Tag: Darius

Heel = Jobber [Guest Blogger: Alex]

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In trying to help Bard with content, I have discovered that writing for a blog is difficult. Maybe I just don’t have that much to say. One of my limitations is that I don’t watch nearly as much wrestling as others. So today, I’m going to flip the script and ask you a question. I’ll seek your advice and perspective.

I admit it. I liked Barry Horowitz, with his pulled-too-high trunks and back patting antics. Barry, Reno Riggins, Brooklyn Brawler … these are just some of the guys who I don’t think I ever saw win a match, but I found their arrogance and optimism oddly appealing.
Sure, Brawler, you’re going to be the one to defeat Tatanka. Good luck with that.
While face jobbers are required to look scared, weak and may not even mount any offense, heel jobbers start out with unearned confidence, a bag of dirty tricks (that are doomed to fail) and manage to get in a few licks before the inevitable ending.
So, are there any really good heel jobbers right now?

It’s a real question. Maybe there are and I don’t know it. As I said, I don’t watch a ton of wrestling these days, so there could be. There are definitely heels who lose occasionally, especially against other heels, but I’m wondering about a strong guy who walks in wearing black, talking tough then gets beat down by the talented face. Are there any who lose with Darius-level consistency? Are there any who maintain, rather than suppress, their inherent heel-ness while losing? Is there a heel equivalent of Braden Charron?

What if Darius wore black instead of pastel blue?

What if Braden wrapped his muscles in leather instead of the flag?

These guys could still job, but they’d job with an attitude. They’d go down to the man in white and pink, still mouthing off until they lost consciousness. I have to say that I have seen this from Aryx Quinn, but not sure if there are others.

Does it happen? Is the idea even appealing? I’d love to hear thoughts.

On the Fifth Day of Christmas, Santa Brought to Me…

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To recap, on the first four days of Christmas a surprisingly game bear daddy of a Santa checked off 4 of my fondest Christmas wishes by bringing me crotch-warming candid pics of my very favorite assets of homoerotic wrestling favorites, namely Kid Karisma’s world class ass, Ben Monaco’s flexed, furry pecs, Steel Muscle God’s bone crushing legs, and a little wrestling romance shared between real life partners Christian Taylor and Skip Vance.  Santa’s readiness to fill my most lustful desires is turning me steadily into a hardcore mature bear daddy fan (at least seasonally)!  I was already adjusting my morning wood as I sprinted down the stairs this morning to find what Santa brought me for the fifth day of Christmas.  Oh, holy night of homoerotic wrestling wonders…!
“On the fifth day of Christmas, Santa brought to me…”
Frankly, I had struggled to nail down precisely which assets to ask for when I was whispering in Santa’s ear my hearts desire for some personalized pic fantasies of a certain “Magnificent Black Muscle God” who’s had his sights set on testing the mettle of my third day of Christmas gift.  What’s not to obsessively lust over!?  Finally, I just stammered, “Everything that he stuffs in his trunks.”  Santa nodded and winked like the knowing horndog he is, and this morning I discovered the big man set me up on this fifth day of Christmas with a montage of pretty much every angle of the most mouthwatering muscles of all stuffed inside a lovely variety of gear squeezed onto the pounding physique of BG East’s muscle star, Darius!
Tie a bow on that gorgeous purple-wrapped package!

Next Christmas I’m asking for the trunks!
The wrapping may change color, but that Yule Log remains stunningly gorgeous!
Holy fucking Christmas miracle!  Please, oh please Santa, next deliver those glutes sitting on the face of a wrestling opponent!!!
I have to think that should Darius show up in the BG East ring wearing this gear, he’ll bring opponents to their knees!

There is no angle from which Darius’ tastiest muscles fail to make me swoon!

The proportions on Darius bring a tear to my eye!
What a wondrous sight: Darius’ muscles laid out so vulnerably once an opponent has sleepered him out cold!

A special Christmas wish granted: a private wrestling pic of Darius massive bulge helplessly on display.
Darius is another new friend of this blog in 2012 who loves pleasing his fans nearly as much as he loves testing all of those massive muscles against a wrestling opponent.  And like Santa, Darius’ generosity blows me away with both lust and gratitude!  Hope to see much more of you in 2013, Darius!
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Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

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Austin Wolf’s reign as homoerotic wrestler of the month has been a wild one, no doubt, but it’s time to kick his fine, fine ass off the throne to make room for one of the army of beautiful boys who, unlike Austin, posted a new release in homoerotic wrestling during the month of November.  The field is always deepest when BG East releases a catalog, and that’s the case this time around.  Among the notable contenders from BG East’s catalog 96 is newly minted muscle bunny, Gabriel Ross from X-Fights 34, as well as former HWOTM and long-time reigning favorite around here, pendulous Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) for Demolition 15.  It should come as no surprise to recent readers that Gazebo Grapplers 14 presents a bevy of beautiful contenders, including rookies Pete Sharp and friend of this blog Mason Brooks, as well as former HWOTM Christian Taylor, veteran erotic master  Blaine Janus, and the visually stunning pair of hairy hunks Ben Monaco and Damien Rush.  I haven’t discussed Muscle Madness 1 yet around here, but damn, did you see sex-wrestler and monster muscleman Magnus have his way with big, beautiful Chace LaChance!?  Former HWOTM Z-Man also posts a hot performance with frequent contender Rio Garza, and both Trent Blayze and Darius work up so much heat between them that my computer mouse even got hot! Two former HWOTM went head to head in some of the most visually beautiful images I’ve ever seen when Lon Dumont brought a long a rookie to put a glorious beatdown on barefoot beauties Jake Jenkins and Austin Cooper for Tag Team Torture 15. From Sunshine Shooters 5, I was deep down turned on by the Dorian Gray-esque Patrick Donovan and massive stud Dev Michaels, as well as current reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler overall Kid Karisma, making it hurt so sweetly with sexy Brit Mike Martin.  Finally, Ethan Axel making his BG East debut getting incredibly hot and bothered and ripped and stripped with Mason Brooks’ infatuation, Lorenzo Lowe in Gloved Gladiators 5. Amazing depth from BG East!  But of course, they aren’t the only ones putting out chart topping matches in November.  I’m wildly happy to see what Braden Charron gets up to against hot rookie Ken in Thunders Arena’s Mat Rats 29.  And I love the look of Can-Am’s Bobby Blake volunteering to get DeCrotcheried by cockmaster Jobe Zander.  And on the muscle worship scene, did you catch Steel Muscle God going flex to flex and bearhug to bearhug against fellow internet/youtube sensation Connor?  Wowza! And finally, Rock Hard Wrestling released Superstar Showdown, pitting former HWOTM Jake Jenkins squaring off against his very same tag team partner from BG East’s new release Tag Team Torture 15, goldenboy Austin Cooper.

So much quality.  So much sweat.  So many hours in November devoted to sucking the juice out of each and every one of these contenders!  But my task I’ve set for myself is to appoint only one to laud as the homoerotic wrestler of the month this time around.  And that hunk is….

