Category: Kid Karisma

Reader’s Choice Poll – Dinner Date

wrestlebard4 Comments
When asked which presidential candidate they would prefer to visit their home for dinner, 52% of respondents named President Obama, compared with just 33% of them selecting $omney.  Personally, I think this is the most useless polling question to be asked every four years, but sadly the American electorate seems to consistently prioritize this kind of popularity contest over actual qualifications for leading this country (foreign policy experience? a grasp of the legislative process? the capacity to make life-and-death decisions with regard to the use of military power and weapons of mass destruction?  no, we’re more likely to vote based on who we’d prefer to have dinner with… oy).  That’s enough of my political analysis for today, other than to alert my Swedish readers once again that if Tax-Dodger $omney is elected in November, I expect one of you to sponsor me as a political refugee.
I say let’s save such weighty questions like who we’d prefer to visit our homes for dinner for really important matters, like considering our favorite homoerotic wrestlers.  Sure, dinner table repartee isn’t exactly all that relevant to what compels us most in picking our homoerotic wrestling fare, but I still say it’s more relevant to wrestlers than politicians.  So this reader’s choice poll asks you to consider who you’d most prefer to have over for dinner.  I’m limiting the field to those who’ve demonstrated at least a little of their communication skills by being interviewed on the pages of this blog.  You can nominate someone else in the comments below, but the names on the poll are strictly drawn from the “friends of the blog” on record. This is about the dinner table, mind you.  Don’t base your choice on who’d you prefer to make you suffer in a head scissors in the living room after dinner.  We’re talking about an evening absent of actual wrestling (though of course the dinner conversation is entirely available to muse on the topic).  We’re also not talking about who you want to fuck.  This is an evening in which no semblance of sexual contact is going to happen.  You can decide how to instruct your dinner guests with regard to attire, so you can eye-fuck them across the table all night long, but physical contact is limited to handshakes and, let’s just say, a lingering, full-body hug to say goodnight (no ass squeeze!).  The real question is who would you like sitting across the table from you to talk with, to ask for their insights, to tell them what’s on your mind, to wax philosophical about wrestling or politics or religion or whatever topic the two of you want to talk about.  So that’s the background.  Here are your choices of dinner guests:

Lon Dumont: the first wrestler to grant me an interview a year and a half ago, Lon’s body and wrestling skills have earned him a permanent spot at or very near the top of my favorites ever since I first set eyes on him.  His ring banter was one of the most entertaining and arousing aspects of his work that captured my attention and keeps me coming back for more.  But his interview was a revelation into the diverse passions and thoughtful, open-minded outlook on life that make me think Lon would make an absolutely delightful dinner guest. Topics you would most likely find yourself discussing: bodybuilding, pets, indy wrestling, homoerotic wresting, hairstyles, freedom from religion, and Rocky.

Ken Canda: this classic from the early days of BG East has his picture next to the definition of the phrase: hot jobber.  His wrestling is foundational watching for those with any interest in seeing the evolution of the pro wrestling babyface jobber into an entirely unique and incredibly arousing fixture tailored to the tastes of the gay wrestling kink audience.  No, you DON’T get to pound him in an OTK backbreaker and claw his balls, though under different circumstances, I suspect he may very well be open to it (so save it for your second date).  But as evidenced in his extensive interview on the pages of this blog, Ken is happy to stroll down memory lane and tell you absolutely intoxicating tales of behind the cameras shenanigans from the early days at BGE, including delightful descriptions of every wrestler he faced and just how incredibly arousing it was to be brutalized over and over again.  You will hear about the esprit de corps that forged bonds of brotherhood and homoerotic beauty among the men who truly enjoyed each other’s company on and off camera, as well as the insights of a fellow wrestling kinkster who continues to live and love the eroticism of wrestling whenever he gets the chance.

Kid Karisma: As he explained in our interview last January, there’s a reason the Boss gave him the moniker Kid Karisma! While you won’t have the chance to get your hands on that legendary muscle ass of his over dinner, you can get lost gazing into those baby blues and have your feet swept right out from underneath you (metaphorically) by that sly, sideways grin and a wink from the man who is as charismatic as they come! He’ll entertain you with the extremely hot candid photos he takes with his phone, and just between the two of you, he’s likely to spill all the dirt on the best, baddest, horniest and hottest action to go on behind the scenes at BG East. I recommend not serving your best china, because I’m guessing this insatiable party boy could be dancing on the table before dessert!

Eli Black: a wrestling match with this hot young phenom would put you on your back in a heartbeat, but a no-holds dinner date with the boy wonder would, no doubt, just as surely keep you on your toes.  As I learned first hand in our interview last February, he’s got an in-your-face charm that I personally find completely disarming, but don’t let your defenses down too quickly.  Eli is not a man to be trifled with, and polite chit chat about the weather or the price of tea in China will earn you a withering insult and sneer of contempt.  But if you’re up for a dinner guest who loves a debate, who wants nothing more than to meet the man who’ll give as hard as he gets, and who never, ever tires of talking about the most important topic of all: himself; then Eli may be your man. I’m also guessing he’ll have his shirt and pants off in a heartbeat if you show a little interest in his ink (but remember, you don’t get to touch, just admire hands-free).

Steel Muscle God “Dan”: SMG rocked my world when he agreed to chat with me about the life of an online bodyworship phenom with an innate understanding of wrestling kink.  While you are not allowed to lick his steel muscles from head to toe during this dinner date, I guarantee you that you’ll feel a stirring deep down in your pants the moment he opens his luscious lips and growls out his erotically charged baritone.  Seriously, this man oozes sexiness. He could make me cum by reading the phonebook, and I’ll be damned if I wouldn’t come back for more of the same as soon as I reloaded.  Although you can’t touch it, SMG is an unapologetic exhibitionist, so whatever attire you specified, plan on seeing him take it off before the meal is over.  Be prepared to laugh a lot, because he’s got an entrancing sense of humor, and he’s the only hot bodied hunk I know with both the balls to take our money to worship his naked body AND poke fun at himself.  Conversation is likely to revolve around friends, working out, and censorship on the net, but seriously… just shut the fuck up, watch his gorgeous lips move, and let that voice transport you to your fondest fantasies.
Skip Vance: although I haven’t enjoyed a full-length interview with him yet, Skip did considerately take  the time to give me some on-the-record feedback on my take on his real life lover and rumored-to-be tag team partner, former homoerotic wrestler of the month Christian Taylor.  An unapologetic jobber with a crazy lust for getting his hot bod bashed mercilessly, he’s off limits for you to dish out any of your own corporal punishment you’ve been inspired to fantasize about after watching Skip at work! But I can guarantee you that you’ll definitely hear him gush about his life of domestic bliss with Christian (including their private wrestling routines), his fierce lust for wrestling, and the catalog of crushing humiliation he’s suffered at the hands of… well, everyone!  Don’t be surprised to also get a strong dose of workers’ rights and musings on healthy cooking, because he’s one well-rounded babyface masochist!

Ben Monaco: in our interview in June, Ben gave neverland readers a glimpse into what it’s like for a new kid on the block to get “discovered” by the star-makers at BG East.  His hungry lips are completely off limits to you this night, mind you, but perhaps you’ll decide to serve popsicles for desert so you can watch him wrap those baby’s around something long and suck it hard.  He’s a new face in the homoerotic wrestling universe, but I can assure you that you’ll enjoy plenty of delightful insights into erotic wrestling from him.  Ask him about the gallons of sweat he drenches his opponents with… go ahead, I dare you, because after listening to him describe his body slipping and sliding across his opponent’s drenched muscles, you’ll be politely excusing yourself to take care of a pressing need that’s arisen in your crotch.  If you can convince him that you can keep a secret, he’ll tell you straight up who’s doing what on camera and off, and he’ll give you his unvarnished opinion on the ranks he’s still working to rise within.

