Homoerotic Wrestler of the Year

Hopefully we’ll have an opportunity to vote on the BG East year end Bestie awards soon. In the mean time, I made my own selections of the wrestlers that grabbed me hardest month by month (I skipped a couple months because life just keeps me from it every so often). My homoerotic wrestler of the month title is a difficult call to make most months. I’m turned on by so much of the fine new releases that I enjoy on a regular basis. But of the matches I’ve seen, the HWOTM title gives me a short list of the wrestlers I enjoyed most over the year.

Not that these are necessarily my top picks of the year.  There’s probably some way to do a statistical analysis on the between group versus within group variances (Jose can probably tell us). Some months may present a tighter, higher caliber field than others to choose from, so a “loser” on any given month might have beat the fuck out of a winner in a different month.  But I think my top wrestler in a new release in 2015 is guaranteed to be among the 10 HWOTM I called out this year, even if the runner-up might not be.

Anyhow, statistics and logic problems aside, before I can talk about the 10 HWOTM title holders in 2015, I need to anoint a December title holder.  It’s a day early, but I’m going ahead and calling the competition for which wrestler turned me on hardest in a December new release. The last piece of the puzzle and the reigning HWOTM as we move into the new year is…

 

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…big, bulging, buff, beautiful, blond, babyface, blue-eyed beefcake, Biff Farrell.

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Biff turns thoughtful sizing up the competition.

Frankly, it was a very close call as to whether it was Biff or his opponent, the titular character in The Comeback 2: Joe Mazetti, who turned me on hardest. Joe gets the nostalgia vote, and he sensationally sells the story of a classic heel who can’t, despite his best intentions, turn over the new leaf he so much longs to. Just the thrill of getting to see Joe looking so fucking huge, fit, and fierce is incredibly satisfying, much less getting to see Joe wrestle like he never left the ring in the first place.

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Biff savors the taste of making a man suffer between his thighs.

But Biff narrowly rips the title out of Joe’s hands the moment he drops the heel daddy with a sucker shot to the gut and lords it all over a writhing, wriggling Joe, laughing and sneering with Joe’s nogging crushed like a tin can between Biff’s gargantuan thighs. This is a whole new Biff. This is a hungry, brutal, vicious Biff, with a big, bulging sadistic button sticking out and snarling Joe punching that button with abandon.

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Biff roars to life in The Comeback 2

Biff is such an impressive hunk of man. It’s a joy, and just a little relief, to see his personality come through as 3-D as his bulging, beautiful muscles do. True, the Comeback king puts the buff kid out cold before all is said and done, but it’s that contemptuous, sadistic streak shining through in Biff’s riding time that makes me take a 2nd, 3rd, and 4th look at him as officially graduating from the ranks of the rookies. He plays with and plays off Joe’s larger than life delivery. Gorgeous as fuck, built like a brick house, and now with character complexity and suspense, Biff came on way, way strong to finish 2015.

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Biff Farrell is the total package and my homoerotic wrestler of the month.

So somewhere in the pack of my 2015 HWOTM winners, there must be a homoerotic wrestler of the year (HWOTY).  I know these are my picks, and it’s all about who turned me on month to month, but seriously, I want to know. Who do you think should be neverland’s HWOTY? Just to warm up for the BG East Besties, vote below for the neverland homoerotic wrestler of the year.

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February 2015 – Jonny Firestorm in BG East’s Fan Fantasy 2
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March 2015 – Stefan Ramos in Muscle Domination Wrestling’s Six Pack Bash 7
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April 2015 – Lon Dumont starring in BG East’s Wrestler Spotlight: Lon Dumont
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May 2015 – Marco starring in Thunder’s Arena’s Mat Wars 47
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June 2015 – Marco Carlow starring in BG East’s Undagear 23
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July 2015 – Ty Alexander starring in Jonny Firestorm’s Custom Combat
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August 2015 – Logan Vaughn starring in BG East’s Florida Fights 5
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October 2015 – Kayden Keller starring in BG East’s Ring Releases 2
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November 2015 – Eagle starring Thunder’s Arena’s exclusive Black Friday release of Frey vs. Eagle
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December 2015 – Biff Farrell starring in BG East’s The Comeback 2: Joe Mazetti.

5 thoughts on “Homoerotic Wrestler of the Year

  1. Such a hard choice. Being a bgeast fan, it’s down to two for me. One guy I’d love to throw around the ring and one I’d love to have throw me around.

    Had to go for tall, dark and heelsome. Mr. Keller. (Sorry Ty but it was close 🙂 )

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