Trent Blayze: 6’1″, 195 lbs

This choice catches me by surprise.  I know, I know.  It’s my choice, but still, I surprise myself sometimes.  I was all set to tap a different power hitter when I sat down to give my due diligence to Trent and Darius’ match in Muscle Madness 1.  And even then, I was really vetting Darius for the title based on his stills and what he’s managed to do to me when I’ve watched his previous matches.  And no doubt, Darius is insanely beautiful in this match.  His ass alone deserves some sort of award.  He sells like a champ.  I love me some Darius in the ring!  But holy hell, I was blown away by Trent Blayze!

Darius was always going to outmuscle Trent in above board competition.

Trent establishes character 5 seconds after climbing into the ring.  Darius extends a hand as an offer of good sportsmanship, which Trent slaps away in disgust.  Trent admires himself, flexing in the mirror and taunting his famously muscled opponent.  “Look at that! Hmmm?  What about that!”  Darius quickly steps side-by-side and demonstrates why he’s not one to challenge in a muscle comparison.  “Is this what we’re here for!” Darius smirks.  Trent is big and beautiful, don’t get me wrong.  He’s a champion sweat machine, and I’m a sucker for pools of perspiration.  But a side-by-side double bicep next to Darius?  Come on!  The arm wrestling challenge seems similarly unlikely.  The veins in Darius’ huge arms pop.  He toys with this kid briefly, then easily knocks out a right-handed victory like nothing.  Left-handed goes no better for Trent, who shows exactly what he thinks of sportsmanship by launching a sneak attack and bashing Darius’ mouthwatering muscles.

Trent looks awfully tasty from every angle!

Trent keeps leveling the playing field with cheap shots that lay Darius out cold, setting the stage for muscle man Darius to flex all those maddening muscles to power his way back on top.  Every time Darius digs deep and pumps himself back into contention, I’m stroked harder.  A few minutes in and I’m thinking this is Darius in the spotlight, not big, tattooed Southern boy Trent.  Darius’ body on offense and getting pummeled in the corner are such a feast!  But holy hell, there’s some point I can’t quite put my finger on in the middle of this match that I suddenly recognize that I’m totally infatuated with every inch of 6’1″ Trent.

That sweaty, tattooed, muscled back is so fucking HOT!

I’m pretty sure whatever that moment is, it happens when Trent’s back is to the camera, because this kid’s back is incredible.  Backs aren’t always my fixation, of course.  Often it’s a bit lower where my eyes are wandering when a wrestling stud turns his back to the camera, and Trent’s sweet, powerful ass is entirely fixation-worthy.  But no, it’s his back itself.  Big, brought, muscled, tattooed, and very quickly shining with a self-replenishing coat of sweat.  Gorgeous, simply gorgeous!

“That feels good, don’t it!?”

There’s nothing bad at all about the front, either.  He’s got an incredibly sexy way of snarling to one side, like he’s got a shaft of straw in the other side of his mouth.  And maybe it’s just Mason Brook’s warning that quiet, polite Southern boys are probably nastier than you think.  There’s both an understated quality about Trent and a deep, dangerous nastiness there, too, growling out from deep in his chest in that hot, sexy drawl.  There’s lots of “how’s that feel?  That feels good, don’t it!?”  juxtaposed against Darius mouth hanging open in silent agony.  Trent rips apart Darius’ mighty pecs fiber by fiber, digging his fingers in deep and clawing savagely.

Trent swims in his own sweat and showers a withering Darius.

There’s corner these boys turn where you know Darius is once again going down in a musclebashing feast for the eyes.  There’s another 15 minutes left, and the main course on this menu is meaty Darius getting carved up and served raw.  I was prepared to be captured by the iconic sight of a big, powerful musclestud broken to bits and wailing helplessly.  But I wasn’t prepared for how incredibly irresistible I found Trent’s work on top, maintaining the pace of this match, carrying the story forward like a bona fide heel.  He makes a seamless transition from blasting Darius’ quivering mass he calls his pecs to brutalizing the bodybuilder’s back by ripping one last pec claw while simultaneously holding Darius in a bulging OTK backbreaker.  Multitasking is so… fucking… sexy!

Bulge-beautiful, muscle torturing crucifix

The corner abuse Trent inflicts is also hot shit.  He yanks upward on Darius’ trunks, using those butt-hugging Adidas to making the muscleman climb the turnbuckles and setting him up for a bulge-beautiful, muscle torturing crucify that leaves incredibly powerful Darius suspended helplessly with his feet nearly two-feet (no shit!) off the mat.  Furious, horrified, humiliated, Darius submits repeatedly until the nasty Southern boy, sweat streaming off his body, finally releases him.

Heavily lubricated victory

Joe’s been a Trent fan since day 1, and it’s not like I’ve ever not liked what I’ve seen.  But the Southern brawler put together a look, an offense, and an attitude in his muscle crunching destruction of Darius that put me way, way over the top.  I’m on the record now and always as saying that any big, beautiful wrestler who literally pours sweat onto their humiliating opponent writhing beneath them will always have the pole position in a HWOTM competition.  Trent not only starts in pole position, he shifts my gears like nobody else this month, earning him my enthusiastic laud as neverland’s newest homoerotic wrestler of the month.

Trent’s happy to be on top!

Dinner Date Chosen

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Cam’s the dinner date of choice!
The commanding winner in the reader’s choice poll to determine which homoerotic wrestler readers would most want to have visit their homes for dinner was none other than wrestling hunk extraordinaire Cameron Mathews.  He crossed the finish line with 36% of the vote, which is a decisive testimony to the loyal fans he’s earned from working that gorgeous bubble butt of his off from coast to coast and production to production over the past decade.  He held steady at or around 50% of the vote through most of the two days that the poll was open, in fact, looking like he was going to blow away his next closest competition by more than double.  However, just this morning, with mere hours left to vote, shit got interesting!
Skip convinces Christian that he’ll show up for dinner with a fan too!
That’s when fierce little scrapper Skip Vance put out a message on Facebook lobbying his fans to mount a come from behind maneuver on Cam (and who among us haven’t fantasized about a come from behind maneuver on Cam!?).  Skip offered one fan selected at random to be treated to a dinner made by his own hands if he ends up on top of the polls once all is said and done.  He instantly got a bump, pulling ahead of Kid Karisma for second place.  When Skip added that both he and former homoerotic wrestler of the month and Skip’s lover, Christian Taylor, would sit down to said dinner with the randomly selected fan, the sprint to the finish line was on! He began to close the distance with Cam at such a pace that I was seriously beginning to suspect a photo finish.  While Cam limped across the line with the decisive victory, nobody was stronger around the last turn than hot and eager Skip! As to whether he’ll still auction off a dinner date, we’ll have to wait and see.

