wrestling romance” as wrestling-hot as Christian and Skip. You’ll have to let us at neverland know if these two worlds collide for you in the future. Maybe Skip and Christian can set you up with some wrestling stud that they know of on the market. So, 1) who would be your top pick for a tag team partner, 2) who would you face first, and 3) which of the four of you ends up tied in the ropes and force-fed cock? Oh, wait, that last part is my answer to the question, “What would be the climax to that match,” so perhaps that should be your number 3.

Mr. Janus had better hold up his end of a
tag team with Drake, or else!

Drake: I’ve never really thought of the whole tag team aspect before.  It’s never figured into my fantasies. I’ve always been kind of focused on doing a job myself, but if I’m facing insurmountable odds and need help, I’d probably like to have Nick Archer on my side. The things I could learn from him! And if I can’t have him, then I’ll want Blaine Janus because he and I developed a connection at the last shoot, and I think we’d work well together because of that. And it would be fun to go up against Christian and Skip or Skrapper and Z-Man. Now I’d think Christian/Skip would fare pretty well against us in a way I don’t think Skrapper and Z-Man would. I’ve seen Z-Man go down far too many times to smaller guys to worry, and that’s a lot of weight for Skrapper to shoulder on his own. So I predict a nice win with Mr. Janus as my partner. And I see that win coming from a hard fight with me cranking one of them out in a sleeper/body scissors combo and Blaine with a nice headscissor on the other one, both studs fading out cold. And if we lose, best believe that Canuck, Blaine, will find himself receiving the torture you mentioned earlier! [laughing]

Bard: Well you may have never figured a tag team partner into your fantasies, but you’ve painted a most provocative picture that I’d pay to see! And I love hearing that you hit it off with Blaine. Damn, that guy puts the “erotic” in homoerotic wrestling! So a couple of years ago I adopted a rule that I saw Kid Leopard enforce on the BG East Headquarters discussion group, banning comments that trash wrestlers with catty comments about their bodies. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how ridiculously hypercritical gay guys can be as “consumers” of each other’s bodies (so to speak), and I occasionally round-bin a comment that someone tries to post on my blog about a wrestler being too skinny, fat, unattractive, etc. At the same time, I realize that I’m one of a chorus of voices promoting my particular tastes in men’s bodies, including (but not limited to) hard, hot muscle hunks with probably unhealthily low body fat and ridiculous genetic gifts. As a new face on the scene who’s upfront about your history of struggling with your body image, do you have any advice for homoerotic wrestling fans about how we talk about you all? And any advice for the countless guys reading these words who struggle with valuing themselves because of body image issues and that internal, hypercritical gay bitch inside each of us all too ready to tear ourselves down for not looking like some completely unrealistic ideal (aka, Lon Dumont… for me, at least)?

Drake: As part of the gay community, you are subject to unfair criticism. In terms of wrestlers, we’re stripping ourselves down on camera so the criticism is heightened. Fueled by a love of the similar tastes and wanting to put something out for the fans, that we ourselves would like to watch, is something we don’t take lightly. When it comes to attacking wrestlers: if you want to sit at your keyboard in the safety and comfort of your home and have the audacity to criticize what we look like, who we are and what we do (or don’t do), I’m not bothered, that’s your shtick. Until you have the guts to do what we do, you have nothing to stand on. We do what we do to make you happy. We have so many different guys to cast in our fantasy roles. If you see someone on the site that you don’t think is attractive or doesn’t fit your ideal, just keep clicking. We have the Adonises. We have the guys who are continuing to work on their bodies. And we have the Everyman. But to take to a wrestling blog and to attack someone’s image is a waste of everybody’s time.

Bard: I hear you! And I hope that I haven’t strayed into that particular shtick too often, because I think you’re absolutely right. You guys who strip down to nearly (or completely!) nothing and not only put your bodies on display but also put them to the test against another competitor (however competitive and/or amorous it gets) deserve 110% respect from those of us who just “consume.” And personally I get stoked by so many different “types” of wrestlers. I love getting totally taken by surprise, making a snap judgment that some wrestler isn’t going to be at the top of my list of fantasies, only to see him in action and find myself totally captured by his body, his intellect, his humor, his personality.

Drake: Yeah, I’m pretty much a fan of the old adage “Everyone is beautiful.” Because it’s true. Concepts of beauty differ greatly across racial and generational lines. Everyone needs to get to a point where they love themselves for who they currently are and what they look like.

Not everyone should look like Stretch Armstrong (who turned me gay)

Bard: So true! I watch British television a lot, and I’m often struck when they have a character who’s supposed to be some gym bunny meat head (often also supposed to be an American, interestingly) who would probably be laughed off the set as nothing special for anything being filmed in Hollywood. Presenting anything other than a highly competitive, zero-body fat, platonically proportioned bodybuilder seems too often to bring out the cattiness in some gay fans. There are a lot of different standards for judging beauty, and insisting that everyone look like a plasticine sculpture of a Stretch Armstrong doll is just ridiculous.

Drake: Since we’re talking about body image everyone needs to accept the reality of how you currently look and decide if there’s something you want to change. There are literally millions of avenues to getting into the shape you want. The hardest part of all this is committing to doing it though. It takes 2 weeks to develop a habit. Give yourself at least 14 days of doing something everyday, and then you’ll continue to do it. And the worst thing you can do going into physical fitness is wanting to have the body of someone else. No one has identical bodies. Every body is built differently and with different potentials. What you need to do is go into it wanting to be in the best shape possible: that includes a healthy diet, a good workout program, and an attitude that it is possible.

Bard: I think that sounds like an awesome attitude and approach, Drake! I think it’s also a nice corrective to the tendency to latch onto one “ideal” body and hold ourselves, and our homoerotic wrestling objects of lust, up to that one image. Your comments send me self-reflecting on this blog, and the ways that I may intentionally or inadvertently promote unrealistic body images for wrestlers and readers. Regularly picking my favorites probably says a lot about the range (or lack thereof) of what I think of as ideal. You’ve given me a lot of food for thought!

Like Zac Efron, but even better

Drake: As I apply this to myself, even before my actual attempt at getting in shape my ideal was Zac Efron. Now that I’m actually working out and seeing results I would say I have the potential to look even better! But I wouldn’t necessarily say you’re guilty of promoting unrealistic ideals. I mean, these guys exist, so it’s obviously realistic, but for them. But different bodies, different potentials. People don’t need to kill themselves to look like someone else, because what’s the fun in that? Don’t you want to stand out from the crowd? I worship at the altar of individuality often. I celebrate people who are completely their own person and don’t compromise to fit other people’s perceptions. Whenever I witness someone doing something completely out of the norm I find myself wanting to be a part of it. That’s how it’s been my whole life, always something new, off the wall. And ultimately I think it’s that attitude that’s brought me here. BG East is not filled with a bunch of skinny boys having sex. It’s filled with all body types struggling against each other to achieve physical dominance and superiority. It’s primal. It’s sensual. It’s hot as hell!

