Damien Rush – Page 2 – Sidelineland

The Best Muscle Money Can Buy

October 21, 2016 wrestlebardLeave a comment

So I’ve been biting my tongue about the 2nd three-way match in BG East’s recent Three-Way Thrash 4 release (there sure are a lot of numbers in this sentence). On the one hand, I think I’d like Alex and Joe’s reviews to percolate a while. There can be a pile-on effect when we’re all reviewing the same match at the same time, and sometimes the uniqueness of three different sets of eyes gets blurred in the sum total all at once. On the other hand, this match stars three wrestlers who I’m never at a loss for words about.

So fuck it. I’m on the case. First of all, can someone start a GoFundMe page for Ty and Drake to get a room? Because they are back at it again, tearing the fuck into each other in that way that only the best of friends and/or jilted lovers can. I’m a little bitter that Three-Way Thrash 4 starts with the toy boys already mid-match. While I understand that we’ve already seen them rip each other apart on the mat, and then battle to a double cum explosion in a bed, I’m still irritated at catching the boys in the ring already in progress. It irritates me on one level because I can tend toward the OCD side of things, and half-started or unfinished business festers under my skin. It also irritates me because I want to know the story of how two of my favorite jobbers yet again got geared up and on a terror brutalizing each other once again. Didn’t they settle that shit in Babyface Brawl X? You know, Drake won on the mat, which had to be such in intense relief and shock for the Cheshire Cat. On the other hand, I’ve seen Ty talking shit about claiming victory in the final tally, because Drake came first. So, yeah, I could see how this whole jobber rivalry could easily have erupted once again. And between you and me, I think they’re probably secretly gagging to fuck each other senseless.

Consult the match description for the official backstory. Whatever the case, I’m already turned on with just the 2 minutes or so we get to see of their back and forth punishment. Drake rides some momentum, that shit eating grin stretched across his handsome face as he crushes hard on face-to-crotch headscissors on the Trophy Boy. He’s all triumph and gloating, with that unfamiliar feeling of being in control settling in. Watching him pitching, it makes me want to just reach out and pat him on the head, it’s so adorable. But then, of course, Ty claws the fuck out of his balls and starts to beat his way back into a revenge bruising.

Someone’s getting face fucked before this is all said and done.

Now, I love me some Damien Rush. I especially love him massively muscled and hairy, like he is when he strolls in and interrupts my boybanders beating the shit out of each other. I love Damien’s thick, meaty thighs as the muscle bounces and quivers, and that sweet, round ass packed so deliciously into leopard print trunks. I’ll typically stand up and cheer when daddy’s favorite little richboy strips down and stomps onto the scene. But fuck, what about the boybander grudge match!?

We will likely never know, damn it, because Damien climbs on board and takes total control of the scene. I’m totally on board with both Alex and Joe when both of them (all three of us independently of one another) bemoaned the lost opportunities of this instantly turning into a 1 on 2 squash. I’d go so far as to argue it defies the Three-Way Thrash genre a bit, because other than seeing those fleeting seconds of Drake and Ty barreling into one another before Damien arrived, the drama is entirely about daddy’s little rich boy running rough shod over the tasty jobbers. In my homoerotic geography classes, we always learned that was something other than a “3-way” battle.

But like Alex, I enjoy the Damien Rush show for what it is. He’s fucking impressive, and I would not always have counted on Damien being able to control pace and be entirely in the driver’s seat telling a story like this. He’s come a long way, and that includes his massive muscular development as well as his growing capacity to work offense, transition from hold to hold, and ride a wave of momentum all the way to me pounding one out right around the time that he’s simulating face fucking both Drake and Ty simultaneously, because he’s just that fucking big and bad.

Ty takes the coitus interruptus the hardest, because he was the one on top when Damien barged in. So there’s something particularly poignant about Ty’s debasing destruction. Maybe, just maybe, he could have settled the score and made Drake his bitch once and for all (of course, he’d have to time share him with me and the dozen or so other guys who’ve owned him in the ring). But the boy band intramural battle is swatted away with one massive, blue blood back hand from Damien. So when Ty is draped over the top rope and spanked way, way hard, those aren’t just tears dripping off Ty’s face. Those are dreams of revenge getting washed away.

Alex and Joe both point out that Drake seems like little more than a deer in the headlights in this thrashing. I can see it, of course. He’s flat on his back (again!?) and trying to recover from Ty’s schoolboy cock pin before he even realizes Damien has climbed into the ring and opened up a can of whoop ass on them both. The scene is dripping with pathos when the Cheshire Cat repeatedly tries to slink away, crawling on all fours, dragging his hot carcass across the mat and trying to beat a hasty retreat from the ring room entirely on those occasions when Damien is paying full attention to Ty. The sheer terror as Drake tries to run away like a coward might make someone crasser than I am call him a pussy then and there, but then again, he happily embraces the moniker of the Cheshire Cat of Homoerotic Wrestling.

But as much as I enjoy my boy banders, this is, indeed, Damien’s story. And he tells it well. His two-fer bearhug, pulling both jobber studs off their feet in one huge, massively muscled, bulging bicep bearhug is, no shit, fucking impressive. At times in Damien’s past I’ve sensed he’s trying to run away from the legacy of being born with a silver spoon in his mouth, mixing it up in pro wrestling as a way of balancing out the emasculating side-effect of living without consequences or accountability and turning into a whining bitch daddy’s boy. So I sit up and take notice when suddenly Damien starts crowing, calling himself “the best muscle money can buy.” Rumors have been around all along that he’s got a personal trainer and a private pro wrestling coach to propel his career to the heights that all of daddy’s riches can manage, and I for one sort of love Damien a little more for finally owning it and throwing it in his victims’ faces. And whatever the fuck his personal trainer is doing, I say keep fucking doing it, because Damien is gorgeous! He refers to himself as “the new and improved Damien Rush. Better, bigger, stronger, more animal than man.” I say if you’ve grown up a bored little rich boy with a sadomasochistic fascination with pro wrestling, there is no better evidence than Damien Rush that you should NOT run for president. You should write that highrise-size check and get yourself the best hairy, hunky, bulging, beefy, proportional, balanced, beautiful brawn that your daddy’s checkbook can buy.

Ty and Drake do not enjoy this match nearly enough for my taste, mind you. Getting pec smothered in Damien’s hairy chest absolutely deserves some Trophy Boy and Chesire Cat erections, as far as I’m concerned. I know, I know, they were terrified, which I’m sure is a buzz kill for some. But the more sweaty sheen Damien works up underneath his furry coat, and the more humiliation he heaps onto the doomed duo, the more I just wish for my boys to be unable to restrain themselves from pulling out their cocks and truly paying homage to the best muscle money can buy.

And, sure, like both Alex and Joe, I’m a little bitter that my boy banders were completely and utterly impotent in the wrestling drama. They do not lay a hand on Damien. They suffer like only two of the top jobbers on the scene can suffer. They make me laugh. They tug at my heart strings. They make me enormously hard. But this would all have been a Mars shot of a match if only they’d been able to pull together, say, 4 minutes of richboy beatdown here and there. Knowing how seriously dangerous both of them are, it actually stretches plausibility for me to the extreme to believe that they didn’t pull off some tandem muscle hunting take downs, even if only to be upended.

