Author: wrestlebard

I'm a gay man with an active imagination.

Breaking News…

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There’s wildly exciting breaking news happening in the world of homoerotic wrestling.  First of all, BG East’s catalog 95 dropped yesterday.  It always feels a little like Christmas morning when the BG East catalog comes out.   This time around is no exception.  Let’s just run down the front runners for homoerotic wrestler of the month, which is, of course, the list of former homoerotic wrestlers of the month appearing in 95:
Dick Rick looks thrilled to get his hands on gorgeous Z-Man!
The Z-Man has a date with destiny against legit pro heel Dick Rick.  Dick’s expert hands on Z’s perfect physique!? Holy hell…
Cameron Mathews is feeling it as he stretches out lean rookie Ray Naylor
Cameron 2.0 is ripped to shreds and down to his underwear against a ripped, long, lean rookie in Undagear 19.  Damn, Cam’s body rocks, rocks, ROCKS!
The Enforcer muscles golden Maskador into position
Former homoerotic wrestler of the month Enforcer faces off (and clearly is turned on) by a definitely familiar physique in golden muscle stud, Maskador.
Gold Mantis about to be consumed by Cage Thunder
AND former homoerotic wrestler of the month Cage Thunder is on the same collection completely terrorizing a horrified, hardbodied rookie!
Beautiful Denny Cartier digs deep against rival HWOTM alum, Aryx Quinn
Denny Cartier is a former HWOTM appearing twice on Leopard’s Lair 4  (3 times, really, if you count the mat match and ring match against Aryx separately), against fellow former HWOTM, Aryx Quinn and how-has-this-kid-not-been-homoerotic-wrestler-of-the-month Russian muscle god sexy Alexi Adamov!
Former HWOTM Jonny Firestorm does things to fellow former HWOTM Jake Jenkins that must be seen to be believed!
And finally, two former homoerotic wrestlers of the month go toe-to-toe when Jonny Firestorm appears to OWN Jake Jenkins’ luscious body in Jobberpaloozer 12: the Works!
So many stellar studs who’ve already proven that they’ve got the goods to command my lustful loyalty! And that doesn’t even scratch the surface of the depth of wrestling fantasy men in these new releases.  All signs suggest that BG East has put together another barnburner collection of scorching hot wrestling hunks to appeal to the varied and distinguishing tastes of wrestling kink fans!
And in another late breaking news flash, as Joe broke last night, a personal favorite fighter of both his and mine is generating buzz for his brand new fight sponsorship by asking, nay, demanding that everyone buy a shirt (or twenty) that supports his MMA career development.  Like Joe, I’m eager to support this hot young commodity, and like Joe I’ve already ordered my shirt.  You should, too, because there’s a fiercely dangerous young hot-head who you do NOT want to disappoint, waiting and watching for you to purchase one of his merchandise!

The Italian Job

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I’m delighted to report that I have pieces of homoerotic wrestling fiction piling up around me! First off the top of the pile is a sweetly poignant pro-wrestlers-turned-homoerotic-objects-of-lust chapter from Alex’ “AWL” series.  You know the primary protagonist: babyface jobber with a heart of gold and a body of beef, Danny Chase.

Danny seems always just a fraction behind the curve at all times.  I suppose not all professional wrestlers are rocket scientists, though one of my very favorite personal fantasies is when they’ve got the brains to match the brawn.  Danny, however, is more big-hearted than sharp-witted, and events frequently take him by surprise and require him to think on them long and hard before he manages to figure out which end is up.

In this case, the main mystery has to do with his best buddy, Rex Taylor.  You’ll remember it was Rex who introduced Danny to the lucrative side hustle of the “Men’s Wrestling Alliance,” where the hottest pros go to moonlight for the type of guys who get off on the homoeroticism of wrestling (you may be familiar with the concept).

The two new muscle beasts that make this story so delightful are a couple of Italian power houses.  The Italians are brutal, merciless, and built like Roman gods, which is how I like to imagine all Italians are.  When he finds these guys in Rex’ face, Danny can’t figure out what their angle is.  The action reaches the ring (thank god), and there’s something oddly compelling for me about the Italians and their commitment to the “rules of the ring.” Fantastic story again from Alex.  Check it out by signing up for the Sidelineland group, and contribute your own original works of homoerotic wrestling fiction as well!

Cross-Pollinating

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Joe’s post this morning was serendipitous.  As is so often the case, right about the time something occurs to me regarding homoerotic wrestling, Joe has just posted on the topic.  In this case, I was even thinking of the phrase “cross-pollination,” as I reflected on the tempting allure of playing the game “what-if” with the chess pieces of homoerotic wrestlers from different production companies.  Regular readers will be quick to point out that I’ve bemoaned too much of a good thing in the past.  I’ve been quick to complain about “over-exposure” of wrestlers appearing everywhere at once, showing up simultaneously featured in new releases by competing productions.  But if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times: I see no virtue in constancy, and like so many great men before me, I’m willing to allow that my opinions on important subjects “evolve.”  Whether today’s post is evolution or merely me reveling in my own self-contraditions, only time will tell.  However here’s my theme for today, picking up on Joe’s introduction of the topic of cross-pollination: which brand-loyal (for now) homoerotic wrestlers would I most like to see matched up against each other in cross-production matches?  Considering only the boys who I’ve only seen (or remember) wrestling for one and only one homoerotic wrestling company, here are the dream matches that are making me reconsider the moral good of cross-pollinating wrestlers.

Austin Wolf (6’4″, 235 lbs) v Diego Diaz (6’3″, 185 lbs)

For example, my first pairing for this mental exercise is the hypothetical match that really started me down this path.  Thunder’s Arena has a new stunningly handsome muscle giant by the name of Austin Wolf who grabs me with both hands and turns my crank hard! Wow, just… wow.  His dismantling of fellow Thunder’s rookie Hooper absolutely enthralls me.  It’s a catchweight scenario. Little Hoop is just fucked from the moment he walks on the mat and looks up, up, up at the bottom of Wolf’s chin towering over him.  Wolf’s look completely delights me.  A big, long, giant of a man who can pack on aesthetically luscious muscle mass is just priceless.  And that’s when it hits me.  Austin Wolf will never be fully realized in my mind until he climbs into the ring against BG East Latino beauty Diego Diaz.  I have no idea what would happen next.  Although essentially eye-to-eye, Diego is giving up a reported (but I’m skeptical) 50 pounds, though his conditioning looks far superior to Wolf’s.  I have a hunch that Austin Wolf would not be tossing around Diego like a sack of potatoes!