Bard: Hell, yes! Smokin’ hot wrestlers come in all sorts of packages! I’ll take that “necessarily” to heart, and I sincerely appreciate your words of caution about worshipping too much at the altar of cookie-cutter fitness model physiques. I think this conversation is good for me as I think about how I write about wrestlers and how I think about my own fitness goals. You rock.

Drake: Well, it’s your blog, your little corner of the web to say what you think unfettered by other people’s thoughts. If you feel like saying someone has the penultimate bod, I think you should be allowed to express that. One more thing I wanna say about fitness before we move away from that is: I am not a fitness guru, nor am I a physical trainer. I’m far from that. I’m just a guy who came late for the party and is stuck cleaning up the mess. I can only speak from my personal, frighteningly sparse, experience. So with that forewarning, another key to getting yourself on track is friends and accountability. I lost track of how many people have noticed my improvements, even ones that I didn’t see with my mirrored “progress checks” (which occur every few hours.) That, especially, serves to buoy and foster confidence that what you’re doing is working: other people’s validation. You’re your own worst critic, but once you’ve got others on board supporting you, those self-defeating voices eventually begin to fade.

Bard: Again, that sounds like excellent advice! So… Zac Efron? Okay. I’ll be fine with you having his body (or better). But as for who you look like, when I saw Kid K’s pic of you from the September shoot at BG East, I mentioned on my blog that you sort of had a John Fugelsang look about you. Tell me that you get that all the time, that you look like John Fugelsang. And holy shit, John Fugelsang as an X-fighter homoerotic wrestler… holy… shit! What an idea!!!

Separated at birth?

Drake: [laughing] I didn’t even know what a “John Fugelsang” is, but a quick search online shows he’s an actor with some left-leaning comedic leanings, which I can definitely get into. But yeah, I kinda see it.  As for others I’ve asked: no one knows who he is either. So I’m afraid you’re kind of alone in that. I have, however, been compared to other celebrities: Ricky Ullman (Disney Channel’s “Phil of the Future”), Jim Parsons (Sheldon of “Big Bang Theory), Tony Dow (Wally of “Leave It To Beaver – 50s sitcom), and Sean Hayes (Jack from NBC’s “Will and Grace”). But since Kid Leopard can work magic maybe we can get that matchup between me and Fugelsang put together. A loosely connected sequel to “The Time Traveler’s Wife,” but this would be “The Time Traveler’s Battle,” where he travels back in time to wrestle his younger self [laughing].

Wally Cleaver as erotic wrestler!

Bard: I’m okay with being fettered… if it’s consensual. And I’m okay if I’m the only guy in the world who suddenly found America’s Funniest Videos wildly erotic during the brief period it was co-hosted by John Fugelsang. Seriously, I… got… off to AFV for him. Sharing too much? Suffice it to say I intended the Fugelsang comparison as a major compliment. And you X-fighting John Fugelsang would surely rip a hole in the space-time continuum with the over the top explosive eroticism. I had to look up Ricky Ullman, which suddenly makes me feel old. However I think you’re several times hotter than Jim Parsons or Sean Hayes, though if I saw you in black and white, I think I’d agree with the Tony Dow comparisons. I won’t bother going into detail about what Leave It to Beaver reruns did for me (a lot).

Drake: I had a nagging suspicion that I had seen him in something before but couldn’t put my finger on it, but you nailed it! I have seen Fugelsang around before, just didn’t know his name! Since I’m apparently his doppelgänger, it’d be in poor taste for me to say I find him attractive, right? This all being said, I really am going to develop an ego with all the compliments you’ve been feeding me… Stop…please…(keep ‘em coming)! [laughing]

Bard: Well I’m fantasizing about you in an X-fight with Fugelsang, so if you find him attractive, all the better on my end. So we’ve been at this interview for a while, and I think I could keep chatting for hours longer with you, but I suspect you have a life to get on with. You’ve given neverland readers, and me in particular, a ton of great stuff to ponder and look forward to. Anything else you’d like to say by way of introduction to BG East fans sitting up and taking note of Drake Marcos’ arrival on the scene?

Drake: I’ve had a blast chatting with you about all of this and am so sad it’s ending! This has been way too fun! As we talk, I’m sitting in an airport in Atlanta waiting for my flight to Ft. Lauderdale where I will be getting up to some more BG East hijinks, so definitely want to say you can expect more from yours truly, Drake Marcos. Maybe some of my comments here can prick the ears of future challengers and we can get the wheels rolling on those. I plan on either starting blogging or tweeting soon (I’ll keep you informed) to capture all of the BG East goodness, because I’d like to be at this for a little bit. I derive great pleasure in giving people what they want to see and hear so stick with me, because Drake is just getting started.

Having had a taste of BG East wrestling,
Drake is definitely heading back for more!

Bard: Fantastic to hear that you’re on your way to your next taping with the BG East boys! I hope it’s wildly raunchy and incredibly hot! And I love the news that you’re contemplating documenting your journey in homoerotic wrestling in blog or tweet format. Let me know the moment you start so we can get folks tuning into Drake Marcos’ next big adventure! And finally, take some behind the scenes photos at the Florida compound. I love, love, love the behind the scenes photos. Fly safe and play hard, Drake!

Drake: I will certainly do that, Bard. It was a pleasure chatting with you and I look forward to doing it again soon!

Upperclassman

I’ve marveled here already about the first two in the truly fantastic collection of BG East matches in their latest release in the Gazebo Grapplers series.  The marquee match pits Mr. Rush’s little trust fund baby, Damien Rush (looking hunkier than ever) against Canadian sex-bomb and friend of this blog, Ben Monaco.  Ben graciously sat down with me to talk about his latest outing for BG East and speculate about all sorts of hot topics concerning homoerotic wrestling.
Ben Monaco: 5’10”, 175 pounds, 100% Canadian

Bard: Ben, thank you for agreeing to another interview for the homoerotic wrestling fans at neverland. And I want to publicly and directly thank you again for all of the juicy behind the scenes news and candid pics you shared with us from the taping you did for BG East in September. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: You rock! And speaking of you rocking and that September hunk-fest in Pembroke, am I right in guessing that your most recent match for Gazebo Grapplers 14 against gorgeous trust fund baby Damien Rush was filmed at that time?

Just a little of the eye candy at BG East

Ben: My pleasure Bard! As always, you are too kind with your compliments. I’m more than happy to give the fans my behind-the-scenes look at things, having been (and still being) a homoerotic wrestling fan myself. My match with Damien was filmed during that hunk-filled weekend, you are correct. There definitely was a lot of eye-candy around during that shoot!

Bard: That’s twice in just the past few days that someone has accused me of being too kind in my compliments. I don’t think you appreciate how much I appreciate you, your insights into the homoerotic wrestling business, and your extremely hot wrestling. Speaking of which, your match with Damien was incredible! Tell me exactly, in every prurient detail, what was going through your head when Mr. Rush’s son came strutting into the Gazebo in those skin tight, royal purple trunks and his designer shades looking (though I’d have never believed it if I didn’t see it) even hotter than he did when he got squashed and stripped by Morgan Cruise last spring?

