Class Warfare

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Damien Rush moves into BG East to execute an
unfriendly takeover bid.

Hell, yes! My latest crop of BG East new releases arrived on my birthday, and what a sweet, sweet birthday present! There’s so much to enjoy, and I’m trying to pace myself. Self-restraint is not my strong suit, but I’m working on savoring each taste deliberately. I’ve spent the most time so far in the high class, blue blood company of silver spoon fed pretty boy rookie, Damien Rush in Strip Stakes 3.

The coiffed rookie looks down his nose at Morgan Cruise.

Wowzers! What’s a trust fund baby, who gets off on wrestling, to do with all his time when he’s not cashing daddy’s checks? If you’re Damien Rush, you hire a personal trainer to muscle up and learn some ring moves; you purchase some tailored, shiny ring gear; and I’m guessing you probably spend a day at the spa getting a facial, a full body massage, and expert manscaping to look just about as gorgeous and invincible as you feel. Finally, click that “wrestle for bg east” tab at the bottom of the website and let The Boss know when you’ll be arriving and that you require Perrier and fois gras in your dressing room.

Damien’s punishing legs and bulging crotch are perfect for homoerotic wrestling!

I’d never really thought of Morgan Cruise as a blue collar champion, but that’s why The Boss is The Boss. The contrast between these two gorgeous men is subtle, but impossible to miss. The trust fund baby is long and lean and classically handsome. He shows up in designer shades and his tuxedo jacket, dripping with condescension and class privilege. He’s clean around all the edges, strong chin, $300 haircut…. When Morgan the Mastodon catches his first sight of Damien, Morgan looks like the line worker who’s walked into a jacket-and-tie-required 3-star restaurant.  Hunky, cocky, heel-bent Morgan succumbs to the power of social class politics, falling silent, literally slack-jawed, and passively allowing the aristocrat to shove his sunglasses into his hands like his personal valet.

Morgan is determined to make the trust fund baby pay up

I have to admit that 30 seconds into this match I was guessing that burly Morgan was about to squash Damien in what was destined to be a back alley mugging. And without a doubt, Morgan pretty quickly humbles the trust fund baby for looking down his nose at him. But even if Damien doesn’t have the ring experience of the Mastodon, he apparently has all the training that daddy’s bank account can buy. He takes some early offense from Morgan and, with impressive skills for an untested rookie, turns the tide and puts curly-haired Morgan on his back. Damien’s long, lovely legs are his strong suit. He nearly squeezes the will to keep fighting out of rough-around-the-edges Morgan, crushing his kidneys between his knees.

Morgan strips and pummels while Damien struggles for air
 through the crotch of his own trunks.

“Nearly,” is a dangerous word in the world of BG East, however. Once Morgan shakes off his socially proscribed class insecurity, he not only hammers the trust fund baby into a stupor, but he also begins to seriously, almostly lovingly relish making and watching his opponent suffer. The Mastodon seems to be particularly infatuated with watching Damien’s handsome face (and who blames him?) contorted, twisted, and screwed up in toothy, open-mouthed agony. The hot aristocrat is made of surprisingly tough stuff, though, and even when the match momentum is burying him hopelessly, he holds out longer than I’d have guessed a trust fund baby could manage, bitterly resisting acknowledging that he’s been humbled by a “little man” from the other side of the tracks.  Pretty boy finally gives away the first submission, however, and Morgan decides right then and there that just beating the blue blood is completely insufficient. He decides that he must humble the arrogant aristocrat completely, stripping him out of his skin-tight, tailored, royal purple trunks and shoving them over Damien’s face, where they stay for almost all of the second fall as Morgan flings and pounds the arrogant rookie all over the ring.

Morgan is entranced by the sight of the suffering he’s inflicting.
Damien’s body is incredibly tasty, and tastier and tastier with each item of clothing he loses! When Morgan traps him in the ropes, Damien’s agony and vulnerability are a feast for the eyes. His cries and whimpers are music to my ears. And the trust fund baby’s ample package is provocatively propped on top of the middle rope like a trophy on the mantel.  Right about then, I’m guessing Damien was wishing that he had his wrestling tutor at ringside to coach him out of his humiliating predicament. Happily, however, he does not.
Naked wrestling and an explosive ramrod rookie debut!
As I mentioned, this is not a squash. Damien wrestles with impressive bursts of technical skill and speed, and when he’s down to nothing but a bare assed g-string, his humiliation seems to trigger a ferocious warrior-within.  With a rage in his eyes that turns me ON, he out-hustles, slams, and pins hunky Morgan to his back for a fantastic small package 3-count that stuns Morgan so completely that Damien is able to strip him out of his signature square cuts and shove them over the Mastodon’s face for some crowing tit-for-tat revenge. But do not doubt that the 99% are done with getting shafted. Morgan takes some beating, but his designs on capturing the title of BG East’s resident heel extraordinaire will not be denied by the likes of gym-toned Damien. In a move that shocks me (despite the title of this product), both of these battlers end up battling in nothing but their boots before the end, and once Damien has exhausted everything in his reserves, Morgan delights in wrapping the naked stud back up in the ropes and torturing him helplessly in a gratuitous, sweat-dripping full nelson. Just as he looks like he’s about to pop Damien’s head right off his neck, we finally get the answer of why, really, a blue blooded trust fund baby would click on the “wrestle for bg east” tab on the website. With nowhere left to go, conquered in body and soul, humbled and humiliated like no one has ever managed before, Damien not only gets hard, he can’t help himself but begin stroking his cock. His groans of agony mix with groans of ecstasy, as Morgan watches on, as if enraptured by the sight of the outcome of his power and mastery of his opponent.
The 99% get their’s in the end.