But then Damien stacks the boys like cordwood, on top of each other, unconscious, involuntarily 69-ing each other, and he sits down on Drake’s back and slaps the Cheshire Cat’s already beet red ass. “I know how much you both like this position,” Damien smirks, flexing for the mirror, bordering on a homophobic bully tact that would piss me off if he kept it up. But, no, we all know that Drake and Ty play for our team. And we know that, based on the raging feud they’ve been nursing for a couple of years now, neither one of them would have been satisfied when they climbed into the ring together unless someone wasn’t sucking someone else’s cock before all was said and done. Instead, Damien slapped them both down into Loserville and, simultaneously, made them both winners with their rival’s face shoved helplessly into their crotches. And Damien flexes those HUGE arms one more time and smirks. And despite myself, kicking myself for crushing on another squash match, all is forgiven.

I will adamantly insist, however, that this was a waste of Ty and Drake, even if it was a sensational push for daddy’s little rich boy. Sexy as fuck? Undeniably. Left me covered in sweat and cum? Absolutely. But even 50% of the hotness it could have been? Not even.

Just me. Destroying you.

September 9, 2016September 9, 2016 wrestlebard3 Comments

Wrester4Hire has made a new batch of matches available for members to view, so I sat down to take a look at Alex Oliver (aka Gus Rowe via BGE) and Damien Rush (MDW, BGE) in Knocked Out. The two hunks also square off in a publicly available match for sale on W4H, but Knocked Out is an erotic horror fantasy all its own.

If I’d known the plot of this clip ahead of time, honestly, I probably wouldn’t have watched it. It’s a torture flick, nearly a snuff film, really, as “psychopath” Damien kidnaps gorgeous Alex from his very own car and deposits him in the middle of a wrestling ring for 20 minutes of total terror. That’s the story arc, really. As a fan of competitive matches and relatively few “gimmicks,” this match seems like it isn’t in my wheelhouse. And yet, holy fuck, I was turned on and breathless nearly from start to finish. Who knew!?

A homoerotic wrestling sadist rips another hunk from the real world.

One element that cranks my engine from the get go is something I’ve talked about a couple of times recently. Even in the car, Alex is in street clothes while his kidnapper is geared up in a black wrestling singlet. The focus on clothing at the start somehow massages me right below the balls just right. Alex looks like every frat boy on the planet, out cold on his back in the middle of the ring in jeans and an Abercrombie t-shirt. When Damien sets up his office (a brief case full of chloroform, chains, sparring gloves, and duct tape), the contrast between homoerotic fantasy heel Damien and vulnerable, ripped from the Real World Alex is lush.

Equally titillating is the moment that Damien gets down to business unbuckling the unconscious stud’s belt. He violently rips apart Alex’ jeans, quite literally ripping them off his sweet body. “Oooooo,” Damien coos with unmistakable lust, “looks like you’re nice and prepped.” Alex’ long, thick, smooth legs and ultra low rise designer briefs are apparently all the prep that Damien could hope for in a victim.

“Ooooo, looks like you’re nice and prepped!”

“Where the fuck am I?!” Alex mutters in a panic as he starts to come to. “You’re in my house,” Damien answers coldly. “Time to wake up. Nap time is over. Fun time is just beginning.” He pries the nearly naked hunk backward into a dragon sleeper, even as Alex gasps in horror, “Oh, GOD!”

“What did I do to you!?” the captured stud cries with a note of pleading in his voice. And here’s where the genre of the match comes into clearest focus. Damien replies, “You didn’t do anything to me. But I’m going to do a lot to you.” Think Saw. Think Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. This is a random act of horror. “You fucking psychopath!!!” Alex screams, again with just a note of horror, as if appealing to a shred of humanity left in the monstrous heart of his attacker. There is no shred. When Alex frantically slaps the mat while Damien gags him with his own belt, wrenching his neck backward, Damien chuckles. “What are you doing? Tapping!?” He rolls his eyes with contempt. “This isn’t a fight. This is just me destroying you.”

Headscissors, hairy pecs, and a chloroform chaser.

Although Knocked Out is considerably more a domination fantasy than a wrestling match, Damien’s use of wrestling holds and the ring ropes to torture his prey are just enough to stroke my kink. Full nelsons, sleepers, abdominal claws and grapevines bury deep into Alex panicked psyche. For no good reason other than terror, Damien grinds the toe of his boot into his nearly defenseless victim. When Alex tries to fight his attacker away with a flailing fist, Damien grabs the arm and pounds the wrist across his knee, threatening to break it in order to force the fratboy not to interfere with Damien’s “work.”

By far the climax of this match (well, I climaxed. Twice. And that’s just on the first viewing), is when Damien duct tapes Alex’ wrists to the ring ropes as the fratboy sits dazed in the corner. When the captured stud tries to use his only free appendages to defend himself, Damien then duct tapes his right ankle to the ropes, and then cranks open spread eagled Alex’ fabulous legs and uses the kid’s own belt to truss up his left ankle to the rope. Damien takes a step back to admire his handiwork. “Look at that!” Damien says almost breathlessly, brimming with admiration. “That is just… SO… beautiful!,” the psychopath gushes, reading my mind. Again, I say, I am shocked at how completely turned on these guys make me without an ounce of competitive narrative. I just keep gasping in awe at how sensationally hot Alex’ gorgeous body is carved up and served raw. I haven’t had this much empathy for a psychopath since Dexter went off the air.

There’s one glaring missed opportunity in Knocked Out that has me shouting at the screen by the end. While I find the repeated use of chloroform redundant (I lose count around 6 times it’s put to use on the fratboy), the real misstep here is how precious little we see of Alex’ magnificent ass. I mentioned how much that ass grabbed my attention when he debuted with BG East, and the glimpses we do get of it in Knocked Out confirm the prime real estate that his mouthwatering cheeks are. I recently announced that I thought Cal Bennett had one of the most fuckable asses in the business, and I’m saying here and now that I think Alex’ glutes belong right up there at that same level. And while I am dizzied by his thick quads and lickable six-pack, I’m slightly embittered by how little camera time there is for Alex’ amazing ass.

Not to say that there’s a lack of attention paid to Alex’ ass. I think the second most evocative moment in the match comes right near the end when Damien has him in a reverse bearhug. Again, we get a great view of the fratboy’s gorgeous frontside, but, come on! A standard bearhug would have shown off that ass so sensationally! But still, it’s not like Damien’s overlooking the goods. When an exhausted Alex bends forward over his tormentors fists locked across his lower abdomen, Damien growls, “Right where I like it!” Several pelvic thrusts, pounding his crotch into the fratboy’s epic cheeks connects all the dots here.

Lest I neglect all of the most important parts, let me state the obvious when I say that Damien is a hot, hairy, fantasy heel. The contrast of his hairy muscles against Alex’ baby smooth body is yet another unmatched pairing that works sensationally for me. I have to admit that I think few muscle hunks suffer as desperately and provocatively as Damien does when he’s on the receiving end, but he does a great job as the maniacal tormentor in total control here.

So, although I’ve mentioned often how qualified is my enjoyment of an occasional squash, and how I’ve tried to parse apart the genres of domination kink and wrestling kink, despite myself, I loved Knocked Out. I’m looking forward to seeing more of Alex Oliver, preferably from behind. I’d love to see more of this ripped-from-real-life-and-dropped-into-the-homoerotic-wrestling-universe scenario, and next time let’s see the involuntary hunk wrestle in street clothes just a little bit, driving home this great real life/fantasy tension. But in the mean time, I’m going back to enjoy Knocked Out more before it’s pulled off of the W4H member video rotation!