Archer (5’9″, 150 lbs) v Michael Vineland (??)
Another Thunder’s exclusive who demands a double-take from me everytime I run across an image of him is tatted young muscle stud, Archer.  This boy can sweat, and I could spend days studying every carved, cut muscle on his gorgeous body… with my tongue.  I swear this kid does to me what Brad Rochelle did to me the first time I saw him on the splash page of BG East.  Fun and games and fratboy hijinks will surely keep me tuning in for more of Archer at Thunders, but holy hell in a hand basket, just imagine this mouthwatering kid climbing into the Pro Sex Fight ring with Can-Am exclusive, Michael Vineland. There’s some inevitability about that match-up.  For example, at some point devastatingly handsome Archer is going to be sniffing balls with his head trapped in a long, slow face-to-crotch headscissors between Michael’s incredibly huge quads.  And there’s no way Archer won’t, at some point, be tied in the ropes in the corner and getting his sweat soaked muscles alternately stroked and pummeled, most likely with his cock and balls hanging out the front of his trunks.  And sure, someone’s getting fucked, and most likely he’ll return the favor.  But still, the journey along the way with these two would absolutely demand me pull my wallet out.
Victor Paz (6’2″, 172 lbs) v Jimmy Clay (??)
Two more brand loyalists (as far as I know, please correct me if I’m wrong!) that I’d love, love, love to see “cross-pollinate” are BG East rookie Victor Paz and Can-Am sex fighter, Jimmy Clay.  Jimmy talks a good game and has a lovely body, but he’s more pornboy than homoerotic wrestler.  That fact is precisely what makes me absolutely ache to see him step onto the mat against laser-focused MMA hardbody, Victor.  Jimmy would be all about the camera angles (which I’m not knocking him, mind you… a boy who thinks about precisely how sexy this will look on camera is golden in my book).  He might get some early offense, locking up Victor in a sloppy headlock.  But the shitstorm that would rage all over Jimmy’s fratboy porn-body for the next 45 minutes would be absolutely epic! Victor nearly took down Eli Black with legitimate skill, stamina, and strength against a wrestler who epitomizes all three of those!  Poserboy Jimmy?  Holy hell.  But if anyone could grind his ass into Victor’s crotch and get a rise out of the stunning MMA stud, I’m betting Jimmy could make a mat loss turn into a win-win-win (that last win is for me and you) scenario with Victor.
Lon Dumont (5’7″, 150 lbs) v Coupe (6’1″, 215 lbs)
BG East fixture, Lon Dumont + Thunder’s Arena goofy boy: Coupe = Match made in heaven.  Both of these hardbodied hunks are competitive bodybuilders.  They both inspire infinite wrestling fantasies that keep me sated in between actually watching their respective matches.  Lon is not a man who suffers fools lightly, and Coupe, at least in the context of Thunder’s is the classic medieval fool: jokester, self-depracating, silly, out for a laugh.  Now put these two great tastes together, preferably in the ring, and you’ve got muscle bashing beauty with stamina to keep wrestling for days and days!  While Coupe is a half a foot taller and around 65 pounds heavier than Lon, there’s no way in hell that he’s coming out with any shred of dignity left.  The relentless destruction Lon would rain down would be infinitely varied and delivered with the precision and perfection of a consummate professional.  Exactly how it would go down, I’m not sure, but I strongly suspect 2 things: Coupe tied up in the ropes and Coupe balling like a baby.
Cratos (5’9″, 200 lbs) v Kid Karisma (5’8″, 170 lbs)
My reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month, Cratos, looks incredibly familiar to me, but for the life of me I can’t place where I may have seen this hot and handsome hunk before.  So as far as I know, he qualifies as a Thunder’s exclusive and eligible for this little game I’m playing today.  What brand-loyal wrestler from another company would be my ideal to meet Cratos and do some cross-pollinating?  I can’t think of a more perfect opponent for my reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month than my reigning overall favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy, BG East’s exclusively, Kid Karisma.  I’m picturing Kid K welcoming Cratos to his first ring match.  I’m also picturing Cratos totally indignant at the raging ego and contemptuous disdain that oozes from Kid K’s every pore.  I’m also picturing this as a serious battle of muscle and determination.  Details? I have no idea, which is what makes this such a fantastically provocative pairing.  However, I have to believe, right near the end, we’d see the karismatic one’s crotch planted across Cratos lips.  Prove me wrong, Cratos.  Prove me wrong!
Tyrell Tomsen (5’11, 185 lbs) v Alexi Ivanov (6′, 170 lbs)

The final pairing that occurred to me was BG East’s resident adonis, Tyrell Tomsen, facing the Russian battleboy, Rock Hard Wrestling’s exclusive, Alexi Ivanov.  Again, both of these men rock me hard, although in different ways.  Tyrell is just a fucking god, full stop.  I think if I ever actually met this man in person, I’d melt away in a pool of mindless lust.  Alexi, on the other hand, compels me from a different angle.  He’s got a drive and personality that keep me tuning into watch him despite his lackluster performances thus far in the ring.  There’s story in his eyes that begs for more definition and attention, and putting him in the ring with the chiseled muscle god Tyrell seems to me to be a beautiful intervention to aid Alexi’s full emergence into the world of homoerotic wrestling.  Don’t even think this is anything but a rip ‘n’ strip match.  And you know that lovely, rippled, lean Alexi is going to spend hours racked across Tyrell’s thigh in an OTK backbreaker (or 20).  But possibly, just maybe, the divine beauty of Tyrell bashing him from corner to corner might just awaken within Alexi the Drago-within, because you and I also know that this kid is a genetically engineered erotic-wrestling-sleeper-cell left over from the cold war and surely and inevitably designed to go nuts all over some entirely naked muscle boy (aka, Tyrell) and own his ebony body tied up in the ropes and tortured to exquisite perfection.  I swear, that’s all inside Alexi’s hot-yet-wooden wrestling body, just waiting to explode all over Tyrell’s bulging pecs.

Who are the brand loyal battle boys you’d like to see cross-pollinate all over each other?

Goofy = Sexy

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Ben Monaco (l) demonstrates how a weekend at BGE can turn sexy-silly!

Kid Karisma’s behind-the-scenes photos of  last weekend’s BG East wrestlefest have garnered a lot of attention, including attention from a few of the other hot hunks on hand.  For example, Ben Monaco contacted me a couple of days ago to clarify that he’s not the only sexy battleboy to get a little silly (as was documented by Kid K’s pic of Ben with Gabriel and the karismatic one).

Nothing could make Kid Karisma look anything but sexy as hell!

Turns out Ben has some photographic evidence to illustrate his point. For example, while Kid K seems to almost always be flashing his Blue Steel in his photos, Ben captured my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler hamming it up.  Not his most flattering photo, and yet still somehow the karismatic one remains sexy as hell!