Cage Thunder: my interview in July was just the tip of the iceberg about knowing the man beneath the mask.  You know you want him to knee you in the balls and crush your face into his crotch as you grovel in front of him, but none of that is allowed on this dinner date! So take a cold shower and pick out your finest mask to wear, because Cage Thunder is a class act who’ll demand the best.  Points of discussion to prepare for: wrestling, gear, New Orleans, erotica, boys he’s bashed, boys he’s still waiting to bash, the existential implications of all of the above… If you’re daring, though, you’ll just mention the name “Mitch Colby,” and then sit back and watch the sparks fly for hours on end!

Darius: also granting me an interview in July, bodybeautiful private wrestling hunk turned BG East muscle beast, Darius would be a charming dinner date, I’m certain.  There’s just something about him that makes me think of the word “gentlemanly.”  If it’s the custom in your house, I expect he wouldn’t think twice about taking his shoes off when entering.  Hell, tell him it’s the custom in your house and I bet the beautiful hunk of muscle would take all his clothes off to show you your proper respect, because he’s not shy for an instant about showing skin! Working out, the underground wrestling circuit, his plans to destroy SMG in body and soul… all these are likely topics you’ll cover over the course of the evening, but the only thing you’ll remember when the napkins are put down and the last of the wine gone is falling into those gorgeous eyes and watching his knee-buckling sexy lips move as he talks to you.  Go ahead and tell him it’s the custom in your house that dinner guests flex for their dessert. Darius is not a man to neglect the niceties! 

Cameron Mathews: just last month I interviewed your final option for a dinner date with a homoerotic wrestler.  I know you want Cam and Lon to show up together, preferably to reprise their indy wrestling days and wrestle one another in your living room, but it’s not going to happen this time! If it’s Cam who strikes your fancy, just remember you can look at that legendary bubble butt, but you can’t touch! He’s pretty much the epitome of a babyface, but don’t think for an instant that you’ll have some naive kid tucking his napkin in his shirt and asking you to pass the ketchup for his filet mignon.  This veteran of nearly every production company across homoerotic and straight-up independent wrestling known to man has seen it all, and if you’re ready to show him his proper respect, I bet he’ll keep the conversation lively with stories from the long road of making a living with a passionate love of wrestling, a hot body, and boyish good looks. If you’re looking for reflections on post-Marxist critical philosophers, Cam may not be your man, because he lives, breathes, eats and drinks nothing but wrestling, my friends.  But if it’s every aspect of wrestling from coast to coast, hardbody to doughboy, ring to mat, jobber to heel that will delight you, then you can’t go wrong with picking Cam.

Register your vote at the right. Only one vote per person (this is highly scientific!). Polls close in 2 days. Lobbying for your choice in the comments below is strongly encouraged.

Right This Moment!!!!

wrestlebard4 Comments
Over the past three and a half years, I’m proud to say that neverland has been fortunate to be able to bestow the title of “friend of the blog” upon several worthy men.  Many of them include some of my very favorite homoerotic wrestlers who’ve given us a wink and a nod by sharing a comment, a candid pic, and even more than a handful of interviews.  So when word started coming my way from friends of the blog that there were about to be some exciting happenings in Pembroke this weekend, I got that warm feeling that comes from appreciating good friends (and, oh yeah, anticipating hot, blood-pumping homoerotic wrestling!).
Sexy rookie and friend-of-the-blog Ben Monaco
Ben Monaco was first to give me a heads up that he had a plane ticket in hand, bound for Boston and some muscle pumping BG East wrestling shoots. Quoted here, with permission:

“I’ll be heading down to the Pembroke location for the first time in about 2 weeks! I’m really excited! It’s like a visiting a holy-land 😛  I’ll be down there with what promises to be about a dozen guys, a mix of old and new faces. Some names swirling around for that weekend include Christian Taylor, Skip Vance, Lon Dumont and Gabriel Ross among others. Rest assured that upon my return, I’ll have plenty of tales to tell and stories to share. Expect to see great matches from myself and all the other guys down there!”

Skip and Christian practice for tag-team competition!

And sure enough, within a day or two Skip Vance confirmed on his Facebook page that both he and his real-life lover (and former homoerotic wrestler of the month), Christian Taylor, were booked for a trip to BG East to film some matches.  Even more titillating and grist for many a wet dream, Skip had advertised a few weeks earlier looking for a tag team willing to face Christian and him together! I’ve been pleading for this very scenario for months now! Knowing that Skip and Christian are partners would add that much more fantastically sexy drama to a tag team match. Seriously, I almost offered a financial reward to any real-life lovers who would accept the challenge to face them! I might still be willing to! Skip promised me that he’d share some details after the weekend is over, and I’m desperately hoping to hear that he and Christian climbed into the ring together to face off against another pair of hot and horny-for-each-other hunks for a sweaty, bulging, preferably rip and strip match to a load blowing finish!

Then late last night I got this pic and this message from Kid Karisma:

Pumped and primed to do some damage: friend-of-the-blog Kid Karisma

“Heading to Boston to do some damage for the weekend!!!”

Yes, indeed, in addition to the line-up rumored by Ben Monaco, add to that list my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler and dizzyingly sexy party boy/muscle dominator: Kid Karisma!!!  I offered some completely unsolicited armchair advice to the karismatic-one about choices of gear and my suggestion that his monster quads and legendary glutes never look better than when he’s applying a standing leg scissors.  In response, Kid K pointed out that his legs are bigger than ever as a result of being in the middle of his rugby season and simultaneously training for a half Iron Man! Let’s just recap: Kid Karisma’s pride-and-joy legs are bigger than ever as he, at this very moment, his hammering down on some insanely lucky son of a bitch at the BG East compound!!? Like Skip and Ben, Kid K swore to give me what details the back office boys at BG East would allow once he’s back from Boston. I’m also lobbying to see those larger-than-ever quads of his. Stay tuned.

Stone-cold tease and friend-of-the-blog Lon Dumont

Finally, I reached out to long-time friend of the blog and perennial top-tier elite favorite homoerotic wrestler of mine, Lon Dumont, to verify whether there was any chance that he was, as rumored, on the ticket for action in Pembroke.  Cagey as always and a stone-cold sexy tease, Lon replied:

“Why yes, there is that chance!”

So once again, let me just recap, because I can hardly believe how hot this news is: at the very moment I write this, assembled at the BG East compound are, among many others, Ben Monaco, dripping in pools of sweat and hopefully laying a lucky opponent out in an aroused stupor with his devastingly hot lip-lock; Skip Vance and Christian Taylor who may (or may not) be about to appear in their first lovers tag team match (and if there is a homoerotic wrestling god, they’ll be facing another pair of sexed up lovers!); Kid Karisma flexing his larger-than-ever quads around the skull of some ridiculously lucky son of a bitch; and Lon Dumont who, I happen to know, is essentially moments away from entering the bodybuilding contest season and looking bigger and more ripped than ever in his life, and now showing up to blow apart some new opponents.  I couldn’t make up a hotter scenario.  I’d give my let nut to be a fly on the wall in Pembroke at this very moment! I’d at least give my undying loyalty and affection to see some behind-the-scenes shots of this incredibly intoxicating collection of fantasy men who have inspired countless hours of erotic entertainment and a parade of gasping orgasms punctuating a life of total devotion to homoerotic wrestling! There’s a reason Ben and I both consider the BG East compound the holy land.  That many homoerotic wrestling gods assembled in one place is nothing short of heaven!

Gabriel Ross: Let’s be friends!

And finally, don’t think I didn’t note the inclusion of reader’s choice winner for sexiest Brit on the BG East roster, Gabriel Ross, in the rumored roster pounding flesh in Pembroke this weekend!  The Boss promised (check out the comments section here) that the angelic little devil, Gabriel, was slated to cross the pond and face some of the domestic brewed hotness that BG East serves so well, including one of our (and specifically MY!) favorites!  I’m incredibly excited to find out if the pint-sized (but monster-dicked) babyface sado-masochist will be appearing in a new release soon, and who gets the lucky assignment to show him some hands-on Yankee hospitality!

