Still-Frame Fantasies

I remember the first time I came across (so to speak) sites like Can-Am and BG East online.  My heart pounded in my chest.  This is exactly my thing, I thought!  Holy fuck on a cracker, the images of hot athletes in minuscule gear captured in still-frame in provocative, evocative moments in wrestling sent off explosions in my head (and pants, sure).  I emotionally wrestled for a while with my own closet before I ordered my first homoerotic wrestling videos.  But that period after I first glimpsed homoerotic wrestling in still-frame online and before I had a video popped in the VCR to watch the action in motion was, in and of itself, a pristinely beautiful thing.  The fantasies that those pics inspired could have fueled a small city with the combustion that they set off inside of me.  Everything that came before and everything that came after the shutter going click to capture a given still-frame was alive with possibility that my virile imagination was thrilled to muse over.  One homoerotic wrestling producer (not KL) once chided me gently for my infatuation with photos, since homoerotic wrestling is, by definition, a kinetic thing best (essentially?) defined in motion.  But my homoerotic wrestling kink has always included a deep passion for the fantasies that a particular wrestling still-frame can ignite within me that, occasionally, exceeds the reality once I get my eyes on the video.  With that in mind, I have a whole new batch of still frame fantasies ignited in response to the preview pics of BG East’s latest catalog release, Catalog 97.  So many fantasies, so much erotic energy generated!  And I’m a major fan of BG East’s commitment to document their products with both a videographer and photographer present.  The boys with their eyes in the viewfinders of the cameras deserve major credit in my book, because these images are stunningly gorgeous!

I’ve been waiting to see this hairy beast that friend of this blog, Ben Monaco, discovered on camera, and Mat Scraps 2 finally introduces the world to pouty-lipped muscle beast, Alain LeClair.  He’s 6 foot tall, 187 pounds, and with those telephone poles wrapped around Ben’s abdomen, he’s blowing my mind!  There are more climax-worthy still frames in Ben and Alain’s match, including what looks like intense forced muscle worship, but this pic in particular, with Alain grinning as he watches Ben’s face twisted in agony, is incredibly hot!

The coverboy for Catlog 97 is the stud on the right in this shot, Arn Nedic, who goes gorgeous-muscle-to-gorgeous-muscle with insanely baby face muscleboy, Connor Cross in Motel Madness 12.  I’m imagining that there will be an instant fan base lining up right behind Connor’s incredible muscle ass wrapped so unbelievably tightly in those baby blue trunks.  However, there’s something dizzying about the shots of Arn that are already haunting my dreams (waking and sleeping).  Holy fuck, look at those shoulders!  His pecs alone are sending my erotic fantasies into overdrive.  I don’t think I’ve ever harbored an intense erotic fascination for a Serbian go-go boy before, but I’ve got one now. Bad.

Just saying “Alexi Adamov versus Aryx Quinn” is enough to get me hard, but damn!  The preview pics of this clash of titans in Ring Revenge 1 are wildly sexy.  Is it possible that Alexi is still growing taller?  Because he seems to dwarf his opponents more and more, despite facing the hot, smooth muscle bod belonging to someone like Aryx.  Alexi captured, strapped to a ring post, and about to get those picture PERFECT abs pounded is like an image out of Greek mythology, and, of course, my erotic fantasies.

Drake Marcos has been incredibly delightful to get to know since his debut just a couple of months ago.   He has the looks and the personality that instantly attract me.  That Cheshire Cat smile and obvious enthusiasm for high stakes, profuse sweat, unrefereed erotic wrestling are profoundly compelling.  But I have to admit, I sort of overlooked Ray Naylor when he debuted earlier in the autumn, my attention drawn more to the magic of his first opponent, Cameron Mathews.  But this particular preview pic from Drake and Ray’s match in Mat Scraps 2 keeps me coming back to admire Ray’s beautifully sweaty back and that incredibly hot ass, positioned so perfectly with Drake’s face trapped in that luscious figure-4 headlock.  Talk about cheek-to-cheek!  What an image!

Again, there are a dozen evocative images from Eli Black and Diego Diaz’ ab-destroying ring match in Gut Bash 10: Eli Strikes Back.  The size differential between these two men is amazing, and the side-by-sides that illustrate Diego’s beautifully musclebody towering over painfully lean “little” Eli tell an incredibly hot story.  But there’s something about this pic of Diego’s gorgeous, hairy pecs stretched out, his glute flexed, his massive white boots on those incredibly long legs tucked up underneath Eli’s chin, and the pain contorting Diego’s handsome face into a mask of agony that’s got me hooked.

Again, there are a dozen pics of Denny Cartier’s Ring Revenge 1 match with beach buddy rookie Kai Sotelo, but I’m so enthralled with 2-time homoerotic wrestler of the month Denny Cartier that I can’t take my eyes off of this solo image of him.  There are arguably “prettier” wrestlers.  There are unarguably bigger wrestlers.  But there’s just something about Denny that continues to stroke me hard.  The fuck-me brown eyes in this shot are daring me to dive into the ring with him, I swear.  And that dimpled chin of his was obviously stolen straight off of a 1950’s big screen leading man.  I long to see Denny take a major league heel turn, but then again I also long to see someone not only best Denny, but give him a severe tongue lashing in defeat (with some lingering sucking saved for that chin and those nipples).  So far, this is not the direction Denny’s wrestling has taken him with BG East, but pics like these have me helplessly writing that plot in my own mind.