“Jonny, say ‘CHEEEESE!'”
Skip and his “Boston Boyfriend“ Jonny Firestorm look a little surprised to be captured in Ben’s lens.  Jonny’s awkward “say cheese” smile in particular looks goofy.  However 
Work it!  Work it!
Skip manages the unlikely feat of looking Bieberesque while flashing his Blue Steel!  Now that’s a talented professional!
DUDE! lrenzo lowe sittin nxt 2 me NOT WEARING ANY PANTS!!! 
Lorenzo Lowe makes goofy look so, so sexy! This boy seriously needs to show up in the ring wearing those eyeglasses!  It could totally be his thing… mild-mannered nerdilicious boy with a bubble butt turns into smoldering hot, dangerous homoerotic warrior the moment he whips off the spectacles.  Sort of a Clark Kent turns raging homoerotic wrestler angle.  It’s golden, I tell you!  And who’s the newbie sitting next to him, almost certainly texting his friends back home: DUDES! Lrenzo Lowe sittin nxt 2 me NOT WEARING ANY PANTS!!!?  I have it on good authority that this, my friends, is the already famous rookie (in my mind, at least) of the notoriously magical nipples!  Not a lot to go on in this shot, but I’m ready to say he looks cute as a button, and if those nips are half as hot as I’ve heard, I can’t wait to see that babyface screwed up in agony in a relentless two-handed nip twister!
Holy shit, some muscle hunk is wearing Gabriel Ross’ face!
Someone else will have to tell me if Gabriel Ross is making a funny face in this shot, because I’ve been staring at this pic for hours without finding the will power to tear my eyes away from his stunningly beefy bod!  Holy shit, I thought his pecs were incredible in Kid K’s snap. Get a load of that ASS and those gorgeously muscled legs!!! I have no idea who got the honors for taking on this readers’ choice sexiest Brit, but what an assignment!  Gabriel was already a master at putting the “erotic” in homoerotic wrestling.  Now that babyboy is all grown up and packing serious beef, my head is going to explode waiting to see all that muscle put to good use (well, something’s definitely about to explode!).
Damien Rush taunts the 99%
Ben’s final photo evidence that sexy and goofy go hand in hand is this knee-buckling shot of daddy’s little trust fund baby, Damien Rush, with his tongue hanging out.  Damn damn damn damn damn!  His private sessions with some trainer-to-the-rich-and-famous have been PAYING OFF!  The boy has grown wings, and I’m taking that pose as his personal challenge to me to feel what those arms can do wrapped around me in a bear hug.  I’ve been trying to land an interview with Mr. Rush’s sexy boy for months now, but “his people” haven’t made it happen yet.  The outline of that sweet meat hanging between his legs is doing nothing be renewing my determination to get this diamond stud on the record.  I swear, Damien, I won’t even ask for your tax returns!
Ben works all the right angles!
So Ben Monaco is the rookie stud of the hour for feeling the need to share a few more moments from a weekend of homoerotic wrestling with the hunks of BG East.  Ben also clarified that in addition to the hot rookie with the magical nipples, there was yet another jaw-dropping, tattooed muscle hunk rookie on hand that had many of the boys feeling faint.  That I need to see!  If ANY of the other boys present should feel like they need to defend their dignity by sharing their thoughts or pics from Pembroke, you know where to find me!

Red Baron: Come Sit Next to Me!

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Kid Karisma is back at it, passing along more dirt on his blog about last weekend gathered from another wrestler there, his friend Alan, aka Red Baron.  In our interview last winter, Kid K explained that it was Alan who first set him up to wrestle for BG East.  For that reason alone, I consider Alan a patron saint in neverland.  But apparently Alan is also carrying around potentially incriminating photographic evidence of just how far Kid K will go for a good time.  The karismatic one and his “Daddy Alan” clearly enjoy talking shit, and I for one enjoy listening to it!  Here and now let me just make myself crystal clear: neverland readers are absolutely aching to see some candid shots of Kid K compromised by too much partying!  Alan, if you’re listening, let’s talk!!!

Kid Karisma, Blaine Janus, Lorenzo Lowe and Skip Vance

It also appears that Alan also took some shots over the weekend at BG East, and Kid K has been kind enough to post them.  As is my way, I’m instantly obsessing over every detail.  For example Lorenzo with a mouth full of watermelon… damn this boy is looking sexier to me by the minute!

Skip Vance and his “Boston boyfriend,” Jonny Firestorm

I’m also noticing that Skip and his Boston boyfriend both shop at Hollister.  Unless they’re sharing clothes.  Which is just fucking adorable.

Blaine and Alan look ready to double-team a handsome new face!

Perhaps most intriguing is this shot of Blaine Janus and Alan aka Red Baron sandwiching an extremely handsome young man who I don’t think we’ve had the pleasure to meet yet.  In this shot he bears a strong resemblance to John Fugelsang, who is blisteringly hot in my book.  I’m guessing this is one of the newbies Kid Leopard mentioned as part of the cast of characters in Pembroke last weekend.  I have no independent verification as to whether this could be the hot hunk with the jaw-dropping nipples I’ve heard about.  He looks fit, but there’s really no telling from this shot what sort of physique he’s smuggling under those baggy clothes (Skip, drag this boy to Hollisters!!!).  I hope Kid K gave this handsome hottie the warm welcome a beautiful rookie face deserves (i.e., Kid Karisma’s premiere muscle ass sitting on his face!).

Red Baron pumps up to prepare for his next cub hunt.

Kid K also posted a shot of Alan pumping his guns, which illustrates why Kid K and his buddies refer to him as “Daddy” Alan.  Good thing Karisma and Alan are buddies, because shit talking with a big bear daddy like this seems dangerous if you’re a lean, 5’8″ slice of beef with baby blue eyes like Kid K.  Then again, in the words of the karismatic one…

“I don’t give a fuck!”

Keep dishing up the dirt, Kid Karisma!  Your grip on the title of my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler is fucking TIGHT with all this extra-curricular, behind the scenes insight into a hot and heavy weekend of wrestling at BG East!

Red and White and Hot All Over

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How did I not know that Kid Karisma has a blog?  Sure, he doesn’t post often, but come on!  He’s been sitting so, so pretty atop my overall favorite homoerotic wrestling rankings for months and months.  I’ve nominated his ass (specifically) for its own Wrestler Spotlight release.  How did I not know that the karismatic one has his own blog?  Thank the gods above and below that I found out, because That Ginger Guy has just today posted a cruelly teasing recap of what he may, or may not have been up to in Boston last weekend!

View across the lake from BG East headquarters

Let me just assure you I’ve done my best to coax more details out of my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler.  Flattery.  Pleading.  Monetary reward.  More flattery.  I’ve been working my ass off with Kid K to squeeze out even a little more about what went down in Boston beyond his provocative overview. I have very little to show for it, other than permission to repost these pics.

BG East is a shrine to all things wrestling!

There were three car loads of homoerotic wrestlers caravanning to Paradise for after-hour fun and games.  Jonny bought the first round.  My life is the lesser for not being able to be present when 3 car loads of BG East battle boys came through the doors of Paradise and started downing shots.

Kid K is impressively tight-lipped about any specifics of what went on at BG East headquarters, other than the pics he posted and the fantasies that they instantly inspire.  First let’s just get the most obvious revelation out of the way: Gabriel Ross’ fucking HUGE pecs!!!!