Making Jake

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Jake Jenkins – 5’7″, 155 lbs.
There are a few more Olympic round robins still to post, but in the mean time I’m starting a new series that’s been on my mind for a while now.  The concept is simple. The prep required is exquisite.  It’s inspired by the sell of a former homoerotic wrestler of the month and regular go-to hunk that never fails to turn me on.  These are the ABC’s of Jake Jenkins.  Just complete the phrase, “Making Jake….”  Here are A through E on my list.  If you have additional photos that illustrate more of the ABC’s of Making Jake, send them along!
Making Jake…
… asphyxiate.
Lean, mean, devastatingly handsome Jayden Mayne is sick and tired of being a whipping boy at BG East, and to prove it, he delights in making Jake asphyxiate.
… bend.

The combo of Jake Jenkins barefoot and in white trunks paired with Kid Karisma in black (and in the ring!!!) is nothing short of genius! Kid Karisma does a stunningly beautiful job of making Jake bend.

… cry.

Jake has gone back and forth with nasty grappler Ethan Andrews, and on more than one occasion the lean, mean Ethan makes Jake cry.

… drowsy.

Jake also has a running feud with the always dangerous 2-time homoerotic wrestler of the month and friend of this blog (well, he talks to me…), Eli Black.  In there’s jock strap matroom sweat bath for BG East, Eli turns all of Jake’s cocky swagger and sculpted muscle into so much mush when he makes Jake drowsy.

… elated!

Jake’s got range, mind you, and it’s not all about making Jake suffer.  Joah Bindao is a hot little package who certainly makes jake work, but when he’s racked, bulging, and helplessly across Jake’s soaking shoulders, Noah can’t help himself but make Jake elated!

…to be continued.

Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month Interview

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Cage Thunder had a quick reply to my announcement that he’s one of the co-owners of my title of homoerotic wrestler of the month: “About fucking time!”  Building from that endearing exchange, I managed to get the legendary heel to agree to answer some questions on the occasion of his reign.

———
Cage Thunder
Bard: Congratulations on earning the homoerotic wrestler of the month title! Masked Mayhem 9 is incredibly sexy! What was it like for you teaming with Lightning Rod for your 2-on-1 destruction of that hunky little Stinger?
Chemistry!

Cage Thunder: It’s about fucking time. What’s wrong with you, anyway? You’ve figured out who my tag partner was—so you can imagine what an honor it was to be teamed with one of my wrestling idols—I can be just as big of a fan-boy as anyone! (laughs) And we definitely had chemistry in the ring…as you can tell from the video and from the stills, my dick was hard from the get go. I hope we can team up again… I’m certainly up for it, although I’m so attracted to him it’s hard for me to focus!

Bard: Consider the delay in your ascendency to the title as evidence of my lapse of judgment! So, categories often fail to fully capture the scope and depth of an artist’s work, so when I call you a “heel,” it feels awfully inadequate. How do you describe your body of work as a wrestler?

Cage Thunder: Sexual heeling (laughing)? I kind of like “lord of the ring” or “ringmaster.” 


Bard: (laughing) All three of those work for me!  Speaking of bodies, you always look incredible! You’ve clearly crafted a body built for destruction. For any aspiring masked heels out there, do you have any tips for physical conditioning for ring domination?

Adding up to HOT!

Cage Thunder: I do, don’t I?  I put a lot of work into my body. But fitness is more than weight-lifting, which so many people forget. It’s also flexibility and endurance. I fucking hate doing cardio, but it’s a necessary evil. I’ve always been really flexible, so stretching is something I do pretty regularly.  I have to give some credit to my genetics. I put on size really easily, and I also have a huge rib cage with a narrow pelvic bone, which results in me having a ridiculously small waist. Even at my heaviest and most out of shape, my waist size has never gone above 32-33; at my most lean I was a 28. I think I look best when I’m at a 31, frankly—smaller is too lean.  I’ve wanted to get up to 200 pounds for quite some time, but was reluctant to gain weight for a very long time. Thank to some injuries and teaching myself how to cook Louisiana cuisine, I did get really heavy for a while, but am leaning down now. My muscles are a lot bigger—and my goal is to get down to about 200-205 with a 31-32 waist. Right now I’m at 212 with a 32-33. 

Bard: Mmmm, numbers are hot! Whatever the calculus, it’s all adding up to one hot body! Do you have any mentors in the craft of brutal wrestling domination? What are some lessons you’ve learned from them?

Cage Thunder: Kid Leopard. The man has forgotten more about wrestling than I’ll ever know. I was already sort of a heel when I came to BGEast, but his mentoring, advice, and experience helped me develop into the wrestler I am now. There have been some amazing heels at BGEast over the years—the Brooklyn Bodywrecker; Clint Morgan; Cruz; Jose; The Enforcer; Shane McCall come to mind off the top of my head—all of whom are/were masters of the ring. I’ve learned from watching them, too. There’s nothing like watching a master heel just take some screaming muscle boy apart, is there? I’ve actually wrestled the Bodywrecker privately—that was a LOT of fun, and I learned a lot. I really enjoy wrestling other heels, frankly—there’s nothing hotter than a heel v. heel match to see who’s the bigger bad ass.

Bard: A private match with BBW?! Talk about a clash of the titans! That sounds seriously hot!  I’ve got a thing for hunks who wrestle in masks. You’re a perfect case in point: you’ve got a smokin’ sexy body, but damn it all if that mask doesn’t multiple my arousal a dozen times over. Other than turning on guys like me, is there anything else behind your choice to wrestle in a mask?

Pink Puma never stood a chance!

Cage Thunder:  I’d already been doing some wrestling as a heel, but the mask completed the package. Again, it was the Boss’ idea, and I really took to it, frankly. I’d never really given it much of a thought before—despite living in a city that’s all about masking! Now, I fucking love it. I’ve done some private matches where all I wear is the mask…and unmasking your opponent? HOT.

Bard: Hot, indeed!  And speaking of heat, you’ve laid down some withering trash talk on the pages of this blog for one of my long-standing all-time favorite homoerotic wrestlers, Mitch Colby. What’s with the heat over hot, hunky Mitch? Is there a backstory there?

Cage Thunder: Listen at yourself—‘hot hunky Mitch.’ Excuse me for a second while I lose my lunch. I just flat out don’t like him—I’ve never liked guys like him; arrogant and think their looks somehow make them better than everyone else. I’d like to tie him up in the ropes and just pound on him for a few hours, you know, beat some fucking humility into the arrogant bitch—not that it would do any good. And hoist him up into a torture rack and make him scream like the bitch he is…strip his trunks off him and shove them into his mouth while I claw his pecs so his screams of agony are muffled…sleeper him until he’s almost out, then let up so I can torture him some more…I want to see how much those abs he’s so fucking proud of can handle. I bet he’d be begging me to stop within five minutes of the bell ringing. (laughs) If the stupid bitch even lasted that long…

What did Mitch Colby ever do to earn such ire!

Bard: Well, I for one never, ever get tired of seeing Mitch in action. I’ll continue to lobby for that match to happen! So let’s say you just climbed into the ring. You don’t know who your opponent is – never heard of him, never seen him before. He comes sprinting out of the locker room, hops the top rope inside the ring, and stands bouncing on the balls of his feet in the opposite corner from you. He’s your picture-perfect opponent. Describe him.

Cage Thunder: You know, I don’t really have a ‘type,’ per se. I’ve been accused of being a body fascist more times than I can count, but it’s not true. I like big guys, I like small guys, I like lean guys, I like bears—I like all different types, really—and at BGEast I’ve had a broad range of body types to wrestle; from little guys like Boyd Hicks and Kid Karisma to pretty muscleboys like Goldenrod (what a fucking poseur he was!) to big guys like Alexi Adamov and Drew Russell. I’ve always had a thing for classic heels, like Stan Hansen and Arn Anderson, but I also like the lean muscle studs like Kevin Von Erich and Randy Orton…. Oh! I know who—Ryan Kwanten from “True Blood.” Put him in some skimpy white trunks, white leather knee-high lace up boots, some white kneepads…oh HELL yeah. He’s my current fantasy opponent. You want to write that one up?