Speaking of helpless!  This image from Kid Vicious taking ownership of Len Harder in Ball Bash 3 is sculpture that deserves to be in an art museum.  Every inch of this, every angle, everything is so fucking gorgeous!!!  From the self-satisfied sneer on KV’s handsome face to the exquisite, gasping agony on Len, there’s a whole story (or 30) summed up in this one shot.  The total mastery, Len’s semi-erect cock dangling vulnerably, the defensive-yet-amorous way the Len clutches KV’s neck with his right hand… I’m as captured by this photo as Len is completely captured by KV!

Lon Dumont’s physique is always profoundly pleasing to me, of course, but the shots of him from his Hair Stakes 1 (of many more, please!?)  match with Ethan Andrews are pure fantasy gold.  I remember in Lon’s Gut Bash battle against massively bigger Joe Robbins that Lon was not about to concede that big Joe’s body was better conditioned than petite Lon’s bodybuilder bod… except for the legs.  Lon apparently has some insecurities about his legs, and side by side with the sequoias that Joe calls his thighs, Lon was giving all the credit to the big man beneath the belt.  That was last bodybuilding season.  A year or so later, Lon’s back and putting his hair on the line against recent addition to the BG East fold, Ethan, and clearly, Lon’s been blasting his legs like a madman.  Hair pulling is, in and of itself, a major turn on for me (when done right), so this match is automatically high on my list.  But this pic in particular, with Lon hanging so vulnerably in a tree of woe as Ethan steps on his long locks, sends me right over the edge.  The drama, the beauty, and those pink trunks squeezed onto Lon’s smooth, lickable body is picture perfect!

Tyrell Tomsen and Jonny Firestorm have both, independently grabbed my attention often, including on the pages of this blog.  Jonny’s photo expose on his stunning forearms was one my favorite Christmas gifts this year, and Tyrell has been a vision of physical perfection in the ring making me swoon.  The pairing of these two is an intoxicating idea for Ring Revenge 1, and this image of Jonny hanging, body tensed and suffering as sweat drips off him, in Tyrell’s lovely bearhug is fantastic.  This is another example of the visually stunning proportions of two bodies sized entirely differently. Jonny’s track record as a serious badass award winning heel, paired with the screaming agony on his face as he suffers helplessly in Tyrell’s arms, sends my homoerotic wrestling fantasies into overdrive!

Ty Garrison has been making me cum for years now, appearing in BG East UK releases for a long time.  Like Denny Cartier, Ty gives me such a powerful hit of a “real” bloke, a guy who quickly rips to shreds any awkward pretense of a wrestling scenario on camera to get down to a seriously competitive and fiercely focused wrestler.  This Motel Madness 12 pic of Ty’s face smothered against the crotch of a another “Denny,” that is, this stunningly pretty refugee from some French boyband, Deni Dupuis, does all sorts of things to my wrestling kink.  Tighty whities, Brit footie fan vs. French beauty, lovely rookie vs. thoroughbred veteran… this works me into a lather in an instant.

My final still frame fantasy from BG East’s new release of Catalog 97 is this incredible shot of hairy heel Morgan Cruise flexing in victory with muscle hunk Marc Merino’s head locked up tight between Morgan thighs as the big, gorgeous, naked jobber tops himself off in obedient submission.  Again, the contrasting bodies, the stark naked beauty, the narrative written across Morgan’s gloating face and the completely dominated position of Marc… damn, this is a stunningly hot image.  I know that Muscle Destruction 1 is a 1:1 battle, but this shot inflames my desperate imagination longing for a full contact tag team story.  Just picture this view as belonging to Marc’s tag team partner, watching from the corner helplessly as his big, powerful muscle stud of a partner is so completely humiliated and destroyed.  Or, better yet, picture this perspective as belonging to Morgan’s tag team partner, having subdued whoever Marc’s chump of a tag partner is, and leaving Morgan’s wingman to slowly stroll up, kneel down between Marc’s gorgeous thighs, and force those bronze knees apart.

There are more beautiful, tempting sensations to be sampled in Catalog 97, but these particular images captured my imagination hard, igniting countless fantasies of what could lay behind and ahead of these moments in time.  I’m looking forward to getting my eyes on the matches themselves, no doubt.  I’m a wide-eyed fanatic for trash talk, and did I mention that Lon Dumont and Ethan Andrews face one another in the ring in Hair Stakes!?  But for the moment, the particular titillation of these still-frame fantasies take me back to those first moments of discovering the online world of homoerotic wrestling and knowing that whatever the reality of the matches themselves, these images are beautiful proof that this kink I love is something I share with a whole lot of others.