Which celebrity most resembles Damien Rush?

Ben: Well, I knew I was going to be facing off with some punk. At least the Boss sent me a hot looking one. He did look at least 10 times better than his match with Morgan, I’ll give him that. One way or another, I knew that I’d have some fun with that body of his, win or lose.  I also kept trying to figure out who he reminded me of. There’s a vague resemblance to a celebrity but I couldn’t put my finger on which one. Am I crazy?

Bard: I’m sure you’re not crazy. Damien’s definitely got the face of a leading man, but I can’t put my finger on it either. We’ll have to make this a contest on the blog to identify which celebrity hunk Damien resembles most. Although you can’t put your finger on whom he looks like, you certainly did a truly inspired job of getting your hands all over Damien’s hot and hairy bod! And holy shit, when you snatched his shades off his face and made that stunning little rich boy literally whine, I nearly popped my cork before the action even started. Same for when you rip his trunks off of him – the panic in his voice suggests that this trust fund baby is entirely unaccustomed to getting his possessions forcibly removed. Was there a particular moment in this match that was hottest for you?

A good bicep really gets Ben going

Ben: He did have a whiny way about him didn’t he? Despite that, I did enjoy feeling every inch of his hairy body pressed up against mine. Favorite moment…definitely has to be the part where I ended up licking and kissing his bicep. I’m an arm-man. A good bicep really gets me going and Damien has quite the set of guns on him! Could certainly feel some other parts of MY body awakened in that moment…I mean who wouldn’t want to get their mouth on that slab of meat (among his many slabs of meat to choose from, the man is a muscle deli).

Damien can gladly park his ass
anywhere on Ben’s body.

Bard: What a beautiful way you have with words! You should blog. Seriously. And that moment when you’ve taken a serious pounding – you’re looking a little worn thin from getting repeatedly pec smothered deep in Damien’s hairy chest – and he barks at you to kiss his muscles… that’s truly an iconic homoerotic wrestling moment, I think. Were you surprised by that turn in the action? I didn’t know Damien had it in him to possess a longing for an oral muscle worship session. And then that finish, with his thonged/bare ass planted across your face… I’m swooning just a little replaying the scene in my head right now! Tell me you were holding on to enough consciousness to describe the view!

Ben: Thanks, I might just take you up on that…I could use a blog. For now, I’m content to tweet from time to time but I might venture into blogging if I have some more spare time in the new year. Damien may not have the most skills on the mat, but his continued smotherings in his sculpted physique distracted me a bit from my own skills I think. With his flexed bicep rubbed up against my face, I think I completely forgot how to wrestle. Then the ass…well, those glutes truly are a thing of beauty. Especially from the angle I was in, I got to see just how broad he was from below. Next time we meet, he can gladly park that ass anywhere he wants on my body.

Ben nearly rips Damien’s head off his neck.

Bard: I’ll link to your Twitter account here so that your neverland fans can follow you if they aren’t already. Let us know if you start blogging, because I’m first in line to follow you. I think any sane wrestling fan would forgive you for being distracted by how… intently… Damien crushed your face into his body over and over again. Hell, any sane homoerotic wrestling fan is insanely jealous! However I don’t want to give anyone the impression that this match is all about muscle worship and bicep licking. The wrestling in this match is wildly hot and majorly intense! There are moments there where I swear you’re going to rip his skull off his neck or, alternately, rip his balls from his body. With a battle that gets this heated on camera, what’s it like when they turn off the cameras and you’re sitting there in a pool of sweat with this guy who you were moments ago making scream like a whiny bitch in a spine-snapping camel clutch, or who seconds earlier had his gorgeous, bare ass planted across your face?

Ben: It actually was quite strange but I think we gained respect for each other after tearing each other apart. There was a certain chemistry bewteen us before and after the match. Who knows, perhaps a tag-team match could happen in the future.  It’ll be up to the fans to petition the Boss to see us as a tag-team I guess. Could be fun, I’d certainly be open to it. With our combined skills and muscle, we’d be pretty fierce together I think. We’d have to think up a fantastic tag-team name though.

Sex and Candy?

Bard: I’ll lobby for that tag team pairing, and I’m first on the record to vote for the tag team name, “Sex and Candy.” You’d make a blazingly hot duo in the ring! I’m picturing Damien holding them down and you feeling them up. Watch that ego of his, though. I don’t know if the concept of “sharing” was ever something this Damien’s nannies ever taught him, so trying to share the limelight with him could be dangerous. So tell me some more about the rest of the cast of dizzyingly hot eye candy that was on hand in September. You’ve told me privately that the outrageously hunky newbie that made jaws hit the floor was, indeed, Pete Sharp who also appears on Gazebo Grapplers 14. Can you name any more names for us regarding who got your heart pumping behind the scenes?

Ben: Sex and Candy! Love it! Oh trust me, I could convince him to share. Among my other talents, I can be quite persuasive in the right situations. You pretty much know all the guys who were there by now, I think I’ve told you all the names and such in that e-mail I sent you. However, one guy that I was very upset I missed was Braden Charron who showed up the day AFTER I left! I’d have killed to meet him in person and probably commit even more unspeakable acts to get a match with him. But I guess he’ll be on my hit list for another BG East session. Aside from that weekend, I did introduce two new hunks to BG East recently as well who should be making their BG debuts in the near future. And Bard, I think you know from candid pics I sent that these are two big, hot, hairy hunks. But don’t spoil the surprise right away by posting the pics I sent you.

Bard: I’m the paragon of discretion. And possibly blackmail as well, so we can discuss later what I’ll get for restraining myself from showing neverland readers the studs that you’ve recruited into the BG East ranks. Talk about jaw dropping! If there one thing that I’ve learned from our exchanges over the past few months, it’s that you’ve got an incredibly skilled eye for spotting hot wrestling talent. You also mentioned to me that there was a particular slice of rookie gold who had nipples that drove you insane in September, and I believe I’m correct in identifying said magically nippled newbie as Mason Brooks who also debuts on Gazebo 14. This is one stud-packed collection of matches! What was adorable young Mason like off camera, because on camera, he was a fucking wildcat going up against your fellow Canuck, Blaine Janus?

Nipples to make a man salivate: Mason Brooks

Ben: Of course Bard, you are a true gentleman! Indeed, you can’t tell too much from the photos, but Mason certainly has nipples that can make a man salivate. Trust me! He’s actually really quiet and polite off camera. I’m almost on the verge of making him an honorary Canadian for those virtuous qualities! His wilder side does come out on the mats for sure. We’ve kept in touch actually since that weekend. In fact, he texted me yesterday night and told me you were also planning an interview with him. So I guess you’ll have more rookie-perspective on BG East and all the goings-on behind the scenes. To add to what you said, yes Gazebo Grapplers 14 is really a fantastic video. The Boss really knows how to combine matches into a product that has something for everyone on it. I guess that’s why he’s the Boss after all!