Let’s get Ryan Kwanten suited up and in the ring with Cage Thunder NOW!

Bard: I’ll get right on that, as soon as I can manage to somehow zip up my pants! The image of Ryan as a white knight staring you down across the ring is going to distract me for days! Mmm, mmm, mmm! Okay, so name names! Who’s posed the toughest challenge to you at BGE? Who’s the sexiest opponent you’ve faced? Who (other than Mitch) would you still love to get your hands on?

Cage Thunder: I would have to say the toughest challenge I’ve had at BGEast (in matches released thus far) would have to be Alexi Adamov. We didn’t do a one-on-one match; we were on opposite sides of a tag match. I’ll give him some props—he put me through the ringer; an amazing display of back torture, hold after hold after hold. When I watched the match later I was like, “damn!” He made me submit, and then we had to face each other again to open the next round, and he almost finished me off once and for all—Max came to my rescue—and while I did get in the ring with him a few more times during the match and just beat the holy hell out of him, I’ve always wondered how a singles match would turn out between us. I mean, I know I’d beat him—he doesn’t seem to ever be able to close out a match—but I think we’d have a good fight—probably would be a classic.

Sweaty, sexy Alexi put Cage Thunder through the ringer!

Bard: Fascinating! I’d never have guessed that Alexi would be the first name out of your mouth! He’s so damn pretty, it’s easy to forget that he’s one big, tough son of a bitch as well! What about sexiest?

Cage Thunder: All of my opponents at BGEast were sexy, no question about that. I’d say the sexiest wrestler I’ve ever been in the ring with is undoubtedly Lightning Rod. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Sensuality just fucking oozes out of his pores…he’s one of those men you KNOW would be the best fuck you’ve ever had, the kind that would inspire me to all kinds of sexual depravity…I’d like to be locked in a motel room with him for a weekend. FUCK.


Bard: No argument from me there!

Cage Thunder: I also have to give props to Boyd Hicks. I don’t know what it was about him, but the minute I laid eyes on him my cock get hard, and it stayed hard all the way through the match. We had chemistry, for sure. We’re supposed to get together for a private match the next time I’m over there, and I’m really looking forward to it.  Kid Karisma has one of the most gorgeous asses I’ve ever seen, and Punk Puma was a sexy boy, too. Damn, I’ve wrestled some hot guys! 

“…one of the most gorgeous asses I’ve ever seen…”

Bard: I’ve toyed with the idea of creating a title for most gorgeous wrestling ass on the planet, which would obviously belong for all eternity to Kid K! And Pink Puma is another long, long, long-standing crush of mine. So who else would you like to face?

Cage Thunder: Let’s see, who at BGEast would I like to wrestle that I haven’t? I’ve got a thing for Jake Jenkins and Austin Cooper—they are pretty boys; maybe Lightning Rod and I could do a tag match with them on the other side of the ring. Joe Robbins. Braden Charren. I’ve always wanted to wrestle Chris Bruce. Denny Cartier—holy Christ, that one! Patrick Donovan would be fun in the ring, I think. Oh, man, how could I forget the Enforcer? A ring war to see who the real masked stud of BGEast is? Talk about Masked Mayhem! Chase LaChance has also beefed up real nice.  But really, I’d be willing to take on anyone on the roster, past or present.

Bard: That doesn’t surprise me. You certainly wrestle like you’ve never met an opponent you aren’t thrilled to crush! You blogged recently about your early wrestling career in which you weren’t quite the unstoppable brutalizer that you are these days. You describe how it can feel to get seriously worked over by a dominating opponent. I quote you here, when you say, “Fuck you pussy – it feels good.” Where do you think the connection comes from between dishing out or taking punishment in the ring and getting turned on?

Cage Thunder: (laughing) As I said earlier, I’m pretty flexible, so I can be stretched a lot further than just about anyone. Usually guys are screaming out a submission long before they get stretched out as far as I can go. The great irony is that I am SO flexible that I can’t really stretch myself as far as I need to be stretched on my own; I need someone else to stretch me. So when someone, you know, puts me into a banana split or a Boston crab, it DOES feel good—the stretch feels incredible to me because I can’t stretch myself like that on my own.  But that’s not really what you asked, was it? It’s really a primal, masculine thing. When you’re dominating another man, you’re proving yourself to be the better animal. And its arousing—very much so. In wrestling, your body is your weapon, and you’re proving your body is better, you’re stronger, more dominant, more masculine…how can your cock NOT get hard?

Bard: I’m the last person to have an answer to that question!

Cage Thunder: And the flip side of domination is submission, which is also arousing. Is there anything sexier than a dominant man, who can control you, of being completely at his mercy? It’s also really sexy to test your own limits, see how much you can take. My profile on Globalfight sums it up: “Beat me or prepare to be beaten.” I love being beaten, dominated…but you have to earn it; I’m not going to just roll over and let you have your way with me. Fuck that. Beat me or be beaten…and if you don’t beat me, be prepared, because I will fucking beat you down and humiliate you, you will be my bitch when I am finished with you—and I’ll decide when you’re finished. I ask for no quarter, and I give none.

Bard: Damn.  Um, yeah. Damn! You’ve said it better than I’ve ever heard it said before! You consistently deliver some of the sexiest, most erotic wrestling content being produced, as far as I’m concerned. What do you think about the state of the homoerotic wrestling industry these days? Where do you see it heading in the next 10 years? Who are the rookies you see in the business who you think could have staying power over the long-haul?

Cage Thunder: I don’t really pay all that much attention to other companies, frankly. I’ve been accused of being a BGEast shill with my blog, which is bullshit. I write about BGEast matches and wrestlers because they’re the ones that turn my crank the hardest. I do buy some stuff from Rock Hard from time to time; they have some beautiful boys wrestling for them—some of them have come over to BGEast, in fact. I wish that Lucas Payne would…I’d love to get in the ring with him. He’s a sexy fuck, and he’s talented.

Lucas Payne: “…a sexy fuck, and he’s talented.”

Bard: Ah, Lucas Payne! Another homoerotic wrestler of the month! The idea of him bringing what he’ got and BG East doing with it what it does… wow!

Cage Thunder: I hate the companies that pretend their audience isn’t gay men. Get a grip, bitches. Straight men and women aren’t buying your goddamned product; they can watch WWE on pay-per–view or basic cable. I think it’s homophobic, frankly. BGEast is not ashamed of their audience and they say so, right up front: “gay interest wrestling videos.” I won’t give my money to a company that’s ashamed of why I’m buying their product. It’s my porn, and always has been. A match doesn’t have to wind up erotic for me to enjoy it, but if there’s a physical erotic connection with my opponent I’m not going to push him away and say, “Oh, no, I just wrestle.” I prefer my opponents be in decent shape, if for no other reason than I want the match to last a while; I don’t want to get all suited up and then have him poop out after ten minutes.

Bard: I hear you! And I completely agree about never-say-gay gay wrestling as homophobic. I’d pay a whole lot more attention to other companies if they came out of the closet!

Cage Thunder: I don’t really know about the business end of the business; but I assume as with everything, it’s taken a hit with the economy. And I know piracy is a major issue. I don’t know why these douchebags think it’s okay to steal; calling it piracy doesn’t make it hip and cool, because it’s still fucking stealing. If you came into my house and stole one of my DVD’s, how is that different from downloading it for free from some motherfucking asshole’s free site? And even if the motherfucker who put it up paid for it to begin with, you’re not buying the right to distribute it to the entire world for free. It’s theft, and it should be called what it is. The music industry put a stop to that shit.

Bard: The boys at BG East talked about this quite a bit when I visited there last year. They clearly see it is a real threat to the viability of the industry, not to mention their company. Any thoughts about where the industry is heading?

Cage Thunder: I can’t predict what the industry will be ten years from now because I can’t foresee how technology is going to change and develop. Ten years ago I would have never dreamed of digital downloads or even DVD’s, for that matter. (I do NOT miss videotape.)