A Year in the Life

December 30, 2015December 29, 2015 wrestlebard1 Comment

With 2015 coming to a close, it’s time to reminisce. I published 100 posts this year, and readers added up an astonishing 493,000 page views in 2015. Most readers (by far) find their way to the home page of neverland, tracking the most recently published posts from day to day. Fascinatingly, the second most viewed page was the About neverland page, which sort of warms my heart because it’s text intensive (so you weren’t just chasing pics) and, well, all about me and my philosophy of blogging. By far the most popular pic clicked on this year was of hot, hairy chested Damien Rush crunching out a most-muscular pose with his masked undoing hovering ominously in the background.

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h52m35s222 — Damien’s most muscular grabbed readers most.

Readers also clicked most on my review of the Gazebo Grapplers 17 match pitting jungle boy Lorenzo Lowe against hot jobber Tim Messina. You also seemed to be as infatuated with the pulse pounding 2015 debut of big, bulging, beautiful, blond, blue-eyed beefcake Biff Farrell, clicking directly through to my adoring review of his introduction to the homoerotic wrestling audience in Lon Dumont’s Wrestler Spotlight DVD. Of course, these stats are systematically biased toward older posts (you’ve had less time to rack up clicks on December posts, for example). Which makes me think that my September review of Hunkbash 15, although only the 3rd most viewed blog post of the year, may actually turn out to be the hotttest click over time. And I can certainly understand why. I’ve nearly worn out my DVD of Logan Vaughn’s divine, titanic thighs squeezing every ounce of resistance out of every inch of supplicant-in-training Trey Dixon. There are tastes du jour and then there are exquisite, timeless dishes that we’ll be savoring for years to come, and I have to believe that Trey crushed into sweaty, slack jawed worship at the bare feet of Logan is going to be a keeper.

Neverland readers originate from across the globe. English-speaking United States, the United Kingdom, and Canada are, in order, the top ranking origins of the most readers. Germany comes in fourth place with over 13,000 page views, edging out Australia. France, Japan and Mexico round out the top 8 countries of origin of homoerotic wrestling fans checking out the latest here at neverland.

Click-throughs reveal what I’d expect. I spend most of my time reviewing BG East products, so little wonder that over 14,000 of the click-throughs this year were of readers checking out the source material at BGE. Most of the other click throughs were to brother bloggers like Wrestling Arsenal, Inner Jobber, Beefcakes of Wrestling, and Ringside at Skull Island. I do have love for more than BG East, of course, so I’m glad to see there were over 2,500 click throughs checking out source material at Can-Am, over 2,500 to Cameron Matthews‘ site, and over 1,800 to Muscle Domination Wrestling.

david2 — The moment I get my hands on (a pic of) David Muir shirtless, you will be the first to know!

Those of you using search engines to find your way to these pages typically know what you’re looking for, most of the time using keywords “sidelineland” or “neverland wrestling.” Fascinating me to no end, the next most common search engine keyword earning a click to neverland is “David Muir shirtless.” Google it, and sure enough, neverland is ranked #1. Again, consider my heart strangely warmed by the newsboy love that clearly many of you share with me. Those of you searching for a particular wrestling crush sending you this way were most likely to be seeking out Lane Hartley or Lon Dumont.

gio — Favorite moment #5: Gio plays for our team!

As for my favorite moments of 2015, one of the most fabulous reveals that I celebrated on the pages of this blog was my current top newsboy crush, Gio Benitez, coming out to his adoring public via Instagram photos of sunning his magnificent muscles next to his then-boyfriend Tommy DiDario. When he then documented his Paris marriage proposal via social media, getting down on one knee (Tommy said yes, of course!), a newsboy homoerotic wrestling lover champion tag team was born in my imagination. Every time I see Gio’s gargantuan biceps straining the seams of his suit coats as he reports on GMA, I no longer need to imagine what those hot, bulging muscles look like shirtless, thanks to Gio sharing the wealth and proudly showing off his, and his fiancee’s fabulous muscles in 2015. I’m still waiting for my wedding invitation.

One of those little moments that probably blew right past most readers but tickled my crotch just right this year was a snarky little exchange I had with none other than BG East Boss himself, Kid Leopard back in February. In my relentless pouring over and critiquing the nominees for BG East’s 2014 Bestie Awards, I adamantly announced that Kirk Donahue did not deserve to be in the running for Best Ass. You know what a smart ass I am, so of course I poured it on thick, speculating that the eventual winner of the category ought to bend Kirk over his knee and spank that adorable, yet not outstanding ass until he confesses who he fucked to get the nomination. Well, my smart assedness earned me a firm, slighty chiding message from Kid Leopard, who I assume is nominator in chief, explaining that I was completely off base in my disregard of Kirk’s award worthy butt. Getting a virtual slap on the wrist from the Boss both tickled and aroused me so much that I promptly published a public service announcement clarifying that, with additional persuasive evidence offered by the Boss, Kirk’s ass is totally nominatible. Of course, I was still a smart ass. And I still say Kirk’s ass is sensationally fuckable, but nowhere near deserving of a top 5 ranking in the exceedingly hot field of BG East butts. But anytime Kid Leopard calls me into his office to slap me around a bit, it’s going to be on my list of favorite moments.

character_study_joe_lally_014_1 — Aussie fashion model Jarrod Scott inspired my homoerotic wrestling imagination this year.

My third favorite moment of 2015 was a little self-generated pride and joy I felt in getting my ass back to what really started neverland in the first place: writing homoerotic wrestling fiction. In August I took the flimsy excuse of Details Magazine identifying their top 31 male models, to write up a first round of homoerotic pretty boy wrestling fiction. I have yet to complete the tournament, though Sean O’Pry, John Halls, and Jarrod Scott more than ably earned their way into the semi-finals. What may not have been as apparent on your side of the screen was the pleasure I had in getting back to exercising my homoerotic wrestling imagination. I’ve gotten back to the keyboard several times this fall, and I anticipate 2016 getting me back to the online homoerotic wrestling fiction publishing business again. I’ll keep you updated.

12202024_1728558944044918_825688879_n — Super sexy Drake “Blogger Bait” Marcos, Ty Alexander, and Kayden Keller.

My second most favorite moment in blogging this year was the feast of homoerotic wrestler Halloween costumes I got to enjoy, and share, in early November. Ty Alexander, Kayden Keller and Drake “Don’t-Call-Me-Jobber” Marcos partied hearty on Halloween this year and gifted you and me some hot shots of their sensationally sexy superhero costumes. By way of introducing himself to me, and by extension, you, adorably hot red-headed rookie twink Charlie Evans also sent some shots my way of his Iceman costume for Halloween this year. As soon as homoerotic wrestling studs send me unsolicited (or at least, lightly solicited) photos of themselves roaming the real world, I’m aroused and the moment is indelibly etched onto the list of most memorable moments.

0106_lg — Man-of-my-dreams Scott Williams

My top, very most favorite moment in blogging for 2015 took place in the comments section. Casual readers may not think to check the comments, but you do so at the risk of missing hot gems every so often. Such was the case when I posted one of my long, adoring, full throttle fanboy infatuation pieces on my long-time homoerotic wrestler crush, Scott Williams. Scott shared his appreciation that his fans are still gagging for it, assuring us that he is “still keeping in shape and wrestling privately here in Boston and when I travel…always will love it and will always make you proud on the mats or in the ring!” He signed his comment “Sending bearhugs – Scott Williams.” I have since seen glimpses and snippets of evidence (follow the likes of Ty Alexander on FB, and you’ll see what I mean) that Scott is, indeed, still climbing into the ring, and he remains incredibly, profoundly, astonishingly sexy fit still today. I think it’s a crime against homoerotic wrestling fandom that Scott is keeping his wrestling work out of the publicly consumable sphere these days, and I think you should, at this very moment, send an email to BG East pleading with them to convince this classic hunk to cum out in a new release in 2016. In the meantime, that virtual bearhug from one of my longest running wrestling crushes still keeps me warm at night.