Bard: It’s absolutely true, I’ve got Mason on the line for an upcoming rookie interview. You don’t have to convince me about his nipples. He sent me a close-up shot of his torso, and ooo-baby! Dial me up some fun! Blaine also made note of Mason’s lovely nipples in their match, as well, so clearly the boy has got some sweet morsels there that are attracting a lot of attention. Was this round of taping for BG East different for you this time, now that you’re one of the guys who’s been there before? Was there any difference in what it was like for you in action or behind the scenes now that you’re no longer a newbie? Play any upperclassmen pranks on the brand new rookies?

Ben: Well first off, yes it was different. I was in Pembroke, gay-wrestling Mecca if you will. Plus there were about 3 times more guys in the house than my last session in Florida. In action, the feeling was still the same: nerves, excitement, heart pounding, blood racing. Off camera I tried to be as welcoming to the newbies as I could. After all, I know what it’s like being the new kid in town. We all did our best to make the new “kids” welcome. Of course, some are my age or older but since they’re newer than me, I consider new guys “kids.” No pranks this time, but perhaps the next time around now that I think of it…

Bard: It sounds like there’s a great deal of camaraderie when BG East pulls together crowds of wrestlers like that. I interviewed Ken Canada who was a classic jobber from very early in the BG East days who talked about the good vibe both on camera and off, and friendships that endured even after shooting was over. It sounds like that sort of esprit de corps still exists. What do you think accounts for you all in the “business” of homoerotic wrestling building real friendships like that? I could imagine it wouldn’t “have” to turn out that way, some boys just punching the clock, some boys being egomaniacal dicks, etc. But you seem to be part of some seriously sweet community building out of these shoots.

BG East boys play hard off camera (photo via Kid Karisma)

Ben: It is very much a little community. When I was in Florida for my first shoot, there was a BG veteran Scott Williams who just happened to be visiting Florida and stopped in to check out what was going down on our shoot. Anyone who’s met Scott knows he’s a big kid at heart. Naturally, Scott and I were instant buds. We went out for supper a few nights and on random food runs for the gang too. One night at supper, Scott simply said “I’m so happy you’re part of the family!” which indeed is true. Once you’re part of BG East, once your first match is taped, it’s like being part of a family. That shared experience and bond bring us together. It’s never about big grudges off camera, it’s often good natured boys-being-boys friendship. On the mats of course, it becomes a bit more serious, but off camera there are lots of laughs and good times.

Bard: Ohmygodohmygodohmygod! Scott Williams as in Ultra Fight 2 Scott Williams!? Tall, lean, hairy chested, devastatingly handsome Scott Williams who could milk every ounce of agony out of a hold like absolutely no one else!? Scott Williams, who, after I saw him wrestle in Ultra Fight 2, shocked me to realize that I’d kick young Brad Rochelle to the curb to get my hands on his fantastically hairy pecs and nibble on that leading-man chin of his?! You’re now instant buds with that Scott Williams!? So as a new BG East wrestler you just run chores and sit around shooting the breeze with guys who have permanent positions in my pantheon of homoerotic wrestling god infatuations? My mind was just blown to bits. What an incredibly hot fraternity/family you guys comprise!

Ben: Indeed, THAT Scott Williams! It is a little bit of a mind-blowing situation when you first enter the “family”. You become friends and stay in touch with this plethora of hot guys you fantasized about for what seems like your whole life. I mean, it still boggles my mind that I have Cameron Matthews’ cell phone number and a year ago I didn’t even exist in the gay-wrestling scene. BG East really is a welcoming place for all its wrestlers and that’s why I really encourage people to work for them if they have the chance. We’re always looking to expand the family with hot new guys.

Bard: I know some Cam fans who’d do some naughty things to you to get that phone number! Hell, I’d do naughty things to get Scott Williams’ phone number. Oh, who am I kidding? I’d do naughty things just for the fun of doing naughty things to you. Since I know for a fact that you’re actively and successfully recruiting new studs for the stable, what do you think are some essential qualifications for joining the family? I’m guessing the physical demands alone aren’t something that just anyone could jump right into.

Ben: You wouldn’t be the first to want to do naughty things to me and you’re surely not going to be the last [laughing]. As far as joining the ranks of BG East, no matter what I think of a guy, the final decision always comes down to Kid Leopard and/or Kid Vicious. I know they have their own demands and criteria when it comes to their selection of men. As for me, what I tend to look for is a love or interest in wrestling at the very least. From there, I specifically try to hone in on looks or types of guys that aren’t already present in the active roster on BG East. Why would I try to recruit another Skip Vance? There’s already one! I try to find something completely new and original in either style or personailty. Plus, if I can imagine myself hitting the mats with a guy, he’s already got a head start. And as for experience levels, if the guy is relatively new, I certainly don’t mind sacrificing some time to train privately with him…as was the case with my two recruits…one of which is my personal trainer.

Doing naughty things with Ben Monaco

Bard: I’m certain that I’m in a long line of guys thinking about what naughty things to do with you! Since you brought it up, I’ll just say that I’ve seen a photo of your personal trainer, and I’m breathless in anticipation of seeing him wrestle! I love your approach to thinking about looking for wrestlers who bring something new and original to the scene. That’s one thing that I think BG East does possibly better than anyone else – recruit a broad variety of wrestlers across all sorts of measures, including appearance, wrestling experience, and personality. So as always you’ve been incredibly generous with your time in taking my questions again. Now that we’ve grown to know more about you in the past 6 months, what’s one more thing that fans may not yet know about you that you can tell us? Is there one more little personal detail that you can share with us to satisfy our fixations on a new wrestling fantasyman?

Ben: Always happy to take the time out for an interview with you. Now for one last little detail…hmmm…well, I guess a personal detail that I can share is that I’m single [winks]. But I suppose it’s also worth mentioning, more on the wrestling side of things, that my two recruits only have one match under their belts as of now and are itching to get even more. My trainer especially is looking for someone big enough and man enough to toss him around. Keep in mind, he’s 5’11” and 195lbs of solid, hairy beef.

Bard: Well I hope you’re single because you chose to be, because otherwise, that’s just bat shit crazy. Next interview, we’ll have to explore in more detail what qualifications it would take to get your hot ass off the market. Just to make neverland readers hate me a little (more?), let me point out that I’m looking at a photo of your personal trainer right now and swooning… a lot. However, I will honor your request not to post this photo of one of the meatiest, muscliest, hairiest cuts of prime beef I’ve seen flexing in a long, long time. I hope you’ll keep us posted about your ongoing adventures in homoerotic wrestling and recruiting. I’m following you on Twitter, and I’m crossing my fingers, hoping you start blogging on your adventures soon!

Ben: I will try to start up a blog ASAP. For now, time for me to get my winter boots out! It’s snowing here in Montreal! Have a good one Bard and we’ll talk again soon.