Kid Karisma can’t believe you left him in 3rd place!
Third place winner and party-boy muscle stud Kid Karisma has got to be scratching his head right about now wondering how he not only got outpaced by Cam but blown-by flat footed by late bloomer Skip! Somehow, I’m guessing with his life-of-the-party karisma and astonishingly sexy body (look… at… that… ASS!!!), Kid K has never been short of dinner invitations. If he’s ever in need of a hot meal and adoring company, he’s got a place at my table anytime.  As for restraining myself from putting my hands on those glutes, no promises, Kid K.
Dinner? Steel Muscle God Dan may be too busy being worshipped!
Not surprisingly, Steel Muscle God Dan had a very solid showing in the poll. It’s not surprising because if you spend any time at all at steelmusclegod.com, you pick up on the fact very quickly that Dan’s got a worldwide following of extremely rabid fans who are very, very loyal to SMG.  If he’d put out the call to his worshippers to really mobilize the vote, I strongly suspect he’d have put some hurt on even Cam.  I’m not too worried that SMG’s ego will take a hit for not winning the reader’s choice poll here. He’s got muscles of steel, for god’s sake, and the self-confidence to strip naked and demand to be worshipped.  However, if he’s ever in the neighborhood and feeling peckish, he can take solace in the fact that I’ll be more than happy to set another place at the table.
“A Fabulous Dinner Date!”
Through back channels I was delighted to hear that Lon Dumont had an opinion on the matter.  His opinion was, of course, that he’d make a “fabulous dinner date!”  He also mentioned that since he’s been dieting like a fiend in preparation for the bodybuilding season about to commence any minute, he could seriously put 2nds and 3rds away right now, so plan ahead if you invite him to dinner. Lon knows that he has a standing invitation to my table, and I’m also ever ready to apply his instant tan all over every inch of his body before any and every competition (which wasn’t up for consideration in the poll, but I just wanted to make that point clear).
Not everyone could handle an evening with Eli Black
I’m guessing Eli Black knows full well why he didn’t win.  You were too fucking scared of him! Truth be told, despite his expansive ego and fiercely competitive spirit when it comes to absolutely everything, I just bet that the Shutdown would completely charm the pants off you if you had him over for dinner.  Of course, the poll wasn’t about who you’re ready to take your pants off for, but even keeping my pants on, I’d be delighted and honored to pass Eli the mashed potatoes.
Darius “BMG” is looking for a taste of SMG!
Darius had a solid showing in the poll, reflecting what I happen to know is a loyal base of fans who’ve been wanting to see more of this Black Muscle God – more screen time and more skin! Darius let it be known that he doled out his vote for Steel Muscle God, because despite SMG being a no-show to face Darius stateside, Darius still has his sights set on an epic showdown between the Steel Muscle God and the Black Muscle God. Fuck the poll! I’ll push my furniture to the walls to watch that battle of the gods live!
Is that Chris Isaak? No, it’s hot jobber Ken Canada!
Long-time friend and contributor to this blog, Stay Puft, let it be known that he simply had to register his vote for energizer bunny and possessor of endless hotness and stories of hotness, Ken Canada. He never picked up traction in the polling, but I have to agree with S.P. when he points out that Ken’s sense of humor and enthusiastic understanding of the eroticism of wrestling would make him a truly entertaining dinner date!
Cage Thunder is busy serving up some meat of his own
I happen to know that Cage Thunder registered his vote in the poll for Lon. Get those two bull dozers on the same page and I can’t imagine what tag team would dare step foot in the ring with them.  But around the dinner table, I can’t help but figure that meal would go into the wee hours of the morning as these two profoundly reflective men trade wit and wisdom from never-ending reserves.  Personally, I’m a little astonished Cage Thunder didn’t show better in the polling, and I have to chalk it up to Eli’s theory that there were just a whole lot of you too damn frightened to sit across the table from him.  Not me.  He’s got a standing invitation at chez Bard.

Don’t bother Ben with dinner invitations.  He’s building a wrestling career, people!
The rookie sensation with magical lips, Ben Monaco never managed to build a head of steam in voting.   Big Ben is brand spanking new to the industry, of course, so pitting him against absolute fixtures in homoerotic wrestling like Cameron Mathews was always going to be an uphill battle for him.  My educated guess is that Ben isn’t surprised at all that he wasn’t the top vote-getter, and if anything he’s just that much more eager to plant his hot ass on another opponent’s face and absolutely make you forget all about the rest for a moment and marvel at him as he tests what he’s got against the best at BGE.  Ben knows he’s just at the beginning of an incredibly sexy, demanding journey into our hearts, but as for me I’ve got a casserole and a bottle of wine just waiting for him.

Reader’s Choice Poll – Dinner Date

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When asked which presidential candidate they would prefer to visit their home for dinner, 52% of respondents named President Obama, compared with just 33% of them selecting $omney.  Personally, I think this is the most useless polling question to be asked every four years, but sadly the American electorate seems to consistently prioritize this kind of popularity contest over actual qualifications for leading this country (foreign policy experience? a grasp of the legislative process? the capacity to make life-and-death decisions with regard to the use of military power and weapons of mass destruction?  no, we’re more likely to vote based on who we’d prefer to have dinner with… oy).  That’s enough of my political analysis for today, other than to alert my Swedish readers once again that if Tax-Dodger $omney is elected in November, I expect one of you to sponsor me as a political refugee.
I say let’s save such weighty questions like who we’d prefer to visit our homes for dinner for really important matters, like considering our favorite homoerotic wrestlers.  Sure, dinner table repartee isn’t exactly all that relevant to what compels us most in picking our homoerotic wrestling fare, but I still say it’s more relevant to wrestlers than politicians.  So this reader’s choice poll asks you to consider who you’d most prefer to have over for dinner.  I’m limiting the field to those who’ve demonstrated at least a little of their communication skills by being interviewed on the pages of this blog.  You can nominate someone else in the comments below, but the names on the poll are strictly drawn from the “friends of the blog” on record. This is about the dinner table, mind you.  Don’t base your choice on who’d you prefer to make you suffer in a head scissors in the living room after dinner.  We’re talking about an evening absent of actual wrestling (though of course the dinner conversation is entirely available to muse on the topic).  We’re also not talking about who you want to fuck.  This is an evening in which no semblance of sexual contact is going to happen.  You can decide how to instruct your dinner guests with regard to attire, so you can eye-fuck them across the table all night long, but physical contact is limited to handshakes and, let’s just say, a lingering, full-body hug to say goodnight (no ass squeeze!).  The real question is who would you like sitting across the table from you to talk with, to ask for their insights, to tell them what’s on your mind, to wax philosophical about wrestling or politics or religion or whatever topic the two of you want to talk about.  So that’s the background.  Here are your choices of dinner guests:

Lon Dumont: the first wrestler to grant me an interview a year and a half ago, Lon’s body and wrestling skills have earned him a permanent spot at or very near the top of my favorites ever since I first set eyes on him.  His ring banter was one of the most entertaining and arousing aspects of his work that captured my attention and keeps me coming back for more.  But his interview was a revelation into the diverse passions and thoughtful, open-minded outlook on life that make me think Lon would make an absolutely delightful dinner guest. Topics you would most likely find yourself discussing: bodybuilding, pets, indy wrestling, homoerotic wresting, hairstyles, freedom from religion, and Rocky.

Ken Canda: this classic from the early days of BG East has his picture next to the definition of the phrase: hot jobber.  His wrestling is foundational watching for those with any interest in seeing the evolution of the pro wrestling babyface jobber into an entirely unique and incredibly arousing fixture tailored to the tastes of the gay wrestling kink audience.  No, you DON’T get to pound him in an OTK backbreaker and claw his balls, though under different circumstances, I suspect he may very well be open to it (so save it for your second date).  But as evidenced in his extensive interview on the pages of this blog, Ken is happy to stroll down memory lane and tell you absolutely intoxicating tales of behind the cameras shenanigans from the early days at BGE, including delightful descriptions of every wrestler he faced and just how incredibly arousing it was to be brutalized over and over again.  You will hear about the esprit de corps that forged bonds of brotherhood and homoerotic beauty among the men who truly enjoyed each other’s company on and off camera, as well as the insights of a fellow wrestling kinkster who continues to live and love the eroticism of wrestling whenever he gets the chance.

