Make Me Feel It!

Rolando delivers the whacks on Mike Paris in BG East’s Ringwars 7
I know somebody who needs a spanking today… and that somebody is me!
Bruce Hill and Trenton Comeaux bend over and take it
like men from Eduardo in Can-Am’s All American Oil Trio Muscle Bash
It’s my birthday! I love my birthdays. I have friends who dread them, but I’ve never had a birthday that I didn’t look forward to. You know what they say about the alternative. Another year older is another year not being dead yet, and I love life. So bring on spanking!
It must have been Peter Bishop’s birthday when he wrestled Dino Phillips
in BG East’s X-Fights 11
Normally, spanking isn’t exactly my thing. I mean, physical domination and humiliation works for me (like I need to tell a neverland reader that!), but spanking for the sake of spanking isn’t at the top of my list of what I need. But a birthday isn’t a typical day, and particularly after searching for some hot photos of homoerotic wrestlers leaving a handprint on some shiny, bare assess, I know what I’m wishing for as I blow out my birthday cake candles. 
Brad Rochelle leaves a mark on Billyboy’s vulnerable cheeks in BG East’s Demolition 2
I had decided to come up with a list (because I seem to be all about lists and awards lately) of the homoerotic wrestlers I’d most prefer to deliver my whacks. The image of Brad Rochelle’s fingerprints outlined in angry red across Billyboy’s lucky ass in BG East’s Demolition 2 quickly popped into my mind. I’d lie about it being my birthday once a month if it meant I’d be forced to assume the position across Brad’s thigh!
Cameron Mathews won’t soon forget to call him
Mr. Joshua after his Wrestler Spotlight encounter

My perpetual crush on BG East’s Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) makes me strongly identify with the lucky, lovely bubble butt of Cameron Mathews getting wedgied and swatted a hot red under the complete control of Mr. Joshua’s gorgeous body for Cameron’s Wrestler Spotlight.  I’d refuse to call him “Mr. Joshua” for at least 42 whacks (or so), just to soak in the sublime ecstasy of suffering a Joshua Goodman humiliation!

Love hurts in BG East’s Sexy Showdown 6

The image of ripped, studly twink Skip Vance landing a cracking open palm across his lover’s naked ass in BG East’s Sexy Showdown 6 works for me as well, with extra credit for the fact that the lanky lover getting spanked here is none other than reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month, Christian Taylor (aka Chris Cox).  The sweetest birthday present of all would probably be joining in on this intensely erotic homo wrestling fun, trading places with each of these gorgeous boys giving and taking my butt clenching smacks!

Skip gets it back from Mike Martin in BG East’s Wet & Wild 4 

Of course, Skip taking his whacks is also an inspiring sight, with handsome hottie Mike Martin sitting on his face and yanking down his trunks. Yep, this would be my choice of the preferred position for me to be forced to assume for my birthday spanking.

Kid Karisma leaves Z-Man’s glutes quivering in Summer Sizzlers 2
But all right, if I have to pick the one homoerotic wrestling hunk to make celebrating hurt so good… if I’m backed into a corner and required to pick just one out of the lineup of my favorite wrestlers to star in my own personal spanking birthday fantasy, truth be told, I’d pick my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma. The reasons are many, but first and foremost, Kid K clearly enjoys the task… a lot!  His evil laughter at yanking Z-Man’s trunks up his crack and making the playboy model spasm in shock at the hard swat sends chills down my spine while warming my crotch delightfully.

Headscissors-as-excuse for an ass slapping.
Kid Karisma absolutely tenderized the twinky ass of fierce little Len Harder for boatloads of Florida Fun. From just about every angle, Kid K beat on Len’s skinny ass relentlessly.
Fold-over face-pin underneath Kid K’s crotch? Just another opportunity to slap ass!
And as Kid Karisma himself made quite clear, he’s nothing if not the life of the party. So definitely, to celebrate my day I’m thinking of a certain red-headed, musclebound, freckle faced, bubble-butted beauty to pin me down, sit on my face, and pound out slow, nothing-held-back whacks across my bare ass, raising a perfectly harmonized chorus of my cries of pain and Kid K’s rumbles of sadistic laughter.

Then let’s turn down the lights, turn up the house music, and dance until I drop on my bright red, aching, happy ass in exhaustion! Life is good!

A Dish Best Served Cold

Tyrell’s handsome face smiles sinisterly as he drags
Z-Man by his perfectly coiffed hair to the ring.

I’ve just started to spend some quality time with Wrestle Revenge, the new release from BG East starring a truly astounding threesome of Z-Man, Tyrell Tomsen, and Dev Michaels.  It’s one story that extends across two match-ups. I love a through-story, so I’m thrilled at the overall narrative. Z-Man is up to his old tricks, trying to ice off his next opponent, Tyrell, by making him wait for Z to complete his pre-match grooming ritual in the bathroom. Whatever effect Z-Man expected his mind games to have, they do nothing other than send Tyrell into a fiercely dangerous rage. Z doesn’t get two inches through the bathroom door before he’s been punched, trampled, face-to-crotch head scissored to submission, and then dragged to the ring by his oh-so pretty head of hair.

Tyrell nearly picks Z-Man off his feet by nothing but his balls!

I count Tyrell among my guilty pleasures. “Guilty,” because he’s got more enthusiasm than he has actual skill in selling a homoerotic wrestling romp. It’s not his wrestling that I really find fault with. He hits his marks and looks nothing short of superheroic every step of the way. But his cocky banter sort of wanders, a little non-sensical and not quite always contributing to pushing the story forward. His dialogue often comes across a little forced to me. Like he knows he’s supposed to be snarling and verbally humiliating, but it’s a skill he hasn’t really mastered yet. However, he’s nothing short of a “pleasure” because when he’s in the shape he’s in for Wrestle Revenge, he’s just about the most beautiful thing on the planet! He repeatedly calls Z-Man “pretty boy,” which is completely on the mark. Z-Man’s mind-blowing fitness and silky smooth, rippled body makes my mouth and eyes water, he’s so over the top pretty. But for me (and I’m not trying to speak for anyone else), standing next to Tyrell, Z-Man fades into the background (I know, some Z fans are already furiously typing rebuttals). Tyrell reminds me of the bodies that I coveted as a teenager as I obsessed over every bulge and crevice of the bodybuilders in the magazines I secretly hoarded. His fluorescent yellow underwear/trunks accentuate his fantastic, hard, round ass and the outline of the head of his cock and huge balls dangle in his pouch hypnotically. His massive shoulders, his huge, veiny arms, his astonishingly separated pecs, his washboard abs, his smooth, powerful, lickable thighs… Good God this man is a stunning specimen of the very best of what turns me on and attracts me most in a hard bodied hunk. And his puppy dog eyes just make me melt.

Z-Man rises to the occasion to make muscle stud Tyrell suffer in a gorgeous
piece of homoerotic wrestling sculpture.

As Z-Man has proven every step of his journey through BG East, although ridiculously pretty and groomed within an inch of his life, he’s not a fucker to be underestimated! He makes big, gorgeous Tyrell pay with sweat and tears for turning his back on Z-Man. If anything can make me tear my eyes away from Tyrell’s magnetic ass, it’s the amazing pairing of both of these wrestler’s packages displayed so revealingly in their gear. Maybe we’ve seen the precise sketch of Z’s cock outlined so perfectly in these trunks before, but it’s a revelation to me. When his package isn’t getting clawed and bashed by Tyrell, it’s bouncing and swinging like a piñata (which explains Tyrell’s reaction to it). When Zack bridges high in an aesthetically perfect leg lock and double arm bar combo indicative of the best that BG East is bringing out of him, his perky cock looks like a flag pole planted at the summit of a truly stunningly muscled physique.

Tyrell shoves every inch of his beautiful body in
Z-Man’s humiliated face.

But there’s just nothing quite so climactic for me as seeing Z-Man at Tyrell’s mercy, his face stuck humiliatingly between his opponent’s luscious legs and the head of Tyrell’s cock pointing like an arrow at Z’s lips. Yes, yes, yes, yes… YES!

Dev defends Z-Man’s honor and decides he needs a bite
of that dish called revenge!