There are two epiphany moments for me in Strip Stakes 3. First, I’m stunned by this barnburner rookie debut. Showing up with all that personality hanging out, all of those devastatingly gorgeous looks, and ready to put absolutely every inch of his body on the line for the match that introduces him to BG East fans is earth shaking. He’s incredibly sexy, and the glimpse of him enraged, ferocious, and powering on top gives me a double shot of adrenaline. The idea of a Mr. Moneybags lie-cheat-and-steal his way to the top-of-the-heap homoerotic wrestler (who’s, incidentally, g-g-g-gorgeous!) is an idea whose time has surely come! My second epiphany in this match is how astonishingly sexy it is to see Morgan Cruise turn the volume up to 11 when it comes to homoeroticism. Seriously, I did not know that the Mastodon had it in him to bare it all and let us see just how profoundly he enjoys – no, lusts for – the feeling of dominating and devouring a bare naked opponent.  If Morgan’s wish is, as reported, to take his place among the greatest heels of BG East, I certainly can’t say that he’s on par with the likes of hairy, hunky sadist Brooklyn Bodywrecker… but I can definitely see him on that path. Well done, Morgan! A hearty and enthusiastic welcome to Mr. Rush’s son! And yet another “thank you” to The Boss for producing the sexiest wrestling on tap!

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

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I received this pic and message from Kid Karisma last night:

“Happy birthday… if you were here, you wouldn’t be able to sit!”
My Birthday Present

For those who may not be tracking, for my birthday, I went through the mental exercise of deciding which homoerotic wrestler I’d pick to deliver my spanking in honor of my birthday. There are plenty of wrestlers who I’d be more than happy to be bent over their knees for them to slap my ass repeatedly. But in the end (so to speak), I decided that my top choice for the job would be my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma.

I’m ready to assume the position!

Now, Kid K mentioned that he reads this blog, and he even granted me a dizzyingly delightful interview. But I swear, I wasn’t angling for a shout out by the karismatic one. However, I’m thrilled to get such a sweet gift, and absolutely anything that Kid K would want to do to my ass to make it so sore that I couldn’t sit down would be just fine with me! He’s probably just lucky that I’m not inclined toward stalking, because his message makes me want to track down where “here” is in order to make him pay up.

He’s my favorite for so many reasons…

Do other cultures have tradition of getting spanked on your birthday? I know that there are neverland readers from other parts of the world, so I’m not sure if the concept of swatting someone’s ass to celebrate their birthday translates everywhere. I remember a number of birthdays as a kid getting held down, protesting, as I was spanked, one painful swat for each year. As I explain this for readers who might not have heard of the tradition, it suddenly strikes me how completely bizarre and non-sensical it sounds. I suppose that’s the way with a lot of traditions.

Kid Karisma is practiced at bending a lucky opponent
across his knee.

Now that I’m all grown up (sort of), a little celebratory corporal punishment takes on a whole new significance. If Kid K got down on one knee, I really wouldn’t have to be forced to assume the position, though putting up a token fight would just make it that much hotter. I really wouldn’t sincerely protest feeling the sting of the palm of Kid K’s hand cracking down on my naked cheeks (because let me assure you, I’d insist on them being naked for this ritual!). Sure, I’d make a good show of grunting and whimpering, perhaps even a little pleading for mercy, but it would just be to contribute to the drama of being in the clutches, under the control, and entirely at the mercy of a certain freckle-faced, dimple-chinned, gloriously-gluted, muscleman of my fantasies.

Gorgeous, merciless, and generous!

Thanks, Kid Karisma! Your hold on the top spot of my favorite homoerotic wrestlers us just that much tighter. Poor, lovely Lon Dumont has merely more distance to make up if he thinks he’s going to knock your gorgeous ass off the throne!

The Side Hustle

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I partied hearty for my birthday last week. Just now coming out of the haze, in fact. Happily, I had another little present from Sidelineland contributor Alex. Alex is the extremely talented writer who has contributed stories to the Sidelineland homoerotic wrestling fiction group in the past couple of months. Today I posted his newest story, the latest chapter in his American Wrestling League series, entitled “The Side Hustle.”

Star of chapter 3: AWL’s Dangerous Danny Chase

This AWL story centers on a new early 80’s wrestler trying to get traction in the world of pro wrestling.  Dangerous Danny Chase owns property in jobberville, and he’s increasingly unhappy about the neighborhood. After 5 years in the business, he’s a company man, but he’s now used almost exclusively as window dressing to showcase the headliners. What’s a disillusioned young hunk to do with his gasping hopes for fame and glory?

Helpful, hairy hunk, Rex Taylor

Danny’s buddy in the biz, Rex Taylor, suggests a remedy to reanimate Danny’s visions of fortune and fame.  I’ll let you read Alex’s excellent writing for yourself, but needless to say that in a world populated with gay men with a wrestling fetish and spending money, there are always options for wrestlers craving attention and the roar of the crowd. Throw in a gorgeous bodybuilder wearing posing trunks into the mix, and this story is right on target!

Danny’s hopes for glory in the ring are pinned on
5’11”, 250 lb bodybuilder, Coal

Thanks for the excellent birthday present, Alex, and for everyone else who sent along your best wishes.  Life is good, and I’m happy to be living it.

Make Me Feel It!

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Rolando delivers the whacks on Mike Paris in BG East’s Ringwars 7
I know somebody who needs a spanking today… and that somebody is me!
Bruce Hill and Trenton Comeaux bend over and take it
like men from Eduardo in Can-Am’s All American Oil Trio Muscle Bash
It’s my birthday! I love my birthdays. I have friends who dread them, but I’ve never had a birthday that I didn’t look forward to. You know what they say about the alternative. Another year older is another year not being dead yet, and I love life. So bring on spanking!
It must have been Peter Bishop’s birthday when he wrestled Dino Phillips
in BG East’s X-Fights 11
Normally, spanking isn’t exactly my thing. I mean, physical domination and humiliation works for me (like I need to tell a neverland reader that!), but spanking for the sake of spanking isn’t at the top of my list of what I need. But a birthday isn’t a typical day, and particularly after searching for some hot photos of homoerotic wrestlers leaving a handprint on some shiny, bare assess, I know what I’m wishing for as I blow out my birthday cake candles. 
Brad Rochelle leaves a mark on Billyboy’s vulnerable cheeks in BG East’s Demolition 2
I had decided to come up with a list (because I seem to be all about lists and awards lately) of the homoerotic wrestlers I’d most prefer to deliver my whacks. The image of Brad Rochelle’s fingerprints outlined in angry red across Billyboy’s lucky ass in BG East’s Demolition 2 quickly popped into my mind. I’d lie about it being my birthday once a month if it meant I’d be forced to assume the position across Brad’s thigh!
Cameron Mathews won’t soon forget to call him
Mr. Joshua after his Wrestler Spotlight encounter

My perpetual crush on BG East’s Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) makes me strongly identify with the lucky, lovely bubble butt of Cameron Mathews getting wedgied and swatted a hot red under the complete control of Mr. Joshua’s gorgeous body for Cameron’s Wrestler Spotlight.  I’d refuse to call him “Mr. Joshua” for at least 42 whacks (or so), just to soak in the sublime ecstasy of suffering a Joshua Goodman humiliation!