Kid Karisma: As he explained in our interview last January, there’s a reason the Boss gave him the moniker Kid Karisma! While you won’t have the chance to get your hands on that legendary muscle ass of his over dinner, you can get lost gazing into those baby blues and have your feet swept right out from underneath you (metaphorically) by that sly, sideways grin and a wink from the man who is as charismatic as they come! He’ll entertain you with the extremely hot candid photos he takes with his phone, and just between the two of you, he’s likely to spill all the dirt on the best, baddest, horniest and hottest action to go on behind the scenes at BG East. I recommend not serving your best china, because I’m guessing this insatiable party boy could be dancing on the table before dessert!

Eli Black: a wrestling match with this hot young phenom would put you on your back in a heartbeat, but a no-holds dinner date with the boy wonder would, no doubt, just as surely keep you on your toes.  As I learned first hand in our interview last February, he’s got an in-your-face charm that I personally find completely disarming, but don’t let your defenses down too quickly.  Eli is not a man to be trifled with, and polite chit chat about the weather or the price of tea in China will earn you a withering insult and sneer of contempt.  But if you’re up for a dinner guest who loves a debate, who wants nothing more than to meet the man who’ll give as hard as he gets, and who never, ever tires of talking about the most important topic of all: himself; then Eli may be your man. I’m also guessing he’ll have his shirt and pants off in a heartbeat if you show a little interest in his ink (but remember, you don’t get to touch, just admire hands-free).

Steel Muscle God “Dan”: SMG rocked my world when he agreed to chat with me about the life of an online bodyworship phenom with an innate understanding of wrestling kink.  While you are not allowed to lick his steel muscles from head to toe during this dinner date, I guarantee you that you’ll feel a stirring deep down in your pants the moment he opens his luscious lips and growls out his erotically charged baritone.  Seriously, this man oozes sexiness. He could make me cum by reading the phonebook, and I’ll be damned if I wouldn’t come back for more of the same as soon as I reloaded.  Although you can’t touch it, SMG is an unapologetic exhibitionist, so whatever attire you specified, plan on seeing him take it off before the meal is over.  Be prepared to laugh a lot, because he’s got an entrancing sense of humor, and he’s the only hot bodied hunk I know with both the balls to take our money to worship his naked body AND poke fun at himself.  Conversation is likely to revolve around friends, working out, and censorship on the net, but seriously… just shut the fuck up, watch his gorgeous lips move, and let that voice transport you to your fondest fantasies.
Skip Vance: although I haven’t enjoyed a full-length interview with him yet, Skip did considerately take  the time to give me some on-the-record feedback on my take on his real life lover and rumored-to-be tag team partner, former homoerotic wrestler of the month Christian Taylor.  An unapologetic jobber with a crazy lust for getting his hot bod bashed mercilessly, he’s off limits for you to dish out any of your own corporal punishment you’ve been inspired to fantasize about after watching Skip at work! But I can guarantee you that you’ll definitely hear him gush about his life of domestic bliss with Christian (including their private wrestling routines), his fierce lust for wrestling, and the catalog of crushing humiliation he’s suffered at the hands of… well, everyone!  Don’t be surprised to also get a strong dose of workers’ rights and musings on healthy cooking, because he’s one well-rounded babyface masochist!

Ben Monaco: in our interview in June, Ben gave neverland readers a glimpse into what it’s like for a new kid on the block to get “discovered” by the star-makers at BG East.  His hungry lips are completely off limits to you this night, mind you, but perhaps you’ll decide to serve popsicles for desert so you can watch him wrap those baby’s around something long and suck it hard.  He’s a new face in the homoerotic wrestling universe, but I can assure you that you’ll enjoy plenty of delightful insights into erotic wrestling from him.  Ask him about the gallons of sweat he drenches his opponents with… go ahead, I dare you, because after listening to him describe his body slipping and sliding across his opponent’s drenched muscles, you’ll be politely excusing yourself to take care of a pressing need that’s arisen in your crotch.  If you can convince him that you can keep a secret, he’ll tell you straight up who’s doing what on camera and off, and he’ll give you his unvarnished opinion on the ranks he’s still working to rise within.

Cage Thunder: my interview in July was just the tip of the iceberg about knowing the man beneath the mask.  You know you want him to knee you in the balls and crush your face into his crotch as you grovel in front of him, but none of that is allowed on this dinner date! So take a cold shower and pick out your finest mask to wear, because Cage Thunder is a class act who’ll demand the best.  Points of discussion to prepare for: wrestling, gear, New Orleans, erotica, boys he’s bashed, boys he’s still waiting to bash, the existential implications of all of the above… If you’re daring, though, you’ll just mention the name “Mitch Colby,” and then sit back and watch the sparks fly for hours on end!

Darius: also granting me an interview in July, bodybeautiful private wrestling hunk turned BG East muscle beast, Darius would be a charming dinner date, I’m certain.  There’s just something about him that makes me think of the word “gentlemanly.”  If it’s the custom in your house, I expect he wouldn’t think twice about taking his shoes off when entering.  Hell, tell him it’s the custom in your house and I bet the beautiful hunk of muscle would take all his clothes off to show you your proper respect, because he’s not shy for an instant about showing skin! Working out, the underground wrestling circuit, his plans to destroy SMG in body and soul… all these are likely topics you’ll cover over the course of the evening, but the only thing you’ll remember when the napkins are put down and the last of the wine gone is falling into those gorgeous eyes and watching his knee-buckling sexy lips move as he talks to you.  Go ahead and tell him it’s the custom in your house that dinner guests flex for their dessert. Darius is not a man to neglect the niceties! 

Cameron Mathews: just last month I interviewed your final option for a dinner date with a homoerotic wrestler.  I know you want Cam and Lon to show up together, preferably to reprise their indy wrestling days and wrestle one another in your living room, but it’s not going to happen this time! If it’s Cam who strikes your fancy, just remember you can look at that legendary bubble butt, but you can’t touch! He’s pretty much the epitome of a babyface, but don’t think for an instant that you’ll have some naive kid tucking his napkin in his shirt and asking you to pass the ketchup for his filet mignon.  This veteran of nearly every production company across homoerotic and straight-up independent wrestling known to man has seen it all, and if you’re ready to show him his proper respect, I bet he’ll keep the conversation lively with stories from the long road of making a living with a passionate love of wrestling, a hot body, and boyish good looks. If you’re looking for reflections on post-Marxist critical philosophers, Cam may not be your man, because he lives, breathes, eats and drinks nothing but wrestling, my friends.  But if it’s every aspect of wrestling from coast to coast, hardbody to doughboy, ring to mat, jobber to heel that will delight you, then you can’t go wrong with picking Cam.

Register your vote at the right. Only one vote per person (this is highly scientific!). Polls close in 2 days. Lobbying for your choice in the comments below is strongly encouraged.