When I can gather myself to push play on the second match, I’m thrilled (THRILLED) to discover that Dev Michaels is seriously pissed off at the nasty bashing Tyrell dished out all over Z-Man’s playgirl body.  I’d heard the rumor that it was Z that brought Dev with him to BG East, and it certainly seems like big, bruiser, hairy chested Dev takes Z-Man’s pounding personally. The back story that beardaddy Dev feels compelled to take it upon himself to exact revenge for smooth, devastatingly prettypretty Z is a fantastically hot, erotic backstory! Fresh off his bagging and tagging poor Z-Man, however, Tyrell is unrepentant and feeling invincible.  He talks every inch as big a game as he did when he was smothering Z-Man’s face between his thighs. Big, nasty Dev, however, is not Z-Man.

Dev ties muscle stud Tyrell up in exquisite knots.

Here’s the “revenge” in this two act play. There’s almost no one I’d rather watch pick apart and exploit Tyrell’s perfectly muscled physique than Dev. Dev inspires big beardaddy fantasies I, quite honestly, didn’t even know I had. But no doubt about it: I have them, and they star Dev’s monster quads, unbelievably huge hairy pecs, and the buckets of sweat that Dev wrings out of his own body when he’s working really really hard (which as far as I can tell is ALWAYS)!

Tyrell tastes humiliation.

Dev manages to dish out the most humiliating punishment that comes straight out of Tyrell’s playbook in his victory over Dev’s boytoy buddy Z.  While personally I think having my face smashed into Dev’s sweaty crotch and my head squeezed until I scream would be a ride I’d pay double for, Tyrell doesn’t seem to enjoy the experience nearly as much.

Dev works every inch of Tyrell’s sculpted body.

As I’ve mentioned when commenting (often) on Joshua Goodman’s package (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), when you’ve got the heft that Tyrell has swinging between his thighs, you might want to be careful about taking a wrestling match to the level of cock abuse. For the repeated, nasty, often completely unnecessary fixation Tyrell had on punishing Z’s dangling baubles, beardaddy Dev uses those massive paws of his to dig in deep and claw the fuck out of Tyrell in a truly gorgeous work of art that technically would be called a single leg crab, but trust me, that does not begin to describe the exquisite sculpture that this is. Sweat streams off of Dev’s brow. The veins in his arms flair to the surface as he flexes. His hairy body is glistening as he sits mercilessly down across Tyrell’s impossibly narrow lower back. And the black adonis has nowhere to go but down!

Dev OWNS muscle stud Tyrell!

Again, I feel the need to say that this DVD does not contain the height of consistently and technically thrilling pro wrestling. It’s not bad, mind you, but when I’ve got a serious case of wrestle lust that only hot slamming, beautifully told pro/fantasy homoerotic wrestling can deliver, this may or may not satisfy that itch every time. But for three perfectly cast fantasy bodies telling a hot, homoerotic through-story and hitting some sweet marks and showing off each other’s world class bodies and sending my imagination exploding like fireworks as I marvel at the true wonders that are their beautifully, perfectly, uniquely sculpted fantasy physiques, I’ll but delighted to indulge in my guilty pleasures over and over again.

Kicking Ass and Taking Names

When I posted the reader’s choice poll last month for the rookie with the best potential in homoerotic wrestling, I was floored to get a note from my current pick as top contender for the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy division). BG East’s Kid Karisma named a couple of the candidates he’d like to get his hands on. I assured him that I’d like very much to see his hands on them, and then I quickly followed up with an interview request. After juggling holiday travels and work obligations, we finally got on the line together for a candid interview yesterday. As you’d expect from the likes of Kid Karisma, he doesn’t pull any punches. He names names and calls them like he sees them. His blunt honesty blew me away and sent me scurrying to my library of Kid K matches to “study” them some more with his insider perspective filling in the background. So turn down the lights, kick up the house music, and settle in for a hot conversation with BG East’s hardbodied party boy himself: Kid Karisma.

Bard: So thank you so much, Kid Karisma, for talking with me today. I’m a huge fan, so this is quite a thrill! To start us off, I just wanted to share an observation: having watched several of your BG East matches, it appears to me that you enjoy dominating an opponent almost as much as your fans enjoy watching you do it. Is that accurate?

Kid Karisma: That is correct! Well, it’s not that I like to dominate. It’s more that I like to show I am in charge, and how do I make sure they understand that? I make them feel humility. [laughing]


Kid Karisma: In Charge
Bard: That sounds like a fine distinction, but I think I understand. You enjoy making sure your opponents know their place… under you and at your mercy.
Kid Karisma: Exactly! And lets face it…most of them think they can hang, but I have way too much energy!
Bard: You’ve got amazing tenacity! Well, amazing everything, but your staying power is astonishing. I’ve noticed that, sooner or later, every opponent finds himself on his back in one of your schoolboy pins with your crotch shoved in his face. First of all, excellent work! Second, do you have any holds or maneuvers that you particularly enjoy inflicting on an opponent?
Kid Karisma: Well something that I started recently in the ring is tangling someone in the ropes to show off their body and have total access to punishing them. I did it against Z-man and Jenkins…talk about fun!  And on a mat I mainly like to crank the neck towards a mirror and have them admire my strength.

Kid K teaching Z-Man the ropes of BG East wrestling
Bard: Those are two excellent strategies that I certainly recognize from your body of work (that I’ve studied extensively). I know it’s a cliché question, but I’ve got to ask it: of the 10 matches BG East has released of yours, do you have a favorite?
Kid Karisma:  Christian Taylor is just fun to wrestle…love that body! Len Harder was feisty. But Jake Jenkins was a challenge and fun, so that one easily wins.  He is small, but his wrestling background and agility made it rather difficult. Plus, imagine getting a hold of that body! Well. I don’t have to! [laughing]
Kid K can feel Jake’s body melting
Bard:  Your match with Jake is a work of art! Damn, you two are an incredible pair in the ring together, and your complete destruction of him is epic. Any particular moment of that match stand out for you, in addition to tying him up in the ropes, as you mentioned before?
Kid Karisma:  I mean, I truly got to work him over completely! But when I had him in the Boston or bent over my knee…God, you can just feel his body melting and weakening…pretty epic.
Bard: Definitely! You mentioned your match with Z-Man and tying him up in the ropes as well. There was a moment where he you hung him over the top rope like the laundry, took a step back to look at him, and then commented, “Looks damn good from over here.” What do you find attractive in an opponent?
Kid Karisma: Well, there are different things I like within all my opponents, but the one thing that always gets me is a beat down opponent.  When you look at them and you know “I just made him my bitch,” that gives me goose bumps just talking about it! I just like to win, and I just happen to be a bad ass in the process.
Bard: Well, I’ve got goose bumps now, too. You are most definitely a bad ass, in the best sense of the term! BG East describes you as 5’8″ tall and 170 pounds, but somehow I find that hard to believe. You sure can fill up a camera with all those amazing muscles! Are those stats accurate?
Kid Karisma: Well, I fluctuate. In my matches against Z-man and Jenkins I was at about 180, possibly even closer to 185. I was pretty damn solid. I have thick legs so that always gives me a very stout look.            I played rugby for many years and started again recently so that’s where that build comes from.  When I played at the University, my legs were double the size.
Bard:  My goose bumps have goose bumps now! Solid is definitely one word that springs to mind when I picture you in the ring. You’ve got amazing legs, so trying to imagine them double the size is blowing my mind! As someone who clearly, and deservedly, loves his body, what would you say is your best body part right now?