Bard: Neither do I. Blue balls waiting to rewind, stop, and start to find the choice piece of action were horrible!

Cage Thunder has respect for Z-Man

Cage Thunder: As for what newcomers have staying power, I’d say that Austin Cooper, Kid Karisma, Jake Jenkins, and Z-Man will be stars for as long as they want to be. Z-Man gets a lot of shit—I’ve seen some really awful smack talked about him on-line, but he’s got a great body and he has talent. The stuff he’s done for BGEast has really started tapping his potential, and there’s even more there. Kid Karisma is just a stud. I really like Morgan Cruise, too—he’s impressed the hell out of me, as has Diego Diaz. And Joe Robbins—I hope he sticks around for a while. The Boss always seems to come up with amazing new talent. 


Bard: I admit that I’m guilty of having given Z-Man my fair share of that shit. I’m also happy to say that I’ve completely turned the corner since he’s been working with BG East. And every one of the guys you mention are absolutely golden in my book!


Cage Thunder: And I’m not ready to hung up my trunks just yet.


Bard: (laughing) That’s fantastic news! I’m looking forward to seeing more of your potent brand of homoerotic wrestling entertainment! You’re a class act, and I’m grateful for this chance to get to know more of the man behind the mask!

Cage Thunder hasn’t hung up his trunks just yet!

Chasing Rio

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JoshH gave me a heads up that Rio Garza, who competes in fitness competitions as Alan Valdez, won the Model Universe 2012 Overall title last week! Our little boy is all grown up, and just like legions of homoerotic wrestling fans, the fitness model world can’t take their eyes off of Rio’s ripped, gorgeous body. 

Reports are that Rio/Alan longs to be the most successful Mexican fitness model in history. While I’m no expert, I have to guess that he can check that box as he hoists his Model Universe trophy overhead. His proportions and fitness, particularly when he’s ripped, are superhuman! I’d expect to see a physique like this in the Louvre, or reclining in a toga on Mr. Olympus, so a Model Universe competition victory for this smoldering beauty seems somehow anti-climactic.

JoshH has mentioned to me often what an epic score it was for homoerotic wrestling fans when lovely Rio dipped his suckable toes into our corner of the pool. If you’ve lived under a rock for the past 3 or 4 years, you may not know that he’s wrestled for Rock Hard Wrestling (as Ray Martinez), for BG East, and for Can-Am. He’s featured in the just-past BG East catalog getting caught up in between some tough daddy-cub conflict in his self-titled Rio’s Bad Day. Rio’s Revenge is still on the list of “most popular titles” for Can-Am. Mr. Model Universe 2012 at the mercy of sadistic underground wrestlers putting on the show for gay eyes is, without a doubt, quite a score for homoerotic wrestling fans!

Cameron and Paul make Rio reconsider if he really wants to be a pro wrestler!

While Rio is living large on the stage of his fitness competition life, his journey through homoerotic wrestling products has been a tougher row to hoe.  It’s no wonder that every sadistic bastard in wrestling can’t wait to get their hands on his award winning physique. “Pretty” can be like a giant red target on the lickable ass of a fitness model, and muscleman lovely Rio is dripping with pretty.  Put him in the room with a couple of high flying indy pro veterans like Cameron Mathews and Paul Hudson, and just sit back and wait for the double team pec claw and neck breaker combo to bring godlike Rio to screaming, humiliated submission.

Rio shoves his lust for revenge in Jobe Zander’s face.

I’ve complained about Rio often not quite striking a selling combo of erotic and wrestling to fully satisfy my homoerotic wrestling fetish. However, his more recent appearances are scratching an itch that I’ve long longed for an ambitious Mexican fitness model to scratch. Exacting revenge on frequent tormentor Jobe Zander, the Latino adonis’ schoolboy pin, slapping down his junk on the throat of the notorious heel, is poignant homoerotic character development for an innocent, naive poser like Rio.  It seems like Jobe has finally, finally, finally awakened the beast, and whether Rio ends up on top or not, a fitness model flex with his balls dangling in his opponent’s face can feed my hunger for quite a while!

Sweaty Rio opens wide for dominating muscle god, Kid Karisma.

There’s probably nothing tastier for my taste buds than the first sight I caught of Rio wrestling, on the receiving end of a schoolboy pin this time, with the battering ram of my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler, ripped red-headed musclegod Kid Karisma resting on his chin, in BG East’s Undagear 15. Rio’s wrestling “prowess” back then wasn’t what was yanking my chain, and the confrontation earned nothing but dripping contempt from the Karismatic one, whose tastes and opinions I tend to follow with somewhat worshipful adoration.  But the visual contrast of these two fantasy men, with rippling Rio coated in sweat and flat on his back with his jock-strapped ass cheeks vulnerably spread at the mercy of Kid K’s flexing physique does all sorts of wonderful things for me. With “legitimate” mainstream fame under his belt, I have to wonder if new release Rio’s days are numbered. Likely, they already were, I imagine, as the producers of new content dip into their unreleased catalog to keep muscle-in-trouble fans sated with suffering Rio. While his homoerotic wrestling career left me flipping through other pages at points, I whole heartedly agree with JoshH on two points: homoerotic wrestling fans were lucky to see his likes performing our fantasies, and he deserves a hearty congratulations and best wishes for more modeling successes to continue. Keep flexing, Rio!

Still-Frame Fantasies

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I’ve been working my ass off so hard that the month of May is pretty much a wash when it comes to my favorite past-time: checking out new homoerotic wrestling releases. I’m just throwing in the towel and putting an asterisk in the homoerotic wrestler of the month competition for May 2012. The throne will remain empty for the month.  I have a strong suspicion that there will be a new title holder once June has played out, however. BG East has released Catalog 93, and it’s packed with some of my long time fantasyman crushes as well as more recent infatuations, any one of which could (and most of them have) easily bitchslapped the competition and claim the title. I’m also entranced with the hotness of new Rock Hard wrestler Britboy Will Stanley landing just in time for the queen’s diamond jubilee. Only 5 days into the month and based solely on still-frame fantasies, here are the immediate front runners for June’s title.
Denny Cartier crotch pins Joah Bindao

Denny’s back! Just the photos alone of hot Denny Cartier can tide me over, and in his Gazebo Grapplers 13 appearance he’s looking tastier than ever. Those eyes, that smile, the dimpled chin, wide strong shoulders, gorgeous chest, luscious ass, strong legs, and look at those forearms… all of that and some of the highest quality grappling I love, and Denny could easily be a 2-time homoerotic wrestler of the month. And hot little muscleman Joah Bindao is definitely a rising stock.

Jake Jenkins threatens to dismember Jayden Mayne
Gazebo Grapplers 13 is catching me eye from start to finish, including Jake Jenkins looking possibly hotter than I’ve ever seen. Is it the trunks? Is it that hot, “monkey boy” body? Is it that his eyes looking like he’s about to carve into Thanksgiving turkey as he stares down handsome scrapper, Jayden?  Jake’s done it once and could easily do it again, wrestling his way into another homoerotic wrestler of the month title.
Joshua Goodman’s crotch might choke out Christopher Bruce!

And yet another Gazebo Grapplers 13 match is turning my crank in still-frame! Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) could read the phone book and I’d be off before he got to Aanerud (as long as he’s in nothing but those skimpy white trunks)! I’ve never seen a Mr. Joshua match that fails to make me weak in the knees, and pitting him against perennial powerhouse and sexy thinker Christopher Bruce could easily propel either of these men into the lead.  It seems impossible that Mr. Joshua has not yet owned the title of homoerotic wrestler of the month. Could his Susan Lucci moment arrive in June?

Stinger in trouble from every angle!