Fuck Concessions

I love how technology and blogs have been increasingly bringing fans of homoerotic wrestling into closer proximity with homoerotic wrestlers.  The first time I read one of Joe’s interviews with a wrestler, I was thrilled and inspired.  I’m sure there are clock punchers in the business, but the revelation that some of our favorite wrestlers-for-gay-eyes enjoy the attention and appreciate the celebrity they possess within our circle of interest somehow sweetens the pot of the homoerotic wrestling industry.  I think of the interviews I’ve had the opportunity to conduct as highlights of the labor of love that I invest in this blog.  They’ve brought a welcome sense of humor and humanity to the fantasies I treasure of homoerotic wrestling, and, unexpectedly, they’ve made me a fierce advocate for fans treating wrestlers with common decency and plenty of respect.

Rio Garza – BG East’s Best Body of 2012
So when BG East’s Best of 2012 poll came out, and even more when I thought about the results as they were announced, it made me wonder what the objects of our popularity polls think of being ranked, ordered, and lauded or looked over.  From the consumer side of homoerotic wrestling, I found the poll to be a very fun exercise in examining my own tastes in comparison with more than 500 or so other fans.  But from the wrestler side of things, I had to wonder what the boys themselves thought of the exercise. Any gloating?  Any hurt feelings?

Lon Dumont – Nominated for Top Heel, Best Body, Best Abs, Best Butt… but came out with a trophy
Hell YES!  Lon Dumont sent me a text demanding a recount.  I don’t know if a recount would help, but I’m entirely with him on finding the results unsatisfying when it comes to recognizing what an insanely hot wrestler he is!  My hope is that, as he enters a new bodybuilding season in a few weeks, he’ll take this defeat at the BG East polls and turn it into gold on stage, and then bring in his bodybuilding trophies and shove them, and his bulging biceps, in the face of his next opponent.

Cameron Matthews asks you to just look at this photo and explain his absence from the nominees for best abs and best body

One of Lon’s buddies, Cameron Matthews, also was not pleased, despite anchoring Babyface Brawls 2, winner of best ring match.  Cameron made one of the most compelling arguments against his exclusion from the categories of best abs and best body by simply posting to his blog this fucking gorgeous photo of himself from his recent wrestling trip to the UK, in which his unbelievably hot six-pack was doused in oil and on awesome display.  Under the title “Best of 2012 Complaints,” Cam reviews the slights and mistake of the pollsters themselves.  “Didn’t even make it into the finalist of Best Body 2012.  3rd Place as Top Babyface.  Not ranked amongst Best Abs.”  Even his razor thin loss to Kid Karisma in the Best Butt category merely inflamed Cameron’s outrage, prompting him to demand a recount.  Personally, I think it’s a stroke of pure genius that Cameron has apparently been inspired by this miscarriage of justice to commit himself to earning the title of Best Heel of 2013.  I’m wholeheartedly ready for him to earn my vote!

Eli Black won nearly everything he was nominated for… and still he’s pissed!
Even the overwhelming winners at the polls seem a little irked at some of the subtleties of the voting and commentary.  I received this extensive text rant from Eli Black early yesterday morning, I’m sure at least in part in response to my gentle critique that Lon’s abs might merit more credit than Eli’s:

Trying to provoke Eli?!!!!! My abs are the very best abs in the wrestling seen these days!!!! 100% American Muscle!!!!! The votes were rigged!!!!! I won them all! I am the face wherever I go, hence why I am Mr. Primus, and I shutdown any compotition around me!!! Austin Cooper?!!! Kid Karisma?!!! For get about it! Eli Black all the way! I’m the champ, and no one’s dethroning me. End of story. My abs are chiseled by God himself!!!!! Picture perfect! No one else could even hold my jock strap!!!!! You people like to forget this is Eli Black’s world – y’all just live in it!

Hard to argue with, isn’t it?  The mountain of exclamation points alone sort of beat you into submission similarly to the vicious beatings that Eli’s been pounding into the bodies of his opponents as of late.  And seriously, what’s to argue with?  Coop fans may want to quibble with the implication that Austin’s Wrestler Spotlight shouldn’t have garnered more votes than Eli’s.  And I’m first in line to raise a skeptical eyebrow at Eli’s suggestion that his truly astonishingly gorgeous ass is definitively superior to the world class glutes that belong to Best Butt winner Kid Karisma.  But Eli has a way about him of being so… persuasive.  And I’d give my left testicle for a chance to see Kid K and Eli go ass-on-ass in the ring until one of them is, literally, submissively holding the winner’s sweat soaked jock strap.  But scoring wins as Best Debut of 2012, Best Abs, and starring in the Best Mat Battle of the year, it’s hard to miss the ring of stark truth in Eli’s words: It’s Eli’s world, people.  We just live in it!

A nod to the fans: Cameron Matthews is one of the many homoerotic wrestlers who appreciates being appreciated

Honestly, even with Eli’s full court press of a rebuttal to the poll results and my needling, every wrestler I’ve heard from has clearly taken the year end poll as a good bit of fun that they’re happy to be part of.  And I love that about this community!  Mix in homoeroticism, fanatical lust, larger than life personalities, drop dead gorgeous bodies, and a healthy dose of humor, and 2012 goes down in my book as a banner year for BG East and the entire homoerotic wrestling industry.