0213_lg — Scott takes full possession of favorite moment #1.

So, 2016. I’m hoping it’s a year for getting back to what has been the most fun for me over the past 6 years. Be it resolved that I will publish homoerotic wrestling fiction in the coming year. Be it also resolved that I will snag some fresh new wrestler interviews, because the lack of interviews in 2015 was, in retrospect, tragic from my perspective. I’ve also been not-so-subtly angling for an opportunity to be your Every-Joe-Fan at an honest-to-the-homoerotic-wrestling-gods taping of a match, and I see no reason why 2016 shouldn’t be the year that that invitation doesn’t show up in my mailbox. Those are a few of my hopes and dreams for the New Year. Hope yours is hot, sweaty, and includes some OTK backbreakers.

Tug on Superman’s Cape

December 23, 2015 wrestlebard1 Comment

Damien Rush has never been less able to squeeze his bulging muscles inside this suit!

“Riddle me this, Super Stud: what is black and green and in your gut?” Simple, naive, gullible as shit Super Stud is stumped. He looks inward, trying to solve the riddle. Riddle Man relieves the suspense by driving his black and green walking stick viciously into the super hero’s rippled abs.

How in the fuck could adorable, skinny little red-headed rookie ~~Charlie Evans~~ Riddle Man possibly execute a salacious squash all over incredibly built, bigger and bigger every time we see him, ~~Damien Rush~~ Super Stud? A kryptonite plated walking stick, kiddies. That’s what levels the playing field, or, more accurately, levels the luscious man of steel, Super Stud.

Damien’s is big, but Charlie’s stick is bigger!

Muscle Domination Wrestling’s Super Men 4.4 is a perfect stocking stuffer for the homoerotic wrestling fan with a twink’s revenge fantasy deep inside. The contrast of skinny, snarling Charlie and magnificently muscled Damien is an enticing hook. Charlie’s green and orange tights hang loosely off his thin frame. This was also Bryce’s costume as Aqua Bryce, but I’m suspecting the Mastodon may have been the last MDW wrestler to squeeze is massive muscles into those tights before tossing them over to the lightweight rookie, because the ass sags halfway to Charlie’s knees without the prominent shelf and shapely glutes of the bigger boys at MDW to fill it out. In contrast, that same Super Stud suit we’ve seen Damien wear on multiple occasions has never fit tighter, never sucked into every crevice and stretch across so many mountainous bulges as it does in 4.4. Literally, Damien can no longer zip the lycra suit up all the way because his gargantuan shoulders and huge pecs can no longer be contained! There’s something extravagant and overcompensating about the suction packed super suit that makes the drapes and pleats of Charlie’s sagging tights seem somehow hungrier, more dangerous, more ripe with arousing potential for the brainiac high school nerd to get sweet, sweet satisfaction from the suffering letterman.

I’m sure I’m simply a sick puppy for getting turned on by the scene in Rob Zombie’s Halloween when the kid version of Michael Myers gets revenge for getting bullied at school by ambushing his bigger tormentor in the woods and beating the shit out of him (literally) with a tree branch. Yeah, that’s just fucked up, I realize, but I’m just being honest. I took my fair share of bullying torment as a skinny academic all star, so I’m sure it says everything about me that I’ve got a hair trigger for the twink’s revenge narrative in 4.4.

But unlike Michael Myers, Charlie Evans has more on his mind than homicidal brutality. He mercilessly taunts the bulging super hero as he pounds his kryptonited cane into Damien’s very prominent pouch. “I don’t think your super crotch here has seen enough action,” Charlie gloats. Not nearly satisfied enough, he dives in and wraps the fingers of his right hand around Damien’s mountainous crotch, squeezing, manipulating, crushing the nearly comically virile hunk into a writhing, impotent pile of meat.

Charlie lords it over his magnificently muscled prey.

Like the vicious twink avatar he is, Charlie doesn’t just drive home the blunt end of his walking stick, he drives him the utter humiliation that all those gorgeous, lovingly sculpted muscles are completely useless. The jock’s pride and joy, his never fail cocktease physique is laid to ruin by a lightweight 4 inches shorter and, according to their wrestler profiles, 70 pounds lighter.

Things to come, Super Stud. Things to come.

Things really start to turn sexy when Charlie pounds the end of his walking stick into Damien’s fabulously meaty glutes. “Time to soften you up before I get a little touchy-feely. I don’t know which is more fun,” Charlie chuckles. “Your front, or your back.” As I’m screaming at the screen “his ASS!!!” Charlie rolls the writhing hunk to his stomach and digs his fingertips into those meaty, shrink wrapped glutes. “I can work with this, I think,” Charlie says appreciatively. “This will be a lot of fun to play with!” He grabs both cheeks and shakes the meat enthusiastically. “I’m going to have a blast back here!” he promises.

“This will be a lot of fun to play with!”

“You might look pretty bad, but you feel pretty nice!” Charlie coos, getting good and handsy feeling up Damien’s sweetly suffering muscles. “You’re going to be my slave!” the twink on a rampage promises.

As is the norm at MDW, this is a squash, and other than ball claws, stomping, and assault with a blunt weapon, there’s not a strong reference to professional wrestling in the narrative. It’s a domination match, through and through, and setting my imagination into overdrive for what a skinny, horny, vengeful nerd might do with a battered, conquered, and sleepered jock tormentor at his mercy, Super Men 4.4 scratches an itch for me right. “And now you’re mine to play with…”

Services Rendered

May 29, 2015 wrestlebardLeave a comment

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-12h20m49s723 — Daddy’s hot, hard, hunky little rich boy, Damien Rush.

I’m on the record many times over as a big fan of hot and hairy Damien Rush. It seems like he’s tried to shed the ignominy of being daddy’s little rich boy, but personally, that back story makes it that much more captivating to see him stripped to wrestling trunks and pounding that hot body of his into another man’s muscles. His return to the Muscle Domination Wrestling ring in Six Pack Bash 8 portrays him as a freelance fitness coach, thrusting his services upon Brad Barnes without waiting for an invitation.

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-11h48m33s279 — Damien lends a hand to enhance Brad’s abdominal workout.

Brad is working his abs in the ring, sporting orange very-briefs and nothing else. Damien offers to enhance the work out with some light punches to Brad’s contracted abdominals, a la Rocky. Naive, dare we say, thick Brad concedes at first. But you and I know what happens next before we even see it. “Light” punches turn harder, more vicious, until Damien is beating the crap out of the muscle hunk’s gut with two fisted chops.

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-11h51m14s041 — Damien is swimming in his own sweat, getting all hot and lathered beating the shit out of Brad Barnes.

Damien is luscious in his familiar sparkling purple trunks that manage to ride up high on his waist but not quite cover his sweet ass cheeks. Both studs are barefoot, and I love barefoot ring wrestling. It has a direct line to my adolescent self slack jawed in lust over a young Kevin Von Erich.

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-12h15m11s056 — Damien prides himself on digging in deep, stretching you out in all different directions, and then pulling out hard.

“People pay for my services in the ab conditioning world,” Damien explains, clawing the living fuck out of Brad’s gut. “Because I give it to them better and harder than anyone else.” I love it when the double entendres fly thick and fast. “I dig in deep!” Damien grunts through gritted teeth, clawing his fingers past the first knuckles into Brad’s beet red gut. “And I pull out hard!” Like instructions in a sizzling hot night of rough sex, Damien marries physical brutality with a running narrative. “And then I stretch them in all different ways!” Yeah, Damien. Dig in deep and stretch me out in all different ways, rich boy!