Ben beats the cold with memories of hot times at BG East!

"Kids these days…"

I’m enjoying a rare opporuntity I have to thumb through my archives and pull out some homoerotic wrestling gems that I didn’t have time to fully appreciate when I got my hands on them in busier days.  Take, for example, BG East’s Matmen 23, featuring two friends of this blog, Kid Karisma and Skip Vance, making sweet, sweet music in a certain Florida sunroom.

Kid Karisma can’t wait to get his hands on Skip’s “cute” hair.

“Um, elementary school is the other block,” Kid Karisma smirks when achingly adorable Skip Vance struts onto the mat with an eager grin stretched ear-to-ear.  Despite Skip giving up 35 pounds to his muscle bulging opponent, it’s not hard to understand that big smile.  I know of dozens of fans who would stand in line all night for some alone time with Kid K’s muscles.  Sure, you have to assume Skip knows he’s going to get bashed.  In addition to being one of the best jobbers on the planet (I’m buying anything and everything this boy sells!), he also clearly gets major kicks out of taking a beating.  All arrows are aligned in one direction that entirely explains Skip’s shit-eating grin: Kid K’s stunning body, soul-crushing ego, and erotically charged wrestling style are perfectly tuned to Skip’s fondest fantasies.

Kid K puts Skip in one compromising position after another

“You think I’m scared of you, big boy!?” Skip laughs.  “Do I look scared!?”  No, Skip does not look scared.  Skip’s charm is exactly that.  Look vulnerable?  Absolutely.  Mouthwatering?  Definitely.  Scared? Not for an instant.  When Kid K refuses to take him seriously, Skip dials up the heat another notch.  “Are you ready to get your ass beaten?”

Skip’s got Kid K right where he wants him!

Yep, I’m with Skip.  It’s hard to consider a Kid Karisma match for more than about 5 seconds before remarking on his ass.  It is AMAZING.  It’s almost certainly the glimpse of that thong underneath his trunks, visible where his ass crack cannot be covered by the outmatched black fabric, that makes Skip blurt out in the middle of his beating, “Fuck you, dude! If you wasn’t so sexy…” What, Skip?  You’d enjoy the complete demolition you’re suffering a shade less?  But more pertinently, I find it highly erotic and refreshing for wrestlers to acknowledge the cold/hot, hard facts, like saying out loud the most obvious-yet-unspoken fact that Kid Karisma is wildly sexy!

“Scream LOUDER, boy!”

For all his ego crushing taunting, Kid K points out his own highly erotic facts, as well, referring to achingly adorable, innocent-looking Skip as incredibly “cute.”  Of course, Kid K says the word “cute” with a lip-curling sneer and seems to feed off of his contempt for adorability to fuel an incredibly hot session of complete, humiliating domination.  “Scream louder!” he demands at one point, with his rugby thighs squeezing tightly around Skip’s narrow waist.  “Scream LOUDER, boy!!!” he roars, bearing down harder with his scissors and crushing out Skip’s wailing obedience.

“Can you see these abs, or is my cock in the way?”

Skip spends a whole lot of time flat on his back in repeated Kid Karisma schoolboy pins.  In the 3rd (or 20th) time, Kid K flexes his gorgeous guns and then runs his fingers down his washboard.  “Can you see these abs, or is my cock in the way!?,” he asks before crawling his hands forward across the mat and grinding his crotch into Skip’s trapped face.  Feel sorry for Skip?  Don’t.  Most moments like this, even when he’s clearly choking on the pain, that shit-eating grin is still plastered across the lucky kid’s face.  “Kid’s these days,” Kid K marvels at Skip’s obvious relish for soaking up punishment.

Skip momentarily obeys

It’s not a 100% Kid Karisma offensive match.  After Skip obeys his opponent’s command to peel off Kid K’s black trunks to reveal the “surprise” underneath (packaged in a leopard print thong), Skip reaches up and claws the karismatic one’s pouch viciously, bringing the bully to his knees in agony.  Skip still has enough in his tanks to put the pedal to the metal and make the most of Kid K’s breathlessness.  He folds him up in a gorgeous ass-to-ceiling small package, pinning Kid K’s ankles to the mat above his head.  “Is that all you got now!?” Skip demands, delighting in spanking that glorious ass.  “You smell that, fucker!?” he snarls, grinding his crotch in Kid K’s face in retribution for the karismatic indignities suffered earlier.

“I said LOOK!”

This match opens up a fascinating side to Kid Karisma that I haven’t noticed before.  It was probably there all along, but it didn’t grab me before this match.  Kid K wants, nay, needs to have a witness to his stunning beauty and power.  “Look at this,” he demands in yet another schoolboy pin, flexing his powerful biceps.  Skip doesn’t respond quickly enough, so Kid K grabs his head and yanks it off the mat to give him a closer look.  “I said, LOOK!” he barks.

Skip can’t take his eyes off of Kid Karisma’s “best” side

“I’m looking! I see it! I like it!” Skip sputters back obediently.  Later, Kid K spreads his awesome lats and turns his, arguably, best side toward his opponent as Skip struggles to peel himself off the mat after giving away yet another submission.  “Do you see that?” Kid K asks, looking over his shoulder.  Skip is just trying to shake the cobwebs from his rattled brain.  “I asked if you were LOOKING AT ME!” Kid K threatens.  “I see it!  I see it!” Skip pleads.

“Do you like that? To feel those arms around you?”

An exquisite rear bearhug shows off both Kid K’s power and Skip’s vulnerability and sell.  Kid K lifts him entirely off his feet and marches him around the mat for days, crushing him and owning him completely. “Do you like that!? To feel those arms around you?” Kid K wants to know.

My personal favorite Kid K maneuver

A late inverted bearhug from the karismatic one leaves him open for a suspended headscissors from Skip’s always dangerous legs, combined with another vicious ball claw that drops Kid K to his knees again.  But Skip is far too wasted by this point to do anything at all with the momentary advantage.  Kid K is back on his feet and locking down another in a series of standing scissors (my personal favorite Kid K torture device!) to make Skip howl in agony while leaving Kid K’s arms free to flex and admire himself in the mirror.

The perfect pin

A figure-4 choke caps off 8 unanswered submissions that Kid K racks up, but really, the last 10 minutes or so are pretty much one long series of Skip slamming face-first into that wall.  Kid K drags the lucky, lucky jobber across the mat, smothers him with his crotch, and slaps down a 10 count final fall victory.  He admires his handiwork by flexing for the mirror with his boot grinding into Skip’s crotch, but Skip’s too far out of it to even flinch.  The karismatic victor claims Skip’s lost trunks as a trophy, but then reconsiders.  On one knee, he leans in and plants his mouth across the slack lips of his beaten opponent.  Slowly (it’s almost a half a minute of face sucking), Skip rouses in what has got to be the absolute best way to wake up in the history of waking up.  Hell, if you’re going to take his trunks, why not just toss the adorably ripped jobber over your shoulder and take him as the sweetest trophy of all?