 Kid Karisma: Well if I said anything but my ass, people wouldn’t take me seriously. It’s fucking huge! And all muscle, I would like to add! But, I say my arms! I have some serious peaks on my biceps, and have you seen my tri’s?
Kid K shows off his… triceps.
Bard: When I’ve been able to tear my eyes away from your muscled ass, yes I’ve appreciated your upper arms quite a lot. Wrapped around the throat of an opponent, they’re profoundly moving to see! What sort of workout routine do you have to sculpt your body so successfully?
Kid Karisma:  I must admit I have been working out for over 13 years now. So I have done it all. But my workout mantra is Form and Focus: Proper form while focusing on the muscle and high reps work wonders. Also, it’s 80% diet. That’s the hard part.  I was raised to be a jock I guess; maybe that’s where my attitude comes from. [laughing]
Bard:  Sounds like your physique is well earned! You know, of course, that you have an army of Kid Karisma fanatics that are completely in awe of the sight of you flexing those peaked biceps over a crushed opponent. What’s it like knowing that you’ve got fans swooning over every inch of you?
Kid Karisma:  Well it is very humbling, first and foremost, I must say! I am always flattered to hear compliments (even though most are deserved), and without the fans supporting me, well you know…you were just thereThe Boss wouldn’t schedule me to beat up some punks. But at the end of the day, my body helps, but it’s my attitude that my fans really love.  Look at how many worthless pretty boys wrestle for various companies. Nothing but bodies with nothing behind them, a pretty face to beat, if you ask me. The Boss honored me with kid and karisma, because he saw something. Let’s face it; I earned the right to be swooned over. Also, for every person that thinks I am hot, there is one that hates me. At the end of the day none of those punks would say it to my face though! [laughing]
           
Bard:  I think that’s really why I picture you as a foot taller and 30 pounds heavier… it’s that ferocious, huge, gigantic confidence you have! And I’m certain you are absolutely right that’s what fans are so crazy about. Well, that and your superhuman ass. So speaking of Kid Leopard, how did you first get involved with BG East? Did The Boss happen to see your gargantuan thighs sprinting down a rugby pitch?
Red Baron teaches Kid K what friends are for
Kid Karisma:  No, nothing like that. My best friend, who’s been a fan of BGE for a very long time, got the chance to audition with them a few years back. He dragged me along for moral support. The next thing I knew, I was suited up and facing off in a three-way with my friend, aka “Red Baron,” and Cage Thunder. Before I walked out the door, the BG East boys were asking for more Kid Karisma.
Bard: We all owe a debt of gratitude to Red Baron! So, personally I try to avoid bad mouthing any of you gutsy wrestlers who work so hard to bring us such pleasure, but I love to hear the dish. Any inside scoop you’d like to share about any of your competition? Any wrestlers out there that you’d like to tell us fans what you really think of them?
Kid Karisma: [Laughing] Well, there is one guy, but the match hasn’t been released. It was easily the most intense match I have ever done. He hated my guts, and he hated the fact that I was much stronger and boisterous. Here’s the deal, if you ever had a chance to meet me, you’d know that all I want is to party. So all the haters I wrestle end up partying with me, and they end up loving me! Except one! [Laughing]
           
Bard: Oh my God. As soon as that match is released, I’m hitting you up for a follow-up interview to hear more about that! You’re most recent match was against Hoyt Riley who ended up putting a tick in the Kid K loss column. How the hell did that happen?
Hoyt Riley drops some hurt on Kid K
Kid Karisma: Listen… first off, fat ass sat on me!
Bard: [laughing]
Kid Karisma: …And I was still hungover as fuck! So go him.
Bard: Sounds like that one may still sting a little. What about some of the other wrestlers you’ve faced?
Kid Karisma: Jake is like a little fucking monkey.  I have never seen someone jump around as much as him.  Too bad that didn’t help him! In the end, he is just a kid…a nice kid…and I am Kid Karisma… or also known as a bad ass!   And as much as I will get shit for this from both The Boss and the fans…who in the fucking world taught Garza to wrestle? I thought they did a better job in Mexico! I mean, I have a luchadore mask out of respect… but give me a fucking break. But he is fucking hot! You should see his ass up close…mouth watering.
Bard: Indeed, my mouth is watering as we speak!

Kid K has some ideas about what to do to Christian Taylor’s body
Kid Karisma:  And I wish I could have Christian on a mat only. The things I would do to his body. Well, yeah, your blog is x-rated, right!? [laughing]
Bard: Do NOT hold anything back on my account! This is fantastic stuff!
Kid K is confident Rocco remembers this fondly
Kid Karisma: Oh, and remember Gear Wars against Rocco?
Bard: Extremely fondly, yes I remember it.
Kid Karisma: God! He fucking thought he was God’s gift to the world. I showed him who mac daddy at the end of the day is!
Bard: That you did! He looked seriously put out to get owned so completely by you. I’d be hard pressed to believe he walked away letting bygones be bygones after he squirmed so bitterly with your ass planted on his face.
Kid Karisma: Listen…if you remember, he tried to get out of shit quick, and I let him sometimes. But he loved every second and every drop of sweat of mine on him.  I’m pretty sure he still plays with his hole thinking about my ass, socks and whatnot in his face!
Bard: [Laughing] That’s hilarious!… and seriously turning me on. We’d better change the subject before I completely lose my focus. So are there any wrestlers you haven’t faced yet who you’d like to introduce to the ropes?
Kid Karisma: It’s not like I have a thing for taller, or shorter for the matter, but tight lean bodies.
Bard: You’re ready to work over anyone with a tight, lean body?
Kid Karisma: Yeah, and some other fat ass to redeem myself! There are a couple of pretty boys out there that I would like to get my hands on.  Can I just say, “Bend over… I mean GIVE!”
Bard: I pity any opponent who isn’t in top condition when they face off with you. Strike that. I envy any opponent that faces off with you. You’re an artist! Any pretty boys you’d like to name, or should we just leave it at that?
Kid K says Kirby Stone “looks like he’d
love to get beaten by me.”
Kid Karisma: Well, there are a few out there.  You know that innocent kid, Stone or whatever…he looks like he would love to get beaten by me.  He could be fun.  Or some novice hot kid that needs a good beating into the game [laughing]. I may actually pop one for that…especially when they can’t figure out what just hit them.
BardKirby Stone? Hot damn, that would be incredible! And if you “pop one,” I’m buying two copies (if we’re talking about the same thing). You’ve been incredibly generous with your time and remarkably candid! I feel like you’ve given us some amazing insight into what makes you such a hot commodity in the ring and on the mat. Before I let you go, is there anything else that you’d like fans to know about you when you aren’t conquering one pretty boy after another for BG East?
Kid Karisma: You are very welcome, and it was definitely fun chatting with you, even though I got a bit wordy here and there. You know us shit talkers can’t help it! [laughing]  I want to thank everyone for their continued support while I am developing as a wrestler, and there are many more hot matches planned that continue showing me at what I do best: kicking ass and taking names! Also, remember that without all of the supporters out there, I won’t get to demolish hot ass boys…and what a shame that would be. I also would like to thank you for taking the time to talk to me, and it definitely has been a pleasure. Plus it’s awesome to have someone so attentive listen to me rant! [laughing]
Bard: The pleasure, I assure you, is entirely mine! On behalf of a whole lot of us, we can’t wait to watch you put more pretty boys in their place, and by that I mean sandwiched between your monster thighs, crushed beneath your epic ass, or choked by your python arms! We’ll keep buying them and loving them as long as you keep knocking them down!
           
Kid Karisma: Sweet. Have a good day!
Bard: You too!