Enjoy

There are less than 12 hours for you to register your votes in BG East’s Best of 2012 poll, so get to it!  My last post, urging you to fulfill your civic duty and vote, generated some consternation from a couple of folks concerned about my electioneering.  I hear your concern, and I respect it.  But I humbly point out, this isn’t rocket science.  Have some fun with it, my friends.  Campaign for your favorites.  Enlist random friends to sign up and stuff the ballot box with your slate of picks.  Lighten up and enjoy.  It’s homoerotic wrestling, after all, and if there’s anything that should guide us in reflecting on it, it’s enjoyment.

Rio’s Bad Day: Nominee for Best Spotlight Release of 2012

More to the point, we the electorate can’t really go wrong in this one.  Unlike national elections for public office, it’s not like there’s any one potential candidate who could rip apart the fabric of civil society.  To assist, not to campaign, let’s take a look at the nominees for best abs as they appeared in 2012 releases.  Seriously, there is no “wrong” choice to be made (and you can select a write-in candidate).  So have at it!

And the nominees for Best Abs of 2012 are…

Eli Black
Austin Cooper
Alexi Adamov
Lon Dumont

Jake Jenkins 

Your Civic Duty

There’s no category for most phenomenal forearms, but you can vote for Jonny Firestorm as  Best Heel of 2012.

I’m still recovering from a wrenched neck, but I wanted to broadcast loud and clear your moral imperative to vote in the currently (and briefly!) running, first ever (I believe), BG East year-end review fan poll.  We have 14 categories to vote for our favorites of the 2012 BG East releases, and the decisions are brutal, I tell you!  I just submitted my ballot, and I found it seriously tough to pick from the extremely fine field of contenders.  The Best Bulge category alone took me about 20 minutes to painstakingly research, because how do you decide between the pendulous packages of Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), pretty Pete Sharp, Jobe Zander, Dylon Roberts, and Gabriel Ross!?  I don’t want to unduly influence the democratic process, so I’ll try to refrain from telling you who to vote for (though, seriously, people, check out my first day of Christmas present before you register your vote for Best Butt!).

For your consideration: Kid Karisma is up for Top Heel and Best Butt

This blog is also abundantly quoted in the year end celebration from BG East in which they announced the poll.  I feel like I say it a lot, but it bears repeating, the boys at BG East (both in front of and behind the cameras) are true friends of neverland, not just because they produce the top tier homoerotic wrestling products available, but also because they indulge me with permissions to use their copyrighted materials.  And most importantly, they’re just good guys… generous, understanding, and having just as much fun making these wrestling fantasies happen as you and I enjoy consuming them.  Whoever comes out on top of the polls, BG East is chocked full of winners in my book.

Lon Dumont is nominated for Top Heel, Best Abs, Best Butt, AND Best Body!

Now go vote, because polls close this Sunday, January 20, midnight EST.  And if you do want me to tell you who to vote for, just ask.

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas, Santa Brought to Me…

On the first day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Kid Karisma’s picture perfect ass.

On the second day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Ben Monaco’s luscious, furry pecs.
On the third day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Steel Muscle God’s tree trunk thighs.
On the fourth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Skip and Christian’s wrestling romance.
On the fifth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Darius’ muscle-packed trunks.
On the sixth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Kid Vicious’ domineering sneer.
On the seventh day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Lon Dumont’s insanely ripped back.
On the eighth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Mason Brook’s intoxicating nipples.
On the ninth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Cage Thunder’s mouthwatering cock.
On the tenth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Drake Marcos’ wrestling kinked smile.
On the eleventh day of Christmas, Santa brought to me Jonny Firestorm’s gorgeously sculpted forearms.
“On the twelfth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me…”
The final wish I whispered into Santa’s ear felt like possibly the most daring fantasy of all.  I was incredibly fortunate to get to spend about half a day with a certain homoerotic wrestling god about a year and a half ago.  The master of the house, this iconic heel turned wrestling producer showered generous hospitality on me, showing me every corner of BG East headquarters where many of my fondest wrestling fantasies have taken place.  Near the end of my visit, he invited me to join him as he sat down at his computer and pulled up the unedited photos of the upcoming BG East catalog (Catalog 89).  I stood behind his chair, looking over he shoulder as he clicked through literally hundreds of pics, zipping past most, and then pausing to soak in a particularly titillating shot.  “Mmmmm,” he’d mutter appreciatively, “look at that!”  A photo of Mitch Colby’s hot muscled bod draped helplessly across the top turnbuckle, about to be battered by big Vlad Varek made my host groan and made my cock ache.  I got the first outside glimpse of masked mountain of muscle Magnus force feeding his monster cock to fellow rookie Surge, to the soundtrack of my host letting out a little gasp of pleasure as he paused on a shot from behind Magnus, dwarfing his opponent, as Surge’s hands worshipfully cupped Magnus’ massive glutes.  My host would fly through dozens of photos and then something would catch his eye, and when he paused on a shot long enough for me to soak it in, I’d see it.  A particularly sexy angle, a display of exquisitely tortured muscle, an incredibly hot grimace of agony or sadistic, sexy leer. His taste, his eye for what speaks most directly to my own homoerotic wrestling kink, was astonishing to witness, and his commentary as much as the graphics left me slightly dizzy and hard a rock.  With that memory crystal clear in my mind, I whispered to Santa, I want to see just a glimpse of what he sees.  And on the twelfth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me an entire collection of what catches the eye of the man who has pretty much defined my homoerotic wrestling kink, an astonishingly beautiful montage of moments directly from the desk of Kid Leopard.
Dawn breaks over the lake at BG East.
Skrapper rolls out of bed, ready for a day of wrestling
Drowsy Christian Taylor looks for breakfast, with pretty Pete Sharp in the background
“The irrepressible Lon Dumont” saddles up to the counter with his gorgeous recruit, pretty Pete Sharp
“Since you like bespectacled wrestlers,” the note from KL says, “here Nick Rush laces up beside a contemplative Lon Dumont prior to their match with Austin & Jake.”
Beauty, grace, power: Jake Jenkins takes to the air
Stunningly handsome and beautifully proportioned: All-American Austin Cooper