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-12h19m52s172 — Daddy’s little rich boy needs a blogger cornerman to towel off all of that slippery sweat!

I know I’m a broken record for pointing it out, but knowing some wrestling fans like I do, I feel obliged to warn you this is a complete, total, unequivocal squash from start to finish. There is one moment where Brad desperately slaps on a bearhug, but the look of unhurried contempt on Damien’s face makes this one of the more pitiful moments in the match for big Brad. And there are just so many moments to pity him!

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-12h47m31s676 — Rope burn as homoerotic wrestling offense?

I also don’t quite get the rope. Damien appears to exponentiate the ab torture by stretching a rope across Brad’s gut. Huh? I mean, rope burn sucks, but… I’m just not buying it as the muscle crushing maneuver it’s made out to be. Brad’s capacity to sell is sorely tested there, as it is later when he’s “trapped” in the ropes (really, just draped backward across the top rope, but seemingly paralyzed). Brad suffers non-stop through this match, but you can see his skills wearing thin right around the same points at which the plot does.

vlcsnap-2015-05-29-12h20m32s868 — Damien is ALL OVER hunky Brad.

Watching Damien work up a thick sheen of sweat, though, is never wasted time for me. Damn, this kid’s got my number. I mean, literally, I’ve been begging for an interview with Damien for years now, but I somehow never get past his personal assistant (not daddy’s little rich boy, my ass). The one-sided specialities at MDW do not serve him up nearly as movingly as Damien’s work elsewhere in the homoerotic wrestling universe. But those hairy pecs, that 5-o’clock shadow, and his sweet ass keep me tuning in, over and over.

I’d love to see both of these boys work about 10 times harder than they do (or at least sell that much more). I’m still lobbying MDW for fewer squashes and more wrestling competition drama. But this is Damien Rush and Brad Barnes and muscle domination and monologuing, so I know there’s plenty of market for Six Pack Bash 8.

And the nominees are…

February 5, 2015February 5, 2015 wrestlebard5 Comments

The link the the Best of BG East voting disappeared from the BG East homepage, but I swear I saw that you had until Sunday at midnight to cast your ballots. Hopefully, if you’re still undecided, you still have time. And hopefully I can offer this voter’s guide and my personal take on the field in a few more categories. Let’s start today taking a look at the hotly contested and highly controversial Best Body nominees. What makes for “Best Body” has got to be even more subjective than what we evaluate as best body part by body part. Me, I like all sorts of bodies, but when I think “best” I think superior fitness, muscle mass, proportion, symmetry, balance, and that most subjective of them all, beauty. Here are the contenders for Best Body at BG East in 2014.

kkbody — I’ve been explicitly campaigning for months for Kid Karisma to take the title this year, because, fuck, look! All those qualifiers I mention above as my personal criteria are summed up right here in my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler. He’s also making a play for a Best Butt 3-peat, and I’m slightly aghast that he didn’t get a nomination for Best Abs.

Chacebody — For those who like them brawnier, burlier, hairier and with tweezed eyebrows, Chace LaChance is certain to make a strong showing. Interestingly he’s not a nominee for best butt, bulge or abs, but as a total package, he got the nod to join the field.

zmanbody — Also Best Abs nominee Z-Man took the Best Body title last year, after going down to Rio Garza in 2012. I’ll say it again, Z-Man must have an aging portrait of himself in the attic somewhere, because he’s perpetually gorgeous and in top shape.

Calbody — Cal Bennett’s insurgency into the Best Abs and Best Body categories this year is ballsy and stunnning. He’s appeared in exactly 1 product thus far at BG East, but that was enough to get his liberally inked, stunning physique a nod for Best Bod. See my comments from a couple days ago about his body, honey, and my tongue.

coopbody — Goldenboy Austin Cooper (or Dr. Cooper, depending on the day) is dazzlingly beautiful, proportioned, balanced. That pretty face could possibly distract even his die hard fans from fully appreciating the top contender quality of that body. But probably not.

I haven’t been coy about saying for months Kid Karisma’s phenomenal fitness and picture perfect physique deserve the title of Best Body this year. The total package from top to bottom, front to back, in my opinion. I expect Z-Man to be making the strongest play to be at the head of this pack, possibly with Coop making a dark horse late run. If Cal pulls this out, I’m calling it a major upset and a huge bullseye painted on his finely muscled ass if he ever dares to step foot in the ring with any of his more seasoned and tested contenders.

Now let’s look at some of the match Besties. Selecting a photo to highlight a nominee’s claim to take the title for best-of-match categories is daunting. What single still frame captures a claim to make an entire match sexiest, or best on the mats? With humility, I’ve attempted to present some of what I think are the best claims for the following two categories, starting with Sexiest Match of 2014.

rookssexy — Cumming out of the gate hot and hard are Kayden Keller and Ty Alexander in their tandem debut in Raunchy Rookies 7. I think it says something significant to have a double debut be featured in the sexiest match contenders. RR7 burned it up, and win, lose or draw, I have to believe there are many more Bestie nominations heading both Kayden and Ty’s way.

drakesexy — I admit to being slightly surprised to see X-Fights 38’s Drake Marcos v LJL and not see Drake and Ty’s Babyface Brawl X in this category. Nevertheless, Drake and LJL were two of the sexiest X-fighters at BGE this year, and their 38 fight was fucking mean and nasty. They hated each other start to finish, which makes it just that much sexier to see how prominently sexual domination became the story.

militarysexy — Military Muscle 2 is another surprise entry here, as far as I’m concerned. Not because I didn’t think it was scorchingly sexy, but because it was far less sexually explicit than other matches that weren’t nominated. That said, MM2 demonstrates that a match doesn’t need to include cock-sucking in order to be blindingly sexy, and rookie Zion Brown’s gasping adoration of Kid Karisma is convincing and compelling.

painsexy — Pasion & Punishment 1 was the first time I sat up and took notice of Trey Dixon. His pairing here with Skrapper is nothing short of epic. Their confrontation is spilling over with raw, balls to the walls lust from the start, and the sexual tension makes my hard drive melt (seriously, I had to buy a new computer). I had to go back and verify that these two didn’t actually fuck on camera, because the sexual aggression is so damn explicit.

darksexy — Dark Knights 11 with Steven Ponce and Ray Dalton is clearly the choice for muscle fetish leather daddies and their stubborn boys. I’m regretting that Dark Knights 12 wasn’t the DK entry in this category, but it’s not hard to see why nominators gave Ray and Steven the nod here.

This category is a major struggle for me to settle on. My blogger v wrestler match with Drake was not nominated, and of course, other than my personal photographs of Drake’s post-match humiliation, you would be hard pressed to be able to make an informed vote our direction (though, take my word for it, it was sexy). So just looking at those that were nominated, personally, I’m completely torn between Raunchy Rookies 7, X-Fights 38, and Passion & Punishment 1. I know that there are wrestling fans out there that don’t like Skrapper, so I’m guessing Passion & Punishment may be a long shot, but at the end of the day, that’s where my vote goes. I’m also guessing it will be either Raunchy Rookies or X-Fights 38 that may be where the majority goes this time, which I will totally understand. Dark horse in this field I think is Dark Knights 11. I didn’t see a ton of buzz about it, but if the muscle fetish leather daddies snap the collars on all their boys, they’ll double their vote quickly and, potentially swing this their way.