Kid Karisma, ready to party

Swag

A while back I solicited advice about a quandary. I have only so many resources compared to the wealth of homoerotic wrestling products one can choose from. In fact, in fine tuning my budget in these relatively lean times, I decided that I needed to drop one of my subscriptions. I invited readers to let me know where they think the smart money goes when it comes to subscription homoerotic wrestling.  A lot of you had strong feelings. Never let it be said that gay wrestling fans aren’t loyal! In the end, I decided that based on my tastes, priorities and financial analysis, I would continue to subscribe to the membership sites for BG East, Can-Am, and Naked Kombat, but dropped my subscription to Thunder’s Arena.
Auditions 2011 – Part 6 – Z-Man in trouble against rookie recruit Crush

Of course, I immediately began second-guessing. Naked Kombat has not been sparking my imagination like it used to. Should I have put my non-membership homoerotic wrestling purchases into the financial formula as well, potentially sacrificing DVD and download purchases (such as those I occasionally buy from Rock Hard Wrestling) instead of a subscription? And what could fill the void left by no longer having regular access to marvel at Big Sexy’s ass!?
Big Sexy’s gorgeous ass in jeopardy for butting into The Boss’s Audition 2011
Astute readers noticed that my recent ode to reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month, Z-Man, included some late-breaking photos from Thunder’s Arena. It turns out that Thunder’s Arena missed me, though I’m sure not as much as I missed them (and Big Sexy’s ass).  The brains behind the brawn at Thunder’s, Mr. Mike (though I picture him with big hairy pecs and a hot muscle bear belly), contacted me recently with the offer to enjoy Thunder TV, the Thunder’s Arena membership site again, complimentary for 6 months.
Angel welcomes talk, dark and very handsome rookie, James to the Thunder’s mat
There are two strings attached to my complimentary Thunder’s TV access. 1) I give my honest reviews of Thunder’s Arena wrestling releases in an effort to inform neverland readers about matches they might want to check out for themselves. I’ve never agreed, at any point, to anyone, to give a positive review to any wrestling matches that I don’t genuinely enjoy. I continue to think of this blog as just one man’s musings about what turns him on. So I’ll never say that something turns me on when it doesn’t. Regardless of the  price of a product, regardless of the pressures of rabid readers incensed that I don’t give enough respect to their favorite wrestlers, I strive always to just call it like I see it.
Sledge appears sick of all this attention paid to Z-Man lately in the upcoming release,
No Holds Barred 15 (photo previews available at Thunder’s TV)
String 2) attached to my complimentary Thunder TV membership is that I will clarify that of all the incarnations of Zack Vazquez, Zack Johnathan, Zack Holt… it was Thunder’s Arena that was the first to dub him “Z-man.” Despite Z-Man bringing the same nickname with him to BG East, the wrestling career indexed under “Z-Man” started with Thunder’s Arena. Fair enough.
Sexy, sweaty Sledge examines the target of his fury
My complimentary Thunder TV membership isn’t the only free wrestling entertainment that I’ve been handed.  After around 735 posts over the past two and a half years, and with a recent average of over 2,500 page hits a day, my fanatical adoration for homoerotic wrestling has come to the attention of several companies.  I’ve occasionally been surprised to receive unexpected, unsolicited downloads or DVDs with an invitation to enjoy them and write a review. I’ve even been offered the opportunity to name some of the products on my wish list, in order to continue to spread the news about the wrestling that inspires and feeds my lusts. The saying, “kid in a candy store” comes to mind!
Z-Man offers rookie recruit Lex a free shot in No Holds Barred 14
In case anyone is concerned that my integrity may be compromised by accepting free stuff from invested parties, I have a couple of responses. First, I’ve never accepted money for anything I’ve done on my blog. My enrichment from wrestling companies has always been in-kind. If I didn’t like what they were producing, it wouldn’t be much of an incentive to get access to more wrestling that I didn’t enjoy. Second, and likely most importantly, I do not claim or strive for anything like journalistic objectivity. Frankly, I don’t actually believe in the concept of objectivity, philosophically speaking. But practically speaking, neverland has always been about my biases, my particular tastes, my personal, subjective kinks and quirks. It’s ALWAYS about what I’m partial to. This accounts for everything that I bother writing about on the pages of this blog. It also accounts for my apathy in response to criticisms that have come my way complaining that I’ve shortchanged someone else’s favorite wrestlers and matches.  I experience no anxiety or concern about the fact that my favorites (i.e., my biases) don’t always coincide with everyone who reads neverland. For a more complete reiteration of this theme, consult the “Diverse Tastes” guest contributor series from this past summer.
My newest infatuation – Lex (love those thighs!)
So thanks, Mr. Mike, for the generous offer! I’m already newly in love with Thunder’s rookie Lex, with that hot bod, handsome, freckled face, mouthFUL of teeth, Texas accent and fantastic bronze tan lines framing that rocking, lily white ass! Even better, despite some obvious nervousness in his first on-camera appearance getting initiated by aforementioned Z-Man, Lex’s wrestling is highly entertaining. He suffers like a champ, and he demonstrates delightful skill in telling the story of the cocky, new generation badass. “It’s time for you to learn some new moves, punk!” he snarls with a sadistic grin as he hip-tosses Z-Man like a sack of potatoes. Those legs!!  A flying body scissors from a hot, young Texan!?  I’m seeing double vision with Lex superimposed directly on top of the image of Kevin Von Erich hanging off the side of a standing opponent, crushing the life out of him with those iron clad thighs. He wrestles better than your average rookie, but Lex inevitably gets schooled and conquered by the crafty, hot-bodied veteran willing to introduce Lex to an “old” move of a double ball claw.
Z-Man teaches rookie Lex that success in Thunder’s Arena
will take more than good looks, a hot body, and “new moves”
Nice!

A Rose, By Any Other Name

My reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month is none other than the irrepressible Z-Man… aka, Zack Johnathan, aka Zachary Vazquez, aka Zack Holt. There are more incarnations of Z-Man than I can keep up with, but it is entertaining to keep trying!

Z-Man faces “Ace” – Thunder’s Arena’s Easter Bash 2008

I’ve mentioned before that my first introduction to Z-Man was on Thunder’s Arena. The “playboy model does underground wrestling” concept was quite the hook. Thunder’s website shows the cover for Mat Rats 9, but a click through says the product no longer exists, which is sad because I’m hopelessly nostalgic about my homoerotic wrestling. What I remember about Z-Man’s first match against Alexander (the Great) is that I had to watch it a couple of times before I could get past Z-Man’s smirking and clowning around in order to really appreciate the homoerotic wrestling fare. Happily, I got there, not the least of which thanks to Z-Man’s luscious, sculpted body getting pummeled and humiliated.

Z-Man v Alexander “the Great” (the rematch) –
Thunder’s Arena’s Halloween Havoc 2009

Z-Man has long been arguably the linchpin of Thunder’s Arena.  At last count, he has starred in an astonishing 52 Thunder’s Arena wrestling matches!  His wrestling resume with Thunder’s alone is far too long to examine in much detail (and still manage to do the work that pays my bills to buy more homoerotic wrestling products!), but suffice it to say that Z-Man has wrestled, quite literally, a ton of wrestlers (cumulatively measured).  He’s pounded the mats with many of the wrestlers who inhabit my go-to list of sure-fire homoerotic wrestling satisfaction, including Frank the Tank, Ace Hanson, Ice-Man, Mr. (Christopher) Bruce, Cody Nelson, and two beautiful throw-downs with the most aptly named Big Sexy.

Z-Man v Big Sexy – Thunder’s Arena’s Revenge Match

Holy shit! What a line-up! Z-Man has had that handsome face of his crushed, crunched, battered and beaten by a venerable pantheon of some of the most arousing wrestlers at Thunder’s! And he’s still showing up for more!!! He’s been putting a new round of Thunder’s hopefuls through their paces for their most recent “Auditions” series, including beating the lovely (LOVELY) ass of freckled, tattooed, scruffy, mohawked, big-toothed Texas-leaguer rookie, Lex.  It’s just impossible to see Z-Man any longer as the naive narcissist whose body and spirit must be broken in proportion to his cocky swagger and self-worship. Z-Man’s a veteran now, and I like the sub-text that underneath his big mouth and perpetual adoration of his own body is a genuinely dangerous character whose turn it is to bring to heel a new generation of sexy young meat.

Z-Man auditions Lex – No Holds Barred 14

So Z-Man’s Thunder’s Arena filmography is, all by itself, of epic proportions. He’s a fixture in homoerotic wrestling, even if we were to just stop there. But of course Z-Man hasn’t stopped there, so neither should his fans. The first cross-over I caught Z-Man in was his appearance at the inauguration of Rock Hard Wrestling as Zack Johnathan. The plot was built around the idea that Z-Man saw himself as the definition, the epitome of Rock Hard Wrestling. He was the franchise, and the rest of the first generation RHW wrestlers should kiss his perfect, round ass for the opportunity to be propelled to fame on Z-Man’s coat tails (really, someone should plant their lips on this perfect glutes!).