Bespectacled (thus extra hot) Lorenzo Lowe looks like the meat sandwiched between Jonny Firestorm and Kid Vicious
Lobolito watches as Drake texts illicit photos to neverland

Canadian Beef: The Boss included in his bundle of Christmas presents this never before seen (but much anticipated) preview of Ben Monaco and a new massive, hairy muscle beast due out in the next BG East catalog!
News Flash: Liam Ryan is bearded, bulked up, and ready for one of the most epic returns to BG East wrestling ever in 2013!

Did Kid Leopard’s eye for homoerotic wrestling mold my tastes, or does he simply have instinctive insight into what turns me on?  Either way, like Santa, Kid Leopard is an incredibly generous friend of neverland, and his generosity and genius continue to turn me on like nobody else can!

On the Seventh Day of Christmas, Santa Brought to Me…

Honestly, I was not expecting my tenure on a big, bear daddy’s lap to be so productive (and I’m not talking about Santa’s unmistakable boner that he grew as I whispered my Christmas wish list in his ear).  For the first day of Christmas, big papa Nick brought me a photo shoot of Kid Karisma’s ass that still makes my knees buckle.  On the second day of Christmas, Santa brought me the big, furry pecs of Canuck rookie Ben Monaco flexing especially for me.  On the third day, he brought me the steel muscled legs of Steel Muscle God to enshrine and worship.  On the fourth day of Christmas, Santa brought me a little wrestling romance in the form of some tender moments shared between the lovely royal couple of homoerotic wrestling, Skip Vance and Christian Taylor.  On the fifth day of Christmas, he brought me a very mouthwatering bulge of muscles that Darius can’t quite squeeze into his gear.  And on the sixth day, Santa shocked the pants off of me (literally) by not only finally getting me in touch with Kid Vicious, who’s been in my sights for an interview for over 6 months, but also sending some late breaking insider news of upcoming KV releases as well as some of the choicest shots of that outstanding cum-inducing sneer on the Vicious One’s face! Clearly, I’ve been a very, very good boy, and if this sort of haul is what I get for just sitting on the big man’s lap, next year I’ll offer to polish his North Pole!  What else could make these 12 days of Christmas as titillating as the first 7?
“On the seventh day of Christmas, Santa brought to me…”
I had an instant and non-stop crush on a certain Nor’easter pro wrestler turned homoerotic ring god from the moment I saw the camera fade in on the sight of him flexing in the BG East ring in preparation for his first match with the company.  There’s not an inch on this man that fails to turn me on, and not an inch I wouldn’t like to see a whole lot more of!  But I have to admit, that afternoon at the mall that I sat on Santa’s lap, I had just seen Tag Team Torture 15 and drooled all over myself when I saw this certain competitive bodybuilder turn his back to the camera and flex his insanely shredded back as he nearly ripped the head off of his completely outmatched musclebunny face opponent.  With that toasty image fresh on my mind, I included on my wish list a little pro wrestling bodybuilder fix, and on the seventh day of Christmas, I found under my quickly shedding tree none other than the current top contender to spank my first day of Christmas present, showing off the anatomy chart of back that could belong to no one other than Lon Dumont!
First, a shot of Lon’s brutally striated back muscles on stage, tanned and oiled, and making the judges gasp.
Then an up close pic of of the superhuman proportions and conditioning that leave me quivering in a pool of body fluids.  These wings can fly, my friends, and this testament to fierce perseverance and a singular focus on physical perfection, when paired with the snarling, trash talking mouth and unparalleled sell of a seasoned pro wrestler, is what makes me president of the Lon Dumont fan club and devotedly grateful to Santa and Lon for making this particular wish come true!
And just because Lon is a outrageously generous as he is scorchingly hot, he also sent along this jaw dropping shot of his serratus and obliques to drain me that much drier.  Damn, I need a job as this man’s pro-tan applicator!
And in case you haven’t seen those luscious latissimus dorsi doing what they do best, here they are making musclebunny Jake Jenkins scream like a bitch in Tag Team Torture 15 (a MUST own, LD fans)!  POW!