Best way to wake up ever invented!

Wow, wow, wow.  There’s much, much more to enjoy in this match than even this major league spoiler details.  Sign me up for the petition to see a follow-up three-way (let’s be honest, 2-on-1) between Kid Karisma, Skip Vance, and Skip’s lover, Christian Taylor.  And in the mean time, beautiful work boys, and no wonder Kid K remains at the very top of my list of favorite homoerotic wrestlers!

Talk about a trophy!

Winning the Hard Way

Jake Jenkins is stunning to watch use those muscles to choke out Eli Black

Sometimes I think of myself as a homoerotic wrestling kink therapist.  I often hear from wrestling fans who have questions and problems they want solved with regard to homoerotic wrestling.  “Tell BG East to…” or “Why does Rock Hard Wrestling always…?” And not uncommonly, I get messages from readers who tell me that they “just need to vent.”  For example, a reader and homoerotic wrestling fan recently “vented” to me in an email regarding a recurring frustration.  Like me, he’s a major Jake Jenkins fan. And like me, he enjoys watching Jake kick ass.  So when he sees a lot of JJ’s new releases in which the stud puppy clearly gets squashed, he’s irritated.  This reader knows my recurring answer to these types of questions: tastes vary.  Some of us likely get more kink for the buck to see a hot muscle kid like JJ dominated, while others of us get a harder push over the edge by watching handsome Jake on the conquering in of the equation.  But this reader still questions what makes those on “the other side” tick, and what makes them want to see more and more of JJ getting owned.

Jake goes down in a puddle of sweat beneath a victorious Kid Karisma

This exchange brought to mind a similar brief correspondence I had with a reader several months ago, who asked me to exercise influence over Steel Muscle God to convince him to tape some wrestling action in which the godly one gets dominated.  This is hardly the first time someone has vastly overestimated my influence. And it’s actually not the first time I’ve heard this particular plea.  Personally, I LOVE watching SMG totally use an opponent, particularly one of those hot muscleboys he’s pummeled lately.  There’s an absolutely intoxicating scene in SMG’s recent release of a ring “bout” in which he repeatedly sleepers a hot, hard hunk.  He puts the fiesty stud out flat on this stomach, and I’m 110% on board with the sell that this is an actual choke out.  The hunk goes limp like a noodle.  And when SMG shakes and shoves him and rolls him over, the hottie looks absolutely out cold.  SMG prods and pokes the unresisting hunk, standing over top of him and flexing his guns, leering down into his slack face, until finally after a half a minute or so, the vulnerable hunk of meat comes to.  Fuck me there something so erotic about that little exchange!

Steel Muscle God wreaks divine justice all over another hot muscle buddy

But ripping myself back to my topic for today.  Some readers have repeatedly complained that SMG “always wins.”  Why doesn’t he star in a muscleboy-in-trouble-scenario for those desperately waiting for him to stroke that g-spot where many fans get topped off by the powerful muscle stud shocked, laid out and humiliated?  For the record, SMG has said that he does have a wrestling match in which he “loses,” but I haven’t actually seen it (I think you have to buy it separately from the membership site, and I’m too frugal).  But the issue seems to be repeated from many of my kink therapy clients: “my getting off on a homoerotic wrestling match requires that my primary object of lust win (or lose).”

Brad Rochelle wrote the book in making a muscleboy loser epically homoerotic.

And both of these conversations call to mind still another set of exchanges I’ve had with a long-time commentator and avid student of homoerotic wrestling who more than once has chided me that I’m too focused on who wins and who loses.  What tweaks the subconscious wrestling kink, he argues, is almost entirely unrelated to specifically whose shoulders are pinned to the mat or which hunk sobs, “I give!”  The passion play that homoerotic wrestling presents us is about themes broader than the specific “winner” or “loser,” like broken egos, revenge on bullies, the battle of might versus right, or our personal secret longings to be dominated or to dominate.  And, this commentator has also argued, it’s about much more specific elements than the literal “win” as well, such as the particular sell of suffering, how persuasively we’re sucked into longing to see someone punished, the precise angle at which a wrestler’s lower back is pried backward in a Boston crab that convinces us he’s hurting while simultaneously displaying is gorgeous body and bulging package so tantalizingly.  There’s definitely the school of thought that literal “winning” and “losing” is almost entirely beside the point.

Brad Rochelle also looks GORGEOUS milking victory out of Patrick Donovan’s withering body!

I’ve pushed back against that hard line.  I think the drama of coming out on top is very central to what strokes my homoerotic wrestling kink.  The notion of two powerful men, both fully expecting to be top-stud as they climb into the ring is precisely the tension that thrills me.  One of them will end up defeated, knocked down a peg, put in his place, while the other will stride out of the ring victorious, top dog, in control.  Turn this into a non-competitive, everybody wins, nobody loses, passionless dance of pretty bodies, and I might as well be watching a yoga class, which even when the bodies are smoking hot, it’ll never do for me what a hot wrestling match does.

Pectacular Patrick Donovan also looks dizzyingly hot slapping down a humiliating victory all over Z-Man’s  beautifully vulnerable muscle-bod.

And then there’s one last mental association I’m having with all of this talk of winners and losers. At the BGE Headquarters discussion group, someone who has frequently commented on this blog wrote a seemingly straightforward opinion, suggesting that he’d prefer the initial photo galleries in the membership site of BGE not “give away” which wrestler wins and which one loses.  He suggested that he’d prefer to maintain the suspense, particularly for those matches that he’s planning on purchasing.  Give him enough time to get the new release shipped to him before revealing who ends up top dog.

Z-Man can also delight in victory as he rips apart loser muscle boy Brody Hancock

Personally, I think this sounds entirely reasonable and well-reasoned.  However, another commentator left a bizarrely mismatched diatribe mocking anyone who could “believe these matches aren’t fake.” This commentator prejudices his own oddly aggressive response by tying them to appalling politics, but my point is actually not his apparent political self-hatred.  My point is really that he misses the point entirely.  The point is not how choreographed wrestling-for-pay may be in any given example.  The question of wanting to milk the suspense of not knowing who wins is wholly unrelated to whether the wrestlers or promoters are staging the matches as melodramas rather than as Olympic sport.  It seems to me that the investment many of us have in winners or losers in homoerotic wrestling is entirely about how wrestling speaks directly to our erotic fantasies, not some “objective” evaluation of who, in a fair fight, would kick whose ass.

Babyface Brody Hancock also make victory look so, so sexual when he puts magically nippled muscle hunk Cody Nelson on his back for good.

Suspense, anticipation, the establishment of tension in the plot, the development of compelling characters who establish motivation and commit to their particular roles… these are essential elements of satisfying homoerotic wrestling as far as I’m concerned.  However much a pretense it appears in any given match, the context of combat is a core component of what turns me on and tops me off as a homoerotic wrestling fan.  It isn’t so much who would win in an actual barroom brawl (not at all, really), but who tells a provocative story about passion and heat, power and strength, skill and strategy, muscle and beauty, and, without a doubt, winning and losing.