Love hurts in BG East’s Sexy Showdown 6

The image of ripped, studly twink Skip Vance landing a cracking open palm across his lover’s naked ass in BG East’s Sexy Showdown 6 works for me as well, with extra credit for the fact that the lanky lover getting spanked here is none other than reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month, Christian Taylor (aka Chris Cox).  The sweetest birthday present of all would probably be joining in on this intensely erotic homo wrestling fun, trading places with each of these gorgeous boys giving and taking my butt clenching smacks!

Skip gets it back from Mike Martin in BG East’s Wet & Wild 4 

Of course, Skip taking his whacks is also an inspiring sight, with handsome hottie Mike Martin sitting on his face and yanking down his trunks. Yep, this would be my choice of the preferred position for me to be forced to assume for my birthday spanking.

Kid Karisma leaves Z-Man’s glutes quivering in Summer Sizzlers 2
But all right, if I have to pick the one homoerotic wrestling hunk to make celebrating hurt so good… if I’m backed into a corner and required to pick just one out of the lineup of my favorite wrestlers to star in my own personal spanking birthday fantasy, truth be told, I’d pick my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma. The reasons are many, but first and foremost, Kid K clearly enjoys the task… a lot!  His evil laughter at yanking Z-Man’s trunks up his crack and making the playboy model spasm in shock at the hard swat sends chills down my spine while warming my crotch delightfully.

Headscissors-as-excuse for an ass slapping.
Kid Karisma absolutely tenderized the twinky ass of fierce little Len Harder for boatloads of Florida Fun. From just about every angle, Kid K beat on Len’s skinny ass relentlessly.
Fold-over face-pin underneath Kid K’s crotch? Just another opportunity to slap ass!
And as Kid Karisma himself made quite clear, he’s nothing if not the life of the party. So definitely, to celebrate my day I’m thinking of a certain red-headed, musclebound, freckle faced, bubble-butted beauty to pin me down, sit on my face, and pound out slow, nothing-held-back whacks across my bare ass, raising a perfectly harmonized chorus of my cries of pain and Kid K’s rumbles of sadistic laughter.

Then let’s turn down the lights, turn up the house music, and dance until I drop on my bright red, aching, happy ass in exhaustion! Life is good!

A Tough Little Shit

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Joe at Ringside at Skull Island has detailed what’s going so right in gay underground wrestling to produce the likes of Rock Hard Wrestling’s latest release, pitting brawny golden boy Austin Cooper against Eli “the Shutdown” Black. As is so often the case, I agree with Joe in every point he raises. Continuing my own train of thought after learning from Joe’s reflections, I’m compelled to linger a little longer on this little piece of the mountain of evidence that this is, indeed, Eli Black Month.

Bodyslam breaks down this gorilla press to perfection!

“I’m supposed to wrestle you?” Austin asks when he climbs into the ring and takes a look at Eli. “I don’t know, dude, you’re kinda small. Do you wanna, like, play a board game or something you might be able to win at?” Eli’s just a couple inches shorter than the golden boy, but he’s giving up an astonishing 30 pounds of thick, mouthwatering muscle. However, the words “giving up” and “Eli Black” in the same sentence are an unlikely combination. “Sounds to me like you’re just trying to find an excuse to not get your ass beat by somebody smaller than you,” Eli responds to Austin’s taunts, cool as ice.

“Wow, dude!” Austin chuckles. “Guy’s got a little mouth on him.” Indeed, as Joe points out, this 3-fall match is a gorgeous and athletic rendition of the classic big-vs-little pro wrestling battle that’s been told for generations. While the path has been well-worn, Austin and Eli walk it very, very entertainingly.  Austin suggests opening with a game of mercy (aka, “test of strength”). Eli’s ego is about 4 time bigger than his ripped to shreds body, so he of course (possibly foolishly) agrees. They lace their fingers together and flex their wrists. Eli pours out everything he’s got, straining and huffing and puffing. Austin rolls his eyes and then looks at the camera, demonstrating that he isn’t about to break a sweat.  “Don’t mock me!” Eli snarls through gritted teeth, his pride already injured a couple of minutes into the action.

Austin hangs Eli from the ropes like laundry on the line

There are two Austin Coopers in this match, and both of them combined into one person are exponentially sexier than either one on his own. First, there’s Austin, budding into potentially “the dreamiest heel of all time,” as Joe puts it. It’s not as if he needs to break the test of strength with a sucker-shot knee lift to Eli’s gut. He clearly doesn’t need to pick up and twist Eli’s taut muscles like a pretzel, hanging him like freshly rung laundry from the ropes in order to pound his knee into Eli’s legendary rock hard core. It’s not like Austin needs to kick Eli when he’s down. But like asking Mallory  “why climb Everest,” Austin dishes out unnecessary roughness all over Eli’s battered body for a simple reason: because it’s there. But there’s another Austin Cooper in the ring in this match. He’s every bit as beautiful, bulging, and brawny. But he’s a sensitive, empathic playmate checking on Eli’s well-being with concern. “Are you all right?” he asks with apparent sincerity, even moments before that other Austin rains down another barrage of fists to Eli’s abs. “I’ll help you up,” Austin offers when Eli is struggling to pull himself up to his feet, a half a second before that other Austin bends over, wraps his bronzed, muscled arms around Eli from behind, and hoists the fierce scrapper up off his feet into yet another rear bearhug.  After evil Austin rings out one of the sexiest OTK backbreaker submissions I’ve ever seen, Eli starts round 2 cringing and clutching his throbbing lower back. “You really did a number on my back for that one!”Eli snarls angrily. Empathic Austin replies, “Yeah. I feel bad for that. Come on, let’s just go…” But just as amiable Austin is helpfully about to suggest that Eli take a breather in the corner, evil Austin suddenly sucker punches Eli and laughs at him for being so gullible.

The agony and the ecstasy – The most gorgeous wrestling pic ever?