Magnificent Black Muscle God

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What else would you do if a gorgeous homoerotic wrestling hunk sent you photographs of his ripped body and monster cock struggling to break free from the confines of his gear? Ask him for an interview, of course. That’s precisely what I did after Darius provided graphic evidence that we should all be pulling for him to come out on top of that schoolboy pin jack-off session in a head-to-head with Steel Muscle God.  Darius offers up some news, some predictions, and just a couple hints of behind the scenes questions that have burned a whole in the crotch of my pants for years.
——–

Darius: 5’10”, 198 lbs., 48″, 18″, 10″
Bard: Hey Darius! Thanks so much for taking the time to answer some questions for neverland readers. BG East fans know you from a couple of matches there, but I’ve seen several pics you’ve posted in wrestling forums and on Facebook that demonstrate that you have a lot more wrestling experience than just those two BG East matches. What’s your wrestling background? How often do you wrestle these days?


Darius Muscle Jobber Magnificent

Darius: I did some wrestling in high school but didn’t get into pro until a friend of mine, Henry, told me that I would make one hot jobber. So we went to Texas and did a couple of matches for Commando Sports Wrestling. First time in a ring for me. Took on one of their veteran heels and their champion. The DVD was called Darius Muscle Jobber Magnificent. Heard the video sold pretty good. From there I was hooked. Now I wrestle around once a week with some good friends.

Bard: Sounds like quite an initiation into pro wrestling! I’m looking up that DVD immediately! Your body is… wow, I don’t even know how to finish that sentence! Your muscles take my breath away, and in every image and video I’ve seen of you, your fitness is phenomenal! Have you had wrestling opponents who get distracted with the irrepressible urge to veer into muscle worship?

Darius: I don’t wear clothing that reveals much of my body. It’s when I strip off the clothing that my opponents’ eyes open up wide. Being a male escort on the side, I get a lot of requests for body worship, which I just love. Not to say that during and after my matches there isn’t some body worship. I guess it’s my posing that caught the eye of one modeling company, which I did a shoot for.

Darius is a Muscle Model, too!

Bard: What part of your physique do opponents or clients seem to fixate on most? Is it a turn on for you to bring a man to his knees just by flexing those pythons you call arms (and don’t even try to tell me that’s never happened!)?

Darius: I think it’s my abs that get the most attention from my opponents. Before the match starts, I can see their eyes focusing on my abs. They seem to love to try to break them down. They work me over good with punches, elbow drops, claws etc. And to tell you the truth, I just love having them worked over. When I do flex my pythons my opponent are mostly like already done on the mat after their defeat.

Bard: Speaking of pythons, thanks again for the pics you sent me recently in response to my fantasy about where things might go in a match between you and internet muscleman, Steel Muscle God. Wow! WOW! I just want to clarify that my fantasy of you on your back and SMG schoolboy pinning you and stroking himself to ecstasy while you palm his pecs was, in no way, meant to suggest that I’m assuming you’d lose the match. What do you think would be your biggest challenge in conquering SMG? How do you think a head-to-head against him would go?

Darius: Would be one awesome match to have with SMG. I think I would be his biggest threat to take him down for the count. No question, I would have to stay away from getting trapped in between his massive legs. Once you are trapped in them, there might not be any escape. On the other side, he would have to watch out for getting crushed by my arms in a bearhug. I have not had anyone get out of my bearhug once applied. I love to see the expression on my opponent’s face as my arms wrap around their body as it’s slowly lifted off the mat and the crushing begins. The expression of helplessness comes across their face quickly as they know they are done.

SMG’s bone crunching scissors vs.
Darius’ rib crushing bearhug!?

Bard: That would be a barnburner and a crowd pleaser, seeing whether it would be your bearhug or SMG’s scissors coming out on top! With the visual aids you sent, I can easily see the scenario I described in my recent post reversed and you turning out on top of that schoolboy pin! The idea of SMG being forced to show some respect and administer a little body worship of his own makes me a little dizzy with anticipation. I think you could very well be the muscleman to make SMG tear his eyes away from admiring himself when he gets a look at your huge pecs! Any more news about whether you’ll have a chance to test SMG’s steel muscles on the mat anytime soon?

Darius: You may think, but I know I will make SMG see for himself who is the true Muscle God. He will be on his knees looking up at this Black Muscle God as I pose before him. Right after this interview I will try to contact him about his visit and the match. Will let you know what he says.

Bard: Fantastic! I’m breathless in anticipation of the news! You both have awesome enthusiasm for wrestling and charisma to match your smoking hot bods! Okay, so I’m finding myself distracted as we speak, as I browse some of your pics! BG East reports that you’re 5’9″ tall and 184 lbs. Is that about right? Are their any other measurements you’d be willing to tell us to help us appreciate your fine, fine body?

Darius: Right now my stats is 5’10”, 198lbs. My chest is 48, arms 18, and 6 pack abs. And another muscle part at 10 inches… and thick. And one smooth ass.

One fine, fine, fine smooth ass!

Bard: My, oh my! Somehow getting a run down on your numbers has failed to do anything about my complete distraction! I hope a measuring tape is involved when you and SMG go at it! So far at BG East, you’ve only faced two opponents. First you went pec to pec with the subject of frequent posts here at neverland: Mr. Joshua Goodman. The website description for the match mentions that you’ve boasted about your capacity to take just as impressively as you can give, and you definitely deliver on that promise against Mr. J. The sight of you suffering in the ropes is just… so… damn… hot! What do you think it is that makes fans of homoerotic wrestling so turned on by seeing such a powerful physique like yours vulnerable and dominated?

Darius: When I first contacted BG about doing a match for them, Kid Leopard already knew in his head that I would make one hot jobber. In my mind, you don’t see many black muscle men that can make a hot jobber. The sight of my body getting worked over and pinned or submitted is a turn on for my opponents, and, you know, for me also. No question, in my match with Joshua he just loved working me over. The scene with me trapped in the ropes and him working me over was dam hot. And as you can see he didn’t hold back from smashing his fists and forearms into my abs and pecs. You could hear the sound of his fist slamming into my abs all over the room. My body was so red after the match. Got many emails from fans telling me how much they love seeing me lose my matches. They tell me I sell it so well, my facial expressions, the pain… they can’t get enough of it. That makes me feel good and willing to oblige my fans.

Darius suffers in the ropes as Mr. Joshua hammers down

Bard: Without a doubt, you are nothing short of breathtaking when all of those muscles of yours are tied up and suffering sweetly! And I love your attitude. Your commitment to your fans is probably what makes you sell so well! I think you’re the first wrestler I’ve interviewed who’s faced Mr. Joshua in the ring. You got an extremely up close and personal look at that legendary package of his. Are his balls as behemoth in person as they look on DVD? Please tell me you got a behind the scenes look at what Mr. J packs in those trunks!

Darius gets an up close look at Mr. J’s package

Darius: Not one tells what goes on behind the scenes, but just let’s say that what they say about him is true. But I can honestly say that mine are bigger.

Bard:  I’d like to be judge of that! Mr. Joshua has been teasing us for years with that pendulous package of his, shoving his hand down his trunks, shoving his balls in opponents’ faces, nearly spilling out of the confines of his gear. But we’ve never actually seen his pride and joy in the flesh, and the only opponent who has managed to conquer and strip him of his trunks refused to share what he discovered lurking under there. From what I’ve seen of the pics you shared with us here, cock watch fans would bust a gut to see in action that lead pipe you’re swinging! Is there any chance we’ll ever see you wrestle naked?