Finally for today I’m taking a look at the Best Mat Battle nominees. This is another extremely tough slate to choose from, but you don’t pay me to dither. Wait, you don’t pay me at all! Oh well, onward and upward…

cammat — Submissions 9 with Cameron Matthews grappling with LJL has got to be a front runner in this category. Cam and LJL are major league mat tacticians, and that and about 2 gallons of sweat and some smoldering bitterness make Sub 9 insanely aggressive and the stuff that no one other than a contortionist should try.

drakemat — Passion & Punishment’s match with Drake Marcos and Mason Brooks makes a compelling argument. Two big egos enter the mat room, but one of them crawls on his belly out of the mat room having been actually tagged with a permanent marker to remind him what a consummate jobber he is. As much as I love watching Drake suffer, even I was worried at times in this match that the philosopher king Mason was going to literally break him… which makes a strong case for Best Mat Battle.

masonmat — But then the drama ensues in the Academy, as Mason is going up against himself in this category, also getting the nod for his work against Skrapper in Undagear 22. These are two of the fiercest mat boys on the books right now, and neither of them is going to concede to losing while conscious. Then again, there’s that anti-Skrapper faction out there.

damienmat — I was only slightly shocked to see Damien Rush and Joah Bindao’s Undagear 21 bout appear in this category. Shocked because I don’t think of it as cream of the crop mat work, but only slightly because Damien Rush getting schooled by a petite muscleman acrobat is always going to get attention. I loved the back and forth in this match. Lots of suspense and bruised egos.

kidmat — But if you’re jonesin’ for bruised egos, I’m guessing your choice very well may be Undagear 22’s match between Ray Naylor and Kid Karisma. Ray fucking HATES Kid K, and you get the impression he hates himself just a little for being unable to resist stroking Kid K’s luscious muscles (see my arguments for his Best Body claim). These two put the hurt on each other big time, and you know it was a special match when Kid K treats the loser to a free strip show after all is said and done.

jakemat — As long as Jake Jenkins is wrestling, I predict he will have at least one nomination in the Best Mat Battle category. He’s typically the master of the mats, but he bites off more than he can chew in Gazebo Grapplers 16, facing down big, beautiful newbie Carter Alexander. The outcome of this match is in question to the bitter end, and that end has got to be described as a stunning upset, so little wonder this shows up as a Best Mat Battle nominee.

Fuck, this is another hard choice. My vote, for what it’s worth, is going to Passion & Punishment’s Drake Marcos versus Mason Brooks. It was that match, and the 3-way interview I conducted with Mason and Drake that ultimately got the whole ball rolling to eventually find myself shutting Drake up with his trunks stuffed down his throat this past Fall. It’s also sweet drama, and watching Mason pick Drake apart, humiliate him worse and worse, strip him naked and leave his indelible mark clearly ignited a ton of fantasy’s-cum-true in me. I’m thinking the favorites in this category may be Cameron and LJL, though, possibly with Ray and Kid K being the dark horse here able deliver an upset.

If you haven’t finished your ballot yet, here’s what the Bard-approved slate of choices looks like:

Best Abs: Lon Dumont

Best Bulge: Pete Sharp

Best Butt: Kid Karisma

Best Body: Kid Karisma

Sexiest Match: Passion & Punishment 1 – Trey Dixon v Skrapper

Best Mat Battle: Passion & Punishment 1 – Drake Marcos gets owned by Mason Brooks

“Or he fucks you!”

January 15, 2015 wrestlebard7 Comments

“So you come in here all tough and shit and you think you can take on me. Do you even know who I am!?”

Cal Bennet looks on dumbly, professing not to know. Let me explain things to you Cal. This is Damien Rush. This is the muscle stud I’ve been aching to interview for years. This is the hardcore pretty boy who I’ve been begging his producers to send me a pair of his trunks. Daddy’s little rich boy with a personal trainer, a high paid NHB wrestling coach, and a live in masseur (baby where do I apply for that job!?).

damien2 — Damien is meatier and sexier than ever!

Muscle Domination Wrestling released their newest season today, and the first release that catches my attention is Damien Rush facing suddenly-everywhere Cal Bennet. Six Pack Bash 6 promises that this is Damien Rush like we’ve never seen him. No longer a naive daddy’s-little-rich-boy. Meaner. Meatier. Hungrier.

damien12 — Damien is here to grind some muscle.

“I”m going to grind you up so fucking hard you’re going to be crying,” Damien snarls at delicately featured Cal. “You’re going to be begging me to stop, and you know what? I fucking won’t.” I like Damien’s energy a lot here. He’s on offense and offensive. The running metaphor is that Cal is fresh meat and Damien is here to grind him up.

damien8 — The thong and that body make up, somewhat, for some undersell from Cal.

It seems like it’s probably a good thing that Damien is in charge and pacing this battle, because Cal looks like he’s in a little over his head. Of course he’s in over his head against a veteran like Damien, but I mean sell-wise. Cal doesn’t sell SPB6 like anything other than a hot boy with a beautiful body and a dearth of wrestling experience. As promised in the match description, however, Damien is mature, intimidating, dominating, and sugary sweet Cal can melt all he wants because Damien’s packing the heat.

damien10 — I know what I like about this position!

“Do you know what I love about this position?” Damien asks, stretching Cal’s luscious torso out in a back-breaking standing Dragon Sleeper. “You’re so open and vulnerable for me to take full, fucking, advantage!” Taking advantage sort of sums it up, really. Cal is flat footed. He stumbles over a few ham-handed attempts at banter. He struggles to look entirely like he’s struggling, but damn it all if Damien doesn’t pick up the slack and at least in a few places actually make the pretty boy hurt. When Damien slams his back down across his knee, the grunt and explosive exhalation from Cal suggests that he, indeed, got the wind knocked out of him. And it hurt. The more he struggles to sell, the more I’m getting into those moments when I think Damien actually makes him hurt. Fuck yeah, make the pretty boy hurt, Damien!

damien4 — There’s a moment when spine impacts with knee that actually hurts, thank goodness.

I’ve marveled at Cal’s body before, and instantly been assailed by several fans complaining about his artwork. Too much. Distracting. Whatever. I’ve seen shitty ink, and although I don’t think Cal’s is anywhere near the hottest, it’s fine with me. As I mentioned to one critique of Cal’s tats, I’d be more than happy to smother him in honey from top to bottom and lick him clean. In his case, the ink is neither here nor there for me.

Again as billed, Damien, on the other hand, is bigger, hairier, and… heelier than I’ve ever seen him before. His physique is bulkier than in the past, and he’s definitely not nearly as cut and polished as his saccharine sweet fitness boy opponent. But I’m turned on about 15% more by Damien’s new, rawer look. After licking the honey off of Cal, I’d like a second course of Damien covered in chocolate sauce.

The match is a little plodding, I won’t lie. Damien has to do all the heavy lifting, so I appreciate that he paces himself, and happily he milks every hold. One of the first MDW matches I’ve seen in a long time not filmed in the ring, SPB6 is set in a garage, on wrestling mats, and the camera work is intimate and up close as a result. I’m accustomed to looking up from someone’s shoulder mount ringside, so it’s nice to get to see more, and closer in this setting. The cameraman loves cock, so kudos to you buddy, whoever you are. He keeps one wrestler or another’s cock center-frame about 60% of the match, which when you think about the twists and turns and scrambles of even a deliberate and one-sided mauling like this, is pretty damn impressive. Another 20% of the time, it’s one hunk or another’s ass center-frame, so again, way to go camera guy. The final 20% is a little rough, probably a few too many attempts at close ups, lying on the mat next to the boys mid-hold, trying to hover directly overhead, zooming in, pulling out. A little nauseating at times? Sure. Intimate? Raw? Absolutely.