Both Austin Coopers learn not to underestimate every ounce of the dangerous 140 pounder in front of them. One taunt too many, one humiliation to far, and Eli’s MMA training kicks on like autopilot just as Eli seems to be too dazed to defend himself. Primus goes to work on one joint after another, effectively neutralizing all those golden muscles of Austin’s and, more importantly, shutting him the hell up!  He pries Austin’s left knee backward so severely that the “big boy” is in danger of having his own boot shoved up his ass (with his foot still in it!). “Kiss your boot!” Eli snaps angrily, ready to dish out just as much humiliation as he can take. Eli is like a swarm of bees, stinging all over Austin’s luscious body leaving the golden boy with nothing to do but writhe and squirm, defenseless to even know where the next stinger will land.  “It’s a shame your tag team partner Jenkins ain’t here, big boy, to save you!” Eli’s crotch-ripping grapevine displays his fierceness and Austin’s mouthwatering physique, both to perfection. “Time to finish this!” Eli growls through gritted teeth. “And it’s going to end with you lookin’ like a bitch!”

Crucified and just so much workout accessory

Falls even at one a piece, there’s mutual respect filling up all the open spaces between these two cocky young athletes. “You’re a tough little shit,” Austin grudgingly admits. “You surprised me a bit.”  Eli grins at having forced that reluctant praise out of his 30 pound bigger opponent. “I told you,” he replies, “I gotta get my name out there.”  The final fall is down and dirty. Eli paints on still another coat of humiliation, taunting and toying with vulnerable Austin when the golden boy is completely under his control. But Eli’s got 2 strikes going against him. Strike one: he’s fighting 2 different Austin Coopers at the same time, and that fact seems to unsettle even scrapper Eli on occasion, not knowing who he’s facing from moment to moment. Strike two: Eli puts 110% effort into absolutely every move, every hold, every punch, stomp, and slam. Sure, that puts the “big boy” on his back repeatedly, but Eli’s body has taken a serious beating by the time round 3 is well under way. Another atmospheric belly-to-belly splash delivered by Eli clearly hurts “the Shutdown” at least as much as it damages Coop. Sure, a flying cross-body slams Austin to his back, but getting up (slowly), it’s Eli who’s clutching at his throbbing abdominal muscles, quivering from the impact. Even 110% of what he’s got left in his tank isn’t enough for Eli to pull off a second flying cross-body, and the bronzed muscle boy catches him in mid-air. It’s steadily downhill from there for Primus. Once a ship the size of Austin has managed to change the direction of this match, there’s just nothing for Eli to do against wave after wave of Austin’s size advantage crashing squarely and repeatedly into Eli’s battered back. Evil Austin does leg presses with Eli crucified across his back helplessly.  The ultimate indignity (just ask Kid Karisma), Austin drops his meaty ass like dead weight across Eli’s quivering lower back.

The RHW camera work is, as always, incredible. The high definition close up of Eli’s sweat-soaked face contorted in agony as he writhes on the mat with Austin circling like a lion toying with his lunch is nothing short of exquisite.  Austin plays the possibly psychopathic split-personality heel to perfection, leaving you never quite sure if he’s certifiable, or if he could really and truly possess a viscously sadistic sarcasm that dry. And although this doesn’t quite turn out the way “the Shutdown” probably intended, I’m not about to doubt for even a second that Eli’s soaking up his lessons in the school of hard knocks, conceding the battle in order to win the war and accomplish his explicit goal: to take over the underground wrestling world. It’s Austin Cooper and Austin Cooper winning the match. But this is Eli Black’s Month.

*My thanks to Rock Hard Wrestling for sending me some unpublished stills from this match to post here. All shots from RHW are used with permission, and as gorgeous as they are (that shot of Austin’s crotch ripping in half with Eli looking on like an evil genius might be my fav homoerotic wrestling pic ever), they’re just at taste of how hot the action-in-motion is in this match!

Still-Frame Fantasies

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I’ve got deadlines piling up and work crushing me from all angles, but BG East’s weekend release of catalog 92 was awfully distracting for me. I cannot wait to get my hands on at least a few of these matches. Always a fan of hot new finds, my blood is pumping that much faster for an astonishingly hearty spring harvest of new-to-me wrestler newbies.  I often find that the wrestlers who turn me on hardest in still-frame and the wrestlers who turn me on the hardest in action are only occasionally, not always, the same. So, just judging in still-frame, these rookie delights are making me ache to discover if they’re as hot in motion!

BG East’s Diego Diaz
Just for fun, let me put these gorgeous new “faces” in order of who’s making my mouth water the most in still-frame. Starting off, there’s BG East’s Diego Diaz, who looks like he delivers some mind-boggling muscle bashing on goldenboy patriot, Austin Cooper in Florida Fights 4. Diego’s listed as 6’3″ and 184 pounds and the match description is summing up exactly what I’m seeing. “Diego is a discovery – long, lean, sexy as fuck…” The description seems to suggest that Diego may have been lured into the BG East universe specifically for the purpose of beating the shit out of Austin. I’m hoping  fiercely 2 things: 1) he wrestles as beautifully as the photos and match description imply, and 2) he’s settling in for a long, productive future of muscle bashing at BG East!

BG East’s Damien Rush
It’s an incredibly close call, but Diego just barely beats out lovely new BG East coverboy, Damien Rush, as my #1 still frame crush among the rookies recently taking center stage. Wow, wow, wow! Holy hell, Damien’s sexy, hairy body belongs hanging by his ankles from a stripper pole if ever a body did! 5’11 (or 6′?) and 180 pounds, the tale of the tape seems to put him squarely in the relatively average proportions of moderately fit athletes, but good god, this luscious piece of meat looks way, way above and beyond average! Again, the match description for Strip Stakes 3 (score!) is tantalizing, reporting that Damien is “born to privilege and accustomed to getting his way.” The sexy-as-hell raw fuckability of this silver spoon fed lovely, paired with the photo evidence that he gets stripped naked and keeps on wrestling in his match with heel-rising muscle beast, Morgan Cruise, is sending fireworks exploding in my head. All that promise… I’m breathless in anticipation!
BG East’s Ben Monaco

Mat Rookies’ 1 Ben Monaco is my 3rd place still-frame crush among this current batch of rookies. Hairy pecs, sweaty mat action, and a lip-lock rookie narrative are all major assets to make me crave in-motion evidence that this still-frame hunk is as hot as I think he is. 5’10” tall, 175 pounds, the phrase “one of the meatiest kisses in the history of underground wrestling,” lights a fuse under the powder keg that is my homoerotic wrestling imagination.