Darius: Well, first let me say I’m glad you like the pictures that I sent you. Been asked by a few companies to do some naked wrestling; Naked Kombat was one (which I heard is now out of business), BWN out of Atlanta, and of course BG. I have said no to all of them. I guess I’m just not ready to go that route just yet. Not saying it will not be possible in the near future. I did my first photo shoot for Paragonmen, and it was the first time I did nude shoots, which I am sending to you right now. So maybe nude wrestling might come along soon. For now you just have to use your imagination.

Bard: I pride myself on having an extremely capable wrestling imagination, so there’s no problem there. But I’m latching onto the words “just yet,” in your answer, and I’m officially lobbying hard to convince you to tackle a strip stakes match! The only other appearance that BG East has released so far of your work is your backyard brawl against that skinny boxer punk, Jayden Mayne. This match truly astonished me, first of all because the contrast between you and Jayden is just breathtaking. I’d swear you could snap the kid like a twig without breaking a sweat. But the second astonishing thing is that, although you fucking own Jayden for most of the scrap, he drops you with a couple of low blows and then, shockingly, chokes you out cold with those long, lithe legs of his. Fuck! What were you thinking when you woke up from that one?

Darius: Yeah, you would never think by looking at our pictures that the skinny punk would ever have a chance on taking down a muscle man like me. But that’s what makes wrestling so much fun. The fantasy of someone like Jayden taking someone down, someone like me, could only happen in pro wrestling. And that makes it so much fun for me and my fans. Of course you knew the only way he was going to do it was to cheat, and cheat he did. I believe it was his very first win for BGE. I have to give it to him, his legs are long and skinny, but they are powerful. He had me trapped in good, and I knew it was only a matter of time that this muscle man was going to go out cold. After slowly coming too, could only think that what I thought was going to be an easy win didn’t happen, and my losing streak continues for BGE.

“…fucking hot!”

Bard: I definitely find Jayden to be a hot little fucker who comes across as dangerous, which he demonstrates in taking you down! His figure-4 choke on you is extremely hot to watch, and hearing what it was like from your perspective is simply scorching! So, I hope you don’t mind me saying that as much as I’m infatuated with your gorgeous body from head to toe, your ass has played a starring role in several wrestling fantasies of mine! The moment that you had Mr. Joshua’s head locked-in high and tight between your legs, and then you rolled up to your knees and leaned back… damn, chisel that image in stone and install it in the Louvre, because that’s nothing but a world class work of art! Among the current roster of cocky egos and hard bodies at BG East, who do you think is most deserving of getting a humiliating, up close view of your muscled glutes like that?

Darius: Man, the sight of Joshua trapped between my legs, moaning as I put on the pressure trying to get a submission from him was fucking hot. I just wish I could have heard his submission. The BGE roster is full of hunks that I would love the chance to take down and pose over their defeated bodies. Bulldog Barzini, the cocky Cole Cassidy, The Enforcer (someone you just mentioned recently on your blog). Kid Karisma is one heck of a wrestler, and on the top of my list Tyrell Tomsen. You don’t see many matches pitting one Black Muscle God against another Black Muscle God. This would be one hell of a match. Shit, I would pay to get it done.

Tyrell Tomsen vs. Darius: Black Muscle God vs. Black Muscle God!

Bard: I’ll pre-order 3 copies today! I’ve seen your comments in chat forums calling out big Tyrell. Damn that would be a dream match up! Good god, all that gorgeous muscle locked in combat! As a fan and frequent reviewer of homoerotic wrestling, it seems to me that the industry has often neglected to feature men of color. Would you agree, and if so, why do you think that is?

Hoping we see more of Darius being a Magnificent Muscle Jobber!

Darius: They are neglected because there are not many around. Black guys like to wrestle, but I think it’s mostly in private and not in public. I think there is a big opportunity for black guys to show what they got and let many fans of black men see them. I have wrestled many black guys in private, but mention to them about taking pics or doing video and it’s a big “no.” I, myself, have no problem showing off my body and letting guys fantasies come alive. Maybe someday that will change.

Bard: Fascinating! I hope that both the audience calling for more black wrestling hunks and the roster of said wrestlers grows. I know that I speak for a whole lot of wrestling fans when I say that I’m absolutely aching to see more of you, and to see more of your wrestling, in the future. Are you slated for any more work with BG East? Is there anywhere else fans can go to enjoy you in wrestling action?

Darius: Right now I have nothing planned, but things do change quickly in this business. BGE has 3 more of my matches in their vault, hopefully they will release another one soon.

Bard: Is there anything else you’d like Darius fans to know?

Wrestle that!

Darius:  Not really… well maybe one. If you ever dreamed of taking on a muscle black stud like me in a wrestling match, I am available for a fee to do private matches. And that would include any type of fantasy match you have in mind, including nude wrestling. Lastly I would like to take time to thank all my fans out there. I truly appreciate all of you who take the time and effort to watch me wrestle, sending me emails, which I do like and do respond to. And if anyone has a request for me, they can send it to my email at DARIUSBLKMUSCLES@YAHOO.COM.

Bard: You are a gorgeous man, a thrilling wrestler, and quite a gentleman for your willingness to chat with me today. I wish you many, many, many more scorching hot wrestling matches to come, and I hope that you get all of the encouragement that you need to convince you to go on camera and wrestle naked! I’d love to see the look on your opponent’s face when he sees what he’s up against! Best of luck, and stay in touch with us at neverland. 

Darius: Bard, you know I do enjoy reading your blog and responding to them also. Keep up the good work.

Re-Writing My Fantasies

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Do you read the comments to this blog? You should. Sometimes the hottest, most interesting stuff happens there! For example, when I recently waxed poetic again about the allure of Steel Muscle God in wrestling action, Darius of BG East fame commented that he and SMG are trying to arrange a rendezvous to compare scissor holds!  Sweet!!!

Darius has plans for the Steel Muscle God

Compelled by this tidbit, I repeated the rumor in a subsequent post last Friday. I also described a personal fantasy that this inspired, in which SMG has Darius in a schoolboy pin, stroking his gorgeous cock hovering over Darius’ face while Darius grabs a couple of luscious handfuls of SMG’s beautiful pecs. Again, Darius responded, assuring me of the real possibility that he might very well be the hunk on top of that schoolboy pin rather than the other way around.  In that case, Darius promised he’d be the one stroking his “massive rod.” To drive home the point that his cock easily merits the starring role in my homoerotic wrestling fantasies, he sent me some pics (with permission to post) to hint at what things would look like with SMG flat on his back, palming Darius’ mountainous pecs, with Darius’ rod pumped hard and exploding in victorious ecstasy!

Darius might require an extra pair of hands to tame that python! Yes, I’m volunteering.

YOWZA! Does that require a concealed weapon permit, because Darius is packing major league heat!?

Is this the view SMG would see staring up at a victorious Darius?

If SMG finds himself conquered and staring up at that beast, even the godly one will have to admit that’s nothing short of divine! Someone has got to capture that moment on a digital recorder, package it up, empty my wallet, and send it to me pronto, regardless of which of these fantasymen ends up flat on his back. It’s a win-win-win as far as I’m concerned!