Sweat soaked and savoring victory, Cody Nelson titillates musclebully fans when he crushes handsome, lanky, lovely Christian Taylor aka Chris Cox.

So why do some JJ fans never seem to get tired of seeing him humiliated and defeated?  Why are others desperate to watch him use those gorgeous muscles of his to pick apart and make another hunk his bitch?  How are some fans filled up on a steady diet of SteelMuscleGod owning one opponent after another, while others are insanely aching to see SMG crushed and dominated?  I think this state of affairs is simply the landscape in which we live as homoerotic wrestling fans.  Our fantasies vary, even as we share a common passion for the eroticism of wrestling drama. It seems clear to me that winning and losing is far from beside the point, and who wins and who loses is directly and intimately tied to what strokes many of us hardest.  It’s not that we’re naively buying into the competitive pretense of wrestling-for-pay. I for one love watching Olympic wrestling, but the hottest amateur match is only a fraction as sexy as even the average homoerotic wrestling product as far as I’m concerned.  Explicitly homoerotic wrestling is much bigger than the raw rules and tests of strength and skill of amateurs, and more importantly, the point is entirely different.  The point of amateur wrestling is entirely winning and losing.  But the point of homoerotic wrestling is to get you and me off, and while it’s not the whole story, the drama of winning and losing is one of the elements that makes wrestling the kink that defines me (and many of you!).

For my tastes, Christian never looked hotter than when he brutalized his lover and rumored-to-be tag team partner Skip Vance, tying together homo, erotic, and wrestling in as beautiful a bow as any victory ever has!

A Very Karismatic Birthday

Kid Karisma is begging for a spanking!
Not so long ago on this day of the year, a bouncing, baby Kid Karisma was born into the world. My, oh my, didn’t he grow up well!!!?
Kid K knows what you’re looking at!
The birthday boy has owned the top spot in my favorite homoerotic wrestler rankings for quite a while now, in no small part due to his birthday greeting to me a few months back.  The karismatic one extremely considerately assured me that, were I within reach, he’d spank my ass raw in honor of the special occasion.  Now that’s what I call a birthday wish!

Go ahead. I dare you.  Spank it.

An incredibly generous friend of this blog, Kid K has fueled the fantasies of neverland readers not only with his astonishingly hot homoerotic wrestling resume, but also with his generous sharing of candid behind-the-scenes pics of the partying that he and the other BG East wrestlers get up to after they’ve sorted out who’s on top in the ring and on the mat.

You know you wanna… go ahead and try it…

Kid K is a favorite around these parts not only for his excellent PR skills, of course.  His wrestling thrills me to core.  The same irreverent, justifiably cocky attitude that comes through in my interview with him is evident in every single match. He’s out to have fun… always… and the fact that he gets a kick out of stalking, taking down, dominating and humiliating his opponents is just a happy coincidence for you and me.

Kid K’s idea of a good time (my idea of a heavenly time!)

I wish there was more, and more varied, personality in homoerotic wrestling in general.  It’s a relatively rare wrestler who gives more than a snarl and an oddly fragile ego desperately in need of defense.  The wrestlers who break that mold tend to be the ones who grab my attention and rise in the ranks of my favorites, and Kid Karisma obliterates “the mold” every time he appears on camera.  I think every Kid K match I’ve seen includes him laughing… not a villainous, self-congratulatory stage laugh, but a genuinely amused laugh as some moment in the match actually tickles him.  Sure, the humorous moment is almost always at the expense of his opponent’s dignity, but my point stands.  Kid K is having a good time, whether he’s planting his world class ass on some lucky bastard’s face or making some gorgeous stud whimper like a baby with his head trapped between Kid K’s rugby-built quads.

A bubble-muscle-butt in a class of it’s own!

Oh, yeah, and then there’s that ass!  I swear I have to restrain myself from waxing poetic about Kid Karisma’s superhuman glutes in order to talk about anything else.  In my interview with him, Kid K admitted that his ass is, by far, his most appreciated feature.  He also clarified, should some severely myopic critic fail to recognize his incredible level of fitness from head to toe, that those glutes are 100% muscle!

Art.
My birthday wish for Kid Karisma is that someone is slapping that world class ass mercilessly, precisely 26  times, plus one to grow on before today is done.  To any of his personal friends out there, I’ll pay money for a pic of a bright red handprint pounded 27 times on one of those fantastic cheeks!
Rugby, wrestling, triathlon training… it does a body good!

I also hope today brings the birthday boy a lot of love, happiness, and a healthy dose of full contact erotic combat to top him off.  And yet again let me just put it out there: if ANYONE has a rumored pic of our favorite freckle-faced, red-headed muscle stud passed out oh-so-vulnerably after a night of partying with wild abandon, contact me immediately.  We need to talk.

All the evidence of a life well lived!

I know for a fact that Kid Karisma occasionally reads this blog.  He doesn’t strike me as the sort of hunk that needs a lot of ego stroking or fawning adoration (which, I’m the first to admit, is exactly what my comments about him generally qualify as).  But rather, he seems to genuinely appreciate his fans, and he holds a genuine appreciation for just how hot homoerotic wrestling can be for those of us so inclined.

The birthday boy knows that you like!
So if you’ve got a birthday wish you’d like to pass along, you might consider leaving it in a comment below.  I’ll make sure Kid Karisma gets the word that there are a whole lot of us who would like it to be known that we’re awfully, awfully happy that he’s in the world and doing exactly what he does best!
God bless America!

Happy Birthday, Kid Karisma!

Cross-Pollinating

Joe’s post this morning was serendipitous.  As is so often the case, right about the time something occurs to me regarding homoerotic wrestling, Joe has just posted on the topic.  In this case, I was even thinking of the phrase “cross-pollination,” as I reflected on the tempting allure of playing the game “what-if” with the chess pieces of homoerotic wrestlers from different production companies.  Regular readers will be quick to point out that I’ve bemoaned too much of a good thing in the past.  I’ve been quick to complain about “over-exposure” of wrestlers appearing everywhere at once, showing up simultaneously featured in new releases by competing productions.  But if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times: I see no virtue in constancy, and like so many great men before me, I’m willing to allow that my opinions on important subjects “evolve.”  Whether today’s post is evolution or merely me reveling in my own self-contraditions, only time will tell.  However here’s my theme for today, picking up on Joe’s introduction of the topic of cross-pollination: which brand-loyal (for now) homoerotic wrestlers would I most like to see matched up against each other in cross-production matches?  Considering only the boys who I’ve only seen (or remember) wrestling for one and only one homoerotic wrestling company, here are the dream matches that are making me reconsider the moral good of cross-pollinating wrestlers.