Thunder’s Arena’s Kasper

I’m mixing up the roster a bit to insert side of beef Kasper, a new face for Thunder’s Arena. I put Kasper as my 4th most anticipated live-action view after seeing the still-frame previews for his mutual mattress pounding with Thunder’s veteran Batar in No Holds Barred 20.  He’s described as 5’9″ and 185 pounds, and, at least in still-frame, he’s giving me a strong hit of a majorly beefed up, brunette version of Steven Sandvoss. The match description says that Kasper is one of Batar’s “buddies” who likes to give the veteran a hard time for his relatively soft body. If the rookie uses all those bulging muscles to seriously punish his “buddy,” I’ll be a Kaspar fan!

BG East’s Alex Arias

#5 on my list is, possibly, the handsomest face in this crowd. Aforementioned Ben Monaco meets up with Alex Arias in Mat Rookies 1 and, understandably, can’t seem to resist planting his lips across Alex’s gorgeous mouth. Described as 5’8″ and 145 pounds, Alex is one of those finds that might easily be at the top of my live-action favorite lists, but his body, in still-frame at least, isn’t quite as titillating as the impressive hunks ahead of him on this list. That face, though, and in particular those eyes are nothing short of riveting! The combo of these two inspiring hunks makes Mat Rookie’s 1 a product I’m seriously interested in seeing.

BG East’s Ned Nader

And still one more reason to own Mat Rookies 1: new, lean, muscle machine, Ned Nader. While it’s true I’m putting Ned at the bottom of this list, it’s equally true that I’m jonesin’ to see this if this ripped stud is as sexy as he looks in still-frame. It seems like a hard bit of luck to show up for your first BG East mat match and find yourself facing off against pro sensation and one of (or just “the”?) most prolific pro wrestlers across just about every under- and above-ground company in wrestling, Cameron Mathews. Then again, the opportunity to wrestle with Cameron’s phenomenal ass (okay, sure the rest of him as well) may be quite the prize for a ripped little muscle athlete like young Ned. Ned looks like he could be a punk, which may account for my relatively low ranking for him. “Punk” is not often an adjective that is at the top of my list of erotic turn ons. But I’m eager to see what this newbie can do to Cam, and even more importantly, to me.

I just can’t say often enough how much I enjoy high quality and successful recruiting in the business of homoerotic wrestling. The potential that each of these inspiring rookies has in the business and in the end product of cranking my homoerotic wrestling kink, is testimony not only to their raw (and sometimes not so raw) talents, but also to the hard work of the boys behind the cameras keeping this universe populated with not just the go-to boys we’ve come to know and lust after, but with fresh faces and new fantasies that they inspire. Nice work!

Standing Out from All the Rest

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A few months ago, I noted that Steel Muscle God has been continuing to keep it hot and horny, both on his YouTube channel and his site.  For those of you who’ve been living under a rock and missing most of the first year and a half of my blog posts, Steel Muscle God (“SMG,” aka Dan) is a hot piece of man muscle who started posting body worship videos on YouTube, doing private shows, and eventually opened up his own personal pay site (some free stuff there as well). Unlike many similar sites, while SMG is definitely focused on providing mouthwatering material for muscle worshippers, he also has an insightful appreciation for the wrestling fetishists among us. Last month, I decided (in the interest of journalism, of course) to take the plunge and see how hot SMG makes it for paying worshippers.  I’m thrilled to report that I was NOT disappointed! SMG seems to get off on pleasing his fans as passionately as his fans (well, at least I) get off on him!  I was so pleased, in fact, I sent him a note praising him for his devotion to his fans and asking if he’d grant me an interview. He enthusiastically agreed, and as you’ll see below, he’s astonishingly frank, honest, and downright adorable!  You’ll detect that English isn’t SMG’s first language, but he communicates with crystal clarity and the accent does nothing but increase his sexiness by about 25 times.

Steel Muscle God pleasing his fans

Bard: Where did the name “Steel Muscle God” come from?

SMG: When I first signed on YouTube, I wanted a name that would stand out from all the rest. I thought that my muscles are hard as steel, and I was definitely a muscle god, so why not SteelMuscleGod?

Bard: Makes perfect sense to me! I followed you on YouTube for quite a while before I recently joined your website to check out the members-only benefits. You have quite a big and loyal base of fans who comment on your videos and in your website message boards. I get the impression that you have a lot of respect for your fans and that you sincerely enjoy giving them what they want. What do you think about “the guys” who can’t get enough of the Steel Muscle God?

Think you’re better? Prove it!

SMG: I am happy to hear that you have became a member, and I do hope that after this article, there will be many others that will do the same. You are right: people do comment on the videos and on my articles and they do know that I give only the best. I have always respected my fans and their satisfaction has always came first in my book. I live by the motto: If you are happy, I am happy too! I know that being arrogant and disrespectful is what a muscle god is thought to be like, but honestly, I’m not that. As for those who can’t get enough of me, I offer the possibility to do 1-on-1 camshows on skype or yahoo messenger. I flex hard and show off until I am sweaty! And that’s what my guys love!

Bard: Personally, I think that anybody who has a bad word to say about your body is either blind or a moron, but what do you think about the occasional critic who tries to cut you down?

SMG: Haters will always have something to say, no matter what one would do, so I don’t really give a shit about that kind of comments. Some have tried to take me down, by flagging my videos, but as you noticed, I’m still standing. I’m not into quarelling with anybody but all I can say to these kind of people is: Prove it, if you think you’re better than me! After all, I’m still standing and still growing bigger and better!

Bard: Sounds like a healthy, and even sexy, attitude! Your website tells us that your athleticism started with freestyle wrestling. It’s also particularly enjoyable for me to see you bring wrestling into your videos. Even when you aren’t actually wrestling an opponent, you frequently talk about physical domination, like crushing your opponents (or fans!) with your awesome muscles. What does it feel like from your perspective to physically control an opponent with nothing but your steel muscles and your fierce determination?

SMG laughs maniacally as he crushes his (adorable!) skinny
blond friend between his powerful legs.