Ben Monaco, Gabriel Ross, and Kid Karisma

Holy-fuck-on-a-cracker, what have they been feeding this angelic little devil!?  The face is still the same hint o’ jailbait innocence, but this reader’s choice favorite BGE britboy grew some humungous pecs!  I’m a little dizzy anticipating what the rest of him looks like now.  I have no trouble at all understanding why Ben Monaco appears crazed with his tongue stretching out of his mouth as if of a mind of its own toward Gabe’s right nip.  I offered Kid K my firstborn, but no more pics of Gabriel were forthcoming.

Bard absolutely makes passes at boys who wear glasses!

My second a-ha moment from Kid K’s photo album from last weekend is his cozy shot with bespectacled Lorenzo Lowe.  While I seriously enjoyed his debut against Eli Black last month, I have to say that the furor that seemed to erupt around his appearance on the scene left me a little lost.  He’s adorable as hell with a mouthwatering ass, and I swear to God he looks like my first boyfriend, but the level of adoration I’m seeing from others had me scratching my head.  But the glasses, the five-o-clock shadow, and that gorgeous smile on his face in Kid K’s behind-the-scenes pic are making me reconsider my first assessment of Lorenzo. The boy’s fucking hot.  Kid K’s naked torso leaning against Lorenzo’s shoulder doesn’t exactly hurt the sexiness factor, either.

1. Where exactly is Blaine’s left hand? 2. Is there room for me?

And I’ll say to you what I said to Kid Karisma.  Blaine Janus and he primping in the bathroom for what I’m guessing are preparations for their “trip to Paradise,” looks to me like a perfectly matched set of blond-n-ginger bookends.  With that image in mind, never in my life have I wanted so much to be a book.  Kid K politely laughed at my joke.  But seriously, make me the egg salad in a Blaine and Kid Karisma sandwich and I die a happy, happy man. I’ve got plenty more mixed metaphors that I could use to describe what those two are doing to me, but I’ll spare you.

And finally, let me just spread a little gossip that I can tell you I’ve heard from no fewer than 3 eye witnesses (well, partners in crime) on hand in Pembroke last weekend.  There’s some newbie who showed up who absolutely knocked the socks off of EVERYONE.  Kid K confirmed it, and in addition to his very general description, I’ve heard from others that the new kid had a body that the boys simply couldn’t take their eyes off of.  Intriguingly, one source referenced this guy’s nipples as “jaw dropping.”  I’m on record as totally able to drop jaw for hot nips, so I definitely get the concept.  Of course, now we’ve got to wait for this rookie phenom who set hearts a pattering and crotches adjusting.

Fuck, I hate waiting.

Thanks for the exquisite torture, Kid Karisma!

Help Needed (desperately)

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I’m officially obsessed.  I began writing a homoerotic wrestling fiction story several months back.  I shelved it for a while, but I was recently drawn back to the story.  It’s one of those projects that’s consumed me a bit lately.  It’s a story I’m aching to get down on paper.  It’s haunting me a little between writing sessions.  All that’s good stuff… great, really.  I love that sort of project where it grabs me and drives me hard.  But here’s the bad news.  I’ve embedded some photos of a fitness model who I’m using to illustrate the main protagonist.  But I’ve lost all track of who this hunk is.

Now, I could just move on in any number of directions.  I could be happy with the three anonymous photos I’ve gathered (included in this post) and use them without knowing more about this beefy beauty, and not needing to look up any more provocative shots of him.  Or I could identify a new model to stand in his place and embody the protagonist I’m writing.  But at this point, this story has been sitting underneath my skin so long with this particular hunk animated in my imagination, that I’m finding it very difficult to let go of him.  I’ve spent ridiculous amounts of time searching the net for who he is, but I’ve had no luck.  In fact, I’m feeling a little paralyzed in my writing and distracted from other important tasks in my life by the search for identifying this dreamboat.  I need help.

Somebody who reads neverland knows who this guy is, I’m sure.  In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if one of you put me onto this inspiring physique and clean cut face.  Even more to the point, I know that there are net-obsessed boys with a lot more technical savvy than I have who may have just the search tool to nail this hardbody down (which, coincidentally, is precisely the plot I’m writing!).  I need you your help.  Please. Scratch this itch before it drives me insane!

Give Me All You’ve Got!

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After nearly mounting a come from behind victory over Cameron Mathews in this week’s reader’s choice poll (and given another couple of hours, I think he’d have done it!), I asked Skip Vance if he’d chat with me in more detail about what makes such a hot jobber like him tick.  He was more than happy to give a fascinating and provocative glimpse into the life of a jobber and his tall stud of a wrestling kink lover.  Skip went surprisingly deep in this interview – touching on family, chronic health concerns, and his unvarnished opinions about the people behind the scenes in homoerotic wrestling. For his honesty, his hard, hot bod, and his life lived with so many inspiring passions, I’m very happy to have had the opportunity to get to know him better. You will be, too!
————-
Skip Vance – 5’6″, 135 lbs.

Bard: First of all, I love your wrestling resume! How long have you been wrestling?

Skip: I’ve been wrestling around 6 years now. Thanks for being a fan!

Bard: Truly my pleasure! When did you get connected with BG East?

Christian shows Skip the erotic wrestling ropes.

Skip: After about a year dating Christian, one night when we were playing pool at a bar. I could tell he was scared and wanted to tell me something. It took him about an hour to tell me that he did wrestling. I was confused about why it was a big deal. So we went back to his place and he showed me a BG East VHS. Oh my God! I fell in love with wrestling that moment. We went into his then tiny bedroom were I let him beat the hell out of me in my first wrestling match I had ever done. My school had nothing of the sort.

Bard: Holy shit that’s the sexiest dating story I’ve heard EVER! Do you remember who it was that you saw him wrestling that first time?

Skip: I can’t remember at the moment but the video is in our collection. I can answer that for you in a bit after he is home from work. I’m almost certain it was TJ Tanner.

So your boyfriend takes you home, pops in a video, and shows you this…!

Bard: Hot, hot, hot! So you’ve also done some work with Rock Hard Wrestling. How did you get connected with them?

Skip: We were contacted by Rock Hard and thought we would give them a shot. Neither of us left happy. I thought the matches were too scripted and it just seemed so fake. The owner did not want it to be obviously gay. That confused the hell out of me. Since then we have learned that BG East is the place our heart is when it comes to wrestling.

Christian’s watches with concern as Tyler Reeves tortures
Skip over at RHW

Bard: Fair enough. So what’s Christian’s major wrestling weakness? What’s your best bet and making him submit?

Skip: As soon as our matches become nude it’s pretty much over with. We move on to the next best thing. I always get him in a body scissor of some sort and start taking it off.

Bard: Yes, yes, yes! What’s he do to you that you can’t resist?

Skip: For me it’s seeing his face as he gets to throw me around our wrestling room. It takes our relationship to the next level. The forceful kissing when he knows he has me and I can’t move really turns me on.