Reach up and feel the power of those pecs flexing in the palms of your hands!

I’m delighted, humbled, and titillated that Darius reads and comments on neverland. Adding fuel to the fire of my insatiable homoerotic wrestling imagination does nothing but skyrocket this fantastic muscle warrior up the line-up of wrestlers who I want to see showing up in my mailbox and who will most definitely be appearing in a wrestling fantasy in my mind soon and often!

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Crisis of Faith

wrestlebard5 Comments
Steel Muscle God breaks his opponent soon.
“Come on, guy. Let’s see if you can break me soon. Try to snap me!” The English is just a little dodgy, but Steel Muscle God’s opponent manages to communicate loud and clear. To start chapter 4 of his backbreaker series with SMG, the smart-assed skinny guy slaps down an indefensible challenge. This is Steel Muscle God, buddy! You’re a mere mortal. Of course he’s going to snap you… soon!  

SMG’s spine snapping torture rack makes his opponent’s toes curl
SMG looks incredible, of course.  The backbreaker series demonstrates some of the sexiest aspects of homoerotic wrestling. SMG’s gorgeous physique flexes powerfully, stretches beautifully, bulges perfectly. The body, the voice, the supremely confident, domineering, humiliating domination… I continue to maintain that SMG has an intimate and intuitive understanding of homoerotic wrestling kink.  This 4th chapter of back abuse on skinny loudmouth punk means that members on SMG’s site can see 75 minutes of delightful Steel Muscle God domination dished out all over this guy’s lucky body.  And as I’ve mentioned before, his skinny opponent has a surprising certain something about him as well. I’ve already noted that his taunting, kamikaze verbal challenges both make me laugh and turn me on in anticipation of what SMG will have to do to mete out divine retribution. Watching more of this “match” (aka, mauling), I also noticed that the skinny lamb-to-slaughter also has a delightful way of flexing and curling his toes just when SMG is pouring on the back torture the hardest. Wrapped around that divine neck, he hangs limp and helpless. But when SMG pulls hard on his leg and throat, bending him around his neck in a way that a human body just wasn’t meant to bend, the skinny punk’s toes start squirming, poignantly punctuating his helpless agony. The boy is hurting, and even his toes can’t hide it!
Just try to take your eyes off of those divine thighs!

SMG repeatedly points out to the outmatched punk in chapter 4 the magnificent muscles that made this match a mission impossible for the mere mortal from minute one. He points at the flexing, bulging head on his left quad, demanding that his audacious opponent look, marvel, contemplate the perfection in front of him.

You can look, but don’t touch without divine permission!

As if he can’t restrain himself (I’m with you there, buddy!), the mere mortal reaches out, slack jawed, to stroke the divine, flexing beef in front of him. Over and over, SMG slaps his hand away in disgust. You don’t just reach out and grab divine muscles like this. You have to be found worthy to worship that body. Speaking of, I think it’s about time somebody was found worthy!  If there was someone destined to star in a Wrestle Worship match, it’s Steel Muscle God. I can think of a few opponents that I’d like to see him face in a wrestling match with body worship stakes. I’m first in line. My second choice?

Darius is eager to feel the steel!

Darius commented on my last post about SMG, breaking the news that he’s been in contact with SMG and they’re trying to work out the details for the two of them to meet for a match when SMG visits the US this summer.  This strikes me as a potentially epic pairing of two of the sexiest wrestling musclebodies to be found! Just thinking about them trading rib crushing bear hugs and crotch-to-face head scissors makes me pop! If they sell tickets, I’d like to buy three, because I’m going to have to spread out, and this is going to get really, really messy.

Steel Muscle God swings a lead pipe

In my interview with SMG this spring, he declared his commitment and delight to please his fans. Whether it’s rounding up a friend and convincing him to get crushed, twisted, and humiliated on camera, or if it’s working his divine steel muscle rod into a raging sledge hammer, he’s not about to shrink from doing what it takes to satisfy his worshipful fans.

Time to see ALL of these steel muscles in wrestling action!

This fan, for one, is aching to see SMG go toe-to-toe and cock-to-cock with a homoerotic wrestling hunk like handsome muscleman Darius!  I’ve watched Darius in action, and I wouldn’t dare to presume who would wring out the first or the final grunting, humbling submission. But I can’t help myself but picture post-match extra curriculars that include SMG schoolboy pinning Darius’ mountainous deltoids, grabbing his steel muscle rod in both hands, and cranking out a beautiful shower of ecstasy while Darius strokes SMG’s luscious pecs and pinches his nipples. This is my hope and prayer. Now I will sit back and wait to see if there is a god.

Real Friends

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I’ve got deadlines coming out my ears, so things have been pretty quiet around here lately. That isn’t to suggest that I’m not thoroughly immersed in the world of homoerotic wrestling still. Somehow, there always seems to be time for that in my life, in one form or another.

BG East Boss, Kid Leopard, makes Sailor Rob his bitch
I was exchanging emails with a long-time online contact and writing collaborator a couple of days ago. We know each other primarily through the venue of homoerotic wrestling fiction.  I mentioned in my last email something about BG East. He replied that he’d never heard of them.
Kid Vicious meditates on the connection between pain and pleasure

Wha-ha-huh?! I studied his reply closer to figure out where I was misreading it. But no. Never heard of BG East. Was he joking? It doesn’t look like it. He apparently loves some hot, erotic, beautifully bodied wrestling but is unaware of BG East, which by their own account have been producing exactly that (hot, erotic, beautifully bodied wrestling) since 1980! I became aware of them about 14 or 15 years ago, and I’ve been pretty much obsessed ever since. So imagine my shock to learn that a fellow kinkster who totally gets off on the same sort of wrestling action that I do (as far as I can tell from comparing wrestling fiction notes), has absolutely no idea who BG East is.

Badboy Joe Mazetti folds hunky Brad Rochelle up like gift wrap
Simply amazing! This disclosure reveals a few things to me. For one, this online collaborator clearly does not frequently read this blog. It’s simply impossible that someone could even occasionally read neverland and come away having never heard of BG East (or any of the other companies I finance with my homoerotic wrestling purchases, but especially BG East). Most of the feedback and ongoing conversations I’m involved in start with something I’ve said on the blog, so it catches me off guard that someone who knows my wrestling kink rather well doesn’t linger much around these parts. No shame, mind you. I’m not suggesting there’s anything wrong with not reading my frequently convoluted, often self-contradictory musings about what turns me on about homoerotic wrestling. Just surprised that someone who’s read a lot of my writing doesn’t read it here much.
Jonny Firestorm is out to destroy prettyboy Alexi Adamov
More interestingly for me, this revelation surprises me because I figure everyone who’s into homoerotic wrestling fiction online is also part of the fan base of homoerotic wrestling videos. I wasn’t conscious of it, but I was assuming that the gay wrestling video tent entirely contained within it the gay wrestling fiction audience. Homoerotic wrestling videos came before wrestling writing for me, so I’ve been under the assumption that everyone who I interact with around homoerotic wrestling fiction has also come by the same path. Assumption checked.
Mr. Joshua shows Darius that he’s got the right tool for the job
That anyone with a love for homoerotic wrestling in any genre or format should just not recognize the name BG East, however, seems like a missed opportunity for some hot pounding wrestling delights. I’m fully transparent in admitting often that my own fiction is frequently drawn from the best and most inspiring of what turns me on in the videos I watch. I certainly seem to recognize many of the same angles, perspectives, body types and holds in gay wrestling graphics/visual art that are, at least, “in keeping” with some of the gorgeous wrestling that good folks like BG East produce so well.