Zack Johnathan v Brody Hancock – Rock Hard Wrestling

Again, at RHW Z-Man has faced some of the top-tier, go-to wrestlers that I can turn to just about any day of the month to grab hold of my wrestling kink so pleasingly. RHW’s translation of Z-Man into the ring was pure genius, for my tastes. My preference for ring wrestling has long been documented, and Z-Man bouncing off the ropes, getting his face pounded into the turnbuckles, and getting beaten into the canvas turns… me… ON! For RHW, Z-Man’s appeared as a ring-wrestling fantasyman against the fantastic likes of Ray Martinez (aka, Rio Garza), Troy Nelson, and 3 separate encounters with the magic biceps of Brody Hancock (aka, Reese Wells). 11 more wrestling matches (and counting?) show up on Z-Man’s resume from RHW.

Zack Johnathan & Cody Nelson v Brody Hancock & Troy Nelson –
Rock Hard Wrestling

The concept of Z-Man teaming up with Cody Nelson (who he would later wrestle against for Thunder’s Arena), against Cody’s brother Troy Nelson teamed with Brody is nothing short of brilliant homoerotic wrestling drama! The plot of a big brother egging on his playboy model partner to crush and humiliate his “little” brother’s sweat-soaked muscle physique is pure, unadulterated gold.

Zack Holt bares all for Mark Wolff’s Nubreed 8: San Diego

Had enough of Z-Man? Overexposed? Lagging fan enthusiasm? Not a chance when it comes to Z-Man. Just to give his bread-and-butter fan base a taste more, he can be purchased in full monty glory over at Can-Am, appearing in Mark Wolff’s softcore series, Nubreed. While we’ve come to associate Z-Man with Florida, Nubreed pictures him in San Diego, posing provocatively, stripping his clothes, and stroking his pretty cock (with an atypical outward bend when erect!). I’ve since found more softcore shots of Z-Man from nearly every angle elsewhere from other publications (which don’t seem to have any association with wrestling, so despite his naked beauty, my interest wanes there).

But there’s STILL more! Just this year, Z-Man migrated to the homoerotic wrestling producer that consistently turns my kinked crank hardest, BG East.  I was highly skeptical of this move. When I first heard rumor of it, I seriously doubted whether Z-Man could lift his wrestling game to the level that I come to expect of BG East products. Sure, I knew he’d look smokin’ hot. I figured he could take some pounding. I hoped he could dial down the clownery long enough to let me get seriously hot and bothered.

Z-Man v Patrick Donovan – BG East’s Sunshine Shooters 4 

Happily, Z-Man met BG East more than halfway. He lifted his storytelling to new heights in his mat tussle with homoerotic wrestling veteran Patrick Donovan.  Z-Man pleasingly surprised me by taking some fantastic pounding into those punching bag pecs that leave the pretty boy bright red and stroking his muscles in agony. He also made me swallow my bitchy, armchair criticisms by delivering hot, beautiful, arousing wrestling.

Z-Man (where his face belongs) v Kid Karisma – BG East’s Fantasymen 33: Muscle Pros

BG East then tossed Z-Man into the ring with my current top contender for the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division: Kid Karisma. As I mentioned above, Z-Man (or almost anyone, for that matter) in the ring makes my blood pump twice as hard as any other geography. This match made my head swim for so many reasons, including Z-Man taking to the air, getting pounded in the turnbuckle, trapped in the ropes, and tossed from corner to corner. Kid K’s delight in slapping Z-Man’s wedgied, gorgeous ass, sitting his world-class bubble butt on Z-Man’s gorgeous face, AND rubbing his crotch in Z-Man’s nose all made me more passionate for Z-Man than ever before, and propelled Kid K into the top 2 of my reigning favorites ranks.

Z-Man v Skrapper – BG East’s Mat Scraps 1

But it was Z-Man’s latest mat match against sexy…as…HELL Skrapper that earned Z-Man the title of my homoerotic wrestler of the month AND earned Skrapper elevation to top contender for the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestling pornboy. And now, I see Z-Man running new recruits through the ringer at Thunder’s Arena again. Wow. That’s a long, storied, and incredible career, any way you measure it.

This exhausting review of Z-Man’s career highlights for me two key points about the long-coming homoerotic wrestler of the month. 1) Have you noticed that Z-Man’s fitness doesn’t seem to waver an inch? Clearly, this man has no soul left to call his own, because he simply must have sold it to the devil to have a perennially ripped to shreds muscle body like that. I suspect that he may never appear in a “bodies over time” installment here at neverland because his body seems to remain unchanged in every tasty detail! In addition to the bill of sale that must exist between Z-Man and Satan, this also likely testifies to the fact that Z-Man is a ferocious self-trainer, a gifted body sculptor, and in possession of iron-clad willpower and focus.

Z-Man v Rocky Brick – Thunder’s Arena’s Bodybuilder Battle 16

And 2) I’ve never noticed before the midas touch that Z-Man has in relation to my own homoerotic wrestling attentions. While I’ve been long critical of what Z-Man brings to the table (before more recently, at least), it appears that Z-Man either has such an extensive wrestling resume that he was bound to wrestle opponents that have long driven me crazy with lust OR (and I freely admit, more likely) while Z-Man hasn’t always left me sold on him as a homoerotic wrestler, he has nevertheless been selling me all along on his opponents. That’s a skill set that I admit that I have a bit of a blind spot for.  I’ve clearly long enjoyed and been turned on by watching hard, hot hunks punish Z-Man for (in my mind) his wrestling shortcomings. Both Kid K and Skrapper were propelled into the top ranks of my overall favorites on the strength of their wrestling against Z-Man.

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month – Z-Man

So maybe there wasn’t really a method to his madness, but it’s impossible to miss the fact that Z-Man has been a fixture in my homoerotic musings and fantasies for long time. Whether it’s despite himself, or because he’s a profoundly skilled craftsman in the erotic arts of turning gay wrestling kinksters on by deserving to be punished for weak salesmanship, thus pushing opponent after opponent onward in my estimation as objects of homoerotic wrestling lust – Z-Man has earned my respect. I’m always at the mercy of a gorgeous hunk who can tell a wrestling story with his beautiful body, and Z-Man is doing that with flash and skill that rises above the crowd of boys lobbying for our affections lately. I look forward to Z-Man continuing to add to his epic resume, hopefully with new twists and turns in the plot, but always with the face of an adonis and the unbelievably constant body of a god.

Movement in the Ranks

The mental exercise of crowning “favorites” among the homoerotic wrestlers that I enjoy watching fascinates me. I get attached to my overall favorites. I don’t want to let them go, to let someone unseat them once I’ve said out loud, “This guy rocks me harder than just about anybody else.” So regular readers will back me up when I say that it doesn’t happen often that one of my favorites is replaced. Today is just such a momentum occasion, however. Mitch Colby has held the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestling pornboy or at least top contender for that title almost without pause since I started keeping track of such things. I find Mitch’s body profoundly moving, and there’s an authenticity to his wrestling that, without fail, has the effect of making it nearly impossible for me to tear my eyes away from him as he grunts, strains, flexes and crushes his way through one opponent after another. I’m deeply aroused by the sight of Mitch’s focused concentration as he picks apart some lucky loser, and I’m arguably even a little more aroused to watch Mitch throw everything he’s got at some superhuman freak only to be conquered and dominated in the end. Any new release with Mitch is instantly at the top of my to-buy list.
Mitch got those beautiful abs of his tested hard in Florida Fights 3
However, all that said, his latest new release came out in a batch of fantastic BG East wrestling that figuratively positioned Mitch side-by-side with a certain ferocious, rumbling bundle of nerves, nerve and sexuality that I’ve had my eye on for quite some time. I simply couldn’t ignore the juxtaposition of Mitch’s Florida Fights 3 bout and my growing crush on a certain grappler from Mat Scraps 1. While it’s certainly not that I don’t love Mitch’s high impact ring battle with Vlad Varek, I cannot help but note that Skrapper’s mat scrap against epic coverboy Z-Man has catapulted the skrappy one over top of favorite emeritus Mitch. It’s been a rare day in neverland that Mitch has been out of the the top two, but today I’m lustfully and enthusiastically elevating Skrapper to the position of number 1 contender for the title as my favorite homoerotic wrestling pornboy – right behind a dangerously quiet Trent Diesel.
The new #1 contender to the title of my
Favorite Homoerotic Wrestling Pornboy
I’m just going to put it right out there. I do not believe that Skrapper is pretty. I do, however, think he’s sexyasHELL.  Typically I wax poetic about the size and heft of my favorite wrestler’s bulges, but Skrapper is a different story. Not to say that he doesn’t have a gorgeous ass and more-than-a-mouthful of a package, but the first words that pop into my mind in contemplating Skrapper’s physique are lean, lanky, and wiry.  He’s got beautifully conditioned muscles in all the right places, but he’s no pretty coverboy with low slung pecs or massive biceps. At 5’10” and 145 pounds, he’s an astonishingly tight package without an ounce of bodyfat or merely gym toned muscle. He’s got an unconventionally handsome face with awesomely kissable lips and an aristocratic nose. I’d pick him out of any crowd as someone I’d desperately want to notice me. And if he did, and if he opened his mouth to speak, I’d be a goner.
“You’re losing so fast, dude!”