Damien crushes Cal, and for those half a dozen moments when Cal actually looks like he’s genuinely getting torqued and tweaked into legitimate pain, I’m sold. The rest of the time, I’m just thanking my lucky stars Cal is so damn pretty and Damien is so fucking hot, hairy, and beefy and making me feel deep down what a prick-richboy heel he’s got inside. Sadly, Damien’s promise to make Cal cry is not realized. And I am fucking disappointed in that.

damien7 — “Damien Rush is not the type of man to fuck with, or…”

“Damien Rush is not the type of man you fuck with,” Damien announces, flexing so, so finely over a choked out Cal, “or he fucks you!” I need to consult Joe about the grammar here. I think there’s a discourse analysis called for, but if Damien is saying what I think he’s saying, then let me officially announce that I’m ready to fuck with him. Whatever happens by the time we diagram his sentence, I’m going to be happy!

Double-Booked

May 18, 2014May 18, 2014 wrestlebardLeave a comment

Whoever is at the front desk in the hotel where Damien Rush and Muscle Master Kevin are staying, he’s one of us. How do I know? Because he’s apparently intentionally double-booked these two hot, hairy, pumped up studs in the same suite, both of them desperate for a (private) dip in the in suite hot tub.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h24m20s146 — Two hot studs desperate for a dip in a hot tub.

This newest season on Muscle Domination Wrestling is featuring a noticeably beefier version of Muscle Mast Kevin. He’s not as cut, but sporting a whole lot more meat on those bones, accompanied by a lumberjack beard and a felonious disdain for sharing. Or taking turns. Though I wish this scenario was settled with the two hunks agreeing to share the more than ample hot tub. Naked. Alas.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h34m58s79 — Damien’s bid to defy MMK is squashed in about 17 seconds.

Anyhow. In Zzzzzzzz 3, Damien Rush showed up for his dip in the bubbles wearing a wrestling singlet. His hairy pecs bulge out the top. His huge shoulders are mapped with pulsing veins. And he’s not having any of it when MMK tries to muscle in and intimidate pretty Damien out of his already paid for suite.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h39m01s211 — This isn’t exactly the dip in the tub that Damien had in mind.

Muscle Domination Wrestling fans know that MMK has a fuse about 2 millimeters long, so no one but a newbie will be shocked that he opens a can of whoop ass on Damien in the blink of an eye. Happily for us, MMK’s carefully channeled rage immediately lighted upon the perfect solution to this conflict: they both need to get wet together. Of course, MMK’s version of this scenario has his hands wrapped around Damien’s throat as he dunks the stud.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h50m46s104 — Wolverine all buttoned up nice and snug.

Damien is begging for mercy in less than 2 minutes, which I have to admit, is turning me on. Hairy, hunky, hot as fuck Damien is overwhelmed and ready to submit so fast, I would’ve thought I’d sort of hate the stud for caving so quickly. But the muscle torture angle of this confrontation is provoking me to a surprising degree, and MMK’s relentlessness paired with Damien’s speedy decision that he is in (quite literally) over his head captivates me.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h54m37s88 — Wet muscles? I’m in.

This is one of MDW’s genre-straddling productions that runs the risk of leaving some of its intended audience feeling frustrated. There is some wrestling, but the space outside the tub is extremely limited, and the range of combat that can happen inside a hot tub is somewhat abbreviated as well. The physicality is almost entirely devoted to choke fans, as MMK’s hands are wringing Damien’s neck non-stop. Those with a drowning fetish (not me, but I’m not judging) will also find the action inside the tub a pleasure. Looking for hot, hairy muscleboys straining and flexing? Check. But if your core fetish is a couple of hunks in a pro-wrestling ring bouncing off the ropes, flying off the corners, and scooping and slamming the fuck out of each other, this will be, at best, kink adjacent. What the match lacks in scope, however, it makes up for in intimacy. The lighting is surprisingly good for the limitations of the setting, and the camera man has got to be plastered to a wall, the view is so extremely up close.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h46m25s14 — You can almost feel the panicked breaths slipping out of Damien’s mouth, the camera is so close!

“Too intense for you?” MMK asks Damien as the gasping hunk is sputtering and choking water out of his lungs. Damien worries that MMK’s real design is to literally kill him. It’s not a snuff bit, so don’t worry (or, sorry to disappoint, however it is you take the news). Damien is still alive by the end of the 16 minute session. Unconscious, sure, but alive, as MMK flexes over top of him, water dripping of his beefy bod as he explains that everything is an object lesson, and this lesson is for anyone who dares to defy him when he makes a move to take anything (ANYTHING) that may appear to belong to someone else.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h53m09s197 — Damien bent over and taking it from the Boss.

Me? I’ve got a thing for wet musclemen. So despite Damien’s hot bod being submerged in water (and thus out of sight) for most of the session, there’s enough hot, hairy, handsome man meat on display to stroke that side of me that gets a little weak in the knees at glistening, soaked studs. What would have topped this off with a cherry would have been Damien subserviently bathing his muscle master (with or without his tongue… I’d have been okay either way). But there’s a bluntness about MDW that remains true in Zzzzzzz 3. The homoeroticism is primarily what you and I bring to the viewing, though the impulse to film two hunks having it out in a hot tub is, quite obviously, pitched our direction.

vlcsnap-2014-05-18-16h56m36s8 — Get the message?

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month

January 9, 2014 wrestlebard2 Comments

I didn’t see a lot of new releases in December, but I’ll go ahead and call out one wrestler that revved my engine hardest. I’ve made no secret that I have quite a crush on this beautiful slice of beef, but he’s just been getting sexier and sexier in every new release I see. I love his look. I enjoy his character(s). And watching him teeter between dominating power and dashed dreams is one of the hottest narratives around these days. Crossing the line between 2013 and 2014, my newest homoerotic wrestler of the month is…

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h52m35s222

…daddy’s boy Damien Rush.

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h50m37s92 — The Suit knows how to revive a battered hunk like Damien: mount his ass as get your hands on every inch of his hot bod!

I wouldn’t say his new release for MDW, Super Men 1.4 is his sexiest, but it certainly plays to his strengths. Damien is the unlucky son of a bitch who inherited the title of Super Stud when the original Super Stud retired to go full time in the world of corporate intrigue. Villainy has corrupted the smooth transition from one virtuous superhero to the other, however, and the original Super Stud has been transformed into the height of unstoppable villainy, Super Heel. Super Heel (played by Muscle Master Kevin) has been snuffing out would-be heroes (and all together innocent bystanders) one by one, slowly building toward the climax of meeting his protege, Damien’s Super Stud, in a fight to the death. Damien was saved from near destruction in the last chapter of this series by the mysterious “Suit,” who revives and reinvigorates Damien’s battered super body in the only proper manner: maximum physical touch. I hear ya, Suit.

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h52m06s17 — Beauty and power

Once massaging and stroking Damien’s hot bod has brought the beautiful stud back to full strength, Suit convinces Damien that the only chance he will have to defeat the overwhelming power of Super Heel is to beat him at his own game, namely taking a performance-enhancing elixir that will challenge the virtuous Damien to hold onto his bearings on right and wrong. With that and the promise to double team Super Heel, Damien eats of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and finds himself at 200% of full strength. Shirtless, he flexes his hot muscles, and I’m reminded all over again what instantly attracts me to Damien. He has a classically beautiful body. He’s sweetly proportioned. He sports an impeccably groomed hairy chest. His shoulders are insanely wide, and his lips are screaming out for someone to suck every super sexy ounce out of this handsome hero.