“…forceful kissing when he knows he has me and I can’t move really turns me on.”

Bard: Damn… damn, damn, damn that sounds like a match made in heaven on every level. It struck me when I was watching your Sexy Showdown 6 match for the 100th time that the two of you make quite a visually striking pair. You’re quite a bit shorter than Christian, yes?

Skip: Yes I am a lot shorter (laughing). But that does not stop me from being the one that takes control in every aspect of our relationship, if you know what I mean. Like my mother says, Christian has the brains and I have the common sense.

Bard: Mom sounds cool! Does she know what you get up to in Pembroke?

Skip: Yes my mother does know I wrestle and is a huge supporter of me no matter what I do in life, as long as I’m happy. She got picture after picture during the past weekend at BG East.

Staying fit inside and out!

Bard: That’s adorable. And damn you are one lean anatomy chart of a little stud! I’m guessing your physical conditioning is a key to your capacity to soak up the amount of punishment that you have over the years. What part of your physique are you proudest of?

Skip: I am very blessed when it comes to my body. Both my mom and dad always have been in great shape. I guess I’m the proudest of what you can’t see. I was diagnosed with Chron’s disease a few years ago. I keep to a strict diet to keep from having flare-ups. It was a very hard battle to stop all my bad habits when it came to food. I was always the one that would eat what I want when I want and lucky for me my body didn’t notice (laughing). I will say my hair is one of the most important things. I have had this hair style for about 15 years… way longer than Justin Bieber.

Bard: And you’d so kick Bieber’s ass! In fact, I’d pay to see that. A lot. Is your Chron’s under control these days? Since you were just at BGE throwing down, I’m guessing your still doing pretty well.

Skip: Yes my health is back to 100%. Flare-ups can happen at any point in time, so a healthy diet is a must.

Bard: Glad to hear it’s under control. What part of your physique does Christian like most?

It’s Skip’s ass that does it for Christian

Skip: Christian says its my ass that has always done it for him. I’m so little and it’s just.. there… he said.

Bard: I went on the record months ago calling for, nay, pleading to see you and Christian turn tag team partners with a nod to the fact that you’re lovers out of the ring as well. So when I recently saw your Facebook update reporting that you were climbing into the ring last weekend to wrestle a tag team match with him, I was dizzy with excitement. Tell me every last detail you can tell me without having Kid Leopard hunt us both down and kick our asses!

Skip: I really can’t go into any details on the match besides its very hot. With BG East it might be a while until it comes out.

Bard: I want to give you a ton of credit for being at the forefront of reaching out to your fans. I realize that not all homoerotic wrestlers want to interact with their fan base, and of course that’s cool, but you have been absolutely wonderful about acknowledging your fans, being available to us through your Facebook page and your new fan page, and really demonstrating genuine appreciation and respect for the guys who can’t get enough of you! Is there anything you’d like your fans to know about you, about your work, or about the business?

Skip:
 I want my fans to know that I am the most chill person behind the boy that likes his ass beat (laughing). I love my job. I am a union steward. Politics is my life, I want to help change this country for the better on LGBT rights. Being with my partner for 7 years and not being able to have the same rights as a married couple hurts me. My hobbies are remodeling our home, working outside, running and playing with my three dogs.

Bard: Coincidentally, I used to have a shop steward who should’ve been a homoerotic wrestler! And all of the sexiest men have dogs… that’s my working theory at least. Speaking of getting your ass beast, you seem to be awfully proud of the fact that your lean ass has been bashed by the best. What’s it like for you when you’re in the middle of a match being dominated by some bigger guy?

Skip: Oh, it’s great. Just when you think you can’t take anymore, the beating gets worse. At least in mine and Jonny’s match it did. I tell the guys before we start to wrestle that just because I am in pain does not mean I’m asking you to stop or to go easier. Outside of wrestling you would never think I love a good beating. It’s wrestling that gets that part out of me. And thank god because other wise I would be in a lot if street fights.

Skip’s “Boston boyfriend” knows what Skip likes

Bard: Speaking of your match with Jonny Firestorm, wowza! Damn he OWNED you, and I hope you don’t mind me saying that the way you suffered in his hands was a masterpiece! I mean, sometimes we see guys “suffer,” as in grimace and grunt a little and squirm (not to name any names), but holy hell! The out and out anguish wracking your entire, smoking hot bod was absolutely incredible to watch. I saw on your FB page a shot of you, Jonny and Christian from this weekend. Looks like after all that brutality, you’re good friends.

Skip: Yes, even after the brutality we are great friends. We stay in touch between wrestling weekends at BG East. Jonny is a very chill guy that nobody should have a problem getting along with. I always kid and say he is my Boston boyfriend. I honestly thought he was going to slam me through the wall in our match. He was surprised that I was able to walk after all the wrestling holds he got me in. All in all I would say our match is my favorite to this day.

Bard: Is Jonny the opponent who made you hurt the worst?

Skip: Absolutely, and I want another match with him. It’s awesome when you know you have wrestled the best. But at the same time I want my other opponents to come with the same energy and strength.

Bard: So name some names, Skip! Other than Christian, who’s turned you on the hardest?

“Bounce, bounce, bounce!”

Skip: I would say my top three being Jonny, Kid Karisma and Mike Martin.

Bard: That’s a beautiful, beautiful list! Seriously, Kid Karisma’s ass… as mind-blowing in person as it is on camera?

Skip: Absolutely. I love it when he makes it shake (laughing). Just imagine going to the club with him. Bounce, bounce, bounce.

Bard: Oh my, I’ll have to mull that image over in my mind for a while. But in the mean time, the Boss mentioned in a comment on the blog that this past weekend in addition to you and Christian and a bunch of other wrestlers who make me insanely aroused, there were at least a couple of newbies. What do you think a brand spanking new rookie needs to show in a BG East debut to establish himself as a returning fan favorite?

Skip: I would say personality is key during the match. Of course as wrestlers we are getting to live out our fantasies, but we have to make sure we’re doing everything we can so they viewer watching at home is living out his as he watches. This is the reason I feel so strongly in reaching out to my fans and getting to know them. It helps in my match to know I’m making someone else as happy as I’m making myself.

Bard: I love that attitude! And it totally shows in your wrestling. Who haven’t you faced yet at BGE that you’d like to get your hands on (and vice versa)?

Cameron Mathews could give Skip a welcome beating

Skip: I got to watch a match live with Cameron Matthews this past weekend. I would love to take a good beating from him.

Bard: It’s no wonder that he managed to hold off your late advance in the reader’s choice poll, is it? He’s one hot wrestler with a fantastic ability to sell and an amazing body to watch! Anybody else, current or past at BGE, that you’d like to get worked on by? Because I’ve got suggestions… Like how is it possible Kid Vicious hasn’t got his hands on you? I’d also make a case for Denny Cartier… Denny always seems to me to be teetering on the edge of turning really, really dark, and a punishment sponge like you could be just the thing to awaken Denny’s inner beast! Just suggesting.