My, oh my, Masked Mayhem 7 could be a superhero homoerotic wrestling fantasy for the record books! Lean, sexy Stinger’s partner doesn’t show up, and the brave masked man agrees to face both legendary heel Cage Thunder and his new tag partner, unmistakably menacing long, hard hottie Lightning Rod. Cage Thunder has yet to own the title of homoerotic wrestler of the month on these pages, but could this be the month on the strength of what looks like an astonishingly sexy, brutal double-team?

Skip Vance in agony under the control of Kid Karisma

Speaking of astonishingly sexy, the pairing of incredibly hot champion jobber, Skip Vance and my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy division), Kid Karisma, has the potential to be epic! I’ve lobbied the boys at BG East for a long-overdue Wrestler Spotlight starring Kid K’s world class muscle ass! Skip hasn’t held the title, but Kid K was living large and in charge as homoerotic wrestler of the month 11 months ago. Either of these stunners could easily own it this month.

Fiercely hot newbie Diego Diaz launches Morgan Cruise
Neither Morgan Cruise nor newbie heartthrob Diego Diaz have held the homoerotic wrestler of the month title yet, but I could easily see their face-off for Morgan’s Spotlight earning one of them the distinction for June. Hurricane Morgan is like a force of nature lately, leveling every hot, hunky face placed in his way. And ripped, snarling, Latino powerhouse Diego has captured my imagination like no current newcomer. It’s a rare feat to be homoerotic wrestler of the month on the strength of just 2 matches, but the Latino giant could definitely make that happen.

Mitch Colby makes batboy Aryx Qinn pucker up
Mitch Colby has owned every title I could ever dream up. If Mitch and Diego Diaz were to ever tag team,   my life could very well be complete. In the mean time, his hairy chested, sweat soaked ring pounding with Aryx Quinn makes Mitch an instant contender for a 2nd trip to the winner’s circle.
Austin sweats through his jock while he shows off Patrick Donovan’s best side.

Austin Cooper is everywhere lately! For sheer ironman hotness (not to mention Goldenboy beauty and a top notch bubble butt) Austin is a contender for the title he has yet to possess. And Patrick Donovan is an instant contender, and I strongly suspect that Patrick has made a pact with Satan, because he’s done nothing but get sexier and more gorgeous with each and every match he’s wrestled in his long and lustrous career! That ass alone deserves a title, and he could absolutely deserve the homoerotic wrestler of the month title for his Matmen 23 face-off with the Goldenboy.

Austin does chiropractic work on Britboy rookie Will Stanley.

And my last instant infatuation for the first 5 days of June is Rock Hard Wrestling’s rookie lovely, Will Stanley. See, Austin’s back (making for 2 nominations for the title this month), but like Joe, I’m immediately craving a closer look at handsome, ripped hunk Will Stanley. That body, that ink, that face, AND an accent? Nostalgia alone could tip the scales to Will Stanley, Esquire, in honor of the queen’s diamond jubilee.

Hot, hot, hot start to summer, homoerotic wrestling fans!

Bodies Over Time – Homoerotic Wrestler of the Month Edition

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Reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month: Christian Taylor
(aka Chris Cox)
Christian Taylor rocks. He’s stunning in still frame. Long, perpetually lean, gorgeously handsome square jaw, aquiline nose, piercing, long-lashed eyes, and a big, toothy, melting smile. I haven’t chatted with him in real time (though I’d love to!), but the hit I get off of his wrestling matches and his available photo sets is that he’s doesn’t quite believe just how sexy he is. A 6’2″, 175 lbs athlete with cover boy good looks who harbors some insecurity about his own attractiveness is one of the sexiest things on earth, I think.
Christian over time: (l) Undagear 15, (c) Sexy Showdown 6, and (r) Wet and Wild 6
This is a “bodies over time” post officially, but honestly, over the course of about 7 years appearing in homoerotic wrestling, his body has remained astonishingly hot. If anything, he’s getting more ripped, more handsome, and more confident with age. His pecs are a little fuller. He’s whittled his abs and obliques down to first-rate washboard condition. He looks like he’s lived into the long, sultry lines of his genetically blessed physique with more and more grace as he’s shown up over and over to put that beautiful body on the line in homoerotic wrestling.
Max Powers stretches out Chris’ hot, long body and highlights that bulging package
Christian earned his title as reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month on the strength of his ring match (wrestling as “Chris Cox“) against muscle bully Max Powers for Rock Hard Wrestling. As powerful and stimulating a sight as Max’s muscled body is, it’s Christian’s wrestling, suffering, and bulging package that make this straight-up wrestling match so freakin’ homoerotically hot!
(l) Christian Taylor and (r) Sean Patrick
As far as I can tell, Christian made his homoerotic wrestling debut, and has appeared most, wrestling for BG East. BG East has also featured some of his sexiest and most overtly homoerotic work, which is clearly a strong suit of BG East. Particularly in the physical shape Christian has been in for his most recent wrestling products, I can’t help but think of him as a new edition of classic BG East tall, cool drink of water, Sean Patrick. According to their published stats, Christian is just about an inch taller and a little heavier than Sean, but they’re both built similarly. I’d expect to see the looks of Christian on the cover of a magazine sooner than I’d expect to see (albeit handsome) Sean, but they have similar genetics.  And both of these lovely lean wrestlers have/had a similar not-so-secret weapon in their matches: opponents seem to melt when either of these handsome hotties lock their lips on them.
Austin Raines welcomes Christian to the world of
homoerotic wrestling in BG East’s Undagear 13

The wrestling “lip lock” is a move that I relish in homoerotic wrestling. I know that not everyone is with me on this, but unconditionally, when hard, hot, sweaty wrestling morphs into aggressive kissing and passionate groping, it sends my kink firing on all cylinders! And reviewing Christian’s resume (at BG East) makes it quite obvious that one opponent after another has tasted his lovely lips sooner or later in match after match.

Christian sucks the fight out of Blaine Janus in Undagear 15

Like Sean Patrick, when Christian’s mouth makes contact with an opponent, it seems to sap the battle right out of them. Who can stay focused on a fight when a hunk like Christian distracts you with a lingering lip lock? On top, on the bottom, in the heat of battle or as post-match foreplay, the beauty of battlers aroused by their wrestling and sucking face hot and heavy is an essential analogy to what turns me on at my core.

In Wrestleshack 12, Tim Sheridan seems unconcerned about being
put to his back once Christian starts to toy with his nipples and kiss him.

Of course, if it were just making out, I’d be entertained, but it wouldn’t exactly feed my kink. I enjoy seeing guys with their tongues down each other’s throats, but what arouses me most powerfully is watching hunks face off, throw down, crush and slam one another, and within that context, wrestlers driven to distraction by their own lustful lips tasting one another makes my ears whistle with the dramatic redistribution of blood flow in my body.

Christian neutralizes Tim’s bearhug in an instant

Christian’s wrestling gives me the impression that he “gets it” intuitively. I’m certain that there are plenty of wrestlers who punch the clock in homoerotic wrestling, earning the cash but not owning the kink.  That isn’t a problem, in and of itself, for me. As long as they can sell what I’m buying, my imagination and discerning eye can take from homoerotic wrestling all that I need, whether or not the antagonists walk away owning it for themselves. But Christian is one of the hotties that sells so well, either from the inside out or outside in, that I can’t help but think that he’s in “our” camp both on screen and off.

Kid Karisma conquers Christian, knocks him out cold, and then can’t resist
employing some mouth-to-mouth “resuscitation” 

And as someone I like to think of as “one of us,” what a delight it is to identify with Christian for all of the crazy, enviable positions he’s had the opportunity to find himself in on the mat and in the ring.

In Wet & Wild 5, Kid K buries Christian’s face
in his crotch long and hard.

Getting called out and absolutely owned by the likes of my reigning undisputed favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma, is enviable enough. But the sight of Christian’s face shoved in Kid’s K’s crotch, squeezed between the charismatic one’s pumped, muscled thighs, and then lip-locked in post-match foreplay is like jolts of electricity shooting through my body (the good kind).  And then, as Kid K lets his opponent lean his half-a-foot taller frame on him as they head into the sunroom, Christian stretches his mile long arm and platter-sized hand down and squeezes that epic muscle ass of Kid K’s! Holy shit! I’m so envious that I could start to hate my homoerotic wrestler of the month just a little.