SMG: I did start with freestyle wrestle, and I can say that it taught me a lot. I might be a nice guy outside the mat but once I stepped into the ring, you will meet the more determined and fiercest opponent ever! I
have only one purpose while there, that is taking you down and making you submit to my muscles!

SMG ties up and takes down
another hunky friend

Bard: As someone who loves wrestling, that’s incredibly hot! You also mention on your website that you “love the feeling of having guys submit to your power.” What wrestling hold or move do you enjoy applying the most? Which one give you the most satisfaction?

SMG: I love when I use my arms or my legs to bring someone to submission. That raw power just gives you the kind of rush that you won’t find elsewhere. And that’s what I really love! I enjoy letting out the animal in me once in a while. IT FEELS AWSOME! Yeah, I do love feeling guys helpless in my presence. I particularly enjoy figure-4 headlock and sleeper hold. Once you get someone into that, you are sure that they will suffer long and good before they will tap out. And I honestly enjoy hearing a guy begging for some air…it’s just fun to hear!

Bard: And it’s fantastic to watch, as well! You’ve got fans who love to worship your pecs. Some clearly go nuts for your gorgeous legs. Your shoulders, your arms, your ass (my personal favorite), even your feet! In your pursuit of “building the ultimate strong and perfect body,” which part of your body do you think is your best feature?

SMG’s muscular development: It’s ALL great!

SMG: I was really hoping you wouldn’t ask me that [laughing]. If guys have one or two favourite muscular groups, I can’t really say which I like best. It’s true that I give particular attention to abs in the gym (training them at the end of every work-out) but I love everything on me. I work each group thoroughly and I try to make the best out of each work-out. That’s why you won’t see any noticeable differences between muscles, with me (e.g. arms and legs or chest and legs).

Bard: Your proportions are definitely amazing. You also have an unmistakable flair for drama and a very fun sense of humor that comes through clearly in your videos. I’ve enjoyed watching the videos of you applying for a job with a naughty employer who demands to see you strip, for example; and the videos where you catch some silly, skinny guy snooping around your things and you make him suffer for it. Have you ever acted?

SMG: I’m happy to hear that you have enjoyed that! I never been in front of the cam before I started this making videos venture, but I have to say that I love impersonating a muscle bully or a demanding muscular guy. I have a bit of everything and that is clearly seen in the videos! I’m just trying to make every video worth watching over and over. If I achieved that, then I’m happy.

Bard: I think all your videos are wonderfully entertaining! I know that you’ve said that you’re officially retired from freestyle wrestling, but have you ever done professional wrestling? Would you consider it in the future?

Daniel Craig’s got nothing on SMG!

SMG: I haven’t done any professional wrestling, but I’d like to try that. I love doing all sort of stuff, and I’m sure it would be lots of fun! Plus, I would be submitting guys and get cheers from the fans! How
cool can that be?!

Bard: I’d be there cheering with the loudest of them! I’ve also enjoyed your sense of humor that comes through in the the videos where you take a “magic potion” that makes you hulk out and rip through your clothes. But for the record, you’re an all-natural bodybuilder, right? No potions?

SMG: The magic potion is definetely a nice idea, but I clearly stated in my YouTube videos and on my site: I’m as natural as I can be and I would NEVER consider taking roids just for the sake of size. I believe that I can achive anything I want just by hard work and determination, and I got plenty of that!

Bard: You occasionally have “co-stars” in your videos, such as that gorgeous bodybuilder you recently posed and wrestled with who almost (but not quite) has as hot a muscle body as you do! Personally, I also think that the skinny blond guy who we’ve seen you beat the crap out of more than once is pretty hot, for a skinny guy. What do your friends think about your online life as the Steel Muscle God, and what do they think about it when you ask them to come on camera with you?

SMG: I try to find the right guys for my videos, and I think I’ve done a good job so far. It’s true that I can do better, but we got plenty of time ahead.  And I will make sure that my friends will know what you
said about them [laughing]. My friends know that I am a demanding muscle guy in front of the cam, but they also know me as the down to earth guy who enjoys a nice ice cream. Some have given an odd look when I mentioned the camera thing but some were quite enthusiastic about it. It’s all up to the guy, I guess!

SMG shows off every divine inch of his body

Bard: Definitely tell your blond friend that he’s got a fan! For people who only watch you on YouTube, they may not be aware that your videos go far beyond what YouTube would allow to be posted. You’ve generously displayed every incredible inch of your muscled body for your fans, including more than a couple intense sessions where you jerk off on camera. First of all, damn! Your cock is every bit as gorgeous as the rest of you! Second, thank you! There are a lot of muscle-worship websites out there that are all tease but no show. Have you ever wrestled naked (and if not, would you consider wrestling naked for your fans)?

SMG’s lats and shoulders bulge gorgeously

SMG: Youtube is a bit of a bitch (if not more) so I would never do the mistake to post “hot” teasers on there anymore.  However, I did post some exciting teasers for my HOT happy ending videos, and I think that the guys who signed up for becoming a member on my site never regretted doing so! I like to go from mild to wild and not shy about letting the world see/know about it. As for nude wrestling, that’d be something that I’d have to try. I just gotta find the right opponent [laughing]. And thanks for appreciating the hot videos. It was awesome doing them, and this way my fans found out what I meant by being able to “bounce every single muscle” on my body.

Bard: It’s definitely not just having steel muscles, but what you do with them. And you do incredible things with your body! I know a few bodybuilders who are quick to point out that they actually have a tough time getting a date. Between working out obsessively, dieting all the time, and just living the disciplined lifestyle that it takes to sculpt muscles like yours, finding time for a personal life seems like it might be hard to do. Do you have a partner (if not, do you date?). What turns you on when you’re looking for someone to be with?

Beach wrestling, anyone?

SMG: The lifestyle of a bodybuilder is not always honey and milk. It does compel you to a strict schedule and diet, but the trick is to find the balance between work and personal life. It took me a while to find it, but once I did, I just try to maintain a healthy work:fun ratio. And dating is fun, though having someone to support you is pretty important.

Bard: I wrote a series of posts on my blog a year ago in which I imagined what a wrestling match might look like between you and another YouTube bodybuilder with his own personal website, Adam400m. I have to say, despite Adam possibly having bigger muscles than you (though surely not as perfectly proportioned), I couldn’t help but picture you conquering him with your steel muscles and that incredibly sexy voice you have. How does it feel to know that you inspire sexual fantasies in an army of Steel Muscle God worshippers?