…So Let’s Keep Rocking and Rolling

Not long after my recent post describing exactly what Blaine Janus and Mason Brooks did to me in their intensely sexy Gazebo Grapplers 14 throw down, I found this snapshot in my inbox along with this adorable note:
“Just wanted to say thanks for the nice write-up
 and I’m glad you enjoyed watching the match
as much as I enjoyed filming it! – Mason”
After licking my computer screen a few times, I quickly replied, and using my famous powers of persuasion (which admittedly involve a whole lot of sincere flattery), I got Mason to agree to chat with me a bit about being one of the new kids on the BG East block.  In some ways, the interview that follows picks up right where my interview with Ben Monaco left off yesterday.  Young Mason had me rolling on the floor in laughter one minute and then needing to rearrange my crotch the next minute with his razor sharp wit and extremely sexy insights into how he approaches launching an on-camera homoerotic wrestling career.  So let me be the first to introduce you to this sultry, sexy, suprisingly sinister Southern boy who, I predict, very well could take BG East by storm.
Bard: Fantastic to hear from you, Mason! And damn, boy, really, really thanks for the photo! If you enjoyed filming that match even half as much as I enjoyed watching it, I hope you had a few days to rehydrate because you and Blaine certainly wore me out. Can I share your pic on the blog? And can I start peppering you with questions “on the record?”

Mason Brooks: 5’9″, 150 lbs.

Mason: [Laughing] Please, feel free to share. I am getting in touch with my inner exhibitionist. And I’d be happy to answer your questions.

Bard: You’ve definitely got to let that inner exhibitionist out. A lot! Consider us on the record, and talk to me about your nipples (which is something I’ve never said in an interview before!). Blaine cannot keep his hands off of them. Ben Monaco privately commented to me that your nipples are “to die for.” Ben’s words were, “I know it. He knows it. That’s where he’s going to get his fans.” And I have to tell you, you’ve got seriously hot nips! What sort of “gay wrestling catnip” do you use on them to turn us all on like that!?

Mason: Well, gee, this is a first for me as well. It’s funny, aside from the piercing, which obviously gets a fair amount of attention, I’ve never thought of my nipples as a standout attribute of mine. I mean, maybe my hair, my smile, my eyes–the list goes on, as you might imagine. I guess all those dips and push-ups while watching Honey Boo Boo this summer paid off. Seriously, though, if everyone is as taken with them as Mr. Monaco, I think I’m set. He really couldn’t help himself all weekend. Not that I’m complaining, of course. If a little nipple-tweaking was my BG East initiation, I guess I got off easy. It is strange, though, that they seem to have such an effect on Canadians. It was chilly that weekend, and the cold air does seem to perk those boys up. Sort of like my nips.  Not sure about the gay wrestling catnip (although that sounds like something I need in my stocking this Christmas). Actually, just a little neosporin now and then to keep the piercing in working order, especially if someone’s had his, umm, hands all over it.

Blaine had his… hands… all over Mason’s nips.

Bard: There’s just so much material there in your answer that I’m almost speechless. Almost. So yes, let me just confirm that I’m in a growing line of guys who clearly find your nipples extremely alluring. Next, please let me also confirm that your hair, smile, and eyes are also very, very attractive, but I’ll be damned if there’s a BG East fan who’ll rip his eyes away from your hot pecs to say much more about your eyes. And finally, I’m profoundly disturbed to recognize within myself that the image of you doing dips and push-ups while watching Honey Boo Boo just completely gave me wood. My therapist and I are going to have a lot to talk about next week…. But dragging myself back on topic… as I mentioned in my review of your match with Blaine, you certainly caught me off guard. I was totally expecting to see an earnest, babyface-in-wrestling-singlet bound to be another naive rook about to be awakened to the dark truth of homoerotic wrestling at the hands of a master. Then like a cruise missile you almost instantly locked Blaine down, completely immobilized him, and went straight for a crotch claw. There’s no way in hell you’ll convince me that that was your first dance, Mason! That was an accomplished hand that so confidently, simultaneously crushed Blaine’s testicles and worked him into a drooling lather. Where have you wrestled before, and how much will I pay to see your rip-n-strip archives?

Mason sees what’s he wants and goes for it.

Mason: Okay, I must confess, this was not my first dance. I’ve done my fair share of wrestling, in and out of a singlet, and learned the ropes, as they say. None on video, unfortunately. As far as I know….  But maybe, just maybe, I enjoy it when people see my cute, innocent face and underestimate me. I think it gives me an advantage when I surprise them with my skills.  More than that, though, I’m the kind of guy who sees what he wants and goes for it. You saw him, parading his freckled cheeks around in that little see-through number.  how could I not pounce on that? Yeah, if anyone thought I was a pushover, they were in for a rude awakening.