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h55m29s216 — Damien’s face is buried in Muscle Master Kevin’s armpit.

Suit abandons Damien in the ring when it’s clear that Super Heel Kevin will easily destroy them both. This is a squash to end all squashes, and I don’t think that stars in squashes typically get the HWOTM nod from me. That simply points to just how hard Damien moves me, as Super Heel effortlessly manhandles Damien’s tasty bod. The cape pisses me off, because it too often obscures a clear view of Damien’s sweet ass, squeezed so earnestly inside that shiny, breathtakingly tight super suit. But for so little visible skin, the latex and lycra leaves little to the imagination, and I’m entranced by watching Damien suffer like the studly, astonished, can’t-believe-I’m-being-owned corrupted Super Stud he is.

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h56m40s159 — Super Stud cannot fathom how all of his virtue and strength is being so effortlessly obliterated.

Super Heel has Damien’s life in his hands from start to finish. He plays with his outmatched imitation. He delivers that non-stop villainous, dominating, humiliating, taunting monologue that MDW specializes in. It’s too easy for Kevin for him to be the character that moves me in this match. But Damien sells his suffering in a way that grabs me by my balls. Damien pleads and begs. He weeps and wails. All of that beautiful, powerful physique he sports is wasted and crushed. He’s terrorized and in agony. He’s pristinely vulnerable in a way that a hot, horny, handsome young hunk like Damien should never expect to be. And that’s the sexiest part of all: dashed expectations, crushed dreams, power and beauty pounded into oblivion.

vlcsnap-2014-01-09-09h56m27s61 — Super Stud II may be toast, but Damien Rush continues to fight another day as my reigning Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month!

Damien rocks me hard, and in December, he rocked me hardest. His character may be snuffed out like so many would-be heroes before him, but he lives on the hearts and minds of those of us who could never get enough of that hot, sculpted ass encased in lycra. Super Stud II may be dead, but Damien Rush lives on as my reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month.

Good (and a Little Evil) vs Evil: The Finale

December 27, 2013December 26, 2013 wrestlebardLeave a comment

Muscle Domination Wrestling has recently released season 7, and there are some great surprises there. One of the biggest surprises for me was seeing big, beautiful Braden Charron in what appears to be a squash glove fetish match. I haven’t seen it yet, but I was unable to resist getting my eyes on the climactic season finale of the Super Men saga. Muscle Master Kevin and Damien Rush starring in a superhero ring match!? I’m there.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-13h29m13s105 — Damien Rush as Super Stud II gets his hot body worked over to reinvigorate him for one last shot at defeating Super Heel.

For those who have not watched the entire series, this finale is the culmination of intrigues piled upon intrigues, betrayals and corruption, and one incredibly hot superhero after another getting conquered and crushed by the original Super-Stud-turned-evil, Super Heel. The mysterious time traveling hunk in a mask and a black bodysuit, The Suit, got more than he bargained for when he tricked Super Stud into drinking Alpha Male juice. So Suit rescues hunky Super Stud II, Damien Rush, peels him out of his super suit (hell, yes), and begins giving him a full body massage to rejuvenate the battered hero for another go at his nemesis.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-13h34m41s70 — The Suit cannot keep his hands off of Super Stud’s pumped muscles!

He gives Damien’s sweet ass particularly loving attention with a deep muscle massage that leaves Damien groaning and soaking up Suit’s promise to give him the strength and the ally he needs to beat the evil Super Heel once and for all. He gives Super Stud II his newest, most potent “serum,” so-called “heel juice” which Damien swallows enthusiastically as The Suit strokes himself with excitement. When a newly rejuvenated, more pumped than every Super Stud II starts to flex his newly invigorated muscles, Suit can’t keep his hands off them, which seems to do nothing but stoke Damien harder and more intense.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-14h06m32s216 — Super Stud II yet again finds himself on his knees at the feet of Super Heel.

The unlikely tag team partners are full of confidence when they arrive ringside to put Super Heel in his place once and for all. True enough, the opening test of strength appears to be a stalemate, with advantage veering toward the double team’s way as Suit freezes time and pounds Super Heel’s vulnerable, frozen muscles. This is the first real challenge posed to the evil-consumed Super Heel. Could the deal-with-the-devil tag team have finally dialed up the super villain’s number? Oh fuck no! Super Heel isn’t using even 2% of his Alpha Male super villain strength. When he really tries, all he has to do his flex his hot, lycra-encased muscles and both Super Stud II and The Suit are dropped to their knees.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-14h10m09s96 — Super Heel is in the driver’s seat, ripping Super Stud’s arms out at the shoulder.

The Suit is nearly choke-slammed right out of this world. Even as Super Stud II pleads with him to rally, the self-serving hunk in black freezes time and flees the scene, leaving Super Stud II at the mercy of the malevolence and sadism of Super Heel. Those who know MDW already know the tone of a Muscle Master Kevin squash. There’s a non-stop monologue of the blue-eyed, whisker-faced babyface badboy, describing his destiny for domination even as he rips Super Stud’s hot, doomed body apart joint by going.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-14h11m46s47 — A head scissors/hair pull demonstrates how effortlessly in control Super Heel is.

Super Stud suffers long and hard, more and more humiliated with each passing second. These are two of my favorite bodies locked in intimate, punishing holds, with lavish loads of taunting and verbal torment making equal parts delicious cake and sweet icing. There’s a poignant moment when Super Stud II pleads for the Suit to return, to come to his rescue. His mental anguish is almost as sexy as his corporal punishment. Please, please, he begs for Suit to return to the fray. He doesn’t.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-14h13m44s207 — Damien’s lycra clad ass steals several scenes!

A few meta-narrative notes to share: Damien’s ass squeezed into a metallic lycra super suit nearly converts me to a full on lycra fetishist. That. Ass! There’s also something almost supernatural (coincidentally) about how brightly Kevin’s incredibly blue eyes shine next to Damien’s blue bodysuit. Technically, the wrestling is second to the narrative in this match, so serious wrestling fans should be cautioned: this is much more aimed at kitsch, superhero, and lycra kinks than it’s directly aimed at wrestling fanatics. But that said, Damien is suffering more convincingly every time I see him. Muscle Master Kevin’s sell of the effortless demigod is almost too convincing. I’m more moved by hot, dominating effort than such a squash that the boy on top would never break a sweat in a million years. But there are enough lingering scissors, chokes, and just enough slams filling up the ring to keep me on board.

vlcsnap-2013-12-26-14h14m24s84 — Vanquishing the babyface hero

Finally, I want to note that Muscle Domination Wrestling is starting to distinguish themselves as boy geniuses in the business, not for their world class sells, not for a particularly innovative business model, not for production quality… but for vocabulary. There’s a strong whiff of college nerds turned wrestling hunks about this match. What other homoerotic wrestling match do you know of that includes dialogue featuring words such as “dystopia,” “temerity,” and “hubris.” Over the top macho domination and a well-read, $20-word chatter is a sweet combination that makes me smile.

Oh, and back to the narrative, don’t push “stop” when the scene fades to black. There’s a post-script stinger with the appearance of a furry, naked ass getting slipped into gray lycra. A new super character slowly turns, revealing himself, looking like someone who’s ready to pose a new and serious challenge to Super Heel for evil world domination. I smell a season 2!