SMG: Funny you mention that guy. I wrote hima few messages, letting him know that I’d be interested in a pose down and wrestle match (friendly one, of course) . He never replied back, and the same thing happened with another musclegod of YouTube (won’t give his name though). I found out that they can’t handle a challenge! And without any meanness, Adam gave a kick to his muscle by using roids. That’s why I was so keen in meeting him, ’cause I knew that even with bigger muscles he wouldn’t be able to take me down! And yeah, that would’ve been quite a hot video to watch! Let’s just pray that he’ll be answering my messages after this article is posted! It feels good to know that you inspire other people (sexually or in the gym). It’s something that makes me smile, and if possible, I try my best to turn them into reality in one of my videos!

Bard: Well, I love your videos and you’ve provided a ton of fuel for my fantasies. I have to say that I can’t often afford to purchase your pay-videos, but I’ve found your member-site incredibly entertaining and worth the investment. Thank you for taking the time to answer some questions for me and my readers. Is there anything else you’d like to say to the gay guys out there who get turned on by hot guys wrestling?

SMG: I know that not a lot of guys can afford the videos, especially in this period of time, but those who decide to go for the membership, they are definetely doing the right thing! The website is just like my body: it will continuously improve and get better and bigger! That’s a promise and my fans know that I always deliver! I would just have to mention that I’m looking forward to making more wrestle videos. I know that the people are anxiously waiting another match between me and some muscle guy, so I will give my best to make that happen! Keep watching the site and my YouTube posts and let me know if there’s anything you’d like to see in the future! It’s been a pleasure to answer your questions.

Bard: It’s certainly my pleasure, and I look forward to more, bigger, and better Steel Muscle God!

Steel Muscle God delivers on his promises.

Colt’s Comeback

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Alex is entertaining my wrestling kink like crazy lately! I’ve posted his newest story for the Sidelineland group. It’s chapter 2 of his AWL series, in which he tells the story of the erotic back room moments of early 80’s pro wrestling from the point of view of massive, hairy muscle beast Colt Hill. Colt’s young, dumb, and full of cum, and in a time when massive bodybuilders are starting to outshine the tried-and-true bear-bellied battlers of the years prior, Colt’s early career celebrity status isn’t going over well with everyone in the business (though the fans are nuts for him!).

“Colt Hill”

In chapter 1 of the series, Colt tells us the tale of the rub he encounters when veteran bear daddy badboy, Andy Arlington calls the rookie muscle beast out for private beatdown to settle scores for good. If you haven’t read it, I don’t want to spoil it for you, because you’ll want to read it. But I’ll just offer the teaser that both hairy pounders get naked and the stakes steadily rise fall after fall, until somebody’s ass is literally and figuratively in the possession of his opponent.

“Andy Arlington”

Chapter 2 picks up where chapter 1 left off. Colt gets partnered with another up and coming young stud puppy named Kirk Manning. The two appear to be even more successful than the sum of their parts, and they get one push after another to skyrocket in the promotion. Fans are going crazy for the pair of hot hunks, but egos and ulterior motives are destined to come to a head for the two ambitious boys. When the tension boils over, big muscle boys manage to inflict some serious damage on one another. Twice as nasty (and erotic!) as the physical combat is the public and private humiliation that both of these testosterone junkies are determined to inflict on one another.  Hot, hot, HOT, and fantastically written!

“Kirk Manning”

Sidelineland has been getting a lot more new postings than the sister-site, Producer’s Ring, as of late. I’ve got a couple of projects in the works for Producer’s Ring, but with so much on my plate right now, it’ll be a while before they get launched. But do not doubt that the celebrities wrestling their way to power and glory in the Producer’s Ring universe are still hot, horny, and hammering on one another for geopolitical and financial advantage. Sidelineland will also continue as an anthology of erotic wrestling stories from me and others, some with celebrities, a lot with just hard pounding hunks born out of a little visual inspiration and a whole lot of homoerotic wrestling imagination.

Public Service Announcement:

wrestlebard6 Comments
This is Eli Black’s world. You just live in it.

True story: Out of the blue, a few days ago I got an instant message from Primus himself, Eli Black. He said that I’d “probably want to mention on your site that April is ‘Eli Black Month.” Well, hello to you, too, Eli! To what do we owe the honor of celebrating Eli Black Month? Turns out in April it’s going to be raining Eli! And when it rains Eli, it pours!

Eli’s arm raised in victory in the steel cage last weekend

To kick off Eli Black Month, just days ago the Shutdown did his magic all over some unlucky punk on his way to winning a 2nd round submission with a rear naked choke in his most recent MMA fight. For real.  All that muscle and all that attitude don’t just entertain us troops of fans. He’s also one seriously dangerous pit bull in the cage. Can you imagine having that muscled warrior wrapped around you from behind, squeezing you between his legs and slowly, precisely crushing your windpipe with his forearm? Hell. And yes.

UCW’s XanJey grabs a handful of Primus

Eli unilaterally designated April as his month because he’s also got his fine, fine, fine ass due to appear in one wrestling match after another for our corner of the wrestling audience. First up, catch Joe’s review of Eli’s debut appearance at UCW. I haven’t seen the match yet, but Joe has posted a pic of Eli’s opponent crushing Primus’ balls, and his green trunks are clearly wedged way, way up that gorgeous ass Eli’s not shy about mentioning. Truth be told, I’ve heard a little shit about UCW that’s kept me away, but Eli Black on the docket is bringing them some class and a second look from me.

Exclusive shot of the action at RHW: Eli ripping Austin in half (and loving it)

Are an MMA victory and a UCW debut enough to make this Eli Black Month? Don’t answer until you hear this: Just a couple days ago, Rock Hard Wrestling released their latest product, featuring a match up that makes my mouth water just thinking about it: Eli facing Austin Cooper. Eli is giving up 30 pounds to beefy golden boy Austin. He gets rocked (literally) to a first fall submission, those mind-boggling abs stretched so sweetly across Austin’s meaty thigh in an OTK backbreaker, only to inspire Eli to get down and dastardly for a round 2 mauling of Austin’s impressive abs (but let’s face it, he’s no Eli Black). Check Joe at Ringside at Skull Island for the definitive review (I’ll have more to add in a couple days), but holy shit, Austin lifts, tosses, slams, and basically shot-puts Primus all over the place! In the ropes, hanging upside down in the turnbuckle… sweet man alive, Eli takes a hell of a beating and keeps bouncing back for more!