Bard: You, my new friend, are one seriously devious little devil! I’d love to get Blaine’s take on this, but my impression is just that: he completely underestimated you. I strongly suspect that your (now) obviously misleading shy grin and a strong resemblance to Edward Norton could throw plenty of opponents off stride right around the time that you rip them apart at the crotch and claw their balls with abandon. In light of the horrific tragedy that your earlier wrestling in/out of a singlet was not captured on video, I hope BG East signed you up for many more matches to come. Having toyed, dangerously, with fluorescent blue-eyed, freckle faced, horny-toad Blaine, have you seen anything else at BG East that you hope to “go for” in the future?

“Gabriel Ross is lucky I had a plane to catch…”

Mason: You know, I’ll gladly take on (and take down) whomever they want to throw at me. Christian, Skip, Len, Lorenzo–I think all those boys need to get a taste, and I’m ready to give it to ’em, any time. The big muscleboys–gosh, I can never keep all their names straight–they don’t scare me either. And Gabriel Ross is lucky I had a plane to catch, or he would have been next on my list. I don’t care how much he bulked up, that little wanker would have ended up with a faceful of my balls. Though I’m not sure how mean I could be to him–that smile is pretty killer. As it happens, all I got to do was hug him goodbye. And cop a feel, of course.

Bard: I really, really like the sound of hotties like Lorenzo Lowe getting “thrown” at you. It makes me picture you in the ring with boys flying off the ropes, and I hope we see you in the ring soon. And as for muscleboys, I suspect that with the performance you posted against Blaine and the smack talk you’re laying down here, there could be some big muscleboys eager to get their hands on your pecs and/or your balls in their face. Personally, I’d like to take up a collection to buy Gabriel a ticket back just to see how “that little wanker” would fare in the matroom against you. It would be like a battle of the angelic babyface badboys, which sounds like a fantastic theme for a collection of matches! So if you were ever to find yourself sleepered out cold at the end of another sweaty, raunchy barnburner like you suffered at the hands of Blaine Janus, who would you prefer to wake up with his tongue shoved down your throat: Lorenzo Lowe, Ben Monaco, or Kid Karisma? In other words, twink, hunk, or muscleboy?

“Lorenzo sounds mighty nice.”

Mason: Hmmm, twink, hunk or muscleboy.  Is that like boff, marry, kill? It all depends on my mood, I suppose. (Sometimes you feel like a nut, and all that, right?) I wouldn’t kick any of those boys out of the ring for eating crackers, but right now I must be in a twink mood, because Lorenzo sounds mighty nice. Of course, he’d be the one getting sleepered out and waking up to me on top of him…

Lorenzo’s tongue ALSO seems irresistibly drawn toward Mason’s pecs (photo courtesy of Ben Monaco).

Bard: Well I saw a certain behind the scenes shot from Ben where you were sitting next to Lorenzo sans any pants, and you were sporting an awfully pleased grin on your face. I’m now officially advocating to see that grin on your face in a match with Lorenzo as he groggily rouses from your sleeper finisher to find your lips descending over his. Speaking of boff, marry, kill: Justin Bieber, Justin Theroux, and Justin Timberlake?

Boff. Marry. Kill.

Mason: Oh fun! Okay, first of all, my well-documented affection for Canadian boys notwithstanding, I would kill Justin Bieber, no question. Although I suspect that in a couple years, once the screaming girls have moved on and he’s still spindly and pale and the wrong side of 25, some combination of drugs and alcohol will do the job for me. Justin Timberlake’s never done that much for me, personally, but I guess I’d give him a whirl in bed. Don’t think I could marry him, though. His fashion sense irks me too much. (Ooh, you’re wearing a tweed vest and a fedora? Neato.) So that leaves Justin Theroux to marry, which sounds about right. I mean, if he’s good enough for the co-star of “Leprechaun,” he’s good enough for me. Nah, I’m kidding, he’s hot, I think we’d hit it off. As long as he’s into wrestling, that is. He seems like an interesting guy, but very serious. Eventually I’d get tired of exploring our feelings and I’d need to give those abs a working over. Wouldn’t that make a great tabloid headline? “Jen’s Heartbreak: Justin Caught with Wrestling Boy-toy.” Oh well, a boy-toy can dream….

Another wicked smart wrestling hunk:
Lon Dumont

Bard: I couldn’t agree with you more on all counts. And I can start that Justin Theroux rumor and see where it leads… never know. Damn, he’s hot. So you’ve got good hair, gorgeous pecs, magical nipples, AND insanely insightful taste in men? Damn, you’re going far! Did you have the opportunity to meet a long-standing favorite infatuation of mine when you were in Pembroke: Lon Dumont? I think you two would hit it off. You both seem particularly quick-witted and self-reflective. And he’s a god in the wrestling ring, so you can’t go wrong chumming up to Lon! Wrestling + smarts = Bard-is-infatuated. What haven’t you done yet in homoerotic wrestling that you’re itching to try out? Any particular moves, venues, gear, etc?