Austin Wolf (6’4″, 235 lbs) v Diego Diaz (6’3″, 185 lbs)

For example, my first pairing for this mental exercise is the hypothetical match that really started me down this path.  Thunder’s Arena has a new stunningly handsome muscle giant by the name of Austin Wolf who grabs me with both hands and turns my crank hard! Wow, just… wow.  His dismantling of fellow Thunder’s rookie Hooper absolutely enthralls me.  It’s a catchweight scenario. Little Hoop is just fucked from the moment he walks on the mat and looks up, up, up at the bottom of Wolf’s chin towering over him.  Wolf’s look completely delights me.  A big, long, giant of a man who can pack on aesthetically luscious muscle mass is just priceless.  And that’s when it hits me.  Austin Wolf will never be fully realized in my mind until he climbs into the ring against BG East Latino beauty Diego Diaz.  I have no idea what would happen next.  Although essentially eye-to-eye, Diego is giving up a reported (but I’m skeptical) 50 pounds, though his conditioning looks far superior to Wolf’s.  I have a hunch that Austin Wolf would not be tossing around Diego like a sack of potatoes!

Archer (5’9″, 150 lbs) v Michael Vineland (??)
Another Thunder’s exclusive who demands a double-take from me everytime I run across an image of him is tatted young muscle stud, Archer.  This boy can sweat, and I could spend days studying every carved, cut muscle on his gorgeous body… with my tongue.  I swear this kid does to me what Brad Rochelle did to me the first time I saw him on the splash page of BG East.  Fun and games and fratboy hijinks will surely keep me tuning in for more of Archer at Thunders, but holy hell in a hand basket, just imagine this mouthwatering kid climbing into the Pro Sex Fight ring with Can-Am exclusive, Michael Vineland. There’s some inevitability about that match-up.  For example, at some point devastatingly handsome Archer is going to be sniffing balls with his head trapped in a long, slow face-to-crotch headscissors between Michael’s incredibly huge quads.  And there’s no way Archer won’t, at some point, be tied in the ropes in the corner and getting his sweat soaked muscles alternately stroked and pummeled, most likely with his cock and balls hanging out the front of his trunks.  And sure, someone’s getting fucked, and most likely he’ll return the favor.  But still, the journey along the way with these two would absolutely demand me pull my wallet out.
Victor Paz (6’2″, 172 lbs) v Jimmy Clay (??)
Two more brand loyalists (as far as I know, please correct me if I’m wrong!) that I’d love, love, love to see “cross-pollinate” are BG East rookie Victor Paz and Can-Am sex fighter, Jimmy Clay.  Jimmy talks a good game and has a lovely body, but he’s more pornboy than homoerotic wrestler.  That fact is precisely what makes me absolutely ache to see him step onto the mat against laser-focused MMA hardbody, Victor.  Jimmy would be all about the camera angles (which I’m not knocking him, mind you… a boy who thinks about precisely how sexy this will look on camera is golden in my book).  He might get some early offense, locking up Victor in a sloppy headlock.  But the shitstorm that would rage all over Jimmy’s fratboy porn-body for the next 45 minutes would be absolutely epic! Victor nearly took down Eli Black with legitimate skill, stamina, and strength against a wrestler who epitomizes all three of those!  Poserboy Jimmy?  Holy hell.  But if anyone could grind his ass into Victor’s crotch and get a rise out of the stunning MMA stud, I’m betting Jimmy could make a mat loss turn into a win-win-win (that last win is for me and you) scenario with Victor.
Lon Dumont (5’7″, 150 lbs) v Coupe (6’1″, 215 lbs)
BG East fixture, Lon Dumont + Thunder’s Arena goofy boy: Coupe = Match made in heaven.  Both of these hardbodied hunks are competitive bodybuilders.  They both inspire infinite wrestling fantasies that keep me sated in between actually watching their respective matches.  Lon is not a man who suffers fools lightly, and Coupe, at least in the context of Thunder’s is the classic medieval fool: jokester, self-depracating, silly, out for a laugh.  Now put these two great tastes together, preferably in the ring, and you’ve got muscle bashing beauty with stamina to keep wrestling for days and days!  While Coupe is a half a foot taller and around 65 pounds heavier than Lon, there’s no way in hell that he’s coming out with any shred of dignity left.  The relentless destruction Lon would rain down would be infinitely varied and delivered with the precision and perfection of a consummate professional.  Exactly how it would go down, I’m not sure, but I strongly suspect 2 things: Coupe tied up in the ropes and Coupe balling like a baby.
Cratos (5’9″, 200 lbs) v Kid Karisma (5’8″, 170 lbs)
My reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month, Cratos, looks incredibly familiar to me, but for the life of me I can’t place where I may have seen this hot and handsome hunk before.  So as far as I know, he qualifies as a Thunder’s exclusive and eligible for this little game I’m playing today.  What brand-loyal wrestler from another company would be my ideal to meet Cratos and do some cross-pollinating?  I can’t think of a more perfect opponent for my reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month than my reigning overall favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy, BG East’s exclusively, Kid Karisma.  I’m picturing Kid K welcoming Cratos to his first ring match.  I’m also picturing Cratos totally indignant at the raging ego and contemptuous disdain that oozes from Kid K’s every pore.  I’m also picturing this as a serious battle of muscle and determination.  Details? I have no idea, which is what makes this such a fantastically provocative pairing.  However, I have to believe, right near the end, we’d see the karismatic one’s crotch planted across Cratos lips.  Prove me wrong, Cratos.  Prove me wrong!
Tyrell Tomsen (5’11, 185 lbs) v Alexi Ivanov (6′, 170 lbs)

The final pairing that occurred to me was BG East’s resident adonis, Tyrell Tomsen, facing the Russian battleboy, Rock Hard Wrestling’s exclusive, Alexi Ivanov.  Again, both of these men rock me hard, although in different ways.  Tyrell is just a fucking god, full stop.  I think if I ever actually met this man in person, I’d melt away in a pool of mindless lust.  Alexi, on the other hand, compels me from a different angle.  He’s got a drive and personality that keep me tuning into watch him despite his lackluster performances thus far in the ring.  There’s story in his eyes that begs for more definition and attention, and putting him in the ring with the chiseled muscle god Tyrell seems to me to be a beautiful intervention to aid Alexi’s full emergence into the world of homoerotic wrestling.  Don’t even think this is anything but a rip ‘n’ strip match.  And you know that lovely, rippled, lean Alexi is going to spend hours racked across Tyrell’s thigh in an OTK backbreaker (or 20).  But possibly, just maybe, the divine beauty of Tyrell bashing him from corner to corner might just awaken within Alexi the Drago-within, because you and I also know that this kid is a genetically engineered erotic-wrestling-sleeper-cell left over from the cold war and surely and inevitably designed to go nuts all over some entirely naked muscle boy (aka, Tyrell) and own his ebony body tied up in the ropes and tortured to exquisite perfection.  I swear, that’s all inside Alexi’s hot-yet-wooden wrestling body, just waiting to explode all over Tyrell’s bulging pecs.

Who are the brand loyal battle boys you’d like to see cross-pollinate all over each other?