That voice! To be completely transparent, the word “Dude” is not a turn-on for me. And yet when Skrapper uses the word, as he does with relentless regularity, the timbre of his voice somehow skips right past my cerebellum and speaks directly to my cock. Perfect case in point: just about 2 minutes into his fearless face off with babyface extraordinary and homoerotic wrestler of the month, Z-Man. As is often the case, Skrapper starts wrestling about 2 speeds higher in intensity than his opponent. Z-Man looks for a moment like he’s going to have absolutely zero to offer against the raging focus of the skrappy one. “Damn!” Skrapper snarls, “you’re losing so fast, dude!” Holy shit, that irreverent, cocky, nothing to lose so I’ll fuck you over 9 ways to Sunday, skater badboy bass voice of his makes me nearly lose a load before Z-Man manages to get his groove going.

Beat that shit-eating grin off of face, Skrapper!!!

But it’s later in the match that Skrapper seals the deal to knock the knees out from under Mitch and demand my affections. Z-Man has a history (at least as far as I’m telling it) of hamming and mugging for the camera. BG East has been beating the living shit out of him since he arrived within their sphere of influence, such that he doesn’t have much time between grimaces to manage a cheesy smile. He does, however, still puke one out every so often, and they remain a serious buzz kill for me. So when Skrapper nearly rips the coverboy in half, he heaps on what is undeniably more punishment than is really necessary to make the muscleboy submit. When Z-Man hops up to his feet after conceding the fall, he looks like he’s ready to punch his fist through the back of Skrapper’s skull. “What!?” Skrapper demands. “That’s what you get for smiling at me, dude!” There. Right at that moment. Skrapper climbed into the top contender spot right there, punishing Z-Man not just for being pretty and cocky and screamin’ for it, but because Skrapper knows that fucking grin on the coverboy is a buzz kill and he deserves to be punished mercilessly anytime he pulls it out. I’ve been jonesin’ for someone to not only punish him for the shit-eating grin, but to call Z-Man out for it!

Driving home the point that you might want to just leave a
sleeping Skrapper lie.
Skrapper does not always win his matches. This is not a problem, and indeed it can heighten a wrestler’s allure as far as I’m concerned, if he makes the most of even a loss. Take, for example, Skrapper’s eventual loss at the hands of AJ Lyle in Undagear 17. Seriously, justice is on Skrapper’s side. He was just sleeping in the BG East matroom when AJ comes in, wakes him up, and tries to bully him out of his way. Fast-forward to the end of this scrap and you’ll be treated to Skrapper stripped naked and battered into complete and helpless exhaustion as the sweaty victor climbs on to use the skrappy one like his own electric blanket. Now rewind back to the beginning again, and watch how fucking irrepressible Skrapper is every single second of this match. True enough, he takes the loss and humiliation in the end. I sort of suspect he may have just had a hankering for a taste for giving up a cock-to-cock submission. But any way you slice it, pause the DVD at pretty much any point in the relentless battle, and you’re likely to see Skrapper firmly in charge or battling his way back from getting tossed around by his bigger opponent. Win or lose, you get the impression that Skrapper never really relinquishes the reins of psychological control in a match.

Kid Vicious & Skrapper’s understandable mutual admiration in Sexy Showdown 5: Florida Fun

It’s no wonder that in his relatively brief career in homoerotic wrestling, BG East has put him in the faces of some of the biggest and baddest boys on record. His encounter with notorious heel Kid Vicious left me breathless for all the right reasons, first and foremost the amazement to watch KV have to work to keep up with the eroticism (which he does, of course)! This is the most intensely erotic match I’ve seen Skrapper in, and frankly I’m not sure if there are many other than the likes of KV who can really match the inherent sensuality and eroticism that Skrapper brings with just a look and a snarl. There are moments in the match that make me gasp because Skrapper doesn’t just get riding time and take control of arguably the baddest boy in the stable: he humiliates him. Folding KV up, sitting on his face, and peeling the vicious bastard’s trunks down to expose his ass in utter helpless humiliation is a position that far bigger and more accomplished wrestlers have only dreamed of.

It’s not easy, but clearly it’s rewarding to take
Skrapper firmly in hand

This match is also where Skrapper earns his way into the adored ranks of homoerotic wrestling pornboys, the way I count them. Not only do both wrestlers lose their trunks, but KV succeeds in planting his ass across Skrapper’s mouth and, after pummeling Skrapper’s cock forEVER, he teases and strokes that battered joystick back to life until Skrapper erupts in ecstasy, his groans of pleasure muffled up KV’s ass. Holy hell! Have I used that expression already in this post? Those words come out of my mouth multiple times in just about every Skrapper match I’ve had the pleasure to enjoy.

Passing the torch

And speaking of enjoy, it’s so ironic as to seem like fate that Skrapper and Mitch generated such intoxicating chemistry in their voracious mat battle in Catch Weight 3.  The weight differential is simply  too much for Skrapper to make up, but he makes Mitch pay dearly for absolutely any split second of distraction or loss of focus. No wonder at all that he earns a trip hoisted over Mitch’s stone-carved shoulder once all is said and done, to be fireman-carried poolside and tossed in. Illustrating why Mitch has so long been in the ranks of the elite of my favorites, he quickly dove in after his prey to crush him once more in a wet bearhug that merges seamlessly into a make-out session with Skrapper perched across Mitch’s crotch.

I call next!
It seems hard for most of Skrapper’s opponents to resist the temptation to slide their tongues between those beautiful lips sooner or later.  Skrapper’s one victory, prior to knocking Z-Man out cold and wreaking divine retribution on behalf of all of us who’ve screamed at our computer screens when the coverboy broke character and grinned like a Cheshire cat, was a lightweight battle for the books against  perennial jobber Skip Vance. Seriously now. If Skrapper can make the likes of Brook Stetson work his 240 pound ass off to finally tame the feral beast, 135 pound Skip was doomed from well before the start of their Wrestleshack rendezvous. Gorgeously naked bodies, crushed and battered, seamlessly meld into sweat-soaked, fully aroused paramours. Skip hardly seems to mind Skrapper prying his face to the side with a handful of Skip’s hair in order to lock lips and grind crotches.

I’m sure Mitch will always work me hard, but it’s a lightweight, lanky, skater punk wildcat with an obvious lust to dominate that leaves him so loathe to submit that even the big, big boys have no choice but to knock him out cold and carry him from the mat in order to make him quit, who’s in undisputed possession of the top contender spot in my rankings of homoerotic wrestling pornboys who turn me on. And a little word of advice to Trent Diesel: you’d better get your ass back out on the mat soon, pretty boy, because there’s a feral, lanky unstoppable force of nature with a wildly sexy bass voice and a complete lack of awareness of when to give up who’s ready to plow you into second place… dude!