Brooklyn Bodywrecker taunts us with Mr. Joshua’s naked ass

So anyone who happens to read this post, perhaps surfing through following a search link for wrestling fiction or some particular celebrity wrestling fetish that you and I share, if you’re gay and hot for wrestling and haven’t extensively explored the world of BG East, go there now. If the names Kid Leopard, Kid Vicious, Jonny Firestorm, Brad Rochelle, Alexi Adamov and Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!!!) don’t ring a bell, and if anything that rings my bell rings your bell, then you should avail yourself of some awesome wrestlers and action. And if you and I exchange emails and you report being completely unaware of BG East, or Can-Am, or Thunder’s Arena, or Rock Hard Wrestling, then don’t be surprised if, after I get over being gobsmacked, I immediately tell you to walk, not run, to any and all of these find purveyors of fine wrestling kink.

Jose and his jackhammer pound hunky Greg Leary into the mat

As far as I’m concerned, real friends don’t let friends remain unaware of hot, homoerotic wrestling action!

Playing God

wrestlebard3 Comments

I’ve been thinking about friends and family on the East Coast and hoping that everyone is surviving the aftermath of Hurricane Irene. AH emailed me this morning from his smart phone to let me know that he’s been without power for 24 hours and amusing himself with the mental game of assembling his ideal wrestler’s body from the component parts of many different wrestlers. In honor of AH and everyone mopping up from that messy bitch, Irene, I decided to quickly put together a post playing AH’s game of ordering up my ideal wrestler’s body a la carte.

Turns out, this is one tough game to play! I set out for myself the task of choosing no more than one body part from any one wrestler. Then I went to scouring my mental and literal library of homoerotic wrestling favorites to decide who to deconstruct in order to reconstruct into the assemblage of an over the top, made to order homoerotic wrestling god. I spun my wheels for quite a while getting a start on this project. There are so many wrestlers who I think of as possessing physical perfection, but many of them don’t necessarily possess the perfect singular body part divorced from the rest. But body part by body part, this is what I came up with:

For some reason, it worked for me to start from the bottom and work my way up my mad scientist construction of the ideal wrestling body. My Frankenstein’s monster of physical wrestling perfection has Troy Baker’s legs. Troy was in the running for nearly every body part, frankly, but it was Troy’s own love his legs that made me single them out for this recipe.  Thick and hard without a whisper of body fat, Troy’s legs were simply perfection, as far as I’m concerned. When he had Nick Archer’s noggin’ trapped between his crushing thighs, Troy looked like he was just about to cum with delight in the overpowering beauty of his dominating power. Though Troy did not literally cum in that moment, I’m certain that I’m not alone when I say that I certainly did, and have repeatedly, in worshipful lust for Troy’s unbelievable legs.

Hanging between my assembled wrestling’s god’s ripped thighs is Brian Maxon’s cock and balls. Between you and me, Brian Maxon’s wrestling usually left me a little uninspired. His cock, however, once unsheathed and getting worshipped by the loser he conquered on the mats, was pretty nearly my impression of phallic perfection. There are most certainly longer wrestling cocks, and a few thicker, but Brian’s cock was a perfectly proportioned monster that demanded to be be worshipped.

Spin my cut-n-paste wrestling god around and you’ll get a sight of the most gorgeous homoerotic wrestling glutes on the planet, which actually belong and fit so beautifully on the body of  Kid Karisma. Quite literally, I’ve put in a pitch for a wrestler spotlight DVD that stars Kid K’s ass, specifically. Somewhere (I can’t put my finger on the text at the moment… I think Joe wrote it), I saw Kid K described as a Tom of Finland drawing come to life. It’s the ass that makes that statement 110% true (see recent posts regarding my mathematical shortcomings).

Allowing our eyes to wander upward from Kid K’s perfect ass, we would find on my assembly of a made-to-order wrestling god the back of Brett Mycles. A thickly muscled back is a thing of wonder. I’ve seen some inspiring pec frottage, but I’m still looking for a scene of a wrestler working out an ecstatic explosion in the deep cravasse between the mountainous bulges of a muscled back like Brett’s. The aesthetics of a narrow, corded lower back beneath an astonishingly wide and contoured lat spread capped off by thick delt and trap muscles is just about the most beautiful thing in the world, I think.

Again, let’s spin my wrestling creation around now to take a look at the front, where he’s sporting Rafe Sanchez’ abdominal muscles. I’ve ranted a bit before (perhaps unfairly) about comments in a discussion group that referred disparagingly to Rafe’s body as “not the best.” I couldn’t disagree more, not in total, and most certainly not when it comes to the marble sculpture that are his abdominals and obliques. Add a cup of water and a squirt of detergent and I swear to you it would require not more than three passes to get your laundry clean on that washboard! The separation between each scale of that armor is superhuman. I’d want no one else’s ripped to shreds core on my wrestling god assemblage.

As our eyes wander upward from Rafe’s rocking abs, we’ll see the luscious pecs of Darius. Choosing whose pecs to add to my homoerotic wrestling god was perhaps the most difficult selection of all. If I hadn’t already cannibalized Troy Baker’s legs, his pecs very well could’ve beat out Darius’. As it is though, it’s Darius’ monster pecs that made the shortlist. Hot. Damn.

Shoulders were another tough call for me, but I decided that my homoerotic wrestling god of my own creation will have Wade Cutler’s delts. The mountainous, angular boulders that were Wade’s shoulders always completely captivated me, and they still do today as I treasure the moments where Wade shows up in my library of homoerotic wrestling. Massive, wide, veiny shoulders are intensely erotic, not to mention damn useful in a fierce wrestling contest. My wrestling god compilation sports the best shoulders I could think of.

Again, arms were difficult to select, owing to the deep field of worthy applicants. I’m giving a nod to rookie beauty, Thiago Diaz, however, because his arms are stunning.  With arms it’s certainly not all about size. Shape, proportion, balance and definition speak to me more when it comes to arms than blunt size. Thiago’s bulging biceps and massively thick forearms are entirely worthy additions to the wrestling god of my creation.

Finally, capping off the physical perfection of my wrestling god creation is the devastatingly handsome face of Brad Rochelle. Brad was in a barnburner of a race against exactly one other gorgeously handsome homoerotic wrestling hunk to lend his face to my creation. It was the cleft chin that just 5 seconds ago made me select Brad’s perfect visage.

Of course, this ideal homoerotic wrestling body I’ve just created requires some extensive smoothing and adjusting to match up size, complexion, and proportion. And I’m already thinking that, while this fits my “Muscle Worshipper” type that I scored highest on in yesterday’s quiz from Manof1000Holds, an equally perfect body would be made of entirely different parts to construct my idea of perfection when it comes to a pretty boy (okay, some of the same parts would certainly apply), or a bad boy.

Excellent exercise, AH! I hope you’re managing to keep yourself entertained as you wait for the power to come back on. So whose parts would comprise your ideal homoerotic wrestler?