Christian makes drop-dead gorgeous fantasyman Alexi Adamov
scream like his bitch in “Who’s Next?”

And what’s not to be insanely jealous of when you see Christian straddling sexy Alexi Adamov’s tanned, toned muscle body, nearly ripping the Russian’s shoulders out of their sockets, and sitting back on Alexi’s bodacious bubble butt to listen to the babyface scream!?  So he didn’t get a liplock on the Russian, but hot damn, a fellow wrestling kinkster putting it all on the line in the BG East backyard against the likes of pristine prettyboy fantasyman Alexi makes me absolutely ache with lust!

Jake Jenkins makes every inch of Christian suffer in
Wet & Wild 6
And it’s no wonder Christian keeps hanging out by the pool, when the likes of Kid Karisma and then Jake Jenkins show up for a wet and wild bully showdown!  Then contrast of sizes and body types between Christian and Jake makes my jaw drop. Jake’s 5’7″ muscle packed mat body tying up and twisting the infinitely long, graceful, powerful lines of Christian’s 6’2″ physique is a visual masterpiece. Someone like Christian with a proven track record of getting off on the eroticism of wrestling, paired with the intensely sincere amateur-come-pro likes of straight-up dominator Jake, is guaranteed to transport me from this side of the screen onto that very match, feeling it ache every ounce as much as Christian suffers.

Christian and real-life lover Skip are passionately merciless with one another
in Sexy Showdown 6

And damn, what could be hotter than to get paired with your very own real life lover, showing up in the BG East mat room to wrestle in a product that’s destined to be entitled “Sexy Showdown 6?” The torque that these two work up on each other’s joints, the humiliating domination that they exchange, paired with a genuine romance and physical lust for one another that spills over off the mat is like a homoerotic wrestling kinkster’s anthem. Taking Skip Vance, making him hurt, taking some punishment from him and then squeezing out a final fall, once-and-for-all (until they get home) victory over the man he’ll wake up in the morning next to in bed is fucking awesome!

And an adorably sweet smile!? My homoerotic wrestler of the month
has it ALL going on!

I’m entirely ready to admit that I could be completely wrong about the backstory that I’ve convinced myself to fill in for hot hunk Christian Taylor (aka Chris Cox). He could totally be punching the clock. He could be an asshole narcissist with an ego that can barely squeeze it’s way into the BG East matroom. He could be a body facist, condescending, frigid bastard who knows precisely the worth of his every asset and how to exploit a homoerotic wrestling audience like a maestro waving a baton. But I don’t think so. And more importantly, I don’t believe so. Because Christian has sold me, lock, stock and barrel, on a fully formed, deeply arousing, fantastically entertaining through-story, and whatever he gets up to off camera, when he’s on camera I’m entranced and fully engaged.  So it’s no wonder at all that he’s joined the ranks of those who’ve so completely captured and controlled my lusts on their way to earning the title of homoerotic wrestler of the month.
Mike Martin is instantly under Christian’s spell in
incredibly sexy Undagear 18 

Nicely played, Christian. Nicely played.

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

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I received this pic and message from Kid Karisma last night:

“Happy birthday… if you were here, you wouldn’t be able to sit!”
My Birthday Present

For those who may not be tracking, for my birthday, I went through the mental exercise of deciding which homoerotic wrestler I’d pick to deliver my spanking in honor of my birthday. There are plenty of wrestlers who I’d be more than happy to be bent over their knees for them to slap my ass repeatedly. But in the end (so to speak), I decided that my top choice for the job would be my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma.

I’m ready to assume the position!

Now, Kid K mentioned that he reads this blog, and he even granted me a dizzyingly delightful interview. But I swear, I wasn’t angling for a shout out by the karismatic one. However, I’m thrilled to get such a sweet gift, and absolutely anything that Kid K would want to do to my ass to make it so sore that I couldn’t sit down would be just fine with me! He’s probably just lucky that I’m not inclined toward stalking, because his message makes me want to track down where “here” is in order to make him pay up.

He’s my favorite for so many reasons…

Do other cultures have tradition of getting spanked on your birthday? I know that there are neverland readers from other parts of the world, so I’m not sure if the concept of swatting someone’s ass to celebrate their birthday translates everywhere. I remember a number of birthdays as a kid getting held down, protesting, as I was spanked, one painful swat for each year. As I explain this for readers who might not have heard of the tradition, it suddenly strikes me how completely bizarre and non-sensical it sounds. I suppose that’s the way with a lot of traditions.

Kid Karisma is practiced at bending a lucky opponent
across his knee.

Now that I’m all grown up (sort of), a little celebratory corporal punishment takes on a whole new significance. If Kid K got down on one knee, I really wouldn’t have to be forced to assume the position, though putting up a token fight would just make it that much hotter. I really wouldn’t sincerely protest feeling the sting of the palm of Kid K’s hand cracking down on my naked cheeks (because let me assure you, I’d insist on them being naked for this ritual!). Sure, I’d make a good show of grunting and whimpering, perhaps even a little pleading for mercy, but it would just be to contribute to the drama of being in the clutches, under the control, and entirely at the mercy of a certain freckle-faced, dimple-chinned, gloriously-gluted, muscleman of my fantasies.

Gorgeous, merciless, and generous!

Thanks, Kid Karisma! Your hold on the top spot of my favorite homoerotic wrestlers us just that much tighter. Poor, lovely Lon Dumont has merely more distance to make up if he thinks he’s going to knock your gorgeous ass off the throne!

Make Me Feel It!

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Rolando delivers the whacks on Mike Paris in BG East’s Ringwars 7
I know somebody who needs a spanking today… and that somebody is me!
Bruce Hill and Trenton Comeaux bend over and take it
like men from Eduardo in Can-Am’s All American Oil Trio Muscle Bash
It’s my birthday! I love my birthdays. I have friends who dread them, but I’ve never had a birthday that I didn’t look forward to. You know what they say about the alternative. Another year older is another year not being dead yet, and I love life. So bring on spanking!
It must have been Peter Bishop’s birthday when he wrestled Dino Phillips
in BG East’s X-Fights 11
Normally, spanking isn’t exactly my thing. I mean, physical domination and humiliation works for me (like I need to tell a neverland reader that!), but spanking for the sake of spanking isn’t at the top of my list of what I need. But a birthday isn’t a typical day, and particularly after searching for some hot photos of homoerotic wrestlers leaving a handprint on some shiny, bare assess, I know what I’m wishing for as I blow out my birthday cake candles. 
Brad Rochelle leaves a mark on Billyboy’s vulnerable cheeks in BG East’s Demolition 2
I had decided to come up with a list (because I seem to be all about lists and awards lately) of the homoerotic wrestlers I’d most prefer to deliver my whacks. The image of Brad Rochelle’s fingerprints outlined in angry red across Billyboy’s lucky ass in BG East’s Demolition 2 quickly popped into my mind. I’d lie about it being my birthday once a month if it meant I’d be forced to assume the position across Brad’s thigh!
Cameron Mathews won’t soon forget to call him
Mr. Joshua after his Wrestler Spotlight encounter

My perpetual crush on BG East’s Joshua Goodman (that’s Mr. Joshua to you!) makes me strongly identify with the lucky, lovely bubble butt of Cameron Mathews getting wedgied and swatted a hot red under the complete control of Mr. Joshua’s gorgeous body for Cameron’s Wrestler Spotlight.  I’d refuse to call him “Mr. Joshua” for at least 42 whacks (or so), just to soak in the sublime ecstasy of suffering a Joshua Goodman humiliation!

Love hurts in BG East’s Sexy Showdown 6

The image of ripped, studly twink Skip Vance landing a cracking open palm across his lover’s naked ass in BG East’s Sexy Showdown 6 works for me as well, with extra credit for the fact that the lanky lover getting spanked here is none other than reigning homoerotic wrestler of the month, Christian Taylor (aka Chris Cox).  The sweetest birthday present of all would probably be joining in on this intensely erotic homo wrestling fun, trading places with each of these gorgeous boys giving and taking my butt clenching smacks!