Skip: I’m very open for suggestions. I honestly am willing to take on anyone. I kind of get a thrill out of going into the matches not knowing who I’m up against. Majority of the time I’m very pleased with the wrestler. I always let them know in my pre-match up that I don’t want them to take it easy on me. If you’re not giving me all you have then you’re wasting my time.

Bard: Speaking of giving your all, your offer to go on a dinner date with one lucky fan if you won the “Dinner Date” reader’s choice poll at neverland this week was absolutely brilliant! I was tempted to try to stuff the ballot box on your behalf, but frankly I’m not technologically savvy enough to know how to do that. Next time I’m in your hometown, will you let me treat you dinner?

Skip’s happy all over to wrestle Mike Martin!

Skip: Absolutely. I love cooking and having guests over. The first thing I did after returning from Boston was to finish my collection of china. I aim to please in everything I do. It would be an honor to have you over for dinner. In the past year I could count on two hands the times me and Christian have gone out to eat. I make lunch for him on Sundays that will last the week. I cook dinner fresh every night. I am huge in buying local and staying away from corporate bullshit stores. I even go to a place called the strip district to buy local meats and veggies. If I can’t find out we’re it’s from I do not buy it.

Bard: I’m getting a clear picture of why Christian has been with you for 7 years!!!

Skip: I also do grow my own garden every year. I was raised in Arkansas. My nearest neighbor being 4 miles away. My family lived off the land. My grandfather was a commercial fisherman so fresh is the only way for me.

Bard: Sounds fantastic! What did you mean when you said you finished your collection of china?

Skip: (laughing) I’ve been collecting and buying it piece by piece because, let’s just be frank, I don’t buy anything cheap. If I do not have the cash up front then I do not get it. So for the past two years I’ve been slowly buying it. Now it’s complete and I NEED a guest to serve! (laughing)

Bard: (laughing) I’m your man, then! Fresh, organic, and homemade… on expensive china? I’m tempted to book a flight today! I hope you’re okay with hosting a vegetarian. Am I correct in remembering from your Facebook post recently that you’re available to wrestle for hire? What’s it like being hired to fulfill somebody’s personal wrestling fantasy like that?

Skip stays in shape to face his next opponent… you?

Skip: We’ll that is something new I’m trying to get into. With Christian being out of grad school we want to get our debt paid off ASAP so we can one day adopt a child. I am certain I will love it. I keep an open mind with everything. I want my fans to enjoy more than just a video. I want to please my fans in my videos and give them the chance to meet me and get to do what Jonny Firestorm did to me – to get their hands on me!

Bard: Awe-some! Reading the comments on your Facebook page and fan page, it’s clear that there are plenty guys who want just that. With the extremely hot action that you and Christian have both been part of at BGE, has there ever been any jealousy? Mike Martin’s tongue down Christian’s throat ever give you a twinge? Your lips around Billy Lodi’s cock make Christian a little green?

Skip: Not that I’m aware of. We both know that we’re made for each other. Of course at home and for BG East we’re very honest and open in our relationship. If he or I find a guy to be very hot and want to wrestle and get a little wild we let each other know. Keeping open conversation with each other is key. Christian can sometimes wear me out with all his energy, and it’s good to just sit back and watch.

Bard: I know from experience that it can be very good to sit back and watch either of you take on someone new! Is there anything else you’d like fans to know about what makes an unabashed hot jobber like you tick?

Skip: I’m drawing a blank (laughing). Just being yourself is key for me. I am not in to people making themselves out to be someone they’re not. If you’re honest we will work well together.

Bard: 
I know you get a ton of praise from your fans through watching the comments on your Facebook page, but it bears repeating: you’re one awesome, sexy as hell wrestler and a true delight to both watch wrestle and talk with! Thanks for doing this!

Skip: Hey, no problem. If you ever have any questions or want to talk just hit me up. Thanks again. It’s been a pleasure.

Bieber’s got nothing on BG East’s resident hot jobber!

Dinner Date Chosen

wrestlebard1 Comment
Cam’s the dinner date of choice!
The commanding winner in the reader’s choice poll to determine which homoerotic wrestler readers would most want to have visit their homes for dinner was none other than wrestling hunk extraordinaire Cameron Mathews.  He crossed the finish line with 36% of the vote, which is a decisive testimony to the loyal fans he’s earned from working that gorgeous bubble butt of his off from coast to coast and production to production over the past decade.  He held steady at or around 50% of the vote through most of the two days that the poll was open, in fact, looking like he was going to blow away his next closest competition by more than double.  However, just this morning, with mere hours left to vote, shit got interesting!
Skip convinces Christian that he’ll show up for dinner with a fan too!
That’s when fierce little scrapper Skip Vance put out a message on Facebook lobbying his fans to mount a come from behind maneuver on Cam (and who among us haven’t fantasized about a come from behind maneuver on Cam!?).  Skip offered one fan selected at random to be treated to a dinner made by his own hands if he ends up on top of the polls once all is said and done.  He instantly got a bump, pulling ahead of Kid Karisma for second place.  When Skip added that both he and former homoerotic wrestler of the month and Skip’s lover, Christian Taylor, would sit down to said dinner with the randomly selected fan, the sprint to the finish line was on! He began to close the distance with Cam at such a pace that I was seriously beginning to suspect a photo finish.  While Cam limped across the line with the decisive victory, nobody was stronger around the last turn than hot and eager Skip! As to whether he’ll still auction off a dinner date, we’ll have to wait and see.