Mason: I did meet Lon Dumont, but just briefly. I think he was pretty busy in the ring, and I may have been headed to wash Blaine out of my hair (figuratively speaking, of course). Sounds like I should get to know him, though. I could always use a few pointers in the ring to add to my skills on the mat. What am I itching to try? You know, I’m always open to new things, especially if they make my butt look good. So, I dunno…rip and strip, oil, mud, jello? See, now I’m getting hungry. Oh, and I probably shouldn’t say too much, but it’s possible that in my next match we’ll get a little…wet?

Mail your boxes of Jello c/o Mason Brooks to:
BG East, PO Box 172, Pembroke, MA 02359

Bard: I hope you had help in the shower! Yeah, I think you and Lon could make for a very dangerous combination. If you two got your heads together, I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that there’s been a major coup at BG East with you two running the show. And as for what we should expect next from you, I LOVE the sound of “wet!” And I’m even crazier for the words “oil, mud, and jello.” How incredibly old school sexy of you! I know a whole lot of wrestling fans who would blow a gasket for a rip-n-strip jello wrestling match, or a classic oil wrestling throw down. I think the time has come for those vintage genres to come back in vogue as retro-chic, and I love that you’re ready to be at the front of that line. But really, is there anything that doesn’t make your butt look good? So I think you know that I’ve also recently interviewed Ben Monaco, and Ben referred to you as “quiet and polite” to the point of being eligible to be an honorary Canadian. Has he ever actually met you?! I mean, sure, maybe you’re a little more reserved in person that you have been during this interview, but seriously… honorary Canadian!? Are you stringing him along, playing coy, in order to blow him away on the mats? Is this some sinister master plan building off of that dimple in your cheek and twinkle in your eye to lull another potential opponent into underestimating you?

Has Ben even met Mason!?

Mason: Honorary Canadian, huh? That would be quite an honor. I like hockey, beer, and flannel, and I know “O Canada” in English and French–still working on Inuktitut–so I think I’m halfway there already. I just hope the initiation ceremony involves Tyler Seguin shirtless and lots of maple syrup. As for quiet and polite, I can see how people assume that when they first meet me. I like to size up a room first, see who I’m dealing with. And hey, if people assume I’m innocent and harmless, that’s their problem. Plus I’m from the south, so yeah, probably I do have some manners deep down inside, along with a knack for making killer fried chicken. But I’m not so polite on the mat, as Mr. Monaco ought to know by now.

Bard: I’m adding “maple syrup” to the list of media within which you should wrestle. And it sounds like you’re more than halfway to Canuck-hood, eh? What part of the South are you from, and what percentage of the time that you wrestled with Ben did he spend sucking on your nipples?

Just like wrestling the pig farmer’s son!

Mason: I’m from a rural part of Virginia, where I’m pretty sure some folks are still fighting the Civil War. Very pretty country, but not much to do, unless you wanna wrestle a pig. On the other hand, sometimes you get into the Wild Turkey and end up wreslin’ the pig farmer’s son behind the barn. And that ain’t so bad. What else? Oh, right, nipples. Always with the nipples. As I recall, there was more pinching and tweaking going on than sucking, but it’s all a blur. A thoroughly enjoyable blur. Perhaps Mr. Monaco has a more vivid recollection, or maybe he was just daydreaming about the things he’d like to do with my sweaty chest.

Bard: You make pig farmer wrestling sound hotter than I’d ever have guessed! Ben was entirely mum about any activities you may have gotten up to. The nipple sucking was just my wishful thinking, though perhaps I’ve seeded the ground for future opponents you might face. I can hope. Well, Mr. Brooks, I’m convinced that we will be seeing a lot more of you in the future, based on your debut in Gazebo Grapplers 14 and your readiness to face all comers and all viscous substances. I predict that you’re going to have a big fan club, starting with nipple-obsessed Canadians and jello wrestling fans, but quickly branching out from there. Is there anything else you’d like to say to BG East fans who are about to discover that they’re Mason Brooks fanatics?

Quiet, polite, Southern boys:
probably nastier than you think.

Mason: Yeah, in the immortal words of Dirk Diggler, I’ll keep trying if you keep trying so let’s keep rocking and rolling. (Sweet jeebus, I loved that movie.) Seriously, though, I just hope the fans out there enjoy watching my matches as much as I enjoy making them, ’cause the whole experience was a blast, and I can’t wait to do it again. Oh, and watch out for quiet, polite, Southern boys–they’re probably nastier than you think.

Bard: True story: Boogie Nights is one of Lon Dumont’s favorite flicks. I kid you not. I’ve already seen quite a bit of chatter that fans are lining up for more of Mason Brooks, so we’re going to do our part. And personally, I’m hoping that there are plenty of hunks at BG East who will decidedly not take your advice about watching out for polite, quiet Southern boys, because I can’t wait to see the look of shock on their faces when you let loose. This was a true pleasure getting to chat with you! Thanks for your time, and I hope we can do this again. I’m strongly convinced that you could go very, very far in this business, and I’m not just saying that because of your entrancing nipples.

Mason: The pleasure was mine, and thank you so much for the kind words. The nipples and I are flattered.

Mason Brooks and his nipples.