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

September saw a bumper crop of highly entertaining homoerotic wrestling releases! Occasionally, I find the field a bit sparse some months, but that’s not the case as I consider which new release featured the homoerotic wrestler who entertained and turned me on most. Whenever BG East releases a new catalog, they automatically become the wrestling to beat for my monthly title. Catalog 89 is no exception to that rule. From Florida Fights 3, Kirby Stone, Mitch Colby, and Cole Cassidy rise to the top of my affections. In fact, Kirby’s fierce beatdown and ownership over Reese Wells was unexpectedly moving, and I’m instantly craving more of the nasty babyface with that fantastic ass! The Science of Scissors pushes my buttons hard from start to finish, and Rio Garza, Jimmy Gee, Trent Blayze and Attila Dynasty could all equally merit the crown. Patrick Donovan’s Wrestler Spotlight makes me wonder how it’s possible that Patrick has never possessed one of my titles, not to mention the always enticing stylings of Tyrell Tomsen and Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!), who’s still chomping at Kid Karisma’s ass to muscle his way back into the top contender spot for my favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division. Muscle god Dev Michaels, sexy rookie Lucky Loko, Jonny Firestorm (and especially his forearms) and Brook Stetson (both looking to claim the monthly title a second time) put in fabulous bids for September’s homoerotic wrestler of the month distinction. And still more from BG East, Cain McDonald’s amazingly hot ass, Z-Man’s coverboy pecs, and Skrapper’s intense, primal sexuality have all made me do a double take at Mat Scraps 1. And double rookie debut Magnus and Surge both put up completely competitive performances for Wrestle Worship 3. Rio Garza gets a second nod for his Can-Am appearance working out some long-built frustrations for that astonishingly long line of heel beatdowns, working over perpetually over-the-top Jobe Zander in Rio’s Revenge. From Rock Hard Wrestling, another two former homoerotic wrestler of the month title holders bring a fantastic ring battle to be considered this month: Jake Jenkins and Lucas Payne.
There were a lot of other releases in September that tempt me to make this long list even longer. But I’m drawing the line there. The rest, however delightful, are only also rans for my affections. That’s already 22 wrestlers working me hard, making this one of the tough, tough calls in the history of my homoerotic wrestlers of the month. Regular readers know that I frequently find myself moved most by the unconventional choices, the wrestlers who may not be the prettiest or appear to be the most popular in the discussion groups. With that caveat in mind, I’m boldly stepping forward, lifting the crown, and placing it squarely atop the shaggy brown mop of hair atop the head of…
Z-Man.

Yes, perhaps my tastes this month uncharacteristically overlap with the majority (though I don’t think Neilsen’s actually has hard numbers on viewership of homoerotic wrestling). I’m not ashamed to say that the pretty, pretty, pretty (pretty, pretty, pretty) prettyboy Z-Man turned me on arguably the most for his Mat Scrap with one of my long-time, low burning crushes: Skrapper.
There’s always an inherent tension in picking a homoerotic wrestler of the month based on matches released in the prior month. For one thing, it takes two to tango, so to speak, so a particularly fantastic match is seldom built on the performance of just one wrestler. Mat Scraps 1 is a case in point. I’m turned on more and more every time I see Skrapper in action (keep your eyes open for more news on that front). His absolutely lovely delivery of both pain and humiliation on Z-Man is testimony first and foremost to his quickly evolving homoerotic wrestling expertise. He dishes out precisely measured portions of agony and ego-busting embarrassment, and he displays the coverboy’s picture perfect physique with incredible generosity. And I’ve got to say there’s something astonishingly sexy about Skrapper’s deep, bass voice. Not everyone who uses the word “Dude” with such frequency has the same effect on me, but that voice of his rumbles out of some deep, dark place where a seriously ferocious, primal lust to dominate lives.

So it should come as no surprise that Skrapper could just as easily been crowned this month for his work with Z-Man. However, it’s upon Z-Man that I’m placing the crown of laurel, because for a smokin’ hot hunk who’s always had a truck full of potential for homoerotic wrestling entertainment, for me this is the first time I’ve thought his delivery fully lived up to his potential. I’m being unkind when I say that I wasn’t always sure from Z-Man’s work with other companies whether he was burning at full wattage. There’s something bordering on thick-headed about his persona in the past, and pretty and smart turn me on about 100 times more than pretty and dumb. But I feel like in Mat Scraps, I got a glimpse of not just a pretty face (and ass, and pecs, and biceps, and ass, and ass…), but a clever hunk who can tell a story on the mats. He suffers exquisitely in Skrapper’s machinations, but Z-Man also remembers where they are in the plot. When Z-Man’s upper lip curls in fury as he rips apart Skrapper’s crotch like a Thanksgiving wishbone, the symmetry is beautiful. In almost the precise place and position in which Z-Man himself had been ripped apart earlier in the match, he gets his revenge on the wiry one.

It’s not as if I’ve ever not been turned on by Z-Man in still frame. His body is a work of art. His milky smooth skin stretched over an extraordinary gym body is captivating. But more than ever before, I believe Z-Man in Mat Scraps. I believe that he’s seriously pissed off that a skinny skater punk should dare to treat him with such contempt. I believe that he’s hurting, that those fists driving deep into the thick muscles of Z-Man’s pecs seriously smart. I believe that the Z-Man has some actual ego invested in meeting his opponent toe-to-toe, in not being made a fool of, in showing that he can corral the innate ham within and bring to bear all that strength, beauty, and yes, even smarts, to give every impression that he wants to be a competitor.

I get this match. Somehow, it seems like this match gets me. Skrapper is a stud that I’ll have more to say about soon, but today, this month, it’s Z-Man that I’m happily rolling back my prior bitchy criticisms of. He delivers powerful, personality-filled, ego-invested wrestling that I enjoyed without reservation. If I’ve ever offended Z-Man for being less than generous in the past, I’m contented to say that he’s made a believer out of me today. And if ever he feels the need to smack me around a little and lock my head between his fabulous legs and squeeze, I’ll certainly understand!

What’s Been Unsaid

After nearly about a month and a half, I can finally spit out the metallic taste of blood from my mouth! When I made my pilgrimage to BG East in August, I was treated to the privilege of seeing photos from all of the catalog 89 new releases. It was a profound thrill, like being told that I, and I alone, could open all of my Christmas presents a week early. But then I couldn’t talk about it! I couldn’t write about it! I couldn’t obsess on the pages of this blog about each and every tantalizing, confidential morsel from catalog 89 that made my mouth water. I’ve been biting my tongue non-stop since August 5th, and I’m overjoyed that BG East has released catalog 89 for purchase. Let the obsessive reviewing begin (and the healing of my bitten tongue)!!!

I’m just hitting a few highlights for today, because there’s just too much that I’ve had bottled up that I’ve got to say about so many of the new releases. So in addition to nearly making want to cry to see Mitch Colby barefoot in the ring in Florida Fights 3, I’ve been aching to comment on match #1 from that same DVD. Hell and damnation! Kirby Stone can WEAR a pair of skintight shiny pink trunks! That ass has most certainly caught my attention!
Pretty much precisely the same thing has to be said about Cain McDonald in his appearance (taking fall #1!!!) against Mikey Vee. The legs and ass on this grappler make me gasp! That face looks just about too juvenile to feel entirely guilt-free about, but that lower body is 100% guilt-free adult male entertainment.
Next up on the comments burning a whole in my belly: Dev Michaels looks like a fucking monster in the ring against slender, unclassically but undeniably handsome newbie, Lucky Loko. Man alive the two of them make for an astonishingly arousing picture! The fact that Lucky didn’t run screaming from the building on sight of Dev makes him a hot commodity in my book.
And speaking of monsters in the ring (I’ve been DYING to use that line!), has it escaped anyone’s attention that Attila Dynasty appears to be smuggling major meat in his trunks in his scissor fest against Trent Blaze?!!! If the summer Olympics have taught me anything, they’ve taught me that gymnasts are sexy as hell, and the pics of Attila’s acrobatics in the ring have caught me completely off guard. I had no idea from his debut to expect either all that Attila can accomplish without his feet on the ground, or the massive ballast in the pouch of those powder blues (I’m heading back to Backyard Brawls 7 right now for another look).
Next up, it simply must be said that the sight of Z-Man clawing Skrapper’s chest and swinging for the rafters makes me just about ready to pop right here and now. If I know Skrapper, however, Z-Man better not count him out a moment too soon!
And I’ve been anticipating the hating for a while, but I call it like I see it. And as much as the sight of Rio Garza’s body getting worked over (and that face crushed between his opponent’s legs) is like icing on the cake, the pics of Jimmy Gee’s slabs of beef that are his muscled ass has got the be the most delicious main course in this match for me.
I’ve also been aching to say that it’s about time for another installment of Wrestle Worship. I love this concept. I need more of this concept. And newbies Magnus and Surge appear to dish up an extraordinary amount of eroticism with delightful proportions of both wrestling and body worship. Does anyone else wonder if Magnus requires his own zip code? And speaking of numbers, does anyone have Surge’s telephone #!?
Again, I’ve been dying to celebrate the return of ripped, rock hard Tyrell Tomsen. I can’t think of a better opponent to pick apart a bodybuilder adonis than the likes of sexy-assed veteran Patrick Donovan.