Kid Karisma can’t believe you left him in 3rd place!
Third place winner and party-boy muscle stud Kid Karisma has got to be scratching his head right about now wondering how he not only got outpaced by Cam but blown-by flat footed by late bloomer Skip! Somehow, I’m guessing with his life-of-the-party karisma and astonishingly sexy body (look… at… that… ASS!!!), Kid K has never been short of dinner invitations. If he’s ever in need of a hot meal and adoring company, he’s got a place at my table anytime.  As for restraining myself from putting my hands on those glutes, no promises, Kid K.
Dinner? Steel Muscle God Dan may be too busy being worshipped!
Not surprisingly, Steel Muscle God Dan had a very solid showing in the poll. It’s not surprising because if you spend any time at all at steelmusclegod.com, you pick up on the fact very quickly that Dan’s got a worldwide following of extremely rabid fans who are very, very loyal to SMG.  If he’d put out the call to his worshippers to really mobilize the vote, I strongly suspect he’d have put some hurt on even Cam.  I’m not too worried that SMG’s ego will take a hit for not winning the reader’s choice poll here. He’s got muscles of steel, for god’s sake, and the self-confidence to strip naked and demand to be worshipped.  However, if he’s ever in the neighborhood and feeling peckish, he can take solace in the fact that I’ll be more than happy to set another place at the table.
“A Fabulous Dinner Date!”
Through back channels I was delighted to hear that Lon Dumont had an opinion on the matter.  His opinion was, of course, that he’d make a “fabulous dinner date!”  He also mentioned that since he’s been dieting like a fiend in preparation for the bodybuilding season about to commence any minute, he could seriously put 2nds and 3rds away right now, so plan ahead if you invite him to dinner. Lon knows that he has a standing invitation to my table, and I’m also ever ready to apply his instant tan all over every inch of his body before any and every competition (which wasn’t up for consideration in the poll, but I just wanted to make that point clear).
Not everyone could handle an evening with Eli Black
I’m guessing Eli Black knows full well why he didn’t win.  You were too fucking scared of him! Truth be told, despite his expansive ego and fiercely competitive spirit when it comes to absolutely everything, I just bet that the Shutdown would completely charm the pants off you if you had him over for dinner.  Of course, the poll wasn’t about who you’re ready to take your pants off for, but even keeping my pants on, I’d be delighted and honored to pass Eli the mashed potatoes.
Darius “BMG” is looking for a taste of SMG!
Darius had a solid showing in the poll, reflecting what I happen to know is a loyal base of fans who’ve been wanting to see more of this Black Muscle God – more screen time and more skin! Darius let it be known that he doled out his vote for Steel Muscle God, because despite SMG being a no-show to face Darius stateside, Darius still has his sights set on an epic showdown between the Steel Muscle God and the Black Muscle God. Fuck the poll! I’ll push my furniture to the walls to watch that battle of the gods live!
Is that Chris Isaak? No, it’s hot jobber Ken Canada!
Long-time friend and contributor to this blog, Stay Puft, let it be known that he simply had to register his vote for energizer bunny and possessor of endless hotness and stories of hotness, Ken Canada. He never picked up traction in the polling, but I have to agree with S.P. when he points out that Ken’s sense of humor and enthusiastic understanding of the eroticism of wrestling would make him a truly entertaining dinner date!
Cage Thunder is busy serving up some meat of his own
I happen to know that Cage Thunder registered his vote in the poll for Lon. Get those two bull dozers on the same page and I can’t imagine what tag team would dare step foot in the ring with them.  But around the dinner table, I can’t help but figure that meal would go into the wee hours of the morning as these two profoundly reflective men trade wit and wisdom from never-ending reserves.  Personally, I’m a little astonished Cage Thunder didn’t show better in the polling, and I have to chalk it up to Eli’s theory that there were just a whole lot of you too damn frightened to sit across the table from him.  Not me.  He’s got a standing invitation at chez Bard.

Don’t bother Ben with dinner invitations.  He’s building a wrestling career, people!
The rookie sensation with magical lips, Ben Monaco never managed to build a head of steam in voting.   Big Ben is brand spanking new to the industry, of course, so pitting him against absolute fixtures in homoerotic wrestling like Cameron Mathews was always going to be an uphill battle for him.  My educated guess is that Ben isn’t surprised at all that he wasn’t the top vote-getter, and if anything he’s just that much more eager to plant his hot ass on another opponent’s face and absolutely make you forget all about the rest for a moment and marvel at him as he tests what he’s got against the best at BGE.  Ben knows he’s just at the beginning of an incredibly sexy, demanding journey into our hearts, but as for me I’ve got a casserole and a bottle of wine just waiting for him.

Reader’s Choice Poll – Dinner Date

wrestlebard4 Comments
When asked which presidential candidate they would prefer to visit their home for dinner, 52% of respondents named President Obama, compared with just 33% of them selecting $omney.  Personally, I think this is the most useless polling question to be asked every four years, but sadly the American electorate seems to consistently prioritize this kind of popularity contest over actual qualifications for leading this country (foreign policy experience? a grasp of the legislative process? the capacity to make life-and-death decisions with regard to the use of military power and weapons of mass destruction?  no, we’re more likely to vote based on who we’d prefer to have dinner with… oy).  That’s enough of my political analysis for today, other than to alert my Swedish readers once again that if Tax-Dodger $omney is elected in November, I expect one of you to sponsor me as a political refugee.
I say let’s save such weighty questions like who we’d prefer to visit our homes for dinner for really important matters, like considering our favorite homoerotic wrestlers.  Sure, dinner table repartee isn’t exactly all that relevant to what compels us most in picking our homoerotic wrestling fare, but I still say it’s more relevant to wrestlers than politicians.  So this reader’s choice poll asks you to consider who you’d most prefer to have over for dinner.  I’m limiting the field to those who’ve demonstrated at least a little of their communication skills by being interviewed on the pages of this blog.  You can nominate someone else in the comments below, but the names on the poll are strictly drawn from the “friends of the blog” on record. This is about the dinner table, mind you.  Don’t base your choice on who’d you prefer to make you suffer in a head scissors in the living room after dinner.  We’re talking about an evening absent of actual wrestling (though of course the dinner conversation is entirely available to muse on the topic).  We’re also not talking about who you want to fuck.  This is an evening in which no semblance of sexual contact is going to happen.  You can decide how to instruct your dinner guests with regard to attire, so you can eye-fuck them across the table all night long, but physical contact is limited to handshakes and, let’s just say, a lingering, full-body hug to say goodnight (no ass squeeze!).  The real question is who would you like sitting across the table from you to talk with, to ask for their insights, to tell them what’s on your mind, to wax philosophical about wrestling or politics or religion or whatever topic the two of you want to talk about.  So that’s the background.  Here are your choices of dinner guests:

Lon Dumont: the first wrestler to grant me an interview a year and a half ago, Lon’s body and wrestling skills have earned him a permanent spot at or very near the top of my favorites ever since I first set eyes on him.  His ring banter was one of the most entertaining and arousing aspects of his work that captured my attention and keeps me coming back for more.  But his interview was a revelation into the diverse passions and thoughtful, open-minded outlook on life that make me think Lon would make an absolutely delightful dinner guest. Topics you would most likely find yourself discussing: bodybuilding, pets, indy wrestling, homoerotic wresting, hairstyles, freedom from religion, and Rocky.

Ken Canda: this classic from the early days of BG East has his picture next to the definition of the phrase: hot jobber.  His wrestling is foundational watching for those with any interest in seeing the evolution of the pro wrestling babyface jobber into an entirely unique and incredibly arousing fixture tailored to the tastes of the gay wrestling kink audience.  No, you DON’T get to pound him in an OTK backbreaker and claw his balls, though under different circumstances, I suspect he may very well be open to it (so save it for your second date).  But as evidenced in his extensive interview on the pages of this blog, Ken is happy to stroll down memory lane and tell you absolutely intoxicating tales of behind the cameras shenanigans from the early days at BGE, including delightful descriptions of every wrestler he faced and just how incredibly arousing it was to be brutalized over and over again.  You will hear about the esprit de corps that forged bonds of brotherhood and homoerotic beauty among the men who truly enjoyed each other’s company on and off camera, as well as the insights of a fellow wrestling kinkster who continues to live and love the eroticism of wrestling whenever he gets the chance.