Eli’s rear choke makes Jake Jenkins reconsider the wisdom of this rematch

So an MMA victory, a UCW debut, and a Rock Hard pretty boy pounding? But wait, there’s more! When Eli talked about some of his then-unreleased matches for BG East in my interview in February, it was his re-match against muscle stud Jake Jenkins that caught my (and several readers’) attention first. The advanced release promotional pics that the boys at BG East generously let me post illustrated the best news I’ve heard in months: this is a jockstrap match! I have to think it was a crush of calls from fans desperate to taste this promised delicacy for themselves that resulted in BG East releasing this visual feast of a match as part of Mat Rookies 1 in their just moments ago published catalog 92.

Coming and going: April is Eli Black Month

An MMA victory, a UCW debut, a Rock Hard ring match, and an epic (and extremely rare) BG East rematch with body beautiful Jake Jenkins!? To top it off, Eli gave me the heads up that his birthday is also in April. As always, it’s just hard to argue (or at least win an argument) with Eli Black (unless you’re Joe, then it seems like it’s hard not to argue with Eli!). With the body of evidence Eli has presented, along with the additional sentimental fact that the Shutdown is about to celebrate a birthday, I just can’t come to any other conclusion. So just sit back, turn on, tune in, and just concede the facts: April is, indeed, “Eli Black Month.”

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

wrestlebard1 Comment

Thanks for the kind messages asking about my well-being. I’m well, just crazy busy, thus scant posts lately. I have several exciting upcoming posts with some exclusive content to share. Well into April, and I have yet to put the crown of homoerotic wrestler of the month on a new hunk. Let’s take care of that right now!

I’m nominating both Jimmy Clay and Tyler Ford from Can-Am’s Pro Sex Fight 7 as finalists this month, as well as Tyler St. James and Jobe Zander for Decrotchery 3.  Rock Hard Wrestling also put up some excellent contenders in March, including Ethan Andrews getting revenge on muscle stud Jake Jenkins, and Max Powers controlling long, lovely Chris Cox.  Thunder’s Arena’s Angel gets another nomination for breaking in the muscle mass of bodybuilder Python (a rookie I’m also happy to nominate) in Battlespace 26. Thunder’s also floods the field with team Raging Cherries (Big Sexy, Dominic and Cameron Mathews) and team 2.5 Men (Z-Man, Lex and Marty Party) in their 6-man tag team match called Battlespace 27. I’m also giving a nod to Thunder’s Dominic and a second glance at Python for their brief face off in Battlespace 28. And from Battlespace 29, I’m liking the look (and particularly that hairy chest, of guido extraordinaire, Enzo.

Even without BG East boys in the mix, this is a delightful field to choose from. I’ve gone back and forth about this for some time, torn between two lovers (so to speak). Just when I think I’ve come to a conclusive decision, I waver, and think for sure the other finalist is my man. It’s nearly the second tie for the title since I started the homoerotic wrestler of the month title. But not quite. By a hair’s breadth, I’m selecting a veteran whose allure has been swelling steadily as his wrestling resume grows, just barely beating out a pornboy rookie whose attitude rocked me hard this month. I’m putting this in writing now before I change my mind, once again!  My new homoerotic wrestler of the month is…

6’2″, 175 pounds Chris Cox
…Rock Hard Wrestling’s Chris Cox.

AKA Christian Taylor to BG East fans, Chris rocked it against one of the big muscle studs at Rock Hard last month. His match against Max Powers ticks all my boxes. So far, Rock Hard is the only company that’s put 6’2″ Chris in a pro wrestling ring, which is the setting that tends to stroke me hardest. His long, tall frame looks fantastic towering over (and occasionally in) the ropes. When Chris quickly tosses that big muscle man into the corner to take advantage of the turnbuckle to pound his gut, I can’t help but think that this is, unquestionably, Chris’ most natural habitat.

There’s just so much to be done with such a long, lean body like this! Chris is always cool under pressure. He looks like he’s playing a chess match, seriously contemplating 5 moves ahead of where he is at any moment. He wrestles with sexy savvy, every posture and angle communicating confidence learned from being a graduate of the school of hard knocks. But there’s also something delightfully arousing about a sexy, smart thinker getting caught and tortured by a big, bulging musclehead! Chris looks like he’s on the brink of snapping in half in big muscle bearhugs and Boston crabs.

I love it when a 6’2″ lean machine like Chris refers to his opponent as “big boy!” He uses his nominal height advantage beautifully, stretching Max out vulnerably (and gorgeously) in a full nelson.  And when he starts wrapping his lovely, long limbs around Max, all that luscious length is picture perfect. Softening him up, once Chris slides his sweaty legs into position to lock a figure-4 choke across his throat, all those muscles on Max are just tasty, tasty window dressing.
True enough, Chris will always have an added advantage for my affections thanks to knowing that he’s got Skip Vance (aka Jeff Hollister) off camera ready to nurse his wounds. Personally, I’d pop my cork to see Chris taking it hard on his own, only to have Skip/Jeff dive under the ropes and leap onto big Max’s back in a rear choke, giving his handsome boyfriend the breather he needs to come back and get some revenge for being bullied in the ropes.
And I just have to say that Chris brings the sexy to this match, notwithstanding Max’s big fitness model body. Chris sells a story, whether suffering or dishing it out. And it’s just impossible to miss the fact that Mr. Cox sprouts signs of life even in the more “implicit” setting of the Rock Hard ring. And when he’s flat on his back and out cold, bulging in all the right place, the missed opportunity of having his boyfriend rush to his side, cradle his head in his lap, and kiss him back to consciousness like Prince Charming, is nothing that my imagination can’t easily correct.

Hot damn, Chris Cox!  That’s one accomplished homoerotic wrestler who’s steadily selling sexier and sexier wrestling entertainment the longer he’s in the business. It’s no wonder this latest installment of his work is hot as hell and entirely worthy of the laurel leaves and the title of my homoerotic wrestler of the month!