And finally, Mr. Joshua, Patrick, barefoot, in the ring, with Patrick’s testicles getting crushed in Mr. J’s fist… You’ll have to excuse me now. I need to rehydrate after writing those words. I’m sure you’ll be hearing much, much more from me about all of this in the future.

Bard’s Fantasy League Picks

When Z-Man debuted with BG East 3 months ago, a regular reader emailed me to let me know just how excited he was by this news. He immediately speculated on who from the BG East roster Z-Man should wrestle next. Turns out, he hit the nail right on the head, proposing that a Z-Man v Kid Karisma bout would be over the top arousing.

Of course, now we know, Z-Man followed up his mat debut with BG East with a pro ring muscle match against none other than Kid K. Nice call, savvy neverland reader! And your prediction that a Z-Man v Kid K match would be smokin’ was perfect prognostication.

From a different angle, Cage Thunder recently called out both BG East rookie Austin Cooper AND proposed a detailed ring match scenario against Austin’s rookie buddy, Jake Jenkins. I’ve got a major league crush on Jake,  so Cage’s proposal to face him in the ring is fueling my imagination. Jake in white trunks with pale blue trim, then 30 minutes after stepping into the ring with Cage, stripped naked, pounded into a daze and helpless in Cage’s skilled hands… well, this concept is pure gold, in my estimation.

All of this speculation, proposal and prognostication sheds light on what I assume must be a nearly universal mental exercise that wrestling kinsters play: the fantasy homoerotic wrestling card. At least, I’ve been playing that game for as long as I’ve been erotically captivated by wrestling. I love that these virtual connections available to us now, like blogs and emails, give us the opportunity to compare notes. So, in addition to a Cage on Jake Jenkins ring strip battle, here are the current top 3 fantasy league homoerotic wrestling matches on my scorecard:

Lon Dumont v Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!)

I’ve fantasized about this combination long and hard. Not only would this settle once and for all the question of who deserves the title of my favorite homoerotic wrestler – non-pornboy division (but remember, it’s about who turns me on the most, not necessarily who “wins”), I also think this would be an absolutely amazing mash-up of two delightfully different sets of assets.

Thiago Diaz v Brad Rochelle
I haven’t even had an opportunity to see if Thiago has anything at all to offer in the wrestling ring other than that fantasyman bod and that hefty package dangling between his legs, but I’m already lining him up for some rookie initiation. The return of Brad has been a long-held aching fantasy of mine (and many others, I know), and I think Brad working over Thiago’s muscles from top to bottom would be an earth-shaking combination of veteran fan favorite with jaw dropping rookie sensation.

First of all, Kid V partnering with Rafe Sanchez has long haunted my homoerotic wrestling dreams. Second, I’ve nursed a whole lot of lust for a PG-to-R-rated evolution of the careers of pretty, innocent, eager muscle boys Cody and Travis. I picture this as both a coming-of-age wrestling scenario for the bright-eyed boys as well as Rafe’s first apprenticeship match, learning from the master of sadism himself.

What are your fantasy league homoerotic wrestling matches of choice?

Tightening Bard’s Belt

My post on the cost of my wrestling kink generated a lot of feedback. One nice result from my nervous confession that I’ve never tracked down permission from Can-Am to repost their pics is that I got an email from Can-Am giving me permission to repost their pics (thanks!).

Thiago Diaz and Jobe Zander – Can-Am’s Decrotchery

Speaking of which, I had to pick my jaw up off the floor when I saw the preview pics of Jobe Zander’s new match for Can-Am against one of the hottest new muscle bodies I’ve seen in a long time, who goes by the name Thiago Diaz. Thiago is absolutely phenomenal to look at in still frame.  My head is about to explode in anticipation of seeing if he’s just as kinetically hot and whether he can sell some sweet homoerotic wrestling. The sustained ball torture he appears to endure in his rookie debut entitled Decrotchery looks like seriously nasty shit of the variety that Jobe specializes in. If Thiago shows up in Can-Am’s series Pro Sex Fights, I may need CPR (preferably delivered by Thiago).

Rusty Stevens and Kevin Crowes – Can-Am’s Pro Sex Fight 4

And speaking of my jaw dropping (and hot muscle bodies and Pro Sex Fights), Can-Am has also posted in their store their newest Pro Sex Fight starring former long-time holder of the title as my favorite homoerotic wrestling pornboy, Rusty Stevens! I don’t know what this means for Rusty’s announcement that he was retiring from porn last autumn. But knowing nothing other than that Rusty has climbed into the pro wrestling ring, I can already say with absolutely certainty that he’s back in contention to slam, squeeze, pound and fuck his way through the ranks of my favorite homoerotic wrestlers. And this rookie that he’s squaring off against is making my head spin with almost as much velocity as Thiago Diaz! Kevin Crowes is devastatingly handsome, constructed like a go-go boy addicted to his workout endorphins, and sporting what looks to an epic cock and major league, aesthetically gorgeous ink. Smart money might be on Rusty totally owning the rookie hunk, but then again, Rusty’s long resume of wrestling domination doesn’t feature much ring action at all, and this very well may be the first time that I’ve ever seen Rusty out-prettied by an opponent (possibly with the exception of David Taylor).

Jake Jenkins and Austin Cooper – BG East’s Ripped Rookies 1: A Score to Settle

In addition to the happy bonus of getting word that Can-Am is okay with me reposting, joining the ranks of the generous folks at BG East, Thunder’s Arena, and Rock Hard Wrestling, my post on the cost of wrestling kink also generated some sincere efforts from several folks giving me advice about what subscription I ought to choose to be the one to drop. Jon gave me more of a psychological assessment of my core beliefs and motivations, concluding that his read on my equivocation is that I should drop Can-Am and Thunder’s. Off line, I had one adamant reader insist that once you’ve seen one Naked Kombat, you’ve seen them all, so I shouldn’t expect anything too new or novel to need to keep investing in them. Someone also made the most fair point that the real cost-benefit ratio should be measured at the top end of the discounts that all 4 of my subscriptions offer (even if I’m too undisciplined to budget the big bucks for one time per year cost savings).

Leo Forte & Trent Diesel – Naked Kombat – The Bondage Match June 22, 2011

With that in mind, let me point out that I could get 365 days of BG East Arena delights for $125. A year of Can-Am Max and the opportunity to pine over the likes of Thiago Diaz would set me back $179.95. The most cost-efficient means of enjoying Thunder’s Arena’s Thunder TV is 90 days for $59.99 on a recurring bill (not sure why a non-recurring 90 days should suddenly jump up to $100… should that be a year?), which would equate to $240 for a full 360 days. And finally, for Naked Kombat’s exclusive content, I could be maximizing the fuck for the buck with their 1-year subscription at $169.99.

Z-Man and Dallas – Thunder’s Arena’s Custom Match

Since I’m not made of money, and since I anticipate some big bills coming up related to a barrage of travel obligations in the next 6 months, I feel like the cost-benefit analysis brings me to an unmistakable conclusion. Thunder TV, I’m afraid, is the weakest link. I’m going to sign back off of them, regretfully, but I’ll check with Joe at Ringside at Skull Island for any can’t miss new releases that he reviews from Thunder’s. Thanks to everyone who gave me your thoughtful advice. Now, if anyone has any other wrestling kink websites out there that I’m not tracking, let me know if you think I’m missing out on some major kink gold. And of course, should Rock Hard Wrestling come out with an exclusive content membership option, I’ll have to reconsider everything. It would require a whole new cost analysis of my overall wrestling kink budget, of course…