Skip gets it back from Mike Martin in BG East’s Wet & Wild 4 

Of course, Skip taking his whacks is also an inspiring sight, with handsome hottie Mike Martin sitting on his face and yanking down his trunks. Yep, this would be my choice of the preferred position for me to be forced to assume for my birthday spanking.

Kid Karisma leaves Z-Man’s glutes quivering in Summer Sizzlers 2
But all right, if I have to pick the one homoerotic wrestling hunk to make celebrating hurt so good… if I’m backed into a corner and required to pick just one out of the lineup of my favorite wrestlers to star in my own personal spanking birthday fantasy, truth be told, I’d pick my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy), Kid Karisma. The reasons are many, but first and foremost, Kid K clearly enjoys the task… a lot!  His evil laughter at yanking Z-Man’s trunks up his crack and making the playboy model spasm in shock at the hard swat sends chills down my spine while warming my crotch delightfully.

Headscissors-as-excuse for an ass slapping.
Kid Karisma absolutely tenderized the twinky ass of fierce little Len Harder for boatloads of Florida Fun. From just about every angle, Kid K beat on Len’s skinny ass relentlessly.
Fold-over face-pin underneath Kid K’s crotch? Just another opportunity to slap ass!
And as Kid Karisma himself made quite clear, he’s nothing if not the life of the party. So definitely, to celebrate my day I’m thinking of a certain red-headed, musclebound, freckle faced, bubble-butted beauty to pin me down, sit on my face, and pound out slow, nothing-held-back whacks across my bare ass, raising a perfectly harmonized chorus of my cries of pain and Kid K’s rumbles of sadistic laughter.

Then let’s turn down the lights, turn up the house music, and dance until I drop on my bright red, aching, happy ass in exhaustion! Life is good!

Say My Name!!!

wrestlebard2 Comments
As I’ve been spending quality time with Kid Karisma and Austin Cooper in the ring, I’m finding more and more that turns my crank. My reigning homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy division) is like a maestro, conducting this symphony of slaps, grunts, groans and bangs with awe inspiring grace. 
Kid K looks like he might kum to the soundtrack of
Austin Cooper’s screams.
There’s a knee-buckling moment for me when Kid Karisma locks up Austin’s ankles underneath his armpits and drops that jaw-droppingly gorgeous ass on top of Austin’s entirely mouthwatering derrière. Kid K is literally glowing with the overhead lights bouncing off his bulging muscles coated in such thick sweat I swear I can smell it. Kid is a vision, with a primal lust to dominate reaches climax as his face is transported into ecstatic reverie. Lovely Austin is screaming like 9-year old girl, but his bulging crotch leaves no room to mistake the fact that he’s all man, and he’s all twisted up in complete, hopeless, helpless humiliation.  “Say you give!” demands Kid K with a grin.  When Austin finally screams it out obediently, the karismatic one, chuckles and says, “Wait, wait, wait… what, what, what? I DIDN’T hear you!” he adds arching backward and wrenching Austin’s back harder.  It’s a climactic moment for me as well, but then Kid K sends me right over the top by refusing to let Austin admit defeat until he’s said his conquer’s name. “Now say, ‘I give Kid Karisma!'”
“I GIVE Kid Karisma!!!”
Holy hell I LOVE that! The intimacy quadruples in an instant. The submission is just the beginning as Kid K refuses to let up even after Austin’s tapped. Austin finally gasps through his sublime suffering, “I give… Kid… Karisma!” He chokes and sputters. Kid K flings Austin’s beautiful, beefy legs to the mat with contempt, stands up still straddling the rookie’s gorgeous glutes, and flexes for himself in the mirror.  I’ve lost it a half a dozen times before I can manage to get through all the way to simply admire Kid K’s stunning display, marveling not just a little over the major bulge stretching the crotch of his shiny black trunks. Fuck yes, Austin had better remember the name Kid Karisma!
Vintage Beau Hopkins chokes Jimmy Royce’s submission (and obedience)
right out of him.

This “say my name” moment transports me back to the first homoerotic wrestling product I ever purchased, Can-Am’s Canadian Musclehunk Oil Wrestling 3. Specifically, the wet muscle tussle between butt-tastic Jimmy Royce and handsome company man, Beau Hopkins intrudes on my thoughts. I’m sure I’ve mentioned this match before. Royce and Hopkins are incredibly appealing. Jimmy seems to have a trick shoulder that gives him trouble, and like an opportunistic dick, Beau goes to wrenching that shoulder with arm bars over and over again. This would have been annoyingly repetitive if it weren’t usually accomplished with Jimmy on his stomach, trying not to swallow baby oil, and Beau straddling Jimmy’s INCREDIBLE muscle ass. I could look at that view for days. Beau attacks Jimmy’s trick shoulder for the 400th time, and all of those sweet, sculpted muscles on Jimmy turn to jelly when Beau’s got his arm torqued too far for Jimmy to be able to resist absolutely anything. Beau makes him lick the oil and sweat that are pooling on the blue tarp. He exploits and abuses Jimmy’s knees and lower back. Finally, a little awkwardly, he slides his legs around Jimmy’s throat and begins to squeeze. Jimmy tries to pry himself free, but Beau grabs his wrists and keeps him helpless on his back, feeling the air and blood pinched off between Beau’s knees digging into his throat.  “Say the word!” Beau barks at Jimmy. “Do you give, Jimmy Royce!?” He finally squeezes two humiliating “I GIVES!” out of Jimmy, but Beau holds on for one more. “Say it again! Say ‘I give Mr. Beau Hopkins!” Jimmy croaks it out, full of bitter resentment, “I… give… Mr. Beau…….. Hopkins.”

Mr. Jimmy Royce turns the tables.

After dropping the first fall, Jimmy battles back for a surprise 2nd fall victory by locking up Beau’s arms with his luscious legs (good GOD this man had to have been a dancer!). The chicken wing is incredibly tasty.  Beau’s hot torso and barely contained bulge writhe and buck, but all Jimmy has to do is squeeze and Beau’s arms start to pop right of out his shoulder sockets. Jimmy taunts his opponent, asking if he wants to quit. “You’re finished!” Jimmy proclaims without any doubt. “Do you want to give? Huh, do you want to give yet, baby?” Ferociously Beau refuses with a deep, wolverine growl, “Never!” Jimmy squeezes his meat-packed thighs a little harder and makes Beau gasp in pain and quickly rethink his absolutes. He finally gives, but Jimmy insists, “I can’t hear you!” Beau growls out another contemptuous submission and Jimmy prods him on at the end, “… Mr.?  Mr. Jimmy Royce?” Jimmy demands retribution, insisting on hearing Beau not just admit defeat, but say the name of the muscle stud who’s conquered him from behind. “Mr. WHO!?” Beau spits defiantly at first, but when it’s clear Jimmy can either hold him helplessly like this forever or, perhaps, snap his shoulders apart completely, Beau reluctantly, bitterly snaps, “I… give… Mr…. Jimmy…….. Royce!”

Reigning Favorite Homoerotic Wrestler, Kid Karisma
bulges in ALL the right places!

Unlike for Kid Karisma, Jimmy learns the hard way that payback is one seriously nasty bitch. He goes down in the 3rd fall as a result of Beau going yet again for the trick shoulder. But even with all that oil, all those muscles, Jimmy’s slamming muscled ass, that hot, wet, tight wrestling action… it’s the submissions that demand of the loser to name the winner that stick out as the highlights of those falls. There’s just something primal about shoving your name down your opponent’s throat, like owning a bit of his soul just like you’ve completely owned his body. I’m sure there are plenty of other examples of the “Say My Name” submission (please do tell!), but I’m awfully pleased with Kid K’s latest rendition of this hot, hot, hot erotic wrestling maneuver!