Kid Karisma: As he explained in our interview last January, there’s a reason the Boss gave him the moniker Kid Karisma! While you won’t have the chance to get your hands on that legendary muscle ass of his over dinner, you can get lost gazing into those baby blues and have your feet swept right out from underneath you (metaphorically) by that sly, sideways grin and a wink from the man who is as charismatic as they come! He’ll entertain you with the extremely hot candid photos he takes with his phone, and just between the two of you, he’s likely to spill all the dirt on the best, baddest, horniest and hottest action to go on behind the scenes at BG East. I recommend not serving your best china, because I’m guessing this insatiable party boy could be dancing on the table before dessert!

Eli Black: a wrestling match with this hot young phenom would put you on your back in a heartbeat, but a no-holds dinner date with the boy wonder would, no doubt, just as surely keep you on your toes.  As I learned first hand in our interview last February, he’s got an in-your-face charm that I personally find completely disarming, but don’t let your defenses down too quickly.  Eli is not a man to be trifled with, and polite chit chat about the weather or the price of tea in China will earn you a withering insult and sneer of contempt.  But if you’re up for a dinner guest who loves a debate, who wants nothing more than to meet the man who’ll give as hard as he gets, and who never, ever tires of talking about the most important topic of all: himself; then Eli may be your man. I’m also guessing he’ll have his shirt and pants off in a heartbeat if you show a little interest in his ink (but remember, you don’t get to touch, just admire hands-free).

Steel Muscle God “Dan”: SMG rocked my world when he agreed to chat with me about the life of an online bodyworship phenom with an innate understanding of wrestling kink.  While you are not allowed to lick his steel muscles from head to toe during this dinner date, I guarantee you that you’ll feel a stirring deep down in your pants the moment he opens his luscious lips and growls out his erotically charged baritone.  Seriously, this man oozes sexiness. He could make me cum by reading the phonebook, and I’ll be damned if I wouldn’t come back for more of the same as soon as I reloaded.  Although you can’t touch it, SMG is an unapologetic exhibitionist, so whatever attire you specified, plan on seeing him take it off before the meal is over.  Be prepared to laugh a lot, because he’s got an entrancing sense of humor, and he’s the only hot bodied hunk I know with both the balls to take our money to worship his naked body AND poke fun at himself.  Conversation is likely to revolve around friends, working out, and censorship on the net, but seriously… just shut the fuck up, watch his gorgeous lips move, and let that voice transport you to your fondest fantasies.
Skip Vance: although I haven’t enjoyed a full-length interview with him yet, Skip did considerately take  the time to give me some on-the-record feedback on my take on his real life lover and rumored-to-be tag team partner, former homoerotic wrestler of the month Christian Taylor.  An unapologetic jobber with a crazy lust for getting his hot bod bashed mercilessly, he’s off limits for you to dish out any of your own corporal punishment you’ve been inspired to fantasize about after watching Skip at work! But I can guarantee you that you’ll definitely hear him gush about his life of domestic bliss with Christian (including their private wrestling routines), his fierce lust for wrestling, and the catalog of crushing humiliation he’s suffered at the hands of… well, everyone!  Don’t be surprised to also get a strong dose of workers’ rights and musings on healthy cooking, because he’s one well-rounded babyface masochist!

Ben Monaco: in our interview in June, Ben gave neverland readers a glimpse into what it’s like for a new kid on the block to get “discovered” by the star-makers at BG East.  His hungry lips are completely off limits to you this night, mind you, but perhaps you’ll decide to serve popsicles for desert so you can watch him wrap those baby’s around something long and suck it hard.  He’s a new face in the homoerotic wrestling universe, but I can assure you that you’ll enjoy plenty of delightful insights into erotic wrestling from him.  Ask him about the gallons of sweat he drenches his opponents with… go ahead, I dare you, because after listening to him describe his body slipping and sliding across his opponent’s drenched muscles, you’ll be politely excusing yourself to take care of a pressing need that’s arisen in your crotch.  If you can convince him that you can keep a secret, he’ll tell you straight up who’s doing what on camera and off, and he’ll give you his unvarnished opinion on the ranks he’s still working to rise within.

Cage Thunder: my interview in July was just the tip of the iceberg about knowing the man beneath the mask.  You know you want him to knee you in the balls and crush your face into his crotch as you grovel in front of him, but none of that is allowed on this dinner date! So take a cold shower and pick out your finest mask to wear, because Cage Thunder is a class act who’ll demand the best.  Points of discussion to prepare for: wrestling, gear, New Orleans, erotica, boys he’s bashed, boys he’s still waiting to bash, the existential implications of all of the above… If you’re daring, though, you’ll just mention the name “Mitch Colby,” and then sit back and watch the sparks fly for hours on end!

Darius: also granting me an interview in July, bodybeautiful private wrestling hunk turned BG East muscle beast, Darius would be a charming dinner date, I’m certain.  There’s just something about him that makes me think of the word “gentlemanly.”  If it’s the custom in your house, I expect he wouldn’t think twice about taking his shoes off when entering.  Hell, tell him it’s the custom in your house and I bet the beautiful hunk of muscle would take all his clothes off to show you your proper respect, because he’s not shy for an instant about showing skin! Working out, the underground wrestling circuit, his plans to destroy SMG in body and soul… all these are likely topics you’ll cover over the course of the evening, but the only thing you’ll remember when the napkins are put down and the last of the wine gone is falling into those gorgeous eyes and watching his knee-buckling sexy lips move as he talks to you.  Go ahead and tell him it’s the custom in your house that dinner guests flex for their dessert. Darius is not a man to neglect the niceties! 

Cameron Mathews: just last month I interviewed your final option for a dinner date with a homoerotic wrestler.  I know you want Cam and Lon to show up together, preferably to reprise their indy wrestling days and wrestle one another in your living room, but it’s not going to happen this time! If it’s Cam who strikes your fancy, just remember you can look at that legendary bubble butt, but you can’t touch! He’s pretty much the epitome of a babyface, but don’t think for an instant that you’ll have some naive kid tucking his napkin in his shirt and asking you to pass the ketchup for his filet mignon.  This veteran of nearly every production company across homoerotic and straight-up independent wrestling known to man has seen it all, and if you’re ready to show him his proper respect, I bet he’ll keep the conversation lively with stories from the long road of making a living with a passionate love of wrestling, a hot body, and boyish good looks. If you’re looking for reflections on post-Marxist critical philosophers, Cam may not be your man, because he lives, breathes, eats and drinks nothing but wrestling, my friends.  But if it’s every aspect of wrestling from coast to coast, hardbody to doughboy, ring to mat, jobber to heel that will delight you, then you can’t go wrong with picking Cam.

Register your vote at the right. Only one vote per person (this is highly scientific!). Polls close in 2 days. Lobbying for your choice in the comments below is strongly encouraged.